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Actual genuine question....

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Would anybody here be willing to share their own personal interpretation of what love actually is?

Honestly curious...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Love making or the other love side

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Love making or the other love side "

The romantic Western definition of love....

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Tbh nowadays I have absolutely no bloody idea

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

The older I get the less sure I am. If you find out, let me know will u?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Offering up the last rollo?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Caring enough about someone to try to meet their needs.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Tbh nowadays I have absolutely no bloody idea "

You and me both sister....

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Love making or the other love side

The romantic Western definition of love.... "

ahh I gotcha I suspose being there as friends an soul mates an in ill an in sickness if your deeply in love everything is always second place love comes first if the love is there of course between both. Real love takes time in my opinion however in some cases its first sight an thats great. But I do feel love takes time love hits a few rocks but in the end there's only 2 fighters at the end the lovers. That's my kinda view on it if it makes sense

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"The older I get the less sure I am. If you find out, let me know will u? "

Nah, I'll be too loved up

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Never been in love so can't say.

But I know I have friends who love me for me.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Love is knowing you'd do anything for that someone!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Love is knowing you'd do anything for that someone! "

See that's kinda creepy. That's more obsession, no?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Love is knowing you'd do anything for that someone!

See that's kinda creepy. That's more obsession, no? "

No I don't think so,I don't mean to the point of killing someone just because they say so!

More that they are the number one priority!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Caring enough for someone enough to think about their wellbeing before your own, feeling happy and calm from just looking at them, trusting that someone with every darkest secret of your soul.

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By *rmrs1234Couple  over a year ago

Waterford

Hard to explain. My hubs is my friend and soul mate. I kind of knew he was special when i first met him. I feel sick at the thought of something happening to him. His feelings and wellbeing is first and foremost for me. I feel safe and complete with him.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Caring enough for someone enough to think about their wellbeing before your own, feeling happy and calm from just looking at them, trusting that someone with every darkest secret of your soul. "

Yep,that's what I meant to say!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Caring enough for someone enough to think about their wellbeing before your own, feeling happy and calm from just looking at them, trusting that someone with every darkest secret of your soul. "

That's me rightly fucked so

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

My experience has been that romantic love provides a mirror of the self, the accepted parts which result in that wonderful feeling of being safe and accepted and understood.

And then also a space to face the unaccepted parts which surface in times of challenge and conflict and provide an opportunity to plunge deeper into connection with oneself through another.

Or break up if either party isn't able/ willing to go to those places within themselves!!!

Not a very Hollywood description, but it's been awesome. And has brought me to places of challenge and peace and beyond old patterns and defenses like nothing else I've experienced.

And the journey continues and I count my blessings that I can love and be loved by someone who embraces the wonder and braves the storms.

Laura

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

As you're alluding to, OP, I think the word "love" can be too universal to a fault. If that makes sense.

Not just that one person's definition may differ to another's but that the actual emotions we each feel evoke and represent it can differ just as easily.

I do feel, however, that for me vulnerability is a cornerstone to any feeling of it. Not only allowing yourself to be so open with and to someone else but trusting them to understand you. To build you up rather than ever knock you down.

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By *eddy and legsCouple  over a year ago

the wetlands

You'll know it when you find it and if you have to ask you haven't

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"You'll know it when you find it and if you have to ask you haven't"

Pfft. Respectfully, bullshit.

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By *etergemmaCouple  over a year ago

South Dublin Area

When you love someone so much and they are taken from you, you think about them the moment you wake up and the last moment you fall a sleep.. thats love or maybe grief

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I don't know why you're not fair

I give you my love, but you don't care

So what is right and what is wrong?

Gimme a sign

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"When you love someone so much and they are taken from you, you think about them the moment you wake up and the last moment you fall a sleep.. thats love or maybe grief "

Yep!

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By *etite_RosyWoman  over a year ago

Now in MALAGA (SPAIN)


"Would anybody here be willing to share their own personal interpretation of what love actually is?

Honestly curious... "

In a nutshell: love is everything you need to live your life. It gives you a power, motivation, understanding, support, long talks, cuddles, sex etc...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"When you love someone so much and they are taken from you, you think about them the moment you wake up and the last moment you fall a sleep.. thats love or maybe grief

Yep!"

Grief is love that you can not longer give

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

A woman only falls in love with a man's lifestyle, this why a man who has a good business, a nice home and a big fat wallet will never have difficulties attracting women. You could be a total psychopath, or be terribly dull and boring, but once you have the trappings of success you're always gonna have a never ending stream of women queuing up...

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By *eddy and legsCouple  over a year ago

the wetlands


"A woman only falls in love with a man's lifestyle, this why a man who has a good business, a nice home and a big fat wallet will never have difficulties attracting women. You could be a total psychopath, or be terribly dull and boring, but once you have the trappings of success you're always gonna have a never ending stream of women queuing up... "

I think you'll find that's a man's excuse for not finding love

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By *eddy and legsCouple  over a year ago

the wetlands


"You'll know it when you find it and if you have to ask you haven't

Pfft. Respectfully, bullshit. "

Says the man who wrote a page of bullshit and called it a profile lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"The older I get the less sure I am. If you find out, let me know will u?

Nah, I'll be too loved up "

Harsh

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"A woman only falls in love with a man's lifestyle, this why a man who has a good business, a nice home and a big fat wallet will never have difficulties attracting women. You could be a total psychopath, or be terribly dull and boring, but once you have the trappings of success you're always gonna have a never ending stream of women queuing up... "

Always full of surprises this guy.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think maybe there's different kinds of love. Some burn hot and fast, others are slower and build over time. Some aren't meant to last but leave a lasting impression anyway. Others are lifelong and become the foundation of a life shared in partnership. Some drain you and leave you broken into shards of who you once were. And (hopefully, although I've not experienced it) some ignite a light so bright in you that it never stops shining. Who the fuck knows.

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By *ireandsaltCouple  over a year ago

midlands

Wine comes in at the mouth,

Love comes in at the eye.

That’s all we shall know for truth,

Before we grow old and die.

I lift the glass to my mouth,

I look at you and I sigh.

W B Yeats.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Leave any romantic notions of women in your teenage years where they belong. Adult women only see men purely for their utilitarian value.

I personally know lots of guys who were blissfully unaware their wives had met a another guy, until they were kicked unceremoniously to the left kerb like dirt when their wives had a firm hold on their next victim.

It's just female nature, shaped by millions of years of evolution and natural selection... Darwinism in it's very essence.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Leave any romantic notions of women in your teenage years where they belong. Adult women only see men purely for their utilitarian value.

I personally know lots of guys who were blissfully unaware their wives had met a another guy, until they were kicked unceremoniously to the left kerb like dirt when their wives had a firm hold on their next victim.

It's just female nature, shaped by millions of years of evolution and natural selection... Darwinism in it's very essence. "

Love is giving someone the power to destroy you and trusting them not too

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Leave any romantic notions of women in your teenage years where they belong. Adult women only see men purely for their utilitarian value.

I personally know lots of guys who were blissfully unaware their wives had met a another guy, until they were kicked unceremoniously to the left kerb like dirt when their wives had a firm hold on their next victim.

It's just female nature, shaped by millions of years of evolution and natural selection... Darwinism in it's very essence. "

AHH ..so you're saying they used the wrong type in " PREDATOR "...you reckon a female would have been a better choice than the Alien ???

