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How to get replies

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By *ack R OP   Man  over a year ago

galway

Hi all,

Here a question that has been asked several times, in different ways, and in many sub forums. I’m asking it here in the Irish forum, just because it’s about my experience interacting in Ireland, although it could be a topic for the general forum.

It goes for everyone but it’s perhaps more directed at guys who are successful at receiving replies. What’s your approach?

I understand that women get way more messages than us guys in here or in any other similar platforms. In my case, I’ve tried to contact several local women. My messages have always been polite and well articulated and I haven’t sent random dick pics. Still, out of all the people that I contacted I had a bit of a conversation with three women, I had a nice social meeting with one of them (with verification) but that’s it. I sent a couple of “reminder” messages to a few of the women I’ve contacted and some have blocked me, without me being out of place, rude or extremely pushy. I have put a few photos here, and I have no problem sending face pics once I’ve talked to someone and I know they’re a real person. I don’t have a problem in terms of success in the real world, I’m reasonably good looking, I can hold a conversation in a few languages, and I’m generally good craic, that is if and when I get a chance to actually talk to the other person.

I think I have done everything correctly and by the books but it doesn’t seem to get me anywhere. The whole fab experience feels like a pointless exercise in fairness.

So, to those of you who are successful in this space, how do you do it?

And ladies, what’s your take? (This is open even those who have ignored me or blocked me)

Thanks!

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By *eralt80Man  over a year ago

cork

For the most part any time I’m sending a message to someone it’s due to a forum post or thread. It’s very rare I’ll send a message out of the blue.

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By *ofusplusCouple  over a year ago

Limerick

There are many ways to get in contact with ladies. You're only trying the private message route and it's not working so I'd suggest trying a different approach like attending socials and meeting ladies there face to face. Good luck

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By *iscuits8Man  over a year ago

Dublin/Birmingham


"For the most part any time I’m sending a message to someone it’s due to a forum post or thread. It’s very rare I’ll send a message out of the blue. "

Same as. I don't think I've actually started conversation with anyone here in months, maybe one or two but they weren't replied to. Ah well. Anyone I chat to is either from ages back, they've got in touch first (rare but it happens!) or like you said, it's topical/forum related.

"Reminder" messages would be a total no no though...

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By *ack R OP   Man  over a year ago

galway


"For the most part any time I’m sending a message to someone it’s due to a forum post or thread. It’s very rare I’ll send a message out of the blue. "

Thanks _eralt80. My messages where actually “out of the blue” without interaction in here. So maybe that’s a reason? Though, at the same time, many of us have shared interests that bring us on fab

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By *ack R OP   Man  over a year ago

galway


"There are many ways to get in contact with ladies. You're only trying the private message route and it's not working so I'd suggest trying a different approach like attending socials and meeting ladies there face to face. Good luck "

Thanks. I’ll definitely keep that in mind and switch gear

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By *ack R OP   Man  over a year ago

galway


"For the most part any time I’m sending a message to someone it’s due to a forum post or thread. It’s very rare I’ll send a message out of the blue.

Same as. I don't think I've actually started conversation with anyone here in months, maybe one or two but they weren't replied to. Ah well. Anyone I chat to is either from ages back, they've got in touch first (rare but it happens!) or like you said, it's topical/forum related.

"Reminder" messages would be a total no no though..."

Thanks

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By *ealitybitesMan  over a year ago

Belfast

Am I successful? I don't really know to be honest.

In comparison to some probably not but in relation to what I'm looking for then I guess I am very successful.

I don't rely on replies because I don't send messages and haven't sent a single first contact message since the beginning of 2020 so almost 3½ years.

I put all the effort into my bio and pics and the only part of the site I use is the forums.

People form an opinion on me based on my contributions and choose to get in touch.

Every conversation I've had in the last 3½ years has been started by someone else and not by me.

I've gone to a handful of group socials but they're not really for me so I doubt I'll be going to any more.

I'm not in any chatgroups either for various reasons but despite all that I have somehow got enough credit in the fab bank that people feel comfortable approaching me.

