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Chams Saturday - people keeping to themselves?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I attended Chams for the first time on Saturday (with kitten) - we met some really nice people and had lots of fun, so no complaints. But we noticed it was less.. I dunno, social? Than other clubs we'd been to. People seemed less interested in talking, except a couple of big groups.
Was this an off night? Is chams generally like this? Is there a secret handshake we don't know? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I attended Chams for the first time on Saturday (with kitten) - we met some really nice people and had lots of fun, so no complaints. But we noticed it was less.. I dunno, social? Than other clubs we'd been to. People seemed less interested in talking, except a couple of big groups.
Was this an off night? Is chams generally like this? Is there a secret handshake we don't know?"
We also went on saturday and by 11 went back to our room .
Was very disappointed , apart from our feuds we went there to meet nobody seemed interested in keeping a convo going and it wasnt for the want of trying as I would talk the legs off anyone  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I attended Chams for the first time on Saturday (with kitten) - we met some really nice people and had lots of fun, so no complaints. But we noticed it was less.. I dunno, social? Than other clubs we'd been to. People seemed less interested in talking, except a couple of big groups.
Was this an off night? Is chams generally like this? Is there a secret handshake we don't know?
We also went on saturday and by 11 went back to our room .
Was very disappointed , apart from our feuds we went there to meet nobody seemed interested in keeping a convo going and it wasnt for the want of trying as I would talk the legs off anyone "
Meant friends not feuds haha |
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By *ady23Woman
over a year ago
Coventry |
"I attended Chams for the first time on Saturday (with kitten) - we met some really nice people and had lots of fun, so no complaints. But we noticed it was less.. I dunno, social? Than other clubs we'd been to. People seemed less interested in talking, except a couple of big groups.
Was this an off night? Is chams generally like this? Is there a secret handshake we don't know?"
We've been going on Saturday during the afternoon to be fair. Tried the Saturday evening in the past and other nights. Considering naked Tuesday at some point |
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"I attended Chams for the first time on Saturday (with kitten) - we met some really nice people and had lots of fun, so no complaints. But we noticed it was less.. I dunno, social? Than other clubs we'd been to. People seemed less interested in talking, except a couple of big groups.
Was this an off night? Is chams generally like this? Is there a secret handshake we don't know?
We also went on saturday and by 11 went back to our room .
Was very disappointed , apart from our feuds we went there to meet nobody seemed interested in keeping a convo going and it wasnt for the want of trying as I would talk the legs off anyone
Meant friends not feuds haha"
We also took a road trip up with these and was very disappointed.
No one spoke unless you knew them.
Saturdays aren't for us we would of had much more fun at Newport chams  |
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"Unless you are a regular all clubs have their own groups of people who know each other.
Very very true. "
All clubs we go we find the bar the best to chat and meet people. People don't speak without eye contact, interaction etc but to stand to one side and expect people to come over is going to exclude. Smokers have their own social outside in smoking area hence we find big divide there being non smokers ourselves. Chams is huge and you need to walk round as there are a fair few social spots, busdtop, sofas by changing room etc and of course disco. We like to mix and make connections, find that some couples in clubs don't talk but follow us hoping we'll go in room and they merely join in, especially in clubs abroad. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Chams is huge and you need to walk round as there are a fair few social spots, busdtop, sofas by changing room etc and of course disco. "
Our interactions were all while playing/hanging around up at the "dungeon" area, weirdly enough. Obviously more interesting when at work..
The disco was godawful enough from the outside  |
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"Chams is huge and you need to walk round as there are a fair few social spots, busdtop, sofas by changing room etc and of course disco.
Our interactions were all while playing/hanging around up at the "dungeon" area, weirdly enough. Obviously more interesting when at work..
The disco was godawful enough from the outside "
Showoff lol. We've had lots fun in disco |
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We've always noticed a bit of this at Chams, but we've never failed to make new friends. Groups are understandable when you think about it. It's very hard for a couple to find other people (especially other couples) you play well with and have mutual attraction for everyone. So it's only natural when you find people you click with your going to want to do keep building on it and doing it again. So don't have no problem with people having their own groups. And also lots of people are simply just shy. So there are very much in their comfort zone with people they know, but not forth coming with new people they don't. Personally we're not group people, we're misfits and social butterflies. |
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We found Saturday nights very unsocial when we tried to make a conversation we were just ignored with one of those smiles that just says fuck off we don't want to chat? and we are the biggest chat slags around ,we also went back to our room by 22:00.Sundays are totally different though with a much better mix of people |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’s so sad the lack of social skills in a lot of adults at clubs really, it’s like a teenage disco from childhood at times, everyone waiting for other people to make a move, really is tedious.