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Huge difference between " Love " and being " in Love "...of which l am neither at this exact moment in my life and for the forseeable future...." What's love got to do got to do with it ?...what's love but a second hand emotion ...who needs a heart when a heart can be broken "....Tina was right ...Love ?....totally overrated and a word wayyyyyyyyyy over used .

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Leave any romantic notions of women in your teenage years where they belong. Adult women only see men purely for their utilitarian value.

I personally know lots of guys who were blissfully unaware their wives had met a another guy, until they were kicked unceremoniously to the left kerb like dirt when their wives had a firm hold on their next victim.

It's just female nature, shaped by millions of years of evolution and natural selection... Darwinism in it's very essence. "

I bet your fun at parties.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"

Says the man who wrote a page of bullshit and called it a profile lol "

You're the sensitive type ain't ya?!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"

Love is giving someone the power to destroy you and trusting them not too"

That seems to be a common theme here - love being placing absolute 'power' over your emotional well being to another - you used the word destroy, I'm not entirely comfortable with the definition of 'love' (something supposed to be so pure and good) being implicitly tied to something as negative as destruction. Whether utilised or not.

I guess I prefer to interpret love, or partnership, as something explicitly positive.

Might be a bit naive, well, a lot naive, but I'd like to think that love elevates those who partake. It makes the days brighter. Makes the burdens easier. When one falls, their love(rs) should carry them, safe in the knowledge that when it's their turn they'll do the carrying. It's being loyal, sharing a life, helping one another through difficulties, inspiring confidence, celebrating achievements, nurturing self esteem and ambition. In short; we'd have each others backs.

Yeah, fair it's pretty Hallmark. But I'm a soft cunt....

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By *eductively_SweetWoman  over a year ago

wexford

My uncle once told me love is an itch at the back of your heart that you can't scratch. No matter how hard try.. lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I like the way it was put in the film The Wedding Crashers.

Love is yours souls recognition of its counterpart in another

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By *etergemmaCouple  over a year ago

South Dublin Area


"My uncle once told me love is an itch at the back of your heart that you can't scratch. No matter how hard try.. lol "
i like that

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I like the way it was put in the film The Wedding Crashers.

Love is yours souls recognition of its counterpart in another "

Wasn't that also the film that treated sexual assault as a joke?!

It's such a weird little movie

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I like the way it was put in the film The Wedding Crashers.

Love is yours souls recognition of its counterpart in another

Wasn't that also the film that treated sexual assault as a joke?!

It's such a weird little movie "

Lol it has its good moments though

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I like the way it was put in the film The Wedding Crashers.

Love is yours souls recognition of its counterpart in another

Wasn't that also the film that treated sexual assault as a joke?!

It's such a weird little movie

Lol it has its good moments though "

Mainly Isla Fisher

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Leave any romantic notions of women in your teenage years where they belong. Adult women only see men purely for their utilitarian value.

I personally know lots of guys who were blissfully unaware their wives had met a another guy, until they were kicked unceremoniously to the left kerb like dirt when their wives had a firm hold on their next victim.

It's just female nature, shaped by millions of years of evolution and natural selection... Darwinism in it's very essence.

I bet your fun at parties. "

You're assuming he's ever invited to any- which would doubt

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Love is giving someone the power to destroy you and trusting them not too

That seems to be a common theme here - love being placing absolute 'power' over your emotional well being to another - you used the word destroy, I'm not entirely comfortable with the definition of 'love' (something supposed to be so pure and good) being implicitly tied to something as negative as destruction. Whether utilised or not.

I guess I prefer to interpret love, or partnership, as something explicitly positive.

Might be a bit naive, well, a lot naive, but I'd like to think that love elevates those who partake. It makes the days brighter. Makes the burdens easier. When one falls, their love(rs) should carry them, safe in the knowledge that when it's their turn they'll do the carrying. It's being loyal, sharing a life, helping one another through difficulties, inspiring confidence, celebrating achievements, nurturing self esteem and ambition. In short; we'd have each others backs.

Yeah, fair it's pretty Hallmark. But I'm a soft cunt....

"

This!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Love is giving someone the power to destroy you and trusting them not too

That seems to be a common theme here - love being placing absolute 'power' over your emotional well being to another - you used the word destroy, I'm not entirely comfortable with the definition of 'love' (something supposed to be so pure and good) being implicitly tied to something as negative as destruction. Whether utilised or not.

I guess I prefer to interpret love, or partnership, as something explicitly positive.

Might be a bit naive, well, a lot naive, but I'd like to think that love elevates those who partake. It makes the days brighter. Makes the burdens easier. When one falls, their love(rs) should carry them, safe in the knowledge that when it's their turn they'll do the carrying. It's being loyal, sharing a life, helping one another through difficulties, inspiring confidence, celebrating achievements, nurturing self esteem and ambition. In short; we'd have each others backs.

Yeah, fair it's pretty Hallmark. But I'm a soft cunt....

"

That is quite a beautiful way of looking at it...

Unforunetly people us love as an excuse to treat others or themselves poorly at times.

Maybe thats not "true love" though but to those people I am sure it is...

But as you asked for personal interpretation and not definition I'm gonna adopt with yours as it gives me a warm fuzzy feeling and Im stil in a good mood this morning so far

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By *elle xWoman  over a year ago

Doire Theas


"

Love is giving someone the power to destroy you and trusting them not too

That seems to be a common theme here - love being placing absolute 'power' over your emotional well being to another - you used the word destroy, I'm not entirely comfortable with the definition of 'love' (something supposed to be so pure and good) being implicitly tied to something as negative as destruction. Whether utilised or not.

I guess I prefer to interpret love, or partnership, as something explicitly positive.

Might be a bit naive, well, a lot naive, but I'd like to think that love elevates those who partake. It makes the days brighter. Makes the burdens easier. When one falls, their love(rs) should carry them, safe in the knowledge that when it's their turn they'll do the carrying. It's being loyal, sharing a life, helping one another through difficulties, inspiring confidence, celebrating achievements, nurturing self esteem and ambition. In short; we'd have each others backs.

Yeah, fair it's pretty Hallmark. But I'm a soft cunt....

"

You have actually got it

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By *oghunter33Woman  over a year ago

on the hill NordWest of

Unfortunately love and relationship have often/normally an ugly sibling called ownership. That's where things go wrong imo. Love is not about ownership and surrendering the whole you in every single aspect.

Love is about caring and sharing, sustaining and celebrating, tolerance, acceptance and respect. There has to be breathing space for love to stay healthy and grow.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple  over a year ago

East / North, Cork

I think modern love is about partnership. Its about living together respectfully and able to meet each others emotional and physical needs. Its about being there for each other, to make the other feel better after a difficult day, sharing good times. It's about understanding the other, and helping them be happy, challenging them when necessary, and building a future where they can thrive as people.

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By *ommando4Man  over a year ago

South Co. Dublin

A tennis score of zero as in 6/0, 6/0 ?

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By *ilthyNightsCouple  over a year ago

East / North, Cork


"Would anybody here be willing to share their own personal interpretation of what love actually is?

Honestly curious... "

What is love??

Baby dont hurt me

Dont hurt me

No more

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Would anybody here be willing to share their own personal interpretation of what love actually is?

Honestly curious... "

It's a movie

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Would anybody here be willing to share their own personal interpretation of what love actually is?

Honestly curious...

It's a movie"

Never seen it

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I think modern love is about partnership. Its about living together respectfully and able to meet each others emotional and physical needs. Its about being there for each other, to make the other feel better after a difficult day, sharing good times. It's about understanding the other, and helping them be happy, challenging them when necessary, and building a future where they can thrive as people."