It's not how most people do fab but it works for me so I won't be changing my approach.

It's all down to your level of expectation and how patient you are. Otherwise it would be a very frustrating way of doing things.

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By *eline5000Woman  over a year ago

dublin

It’s not possible to reply to every message.

Anyone asking for pic in first message gets immediate block .

Or informing me there horny or board

Or moaning about how difficult it is to get reply

If it’s not sexual, intelligent and funny I will take a look

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By *osyRedLipsWoman  over a year ago

Kildare

The ethical limbo might be the issue some would want your partners consent.

Location location location the Whest isn't the swing capital of Ireland so you don't have as many to message as your counterparts would in Dublin

I can't comment on your profile as you haven't asked for advice. But plenty of pictures might be beneficial. As a single guy competition is stiff ladies get lot of messages here. So try to stand out.

Best of luck and don't get disheartened lots of guys struggling to get replies not just you.

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By *eline5000Woman  over a year ago

dublin

Also anyone that has drama free NSA…. BLOCK

Just my pet hate

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By *3nsesMan  over a year ago

Dublin

What makes your profile better than the majority of other male profiles? If you can't answer that, that's the first place I'd be looking.

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By *affa31Woman  over a year ago

Galway

Your profile text is negative from the outset and while you might say you don’t want drama, it reads very dramatic. You also don’t tell people what you bring to the table and why they should take a chance on meeting you.

Replying to messages is less about the message and more about how you present yourself in your profile.

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By *eline5000Woman  over a year ago

dublin

I don’t meet attached men…

But any guy who says there in a sexless marriage

Or ‘not getting it at home’

I find uncouth

If ur married just state that. Simple but affective

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By *ursecretmischiefCouple  over a year ago

The West


"Your profile text is negative from the outset and while you might say you don’t want drama, it reads very dramatic. You also don’t tell people what you bring to the table and why they should take a chance on meeting you.

Replying to messages is less about the message and more about how you present yourself in your profile. "

Ya, straight off the bat, remove that silly rant from your profile. That's guaranteed to turn anybody away!

Secondly, think the long game. Start by getting yourself to a social!

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By *ildarekinkstersCouple  over a year ago

kinkytown

If you mailed us we wouldn't reply. Negative from the start and that's not our cuppa tea.

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By *eline5000Woman  over a year ago

dublin


"Your profile text is negative from the outset and while you might say you don’t want drama, it reads very dramatic. You also don’t tell people what you bring to the table and why they should take a chance on meeting you.

Replying to messages is less about the message and more about how you present yourself in your profile.

Ya, straight off the bat, remove that silly rant from your profile. That's guaranteed to turn anybody away!

Secondly, think the long game. Start by getting yourself to a social!

"

For sure … socials are the best way

And going to a social does not mean ur getting the ride…..

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By *ursecretmischiefCouple  over a year ago

The West


"Your profile text is negative from the outset and while you might say you don’t want drama, it reads very dramatic. You also don’t tell people what you bring to the table and why they should take a chance on meeting you.

Replying to messages is less about the message and more about how you present yourself in your profile.

Ya, straight off the bat, remove that silly rant from your profile. That's guaranteed to turn anybody away!

Secondly, think the long game. Start by getting yourself to a social!

For sure … socials are the best way

And going to a social does not mean ur getting the ride….. "

Absolutely, as a man, it seems like the most obvious gateway onto the "scene", but its not instant gratification!

As I said think long the game, build up contacts, people who know you. Go to further socials, then parties, and so on!

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By *eline5000Woman  over a year ago

dublin


"Your profile text is negative from the outset and while you might say you don’t want drama, it reads very dramatic. You also don’t tell people what you bring to the table and why they should take a chance on meeting you.

Replying to messages is less about the message and more about how you present yourself in your profile.

Ya, straight off the bat, remove that silly rant from your profile. That's guaranteed to turn anybody away!

Secondly, think the long game. Start by getting yourself to a social!

For sure … socials are the best way

And going to a social does not mean ur getting the ride…..

Absolutely, as a man, it seems like the most obvious gateway onto the "scene", but its not instant gratification!

