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BGHS new rules
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I keep hearing that BGHS has changed its rules about palying in the restrooms. Can anyone clarify exactly what they are. We know there is a no touching rule in the wet areas, but it would now appear that you cant upstairs as well. Is this true? |
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Then there hasn't been a rule change as its always been that way. There's an interesting thread on their own forum where someone suggested closing the rest rooms for 2 or 3 days a week to see if this would attract more single ladies as maybe they are being put off going because they'll get hassled - whereas without the rest rooms it is just a naturist spa like you get in Germany or Holland. The owner Sam didn't take very well to the content of that thread as it continued and I think is basically in denial about the rest rooms and what goes on in there, and the fact that naturist spas in Europe DO indeed attract about a 65-35 ratio of women to men and maybe hers doesn't because of the rooms. But perhaps if the rules have changed she has taken this idea on board or at least is trying something different? |
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Don't know whats going on, someone emailed me on here saying there is no more swinging or use of the rest rooms for sexual activity, yet most on here are saying otherwise.
Think I'll head down tomorrow and find out - Friday evenings its always quiet in the rooms anyway so the only difference will be to see if they have a new sign up or something.  |
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Ok if they have changed the rules they need to update their own FAQ section on their website:
“Can I “cuddle” my partner in your spa?”
Yes you may as long as “cuddling” in our facilities does not mean wrapping your legs around someone! We want you to feel respected as adults and find yourself a place to be romantic with your loved one. But we do not allow any blatant sexuality within our open facilities. We believe in choice, giving people the freedom to talk over important issues with their partner, chill out, or just be without the kids for an evening. We have provided warm, comfortable private rest rooms; please enjoy them if you wish to be more adult without the risk of offending people.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Last time we went there a couple of weeks ago there was no rule change obvious but there were automatic door closers installed on two of the larger rest rooms. We were also ticked off for making too much noise in the rest rooms.
That said there is plenty of play still going on. |
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"Last time we went there a couple of weeks ago there was no rule change obvious but there were automatic door closers installed on two of the larger rest rooms. We were also ticked off for making too much noise in the rest rooms.
That said there is plenty of play still going on. "
We were ticked off on our last visit for washing each others backs in the shower!  |
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Right I went last night and all the doors have closers on them now. I think this is stupid because some people want to leave them open and the big main room is still open with no door. Why are they taking away people's right to choose? There is also a printed sign stuck on one of the doors saying not to prop it open and that rooms are to be kept private, i.e. between the lines I would say they don't want swinging, sharing, watching or swapping. They are however, still accepting that couples might (will) use the rooms for sex.
I don't see how or what they think people will use the rooms for if not sex, especially the mirrored room - I don't believe they are that naïve or stupid to think people just go in there for a sleep or a rest, not when you can do that in other parts of the venue anyway.
Anyway as I said, it was Friday night which meant nothing was going on besides the usual 1 or 2 couples who lock the doors anyway, so if they are aiming for more nights like that I don't think door closers are the answer! |
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We were there yesterday, there's been no change in the ability to play in the rest rooms.
Yes it's primarily a naturist spa where, often due to people pushing their luck, no interaction is allowed downstairs. Which means you can relax and chat without undue attention.
The new notices upstairs are to discourage people standing in the corridor by the entrance to the play rooms. It must be quite daunting for anyone new to it to try and get past people stood by the door. There's nothing stopping you from going up as a group and using the mirror room, black room etc or just walk around the corner to the large open white room.
I'm not sure why there's been a couple of times when staff have called out to keep the noise down, maybe sound was travelling to the food area! They've not come in or stopped any play though so nothing to get upset about.
Still as great fun as ever and low cost for potentially ten hours of spa and fun. |
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On Friday though it was quite funny because I noticed while no one stood in the area by the door, they simply moved back to the corridor area near the mirrored room door. Then another time I wondered in, you had the usual guys who waste their time sitting in a room, except now of course the doors close so you can only just see through the crack if anyone is in there. God knows why anyone would waste their time doing this but there are always a few who do.
