FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Club Discussion > Clubs trying to host a social?
Clubs trying to host a social?
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By *arlo82 OP Woman
over a year ago
the gym and random places |
Wondering peoples thoughts?
Socials esp large scale ones to me are for those who want to meet like minded people in a pressure free environment.
Some genuinely dont want to attend a club.....however its come to my attention that one in particular is trying to host socials (mainly to benefit financially)
What's majority of peoples views?
Keep socials as a separate entity or associate it with club scene? |
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By *eordiesCouple
over a year ago
newcastle |
It depends on the club.
Somewhere like Xtasia could easy hold a social in it's bar area (a separate building to the main club). Then those that wanted to play could go into the main club.
Don't think it would work in small clubs tho. |
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By *arlo82 OP Woman
over a year ago
the gym and random places |
"A club is a business concern, so why shouldn't it benefit financially?"
Socials aren't there to generate profit. People all over UK host socials to benefit the scene not turn a quick buck |
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The clue is in the name a social is a social!! Its the best way to dip your toe into the scene!
Or for me it’s were I get to see friends av met from further a field!
Adding a club visit is too much pressure for newbies who lets face it take a good 2 or 3 times to even build up the courage to attend!
If people want to go to a club afterwards so be it but shouldn’t mix the two events as they too totally different things!! |
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By *arlo82 OP Woman
over a year ago
the gym and random places |
"It depends on the club.
Somewhere like Xtasia could easy hold a social in it's bar area (a separate building to the main club). Then those that wanted to play could go into the main club.
Don't think it would work in small clubs tho."
In a club size of xtasia yes, as you said separate building which is ideal |
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"A club is a business concern, so why shouldn't it benefit financially?
Socials aren't there to generate profit. People all over UK host socials to benefit the scene not turn a quick buck"
So when a social is held in a pub/bar or regular club the owner gives the room for free, doesn't expect the attendees to buy drinks from the bar, the organisers to order a buffet from them?
I think socials at a club are a good idea.
The club on the night usually waives membership fees as long as you are on the guest list. Which is a bonus as they can be expensive if you are curious but don't want to blow a fair chunk of change on something you may find isn't for you. You can find out if what you have heard about swingers clubs is true or not, does it live upto your expectations or fears.
It gives those who wish to dip their toes into the club scene an opening to do just that. Those who have no wish to ever set foot in a club can easily avoid them by going to one of the many other socials which aren't hosted in a club.
There is room for all. |
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All socials need a venue and sometimes it’s difficult to find somewhere suitable so a club is a good option. I’ve seen two clubs do socials. I think one is free 7-10 and you pay if you want to stay later which seems fair. It’s also a safe/cheap way to see the club before you try it for a play event. |
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I can see no problem at all with clubs hosting socials.
They work the same as any other. Free entry and the chance to meet likeminded people. Play rooms are not available only the social area.
There's the option to pay and play later in many cases, but not always.
I actually think that it is a great way to introduce newbies to the scene. |
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"All socials need a venue and sometimes it’s difficult to find somewhere suitable so a club is a good option. I’ve seen two clubs do socials. I think one is free 7-10 and you pay if you want to stay later which seems fair. It’s also a safe/cheap way to see the club before you try it for a play event. "
Free entry (if you’re on the guest list) 7-10 is a great idea, especially for the single guys who are curious about the club scene, but put off by extortionate gender disparity. How many times in the forums and status updates do you see people complaining about a lack of single guys in clubs, and usually from single women who pay £0 entry fees......? |
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Our first social was in a club and wasn't a social at all...nobody was sociable and all disappeared downstairs to play including the hosts, it very nearly put us off clubs and socials altogether.
I think it depends very much on the hosts and the clarity of expectations about any social. People get the wrong end of the stick all the time. When a friend hosted socials in pubs, she got constantly asked if there would be play. I don't think the venue matters, it's the calibre of the hosts that really matters |
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"All socials need a venue and sometimes it’s difficult to find somewhere suitable so a club is a good option. I’ve seen two clubs do socials. I think one is free 7-10 and you pay if you want to stay later which seems fair. It’s also a safe/cheap way to see the club before you try it for a play event.
Free entry (if you’re on the guest list) 7-10 is a great idea, especially for the single guys who are curious about the club scene, but put off by extortionate gender disparity. How many times in the forums and status updates do you see people complaining about a lack of single guys in clubs, and usually from single women who pay £0 entry fees......?"
Actually, it is more likely that women complain about too many single guys, who just follow you about. Many clubs have very reasonable prices for men. |
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"All socials need a venue and sometimes it’s difficult to find somewhere suitable so a club is a good option. I’ve seen two clubs do socials. I think one is free 7-10 and you pay if you want to stay later which seems fair. It’s also a safe/cheap way to see the club before you try it for a play event.
Free entry (if you’re on the guest list) 7-10 is a great idea, especially for the single guys who are curious about the club scene, but put off by extortionate gender disparity. How many times in the forums and status updates do you see people complaining about a lack of single guys in clubs, and usually from single women who pay £0 entry fees......?
Actually, it is more likely that women complain about too many single guys, who just follow you about. Many clubs have very reasonable prices for men."
Yeah I've never been at a club with not enough guys.
Not enough guys with manners... That's another story. |
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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago
hiding from cock pics. |
I think it is a really good idea and I have no issue at all with clubs that want to host socials (even if they hope it might generate income if people decide to return to the club).
As with everything, people have the power to decide whether to attend or not and can vote with their feet.
Personally I would attend a club asocial just as much (or maybe more) as I would attend a social elsewhere. |
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"All socials need a venue and sometimes it’s difficult to find somewhere suitable so a club is a good option. I’ve seen two clubs do socials. I think one is free 7-10 and you pay if you want to stay later which seems fair. It’s also a safe/cheap way to see the club before you try it for a play event.
Free entry (if you’re on the guest list) 7-10 is a great idea, especially for the single guys who are curious about the club scene, but put off by extortionate gender disparity. How many times in the forums and status updates do you see people complaining about a lack of single guys in clubs, and usually from single women who pay £0 entry fees......?
Actually, it is more likely that women complain about too many single guys, who just follow you about. Many clubs have very reasonable prices for men.
Yeah I've never been at a club with not enough guys.
Not enough guys with manners... That's another story. "
Over the festive period, I noticed a status post from (admittedly an event host) staying “Where are all the single guys? I have 10 hot single women in the club looking for company?” I also noted women on the run-up to NYE trying to attract single guys in to one particular club; they seemed amazed more guys wouldn’t pay £35 entry as opposed to them getting in for free...... |
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"All socials need a venue and sometimes it’s difficult to find somewhere suitable so a club is a good option. I’ve seen two clubs do socials. I think one is free 7-10 and you pay if you want to stay later which seems fair. It’s also a safe/cheap way to see the club before you try it for a play event.
Free entry (if you’re on the guest list) 7-10 is a great idea, especially for the single guys who are curious about the club scene, but put off by extortionate gender disparity. How many times in the forums and status updates do you see people complaining about a lack of single guys in clubs, and usually from single women who pay £0 entry fees......?
Actually, it is more likely that women complain about too many single guys, who just follow you about. Many clubs have very reasonable prices for men.