As I said think long the game, build up contacts, people who know you. Go to further socials, then parties, and so on!"

And have a bit of GAME…

I went to some great socials.

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By *ay_Gatsby_D4Man  over a year ago

City Centre, Dublin, Belfast

I think a lot of fellas forget that you’re talking to a human and not just a pair of tits

There is no cheat code to get responses it isn’t a PlayStation game, there’s no hacks to get what you’re after

It’s horses for courses and it’s all about people skills

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I think a lot of fellas forget that you’re talking to a human and not just a pair of tits

There is no cheat code to get responses it isn’t a PlayStation game, there’s no hacks to get what you’re after

It’s horses for courses and it’s all about people skills"

well said that man

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By *eline5000Woman  over a year ago

dublin

Agreed

Ur talking to a woman not a porn star

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By *iscuits8Man  over a year ago

Dublin/Birmingham

Geordie told me she was a porn star... at the weekends.

I've been had. Can't trust anyone on here...

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By *eline5000Woman  over a year ago

dublin


"Geordie told me she was a porn star... at the weekends.

I've been had. Can't trust anyone on here..."

Great weekend job

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Geordie told me she was a porn star... at the weekends.

I've been had. Can't trust anyone on here..."

Shurrup

I haven't declared the second income

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By *eline5000Woman  over a year ago

dublin


"Geordie told me she was a porn star... at the weekends.

I've been had. Can't trust anyone on here...

Shurrup

I haven't declared the second income "

It’s an art form and should be tax free

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By *iscuits8Man  over a year ago

Dublin/Birmingham


"Geordie told me she was a porn star... at the weekends.

I've been had. Can't trust anyone on here...

Shurrup

I haven't declared the second income "

Woops sorry. Sometimes we all need to take some cash in handjobs

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By *exesrangerMan  over a year ago

On the move

Best advise I can give you is to offer up your used underpants. Dewemen go crazy for stuff like that If that doesn't work offer cash as every lady loves to feel like she's worth something. Failing that.... women are the best listeners always there in a crisis, just tell them all your troubles and they will be like putty in your hands.

This is a thread about how to get more replies right ? See the way I see it,the more fellas I can get rid of the more chance I have of getting replies. Gotta play the long game.... its so very long though.... honestly

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By *eline5000Woman  over a year ago

dublin


"Best advise I can give you is to offer up your used underpants. Dewemen go crazy for stuff like that If that doesn't work offer cash as every lady loves to feel like she's worth something. Failing that.... women are the best listeners always there in a crisis, just tell them all your troubles and they will be like putty in your hands.

This is a thread about how to get more replies right ? See the way I see it,the more fellas I can get rid of the more chance I have of getting replies. Gotta play the long game.... its so very long though.... honestly "

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By *ack R OP   Man  over a year ago

galway


"Am I successful? I don't really know to be honest.

In comparison to some probably not but in relation to what I'm looking for then I guess I am very successful.

I don't rely on replies because I don't send messages and haven't sent a single first contact message since the beginning of 2020 so almost 3½ years.

I put all the effort into my bio and pics and the only part of the site I use is the forums.

People form an opinion on me based on my contributions and choose to get in touch.

Every conversation I've had in the last 3½ years has been started by someone else and not by me.

I've gone to a handful of group socials but they're not really for me so I doubt I'll be going to any more.

I'm not in any chatgroups either for various reasons but despite all that I have somehow got enough credit in the fab bank that people feel comfortable approaching me.

It's not how most people do fab but it works for me so I won't be changing my approach.

It's all down to your level of expectation and how patient you are. Otherwise it would be a very frustrating way of doing things."

Aye, thanks man. Yes, I think the main issue here is that I have approached communication in here wrongly. Not sure about socials either, but I supposed I’ll have to give it a go and see. Surely participating in forums seems to be the way to go

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By *ack R OP   Man  over a year ago

galway


"The ethical limbo might be the issue some would want your partners consent.