Then there was a group who chose to sit on the sofas just across from the main door and moan about the lack of action they were getting to each other. I was relaxing on the beds upstairs and it was hilarious listening to the conversation! |
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Further info posted on the BGHS forum by the owner:
Hello Everyone.
It seems there are rumours gossip, assumptions and general misinformation floating around regarding the restroom area, locks and door closers, so I thought a little clarity might help.
As you all know we generally leave you all to follow the very simple etiquette rules of the restroom areas and police it yourselves. We want to leave you to make your own decisions and be adult about this area but a small number of people for what ever reason, seem to not understand why hanging in the corridor or knocking on doors is just totally unacceptable behaviour to everyone. Likewise, although there is no time limit in these rooms it is also unacceptable to monopolise a whole room for the night.
When the locks and door closers weren't on the doors quite simply we found more people would hang in the corridor and therefore there was more discord, so after a number of people asked for locks and privacy we decided to put the locks and door closers on. This has certainly reduced the amount of people hanging in the corridors and has made a number of you much happier but it also seems to have upset another set of people who like the freedom of the open space.
So... knowing it is impossible to please everyone at all times but still trying to find a compromise we have temporarily removed the lock from the mirror room only. All other locks are still in place and the door closers will stay.
We are going to assess public opinion and keep looking at ideas to make this area suitable for all.
In the meantime there is a mix of locked and unlocked rooms. Under no circumstance should doors be wedged open as this increases the chance of loiterers and no one likes them. This area continues to be an area for you. We are not trying to change it's use, we are simply trying to make sure that it is not an assumption that your choice is everyone else's.
Whilst we're on the topic I also need to remind a few people who have tried to increase the restroom area to include the top deck that this is not part of the same restroom space and there is a zero tolerance policy on all activities outside the designated restroom area.
Interesting that they always say over the years they have thought of every idea anyone ever suggests and are confident they have the workings of the spa down to a fine art, yet here they are asking for public opinion and showing a level of uncertainty about the locks.
End of the day, if you put the lock on but not the closer, people have the choice - if its not closed or its not locked that means people in the room probably don't mind loiterers - the problem arises when there is nothing going on or the door is firmly shut and locked and these morons hang about outside it like puppies waiting to be tossed a few crumbs from the bottom of the biscuit barrel.
Its also interesting removing the lock from the mirrored room - you may as well remove the door then, because people will just go in and as there is a short corridor leading to the actual bed area by the time people get into that bit it will be hard for the occupants to ask anyone to leave again. There never used to be a door on this room so either do it properly with a lock or get rid!
I don't know whats happening at BGHS these days, it really feels like they don't know what they want to be or what their identity is anymore.  |
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Having door closers is lunacy. The Spa should be promoting sexual freedom not keep adding more and more rules. The rooms should have locks but their use should be discretionary.
BGHS needs to decide if it wants swingers or not and embrace that decision. I have visited the venue 7 or 8 times and think the facilities are great and could work either as a venue which is a naturist Spa without play rooms or a venue which is friendly to the swinging community. The current regime seem to want the money from swingers but aren't willing to provide the enviroment that the swingers want.
Regardless of whether you are pro or anti swinging what they have done is a bad business decision.
Personaly I think they should embrace swinging and not treat their swinger customers with the level of contempt they seem to do. |
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Yes totally agree Dave. I've been dozens of times over the last 10 years and always felt that how it was both run and promoted seemed to 'work' in its own way. There were always a few people who didn't get it, but it really wasn't complicated. Now it just feels a bit confusing and as though they've lost their way. The better solution would be simply for a member of staff to discreetly enter the rest room area every half hour or so to check people aren't loitering and move them on - they seem really worried about staff going in this area but if its just to the corridor area every once in a while and for a good reason then no one would mind that. It wouldn't even be necessary on couples evenings when there is more action going on. |
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They're absolutely sure of the establishment that they want to run: a naturist spa, pure and simple.
