FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Club Discussion > Why ladies for 3some are so rare ?
Why ladies for 3some are so rare ?
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By *ouloute OP Couple
over a year ago
Meet Anywhere in the UK |
Hi all swingers ... we have our profile set for 1 year. We dont do club. However we dont seem to get any interest in ladies for our FFM ..... we are good looking couple and sexy enough to get some interest ... so I am wondering why these ladies are so rare and perhaps we would have more chance in clubs ?
Anyway I like to have your views and experience as well .. It feels to me than Men have more chance with couples than couples with ladies .. am I right ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not sure that you are right. It takes more than looks for a start though perhaps the club scene isn't the best place for an FFM. There are plenty of us women interested but we take a little more work than the men and most of the men don't go through with it when it gets to that point. |
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By *ancy38Woman
over a year ago
galway |
"Hi all swingers ... we have our profile set for 1 year. We dont do club. However we dont seem to get any interest in ladies for our FFM ..... we are good looking couple and sexy enough to get some interest ... so I am wondering why these ladies are so rare and perhaps we would have more chance in clubs ?
Anyway I like to have your views and experience as well .. It feels to me than Men have more chance with couples than couples with ladies .. am I right ? "
I am always interested in meeting new cples |
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By *ouloute OP Couple
over a year ago
Meet Anywhere in the UK |
"Hi all swingers ... we have our profile set for 1 year. We dont do club. However we dont seem to get any interest in ladies for our FFM ..... we are good looking couple and sexy enough to get some interest ... so I am wondering why these ladies are so rare and perhaps we would have more chance in clubs ?
Anyway I like to have your views and experience as well .. It feels to me than Men have more chance with couples than couples with ladies .. am I right ?
I am always interested in meeting new cples"
Thank you for your encouraging message Nancy... Really good to know ... You are based in Ireland  ... |
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By *ouloute OP Couple
over a year ago
Meet Anywhere in the UK |
"Not sure that you are right. It takes more than looks for a start though perhaps the club scene isn't the best place for an FFM. There are plenty of us women interested but we take a little more work than the men and most of the men don't go through with it when it gets to that point."
Perhaps you are right ... I am wondering if its better for Mr to chat with or Mrs with Mrs ... perhaps ladies prefer chatting with the husband more than the wife ? |
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By *ady23Woman
over a year ago
Coventry |
"Hi all swingers ... we have our profile set for 1 year. We dont do club. However we dont seem to get any interest in ladies for our FFM ..... we are good looking couple and sexy enough to get some interest ... so I am wondering why these ladies are so rare and perhaps we would have more chance in clubs ?
Anyway I like to have your views and experience as well .. It feels to me than Men have more chance with couples than couples with ladies .. am I right ? "
I must admit we have had a challenge as the female I play and my partner only plays with me. We find it quite difficult people don't want a a couple where only the lady plays they want full swap yet some profiles say they want a female to join a couple but they dismiss a full couple when the lady only plays makes no sense.
Single men seem to want female on her own but the profile clearly says part of a couple and the same reasons as the lady I need my partner about until I was able to trust somebody |
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By *ouloute OP Couple
over a year ago
Meet Anywhere in the UK |
"Would love to meet a couple in their 50's for some family role play fun x"
Your profile dont mention MF but only MM so we are assuming you are not looking for MF couple ... if we are wrong please get in touch if you can verify yourself as your profile is not (sorry if we are wrong) xx |
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"Would love to meet a couple in their 50's for some family role play fun x
Your profile dont mention MF but only MM so we are assuming you are not looking for MF couple ... if we are wrong please get in touch if you can verify yourself as your profile is not (sorry if we are wrong) xx "
updated xx |
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By *ouloute OP Couple
over a year ago
Meet Anywhere in the UK |
"Would love to meet a couple in their 50's for some family role play fun x
Your profile dont mention MF but only MM so we are assuming you are not looking for MF couple ... if we are wrong please get in touch if you can verify yourself as your profile is not (sorry if we are wrong) xx
updated xx "
Ok ! We sent you a message .. ! x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As someone who is lucky enough to have recieved a message from you (thanks for the interest and compliments!), I can give you a little insight into what happened in my mind:
I read the message - you mention that you like my profile and pics and hope that I like yours. From what you said, I can tell that you read my profile and guess that you are polite, friendly people. Yay!
