FabSwingers.com
 

FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > Men complaining badly

Men complaining badly

Jump to: Newest in thread

 

By *panishRebel OP   Man 42 weeks ago

Alicante Spain, and Cork City Ireland

I have not been long on this site. I have a newish single profile. I have been reading the frustrations of others. In summary they are not getting to first base never mind anything more.

This is probably due to the numbers of men to both couples and women.

If it wasn't for the fact that I have previous experience on other sites abroad, I think I would be feeling the same. Would I admit it, I am not the type. I would either leave or brazen it out.

Sometimes people give helpful comments, sometimes they mention there's a forum for helping get Fabbed.

My feeling is that mostly it's a luck game. You can be as nice a guy as you want, genuine, or be an asshole.

Most are getting no where.

Like in school days, if there's one complaining there's probably a 100 staying silent.

Out of solidarity to all the genuine fellas here, I just want to say, trust the process, sometimes patience is all that's required.

Keep your cool, remain calm and your time will come.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rish_GuyMan 42 weeks ago

Foxford


"I have not been long on this site. I have a newish single profile. I have been reading the frustrations of others. In summary they are not getting to first base never mind anything more.

This is probably due to the numbers of men to both couples and women.

If it wasn't for the fact that I have previous experience on other sites abroad, I think I would be feeling the same. Would I admit it, I am not the type. I would either leave or brazen it out.

Sometimes people give helpful comments, sometimes they mention there's a forum for helping get Fabbed.

My feeling is that mostly it's a luck game. You can be as nice a guy as you want, genuine, or be an asshole.

Most are getting no where.

Like in school days, if there's one complaining there's probably a 100 staying silent.

Out of solidarity to all the genuine fellas here, I just want to say, trust the process, sometimes patience is all that's required.

Keep your cool, remain calm and your time will come.

"

True.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *razySexyCoolCorkWoman 42 weeks ago

Cork

I have met a few from the Help a Fabber threads if I've an hour to spare and it suits.

I will always have a look at their behaviour on the forums though. If they constantly complain and bitch I'd avoid because I feel I'll only be listening to that during the coffee meet too and honestly I couldn't be arsed. Also if they're argumentative with other posters I'd avoid them as well.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ofistimacatedMan 42 weeks ago

cavan town

Trigger warning. There are 3 types of guy that don't get meets here imo. the first is the type who blame everyone but themselves, don't read the threads, don't take advice and are so feckin negative in their posts. The second just couldn't be arsed to go to meet and greets (there have been plenty organised for unverified guys) "cork is too far away" "love island is on that night" boo feckin hoo. If you are serious about meeting make a feckin effort lads

Within a month of joining fab I travelled 200miles to a meet and greet in Kerry. From that i got invites to more. Was I just lucky? I believe you make your own luck.

I made an effort just the same as a lot of sound guys on here.

For the love of Jeebus, just make a effort

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago


"Trigger warning. There are 3 types of guy that don't get meets here imo. the first is the type who blame everyone but themselves, don't read the threads, don't take advice and are so feckin negative in their posts. The second just couldn't be arsed to go to meet and greets (there have been plenty organised for unverified guys) "cork is too far away" "love island is on that night" boo feckin hoo. If you are serious about meeting make a feckin effort lads

Within a month of joining fab I travelled 200miles to a meet and greet in Kerry. From that i got invites to more. Was I just lucky? I believe you make your own luck.

I made an effort just the same as a lot of sound guys on here.

For the love of Jeebus, just make a effort

"

Many guys are not here for the social side of this community, driving 200 miles to have drinks with strangers doesn't appeal to me and I think many others are the same, I have plenty of friends already, I think most just want to get down to business no pussy footing around, meeting and greeting drinking coffee and talking shite is not why most men are on fab just my opinion

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago


"I have met a few from the Help a Fabber threads if I've an hour to spare and it suits.

I will always have a look at their behaviour on the forums though. If they constantly complain and bitch I'd avoid because I feel I'll only be listening to that during the coffee meet too and honestly I couldn't be arsed. Also if they're argumentative with other posters I'd avoid them as well."

Well said .. I've met some on the help a fabber thread,and there is some threads for newbies to get verified, that's why I tell people to interact more on the forums people will get to know your personality.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ewCoupl01Couple 42 weeks ago

South Dublin

I have to say, I think this is a really good post.

Playing with a single guy isn’t our thing for the most part. There has been one or two occasions where I have hooked up with a guy on my own though. I decided to branch out because at time I was in a place where I felt like experimenting in that way, Paul was away for extended periods of time and he was comfortable with the situation.

I hadn’t really been interested in it before and even though the meets were unbelievable, I haven’t really felt the urge to meet a guy on my own since(I might at some point). So, you could say the right guys crossed my path at the right time.

“Luck” aside. there are obviously other factors that helped too. Physical attraction was there, they both had obviously read our profile, they both came across as people that I would be safe in their company, both approached us as couple and showed an interest in both our interests/personalities.

I also think it helps to be accepting of the facts of being on a swinging site, things like just because you’re on a sex site it doesn’t garuntee you the ride at the drop of the hat, we all aren’t everyone’s cup of tea and that a lot of the success that you will have in the lifestyle is aligned with how much of yourself you give to the scene. For example we’re pretty discreet and don’t attend Irish events or clubs, that hampers us connecting with good portion of the scene and enjoy the social side and that’s something we need to accept.