Location location location the Whest isn't the swing capital of Ireland so you don't have as many to message as your counterparts would in Dublin

I can't comment on your profile as you haven't asked for advice. But plenty of pictures might be beneficial. As a single guy competition is stiff ladies get lot of messages here. So try to stand out.

Best of luck and don't get disheartened lots of guys struggling to get replies not just you. "

Thanks Rosy. Yes I know the ethical limbo is not for everyone, and I respect that. I saw your profile here and on feeld, but I saw that you’re clear about not meeting attached people so, obviously, I didn’t contact.

Feel free to comment on my profile - others have done it - and I’ve already taken on board their suggestions

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By *ack R OP   Man  over a year ago

galway


"Your profile text is negative from the outset and while you might say you don’t want drama, it reads very dramatic. You also don’t tell people what you bring to the table and why they should take a chance on meeting you.

Replying to messages is less about the message and more about how you present yourself in your profile. "

Thanks Jaffa31 and the others who pointed out that about my profile. In fairness I put that rant as a way of venting. Admittedly it read fairly negative (cringe) and I got rid of it. Evidently I have been approaching this space wrongly, more as a message board than forum. I’ll revamp my profile too

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By *ack R OP   Man  over a year ago

galway


"And going to a social does not mean ur getting the ride….. "

Neither does messaging. And I wasn’t really approaching it this way I don’t think

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By *ack R OP   Man  over a year ago

galway


"I think a lot of fellas forget that you’re talking to a human and not just a pair of tits

There is no cheat code to get responses it isn’t a PlayStation game, there’s no hacks to get what you’re after

It’s horses for courses and it’s all about people skills"

Hey, thanks. I know it’s a general comment, but I’ve never messaged someone as a pair of tits only, rather from human to human. Perhaps it didn’t come across that way at times.

I wasn’t looking for “cheat codes” with my original post but rather for a view on what I was doing wrong. Got a few good pointers already

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By *ack R OP   Man  over a year ago

galway

[Removed by poster at 17/05/23 22:15:01]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Best advise I can give you is to offer up your used underpants. Dewemen go crazy for stuff like that If that doesn't work offer cash as every lady loves to feel like she's worth something. Failing that.... women are the best listeners always there in a crisis, just tell them all your troubles and they will be like putty in your hands.

This is a thread about how to get more replies right ? See the way I see it,the more fellas I can get rid of the more chance I have of getting replies. Gotta play the long game.... its so very long though.... honestly "

See he listens lol

I just want tea n biscuits

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By *ack R OP   Man  over a year ago

galway


"Best advise I can give you is to offer up your used underpants. Dewemen go crazy for stuff like that If that doesn't work offer cash as every lady loves to feel like she's worth something. Failing that.... women are the best listeners always there in a crisis, just tell them all your troubles and they will be like putty in your hands.

This is a thread about how to get more replies right ? See the way I see it,the more fellas I can get rid of the more chance I have of getting replies. Gotta play the long game.... its so very long though.... honestly "

Belter!

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By *ack R OP   Man  over a year ago

galway


"Best advise I can give you is to offer up your used underpants. Dewemen go crazy for stuff like that If that doesn't work offer cash as every lady loves to feel like she's worth something. Failing that.... women are the best listeners always there in a crisis, just tell them all your troubles and they will be like putty in your hands.

This is a thread about how to get more replies right ? See the way I see it,the more fellas I can get rid of the more chance I have of getting replies. Gotta play the long game.... its so very long though.... honestly

See he listens lol

I just want tea n biscuits "

Who me? Nah, just pretending

Tea and biscuits is the answer to many problems

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By *ack R OP   Man  over a year ago

galway


"If you mailed us we wouldn't reply. Negative from the start and that's not our cuppa tea. "

Fair enough. Thanks for pointing it out. Definitely not my intention to be negative, but yeah, it didn’t read well

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Best advise I can give you is to offer up your used underpants. Dewemen go crazy for stuff like that If that doesn't work offer cash as every lady loves to feel like she's worth something. Failing that.... women are the best listeners always there in a crisis, just tell them all your troubles and they will be like putty in your hands.