Yeah I've never been at a club with not enough guys.
Not enough guys with manners... That's another story.
Over the festive period, I noticed a status post from (admittedly an event host) staying “Where are all the single guys? I have 10 hot single women in the club looking for company?” I also noted women on the run-up to NYE trying to attract single guys in to one particular club; they seemed amazed more guys wouldn’t pay £35 entry as opposed to them getting in for free......"
I cynically wonder if that was just an attempt to get more money through the door rather than anything factual.
I'm not a host or club staff, and I've never seen a situation where numerically guys are too few. |
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"A club is a business concern, so why shouldn't it benefit financially?
Socials aren't there to generate profit. People all over UK host socials to benefit the scene not turn a quick buck"
This. I admit I often send a bucket round at my socials and donate to a charity of someone’s choice.
Let’s be real, it’s NEVER a social in a club is it? There’s always play... it’s just another night at the club.... |
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"A club is a business concern, so why shouldn't it benefit financially?
Socials aren't there to generate profit. People all over UK host socials to benefit the scene not turn a quick buck
This. I admit I often send a bucket round at my socials and donate to a charity of someone’s choice.
Let’s be real, it’s NEVER a social in a club is it? There’s always play... it’s just another night at the club...."
And thats why in my opinion it should be separate!x |
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"All socials need a venue and sometimes it’s difficult to find somewhere suitable so a club is a good option. I’ve seen two clubs do socials. I think one is free 7-10 and you pay if you want to stay later which seems fair. It’s also a safe/cheap way to see the club before you try it for a play event.
Free entry (if you’re on the guest list) 7-10 is a great idea, especially for the single guys who are curious about the club scene, but put off by extortionate gender disparity. How many times in the forums and status updates do you see people complaining about a lack of single guys in clubs, and usually from single women who pay £0 entry fees......?
Actually, it is more likely that women complain about too many single guys, who just follow you about. Many clubs have very reasonable prices for men.
Yeah I've never been at a club with not enough guys.
Not enough guys with manners... That's another story.
Over the festive period, I noticed a status post from (admittedly an event host) staying “Where are all the single guys? I have 10 hot single women in the club looking for company?” I also noted women on the run-up to NYE trying to attract single guys in to one particular club; they seemed amazed more guys wouldn’t pay £35 entry as opposed to them getting in for free......
I cynically wonder if that was just an attempt to get more money through the door rather than anything factual.
I'm not a host or club staff, and I've never seen a situation where numerically guys are too few. "
I’m sure it was click-bait too 
I was in a club very recently, where I was one of only four single guys in. It was a fancy dress party event, and filled with couples embracing the theme, but staying in their little groups. I got chatting with a couple at the bar, the wife was keen to chat, but hubby stood between us, his back turned to me and one arm firmly against the bar, so I knew my presence wasn’t welcome. I left soon after, as it was clearly a couples for couples only night, and explained why there were so few single guys in. I will also know to avoid similar events there in future |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A club is a business concern, so why shouldn't it benefit financially?
Socials aren't there to generate profit. People all over UK host socials to benefit the scene not turn a quick buck"
clubs there to make a profit there the business side of the Swinging scene without clubs it would be not very good in my opinion. That said really I think socials should be be in in none swinging environment so there would be less pressure on people. |
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"A club is a business concern, so why shouldn't it benefit financially?
Socials aren't there to generate profit. People all over UK host socials to benefit the scene not turn a quick buck"
So why are all the socials on forums asking for entry fees for socials? To meet costs and I do believe some are benefiting from them so why shouldn't clubs ? |
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By *arlo82 OP Woman
over a year ago
the gym and random places |
"A club is a business concern, so why shouldn't it benefit financially?
Socials aren't there to generate profit. People all over UK host socials to benefit the scene not turn a quick buck
So why are all the socials on forums asking for entry fees for socials? To meet costs and I do believe some are benefiting from them so why shouldn't clubs ? "
Big difference between £5 to cover cost of hiring a venue as opposed to £15+ where play is normally expected in a club |
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"A club is a business concern, so why shouldn't it benefit financially?
Socials aren't there to generate profit. People all over UK host socials to benefit the scene not turn a quick buck
So why are all the socials on forums asking for entry fees for socials? To meet costs and I do believe some are benefiting from them so why shouldn't clubs ?
Big difference between £5 to cover cost of hiring a venue as opposed to £15+ where play is normally expected in a club "
Most clubs is bring your own beer still cheaper than paying pub prices  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When I used to host socials locally was good fun but found it hard to find the right location such as pub or pub with function room. But then do you go on to after if people wanted to play. May have to pay for said function room. Was easier to move it to tease 2. Used to love this place x |
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"All socials need a venue and sometimes it’s difficult to find somewhere suitable so a club is a good option. I’ve seen two clubs do socials. I think one is free 7-10 and you pay if you want to stay later which seems fair. It’s also a safe/cheap way to see the club before you try it for a play event.
Free entry (if you’re on the guest list) 7-10 is a great idea, especially for the single guys who are curious about the club scene, but put off by extortionate gender disparity. How many times in the forums and status updates do you see people complaining about a lack of single guys in clubs, and usually from single women who pay £0 entry fees......?
Actually, it is more likely that women complain about too many single guys, who just follow you about. Many clubs have very reasonable prices for men.
Yeah I've never been at a club with not enough guys.
Not enough guys with manners... That's another story.
Over the festive period, I noticed a status post from (admittedly an event host) staying “Where are all the single guys? I have 10 hot single women in the club looking for company?” I also noted women on the run-up to NYE trying to attract single guys in to one particular club; they seemed amazed more guys wouldn’t pay £35 entry as opposed to them getting in for free......"
I posted something not dissimilar for my HU9 fet night - we did have a huge amount of single ladies coming and very few guys. For the fet night it’s parity pricing, most fetish events are the same with a few exceptions - many Kinksters actively choose not to attend events with gendered pricing |
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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago
Stoke area |
"A club is a business concern, so why shouldn't it benefit financially?
Socials aren't there to generate profit. People all over UK host socials to benefit the scene not turn a quick buck
This. I admit I often send a bucket round at my socials and donate to a charity of someone’s choice.
Let’s be real, it’s NEVER a social in a club is it? There’s always play... it’s just another night at the club....
And thats why in my opinion it should be separate!x"
My local club, Atlantis in Stoke hosted a great social. Free entry and on a seperate night from normal club night and no playing allowed. It meant people could look around the club and find out more, at the same time as getting the chance to meet some of the regulars and meet lots of new people.
Anyone wanting to return to the club within the next few weeks had the membership fees waived. Good publicity for the club and great for nervous newbies.
Plenty of space, so no waiting lists and people disappointed because they couldn't go, which has happened to me recently.  |
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As a so called newbie I have recently attended my first club night and although I was nervous to start, it was plainly clear that the night I was there the clientele were mostly single men. Maybe because it was the Friday before Xmas. But I think a social should be just that, a social, if you meet someone that floats your boat at the event you can always arrange something, it doesn’t have too be at the venue. |
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I was co-host to Fabnorth social in York. We put on socials which were free to attend and also raised money for charity.
If you're bringing 100+ customers into a pub the licensee will usually be only to pleased to waive any room hire charge.