They provide us with an area which we can all use as swingers, on the understanding that we only do that in those rooms. This seems to be difficult for some to understand.
They don't like going into the rest room area as they, and their staff are not swingers so don't really want to. Totally understandable.
So it would appear that they've tried to make some changes that have been asked for, lockable rooms, less men loitering outside rooms and knocking etc. Trouble is some of us want door locks, some don't. They try to provide a middle ground with some basic rules so that adults can see what is acceptable.
It can't be easy to facilitate swinging if you don't want it to be the main purpose of the business but still want to let us swing.
So the main rules, don't play anywhere other than the rest rooms, don't all hang around in the corridor at the entrance to the rest rooms and that's about it. Not exactly too much trouble is it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Agree with previous comments. But I would just like to add that as far as I'm concerned common sense and respect for other spa users (and the owners) is mainly what is needed to ensure all enjoy the facilities as they want. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"They're absolutely sure of the establishment that they want to run: a naturist spa, pure and simple.
They provide us with an area which we can all use as swingers, on the understanding that we only do that in those rooms. This seems to be difficult for some to understand.
They don't like going into the rest room area as they, and their staff are not swingers so don't really want to. Totally understandable.
So it would appear that they've tried to make some changes that have been asked for, lockable rooms, less men loitering outside rooms and knocking etc. Trouble is some of us want door locks, some don't. They try to provide a middle ground with some basic rules so that adults can see what is acceptable.
It can't be easy to facilitate swinging if you don't want it to be the main purpose of the business but still want to let us swing.
So the main rules, don't play anywhere other than the rest rooms, don't all hang around in the corridor at the entrance to the rest rooms and that's about it. Not exactly too much trouble is it"
I agree with this, we rather enjoy bghs but have never been interested in using the rest rooms due to the intimidating atmosphere you have with guys hanging around the rest rooms.
As already stated the building is a spa not swingers venue. They just allow swingers to use the building |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"They're absolutely sure of the establishment that they want to run: a naturist spa, pure and simple.
They provide us with an area which we can all use as swingers, on the understanding that we only do that in those rooms. This seems to be difficult for some to understand.
They don't like going into the rest room area as they, and their staff are not swingers so don't really want to. Totally understandable.
So it would appear that they've tried to make some changes that have been asked for, lockable rooms, less men loitering outside rooms and knocking etc. Trouble is some of us want door locks, some don't. They try to provide a middle ground with some basic rules so that adults can see what is acceptable.
It can't be easy to facilitate swinging if you don't want it to be the main purpose of the business but still want to let us swing.
So the main rules, don't play anywhere other than the rest rooms, don't all hang around in the corridor at the entrance to the rest rooms and that's about it. Not exactly too much trouble is it
I agree with this, we rather enjoy bghs but have never been interested in using the rest rooms due to the intimidating atmosphere you have with guys hanging around the rest rooms.
As already stated the building is a spa not swingers venue. They just allow swingers to use the building "
Absolutly agree |
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I agree too, however I also think the point that they want the swingers' money but don't really want them there is a good one. Also the rooms have always had locks on the doors, that wasn't the point - its these door closers they have put on that have caused the issue. People used to have the choice to leave a door open, now they don't - but if its unlocked the loiterers will still push it open, of course they will. Now to confuse it further they've taken the lock off the mirror room door...so again, it just seems they don't really know what it is they want to do in there. It's worked well for 30 years and although the loitering is annoying it just needs to be policed. Going in the corridor doesn't expose a staff member to swinging, they might hear someone moaning but to be honest you can sometimes hear that from outside the area anyway. Or you make it strictly couples only to enter. Adding closers, taking away locks, it doesn't make sense. Nor does it stop what we usually get now, one single man per room on his own wasting his time waiting for something that isn't going to happen.  |
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"I agree too, however I also think the point that they want the swingers' money but don't really want them there is a good one. Also the rooms have always had locks on the doors, that wasn't the point - its these door closers they have put on that have caused the issue. People used to have the choice to leave a door open, now they don't - but if its unlocked the loiterers will still push it open, of course they will. Now to confuse it further they've taken the lock off the mirror room door...so again, it just seems they don't really know what it is they want to do in there. It's worked well for 30 years and although the loitering is annoying it just needs to be policed. Going in the corridor doesn't expose a staff member to swinging, they might hear someone moaning but to be honest you can sometimes hear that from outside the area anyway. Or you make it strictly couples only to enter. Adding closers, taking away locks, it doesn't make sense. Nor does it stop what we usually get now, one single man per room on his own wasting his time waiting for something that isn't going to happen. "
It's not a perfect solution and will no doubt be tweaked with.