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By *eddy and legsCouple  over a year ago

the wetlands


"Would anybody here be willing to share their own personal interpretation of what love actually is?

Honestly curious...

What is love??

Baby dont hurt me

Dont hurt me

No more"

Or in the words of Tina Turner "what's love got to do with it"

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By *nquisitive ladyWoman  over a year ago

meath


"Would anybody here be willing to share their own personal interpretation of what love actually is?

Honestly curious... "

Love is you both equally putting the others needs first. then reaching a happy compromise

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Love is for the most part a temporary state of mind. Often for women it ends when they realise their knight in shining armour is just another cockwomble in a tinfoil hat

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Love is giving someone the power to destroy you and trusting them not too

That seems to be a common theme here - love being placing absolute 'power' over your emotional well being to another - you used the word destroy, I'm not entirely comfortable with the definition of 'love' (something supposed to be so pure and good) being implicitly tied to something as negative as destruction. Whether utilised or not.

I guess I prefer to interpret love, or partnership, as something explicitly positive.

Might be a bit naive, well, a lot naive, but I'd like to think that love elevates those who partake. It makes the days brighter. Makes the burdens easier. When one falls, their love(rs) should carry them, safe in the knowledge that when it's their turn they'll do the carrying. It's being loyal, sharing a life, helping one another through difficulties, inspiring confidence, celebrating achievements, nurturing self esteem and ambition. In short; we'd have each others backs.

Yeah, fair it's pretty Hallmark. But I'm a soft cunt....

"

It's not exactly my definition of love but I would be "niave" to say it can't destroy your world....well at least temporarily, love can be dangerous especially when you rely on another person to be happy in life, love yourself first, only then are you capable of real love...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I think modern love is about partnership. Its about living together respectfully and able to meet each others emotional and physical needs. Its about being there for each other, to make the other feel better after a difficult day, sharing good times. It's about understanding the other, and helping them be happy, challenging them when necessary, and building a future where they can thrive as people."

I thought Modern love was a hit single from David Bowie

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Love is giving someone the power to destroy you and trusting them not too

That seems to be a common theme here - love being placing absolute 'power' over your emotional well being to another - you used the word destroy, I'm not entirely comfortable with the definition of 'love' (something supposed to be so pure and good) being implicitly tied to something as negative as destruction. Whether utilised or not.

I guess I prefer to interpret love, or partnership, as something explicitly positive.

Might be a bit naive, well, a lot naive, but I'd like to think that love elevates those who partake. It makes the days brighter. Makes the burdens easier. When one falls, their love(rs) should carry them, safe in the knowledge that when it's their turn they'll do the carrying. It's being loyal, sharing a life, helping one another through difficulties, inspiring confidence, celebrating achievements, nurturing self esteem and ambition. In short; we'd have each others backs.

Yeah, fair it's pretty Hallmark. But I'm a soft cunt....

It's not exactly my definition of love but I would be "niave" to say it can't destroy your world....well at least temporarily, love can be dangerous especially when you rely on another person to be happy in life, love yourself first, only then are you capable of real love..."

Very well put. plus if you don't love yourself and aren't assured of your own worth, why would anyone else love you?

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By *angtasticallyMan  over a year ago

Drogheda

You may not be in love every day but respect and morales are always there..

Love it is a funny thing

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Would anybody here be willing to share their own personal interpretation of what love actually is?

Honestly curious...

Love is you both equally putting the others needs first. then reaching a happy compromise

"

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By *ichael McCarthyMan  over a year ago

Lucan

Love is when two people come together as one, and remain that way, seriously pissing each other off until one of them eventually dies.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"

.... love yourself first, only then are you capable of real love..."

See, with all due respect, I have major issues with that notion.

I have an unbelievable amount of well nurtured self loathing, an anxiety disorder, a healthy dose of low grade clinical depression, and a history of substance abuse.

(I'm well medicated, don't panic.)

I also carry a large amount of guilt and shame from previous abuse I suffered...

I don't mean to go all pity party or anything but self love for me is nearly impossible. Often times I hate myself.

But I love my family. I love my friends. I love my dog. Unashamedly. Totally and completely.

To say that one needs to love oneself in order to love another effectively excludes those who have suffered emotional trauma or abuse from the possibility of feeling genuine love for another....

So as I've said, I respectly, humbly, but totally disagree with that notion!

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By *ogladyWoman  over a year ago

The bog


"

Love is giving someone the power to destroy you and trusting them not too

That seems to be a common theme here - love being placing absolute 'power' over your emotional well being to another - you used the word destroy, I'm not entirely comfortable with the definition of 'love' (something supposed to be so pure and good) being implicitly tied to something as negative as destruction. Whether utilised or not.

I guess I prefer to interpret love, or partnership, as something explicitly positive.

Might be a bit naive, well, a lot naive, but I'd like to think that love elevates those who partake. It makes the days brighter. Makes the burdens easier. When one falls, their love(rs) should carry them, safe in the knowledge that when it's their turn they'll do the carrying. It's being loyal, sharing a life, helping one another through difficulties, inspiring confidence, celebrating achievements, nurturing self esteem and ambition. In short; we'd have each others backs.

Yeah, fair it's pretty Hallmark. But I'm a soft cunt....

It's not exactly my definition of love but I would be "niave" to say it can't destroy your world....well at least temporarily, love can be dangerous especially when you rely on another person to be happy in life, love yourself first, only then are you capable of real love..."

Totally agree with this

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

.... love yourself first, only then are you capable of real love...

See, with all due respect, I have major issues with that notion.

I have an unbelievable amount of well nurtured self loathing, an anxiety disorder, a healthy dose of low grade clinical depression, and a history of substance abuse.

(I'm well medicated, don't panic.)

I also carry a large amount of guilt and shame from previous abuse I suffered...

I don't mean to go all pity party or anything but self love for me is nearly impossible. Often times I hate myself.

But I love my family. I love my friends. I love my dog. Unashamedly. Totally and completely.

To say that one needs to love oneself in order to love another effectively excludes those who have suffered emotional trauma or abuse from the possibility of feeling genuine love for another....

So as I've said, I respectly, humbly, but totally disagree with that notion!

"

I knew that therapist was full of shit..

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

.... love yourself first, only then are you capable of real love...

See, with all due respect, I have major issues with that notion.

I have an unbelievable amount of well nurtured self loathing, an anxiety disorder, a healthy dose of low grade clinical depression, and a history of substance abuse.

(I'm well medicated, don't panic.)

I also carry a large amount of guilt and shame from previous abuse I suffered...

I don't mean to go all pity party or anything but self love for me is nearly impossible. Often times I hate myself.

But I love my family. I love my friends. I love my dog. Unashamedly. Totally and completely.

To say that one needs to love oneself in order to love another effectively excludes those who have suffered emotional trauma or abuse from the possibility of feeling genuine love for another....

So as I've said, I respectly, humbly, but totally disagree with that notion!

"

I respectfully disagree with your disagreement here.

I think there is some confusion/miscommunication around the idea of self love generally.

Self love doesn't mean "I think I'm fucking deadly and I wouldn't change a single thing about myself". It's more about considered acceptance.

I had an eating disorder for years and it was during my recovery from that that my therapist first floated the idea of self love to me. I thought it was absurd, because how could I love myself when I was on antidepressants, having weekly panic attacks, out of work etc etc. But then he explained it to me in a way that made sense to me.