Socials don't need entertainment, that just distracts from socialising.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A club is a business concern, so why shouldn't it benefit financially?
Socials aren't there to generate profit. People all over UK host socials to benefit the scene not turn a quick buck"
I organise the local social... I would say, there hasn't been one where someone doesn't make a decent wedge of cash out of it... Tbh at least with a club, said cash, would still be part of the scene, no? |
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By *umpkinMan
over a year ago
near the sounds of the wimborne quarter jack! |
"I was co-host to Fabnorth social in York. We put on socials which were free to attend and also raised money for charity.
If you're bringing 100+ customers into a pub the licensee will usually be only to pleased to waive any room hire charge.
Socials don't need entertainment, that just distracts from socialising.
"
It was just such socials like this that brought me into swinging. The swinger`s forum I used to use would have almost one a month somewhere in the country and they used to be eagerly awaited. But they also took some organising, finding a venue willing to host a closed event, arranging a DJ, having hotels nearby, onsite if possible and keeping the guest list up together. Loads of work but great fun in a totally safe environment and with no pressure to play (unless you got lucky and got an invite back to the hotel!) it made it a great introduction to swinging. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was co-host to Fabnorth social in York. We put on socials which were free to attend and also raised money for charity.
If you're bringing 100+ customers into a pub the licensee will usually be only to pleased to waive any room hire charge.
Socials don't need entertainment, that just distracts from socialising.
It was just such socials like this that brought me into swinging. The swinger`s forum I used to use would have almost one a month somewhere in the country and they used to be eagerly awaited. But they also took some organising, finding a venue willing to host a closed event, arranging a DJ, having hotels nearby, onsite if possible and keeping the guest list up together. Loads of work but great fun in a totally safe environment and with no pressure to play (unless you got lucky and got an invite back to the hotel!) it made it a great introduction to swinging."
Sod that! It's hard enough just organising one in a local pub! |
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Depends how it’s run.
Townhouse host the Wirral Munch, which is a social for the fet scene. It’s free entry, the bar is open but the playrooms are not. If people want to come in & pay entry to play, they can but it rarely happens.
It is a very social event, and is great fun. It also means that you’re not looking over your shoulder while discussing certain things.
I’ve been to a social in a pub where the room we were in was also where the door to the smoking area was. By the end of the night, a chap asked if were Swingers, because they had overheard bits of conversation 
If events are run on the basis that the play rooms are closed and it is purely as a social - like the munch - then I don’t see why it wouldn’t work  |
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"All socials need a venue and sometimes it’s difficult to find somewhere suitable so a club is a good option. I’ve seen two clubs do socials. I think one is free 7-10 and you pay if you want to stay later which seems fair. It’s also a safe/cheap way to see the club before you try it for a play event.
Free entry (if you’re on the guest list) 7-10 is a great idea, especially for the single guys who are curious about the club scene, but put off by extortionate gender disparity. How many times in the forums and status updates do you see people complaining about a lack of single guys in clubs, and usually from single women who pay £0 entry fees......?
Actually, it is more likely that women complain about too many single guys, who just follow you about. Many clubs have very reasonable prices for men.
Yeah I've never been at a club with not enough guys.
Not enough guys with manners... That's another story.
Over the festive period, I noticed a status post from (admittedly an event host) staying “Where are all the single guys? I have 10 hot single women in the club looking for company?” I also noted women on the run-up to NYE trying to attract single guys in to one particular club; they seemed amazed more guys wouldn’t pay £35 entry as opposed to them getting in for free......
I posted something not dissimilar for my HU9 fet night - we did have a huge amount of single ladies coming and very few guys. For the fet night it’s parity pricing, most fetish events are the same with a few exceptions - many Kinksters actively choose not to attend events with gendered pricing "
It's not an urban myth then? That saying you often hear in clubs; "You should have been here last week, the place was packed with single women!"  |
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"All socials need a venue and sometimes it’s difficult to find somewhere suitable so a club is a good option. I’ve seen two clubs do socials. I think one is free 7-10 and you pay if you want to stay later which seems fair. It’s also a safe/cheap way to see the club before you try it for a play event.
Free entry (if you’re on the guest list) 7-10 is a great idea, especially for the single guys who are curious about the club scene, but put off by extortionate gender disparity. How many times in the forums and status updates do you see people complaining about a lack of single guys in clubs, and usually from single women who pay £0 entry fees......?
Actually, it is more likely that women complain about too many single guys, who just follow you about. Many clubs have very reasonable prices for men.
Yeah I've never been at a club with not enough guys.
Not enough guys with manners... That's another story.
Over the festive period, I noticed a status post from (admittedly an event host) staying “Where are all the single guys? I have 10 hot single women in the club looking for company?” I also noted women on the run-up to NYE trying to attract single guys in to one particular club; they seemed amazed more guys wouldn’t pay £35 entry as opposed to them getting in for free......
I posted something not dissimilar for my HU9 fet night - we did have a huge amount of single ladies coming and very few guys. For the fet night it’s parity pricing, most fetish events are the same with a few exceptions - many Kinksters actively choose not to attend events with gendered pricing
It's not an urban myth then? That saying you often hear in clubs; "You should have been here last week, the place was packed with single women!" "
Nope - there’s been times at kestrels where there was way too many women and zero men!! We used to have to put out SOS’s  |
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I host the great northern social at club sx, we gear it towards newcomers to the club scene, and yes the playrooms are open, we like a no pressure friendly vibe, no frills, no theme, dj and karaoke, people come and have a giggle, its a really good night |
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"All socials need a venue and sometimes it’s difficult to find somewhere suitable so a club is a good option. I’ve seen two clubs do socials. I think one is free 7-10 and you pay if you want to stay later which seems fair. It’s also a safe/cheap way to see the club before you try it for a play event.
Free entry (if you’re on the guest list) 7-10 is a great idea, especially for the single guys who are curious about the club scene, but put off by extortionate gender disparity. How many times in the forums and status updates do you see people complaining about a lack of single guys in clubs, and usually from single women who pay £0 entry fees......?
Actually, it is more likely that women complain about too many single guys, who just follow you about. Many clubs have very reasonable prices for men.
Yeah I've never been at a club with not enough guys.
Not enough guys with manners... That's another story.
Over the festive period, I noticed a status post from (admittedly an event host) staying “Where are all the single guys? I have 10 hot single women in the club looking for company?” I also noted women on the run-up to NYE trying to attract single guys in to one particular club; they seemed amazed more guys wouldn’t pay £35 entry as opposed to them getting in for free......
I posted something not dissimilar for my HU9 fet night - we did have a huge amount of single ladies coming and very few guys. For the fet night it’s parity pricing, most fetish events are the same with a few exceptions - many Kinksters actively choose not to attend events with gendered pricing
It's not an urban myth then? That saying you often hear in clubs; "You should have been here last week, the place was packed with single women!"
Nope - there’s been times at kestrels where there was way too many women and zero men!! We used to have to put out SOS’s "
I’ve definitely been going to the wrong clubs then |
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Interesting thread.
Speaking from our experience, we have been to public socials in a pub and club socials.