They do occasionally open the door to tell the single men not to hang around, but they're usually too busy with normal operating of the spa and watching out for people who can't understand the "no play in the spa" rule.
We torment the single room squatters by going up, walking through and watching them perk up and get excited, then go back downstairs and wait for 6pm at the weekend when they have to leave.
They're trying their best, it might not be perfect or match everyone's idea of an ideal solution but they're doing their best and are open to suggestions. |
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They are trying to move the line away from Swingers venue to Naturist Spa venue but unfortunately by doing so are alienating the swingers. If they really want BGHS to be just a Naturist Spa then get rid of the playrooms and make it a Naturist Spa. It would be a loss to the swinging community but at least it will avoid the disappointment and frustration being felt at the minute.
Eventually the rules and attitude of BGHS management will drive away the two groups. Naturism and Swinging both celebrate and promote freedom of expression and any venue hosting these activities should have similar principles not rules, more rules and yet more rules. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"They are trying to move the line away from Swingers venue to Naturist Spa venue but unfortunately by doing so are alienating the swingers. If they really want BGHS to be just a Naturist Spa then get rid of the playrooms and make it a Naturist Spa. It would be a loss to the swinging community but at least it will avoid the disappointment and frustration being felt at the minute.
Eventually the rules and attitude of BGHS management will drive away the two groups. Naturism and Swinging both celebrate and promote freedom of expression and any venue hosting these activities should have similar principles not rules, more rules and yet more rules."
But they are not play rooms they are relaxation rooms, the owners allow people to play, this is the issue more and more people go assuming it as a swingers club, this effects people who want to use it for its primary purpose a spa. It's not nice being followed around because you are female or in a couple. |
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Bghs is a naturist spa who accept swingers as a fact of life, and yes they want their money or they will not make enough money to stay open.
It is my understanding that if a door is shut then the people inside do not require guests and knocking on a locked door is bad ettiquette and Opening a shut door is a serious offence.
It would seem to me that this is a case of single guys fucking it up for every one.
If a couple want company they will invite as many as they want, and who they want in.
A huge crowd of guys hanging around outside a door, ears pressed against it or constant knocking is very off putting.
Just because you are there doesn't mean anyone will play with you.
And before anyone starts about single guy bashing how many couples do you see hanging around the corridors trying to get into any/every room.
You will ruin it for yourselves if you don't listen. They are trying to keep you happy and not cause offence to the naturists, but if you push it you will loose out. And remember not everyone in the rooms wants to play.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Bghs is a naturist spa who accept swingers as a fact of life, and yes they want their money or they will not make enough money to stay open.
It is my understanding that if a door is shut then the people inside do not require guests and knocking on a locked door is bad ettiquette and Opening a shut door is a serious offence.
It would seem to me that this is a case of single guys fucking it up for every one.
If a couple want company they will invite as many as they want, and who they want in.
A huge crowd of guys hanging around outside a door, ears pressed against it or constant knocking is very off putting.
Just because you are there doesn't mean anyone will play with you.
And before anyone starts about single guy bashing how many couples do you see hanging around the corridors trying to get into any/every room.
You will ruin it for yourselves if you don't listen. They are trying to keep you happy and not cause offence to the naturists, but if you push it you will loose out. And remember not everyone in the rooms wants to play.