This is a thread about how to get more replies right ? See the way I see it,the more fellas I can get rid of the more chance I have of getting replies. Gotta play the long game.... its so very long though.... honestly

See he listens lol

I just want tea n biscuits "

Lyons or Barry's?

And more importantly, rich tea or digestive?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Best advise I can give you is to offer up your used underpants. Dewemen go crazy for stuff like that If that doesn't work offer cash as every lady loves to feel like she's worth something. Failing that.... women are the best listeners always there in a crisis, just tell them all your troubles and they will be like putty in your hands.

This is a thread about how to get more replies right ? See the way I see it,the more fellas I can get rid of the more chance I have of getting replies. Gotta play the long game.... its so very long though.... honestly

See he listens lol

I just want tea n biscuits

Lyons or Barry's?

And more importantly, rich tea or digestive? "

Lyons of course.. check out my pic

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Best advise I can give you is to offer up your used underpants. Dewemen go crazy for stuff like that If that doesn't work offer cash as every lady loves to feel like she's worth something. Failing that.... women are the best listeners always there in a crisis, just tell them all your troubles and they will be like putty in your hands.

This is a thread about how to get more replies right ? See the way I see it,the more fellas I can get rid of the more chance I have of getting replies. Gotta play the long game.... its so very long though.... honestly

See he listens lol

I just want tea n biscuits

Lyons or Barry's?

And more importantly, rich tea or digestive?

Lyons of course.. check out my pic "

I've checked them many a time first time noticing the teacup though

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Best advise I can give you is to offer up your used underpants. Dewemen go crazy for stuff like that If that doesn't work offer cash as every lady loves to feel like she's worth something. Failing that.... women are the best listeners always there in a crisis, just tell them all your troubles and they will be like putty in your hands.

This is a thread about how to get more replies right ? See the way I see it,the more fellas I can get rid of the more chance I have of getting replies. Gotta play the long game.... its so very long though.... honestly

See he listens lol

I just want tea n biscuits

Lyons or Barry's?

And more importantly, rich tea or digestive?

Lyons of course.. check out my pic

I've checked them many a time first time noticing the teacup though "

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By *astelloWoman  over a year ago

Tír na nÓg

For me, I tend to engage with those that have actually read my profile. The "hi" one word messages go no where. I like articulate and funny witty guys so that probably where the conversation goes for me. I do look at pics and actually read bios, personally I hate dick pics but it can be a range of things. Sexual preferences may be different, age not compatible, photos, distance etc.

It's a case of not one size fits all. Good luck op

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By *amsevenMan  over a year ago

cork

Some very good advice here OP. Main thing I would say is if things are negative don't let it get you down. Can be depressing at times but it's only fab

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By *ack R OP   Man  over a year ago

galway


"For me, I tend to engage with those that have actually read my profile. The "hi" one word messages go no where. I like articulate and funny witty guys so that probably where the conversation goes for me. I do look at pics and actually read bios, personally I hate dick pics but it can be a range of things. Sexual preferences may be different, age not compatible, photos, distance etc.

It's a case of not one size fits all. Good luck op"

Thanks Castello. I totally get it, except for once, I always contacted people local to me and I never sent a one word or one line message. That’s actually the thing, I always made the effort to engage with the individual and relate to their profile to initiate the chat.

From what I gather here, it seems that my approach has been wrong insofar I should have engaged with people in the forum rather than trying to dm them. Some people seem to take dm as an invasion of their space, and I didn’t think that was the case.

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By *ack R OP   Man  over a year ago

galway


"Some very good advice here OP. Main thing I would say is if things are negative don't let it get you down. Can be depressing at times but it's only fab "

Cheers man! Yes, there are definitely things that are much more important than Fab. I’m not letting this space getting me down. I just wanted to understand what I was doing that didn’t work. Some good tips here

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By *og-ManMan  over a year ago

somewhere

Just another aspect to look at Op

Some women / couples dont want to meet someone to close to their location anyway so ignore or block

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By *ack R OP   Man  over a year ago

galway


"Just another aspect to look at Op

Some women / couples dont want to meet someone to close to their location anyway so ignore or block "

True that. It would be handy to spell it out in the profile. I eventually got talking to a woman who told me she didn’t reply cause she didn’t want to meet anyone attached. Had she said that on her profile I would have not contact her.