Chams we’ve found to be better than most clubs in terms of friendly clientele |
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From our experience, and we’ve been regulars at Chams and also other clubs. You can have nights at all clubs, where there are clearly groups who know each other. But it’s isn’t always the case every time, I think it’s no different from a vanilla club, same club but some nights just more fun, friendly or whatever depending on who there. I certainly wouldn’t say Chams is more clique than any others. In fact we found XTASIA tends to be the one with more groups.
Equally think people have to accept that it is a swingers club, and while we have no issue in being friendly with anyone, there is always that issue that if you get into too much of a conversation with someone, they might see it you are interested in playing with them, rather than just being sociable. So it may be that sometimes people aren’t keen to chat with you because you just not their cup of tea when it comes to swinging, and it’s sometimes bit hard to say hi how are you, but by the way I’ve got no insterest in playing with you...without that equally being rude! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We avoid the club on Saturdays as find it to be really clique. Last time we went on a Saturday we left by 10am. We love Sundays and Mondays though. "
mondays are fun |
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By *jonesMan
over a year ago
Totnes |
"From our experience, and we’ve been regulars at Chams and also other clubs. You can have nights at all clubs, where there are clearly groups who know each other. But it’s isn’t always the case every time, I think it’s no different from a vanilla club, same club but some nights just more fun, friendly or whatever depending on who there. I certainly wouldn’t say Chams is more clique than any others. In fact we found XTASIA tends to be the one with more groups.
Equally think people have to accept that it is a swingers club, and while we have no issue in being friendly with anyone, there is always that issue that if you get into too much of a conversation with someone, they might see it you are interested in playing with them, rather than just being sociable. So it may be that sometimes people aren’t keen to chat with you because you just not their cup of tea when it comes to swinging, and it’s sometimes bit hard to say hi how are you, but by the way I’ve got no insterest in playing with you...without that equally being rude!"
I think this comment is exactly why couples tend to be less sociable than singles, in general..singles will obviously be thinking about whether someone is attractive to them and the potential for play ..but I think it's less of a factor...for me anyway... |
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"From our experience, and we’ve been regulars at Chams and also other clubs. You can have nights at all clubs, where there are clearly groups who know each other. But it’s isn’t always the case every time, I think it’s no different from a vanilla club, same club but some nights just more fun, friendly or whatever depending on who there. I certainly wouldn’t say Chams is more clique than any others. In fact we found XTASIA tends to be the one with more groups.
Equally think people have to accept that it is a swingers club, and while we have no issue in being friendly with anyone, there is always that issue that if you get into too much of a conversation with someone, they might see it you are interested in playing with them, rather than just being sociable. So it may be that sometimes people aren’t keen to chat with you because you just not their cup of tea when it comes to swinging, and it’s sometimes bit hard to say hi how are you, but by the way I’ve got no insterest in playing with you...without that equally being rude!
I think this comment is exactly why couples tend to be less sociable than singles, in general..singles will obviously be thinking about whether someone is attractive to them and the potential for play ..but I think it's less of a factor...for me anyway..."
Singles tend to be more sociable, because they’re there by themselves, and actively looking for others to engage with. Couples just sit back, thinking if nobody speaks to us, we’ve got each other to chat to....... |
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By *ady23Woman
over a year ago
Coventry |
"We have been going for 5 years or so, and can honestly say in that we have never found it clicky at all ,more the opposite but , a clubs only as good as the people who are there on the night  "
So true weve had amazing nights and quieter ones. Depends who's there and how u feel on the night |
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"We have been going for 5 years or so, and can honestly say in that we have never found it clicky at all ,more the opposite but , a clubs only as good as the people who are there on the night "
Exactly this! Any club is just bricks and mortar, fixtures and fittings, what makes the experience is who is there while you are |
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"We have been going for 5 years or so, and can honestly say in that we have never found it clicky at all ,more the opposite but , a clubs only as good as the people who are there on the night
Exactly this! Any club is just bricks and mortar, fixtures and fittings, what makes the experience is who is there while you are "
Thank you guys I'm sure your all going to.make me welcome...im a friendly girl and the social is what I go for not the sex that's just a bonus if it happens |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
Here is what i tend to find when going to clubs...
if "everyone" waits on "someone" to do something..... "nothing" will get done!!!
people waiting on other people... no one want to make 1st moves, ect ect ect....
me.... i'm an equal oppotunity gobshite and quite frankly i'll talk to anybody......
don't want to talk... not on me!
shunkeye if i say hi.... not on me!
too many followers... not enough leaders! |
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By *asha86Couple
over a year ago
walsall |
We went on Saturday night for the first time we met some really lovely people there! Yes there are people who dont want to interact with you but we enjoyed the relaxed atmosphere and are certainly looking at going again!