I go to your profile and read it all through. I think: these seem like nice people who would be fun to play with, although the stuff about only meeting in hotels is a little strange and may be restrictive (I think youve updated your profile since then though...).
I dont see any distinguishing features about you, or anything to catch my attention otherwise - you just seem like lovely people.
I think about replying and asking you questions to find out some more about you and cant decide whether I have the energy for that. I sigh, put down my phone and go and grab a biscuit. When I come back, I have a message from another couple. Like you, they seem lovely... I consider replying to them but dont... In the meantime, your message sits in my inbox, forgotten about.
Youre not doing anything wrong, but there is nothing to distinguish you from all the other couples im afraid. We single ladies cant play with you all, and dont have the energy to chat with all the potential people.
Maybe make your messages even more personalised? Ask some questions based on what you read? Say something that makes the person feel like there is something in common (beyond the obvious)? Make it easy for the person to reply so that they dont have to think of the questions first?
Or add some more info to your profile that sets you apart from others
Anyways... I hope that helps! Good luck! X |
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By *ouloute OP Couple
over a year ago
Meet Anywhere in the UK |
"Hi all swingers ... we have our profile set for 1 year. We dont do club. However we dont seem to get any interest in ladies for our FFM ..... we are good looking couple and sexy enough to get some interest ... so I am wondering why these ladies are so rare and perhaps we would have more chance in clubs ?
Anyway I like to have your views and experience as well .. It feels to me than Men have more chance with couples than couples with ladies .. am I right ?
I must admit we have had a challenge as the female I play and my partner only plays with me. We find it quite difficult people don't want a a couple where only the lady plays they want full swap yet some profiles say they want a female to join a couple but they dismiss a full couple when the lady only plays makes no sense.
Single men seem to want female on her own but the profile clearly says part of a couple and the same reasons as the lady I need my partner about until I was able to trust somebody"
Thats right, if the profile is set as a couple then it means its for everybody to enjoy... some might enjoy the physical aspects other find arousing to watch their partner a bit as well ... really it varies .. |
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We have also found it difficult to meet single ladies. Though we enjoy meeting guys and couples so it has not really been too much of an issue. At some point we will meet a sexy woman we can spoil together  |
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By *ouloute OP Couple
over a year ago
Meet Anywhere in the UK |
"We have also found it difficult to meet single ladies. Though we enjoy meeting guys and couples so it has not really been too much of an issue. At some point we will meet a sexy woman we can spoil together "
We do have lot of interest from couples ... the ratio couples/couples is high but I (mrs) just not into other men than my partner so this limit us as well .. We will keep hope !!! lol |
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Clubs could be ideal.
As someone said earlier, messages on here get a bit mundane and they get forgotten about. In a club you are face to face, can suss each other out, and really bounce off each others energy...and maybe each others bodies in the end!
You don't know unless you try
Good luck in your search |
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"Hi all swingers ... we have our profile set for 1 year. We dont do club. However we dont seem to get any interest in ladies for our FFM ..... we are good looking couple and sexy enough to get some interest ... so I am wondering why these ladies are so rare and perhaps we would have more chance in clubs ?
Anyway I like to have your views and experience as well .. It feels to me than Men have more chance with couples than couples with ladies .. am I right ? "
It's quite difficult initially.
We had to put ourselves around quite a bit, get yourself known and get verifications.
Our first meet with a lady was the female part of a couple we met, then a lady from a party we attended and met a couple of ladies in a club.
One in Cap D'Agde on holiday.
Not easy but not impossible either, sadly lots of timewasters too.
Good luck.
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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago
Up on them there hills |
It’s not often we don’t enjoy the company of another lady in clubs.
Sometimes you sense couples “hunt” s/f’s. Then again I suspect there are a lot of trophy hunter on here.