Sorry for the brain dump but this is just what hit me when I was reading the other thread… thank you for coming to my Ted Talk!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *panishRebel OP   Man 42 weeks ago

Alicante Spain, and Cork City Ireland


"I have to say, I think this is a really good post.

Playing with a single guy isn’t our thing for the most part. There has been one or two occasions where I have hooked up with a guy on my own though. I decided to branch out because at time I was in a place where I felt like experimenting in that way, Paul was away for extended periods of time and he was comfortable with the situation.

I hadn’t really been interested in it before and even though the meets were unbelievable, I haven’t really felt the urge to meet a guy on my own since(I might at some point). So, you could say the right guys crossed my path at the right time.

“Luck” aside. there are obviously other factors that helped too. Physical attraction was there, they both had obviously read our profile, they both came across as people that I would be safe in their company, both approached us as couple and showed an interest in both our interests/personalities.

I also think it helps to be accepting of the facts of being on a swinging site, things like just because you’re on a sex site it doesn’t garuntee you the ride at the drop of the hat, we all aren’t everyone’s cup of tea and that a lot of the success that you will have in the lifestyle is aligned with how much of yourself you give to the scene. For example we’re pretty discreet and don’t attend Irish events or clubs, that hampers us connecting with good portion of the scene and enjoy the social side and that’s something we need to accept.

Sorry for the brain dump but this is just what hit me when I was reading the other thread… thank you for coming to my Ted Talk!

"

Brain dumps are always interesting

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ust M.A.IMan 42 weeks ago

Mullingar


"

Many guys are not here for the social side of this community, driving 200 miles to have drinks with strangers doesn't appeal to me and I think many others are the same, I have plenty of friends already, I think most just want to get down to business no pussy footing around, meeting and greeting drinking coffee and talking shite is not why most men are on fab just my opinion "

I don't mind driving going to a social party, it's the best way to make connections, and meet more people that are in the scene, and you get to have fun in and out of the bedroom.

If you expect to have sex with women without putting even the smallest amount of effort, there's another site where women come straight to your door, but this ain't that place.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago


"Trigger warning. There are 3 types of guy that don't get meets here imo. the first is the type who blame everyone but themselves, don't read the threads, don't take advice and are so feckin negative in their posts. The second just couldn't be arsed to go to meet and greets (there have been plenty organised for unverified guys) "cork is too far away" "love island is on that night" boo feckin hoo. If you are serious about meeting make a feckin effort lads

Within a month of joining fab I travelled 200miles to a meet and greet in Kerry. From that i got invites to more. Was I just lucky? I believe you make your own luck.

I made an effort just the same as a lot of sound guys on here.

For the love of Jeebus, just make a effort

"

You said there are three types but only mentioned two; what's the third?

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ofistimacatedMan 42 weeks ago

cavan town


"

You said there are three types but only mentioned two; what's the third? "

Those who shall not be mentioned

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *panishRebel OP   Man 42 weeks ago

Alicante Spain, and Cork City Ireland


"

You said there are three types but only mentioned two; what's the third?

Those who shall not be mentioned "

The type who will drive 200 miles.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *electableicecreamMan 42 weeks ago

The West

I drove a 500km round trip on the weekend and had one of the best experiences of my life.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *immy123456888Man 42 weeks ago

city


"I drove a 500km round trip on the weekend and had one of the best experiences of my life.

"

What you have a 99 with a flake.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *apri 555Man 42 weeks ago

wexford or Dublin

I wasent sure of what to expect when i joined this site ,would it be the place to log on and get a quick ride ,i dident know , and it hasent been.

What it has been is a place where i have been to a social ,, met a couple of ppl for coffee meets and chatted to ppl online ,,had some fun and made some connections . For me the build up to a meet with a few chats or coffee meets makes the thrill of a play meet even more exciting ,,

So no its not dial a ride , its a hell of a lot more fun than that

Just my humble opinion

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *razySexyCoolCorkWoman 42 weeks ago

Cork


"I have met a few from the Help a Fabber threads if I've an hour to spare and it suits.

I will always have a look at their behaviour on the forums though. If they constantly complain and bitch I'd avoid because I feel I'll only be listening to that during the coffee meet too and honestly I couldn't be arsed. Also if they're argumentative with other posters I'd avoid them as well.

Well said .. I've met some on the help a fabber thread,and there is some threads for newbies to get verified, that's why I tell people to interact more on the forums people will get to know your personality."

I bet we'd pick the same few off the thread that we'd choose to meet too because they're positive and are giving off good vibes.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *electableicecreamMan 42 weeks ago

The West


"I drove a 500km round trip on the weekend and had one of the best experiences of my life.

What you have a 99 with a flake."

I was the 99

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rish_GuyMan 42 weeks ago

Foxford


"I drove a 500km round trip on the weekend and had one of the best experiences of my life.

What you have a 99 with a flake.

I was the 99 "

Did you even bother with the flake or did you share?

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *panishRebel OP   Man 42 weeks ago

Alicante Spain, and Cork City Ireland


"I wasent sure of what to expect when i joined this site ,would it be the place to log on and get a quick ride ,i dident know , and it hasent been.

