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Understanding Kink and BDSM

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

As an experienced London based Dom, I still see, read and experience a lot of misunderstanding of Kink and BDSM.

Crucially for those unaware bdsm is based on respect, trust , shared values and consent. A lot of people who aren’t familiar or disinterested perhaps have a version that they might assume as fact.

I want to express that for many people like me: Kink and the BDSM lifestyle has allowed me to be honest about the things I like, appreciate other peoples thoughts and desires and explore beyond my personal thoughts.

There is a lot of pleasure , growth and enrichment.

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By *eatrice BadinageWoman  over a year ago

In a Sparkly Dress

There is not enough teaching unfortunately.

For instance my bdsm is completely different to your bdsm and although yours may intrigue me slightly, no I wouldn't bother to learn about it.

Oh and good to see you back OP

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"There is not enough teaching unfortunately.

For instance my bdsm is completely different to your bdsm and although yours may intrigue me slightly, no I wouldn't bother to learn about it.

Oh and good to see you back OP "

What you know you know, what you don’t know you don’t miss.

Thank you for the welcome.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"There is not enough teaching unfortunately.

For instance my bdsm is completely different to your bdsm and although yours may intrigue me slightly, no I wouldn't bother to learn about it.

Oh and good to see you back OP "

Absolutely. I’m hesitant to call myself “kinky” as people are too quick to put their own definitions on other people. I have kinks but not really BDSM type ones, and nor do i conform to the stereotype of a “domme” no matter how many men message me asking me to be the domme they want

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"There is not enough teaching unfortunately.

For instance my bdsm is completely different to your bdsm and although yours may intrigue me slightly, no I wouldn't bother to learn about it.

Oh and good to see you back OP

Absolutely. I’m hesitant to call myself “kinky” as people are too quick to put their own definitions on other people. I have kinks but not really BDSM type ones, and nor do i conform to the stereotype of a “domme” no matter how many men message me asking me to be the domme they want "

I do agree that labels seem to want to compartmentalise ourselves.

We are sophisticated creatures with fine nuances. I do use Dom as a self description as it’s a starting point for conversation.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"There is not enough teaching unfortunately.

For instance my bdsm is completely different to your bdsm and although yours may intrigue me slightly, no I wouldn't bother to learn about it.

Oh and good to see you back OP

Absolutely. I’m hesitant to call myself “kinky” as people are too quick to put their own definitions on other people. I have kinks but not really BDSM type ones, and nor do i conform to the stereotype of a “domme” no matter how many men message me asking me to be the domme they want

I do agree that labels seem to want to compartmentalise ourselves.

We are sophisticated creatures with fine nuances. I do use Dom as a self description as it’s a starting point for conversation.

"

I use Daddy as it definitely fits me better, and it invites more questions. Usually. But I do still get men messaging me saying “Oh goddess please stomp on my balls I’ll do anything” as an opener and it’s extremely offputting

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"There is not enough teaching unfortunately.

For instance my bdsm is completely different to your bdsm and although yours may intrigue me slightly, no I wouldn't bother to learn about it.

Oh and good to see you back OP

Absolutely. I’m hesitant to call myself “kinky” as people are too quick to put their own definitions on other people. I have kinks but not really BDSM type ones, and nor do i conform to the stereotype of a “domme” no matter how many men message me asking me to be the domme they want

I do agree that labels seem to want to compartmentalise ourselves.

We are sophisticated creatures with fine nuances. I do use Dom as a self description as it’s a starting point for conversation.

I use Daddy as it definitely fits me better, and it invites more questions. Usually. But I do still get men messaging me saying “Oh goddess please stomp on my balls I’ll do anything” as an opener and it’s extremely offputting "

I can certainly see why the daddy label would raise questions, because it’s uncommon. For me, If I’m asked questions I’d welcome the opportunity to reply. So long as it’s respectfully asked.

I concur if people messaging and ignoring your profile (typical male behaviour sadly) and simply prioritise their wishes upon you, then thats plain rude.

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