He said "would you love your child less for losing her job, or gaining weight? Would you say cruel things to and about her? Would you be less caring towards her, just because she was flawed or failing?"? That did it for me.

And I think self love is essential for real love with another person. Because I can't imagine how, without it, you'd ever allow yourself to be vulnerable enough to let someone really love you. I know I never could've.

You don't need to deny your past or ignore your weaknesses to love yourself. Just know that despite them, you are still worth loving.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

.... love yourself first, only then are you capable of real love...

See, with all due respect, I have major issues with that notion.

I have an unbelievable amount of well nurtured self loathing, an anxiety disorder, a healthy dose of low grade clinical depression, and a history of substance abuse.

(I'm well medicated, don't panic.)

I also carry a large amount of guilt and shame from previous abuse I suffered...

I don't mean to go all pity party or anything but self love for me is nearly impossible. Often times I hate myself.

But I love my family. I love my friends. I love my dog. Unashamedly. Totally and completely.

To say that one needs to love oneself in order to love another effectively excludes those who have suffered emotional trauma or abuse from the possibility of feeling genuine love for another....

So as I've said, I respectly, humbly, but totally disagree with that notion!

I respectfully disagree with your disagreement here.

I think there is some confusion/miscommunication around the idea of self love generally.

Self love doesn't mean "I think I'm fucking deadly and I wouldn't change a single thing about myself". It's more about considered acceptance.

I had an eating disorder for years and it was during my recovery from that that my therapist first floated the idea of self love to me. I thought it was absurd, because how could I love myself when I was on antidepressants, having weekly panic attacks, out of work etc etc. But then he explained it to me in a way that made sense to me.

He said "would you love your child less for losing her job, or gaining weight? Would you say cruel things to and about her? Would you be less caring towards her, just because she was flawed or failing?"? That did it for me.

And I think self love is essential for real love with another person. Because I can't imagine how, without it, you'd ever allow yourself to be vulnerable enough to let someone really love you. I know I never could've.

You don't need to deny your past or ignore your weaknesses to love yourself. Just know that despite them, you are still worth loving. "

Well said

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By *antra MassageMan  over a year ago

Old bog road


"A woman only falls in love with a man's lifestyle, this why a man who has a good business, a nice home and a big fat wallet will never have difficulties attracting women. You could be a total psychopath, or be terribly dull and boring, but once you have the trappings of success you're always gonna have a never ending stream of women queuing up... "

Darwin was right, but he didn't use this as an example. Men will fuck but women want to procreate, and make sure there will be a good nest for the brood. But that's not love.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"

You don't need to deny your past or ignore your weaknesses to love yourself. Just know that despite them, you are still worth loving. "

Point taken. But I do struggle with the notion that I am worthy of love, although were you to ask me I'd say EVERYONE is deserving of love.

It's just something I struggle with personally, especially the vulnerability part of it.

But hey, recovery is a slow process. One day at a time, progress not perfection, do the next thing etc. Etc.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"A woman only falls in love with a man's lifestyle, this why a man who has a good business, a nice home and a big fat wallet will never have difficulties attracting women. You could be a total psychopath, or be terribly dull and boring, but once you have the trappings of success you're always gonna have a never ending stream of women queuing up...

Darwin was right, but he didn't use this as an example. Men will fuck but women want to procreate, and make sure there will be a good nest for the brood. But that's not love. "

Bet you guys love Jordan Peterson...

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By *ustBoWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down


"A woman only falls in love with a man's lifestyle, this why a man who has a good business, a nice home and a big fat wallet will never have difficulties attracting women. You could be a total psychopath, or be terribly dull and boring, but once you have the trappings of success you're always gonna have a never ending stream of women queuing up...

Darwin was right, but he didn't use this as an example. Men will fuck but women want to procreate, and make sure there will be a good nest for the brood. But that's not love. "

Hahaha well I must be the odd one out then. I've never wanted to procreate and I've never been with any guy because of what life style he has. I am perfectly capable of looking after myself I don't need a guy to look after me they just need to be able to look after themselves. In fact I find guys whose messages consist of how much money they make or how they successful they are a big turn off.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

.... love yourself first, only then are you capable of real love...

See, with all due respect, I have major issues with that notion.

I have an unbelievable amount of well nurtured self loathing, an anxiety disorder, a healthy dose of low grade clinical depression, and a history of substance abuse.

(I'm well medicated, don't panic.)

I also carry a large amount of guilt and shame from previous abuse I suffered...

I don't mean to go all pity party or anything but self love for me is nearly impossible. Often times I hate myself.

But I love my family. I love my friends. I love my dog. Unashamedly. Totally and completely.

To say that one needs to love oneself in order to love another effectively excludes those who have suffered emotional trauma or abuse from the possibility of feeling genuine love for another....

So as I've said, I respectly, humbly, but totally disagree with that notion!

I respectfully disagree with your disagreement here.

I think there is some confusion/miscommunication around the idea of self love generally.

Self love doesn't mean "I think I'm fucking deadly and I wouldn't change a single thing about myself". It's more about considered acceptance.

I had an eating disorder for years and it was during my recovery from that that my therapist first floated the idea of self love to me. I thought it was absurd, because how could I love myself when I was on antidepressants, having weekly panic attacks, out of work etc etc. But then he explained it to me in a way that made sense to me.

He said "would you love your child less for losing her job, or gaining weight? Would you say cruel things to and about her? Would you be less caring towards her, just because she was flawed or failing?"? That did it for me.

And I think self love is essential for real love with another person. Because I can't imagine how, without it, you'd ever allow yourself to be vulnerable enough to let someone really love you. I know I never could've.

You don't need to deny your past or ignore your weaknesses to love yourself. Just know that despite them, you are still worth loving. "

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"In fact I find guys whose messages consist of how much money they make or how they successful they are a big turn off. "

Wait. What?

Guys actually message boasting about how much money they make??

L-O-FUCKING-L

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

You don't need to deny your past or ignore your weaknesses to love yourself. Just know that despite them, you are still worth loving.

Point taken. But I do struggle with the notion that I am worthy of love, although were you to ask me I'd say EVERYONE is deserving of love.

It's just something I struggle with personally, especially the vulnerability part of it.

But hey, recovery is a slow process. One day at a time, progress not perfection, do the next thing etc. Etc. "

Absofuckinglutely it is.

I found it easier to think of love as a verb rather than a feeling. Feeling love for myself seemed utterly impossible but treating myself lovingly (allowing myself to eat, sleeping well, going to therapy, not berating myself over every single little thing, being compassionate towards myself etc) was something that I found much easier to get my head around.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"In fact I find guys whose messages consist of how much money they make or how they successful they are a big turn off.

Wait. What?

Guys actually message boasting about how much money they make??

L-O-FUCKING-L

"

I recall a guy whose opening line was "I'm a surgeon...."

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

You don't need to deny your past or ignore your weaknesses to love yourself. Just know that despite them, you are still worth loving.

Point taken. But I do struggle with the notion that I am worthy of love, although were you to ask me I'd say EVERYONE is deserving of love.

It's just something I struggle with personally, especially the vulnerability part of it.

But hey, recovery is a slow process. One day at a time, progress not perfection, do the next thing etc. Etc.

Absofuckinglutely it is.

I found it easier to think of love as a verb rather than a feeling. Feeling love for myself seemed utterly impossible but treating myself lovingly (allowing myself to eat, sleeping well, going to therapy, not berating myself over every single little thing, being compassionate towards myself etc) was something that I found much easier to get my head around.

