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The Sandwich Matchmaking Thread
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Oi oi; Cupid here once again 
You want to join in so as to engage in licentious and carnal relations with another forum user? Well strike a light and eeeee by gum! - you’ve come to the right place.
The rules: Simply list the ingredients you’d put in a sandwich in order to woo a potential sexual partner.
Remember, just as many species in the animal kingdom have worked out, you need to impress them.
Now simply sit back and gawk at everyone else answers.
See a sandwich that you’d like?
Great! Type: ‘Show me the sandwich!’ in reply to them here.
Voila! A surefire sexual relationship is created!
This surely can not fail, right? Science for the win!
Off you go my fine folks  |
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By *KloganMan
over a year ago
Ramsbottom |
Love it OP…
Close to sell by date bloomer from the coop.. ham, mayonnaise, some grated cheese and whatever flavour crisps float your boat.. (I prefer space raiders for this type of tasty treat.) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’m going to attract a veggie- - halloumi cheese, roast veggies and sriracha sauce.
Anyone?"
Can I put you in reserve?
Just in case a chip butty comes along! |
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In this weather I will go for a greek salad sandwich with plenty of feta and and a drizzling of tzatziki sauce which I actually made last week tp finish of some stuff I had in the fridge. It was yummy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Have to be a club sandwich for me three toasted slices of bread spread with mayo, fresh warm chicken and lettuce and crispy bacon and tomato on the other layer |
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I do like a well fired buttered roll with bacon crisps however if I'm making a sandwich for work my go to is low gi cob from Lidl, tuna (washed) mayo, chillies, lettuce, tomatoes, red onion and sweet pickle  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My local bakery makes an amazing chicken club baguette multiseed.. some rocket thrown in and just the perfect ratio of bacon to chicken Mayo, no sogginess and thin slices of edam. So good.
T |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My local bakery makes an amazing chicken club baguette multiseed.. some rocket thrown in and just the perfect ratio of bacon to chicken Mayo, no sogginess and thin slices of edam. So good.
T"
Rocket? 
Get the to a nunnery |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My local bakery makes an amazing chicken club baguette multiseed.. some rocket thrown in and just the perfect ratio of bacon to chicken Mayo, no sogginess and thin slices of edam. So good.
T
Rocket?
Get the to a nunnery"
Hehe but I love the contrast of textures and flavours. I can pick all of yours if needed ? I'm good like that. |
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"Just crisps.. I like em dry and smooth like butter.
**Show me the sandwich**
Do we shag after the sandwich or before? I don't get the game."
I wholeheartedly recommend both. And indeed, whilst actually eating the sandwich for a extra touch of kinkiness in fact  |
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"Croque monsieur made with thick cut ham, home bad béchamel sauce and using tiger bread. 
We are basically sandwich twins and yet our profiles suggest incompatibility. OP! Refund please 
J"
Haha! They are just the best though right? |
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"Croque monsieur made with thick cut ham, home bad béchamel sauce and using tiger bread.
We are basically sandwich twins and yet our profiles suggest incompatibility. OP! Refund please
J
Haha! They are just the best though right? "
They are!  Let's just have a sandwich social instead.
Also hi Tinder! 
Jx |
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"Croque monsieur made with thick cut ham, home bad béchamel sauce and using tiger bread.
We are basically sandwich twins and yet our profiles suggest incompatibility. OP! Refund please
J"
Ahhhh  I must have fired my arrow inaccurately on this occasion…. 
Can I blame the feathers or possibly inclement weather conditions affecting my normally expert marksmanship? Yes….yes that was it |
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"Lightly toasted, cheap, white, medium sliced bread. Nutella. Banana slices. A smudge of Biscoff spread
Damn! Show me the sandwich 
J"
Am I supposed to have an actual picture of the sandwich on hand or do I just whap the flaps out? |
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"Lightly toasted, cheap, white, medium sliced bread. Nutella. Banana slices. A smudge of Biscoff spread
Damn! Show me the sandwich
J
Am I supposed to have an actual picture of the sandwich on hand or do I just whap the flaps out?"
I advise to initially open the sandwich for your suitors keen inspection before parting the latter…
It’s fine etiquette. Wot wot? |
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"Lightly toasted, cheap, white, medium sliced bread. Nutella. Banana slices. A smudge of Biscoff spread
Damn! Show me the sandwich
J
Am I supposed to have an actual picture of the sandwich on hand or do I just whap the flaps out?