"
Exactly this, and if this was a swingers club then it wouldn't be on trip advisor!
The owners have been very kind to allow swingers to play on premises, but if people will insist on carry on this way then owners will stop it for all and everyone will lose out.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Bghs is a naturist spa who accept swingers as a fact of life, and yes they want their money or they will not make enough money to stay open.
It is my understanding that if a door is shut then the people inside do not require guests and knocking on a locked door is bad ettiquette and Opening a shut door is a serious offence.
It would seem to me that this is a case of single guys fucking it up for every one.
If a couple want company they will invite as many as they want, and who they want in.
A huge crowd of guys hanging around outside a door, ears pressed against it or constant knocking is very off putting.
Just because you are there doesn't mean anyone will play with you.
And before anyone starts about single guy bashing how many couples do you see hanging around the corridors trying to get into any/every room.
You will ruin it for yourselves if you don't listen. They are trying to keep you happy and not cause offence to the naturists, but if you push it you will loose out. And remember not everyone in the rooms wants to play.
Exactly this, and if this was a swingers club then it wouldn't be on trip advisor!
The owners have been very kind to allow swingers to play on premises, but if people will insist on carry on this way then owners will stop it for all and everyone will lose out.
"
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Then they need to police it which is what I said before. It's no use saying "they aren't swingers and don't want to see it" when they actually wouldn't have to by just going in the corridor, but it seems they want to have their cake and eat it - if you provide a facility then you need to also provide staff who are able to go in that facility and manage problem people. If you don't want to do that or feel you can't find decent staff who can handle such a thing, then maybe don't offer it at all and use the space for something else.
I also don't buy that the rooms are meant for relaxing, especially the mirror room! Who relaxes by lying there checking themselves out from every angle while a crowd stand in the alleyway gawping?! The relaxation area is on the top floor under the glass roof. |
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"Then they need to police it which is what I said before. It's no use saying "they aren't swingers and don't want to see it" when they actually wouldn't have to by just going in the corridor, but it seems they want to have their cake and eat it - if you provide a facility then you need to also provide staff who are able to go in that facility and manage problem people. If you don't want to do that or feel you can't find decent staff who can handle such a thing, then maybe don't offer it at all and use the space for something else.
I also don't buy that the rooms are meant for relaxing, especially the mirror room! Who relaxes by lying there checking themselves out from every angle while a crowd stand in the alleyway gawping?! The relaxation area is on the top floor under the glass roof."
I hadn't been to BGHS for a while and this thread was beginning to put me off ever returning. However I went last week and I am not sure what all the fuss is about??
Everything is exactly the same except the rooms on the corridor that can be seen from the glass door have "closers" on them. All the rooms out of site of the glass door do not have the closers. So now the guys who used to stand in the corridor wanking, do so round the corner and not in view of anyone looking through the glass door.
BGHS has always been a naturist venue that is swinger friendly. Whenever I have been over the years the attitude of the staff is tolerant, but does expect a level of respect. So whilst not a swinger venue, swinging happens and the staff to not interfere. The only exception is if the swinging is spoiling others enjoyment of the place. Among the things that are considered to spoil the experience for others is the site of blokes wanking in a corridor, or very loud noises that conflict with the tranquil atmosphere.
As for policing the situation? My vote would always go for mutual respect over draconian policing tactics. Policing by consent is how we do things in the UK, so why shouldn't it work in a naturist spa? The staff don't burst into rooms wearing SWAT jackets to apprehend miscreants, and hopefully the swingers can live with a situation that allows them to do what they want - so long as they don't offend others. Simples!
After a lovely afternoon in what is still the cleanest and best equipped spa in the UK, I remembered why I love BGHS. It's not just the facilities downstairs, it is the tolerance and respect that the staff show to everyone who is tolerant and respectful. |
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Disagree slightly as there aren't usually guys standing in the entrance area wanking - they just stand there. Either trying to listen what's going on behind a closed door, hoping to get called in or just waiting for people to come in. If in the past people using those rooms wanted the guys to watch and wank then obviously they'd let them go in the room, not make them standing outside and do it, so again I think the closers are a waste of time that just reduce choices for people wanting to use those rooms.