"

And that's exactly what makes love real - actions

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By *ustBoWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down


"

You don't need to deny your past or ignore your weaknesses to love yourself. Just know that despite them, you are still worth loving.

Point taken. But I do struggle with the notion that I am worthy of love, although were you to ask me I'd say EVERYONE is deserving of love.

It's just something I struggle with personally, especially the vulnerability part of it.

But hey, recovery is a slow process. One day at a time, progress not perfection, do the next thing etc. Etc. "

In answer to your question I don't know what love is. I thought I was in love at several points in my life but it never lasted.

I believe it's where you feel safe with someone and you know you can trust them with anything. You miss them greatly when they are not around and you both want to be together and spend time with each other and can be open about your feelings and thoughts without fear of judgement. I think proper love takes time to build. After the initial lust period ends then that is when the real relationship starts.Love is also not controlling the other person or putting them down you should love the person for who they are not what you want them to be.

Op take your time enjoy being single and being on here. Start to realise your own worth. Learn from past mistakes and never let anyone make you feel less than what you are. You and everyone else deserves better than that. You only have one life live it with people who treat you well. Don't waste time with anyone who puts you down x

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By *antra MassageMan  over a year ago

Old bog road

Apparently Buddhism decrees there is no such thing as romantic love. It's a distraction. I don't agree with this, as I think you feel love in your body, your heart, not with your mind, or your intellect. Your mind puts language around it, but it's something you feel. I like falling in love, I do it a lot. I've learned I don't need to possess the other person, maybe they dont even know I'm in love with them, but I can let them go, although it can be painful. But, tomorrow I'll fall in love all over again with someone else. Poets can express the agony and the ecstasy of love found and love lost so well,.. At the moment I'm reading/listening to a poem by Pushkin, "I have always loved you", Ya Vas Lubil, in Russian, as it expresses exactly how I feel for a woman.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"

You don't need to deny your past or ignore your weaknesses to love yourself. Just know that despite them, you are still worth loving.

Point taken. But I do struggle with the notion that I am worthy of love, although were you to ask me I'd say EVERYONE is deserving of love.

It's just something I struggle with personally, especially the vulnerability part of it.

But hey, recovery is a slow process. One day at a time, progress not perfection, do the next thing etc. Etc.

In answer to your question I don't know what love is. I thought I was in love at several points in my life but it never lasted.

I believe it's where you feel safe with someone and you know you can trust them with anything. You miss them greatly when they are not around and you both want to be together and spend time with each other and can be open about your feelings and thoughts without fear of judgement. I think proper love takes time to build. After the initial lust period ends then that is when the real relationship starts.Love is also not controlling the other person or putting them down you should love the person for who they are not what you want them to be.

Op take your time enjoy being single and being on here. Start to realise your own worth. Learn from past mistakes and never let anyone make you feel less than what you are. You and everyone else deserves better than that. You only have one life live it with people who treat you well. Don't waste time with anyone who puts you down x "

Oh I do, as best I can. I'm better at standing up for others than I am myself but I'm learning. Still a damned softie though! Gimme a sob story and I'm all over it!

But aye, I'm getting better (the meds help - actually a lady on here can take humble responsibility for getting me finally give in on that score!) but it's all a process...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I fell in love with a very special person last year. That person is me! I am all about self love now

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I fell in love with a very special person last year. That person is me! I am all about self love now "

Me too. 3 times daily

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By *ilthyNightsCouple  over a year ago

East / North, Cork


"I recall a guy whose opening LIE was "I'm a surgeon...." "

Fixed that for you

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By *ilthyNightsCouple  over a year ago

East / North, Cork

(Really enjoying this discussion BTW fab peeps, some real insights rather that the usual "why is noone wetting my cock" shite)

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By *oghunter33Woman  over a year ago

on the hill NordWest of


"Apparently Buddhism decrees there is no such thing as romantic love. It's a distraction. I don't agree with this, as I think you feel love in your body, your heart, not with your mind, or your intellect. Your mind puts language around it, but it's something you feel. I like falling in love, I do it a lot. I've learned I don't need to possess the other person, maybe they dont even know I'm in love with them, but I can let them go, although it can be painful. But, tomorrow I'll fall in love all over again with someone else. Poets can express the agony and the ecstasy of love found and love lost so well,.. At the moment I'm reading/listening to a poem by Pushkin, "I have always loved you", Ya Vas Lubil, in Russian, as it expresses exactly how I feel for a woman. "

Possesive love is where jealousy kicks in and the danger of suffocating the delicate flower that is a healthy love.

I've to admit that avatar is rather distracting...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

A widespread incurable disease which is known to affect mind and sometimes the body. Symptoms may include: Affected judgement, lightheadedness, eye-watering, chest pains, and increased need to be with the person who infected you. Is known as highly contagious and can be deadly.

— The MorganHammond

In a nutshell

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Apparently Buddhism decrees there is no such thing as romantic love. It's a distraction. I don't agree with this, as I think you feel love in your body, your heart, not with your mind, or your intellect. Your mind puts language around it, but it's something you feel. I like falling in love, I do it a lot. I've learned I don't need to possess the other person, maybe they dont even know I'm in love with them, but I can let them go, although it can be painful. But, tomorrow I'll fall in love all over again with someone else. Poets can express the agony and the ecstasy of love found and love lost so well,.. At the moment I'm reading/listening to a poem by Pushkin, "I have always loved you", Ya Vas Lubil, in Russian, as it expresses exactly how I feel for a woman. "

To me, this is infatuation or "falling in love" as opposed to "loving" - the former is focused on your own feelings and needs, the latter is (hopefully!) a two-way street

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"A woman only falls in love with a man's lifestyle, this why a man who has a good business, a nice home and a big fat wallet will never have difficulties attracting women. You could be a total psychopath, or be terribly dull and boring, but once you have the trappings of success you're always gonna have a never ending stream of women queuing up... "

I haven't got an all-encompassing answer to what love is but I'm pretty sure no-one should take advice from this guy, ever.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple  over a year ago

East / North, Cork


"A woman only falls in love with a man's lifestyle, this why a man who has a good business, a nice home and a big fat wallet will never have difficulties attracting women. You could be a total psychopath, or be terribly dull and boring, but once you have the trappings of success you're always gonna have a never ending stream of women queuing up...

I haven't got an all-encompassing answer to what love is but I'm pretty sure no-one should take advice from this guy, ever."

A common symptom of a broken heart has a really annoying noise that everyone around them has to listen to.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"A woman only falls in love with a man's lifestyle, this why a man who has a good business, a nice home and a big fat wallet will never have difficulties attracting women. You could be a total psychopath, or be terribly dull and boring, but once you have the trappings of success you're always gonna have a never ending stream of women queuing up...

I haven't got an all-encompassing answer to what love is but I'm pretty sure no-one should take advice from this guy, ever.

A common symptom of a broken heart has a really annoying noise that everyone around them has to listen to."

Going by that logic - Dirk is loaded with cash

Going by that logic - every single guy on here who doesn't get replies struggles to make ends meet hence there's no queue outside his door.

And every couple (obviously because no woman would ever be in a relationship with a peasant) - are bathing in prosecco while using caviar as a body scrub

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"A common symptom of a broken heart has a really annoying noise that everyone around them has to listen to."