We have a female girlfriend who relationship is great. We have also a number of female repeat offenders.
The feeling of scarcity some couples project brings about an intensity and need, not a good behaviour or appealing to those who are looking purely for a great time and sensual fun I suspect.
Equally, many single females are not there to teach they, quite rightly, are looking for fun and their needs to be met.
Just our perspective. |
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By *ouloute OP Couple
over a year ago
Meet Anywhere in the UK |
"We have also found it difficult to meet single ladies. Though we enjoy meeting guys and couples so it has not really been too much of an issue. At some point we will meet a sexy woman we can spoil together "
Thanks for your feedback and good luck to you guys xx |
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By *ouloute OP Couple
over a year ago
Meet Anywhere in the UK |
"It’s not often we don’t enjoy the company of another lady in clubs.
Sometimes you sense couples “hunt” s/f’s. Then again I suspect there are a lot of trophy hunter on here.
We have a female girlfriend who relationship is great. We have also a number of female repeat offenders.
The feeling of scarcity some couples project brings about an intensity and need, not a good behaviour or appealing to those who are looking purely for a great time and sensual fun I suspect.
Equally, many single females are not there to teach they, quite rightly, are looking for fun and their needs to be met.
Just our perspective."
Thank you ... interesting and I can see your point xx |
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By *ouloute OP Couple
over a year ago
Meet Anywhere in the UK |
"Hi all swingers ... we have our profile set for 1 year. We dont do club. However we dont seem to get any interest in ladies for our FFM ..... we are good looking couple and sexy enough to get some interest ... so I am wondering why these ladies are so rare and perhaps we would have more chance in clubs ?
Anyway I like to have your views and experience as well .. It feels to me than Men have more chance with couples than couples with ladies .. am I right ?
It's quite difficult initially.
We had to put ourselves around quite a bit, get yourself known and get verifications.
Our first meet with a lady was the female part of a couple we met, then a lady from a party we attended and met a couple of ladies in a club.
One in Cap D'Agde on holiday.
Not easy but not impossible either, sadly lots of timewasters too.
Good luck.
"
It is not impossible as you say its just lack of energy after timewasters ... the frustration building ! xx |
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By *ouloute OP Couple
over a year ago
Meet Anywhere in the UK |
"Clubs could be ideal.
As someone said earlier, messages on here get a bit mundane and they get forgotten about. In a club you are face to face, can suss each other out, and really bounce off each others energy...and maybe each others bodies in the end!
You don't know unless you try
Good luck in your search"
Totally agree with you... but we cannot do weekend which is where you have the most of them ...  |
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By *elkieWoman
over a year ago
Durham |
Most of the time, I have couples blocked. Good manners - sign your messages so I know who I’m talking to. I want to see interaction between the two of you to determine whether I want to play with you at all, so moving offsite to a group chat works. You both need to make me laugh, and I need to feel a click with both of you.
What actually happens is that if I reply to a first message they immediately suggest a meet.
So yeah, clubs work a lot better in my opinion. |
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First, we'd say clubs are your best bet. At a club you can just meet single ladies and know pretty early if you all get on and it's going to work (or not). It's neutral territory for everyone and no pressure (which leads on to the next point). Many single ladies are aware that meeting a couple online puts them very much into your world and this can be an uncomfortable feeling. And not all couples are very good really making a single woman feel equal or not like a human sex toy. Sometimes the rules and boundaries (which is perfectly legitimate) can be very restrictive for the lady or make her feel like a 2nd class entity in the whole thing. So single ladies experienced with FMF are very wary of couples online and often stick with tried and tested couples. In our experience clubs are the best place.