The pub socials felt like it left us a little vulnerable to anyone to wander over and try to pry what was happening and looking at who was attending. We felt a little exposed being in a public place. Not everyone seemed to chat or mingle.
The clubs felt more natural to us. Everyone at the social knew what it was all about and the evening felt more relaxed. People were more at ease (but still a little apprehensive) But the evenings felt more relaxed to us.
Either way we had to pay for drinks and the travelling there and back, so that didn't bother us as its all part of an evening out. Even if you arrange a meet somewhere those costs will be involved.
Its all about feeling comfortable in your surroundings and the company you spend time with.
The only way to find out what works for you is to go and experience both and see how you feel |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We've attend both types of evenings and to be fair enjoyed both aspects. Pub socials are a great way to relax and meet new fab people to chat to and see if their is a connection for maybe meeting later or at another time, and let's face it some people don't want to go to clubs ever on fab.
Club socials are great also because then you can add more sexy clothing and to be able to check out a club without having to feel uncomfortable, but then stay to play if you want to. Each to thier own and diversity of options is great for us. Mr |
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By *aznlouCouple
over a year ago
co durham |
We’ve been to both pub/night club socials & socials in swingers clubs. We did feel safer in swingers clubs quite like how xtasia had it at their ffff. Some pub meets people do end up playing & does leave you exposed. Been to several where members of the public have been staring & comments made. We’ve steered clear of socials recently |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"Wondering peoples thoughts?
Socials esp large scale ones to me are for those who want to meet like minded people in a pressure free environment.
Some genuinely dont want to attend a club.....however its come to my attention that one in particular is trying to host socials (mainly to benefit financially)
What's majority of peoples views?
Keep socials as a separate entity or associate it with club scene?"
I am going to be very very "old school" on this.... to me they should be completely seperate entities
clubs hosting socials for me blurs a lot of lines for me.... clubs hosting socials to try and benefit their bottom lines is a complete no no!!!!
when i held socials.... either the money came out of my pocket, which i was happy to do for the greater good (I know not everyone was like me!) or if there was a surplus after whiprounds that money went to charities!
socials should be exactly that.. socialising, no play affairs... its a change to get to chat and meet people without having a play pressure...
organisers were pushing boundries for me, which is why i stopped attending my local socials, without those being blurred any further |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A club is a business concern, so why shouldn't it benefit financially?
Socials aren't there to generate profit. People all over UK host socials to benefit the scene not turn a quick buck
So when a social is held in a pub/bar or regular club the owner gives the room for free, doesn't expect the attendees to buy drinks from the bar, the organisers to order a buffet from them?
I think socials at a club are a good idea.
The club on the night usually waives membership fees as long as you are on the guest list. Which is a bonus as they can be expensive if you are curious but don't want to blow a fair chunk of change on something you may find isn't for you. You can find out if what you have heard about swingers clubs is true or not, does it live upto your expectations or fears.
It gives those who wish to dip their toes into the club scene an opening to do just that. Those who have no wish to ever set foot in a club can easily avoid them by going to one of the many other socials which aren't hosted in a club.
There is room for all."
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We used to hold socials once a week and they were very successful. It does give a non pressured environment for people to network in. We had a large group of single women attend, as they felt it was a safe place to meet up with men for a social before deciding to play. Just a nice way to meet like minded people in a fairly normal, non 'club night' environment  |
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Somebody has hired our club in the past to run Fab socials which were great. But these were more for people purely on Fab to put faces to names on the forums and make connections for future play dates.
There have also been Liverpool socials which were in nilla pubs and it was purely social and networking. However, if people wanted to come to the club later, having met some new friends at the social, they came in for a reduced price to try the place out. So there was a choice...purely social or a social with the option to try Townhouse later on. |
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"Somebody has hired our club in the past to run Fab socials which were great. But these were more for people purely on Fab to put faces to names on the forums and make connections for future play dates.
There have also been Liverpool socials which were in nilla pubs and it was purely social and networking. However, if people wanted to come to the club later, having met some new friends at the social, they came in for a reduced price to try the place out. So there was a choice...purely social or a social with the option to try Townhouse later on. "
I like this. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've been to both types of socials. I far prefer club socials, they were far more relaxed. The pub socials I've been to were awful, no one was friendly and people were shagging in the pub loos, the pub corridors, the room hired for the event and the car park. Hence the pubs no longer allowed the hosts to hire the room. In club socials people can play if they want, without annoying the owners, or chat and make friends. |
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"I've been to both types of socials. I far prefer club socials, they were far more relaxed. The pub socials I've been to were awful, no one was friendly and people were shagging in the pub loos, the pub corridors, the room hired for the event and the car park. Hence the pubs no longer allowed the hosts to hire the room. In club socials people can play if they want, without annoying the owners, or chat and make friends."
Good grief, the pub socials I've been to have been nothing like this |
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"I've been to both types of socials. I far prefer club socials, they were far more relaxed. The pub socials I've been to were awful, no one was friendly and people were shagging in the pub loos, the pub corridors, the room hired for the event and the car park. Hence the pubs no longer allowed the hosts to hire the room. In club socials people can play if they want, without annoying the owners, or chat and make friends.
Good grief, the pub socials I've been to have been nothing like this "
I only went to one pub social, in my local town, and (fortunately) was warned off the event just as I got my drink at the bar. Apparently the word was out via FB that swingers were holding a meet there, and people’s kids were going down to check it out! I kept my distance, but it was obvious to me who they were, sat around one large table right in the middle of the Wetherspoons. The staff knew what was going on too lol, lots of ‘nudge, nudge, wink, wink’ going on between themselves This one event is why I would favour a social night in a club, rather than anywhere else. Plus, being a single guy in a club at such an event would be quite palatable |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think it is a really good idea and I have no issue at all with clubs that want to host socials (even if they hope it might generate income if people decide to return to the club).
As with everything, people have the power to decide whether to attend or not and can vote with their feet.
Personally I would attend a club asocial just as much (or maybe more) as I would attend a social elsewhere."
best response here, couldn't agree more, people's choice in the first instance and completely on topic! |
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By *HaRiFMan
over a year ago
Beyond the shadows. |
"Wondering peoples thoughts?
Socials esp large scale ones to me are for those who want to meet like minded people in a pressure free environment.
Some genuinely dont want to attend a club.....however its come to my attention that one in particular is trying to host socials (mainly to benefit financially)
What's majority of peoples views?
Keep socials as a separate entity or associate it with club scene?"
There's rooms for both types, I personally don't mind where they are held as longs as its a good well organised social. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I agree with what people have said about there being room for both... as the thread shows some prefer the no pressure of the pub scene and others prefer the privacy of a club setting
As for the venue making a profit i don’t see an issue with that either, if they are able to host a range of events play and non play that keeps them profitable and therefore available to the scene then where is the harm?
The impression i am getting from statuses and forums posts I have seen is that there is a bit of an axe to grind here between former employee and employer ... and no matter which direction is instigating it would be best kept offline |
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By *umpkinMan
over a year ago
near the sounds of the wimborne quarter jack! |
"Wondering peoples thoughts?
Socials esp large scale ones to me are for those who want to meet like minded people in a pressure free environment.