I got guys who contacted me, definitely not as many messages as the ladies get, but I’ve always replied, even just with a quick “I’m not interested”. But again we’re talking a handful of replies vs hundreds.

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By *ealitybitesMan  over a year ago

Belfast


"Just another aspect to look at Op

Some women / couples dont want to meet someone to close to their location anyway so ignore or block

True that. It would be handy to spell it out in the profile. I eventually got talking to a woman who told me she didn’t reply cause she didn’t want to meet anyone attached. Had she said that on her profile I would have not contact her.

I got guys who contacted me, definitely not as many messages as the ladies get, but I’ve always replied, even just with a quick “I’m not interested”. But again we’re talking a handful of replies vs hundreds. "

When people list things they aren't interested in on their profiles they are accused of being negative or demanding or entitled so they can't really win.

It's always best to say on any profile what you can offer to anyone reading rather than just a list of what you want from the experience.

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By *ustBoWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down


"Just another aspect to look at Op

Some women / couples dont want to meet someone to close to their location anyway so ignore or block

True that. It would be handy to spell it out in the profile. I eventually got talking to a woman who told me she didn’t reply cause she didn’t want to meet anyone attached. Had she said that on her profile I would have not contact her.

I got guys who contacted me, definitely not as many messages as the ladies get, but I’ve always replied, even just with a quick “I’m not interested”. But again we’re talking a handful of replies vs hundreds. "

I only get a handful of messages but I don't feel obliged to answer anyone anymore.I use to but it opened the door for getting more messages and people asking just to chat even though I said I'm not meeting anyone new,then after a few messages they then ask to meet completely ignoring what I had told them at the start. So now if I don't like their profile or the message then I don't bother replying anymore.Mainly because I can't be bothered anymore with the hassle it can bring.

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By *osyRedLipsWoman  over a year ago

Kildare

I've men blocked now but here's past examples of saying those two simple words No Thanks...

Why not am I not your type

OK wanna watch me cum on Snapchat

Wanna meet me and my female friend

We can still chat even if your not meeting..(got kik wanna see me cum)

Ah probably better off you look like your riddled with everything

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By *elfastStudMan  over a year ago

Belfast

This was an interesting read! I struggle also to get replies here and I am always respectful and never sent any unsolicited nudes.

Would appreciate some constructive feedback on my profile from anyone reading this x

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By *ohn MacDMan  over a year ago

cork

All good tips! Thanks

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By *ack R OP   Man  over a year ago

galway


"Just another aspect to look at Op

Some women / couples dont want to meet someone to close to their location anyway so ignore or block

True that. It would be handy to spell it out in the profile. I eventually got talking to a woman who told me she didn’t reply cause she didn’t want to meet anyone attached. Had she said that on her profile I would have not contact her.

I got guys who contacted me, definitely not as many messages as the ladies get, but I’ve always replied, even just with a quick “I’m not interested”. But again we’re talking a handful of replies vs hundreds.

When people list things they aren't interested in on their profiles they are accused of being negative or demanding or entitled so they can't really win.

It's always best to say on any profile what you can offer to anyone reading rather than just a list of what you want from the experience. "

Maybe, but if, for example, you’re not interested in someone in particular (guys, couples, you name it), you’ll be saving both parties time stating it in your bio.

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By *ack R OP   Man  over a year ago

galway


"Just another aspect to look at Op

Some women / couples dont want to meet someone to close to their location anyway so ignore or block

True that. It would be handy to spell it out in the profile. I eventually got talking to a woman who told me she didn’t reply cause she didn’t want to meet anyone attached. Had she said that on her profile I would have not contact her.

I got guys who contacted me, definitely not as many messages as the ladies get, but I’ve always replied, even just with a quick “I’m not interested”. But again we’re talking a handful of replies vs hundreds.