I advise to initially open the sandwich for your suitors keen inspection before parting the latter…
It’s fine etiquette. Wot wot? "
Ummm, I don't know. I just really want to try that sandwich (not a euphemism)
J |
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"Lightly toasted, cheap, white, medium sliced bread. Nutella. Banana slices. A smudge of Biscoff spread
Damn! Show me the sandwich
J
Am I supposed to have an actual picture of the sandwich on hand or do I just whap the flaps out?
I advise to initially open the sandwich for your suitors keen inspection before parting the latter…
It’s fine etiquette. Wot wot?
Ummm, I don't know. I just really want to try that sandwich (not a euphemism)
J"
Remind me to pack some for the next social |
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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago
Transsexual Transylvania |
A halved and lightly toasted bagel, each half covered in butter, horseradish sauce, cream cheese, roughly torn iceberg lettuce, smoked salmon and capers. Drizzle lemon juice over it, sprinkle some black pepper, and serve.
 |
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A Shooter's sandwich. Hollow out a sourdough loaf and slice lengthways. Reserve the breadcrumbs. Finely chop a clove of garlic and 500g of good, meaty mushrooms. Cook both in a little butter, season, add chopped French parsley, the breadcrumbs, and finely chopped toasted hazelnuts. Set aside to cool, then pack into one half of the loaf.
Then season and cook two steaks of your choice - a total weight of around 500g. Rest for 10 minutes, mix the juices in with the mushroom mixture, and place the steaks in the other half of the loaf.
Wrap in greaseproof paper, tie with string, then weigh down with a heavy book or similar. Refrigerate overnight. In the morning, slice, and serve with redcurrant jelly or piccalilli.
Once eaten, never forgotten. I've only made it once, and it IS a bit of a faff, but...oh Lord. |
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By *KloganMan
over a year ago
Ramsbottom |
"Not really a sandwich guy and not sure if this counts but toasted white bread, chicken Tikka slices, grated cheese and mayo. It's amazing! "
Oh it counts Joe, it definitely counts.. going to get some tikka slices on my way home tomorrow. |
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"A Shooter's sandwich. Hollow out a sourdough loaf and slice lengthways. Reserve the breadcrumbs. Finely chop a clove of garlic and 500g of good, meaty mushrooms. Cook both in a little butter, season, add chopped French parsley, the breadcrumbs, and finely chopped toasted hazelnuts. Set aside to cool, then pack into one half of the loaf.
Then season and cook two steaks of your choice - a total weight of around 500g. Rest for 10 minutes, mix the juices in with the mushroom mixture, and place the steaks in the other half of the loaf.
Wrap in greaseproof paper, tie with string, then weigh down with a heavy book or similar. Refrigerate overnight. In the morning, slice, and serve with redcurrant jelly or piccalilli.
Once eaten, never forgotten. I've only made it once, and it IS a bit of a faff, but...oh Lord. "
For the sheer effort in the preparation of this mighty fine sounding meal I’m going to shout: ‘SHOW ME THE SANDWICH!’ |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not really a sandwich guy and not sure if this counts but toasted white bread, chicken Tikka slices, grated cheese and mayo. It's amazing!
Oh it counts Joe, it definitely counts.. going to get some tikka slices on my way home tomorrow."
I haven't had it in ages so I might join you! |
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"A Shooter's sandwich. Hollow out a sourdough loaf and slice lengthways. Reserve the breadcrumbs. Finely chop a clove of garlic and 500g of good, meaty mushrooms. Cook both in a little butter, season, add chopped French parsley, the breadcrumbs, and finely chopped toasted hazelnuts. Set aside to cool, then pack into one half of the loaf.
Then season and cook two steaks of your choice - a total weight of around 500g. Rest for 10 minutes, mix the juices in with the mushroom mixture, and place the steaks in the other half of the loaf.
Wrap in greaseproof paper, tie with string, then weigh down with a heavy book or similar. Refrigerate overnight. In the morning, slice, and serve with redcurrant jelly or piccalilli.
Once eaten, never forgotten. I've only made it once, and it IS a bit of a faff, but...oh Lord. "
Man that's like sandwich porn
Tinder x |
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"New York style Pastrami on rye with Emmental, good French mustard, sauerkraut and proper gherkins
I was in agreeance until the Gherkin part
Don't Diss the gherkins!