Some genuinely dont want to attend a club.....however its come to my attention that one in particular is trying to host socials (mainly to benefit financially)
What's majority of peoples views?
Keep socials as a separate entity or associate it with club scene?
I am going to be very very "old school" on this.... to me they should be completely seperate entities
clubs hosting socials for me blurs a lot of lines for me.... clubs hosting socials to try and benefit their bottom lines is a complete no no!!!!
when i held socials.... either the money came out of my pocket, which i was happy to do for the greater good (I know not everyone was like me!) or if there was a surplus after whiprounds that money went to charities!
socials should be exactly that.. socialising, no play affairs... its a change to get to chat and meet people without having a play pressure...
organisers were pushing boundries for me, which is why i stopped attending my local socials, without those being blurred any further"
And I am "old school" enough to have attended just such events. With no play and away from a club but in a closed venue, usually a hotel conference room or a pub and 50-100 people, it was exactly what it should be and overall, completely safe. |
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"Wait a minute.....
People organize socials for free?
They don’t make any money for all their time and effort? "
Yes.
Some people like to do things for the benefit of the community.
Social events at clubs are often free entry too |
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By *anky_PankyWoman
over a year ago
Filthy Fuckeryville |
"A club is a business concern, so why shouldn't it benefit financially?
Socials aren't there to generate profit. People all over UK host socials to benefit the scene not turn a quick buck
This. I admit I often send a bucket round at my socials and donate to a charity of someone’s choice.
Let’s be real, it’s NEVER a social in a club is it? There’s always play... it’s just another night at the club...."
It depends on the club. If the social and play areas are separate then it's logically separate?
I've been to or hosted all kinds of socials. Nilla venues both open areas and private rooms in bars, Clubs where both play could and could not happen and enjoyed them all in truth |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Wait a minute.....
People organize socials for free?
They don’t make any money for all their time and effort?
Yes.
Some people like to do things for the benefit of the community.
Social events at clubs are often free entry too "
Wow , kudos to you guys in the UK......
The American socials are a big money grab.... |
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"A club is a business concern, so why shouldn't it benefit financially?
Socials aren't there to generate profit. People all over UK host socials to benefit the scene not turn a quick buck
So why are all the socials on forums asking for entry fees for socials? To meet costs and I do believe some are benefiting from them so why shouldn't clubs ? "
I think £2.50 for a social is fair as we have to cover venue costs, all money over goes to our charity |
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"why is there any fee for swingers socials anywhere when fetish munches (socials) are generally free with the venue happy to profit from the extra bar takings in lue of a fee. "
Our socials were always free, people wanted a nicer private venue not easy to find in York town centre
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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago
Stoke area |
I have organised socials in private rooms in a pub and also helped host one using a club's facilities , but they have been SOCIALS.
They have always been free and no play involved. It's great for networking and people can make their own plans for future occasions whilst there. I suggest people attend socials as a great introduction to swinging and as an ideal means to meet more people.
I am shocked by the idea of people shagging in pub car parks and inappropriate venues.  |
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"why is there any fee for swingers socials anywhere when fetish munches (socials) are generally free with the venue happy to profit from the extra bar takings in lue of a fee. "
To be honest, our Wirral munch is free entry and we always make a loss every time. People can be so tight and often drink tap water. We've been running the Wirral munch for donkies years and barely made a penny; we do it to serve our massive BDSM community and give back.
Hoping my reward will be beer on tap and free wifi when I go to hell! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Can’t think of anything worse than attending a social only meet in a pub, trying to avoid attention from the regulars, having to keep my clothes on and talking in hushed voices, yawn  |
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"A club is a business concern, so why shouldn't it benefit financially?
Socials aren't there to generate profit. People all over UK host socials to benefit the scene not turn a quick buck"
Oh for goodness sake save me from twue believers
Ms Icebreaker |
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By *ummygirlWoman
over a year ago
currently my bed |
"why is there any fee for swingers socials anywhere when fetish munches (socials) are generally free with the venue happy to profit from the extra bar takings in lue of a fee. Our socials were always free, people wanted a nicer private venue not easy to find in York town centre"
The Lick and Bicker one is free too (although I'm crap at cake, so my donation will be shop bought!) |
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I don’t see any issue with a commercial entity making money from organising a social. After all wherever you hold the social is going to make money over the bar, etc.
I do agree it could blur the lines a little, so the ideal situation for me is what one of the clubs local to
Me is doing. Organise the social at a local non swinger club to the swinger club, but include entry to the swingers club within the price for anyone who then wants to follow on with play.
Other advantages of running it in a club include people not being worried about beating seen in a public place at a swinger event (I know it’s generally a private function), and it’s a way of encouraging people into the club scene as well.
Ultimately whether it’s in a club or not, people have a choice as to whether they will want to attend or not. Do we really need a one size fits all approach? |
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"Wondering peoples thoughts?
Socials esp large scale ones to me are for those who want to meet like minded people in a pressure free environment.
Some genuinely dont want to attend a club.....however its come to my attention that one in particular is trying to host socials (mainly to benefit financially)
What's majority of peoples views?
Keep socials as a separate entity or associate it with club scene?"
To be honest at Vanilla Alternative we tend to say to anyone that joins, come for the social aspect and atmosphere and go through to the play rooms if you fancy it. I’d not have a drink and a dance with us and you’ve had a great evening :-
Kim xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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So. In terms of a social where people want to meet people and say maybe want to arrange future meets. Yeah these should be done away from clubs.
Not to say that newbie nights should not be encouraged but that isn't a social. However I've got to say recently attended a social in Chicago with a 1:1 1/2 ratio. About 300 people there. Fuck what a night that was. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" recently attended a social in Chicago with a 1:1 1/2 ratio. About 300 people there. Fuck what a night that was.
Purely social ?"
Nope was social until 11pm then descended into anarchy. Sweet beautiful anarchy. |
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"All socials need a venue and sometimes it’s difficult to find somewhere suitable so a club is a good option. I’ve seen two clubs do socials. I think one is free 7-10 and you pay if you want to stay later which seems fair. It’s also a safe/cheap way to see the club before you try it for a play event. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Wondering peoples thoughts?
Socials esp large scale ones to me are for those who want to meet like minded people in a pressure free environment.
Some genuinely dont want to attend a club.....however its come to my attention that one in particular is trying to host socials (mainly to benefit financially)
What's majority of peoples views?
Keep socials as a separate entity or associate it with club scene?
To be honest at Vanilla Alternative we tend to say to anyone that joins, come for the social aspect and atmosphere and go through to the play rooms if you fancy it. I’d not have a drink and a dance with us and you’ve had a great evening :-
Kim xx"
Yep this is true of most clubs half there don’t play, seen the same regulars sitting at the bar all night or strutting in the dance floor with no intention of playing, cannot see the point of social get togethers, go to a club and socialise at least if you want to play you can, in our case we’d never go anywhere to just socialise, we go out to play.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A social in a vanilla venue sounds terrifying & awkward to me! And what do you tell the landlord when booking if people want to be discreet?!
Clubs hosting socials is a great way to get newbies in!
W x
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"why is there any fee for swingers socials anywhere when fetish munches (socials) are generally free with the venue happy to profit from the extra bar takings in lue of a fee.