I only get a handful of messages but I don't feel obliged to answer anyone anymore.I use to but it opened the door for getting more messages and people asking just to chat even though I said I'm not meeting anyone new,then after a few messages they then ask to meet completely ignoring what I had told them at the start. So now if I don't like their profile or the message then I don't bother replying anymore.Mainly because I can't be bothered anymore with the hassle it can bring. "

Sounds bad. That’s an example of guys ruining it for everyone else. I’ve had a couple of interactions in here and elsewhere in which I got a “sorry I’m not interested” reply, I thanked them for letting me know and moved on. But hey, we’re all different

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By *ack R OP   Man  over a year ago

galway


"I've men blocked now but here's past examples of saying those two simple words No Thanks...

Why not am I not your type

OK wanna watch me cum on Snapchat

Wanna meet me and my female friend

We can still chat even if your not meeting..(got kik wanna see me cum)

Ah probably better off you look like your riddled with everything

"

Cringe

Sorry you had this experience. Another great example of how some ruin it for all the other guys. I hope you had more positive, enriching interactions than shitty ones like this

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By *osyRedLipsWoman  over a year ago

Kildare


"I've men blocked now but here's past examples of saying those two simple words No Thanks...

Why not am I not your type

OK wanna watch me cum on Snapchat

Wanna meet me and my female friend

We can still chat even if your not meeting..(got kik wanna see me cum)

Ah probably better off you look like your riddled with everything

Cringe

Sorry you had this experience. Another great example of how some ruin it for all the other guys. I hope you had more positive, enriching interactions than shitty ones like this "

There's so many lovely guys on Fab who I've had such great positive interactions and experiences with I'm not tarring them all with the same brush.

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By *ustBoWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down


"Just another aspect to look at Op

Some women / couples dont want to meet someone to close to their location anyway so ignore or block

True that. It would be handy to spell it out in the profile. I eventually got talking to a woman who told me she didn’t reply cause she didn’t want to meet anyone attached. Had she said that on her profile I would have not contact her.

I got guys who contacted me, definitely not as many messages as the ladies get, but I’ve always replied, even just with a quick “I’m not interested”. But again we’re talking a handful of replies vs hundreds.

I only get a handful of messages but I don't feel obliged to answer anyone anymore.I use to but it opened the door for getting more messages and people asking just to chat even though I said I'm not meeting anyone new,then after a few messages they then ask to meet completely ignoring what I had told them at the start. So now if I don't like their profile or the message then I don't bother replying anymore.Mainly because I can't be bothered anymore with the hassle it can bring.

Sounds bad. That’s an example of guys ruining it for everyone else. I’ve had a couple of interactions in here and elsewhere in which I got a “sorry I’m not interested” reply, I thanked them for letting me know and moved on. But hey, we’re all different "

No one has ruined it for others,I've chatted to plenty of men on here who have known from the start I won't meet them. I've had more good interactions that bad on here with men. I just can't be bothered replying anymore because I don't want to if the profile or message doesn't appeal.Before I felt like I had to reply when anyone messaged now I realise I don't have to, I don't care if that person thinks I should reply. And I know I said hassle but that was more a turn of phrase but it's not hassle really it just makes me roll my eyes and use the block button. No one has ruined it for other men on here,in fact if anything it makes decent guys stand out .

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By *aid backMan  over a year ago

by a lake with my rod out

The best way to get replies is be really really good looking.

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By *aid backMan  over a year ago

by a lake with my rod out

The idea that anyone can ruin fab for a cohort is ridiculous. The more idiots and shite bags there are the better the decent lads look. Remember it's a competition out there and if you're looking for an easy ride go to your local boozer or niteclub because swinging has always been difficult to get meets for single guys compared to just going on the pull and its never going to change. I've been on the scene a very long time and it's always been this way

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By *ealitybitesMan  over a year ago

Belfast


"Just another aspect to look at Op

Some women / couples dont want to meet someone to close to their location anyway so ignore or block

True that. It would be handy to spell it out in the profile. I eventually got talking to a woman who told me she didn’t reply cause she didn’t want to meet anyone attached. Had she said that on her profile I would have not contact her.