What it has been is a place where i have been to a social ,, met a couple of ppl for coffee meets and chatted to ppl online ,,had some fun and made some connections . For me the build up to a meet with a few chats or coffee meets makes the thrill of a play meet even more exciting ,,

So no its not dial a ride , its a hell of a lot more fun than that

Just my humble opinion "

I totally agree.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *easingTimMan 42 weeks ago

Loughlinstown

Yes Op, there is undoubtedly far less couples and females than there are men and that's a fact of Fab life. However, if you rule out...

- the amount of male profiles with a few monosyllabic words randomly thrown together

- The amount of ice breakers sent with "Hi" "Hey hun" "Passing ur way" or "fancy a f..."

- the amount of cock pics attached to a first message (they work by the way lads so yes, keep up the good work )

...then you as a male fabber with a half decent profile, are in with a good chance of a reply, decent chat and possible coffee meet

Now, couple this with attending one social a year where you meet people, get verified and get known within a small community with the credibility that you are in fact a "genuine" guy and not just another time waster, knuckle dragging throglodyte or keyboard Romeo.

This aint rocket science here Elon

So most of those frustrated about "not getting to first base" are usually not making any effort with their profile, sending "how are you?" as ice-breakers and then going onto the forums asking for help. They then don't apply any gold nuggets or basic pointers they've been given. so, you can say it is a luck game but then again you can make your own luck here too

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *panishRebel OP   Man 42 weeks ago

Alicante Spain, and Cork City Ireland


"

Yes Op, there is undoubtedly far less couples and females than there are men and that's a fact of Fab life. However, if you rule out...

- the amount of male profiles with a few monosyllabic words randomly thrown together

- The amount of ice breakers sent with "Hi" "Hey hun" "Passing ur way" or "fancy a f..."

- the amount of cock pics attached to a first message (they work by the way lads so yes, keep up the good work )

...then you as a male fabber with a half decent profile, are in with a good chance of a reply, decent chat and possible coffee meet

Now, couple this with attending one social a year where you meet people, get verified and get known within a small community with the credibility that you are in fact a "genuine" guy and not just another time waster, knuckle dragging throglodyte or keyboard Romeo.

This aint rocket science here Elon

So most of those frustrated about "not getting to first base" are usually not making any effort with their profile, sending "how are you?" as ice-breakers and then going onto the forums asking for help. They then don't apply any gold nuggets or basic pointers they've been given. so, you can say it is a luck game but then again you can make your own luck here too "

Interesting points. I find myself agreeing though it seems harsh on someone new who just never has been to the scene and gas to figure it out.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *easingTimMan 42 weeks ago

Loughlinstown


"

Yes Op, there is undoubtedly far less couples and females than there are men and that's a fact of Fab life. However, if you rule out...

- the amount of male profiles with a few monosyllabic words randomly thrown together

- The amount of ice breakers sent with "Hi" "Hey hun" "Passing ur way" or "fancy a f..."

- the amount of cock pics attached to a first message (they work by the way lads so yes, keep up the good work )

...then you as a male fabber with a half decent profile, are in with a good chance of a reply, decent chat and possible coffee meet

Now, couple this with attending one social a year where you meet people, get verified and get known within a small community with the credibility that you are in fact a "genuine" guy and not just another time waster, knuckle dragging throglodyte or keyboard Romeo.

This aint rocket science here Elon

So most of those frustrated about "not getting to first base" are usually not making any effort with their profile, sending "how are you?" as ice-breakers and then going onto the forums asking for help. They then don't apply any gold nuggets or basic pointers they've been given. so, you can say it is a luck game but then again you can make your own luck here too

Interesting points. I find myself agreeing though it seems harsh on someone new who just never has been to the scene and gas to figure it out."

-------

Facts don't care about your feelings bro. I'm just saving a few lads a lot of pain

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ofistimacatedMan 42 weeks ago

cavan town


"

You said there are three types but only mentioned two; what's the third?

Those who shall not be mentioned

The type who will drive 200 miles. "

Well that doesn't make sense at all. I've met people off here. we are talking about people who don't meet

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *adger BrocMan 42 weeks ago

Co. Cork

Like a lot of guys on here I have to remind myself from time to time that I'm not entitled to a reply from or social or play meet with everyone that I would like to interact with.

People are as entitled to refuse or ignore as I am to ask.

I struggled in the beginning but with persistent interaction on the forums I was lucky to be accepted for a coffee meet by a Fab angel, who in the human world is a really gorgeous girl, and I was on my way. I have since met a select few Fab friends and have had some very enjoyable social meets and some amazing play meets.

Persistence, patience and respect are the by words for success on here imho.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *panishRebel OP   Man 42 weeks ago

Alicante Spain, and Cork City Ireland

Reading through the comments, I found it interesting how a few mentioned that they monitor how a new single conducts themselves on the forum, and if they come across as argumentative or pleasant etc.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *itemeagainMan 42 weeks ago

Wexford


"I have not been long on this site. I have a newish single profile. I have been reading the frustrations of others. In summary they are not getting to first base never mind anything more.

This is probably due to the numbers of men to both couples and women.

If it wasn't for the fact that I have previous experience on other sites abroad, I think I would be feeling the same. Would I admit it, I am not the type. I would either leave or brazen it out.

Sometimes people give helpful comments, sometimes they mention there's a forum for helping get Fabbed.

My feeling is that mostly it's a luck game. You can be as nice a guy as you want, genuine, or be an asshole.

Most are getting no where.