To be honest, our Wirral munch is free entry and we always make a loss every time. People can be so tight and often drink tap water. We've been running the Wirral munch for donkies years and barely made a penny; we do it to serve our massive BDSM community and give back.
Hoping my reward will be beer on tap and free wifi when I go to hell!"
If its any comfort, we have been to both the BDSM socials and the normal social and they are excellent (we buy a couple of beers too). |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"A social in a vanilla venue sounds terrifying & awkward to me! And what do you tell the landlord when booking if people want to be discreet?!
Clubs hosting socials is a great way to get newbies in!
W x
"
since you are from wigan... let me use an example "back in the day"...
the wigan munch was one of the big social events in the swinging calendar a few years ago... they organised it as far as i am aware a a big birthday party for their friends in the scene that morphed into a bigger event
and it was a brilliant night, people came from all over the country and stayed in various different hotels
it was a private party in a non play vanilla atmosphere where people can socialise... people were trusted that they could be sensible for a few hours... and if people wanted to do stuff after, there were enough things going on after..... |
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By *eavenNhellCouple
over a year ago
carrbrook stalybridge |
"A social in a vanilla venue sounds terrifying & awkward to me! And what do you tell the landlord when booking if people want to be discreet?!
Clubs hosting socials is a great way to get newbies in!
W x
"
you tell the landlord that your a dance club or slimming world and if he let's you use his back room that would otherwise be sat empty his takings will up over the bar usually works . why would a group of people dressed in their normal clothes having a few drinks with like minded people be "terrifying " unless you are doing something to attract vanilla folks attention it's a social not an orgy |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"
Yep this is true of most clubs half there don’t play, seen the same regulars sitting at the bar all night or strutting in the dance floor with no intention of playing, cannot see the point of social get togethers, go to a club and socialise at least if you want to play you can, in our case we’d never go anywhere to just socialise, we go out to play...."
and if you go out to just play and not to socialise...and it works for you... then run with in! jump on who you want to jump on
but you aren't everyone.... and not everyone works at the same speed as you do! some people like the social side as well as the playing
a lot of people like to dip in a toe rather than jump right in..... and thats where socials are brilliant, they can see what people are like in normal settings before deciding if they do want to take it further!
and that where socials in clubs blur lines that I don't think helps.....
look at it as once stage at a time... i'd rather people were not "rabbits in headlights" and if socials can help people feel calmer and more confident into then going to clubs, that should be encouraged |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We just held a social between xmas & New Year, we never usually open at that time and wanted to try a social, we charged £5 for entry or £10 if you wanted to stay over all night. We dont have an alcohol license so dont make up money on alcohol sales .
It didn't work great for us, it cost more than the reduced entry fees made, it was supposed to be a social and stayover but everyone thought it was a usual club night so wanted to play but the playrooms werent open cos it was a social.
To be fair there were a few newbies that came to have a look so that was good
I dont think the op is referring to us as we dont sell alcohol but clubs do have overheads and as they are exclusive and not open to all they have to cover their bills somehow?
In principle I think its a great idea, but in practise our attendees just wanted to have fun & play..... I dont think it worked for us so probably wont do it again but I think club owners are really entitled to do what they think is best ? Surely? We all have to get by? Some may ask why socials charge at all when in a pub the landlord will make plenty on alcohol sales?
Great posts and lots of viewpoints |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A club is a business concern, so why shouldn't it benefit financially?
Socials aren't there to generate profit. People all over UK host socials to benefit the scene not turn a quick buck
So why are all the socials on forums asking for entry fees for socials? To meet costs and I do believe some are benefiting from them so why shouldn't clubs ?
Big difference between £5 to cover cost of hiring a venue as opposed to £15+ where play is normally expected in a club "
Actually there isnt a big difference as a social is a one off event, with no overheads.
Clubs have to get an awful lot of things right that cost lots of money when done properly and occasional socials dont have to worry about any of that. |
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As Co-organiser of one of probably the biggest socials on the scene (held in a vanilla venue) it does frustrate me that I see people making cash and keeping it for themselves. (I’m talking about people, not clubs!)
But that’s just my nature, I suppose there would be many that would disagree with me. |
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By *arlo82 OP Woman
over a year ago
the gym and random places |
"A club is a business concern, so why shouldn't it benefit financially?
Socials aren't there to generate profit. People all over UK host socials to benefit the scene not turn a quick buck
So why are all the socials on forums asking for entry fees for socials? To meet costs and I do believe some are benefiting from them so why shouldn't clubs ?
Big difference between £5 to cover cost of hiring a venue as opposed to £15+ where play is normally expected in a club
Actually there isnt a big difference as a social is a one off event, with no overheads.
Clubs have to get an awful lot of things right that cost lots of money when done properly and occasional socials dont have to worry about any of that. "
On the contrary themed events do have overheads as do door staff and other items that require to be paid. Which is why established socials have the £5pp attached.
More to it than most appreciate |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
On the contrary themed events do have overheads as do door staff and other items that require to be paid. Which is why established socials have the £5pp attached.
More to it than most appreciate "
Yes I see where you are coming from but These are one off costs though & clubs have alot of other long term costs to cover |
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By *arlo82 OP Woman
over a year ago
the gym and random places |
"
On the contrary themed events do have overheads as do door staff and other items that require to be paid. Which is why established socials have the £5pp attached.
More to it than most appreciate
Yes I see where you are coming from but These are one off costs though & clubs have alot of other long term costs to cover"
Yes clubs have running costs that they must account for on an annual basis. The only cost associated with them attempting to host a social would be staff for event.
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I think what people seem to forget is a venue has to heat their venue, cost of opening and then their time which would normally be their free time for owners or event organisers. I have no issue paying £5-10 for a social if it means I'm going to a place that I can also play at. It also means I'm at a place where I have similar interests to others and can talk freely instead of worrying about regulars. Although saying that I do speak about weird sexual things in public places. Always good to see the general public reacting to fisting and anal douching!
Not to mention socials are the most cliquey places. Are we forgetting that?
A social at a club is also a great way to see a venue without paying normal prices to get in.
As for people throwing digs and hints at people on the forums. A) there is nothing wrong with a person advertising a club (unless they are directly lying to get people in with no intention to play) b) maybe the elitist people on the forum should actually meet and play with people instead of being keyboard warriors!
I go to one club and always push their events. Not just because I'm doing it for them but it's the same thing as saying I really enjoy a place and chatting about it with my fab friends. I benefit from that by getting to meet in a safe environment, making a great place I enjoy more busy which means a better atmosphere. But if I arrange fun there I follow through and I don't see anything wrong with that. |
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That’s the point though, (& for the record though I’m all for lots of events to keep the scene swinging) if there’s play (as people keep saying would be a pull for them) is it REALLY a social?
Just playing devils advocate |
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"That’s the point though, (& for the record though I’m all for lots of events to keep the scene swinging) if there’s play (as people keep saying would be a pull for them) is it REALLY a social?