Aw. That's sad. But probably very true.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Apparently Buddhism decrees there is no such thing as romantic love. It's a distraction. I don't agree with this, as I think you feel love in your body, your heart, not with your mind, or your intellect. Your mind puts language around it, but it's something you feel. I like falling in love, I do it a lot. I've learned I don't need to possess the other person, maybe they dont even know I'm in love with them, but I can let them go, although it can be painful. But, tomorrow I'll fall in love all over again with someone else. Poets can express the agony and the ecstasy of love found and love lost so well,.. At the moment I'm reading/listening to a poem by Pushkin, "I have always loved you", Ya Vas Lubil, in Russian, as it expresses exactly how I feel for a woman.

Possesive love is where jealousy kicks in and the danger of suffocating the delicate flower that is a healthy love.

I've to admit that avatar is rather distracting... "

THAT is THE EXACT reason why l will NEVER give myself to anyone completely ever again in the real World ..l will not be the reason why they might feel trapped or miss out on things in life and then somewhere down the tracks say something like .." only for you l'd have...... ".. you know the story ...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"THAT is THE EXACT reason why l will NEVER give myself to anyone completely ever again in the real World ..l will not be the reason why they might feel trapped or miss out on things in life and then somewhere down the tracks say something like .." only for you l'd have...... ".. you know the story ..."

But, surely if someone loves you they would never say that to you? That seems an extremely unloving thing to say to me.

And also - I feel like if you love someone you don't make them feel trapped or resentful. You support them in their ambitious to achieve their goals?

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By *ilthyNightsCouple  over a year ago

East / North, Cork


"A common symptom of a broken heart has a really annoying noise that everyone around them has to listen to.

Aw. That's sad. But probably very true. "

It is sad.. but plenty of people get fucked over and manage to not become mouthy misogynistic nightmares. It's a choice

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"A common symptom of a broken heart has a really annoying noise that everyone around them has to listen to.

Aw. That's sad. But probably very true.

It is sad.. but plenty of people get fucked over and manage to not become mouthy misogynistic nightmares. It's a choice "

Or man-haters!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"THAT is THE EXACT reason why l will NEVER give myself to anyone completely ever again in the real World ..l will not be the reason why they might feel trapped or miss out on things in life and then somewhere down the tracks say something like .." only for you l'd have...... ".. you know the story ...

But, surely if someone loves you they would never say that to you? That seems an extremely unloving thing to say to me.

And also - I feel like if you love someone you don't make them feel trapped or resentful. You support them in their ambitious to achieve their goals?"

You speak the truth

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Or man-haters! "

In fairness now Casey - how could we hate them when they provide so well for us? Be real girl.

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By *oghunter33Woman  over a year ago

on the hill NordWest of


"A woman only falls in love with a man's lifestyle, this why a man who has a good business, a nice home and a big fat wallet will never have difficulties attracting women. You could be a total psychopath, or be terribly dull and boring, but once you have the trappings of success you're always gonna have a never ending stream of women queuing up...

I haven't got an all-encompassing answer to what love is but I'm pretty sure no-one should take advice from this guy, ever."

It's just cheap sexist provocation, not worth wasting a thought.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Or man-haters!

In fairness now Casey - how could we hate them when they provide so well for us? Be real girl. "

Whaaaaat? You mean I've been working for the last 30+ years when all along I could have been painting my nails?????

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Whaaaaat? You mean I've been working for the last 30+ years when all along I could have been painting my nails????? "

Yesssss you silly girl. Don't be wasting your time with a career!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Ah lads, sure I've just been royally fucked in the arse myself... With no reach around and not even a dob of saliva to ease the pain...

But I'm still hopeful - in the inherent goodness of people, male, female, non-binary - and of the strength of our capacity to love one another.

Especially if that other is a kinky redhead.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Brb - just gotta go dye my hair red.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Whaaaaat? You mean I've been working for the last 30+ years when all along I could have been painting my nails?????

Yesssss you silly girl. Don't be wasting your time with a career! "

I'm reminded of the scene in Matilda where Mrs Wormwood lays into Miss Honey:

"Look, Miss Snit, a girl does not get anywhere by acting intelligent! I mean, take a look at you and me. You chose books - I chose looks. I have a nice house, a wonderful husband... and you are slaving away teaching snot-nosed children their ABCs."

And Miss Honey is just the most resourceful wonderful beautiful woman and Mrs Wormwood is just... not

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"

And Miss Honey is just the most resourceful wonderful beautiful woman and Mrs Wormwood is just... not "

Honestly? A threeway with Miss Honey and Mrs Wormwood is the dream.

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By *kcoupleCouple  over a year ago

.....


"A woman only falls in love with a man's lifestyle, this why a man who has a good business, a nice home and a big fat wallet will never have difficulties attracting women. You could be a total psychopath, or be terribly dull and boring, but once you have the trappings of success you're always gonna have a never ending stream of women queuing up...

I haven't got an all-encompassing answer to what love is but I'm pretty sure no-one should take advice from this guy, ever."

I hope so because if Mrs ever gets her hands on my credit union book or bank statements and sees that I didn't invest all my communion money in Apple I'll find myself busking on O'Connell street

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By *rmrs1234Couple  over a year ago

Waterford


"

Whaaaaat? You mean I've been working for the last 30+ years when all along I could have been painting my nails?????

Yesssss you silly girl. Don't be wasting your time with a career!

I'm reminded of the scene in Matilda where Mrs Wormwood lays into Miss Honey:

"Look, Miss Snit, a girl does not get anywhere by acting intelligent! I mean, take a look at you and me. You chose books - I chose looks. I have a nice house, a wonderful husband... and you are slaving away teaching snot-nosed children their ABCs."

And Miss Honey is just the most resourceful wonderful beautiful woman and Mrs Wormwood is just... not "

Just reminded me its world book day next week and ive still no costumes done. Shit.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Fortunately I'm totally immune to the lame man shaming tactics and language most women use to manipulate their husbands and boyfriends who are totally clueless to female nature.

Never judge a woman be what she says, as they use words like confetti. Only judge a woman by her actions.

According to the Irish medical council-Thirty percent of women are jacked up on anti-depressant drugs, so does this mean that the rest of yis are running around the countryside unmedicated

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Fortunately I'm totally immune to the lame man shaming tactics and language most women use to manipulate their husbands and boyfriends who are totally clueless to female nature.

Never judge a woman be what she says, as they use words like confetti. Only judge a woman by her actions.

According to the Irish medical council-Thirty percent of women are jacked up on anti-depressant drugs, so does this mean that the rest of yis are running around the countryside unmedicated "

Never before have a seen a man so willingly excuse himself from the possibility of a ride in such a dedicated fashion.

Well done sir.

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By *ittyMissKittyWoman  over a year ago

Dublin


"When you love someone so much and they are taken from you, you think about them the moment you wake up and the last moment you fall a sleep.. thats love or maybe grief

Yep!

Grief is love that you can not longer give "

So true

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Never before have a seen a man so willingly excuse himself from the possibility of a ride in such a dedicated fashion.

Well done sir. "

Ded.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Fortunately I'm totally immune to the lame man shaming tactics and language most women use to manipulate their husbands and boyfriends who are totally clueless to female nature.

Never judge a woman be what she says, as they use words like confetti. Only judge a woman by her actions.

According to the Irish medical council-Thirty percent of women are jacked up on anti-depressant drugs, so does this mean that the rest of yis are running around the countryside unmedicated "

Is it any surprise we need anti-depressants when there are people like you reducing us to gold diggers and predators? I'm sorry that you've clearly met some harpies in your time, but a bit of therapy might help you move past the bitterness.