If you are going to a club be aware that with single ladies, couples may not hold the same capital as they do on FAB. A lot of single ladies go to clubs to find single men. They don't want to be a spare piece to a couple or their play thing. So there maybe value in going to a couples and single ladies night. Because the chances are the single ladies at such a night are happy with couples and/or seek couples. Although bring your A game because competition is strong on said night. Or better still be yourselves and find the right lady for you. But remember I know you've said your great people and attractive etc but attraction is a very subjective thing. People want that chemistry which hard to display or build online. |
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Likewise we are always interested in having a lady join us , we have been to club on numerous occasions and put our interest on here .how ever we have had fmf fun at partys , but they are few and far between in our area , we feel it’s very like meeting couples where every body clicks , hence most of our meets are mfm , with another guy joining us or when , I may join other couples , if only we could accomodate then we would probably host partys |
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By *ouloute OP Couple
over a year ago
Meet Anywhere in the UK |
"First, we'd say clubs are your best bet. At a club you can just meet single ladies and know pretty early if you all get on and it's going to work (or not). It's neutral territory for everyone and no pressure (which leads on to the next point). Many single ladies are aware that meeting a couple online puts them very much into your world and this can be an uncomfortable feeling. And not all couples are very good really making a single woman feel equal or not like a human sex toy. Sometimes the rules and boundaries (which is perfectly legitimate) can be very restrictive for the lady or make her feel like a 2nd class entity in the whole thing. So single ladies experienced with FMF are very wary of couples online and often stick with tried and tested couples. In our experience clubs are the best place.
If you are going to a club be aware that with single ladies, couples may not hold the same capital as they do on FAB. A lot of single ladies go to clubs to find single men. They don't want to be a spare piece to a couple or their play thing. So there maybe value in going to a couples and single ladies night. Because the chances are the single ladies at such a night are happy with couples and/or seek couples. Although bring your A game because competition is strong on said night. Or better still be yourselves and find the right lady for you. But remember I know you've said your great people and attractive etc but attraction is a very subjective thing. People want that chemistry which hard to display or build online. "
Thank you for the in-depth feedback and yes I totally see all your points and all is making great sense... yes online is a very subjectif matter , face to face is the best way to figure out ...The beauty to club is that you dont waste your time spending hours browsing and wasting time ... Our limitation to exclude weekends is the big factor but I am sure we will manage as some club are open during the week .. Keeping Smiling  |
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By *ouloute OP Couple
over a year ago
Meet Anywhere in the UK |
"Most of the time, I have couples blocked. Good manners - sign your messages so I know who I’m talking to. I want to see interaction between the two of you to determine whether I want to play with you at all, so moving offsite to a group chat works. You both need to make me laugh, and I need to feel a click with both of you.
What actually happens is that if I reply to a first message they immediately suggest a meet.
So yeah, clubs work a lot better in my opinion."
Yes totally with you on this ... if I was single I would expect the same .. be wicky teasy smily and happy with a good sense of humour is a must for both parties otherwise its pretty boring isnt it !!!! lol xx |
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By *hynot3Man
over a year ago
Middlesbrough |
For what it’s worth I think you should definitely hook up with them read both profiles seem well suited…enjoy…thank me later lol
"As someone who is lucky enough to have recieved a message from you (thanks for the interest and compliments!), I can give you a little insight into what happened in my mind:
I read the message - you mention that you like my profile and pics and hope that I like yours. From what you said, I can tell that you read my profile and guess that you are polite, friendly people. Yay!
I go to your profile and read it all through. I think: these seem like nice people who would be fun to play with, although the stuff about only meeting in hotels is a little strange and may be restrictive (I think youve updated your profile since then though...).
I dont see any distinguishing features about you, or anything to catch my attention otherwise - you just seem like lovely people.
I think about replying and asking you questions to find out some more about you and cant decide whether I have the energy for that. I sigh, put down my phone and go and grab a biscuit. When I come back, I have a message from another couple. Like you, they seem lovely... I consider replying to them but dont... In the meantime, your message sits in my inbox, forgotten about.
Youre not doing anything wrong, but there is nothing to distinguish you from all the other couples im afraid. We single ladies cant play with you all, and dont have the energy to chat with all the potential people.
Maybe make your messages even more personalised? Ask some questions based on what you read? Say something that makes the person feel like there is something in common (beyond the obvious)? Make it easy for the person to reply so that they dont have to think of the questions first?
Or add some more info to your profile that sets you apart from others
Anyways... I hope that helps! Good luck! X "
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