The jacuzzi is a good place to go to get chatting  |
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By *argarineCouple
over a year ago
Cradley Heath |
We never stay on a Saturday evening. If you're not in the in crowd you can expect to be ignored and I even experienced this as a single female on the scene.
Try other nights- much more friendly and open to all. |
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By *ady23Woman
over a year ago
Coventry |
"We never stay on a Saturday evening. If you're not in the in crowd you can expect to be ignored and I even experienced this as a single female on the scene.
Try other nights- much more friendly and open to all."
More recently we were going other times too |
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The difference is i can see the club you go is small looks like it were a terraced house before becoming a club.
chams is based on 3 floors but not the size of a terraced house chams has x2 spas a sauna and a steam room it's a club that can hold around 120 couples on saturday night there is the difference small club v huge club chams saturday night staff 8 + security on car park a+e max 3 staff.
so when you are in a large club people can choose who they want to chat to. |
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By *ittleMissCaliWoman
over a year ago
trouble most likely, or creating it :) |
"We never stay on a Saturday evening. If you're not in the in crowd you can expect to be ignored and I even experienced this as a single female on the scene.
Try other nights- much more friendly and open to all."
I will agree with this on a Saturday evening. I prefer Sunday days/ evenings or fridays x |
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All nights are different - just the same as a local pub or other club. And yes some times larger groups who know each other may be there on the night you go, again like any club. But we have never found that if you started chatting they wouldn’t talk also. we are not overly confident people that just initiate conversation, but we certainly found that if you get up and dance on the dance floor upstairs , you’ll soon be chatting (and probably something else) or get on the round bed or couples room or jacuzzi, the conversation will flow. The downstairs bar area is good also for talking.
I really wouldn’t say chams is any more “clicky” than any of the other clubs and it’s not just the day of the week but who has turned up that week. I think because there are so many areas to chams also, and open areas, it’s easier to stumble or get involved in fun. Unlike Xtasia that we’ve often found to be clicky and then everyone locks themselves in locked rooms because there isn’t many open areas to play and because everyone is still fully dressed. |
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One of the things putting us off going to charms on a Saturday is that it has cliques people don’t talk to new people...meet a pre organised group.
Prefer fridays when it’s a little bit busier & chaotic |
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By *eaMonkeysCouple
over a year ago
South Manchester |
"I attended Chams for the first time on Saturday (with kitten) - we met some really nice people and had lots of fun, so no complaints. But we noticed it was less.. I dunno, social? Than other clubs we'd been to. People seemed less interested in talking, except a couple of big groups.
Was this an off night? Is chams generally like this? Is there a secret handshake we don't know?"
We went last night and found everyone really nice and happy to talk. I’m sure we would have chatted to you if we were around each other |
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By *icknHMan
over a year ago
Ilfracombe |
"From our experience, and we’ve been regulars at Chams and also other clubs. You can have nights at all clubs, where there are clearly groups who know each other. But it’s isn’t always the case every time, I think it’s no different from a vanilla club, same club but some nights just more fun, friendly or whatever depending on who there. I certainly wouldn’t say Chams is more clique than any others. In fact we found XTASIA tends to be the one with more groups.
Equally think people have to accept that it is a swingers club, and while we have no issue in being friendly with anyone, there is always that issue that if you get into too much of a conversation with someone, they might see it you are interested in playing with them, rather than just being sociable. So it may be that sometimes people aren’t keen to chat with you because you just not their cup of tea when it comes to swinging, and it’s sometimes bit hard to say hi how are you, but by the way I’ve got no insterest in playing with you...without that equally being rude!"
This. Spot on... |
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"We haven’t been to chams yet (reading on here we might try a Sunday) but we also found xtasia very clicky"
Sunday’s can be a good night - quieter and of course singles allowed. We went on a Sunday a few weeks ago.