Like in school days, if there's one complaining there's probably a 100 staying silent.

Out of solidarity to all the genuine fellas here, I just want to say, trust the process, sometimes patience is all that's required.

Keep your cool, remain calm and your time will come.

"

Or get yourself out and about cause irl people arnt half as dismissive and pedestals aren't half as common

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *itemeagainMan 42 weeks ago

Wexford


"Trigger warning. There are 3 types of guy that don't get meets here imo. the first is the type who blame everyone but themselves, don't read the threads, don't take advice and are so feckin negative in their posts. The second just couldn't be arsed to go to meet and greets (there have been plenty organised for unverified guys) "cork is too far away" "love island is on that night" boo feckin hoo. If you are serious about meeting make a feckin effort lads

Within a month of joining fab I travelled 200miles to a meet and greet in Kerry. From that i got invites to more. Was I just lucky? I believe you make your own luck.

I made an effort just the same as a lot of sound guys on here.

For the love of Jeebus, just make a effort

Many guys are not here for the social side of this community, driving 200 miles to have drinks with strangers doesn't appeal to me and I think many others are the same, I have plenty of friends already, I think most just want to get down to business no pussy footing around, meeting and greeting drinking coffee and talking shite is not why most men are on fab just my opinion "

Very true ...

Also whats the third type of guy

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *heBlowinsCouple 42 weeks ago

West Cork

Some of us don't give a toss about verifications or (sometimes) profile quality but amen to what's been said about effort.

It's amazing how many lads think the virtual equivalent of walking up to someone in the pub with their cock out will get them anywhere. That being said, it actually does sometimes work

What OP said about luck is VERY true, at least I'm our experience. I (Mr.) chat to far too many people and whenever we end up meeting, it's almost always down to whomever happens to be available and within our sphere of attention at that point in time. It not a "take a number" queue that some lads think it is.. just lucky alignment.

So persistence and effort are great but they're not everything. And neither are the socials or verifications necessarily. Depends on what you're going for here.

But 10/10 people being douchebags in the forums (or anywhere else) get an instablock

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *heBlowinsCouple 42 weeks ago

West Cork


"Reading through the comments, I found it interesting how a few mentioned that they monitor how a new single conducts themselves on the forum, and if they come across as argumentative or pleasant etc.

"

This is 100% accurate for many of us

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *itemeagainMan 42 weeks ago

Wexford


"

Yes Op, there is undoubtedly far less couples and females than there are men and that's a fact of Fab life. However, if you rule out...

- the amount of male profiles with a few monosyllabic words randomly thrown together

- The amount of ice breakers sent with "Hi" "Hey hun" "Passing ur way" or "fancy a f..."

- the amount of cock pics attached to a first message (they work by the way lads so yes, keep up the good work )

...then you as a male fabber with a half decent profile, are in with a good chance of a reply, decent chat and possible coffee meet

Now, couple this with attending one social a year where you meet people, get verified and get known within a small community with the credibility that you are in fact a "genuine" guy and not just another time waster, knuckle dragging throglodyte or keyboard Romeo.

This aint rocket science here Elon

So most of those frustrated about "not getting to first base" are usually not making any effort with their profile, sending "how are you?" as ice-breakers and then going onto the forums asking for help. They then don't apply any gold nuggets or basic pointers they've been given. so, you can say it is a luck game but then again you can make your own luck here too

Interesting points. I find myself agreeing though it seems harsh on someone new who just never has been to the scene and gas to figure it out."

It seems that fab is more about the social side and from what's being said here , its difficult to meet people if you don't participate in this social side ... for some the social side , the spending all weekend driving ,, putting in months of chatting ,, getting verified by people you have no intention seeing again just isn't what their looking for . They either have a social life and things to spend their time on or don't need all the social side of fab . They just want casual fun and exploration... it seems fab caters less for this than many joining know !

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *heBlowinsCouple 42 weeks ago

West Cork


"

Yes Op, there is undoubtedly far less couples and females than there are men and that's a fact of Fab life. However, if you rule out...

- the amount of male profiles with a few monosyllabic words randomly thrown together

- The amount of ice breakers sent with "Hi" "Hey hun" "Passing ur way" or "fancy a f..."

- the amount of cock pics attached to a first message (they work by the way lads so yes, keep up the good work )

...then you as a male fabber with a half decent profile, are in with a good chance of a reply, decent chat and possible coffee meet

Now, couple this with attending one social a year where you meet people, get verified and get known within a small community with the credibility that you are in fact a "genuine" guy and not just another time waster, knuckle dragging throglodyte or keyboard Romeo.

This aint rocket science here Elon

So most of those frustrated about "not getting to first base" are usually not making any effort with their profile, sending "how are you?" as ice-breakers and then going onto the forums asking for help. They then don't apply any gold nuggets or basic pointers they've been given. so, you can say it is a luck game but then again you can make your own luck here too

Interesting points. I find myself agreeing though it seems harsh on someone new who just never has been to the scene and gas to figure it out.

It seems that fab is more about the social side and from what's being said here , its difficult to meet people if you don't participate in this social side ... for some the social side , the spending all weekend driving ,, putting in months of chatting ,, getting verified by people you have no intention seeing again just isn't what their looking for . They either have a social life and things to spend their time on or don't need all the social side of fab . They just want casual fun and exploration... it seems fab caters less for this than many joining know !"