Side note: I wish antidepressants jacked you up. I'd be zooming around able to take life by the balls, not just sitting here miserably existing and waiting for each day to be over.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Never before have a seen a man so willingly excuse himself from the possibility of a ride in such a dedicated fashion.

Well done sir. "

You always did have a way with words

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Never before have a seen a man so willingly excuse himself from the possibility of a ride in such a dedicated fashion.

Well done sir.

You always did have a way with words "

My tongue is almost as talented as mine fingers Isserly

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Never before have a seen a man so willingly excuse himself from the possibility of a ride in such a dedicated fashion.

Well done sir.

You always did have a way with words

My tongue is almost as talented as mine fingers Isserly "

Sure I wouldn't know, I'm from Donegal.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Never before have a seen a man so willingly excuse himself from the possibility of a ride in such a dedicated fashion.

Well done sir.

I'm actually inundated with pussy, women seem to be attracted to my caviler attitude for some inexplicable reason. Of course most guys just sycophants who crave female approval, where as I just couldn't give a rat's ass

Ded. "

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"

I'm actually inundated with pussy, women seem to be attracted to my caviler attitude for some inexplicable reason. Of course most guys just sycophants who crave female approval, where as I just couldn't give a rat's ass

Ded. "

OK Boomer.

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By *rmrs1234Couple  over a year ago

Waterford

In dreams id say

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

I'm actually inundated with pussy, women seem to be attracted to my caviler attitude for some inexplicable reason. Of course most guys just sycophants who crave female approval, where as I just couldn't give a rat's ass

Ded.

OK Boomer. "

I'm surprised he hasn't used the word 'cuck' yet, but I feel it's incoming

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By *rmrs1234Couple  over a year ago

Waterford


"

I'm actually inundated with pussy, women seem to be attracted to my caviler attitude for some inexplicable reason. Of course most guys just sycophants who crave female approval, where as I just couldn't give a rat's ass

Ded.

OK Boomer.

I'm surprised he hasn't used the word 'cuck' yet, but I feel it's incoming"

Hes already used beta so id say cuck or simp is on the way ??

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

I'm actually inundated with pussy, women seem to be attracted to my caviler attitude for some inexplicable reason. Of course most guys just sycophants who crave female approval, where as I just couldn't give a rat's ass

Ded.

OK Boomer.

I'm surprised he hasn't used the word 'cuck' yet, but I feel it's incoming

Hes already used beta so id say cuck or simp is on the way ??"

My eyes must have just naturally glazed over when I saw it

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

You gotta respect anybody who uses the phrase "inundated with pussy" without a hint of irony!

That takes some serious chutzpah!

Wait... Are you... Zap Brannigan?!

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By *rmrs1234Couple  over a year ago

Waterford


"You gotta respect anybody who uses the phrase "inundated with pussy" without a hint of irony!

That takes some serious chutzpah!

Wait... Are you... Zap Brannigan?! "

Troy mclure even

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I can just visualise all of you misguided white knight's donning yer cognitive dissonance helmets, ready to defend the honor of the nearest damsel in distress. "Stand back ma lady, I will deal with the scoundrel"

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I can just visualise all of you misguided white knight's donning yer cognitive dissonance helmets, ready to defend the honor of the nearest damsel in distress. "Stand back ma lady, I will deal with the scoundrel" "

Oh come now Juan. I think the Damsels are perfectly capable of dealing with your limp dicked persona alllllll by themselves.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple  over a year ago

East / North, Cork


"I can just visualise all of you misguided white knight's donning yer cognitive dissonance helmets, ready to defend the honor of the nearest damsel in distress. "Stand back ma lady, I will deal with the scoundrel" "

I'm sorry she hurt you so badly.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 26/02/20 13:54:03]

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"

I'm sorry she hurt you so badly. "

This is the adult, empathic response.

I salute you.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I can just visualise all of you misguided white knight's donning yer cognitive dissonance helmets, ready to defend the honor of the nearest damsel in distress. "Stand back ma lady, I will deal with the scoundrel" "

Any incel worth his salt knows it's m'lady, come on now

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I can just visualise all of you misguided white knight's donning yer cognitive dissonance helmets, ready to defend the honor of the nearest damsel in distress. "Stand back ma lady, I will deal with the scoundrel" "

Kinda hot though...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I can just visualise all of you misguided white knight's donning yer cognitive dissonance helmets, ready to defend the honor of the nearest damsel in distress. "Stand back ma lady, I will deal with the scoundrel"

I'm sorry she hurt you so badly. "

Yep

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By *rmrs1234Couple  over a year ago

Waterford


"I can just visualise all of you misguided white knight's donning yer cognitive dissonance helmets, ready to defend the honor of the nearest damsel in distress. "Stand back ma lady, I will deal with the scoundrel"

Kinda hot though..."

agree

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I can just visualise all of you misguided white knight's donning yer cognitive dissonance helmets, ready to defend the honor of the nearest damsel in distress. "Stand back ma lady, I will deal with the scoundrel"

Kinda hot though..."

Polishing my lance as we speak......

Im with Don Juan tho bitches be trippin

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I can just visualise all of you misguided white knight's donning yer cognitive dissonance helmets, ready to defend the honor of the nearest damsel in distress. "Stand back ma lady, I will deal with the scoundrel"

Any incel worth his salt knows it's m'lady, come on now"

Thank you! I was going to mention incels but wasn't sure if people knew what they were ...

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"

Polishing my lance as we speak......

Im with Don Juan tho bitches be trippin"

They also be cray.

Must be all on their periodicals or summat.

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By *rmrs1234Couple  over a year ago

Waterford


"

Polishing my lance as we speak......

Im with Don Juan tho bitches be trippin

They also be cray.

Must be all on their periodicals or summat. "

nah were just being our delusional, predatory selves. Like black widows waiting to pounce

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By *ilthyNightsCouple  over a year ago

East / North, Cork


"I can just visualise all of you misguided white knight's donning yer cognitive dissonance helmets, ready to defend the honor of the nearest damsel in distress. "Stand back ma lady, I will deal with the scoundrel"

Any incel worth his salt knows it's m'lady, come on now

Thank you! I was going to mention incels but wasn't sure if people knew what they were ..."

Therr seems to be a crossover between MGTOW and the incel movement.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Polishing my lance as we speak......

Im with Don Juan tho bitches be trippin

They also be cray.

Must be all on their periodicals or summat.

nah were just being our delusional, predatory selves. Like black widows waiting to pounce "

Obvs cray cray

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By *rmrs1234Couple  over a year ago

Waterford


"

Polishing my lance as we speak......

Im with Don Juan tho bitches be trippin

They also be cray.

Must be all on their periodicals or summat.

nah were just being our delusional, predatory selves. Like black widows waiting to pounce

Obvs cray cray "

the good cray cray though. u get to keep your head and your money

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By *ustBoWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down


"I can just visualise all of you misguided white knight's donning yer cognitive dissonance helmets, ready to defend the honor of the nearest damsel in distress. "Stand back ma lady, I will deal with the scoundrel"

Kinda hot though...

Polishing my lance as we speak......

Im with Don Juan tho bitches be trippin"

Don't be tripping over your lance now you never know when we'd be ready to pounce

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"

Therr seems to be a crossover between MGTOW and the incel movement."

I had to Google.

Man oh man.

Imagine living in a patriarchal society and still being insecure enough in your own masculinity that you think the only option open to you is to leave!