Just playing devils advocate "
See your point but I wouldn't just go to a social. Social and play I think is a better option and at least you can have that at a club. |
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By *arlo82 OP Woman
over a year ago
the gym and random places |
"I think what people seem to forget is a venue has to heat their venue, cost of opening and then their time which would normally be their free time for owners or event organisers. I have no issue paying £5-10 for a social if it means I'm going to a place that I can also play at. It also means I'm at a place where I have similar interests to others and can talk freely instead of worrying about regulars. Although saying that I do speak about weird sexual things in public places. Always good to see the general public reacting to fisting and anal douching!
Not to mention socials are the most cliquey places. Are we forgetting that?
A social at a club is also a great way to see a venue without paying normal prices to get in.
As for people throwing digs and hints at people on the forums. A) there is nothing wrong with a person advertising a club (unless they are directly lying to get people in with no intention to play) b) maybe the elitist people on the forum should actually meet and play with people instead of being keyboard warriors!
I go to one club and always push their events. Not just because I'm doing it for them but it's the same thing as saying I really enjoy a place and chatting about it with my fab friends. I benefit from that by getting to meet in a safe environment, making a great place I enjoy more busy which means a better atmosphere. But if I arrange fun there I follow through and I don't see anything wrong with that. "
Disagree with the cliquey comment and why can't people have a night out without making the sex start?
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"I think what people seem to forget is a venue has to heat their venue, cost of opening and then their time which would normally be their free time for owners or event organisers. I have no issue paying £5-10 for a social if it means I'm going to a place that I can also play at. It also means I'm at a place where I have similar interests to others and can talk freely instead of worrying about regulars. Although saying that I do speak about weird sexual things in public places. Always good to see the general public reacting to fisting and anal douching!
Not to mention socials are the most cliquey places. Are we forgetting that?
A social at a club is also a great way to see a venue without paying normal prices to get in.
As for people throwing digs and hints at people on the forums. A) there is nothing wrong with a person advertising a club (unless they are directly lying to get people in with no intention to play) b) maybe the elitist people on the forum should actually meet and play with people instead of being keyboard warriors!
I go to one club and always push their events. Not just because I'm doing it for them but it's the same thing as saying I really enjoy a place and chatting about it with my fab friends. I benefit from that by getting to meet in a safe environment, making a great place I enjoy more busy which means a better atmosphere. But if I arrange fun there I follow through and I don't see anything wrong with that.
Disagree with the cliquey comment and why can't people have a night out without making the sex start?
"
They can, our last social at club sx had very little play, they were all downstairs having a laugh |
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By *arlo82 OP Woman
over a year ago
the gym and random places |
"I think what people seem to forget is a venue has to heat their venue, cost of opening and then their time which would normally be their free time for owners or event organisers. I have no issue paying £5-10 for a social if it means I'm going to a place that I can also play at. It also means I'm at a place where I have similar interests to others and can talk freely instead of worrying about regulars. Although saying that I do speak about weird sexual things in public places. Always good to see the general public reacting to fisting and anal douching!
Not to mention socials are the most cliquey places. Are we forgetting that?
A social at a club is also a great way to see a venue without paying normal prices to get in.
As for people throwing digs and hints at people on the forums. A) there is nothing wrong with a person advertising a club (unless they are directly lying to get people in with no intention to play) b) maybe the elitist people on the forum should actually meet and play with people instead of being keyboard warriors!
I go to one club and always push their events. Not just because I'm doing it for them but it's the same thing as saying I really enjoy a place and chatting about it with my fab friends. I benefit from that by getting to meet in a safe environment, making a great place I enjoy more busy which means a better atmosphere. But if I arrange fun there I follow through and I don't see anything wrong with that.
Disagree with the cliquey comment and why can't people have a night out without making the sex start?
They can, our last social at club sx had very little play, they were all downstairs having a laugh "
I know they can it was in response to those saying that play could happen in a club venue |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"All socials need a venue and sometimes it’s difficult to find somewhere suitable so a club is a good option. I’ve seen two clubs do socials. I think one is free 7-10 and you pay if you want to stay later which seems fair. It’s also a safe/cheap way to see the club before you try it for a play event.
Free entry (if you’re on the guest list) 7-10 is a great idea, especially for the single guys who are curious about the club scene, but put off by extortionate gender disparity. How many times in the forums and status updates do you see people complaining about a lack of single guys in clubs, and usually from single women who pay £0 entry fees......?
Actually, it is more likely that women complain about too many single guys, who just follow you about. Many clubs have very reasonable prices for men.
Yeah I've never been at a club with not enough guys.
Not enough guys with manners... That's another story.
Over the festive period, I noticed a status post from (admittedly an event host) staying “Where are all the single guys? I have 10 hot single women in the club looking for company?” I also noted women on the run-up to NYE trying to attract single guys in to one particular club; they seemed amazed more guys wouldn’t pay £35 entry as opposed to them getting in for free......
I cynically wonder if that was just an attempt to get more money through the door rather than anything factual.
I'm not a host or club staff, and I've never seen a situation where numerically guys are too few.
I’m sure it was click-bait too
I was in a club very recently, where I was one of only four single guys in. It was a fancy dress party event, and filled with couples embracing the theme, but staying in their little groups. I got chatting with a couple at the bar, the wife was keen to chat, but hubby stood between us, his back turned to me and one arm firmly against the bar, so I knew my presence wasn’t welcome. I left soon after, as it was clearly a couples for couples only night, and explained why there were so few single guys in. I will also know to avoid similar events there in future "
I was in Quest a couple of months ago and have to say I was one of a handful of single males. There were loads of single ladies and not so many couples that the ladies were walking around looking for the guys. Something I have never seen before . Yes it's a true story I have no need to lie and can back it up with friends that were at the same event . Needless to say we had lots of fun that night |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
On the contrary themed events do have overheads as do door staff and other items that require to be paid. Which is why established socials have the £5pp attached.
More to it than most appreciate
Yes I see where you are coming from but These are one off costs though & clubs have alot of other long term costs to cover
Yes clubs have running costs that they must account for on an annual basis. The only cost associated with them attempting to host a social would be staff for event.
"
Not quite that simple, that is part of it but not all of the costs involved in opening the doors. |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
the other big part of the issue is that word "social" has for in extensive purposes been co-opted/hijacked... so where in the past everyone knew what a social (munch) was.... now its just a catch all term....
clubs organising a social isn't a "social" in my eyes....events being held in clubs are not "socials" in my eyes either
they are club events... and so be treated and labelled as such
one to one meets are not "socials" either.... they are meets... if you play or not they are meets
the definitions have been skewed! if we can get back to clearly defined (and agreed) definitions... and that would lead to those sorts of events being advertised in the right places, then people would be much clearer as to what they are signing up for! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"the other big part of the issue is that word "social" has for in extensive purposes been co-opted/hijacked... so where in the past everyone knew what a social (munch) was.... now its just a catch all term....
clubs organising a social isn't a "social" in my eyes....events being held in clubs are not "socials" in my eyes either
they are club events... and so be treated and labelled as such
one to one meets are not "socials" either.... they are meets... if you play or not they are meets
the definitions have been skewed! if we can get back to clearly defined (and agreed) definitions... and that would lead to those sorts of events being advertised in the right places, then people would be much clearer as to what they are signing up for!"