I think this is largely a cultural thing (especially in Ireland) and depends on if you really want to be a part of the swinger scene. A fair few of us don't care about the social side and don't participate in it

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *itemeagainMan 42 weeks ago

Wexford


"

Yes Op, there is undoubtedly far less couples and females than there are men and that's a fact of Fab life. However, if you rule out...

- the amount of male profiles with a few monosyllabic words randomly thrown together

- The amount of ice breakers sent with "Hi" "Hey hun" "Passing ur way" or "fancy a f..."

- the amount of cock pics attached to a first message (they work by the way lads so yes, keep up the good work )

...then you as a male fabber with a half decent profile, are in with a good chance of a reply, decent chat and possible coffee meet

Now, couple this with attending one social a year where you meet people, get verified and get known within a small community with the credibility that you are in fact a "genuine" guy and not just another time waster, knuckle dragging throglodyte or keyboard Romeo.

This aint rocket science here Elon

So most of those frustrated about "not getting to first base" are usually not making any effort with their profile, sending "how are you?" as ice-breakers and then going onto the forums asking for help. They then don't apply any gold nuggets or basic pointers they've been given. so, you can say it is a luck game but then again you can make your own luck here too

Interesting points. I find myself agreeing though it seems harsh on someone new who just never has been to the scene and gas to figure it out.

It seems that fab is more about the social side and from what's being said here , its difficult to meet people if you don't participate in this social side ... for some the social side , the spending all weekend driving ,, putting in months of chatting ,, getting verified by people you have no intention seeing again just isn't what their looking for . They either have a social life and things to spend their time on or don't need all the social side of fab . They just want casual fun and exploration... it seems fab caters less for this than many joining know !

I think this is largely a cultural thing (especially in Ireland) and depends on if you really want to be a part of the swinger scene. A fair few of us don't care about the social side and don't participate in it "

I think I want to meet more of yous

Yes it dose seem the culture kinda thing ... bit like gaa

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *LIVEANDKICKING100Man 42 weeks ago

DUBLIN

I first heard of this site just as Covid broke. I've been and gone and come back. I take a far more relaxed approach since I rejoined and have no expectations. Even though I have not changed the general opening message text too much I have been at least getting more replies to messages-perhaps my messages come across as relaxed-I don't know! I finally did manage to connect with a fine woman who I see from time to time as opportunities arise. I'm still in touch by text etc with some other ladies. Reading both the forums and profiles it is quite clear that the following seems to apply:

Many men send dick pics thinking it's what the women want to see in their inbox!

Many women get messaged late at night with dumb messages like ''I'm half a mile away in a hotel near you, Would you fancy a fuck? The fact that a man is so dim to think this will work really makes all of us look dim!

Many men get rude and aggressive if a woman says no thanks or doesn't reply.

Many men send multiple messages one after another-bombardment-if they don't get a reply. I don't do bombardments but can be guilty of sending a further message after a time lapse-I might follow up 6 weeks or 3 months later if I rediscover a nice profile that I have messaged some time in the past. But it's usually only two messages and a big gap. After that, I give up.

Men don't seem to realise there 100s of us on here and not hundreds of ladies so they can pick and choose as they wish.

Sending a message does not entitle you to a reply! I've read that women get 100s of messages so can't and don't read them all. My only advice-be patient, be polite and have a decent profile!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *electableicecreamMan 42 weeks ago

The West

What's clear from this and many other threads like it is that there are many, many approaches to getting meets for a single guy.

Forum's, web/cam chat, direct messaging, socials, parties, clubs, having a well thought out profile, and just being in the right place at the right time.

Something that I don't see mentioned very often is having a plan and perhaps more importantly, some standards and self respect.

Do you know that you want? Is it connection or friction or kink or swinging or furries?

Have you thought about how to get that given all the options and advice available to you?

Have you tried everything?

Is it still not working?

Why are you still here?

I don't have any useful advice to give that I think would help except maybe...

Don't moan unless you're already in bed.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *panishRebel OP   Man 42 weeks ago

Alicante Spain, and Cork City Ireland


"I first heard of this site just as Covid broke. I've been and gone and come back. I take a far more relaxed approach since I rejoined and have no expectations. Even though I have not changed the general opening message text too much I have been at least getting more replies to messages-perhaps my messages come across as relaxed-I don't know! I finally did manage to connect with a fine woman who I see from time to time as opportunities arise. I'm still in touch by text etc with some other ladies. Reading both the forums and profiles it is quite clear that the following seems to apply:

Many men send dick pics thinking it's what the women want to see in their inbox!

Many women get messaged late at night with dumb messages like ''I'm half a mile away in a hotel near you, Would you fancy a fuck? The fact that a man is so dim to think this will work really makes all of us look dim!

Many men get rude and aggressive if a woman says no thanks or doesn't reply.

Many men send multiple messages one after another-bombardment-if they don't get a reply. I don't do bombardments but can be guilty of sending a further message after a time lapse-I might follow up 6 weeks or 3 months later if I rediscover a nice profile that I have messaged some time in the past. But it's usually only two messages and a big gap. After that, I give up.

Men don't seem to realise there 100s of us on here and not hundreds of ladies so they can pick and choose as they wish.

Sending a message does not entitle you to a reply! I've read that women get 100s of messages so can't and don't read them all. My only advice-be patient, be polite and have a decent profile!