I got guys who contacted me, definitely not as many messages as the ladies get, but I’ve always replied, even just with a quick “I’m not interested”. But again we’re talking a handful of replies vs hundreds.

When people list things they aren't interested in on their profiles they are accused of being negative or demanding or entitled so they can't really win.

It's always best to say on any profile what you can offer to anyone reading rather than just a list of what you want from the experience.

Maybe, but if, for example, you’re not interested in someone in particular (guys, couples, you name it), you’ll be saving both parties time stating it in your bio. "

Lots of people including me have it written as the first line of their bio that they aren't currently meeting but that doesn't stop people messaging and asking to meet.

People only see what they want to see in profiles and ignore stuff they believe doesn't apply to them.

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By *osyRedLipsWoman  over a year ago

Kildare


"Just another aspect to look at Op

Some women / couples dont want to meet someone to close to their location anyway so ignore or block

True that. It would be handy to spell it out in the profile. I eventually got talking to a woman who told me she didn’t reply cause she didn’t want to meet anyone attached. Had she said that on her profile I would have not contact her.

I got guys who contacted me, definitely not as many messages as the ladies get, but I’ve always replied, even just with a quick “I’m not interested”. But again we’re talking a handful of replies vs hundreds.

When people list things they aren't interested in on their profiles they are accused of being negative or demanding or entitled so they can't really win.

It's always best to say on any profile what you can offer to anyone reading rather than just a list of what you want from the experience.

Maybe, but if, for example, you’re not interested in someone in particular (guys, couples, you name it), you’ll be saving both parties time stating it in your bio. "

In a ideal world that would happen but a lot of time our profiles don't get read or skimmed through or just ignored. I'm very clear in my preferences I'm blunt Af on my profile. But I'll still get messages from married guys looking to meet when I point out that no attached men on my bio they usually say yeah I ignored that hope you will make a exception.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Tbh lm not really put out or upset in any way if l don't get replies simply because l don't really expect them , if l do..Great..if l don't ..it's ok too..l very very rarely send messages but when l do delve into the forums if I've read something that deserves a reply or a compliment then one is sent , to me it shows that a person has read what was written and sends a compliment to that person , it's not forum lube or anything , it's just a compliment, sometimes a reply could be sent back others no..but it's not the end of the World if a person doesn't get any replies....far from it tbh

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By *ack R OP   Man  over a year ago

galway


"

No one has ruined it for others,I've chatted to plenty of men on here who have known from the start I won't meet them. I've had more good interactions that bad on here with men. I just can't be bothered replying anymore because I don't want to if the profile or message doesn't appeal.Before I felt like I had to reply when anyone messaged now I realise I don't have to, I don't care if that person thinks I should reply. And I know I said hassle but that was more a turn of phrase but it's not hassle really it just makes me roll my eyes and use the block button. No one has ruined it for other men on here,in fact if anything it makes decent guys stand out ."

Good to hear

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By *ack R OP   Man  over a year ago

galway


"

In a ideal world that would happen but a lot of time our profiles don't get read or skimmed through or just ignored. I'm very clear in my preferences I'm blunt Af on my profile. But I'll still get messages from married guys looking to meet when I point out that no attached men on my bio they usually say yeah I ignored that hope you will make a exception. "

That’s one of the things I was referring to when I said other lads may ruin it for the rest. At least there still a good few of us reading bio. As I said, I did see your profile, read your bio and didn’t contact you. Anyway, glad you had more good interactions that bad ones

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By *ack R OP   Man  over a year ago

galway


"The idea that anyone can ruin fab for a cohort is ridiculous. The more idiots and shite bags there are the better the decent lads look. Remember it's a competition out there and if you're looking for an easy ride go to your local boozer or niteclub because swinging has always been difficult to get meets for single guys compared to just going on the pull and its never going to change. I've been on the scene a very long time and it's always been this way"

Might be an over generalisation but not ridiculous. Not looking for an easy ride. I have that. The point of the original post is how to get to talk to people in here. Clearly my approach was wrong.

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