Holy Fucking Shit Balls!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"

the good cray cray though. u get to keep your head and your money "

But.... I want you to take my head... And the other inch too if you're so inclined!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

nah were just being our delusional, predatory selves. Like black widows waiting to pounce "

I would like to excuse myself from this please. I am not a pouncer. I am a napper.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple  over a year ago

East / North, Cork

Yeah the MGTOW things was new to me too when Juan first mentioned it.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

You don't need to deny your past or ignore your weaknesses to love yourself. Just know that despite them, you are still worth loving.

Point taken. But I do struggle with the notion that I am worthy of love, although were you to ask me I'd say EVERYONE is deserving of love.

It's just something I struggle with personally, especially the vulnerability part of it.

But hey, recovery is a slow process. One day at a time, progress not perfection, do the next thing etc. Etc.

In answer to your question I don't know what love is. I thought I was in love at several points in my life but it never lasted.

I believe it's where you feel safe with someone and you know you can trust them with anything. You miss them greatly when they are not around and you both want to be together and spend time with each other and can be open about your feelings and thoughts without fear of judgement. I think proper love takes time to build. After the initial lust period ends then that is when the real relationship starts.Love is also not controlling the other person or putting them down you should love the person for who they are not what you want them to be.

Op take your time enjoy being single and being on here. Start to realise your own worth. Learn from past mistakes and never let anyone make you feel less than what you are. You and everyone else deserves better than that. You only have one life live it with people who treat you well. Don't waste time with anyone who puts you down x

Oh I do, as best I can. I'm better at standing up for others than I am myself but I'm learning. Still a damned softie though! Gimme a sob story and I'm all over it!

But aye, I'm getting better (the meds help - actually a lady on here can take humble responsibility for getting me finally give in on that score!) but it's all a process... "

She knows your worth

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By *ustin-SiderMan  over a year ago

Belfast

[Removed by poster at 27/02/20 04:08:28]

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By *ustin-SiderMan  over a year ago

Belfast


"Fortunately I'm totally immune to the lame man shaming tactics and language most women use to manipulate their husbands and boyfriends who are totally clueless to female nature.

Never judge a woman be what she says, as they use words like confetti. Only judge a woman by her actions.

According to the Irish medical council-Thirty percent of women are jacked up on anti-depressant drugs, so does this mean that the rest of yis are running around the countryside unmedicated "

Possibly means that 30% to f women have encountered or continue to suffer guys like yourself, possibly, maybe.

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By *ustin-SiderMan  over a year ago

Belfast

For me, love is when you wish to see the other person happy and well, whether it's in a relationship with the person or separately or even if the person is with someone else.

If you truly love the person you would want them to be happy and in good health.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"For me, love is when you wish to see the other person happy and well, whether it's in a relationship with the person or separately or even if the person is with someone else.

If you truly love the person you would want them to be happy and in good health."

This. Absolutely this....

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"

She knows your worth "

Yeah but she's also the stubborn type and has been known to make mistakes so who can trust her opinion!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"For me, love is when you wish to see the other person happy and well, whether it's in a relationship with the person or separately or even if the person is with someone else.

If you truly love the person you would want them to be happy and in good health."

I feel this way about lots of people, I certainly don't love them all.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"For me, love is when you wish to see the other person happy and well, whether it's in a relationship with the person or separately or even if the person is with someone else.

If you truly love the person you would want them to be happy and in good health.

I feel this way about lots of people, I certainly don't love them all. "

I don't think that's the ABSOLUTE definitive definition.... Just that it can certainly play a part.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Would anybody here be willing to share their own personal interpretation of what love actually is?

Honestly curious... "

Does your question relate solely to love between people in a relationship or do you include the love we have for others aside from our partners? I mean like friends and family?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Would anybody here be willing to share their own personal interpretation of what love actually is?

Honestly curious...

Does your question relate solely to love between people in a relationship or do you include the love we have for others aside from our partners? I mean like friends and family?"

I was aiming for romantic love. Eros.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Would anybody here be willing to share their own personal interpretation of what love actually is?

Honestly curious...

Does your question relate solely to love between people in a relationship or do you include the love we have for others aside from our partners? I mean like friends and family?

I was aiming for romantic love. Eros. "

So not coffee then?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Whatever you want it to be.. simple

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By *ilthyNightsCouple  over a year ago

East / North, Cork


"Whatever you want it to be.. simple "

I want it to be a pink and blue stripey rhino

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Whatever you want it to be.. simple

I want it to be a pink and blue stripey rhino"

Typical.......

You can pick anything your mind can imagine and you still go for something with a big ol horn

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"For me, love is when you wish to see the other person happy and well, whether it's in a relationship with the person or separately or even if the person is with someone else.

If you truly love the person you would want them to be happy and in good health.

I feel this way about lots of people, I certainly don't love them all.

I don't think that's the ABSOLUTE definitive definition.... Just that it can certainly play a part. "

Well if it doesn't you certainly don't love them, it's more an exclusion clause perhaps

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Would anybody here be willing to share their own personal interpretation of what love actually is?

Honestly curious...

Does your question relate solely to love between people in a relationship or do you include the love we have for others aside from our partners? I mean like friends and family?

I was aiming for romantic love. Eros.

So not coffee then?"

Dude I'll have coffee with ya

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Would anybody here be willing to share their own personal interpretation of what love actually is?

Honestly curious...

Does your question relate solely to love between people in a relationship or do you include the love we have for others aside from our partners? I mean like friends and family?

I was aiming for romantic love. Eros.

So not coffee then?

Dude I'll have coffee with ya "

Love ya

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"

Love ya "

Love you too Fam

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

And that's the questions answered I'd say.

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By *r tayt2Man  over a year ago

Trim

Definition of love

When a girl grabs the two cheeks of your arse and says your in love

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Definition of love

When a girl grabs the two cheeks of your arse and says your in love"

"Who do you think you are? James Bond? None of your fancy stuff there Ted, just lob it into me."

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Definition of love

When a girl grabs the two cheeks of your arse and says your in love"

Reminds me of Lee's first declaration

"I love you, and don't laugh cynically just because my cock is in your mouth right now "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Definition of love

When a girl grabs the two cheeks of your arse and says your in love

Reminds me of Lee's first declaration

"I love you, and don't laugh cynically just because my cock is in your mouth right now " "

Lee

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"

Lee"

Awwwwww you two

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By *wing a ding dingWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere over the rainbow

"Every atom of your flesh is as dear to me as my own;

In pain and sickness it would still be dear"

Charlotte Brontë, Jane Eyre

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Caring enough for someone enough to think about their wellbeing before your own, feeling happy and calm from just looking at them, trusting that someone with every darkest secret of your soul. "

When both genuinely in-love then its a special kinda magic....

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


""Every atom of your flesh is as dear to me as my own;

In pain and sickness it would still be dear"

Charlotte Brontë, Jane Eyre"

Jane Eyre - The original Red Room

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By *wing a ding dingWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere over the rainbow

Never did I ever look into a mans pockets and find love there. If there was no money due to difficult times, I looked into his eyes and told him if he supported me to support the family, we would be good. All I ever asked for was honesty and respect. My friends who are the opposite of me are happily married with gorgeous shoes and hand bags and men who idolise them .... strange that ..

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By *wing a ding dingWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere over the rainbow


""Every atom of your flesh is as dear to me as my own;

In pain and sickness it would still be dear"

Charlotte Brontë, Jane Eyre

Jane Eyre - The original Red Room

"

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