"

Yep nicely put.

I wonder do men bombard because they text when d*unk?

My own private rule is don't text when d*unk, even on WhatsApp etc

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *electableicecreamMan 42 weeks ago

The West


"

Yep nicely put.

I wonder do men bombard because they text when d*unk?

My own private rule is don't text when d*unk, even on WhatsApp etc

"

Probably a lot of one handed typing going on too.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *itemeagainMan 42 weeks ago

Wexford

I would actually wager that the amount of cock pics and bombarding is far lower that maintained on the forums

Its a place where repetition is fuel for fact

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *panishRebel OP   Man 42 weeks ago

Alicante Spain, and Cork City Ireland


"I would actually wager that the amount of cock pics and bombarding is far lower that maintained on the forums

Its a place where repetition is fuel for fact "

I have looked at my lovers new profile. Really the dick pics aren't a myth.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago


"I would actually wager that the amount of cock pics and bombarding is far lower that maintained on the forums

Its a place where repetition is fuel for fact

I have looked at my lovers new profile. Really the dick pics aren't a myth."

Filters if you’re lover doesn’t want them tell her use them

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *panishRebel OP   Man 42 weeks ago

Alicante Spain, and Cork City Ireland


"I would actually wager that the amount of cock pics and bombarding is far lower that maintained on the forums

Its a place where repetition is fuel for fact

I have looked at my lovers new profile. Really the dick pics aren't a myth.

Filters if you’re lover doesn’t want them tell her use them "

Yea we got there eventually. ????

But it was an eye opener for me.

We had a good laugh about it.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rish_GuyMan 42 weeks ago

Foxford


"I would actually wager that the amount of cock pics and bombarding is far lower that maintained on the forums

Its a place where repetition is fuel for fact

I have looked at my lovers new profile. Really the dick pics aren't a myth.

Filters if you’re lover doesn’t want them tell her use them

Yea we got there eventually. ????

But it was an eye opener for me.

We had a good laugh about it."

I bet it's not & also I bet ye had aswell.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ildarekinkstersCouple 42 weeks ago

kinkytown

Funny thing about the guys who complain or are just negative in general is they get no where. If you don't know how the game is played here there's no point in playing. Guys that know the game end up with lots of meets and verifications which lead to more meets while negative ones end up sitting on the one verification for nearly a year.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *omtom7Man 42 weeks ago

Tralee

Never sure what the pissing and moaning is meant to achieve. I doubt any of the posters get inundated with requests afterwards. Like Kildare said above, gotta play the system and understand what the site is for.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *adforsexMan 42 weeks ago

Santry


"Trigger warning. There are 3 types of guy that don't get meets here imo. the first is the type who blame everyone but themselves, don't read the threads, don't take advice and are so feckin negative in their posts. The second just couldn't be arsed to go to meet and greets (there have been plenty organised for unverified guys) "cork is too far away" "love island is on that night" boo feckin hoo. If you are serious about meeting make a feckin effort lads

Within a month of joining fab I travelled 200miles to a meet and greet in Kerry. From that i got invites to more. Was I just lucky? I believe you make your own luck.

I made an effort just the same as a lot of sound guys on here.

For the love of Jeebus, just make a effort

Many guys are not here for the social side of this community, driving 200 miles to have drinks with strangers doesn't appeal to me and I think many others are the same, I have plenty of friends already, I think most just want to get down to business no pussy footing around, meeting and greeting drinking coffee and talking shite is not why most men are on fab just my opinion "

same that's my problem I've plenty friends not here to mix and talk shit with load strangers problem with Ireland swing scence think British one more you get down action I seen some instead pay for drinks and food you just pay to get down to business lol

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *adforsexMan 42 weeks ago

Santry


"Trigger warning. There are 3 types of guy that don't get meets here imo. the first is the type who blame everyone but themselves, don't read the threads, don't take advice and are so feckin negative in their posts. The second just couldn't be arsed to go to meet and greets (there have been plenty organised for unverified guys) "cork is too far away" "love island is on that night" boo feckin hoo. If you are serious about meeting make a feckin effort lads

Within a month of joining fab I travelled 200miles to a meet and greet in Kerry. From that i got invites to more. Was I just lucky? I believe you make your own luck.

I made an effort just the same as a lot of sound guys on here.

For the love of Jeebus, just make a effort

Many guys are not here for the social side of this community, driving 200 miles to have drinks with strangers doesn't appeal to me and I think many others are the same, I have plenty of friends already, I think most just want to get down to business no pussy footing around, meeting and greeting drinking coffee and talking shite is not why most men are on fab just my opinion "

100% most women treat it like dating site as well have list long your arm what they want in guy lmao

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago

I'm unsure why being fussy about who you want to fuck is so hilarious.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *andR2019Couple 42 weeks ago

Nunya


"Trigger warning. There are 3 types of guy that don't get meets here imo. the first is the type who blame everyone but themselves, don't read the threads, don't take advice and are so feckin negative in their posts. The second just couldn't be arsed to go to meet and greets (there have been plenty organised for unverified guys) "cork is too far away" "love island is on that night" boo feckin hoo. If you are serious about meeting make a feckin effort lads

Within a month of joining fab I travelled 200miles to a meet and greet in Kerry. From that i got invites to more. Was I just lucky? I believe you make your own luck.