Good point as you say it is a catch all term |
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By *arlo82 OP Woman
over a year ago
the gym and random places |
"the other big part of the issue is that word "social" has for in extensive purposes been co-opted/hijacked... so where in the past everyone knew what a social (munch) was.... now its just a catch all term....
clubs organising a social isn't a "social" in my eyes....events being held in clubs are not "socials" in my eyes either
they are club events... and so be treated and labelled as such
one to one meets are not "socials" either.... they are meets... if you play or not they are meets
the definitions have been skewed! if we can get back to clearly defined (and agreed) definitions... and that would lead to those sorts of events being advertised in the right places, then people would be much clearer as to what they are signing up for!"
Meeting someone socially is a social by definition.... meeting someone is meeting it doesn't imply sex and nor should a social.
Read adverts regarding socials- they're clearly listed and in no way sound like a club listed event night |
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By *arlo82 OP Woman
over a year ago
the gym and random places |
"
On the contrary themed events do have overheads as do door staff and other items that require to be paid. Which is why established socials have the £5pp attached.
More to it than most appreciate
Yes I see where you are coming from but These are one off costs though & clubs have alot of other long term costs to cover
Yes clubs have running costs that they must account for on an annual basis. The only cost associated with them attempting to host a social would be staff for event.
Not quite that simple, that is part of it but not all of the costs involved in opening the doors. "
I am aware of the 2 definitions and what each entail - this thread has veered somewhat though as most do. |
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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago
Stoke area |
"the other big part of the issue is that word "social" has for in extensive purposes been co-opted/hijacked... so where in the past everyone knew what a social (munch) was.... now its just a catch all term....
clubs organising a social isn't a "social" in my eyes....events being held in clubs are not "socials" in my eyes either
they are club events... and so be treated and labelled as such
one to one meets are not "socials" either.... they are meets... if you play or not they are meets
the definitions have been skewed! if we can get back to clearly defined (and agreed) definitions... and that would lead to those sorts of events being advertised in the right places, then people would be much clearer as to what they are signing up for!
Good point as you say it is a catch all term "
A social using a club venue when it is the chance to meet new people socially, fully clothed and no play...although it is a club event. It is a social.
If it's a social that then turns into play, then it's a club night for newbies .
For me , it isn't the venue, it's to do with clothing and if play is acceptable with the events rules. |
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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago
Stoke area |
"The risk of being found out is what terrifies me about social meet ups, especially if it is local.
W x"
Terrified of being recognised when fully dressed in a private function room of a pub ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
On the contrary themed events do have overheads as do door staff and other items that require to be paid. Which is why established socials have the £5pp attached.
More to it than most appreciate
Yes I see where you are coming from but These are one off costs though & clubs have alot of other long term costs to cover
Yes clubs have running costs that they must account for on an annual basis. The only cost associated with them attempting to host a social would be staff for event.
Not quite that simple, that is part of it but not all of the costs involved in opening the doors.
I am aware of the 2 definitions and what each entail - this thread has veered somewhat though as most do. "
Veering all over the place , all good.
You were the one who started it and also made the pop about clubs making financial gain, I am pointing out that its not just one off costs for a club to open its doors |
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By *arlo82 OP Woman
over a year ago
the gym and random places |
"
On the contrary themed events do have overheads as do door staff and other items that require to be paid. Which is why established socials have the £5pp attached.
More to it than most appreciate
Yes I see where you are coming from but These are one off costs though & clubs have alot of other long term costs to cover
Yes clubs have running costs that they must account for on an annual basis. The only cost associated with them attempting to host a social would be staff for event.
Not quite that simple, that is part of it but not all of the costs involved in opening the doors.
I am aware of the 2 definitions and what each entail - this thread has veered somewhat though as most do.
Veering all over the place , all good.
You were the one who started it and also made the pop about clubs making financial gain, I am pointing out that its not just one off costs for a club to open its doors "
This was my opening post
Wondering peoples thoughts?
Socials esp large scale ones to me are for those who want to meet like minded people in a pressure free environment.
Some genuinely dont want to attend a club.....however its come to my attention that one in particular is trying to host socials (mainly to benefit financially)
What's majority of peoples views?
Keep socials as a separate entity or associate it with club scene?
Others brought up cost - more to see a broad spectrum of views in this wonderfully diverse scene |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You brought up the financial part in your opening post!!!! mainly to benefit financially is what you said......other posts are merely pointing out that its not just benefiting financially its about costs as well, not just one off costs for single socials but ongoing, longterm costs for clubs.
My opinion is that its fine to run socials at clubs if thats what people want, whether they be to lose money out of the goodness of organisers hearts, break even or be for financial gain. Its also fine to run socials in pubs, whether it be free entry (risks with vanilla joe public there) or a specially booked one off location.
If people want to go they will go, if people dont they wont. You dont have exclusivity in socials - we dont have exclusivity in club events - other clubs dont have exclusivity in either club events or socials. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes, someone posted above the word can get out that it's a swingers meet. Someone could overhear something?
Not saying socials in vanilla venues are wrong, just not for us!
Much rather just have a club night!
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"
On the contrary themed events do have overheads as do door staff and other items that require to be paid. Which is why established socials have the £5pp attached.
More to it than most appreciate
Yes I see where you are coming from but These are one off costs though & clubs have alot of other long term costs to cover
Yes clubs have running costs that they must account for on an annual basis. The only cost associated with them attempting to host a social would be staff for event.
Not quite that simple, that is part of it but not all of the costs involved in opening the doors.
I am aware of the 2 definitions and what each entail - this thread has veered somewhat though as most do.
Veering all over the place , all good.
You were the one who started it and also made the pop about clubs making financial gain, I am pointing out that its not just one off costs for a club to open its doors
This was my opening post
Wondering peoples thoughts?
Socials esp large scale ones to me are for those who want to meet like minded people in a pressure free environment.
Some genuinely dont want to attend a club.....however its come to my attention that one in particular is trying to host socials (mainly to benefit financially)
What's majority of peoples views?
Keep socials as a separate entity or associate it with club scene?
Others brought up cost - more to see a broad spectrum of views in this wonderfully diverse scene "
You actually mentioned the financial bit first. |
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By *OXO2018Couple
over a year ago
Norfolk |
"Wondering peoples thoughts?
Socials esp large scale ones to me are for those who want to meet like minded people in a pressure free environment.
Some genuinely dont want to attend a club.....however its come to my attention that one in particular is trying to host socials (mainly to benefit financially)
What's majority of peoples views?
Keep socials as a separate entity or associate it with club scene?"
100% keep the two scenes separate. Socials are for chatting and getting to know people.
Clubs are for players and should be kept this way. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We have held a few socials at La Chambre. This was to encourage new people who maybe were worried about what actually is behind the doors of a swinging club. We wanted to offer the chance to have a no pressure visit where they could come in without the usual newbie club member worries. We opened from 7pm prior to the club opening on a saturday night, with no charge for the social. We offered a stay and play wristband with a £10 discount for anyone wanting to stay for the rest of the evening which could be done until we opened as normal. None of the play facilities, the pool, sauna or dungeon were opened until the normal time so it was just a social in the lounge area. We had staff on hand to show anyone round that wanted to see the facilities. We've always had busy nights with great comments about the events. We dont believe that a social should involve play at a club because that's what a normal club night does anyway!
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