Tinder "
Sorry Tinder but Gherkins are the work of the Devil |
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"New York style Pastrami on rye with Emmental, good French mustard, sauerkraut and proper gherkins
I was in agreeance until the Gherkin part
Ok ok. I’ll eat your gherkins
Just the Gherkins ? "
Sorry typo. Should’ve been gherkin |
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"New York style Pastrami on rye with Emmental, good French mustard, sauerkraut and proper gherkins
I was in agreeance until the Gherkin part
Ok ok. I’ll eat your gherkins
Just the Gherkins ?
Sorry typo. Should’ve been gherkin "
How long is the average Gherkin?? |
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"New York style Pastrami on rye with Emmental, good French mustard, sauerkraut and proper gherkins
I was in agreeance until the Gherkin part
Ok ok. I’ll eat your gherkins
Just the Gherkins ?
Sorry typo. Should’ve been gherkin
How long is the average Gherkin?? "
It's not the workin' of the gherkin, but the merkin in the jerkin. |
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"New York style Pastrami on rye with Emmental, good French mustard, sauerkraut and proper gherkins
I was in agreeance until the Gherkin part
Ok ok. I’ll eat your gherkins
Just the Gherkins ?
Sorry typo. Should’ve been gherkin
How long is the average Gherkin?? "
About the same length as a Sky remote… according to fab |
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"New York style Pastrami on rye with Emmental, good French mustard, sauerkraut and proper gherkins
I was in agreeance until the Gherkin part
Ok ok. I’ll eat your gherkins
Just the Gherkins ?
Sorry typo. Should’ve been gherkin
How long is the average Gherkin??
It's not the workin' of the gherkin, but the merkin in the jerkin."
It’s really about how they taste |
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"New York style Pastrami on rye with Emmental, good French mustard, sauerkraut and proper gherkins
I was in agreeance until the Gherkin part
Ok ok. I’ll eat your gherkins
Just the Gherkins ?
Sorry typo. Should’ve been gherkin
How long is the average Gherkin??
It's not the workin' of the gherkin, but the merkin in the jerkin.
It’s really about how they taste "
Like Pineapple Juice Obvs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can't choose just one filling, so they can choose:
A) Thick sliced Tiger Bread with Lurpack Butter, grilled thin steak cut into strips with caramelised onions.
B) Thick Sliced Tiger Bread with spicy mayo, home made chicken tikka and onion bhaji slices.
C) Thick sliced crusty white bread with chicken dippers and loads of thick gravy.
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"I can't choose just one filling, so they can choose:
A) Thick sliced Tiger Bread with Lurpack Butter, grilled thin steak cut into strips with caramelised onions.
B) Thick Sliced Tiger Bread with spicy mayo, home made chicken tikka and onion bhaji slices.
C) Thick sliced crusty white bread with chicken dippers and loads of thick gravy.
"
KFC gravy? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can't choose just one filling, so they can choose:
A) Thick sliced Tiger Bread with Lurpack Butter, grilled thin steak cut into strips with caramelised onions.
B) Thick Sliced Tiger Bread with spicy mayo, home made chicken tikka and onion bhaji slices.
C) Thick sliced crusty white bread with chicken dippers and loads of thick gravy.
KFC gravy? "
No way, that stuff looks like muddy water  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Fresh sourdough bread with crust with salted butter, couple of slices of Wiltshire ham, German salami, slice of tomato, gherkin, roasted peppers in oil, boiled egg slices and all that covered by a blanket of grated Edam cheese. Have I just made myself hungry or horny? Can't decide |
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"Fresh sourdough bread with crust with salted butter, couple of slices of Wiltshire ham, German salami, slice of tomato, gherkin, roasted peppers in oil, boiled egg slices and all that covered by a blanket of grated Edam cheese. Have I just made myself hungry or horny? Can't decide "
Horngry I would say |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Fresh sourdough bread with crust with salted butter, couple of slices of Wiltshire ham, German salami, slice of tomato, gherkin, roasted peppers in oil, boiled egg slices and all that covered by a blanket of grated Edam cheese. Have I just made myself hungry or horny? Can't decide
Uff, I like a bit of food porn
Horngry I would say "
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By *rincipessaWoman
over a year ago
your wildest dreams, |
"Crispy sourdough baguette, fresh mint, fried mushrooms, sun dried tomatoes, olives, capers, lemon juice and more mint
Oh my.
Show me the sandwich! That sounds like sunshine on a plate."
It is. Come join me in paradise |
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"Crispy sourdough baguette, fresh mint, fried mushrooms, sun dried tomatoes, olives, capers, lemon juice and more mint
Oh my.
Show me the sandwich! That sounds like sunshine on a plate.
It is. Come join me in paradise "
Just call me Adam. |
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