I made an effort just the same as a lot of sound guys on here.

For the love of Jeebus, just make a effort

Many guys are not here for the social side of this community, driving 200 miles to have drinks with strangers doesn't appeal to me and I think many others are the same, I have plenty of friends already, I think most just want to get down to business no pussy footing around, meeting and greeting drinking coffee and talking shite is not why most men are on fab just my opinion same that's my problem I've plenty friends not here to mix and talk shit with load strangers problem with Ireland swing scence think British one more you get down action I seen some instead pay for drinks and food you just pay to get down to business lol "

We are both Scottish and the scene on the mainland is by in large the exact same as it is here. There’s more people so greater chance of getting someone who more keen to get down to business as you said than the ones who are looking for chemistry and vibe.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *andR2019Couple 42 weeks ago

Nunya


"Trigger warning. There are 3 types of guy that don't get meets here imo. the first is the type who blame everyone but themselves, don't read the threads, don't take advice and are so feckin negative in their posts. The second just couldn't be arsed to go to meet and greets (there have been plenty organised for unverified guys) "cork is too far away" "love island is on that night" boo feckin hoo. If you are serious about meeting make a feckin effort lads

Within a month of joining fab I travelled 200miles to a meet and greet in Kerry. From that i got invites to more. Was I just lucky? I believe you make your own luck.

I made an effort just the same as a lot of sound guys on here.

For the love of Jeebus, just make a effort

Many guys are not here for the social side of this community, driving 200 miles to have drinks with strangers doesn't appeal to me and I think many others are the same, I have plenty of friends already, I think most just want to get down to business no pussy footing around, meeting and greeting drinking coffee and talking shite is not why most men are on fab just my opinion 100% most women treat it like dating site as well have list long your arm what they want in guy lmao "

Well that’s their prerogative, this is a swinging site not a sex site, there’s more to the lifestyle than sleeping with the first guy or women that pays to attention. As a man I’ve more on my list of wants from any women we meet than the female half has and that’s ok as it’s our choice.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *og-ManMan 42 weeks ago

somewhere

The men complaining that they're not here for this or that and that they just want sex

How's that working out if you're being honest

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *eijaWoman 42 weeks ago

City Centre


"

Yes Op, there is undoubtedly far less couples and females than there are men and that's a fact of Fab life. However, if you rule out...

- the amount of male profiles with a few monosyllabic words randomly thrown together

- The amount of ice breakers sent with "Hi" "Hey hun" "Passing ur way" or "fancy a f..."

- the amount of cock pics attached to a first message (they work by the way lads so yes, keep up the good work )

...then you as a male fabber with a half decent profile, are in with a good chance of a reply, decent chat and possible coffee meet

Now, couple this with attending one social a year where you meet people, get verified and get known within a small community with the credibility that you are in fact a "genuine" guy and not just another time waster, knuckle dragging throglodyte or keyboard Romeo.

This aint rocket science here Elon

So most of those frustrated about "not getting to first base" are usually not making any effort with their profile, sending "how are you?" as ice-breakers and then going onto the forums asking for help. They then don't apply any gold nuggets or basic pointers they've been given. so, you can say it is a luck game but then again you can make your own luck here too "

Well said...you get out of the scene the effort you put in

There are so many amazing single guys who do well on the scene because:

They put effort into their bios/pics

They engage with profiles and actually chat normally. This maybe a swing site but you cannot beat a good conversation!

They attend events...put themselves out there and meet people even if it is outside their comfort zone. I've said it a million times, Socials are the best way to meet people for future adventures. I don't think I have one single male friend that ever regretted taking that step....

B x

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ofusplusCouple 42 weeks ago

Limerick

Lots of good advice on this thread. People forget that this is a swinging site. Swinging is technically not about sex. It's a lifestyle of openness, tolerance and liberty where sex is just a part of it.

We love giving the two fingers to societal norms which frown on harmless stuff like this.

There are other sites better suited to hookups if that is what you are after. Good luck.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *electableicecreamMan 42 weeks ago

The West


"Lots of good advice on this thread. People forget that this is a swinging site. Swinging is technically not about sex. It's a lifestyle of openness, tolerance and liberty where sex is just a part of it.

We love giving the two fingers to societal norms which frown on harmless stuff like this.

There are other sites better suited to hookups if that is what you are after. Good luck."

This

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *eijaWoman 42 weeks ago

City Centre


"Trigger warning. There are 3 types of guy that don't get meets here imo. the first is the type who blame everyone but themselves, don't read the threads, don't take advice and are so feckin negative in their posts. The second just couldn't be arsed to go to meet and greets (there have been plenty organised for unverified guys) "cork is too far away" "love island is on that night" boo feckin hoo. If you are serious about meeting make a feckin effort lads

Within a month of joining fab I travelled 200miles to a meet and greet in Kerry. From that i got invites to more. Was I just lucky? I believe you make your own luck.

I made an effort just the same as a lot of sound guys on here.

For the love of Jeebus, just make a effort

Many guys are not here for the social side of this community, driving 200 miles to have drinks with strangers doesn't appeal to me and I think many others are the same, I have plenty of friends already, I think most just want to get down to business no pussy footing around, meeting and greeting drinking coffee and talking shite is not why most men are on fab just my opinion 100% most women treat it like dating site as well have list long your arm what they want in guy lmao "

It's called having standards

Would you jump into bed with just anyone? Actually maybe don't answer that....