But Saturdays really don’t have a clique going on - just like any club if a bunch of people who know each other decide to go that night, yes you will see them together, but that could be equally any club and any night, doesn’t equally mean they won’t talk to you, and will be plenty of other couples who aren’t part of the group. Another night it could be just full of couples that have never met before.
Of the two clubs, we found Xtasia more clicky and part of that is the layout, it’s easy for groups to congregate and take over areas. Chams layout makes it impossible for them to take over, as there so many floors and areas/rooms.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've not been on a Saturday so can't comment on that. But in general when I've been on a friday night or a sunday I've found it really social. Had some long conversations with people and no pressure to play. It might be a Saturday thing or just a off night. |
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If you’re finding any particular night cliquey... start your own clique.
Cliques can happen at any club, particularly if there is a birthday party or something going on. But when that happens we’ve normally found a few people there who like us weren’t part of the party and are relieved to talk to someone lol.
The only thing worse than not playing in a club is not talking, or attempting to talk, to anyone. |
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I really enjoy Chams, always going with a lady. The only time I felt disappointed was on a Saturday. Lots of people obviously arrange to meet up.there and understandably decide to stay together.
Also it has more of an 'event' feel to it. Women make a real effort to dress to impress, but this is less conducive to getting into the jacuzzi, which is where we mostly get to know people.
Also, it's more expensive on a Saturday night which might put some off. |
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It’s a mixed bag really. We hadn’t been in over a year and had a great time.
Yes some people keep within their group so to say, but we met and talked to loads of other people and everyone we did speak to was lovely. Great atmosphere.
Only sad thing about Saturday was a sexy lady commented on my hair when we came in and I couldn’t find her again as it was SO busy  |
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By *E8374Couple
over a year ago
Tipton |
"We went on Saturday night for the first time we met some really lovely people there! Yes there are people who dont want to interact with you but we enjoyed the relaxed atmosphere and are certainly looking at going again!
The jacuzzi is a good place to go to get chatting "
This .... We find the Jacuzzi a great place to talk and meet people...
We prefer Monday's at chams, a lot more relaxed and open. Couples only night can be clicky in general wherever you go, but for us, it's a night out and we will always have fun, even if no one wants to join in with us.... But not often the latter happens
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Not been for a while and usually visited on Fridays but we also noticed that a lot of people just knew each other and were not much interested.
What we also noticed was that men’s age was typically well over 50.
Not sure what happened with Chams. It was the best place for us, but due to the distance we visited it once a month.
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By *itch269Couple
over a year ago
Horley |
We have been regulars over the last few years on Monday nights and some daytimes but gave the Saturdays a try a couple of times and were very disappointed as it seemed to be a talking shop with lots of people just parading around and not playing. It's the best club in the country if you go on the right days which is Monday for us x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I attended Chams for the first time on Saturday (with kitten) - we met some really nice people and had lots of fun, so no complaints. But we noticed it was less.. I dunno, social? Than other clubs we'd been to. People seemed less interested in talking, except a couple of big groups.
Was this an off night? Is chams generally like this? Is there a secret handshake we don't know?
We've been going on Saturday during the afternoon to be fair. Tried the Saturday evening in the past and other nights. Considering naked Tuesday at some point"
Tuesday nights are the best nights at chameleons. |
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By *argarineCouple
over a year ago
Cradley Heath |
"We avoid the club on Saturdays as find it to be really clique. Last time we went on a Saturday we left by 10am. We love Sundays and Mondays though. "
We love the place but don't tend to go on Saturdays. |
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By *ervertsCouple
over a year ago
halesowen |
We’re going tonight (Darlaston) and will be chatting to anyone and everyone like we always do, been going there regularly for years now and can remember people saying it was cliquey back when we first started going, but we’ve never found it cliquey at all. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Think it was post Christmas blues. Were heading up there this Saturday. Lots of regulars returning. Don't be out off, it's normally very well attended. Usually 80 couples minimum. X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I attended Chams for the first time on Saturday (with kitten) - we met some really nice people and had lots of fun, so no complaints. But we noticed it was less.. I dunno, social? Than other clubs we'd been to. People seemed less interested in talking, except a couple of big groups.
Was this an off night? Is chams generally like this? Is there a secret handshake we don't know?
We've been going on Saturday during the afternoon to be fair. Tried the Saturday evening in the past and other nights. Considering naked Tuesday at some point"
I find Tuesday nights the best, very liberating!!! |
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