The other issue that still exists is the one man per room syndrome - having been pressured to ensure they don't stand in the entrance area you now get a guy sitting by himself in each room for hours on end, meaning couples coming in have less choice or availability and half the time turn around and go back out. Not sure how you control that but I don't think its with door closers.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Disagree slightly as there aren't usually guys standing in the entrance area wanking - they just stand there. Either trying to listen what's going on behind a closed door, hoping to get called in or just waiting for people to come in. If in the past people using those rooms wanted the guys to watch and wank then obviously they'd let them go in the room, not make them standing outside and do it, so again I think the closers are a waste of time that just reduce choices for people wanting to use those rooms.
The other issue that still exists is the one man per room syndrome - having been pressured to ensure they don't stand in the entrance area you now get a guy sitting by himself in each room for hours on end, meaning couples coming in have less choice or availability and half the time turn around and go back out. Not sure how you control that but I don't think its with door closers.
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We've never used the venue as a swingers club, but the single guys standing around the relax rooms have put us off using them for any reason. As for the one guy sitting in a room for hours on end maybe the answer is to stop any sexual activity full stop and just use the place as a spa. |
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"Disagree slightly as there aren't usually guys standing in the entrance area wanking - they just stand there. Either trying to listen what's going on behind a closed door, hoping to get called in or just waiting for people to come in. If in the past people using those rooms wanted the guys to watch and wank then obviously they'd let them go in the room, not make them standing outside and do it, so again I think the closers are a waste of time that just reduce choices for people wanting to use those rooms.
The other issue that still exists is the one man per room syndrome - having been pressured to ensure they don't stand in the entrance area you now get a guy sitting by himself in each room for hours on end, meaning couples coming in have less choice or availability and half the time turn around and go back out. Not sure how you control that but I don't think its with door closers.
"
Always interesting to hear other peoples experience.
I think the "one man per room" scenario is what I was referring to. The first couple of rooms could have a guy showing that he could achieve an erection (as this is easier than developing a personality) and trying to entice others to join him. Obviously this also required the door to be open for the display to work. The door closers have reduced this particular type of pop up ad. Seems that holding the door open with one foot is not conducive to wanking.
The other issue was the guys who were not invited to join anyone in a room. Perhaps because they needed to be discrete, they would sometimes stand outside the door to the first room and the mirror room watching and wanking. Once again the door closers have made this difficult.
Personally I like the idea that if you like an audience, or watching there is a space round the corner where you can play. If you like a sexy environment, but don't need others then this is catered for. Back to my initial posting, for me BGHS is about respecting others. |
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Now that I do more or less agree with! ("Pop up ad" )
The problem now is that you can't see if there is a man in the room until you open the door, at which point you'd be fully availed of his personality replacement rather than being able to see from the corridor that this is a room to pass by.
I think they could do away with the swinging except maybe on the couples only nights or something. Just lock the rest room area the rest of the time - but no doubt that would mean fewer customers. There is no perfect solution I guess, other than we need the culture to change here so that naturist spas are seen as normal and non-sexual, then you can have venues that cater for swingers and venues for spa goers like they do in Holland, Germany etc.
At Zuiver in Amsterdam it was probably two-thirds women of all ages, and it was really busy - because their culture says that is normal. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" other than we need the culture to change here so that naturist spas are seen as normal and non-sexual, then you can have venues that cater for swingers and venues for spa goers like they do in Holland, Germany etc.
At Zuiver in Amsterdam it was probably two-thirds women of all ages, and it was really busy - because their culture says that is normal. "
I think the only issues here is as you say it's their culture, having seen how new swingers clubs get complaints from local residents I can't see many swinging spas getting very popular. It's a shame as there is nothing better than being able to bathe nude. |
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