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago

I agree be patient and gentle or not is she want otherwise

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *panishRebel OP   Man 42 weeks ago

Alicante Spain, and Cork City Ireland


"Trigger warning. There are 3 types of guy that don't get meets here imo. the first is the type who blame everyone but themselves, don't read the threads, don't take advice and are so feckin negative in their posts. The second just couldn't be arsed to go to meet and greets (there have been plenty organised for unverified guys) "cork is too far away" "love island is on that night" boo feckin hoo. If you are serious about meeting make a feckin effort lads

Within a month of joining fab I travelled 200miles to a meet and greet in Kerry. From that i got invites to more. Was I just lucky? I believe you make your own luck.

I made an effort just the same as a lot of sound guys on here.

For the love of Jeebus, just make a effort

Many guys are not here for the social side of this community, driving 200 miles to have drinks with strangers doesn't appeal to me and I think many others are the same, I have plenty of friends already, I think most just want to get down to business no pussy footing around, meeting and greeting drinking coffee and talking shite is not why most men are on fab just my opinion 100% most women treat it like dating site as well have list long your arm what they want in guy lmao

It's called having standards

Would you jump into bed with just anyone? Actually maybe don't answer that...."

Passing standards is part of the fun.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago


"Lots of good advice on this thread. People forget that this is a swinging site. Swinging is technically not about sex. It's a lifestyle of openness, tolerance and liberty where sex is just a part of it.

We love giving the two fingers to societal norms which frown on harmless stuff like this.

There are other sites better suited to hookups if that is what you are after. Good luck."

Will you maybe be able to provide such sites?

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *electableicecreamMan 42 weeks ago

The West


"

Will you maybe be able to provide such sites? "

Tinder, match, hinge, bumble, feeld, POF.

Probably missed one or two

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ofusplusCouple 42 weeks ago

Limerick


"Lots of good advice on this thread. People forget that this is a swinging site. Swinging is technically not about sex. It's a lifestyle of openness, tolerance and liberty where sex is just a part of it.

We love giving the two fingers to societal norms which frown on harmless stuff like this.

There are other sites better suited to hookups if that is what you are after. Good luck.

Will you maybe be able to provide such sites? "

I'm out of the dating scene for far too long to know but the above poster seems to have covered quite a few of them.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *electableicecreamMan 42 weeks ago

The West


"

I'm out of the dating scene for far too long to know but the above poster seems to have covered quite a few of them."

I'd rather scoop my own eyes out than submit to algorithmic dating again but I have a Fab friend that says Feeld is looking pretty decent for people who want to explore alternatives to regular dating and meet people who want to hook up.

Feeld is also young enough as a company that it's still in the attract the users cycle of the corporate enshitification cycle.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago

The ladies have the pick of the crop.like being in a candy shop.us poor guy have it hard..

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ealitybitesMan 42 weeks ago

Belfast

All the way back to the op and the thread title.

Is there ever a good way to complain?

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ichael McCarthyMan 42 weeks ago

Lucan


"All the way back to the op and the thread title.

Is there ever a good way to complain?

"

Yes, with a lump hammer and a balaclava. The cunts will make sure not to give me smoked cod when I ask for fresh cod the next time

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *panishRebel OP   Man 42 weeks ago

Alicante Spain, and Cork City Ireland


"All the way back to the op and the thread title.

Is there ever a good way to complain?

Yes, with a lump hammer and a balaclava. The cunts will make sure not to give me smoked cod when I ask for fresh cod the next time "

Smoked instead of fresh is a serious offence alright. You'd be justified becoming a vigilante for better fish service....

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *3nsesMan 42 weeks ago

Dublin

If a single man can't get the ride on fab it's because of self-inflicted reasons. It's not difficult.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ichael McCarthyMan 42 weeks ago

Lucan


"All the way back to the op and the thread title.

Is there ever a good way to complain?

Yes, with a lump hammer and a balaclava. The cunts will make sure not to give me smoked cod when I ask for fresh cod the next time

Smoked instead of fresh is a serious offence alright. You'd be justified becoming a vigilante for better fish service...."

It has to be one of the most disappointing things that can happen in life, or in a chipper at least.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *itemeagainMan 42 weeks ago

Wexford


"Lots of good advice on this thread. People forget that this is a swinging site. Swinging is technically not about sex. It's a lifestyle of openness, tolerance and liberty where sex is just a part of it.

We love giving the two fingers to societal norms which frown on harmless stuff like this.

There are other sites better suited to hookups if that is what you are after. Good luck."

Honestly,,, someone needs to tell a lot of peeps on here that its about tolerance

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rishOak12Man 42 weeks ago

D

This man has hit the nail on the head with this post. Just thought I’d throw that in there and side out again lol

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

  

By *ichael McCarthyMan 42 weeks ago

Lucan


"Lots of good advice on this thread. People forget that this is a swinging site. Swinging is technically not about sex. It's a lifestyle of openness, tolerance and liberty where sex is just a part of it.

We love giving the two fingers to societal norms which frown on harmless stuff like this.

There are other sites better suited to hookups if that is what you are after. Good luck.

Honestly,,, someone needs to tell a lot of peeps on here that its about tolerance "

Meh. There's only so much tolerance a man can take

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

» Add a new message to this topic

0.1249

0