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Bad Euphemisms for Sex.

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By *ags73 OP Man 27 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

Rather controversially the term ‘the actual sex’ and ‘The Sex’ were used on another thread.

As was ‘Rumpy Pumpy’

So, top of my head, the following are also terrible

The Dirty Deed

Two Headed Monster

‘Fun’

So what other euphemisms are rubbish for saying you had Sex?

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By (user no longer on site) 27 weeks ago

Rumpy pumpy. 😂

I've not heard that in years. That's me giggling for ages instead of sleeping lol.

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By *ensuallover1000Man 27 weeks ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

Bumping uglies, knocking boots and doing the beast with two backs - all rather unpleasant euphemisms 😵‍💫

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By *echnosonic_BrummieMan 27 weeks ago

Willenhall

Smashing her back doors in.

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By *icecouple561Couple 27 weeks ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

The beast with two backs.

Having it off

Having it away

Getting your leg over

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By *rthur30Man 27 weeks ago

Warrington

Nookie and bonk.

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By *ady CurvaceousWoman 27 weeks ago

Kent

Bumping uglies

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By *ertifiedCreamerMan 27 weeks ago

Brum

Assault with a friendly weapon

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By *eathrow pineappleCouple 27 weeks ago

Hounslow

Slinging it up her

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By *amieLDN22Man 27 weeks ago

London

Aggressive cuddling

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By *auvignon blancMan 27 weeks ago

Wilts/Somerset

Quoting Rita, Sue & Bob too… “wanna go for a jump?”

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By (user no longer on site) 27 weeks ago

Smash the gash.

Sorry. 🤢😂

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By (user no longer on site) 27 weeks ago

The ol' slap and tickle

A bit of "How's yer father?"

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By *ags73 OP Man 27 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"Bumping uglies"

That is bad.

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By *eathrow pineappleCouple 27 weeks ago

Hounslow

"Aggressive cuddling

"
isn't that another term for the r word?

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By (user no longer on site) 27 weeks ago

A good rogering

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By *abluesbabyMan 27 weeks ago

Gibraltar/Cheshire/London

[Removed by poster at 09/01/25 03:07:35]

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By *.nottsbloke..Man 27 weeks ago

nottinghamshire

To sleep with someone. Last thing on my mind is sleeping

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By (user no longer on site) 27 weeks ago

Shag

Screw

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By *illy IdolMan 27 weeks ago

Midlands

Got the ride

Got my end away

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By *vaRoseWoman 27 weeks ago

Ankh-Morpork

Shakespeare had a good one

“Groping for trout in a peculiar river”

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By *ddie1966Man 27 weeks ago

Paper Town Central, Essex.

Bumping Ugliest

Playing Hide the Sausage.

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By (user no longer on site) 27 weeks ago

Fixed his smart meter.

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By *coobyABCMan 27 weeks ago

Aberdeen

A good pumping

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By (user no longer on site) 27 weeks ago

Hiding the purple headed womb ferret

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By *ynamicnatureMan 27 weeks ago

Doncaster

Doing the mango fandango

Or back in Oz we called it a root

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By *eoBloomsMan 27 weeks ago

Springfield

Quantitive easing

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By (user no longer on site) 27 weeks ago

There's a good few in Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo by the Barenaked Ladies

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By *aramel.desiresMan 27 weeks ago

Laleham

You fancy some. Toad in the hole?

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By (user no longer on site) 27 weeks ago

"You fancy some. Toad in the hole? "

Does it come with gravy and veggie sausages?

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By *mf123Man 27 weeks ago

with one foot out the door

Faf

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan 27 weeks ago

Glasgow / London

‘Horizontal jogging’.

Just no.

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By (user no longer on site) 27 weeks ago

Thanks to Jimmy Carr, I can't unhear lesbian sex as "smashing pasties".

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By (user no longer on site) 27 weeks ago

Parallel Parking

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By *ustAnotherMan 27 weeks ago

brumish

Slipping a length

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By (user no longer on site) 27 weeks ago

Slip her the ferret (Chubby Brown)

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By *aramel.desiresMan 27 weeks ago

Laleham

"You fancy some. Toad in the hole?

Does it come with gravy and veggie sausages?"

You can have it anyway you want it.

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By *ags73 OP Man 27 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"Shakespeare had a good one

“Groping for trout in a peculiar river”"

Guddling for fish would be catching by hand in Scottish. Although I’m not sure I’d say I was guddling with my fingers in a woman though

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By *lder budweiserMan 27 weeks ago

Stirlingshire

Bonking.... Never actually heard anyone saying it in real life

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By *ellinever70Woman 27 weeks ago

Ayrshire

Play...playing

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By (user no longer on site) 27 weeks ago

Unless it is their heads

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By (user no longer on site) 27 weeks ago

Has anyone mentioned

‘Getting jiggy with it' 😜

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By (user no longer on site) 27 weeks ago

A rub

Rough and tumble

Making sweet music together

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By *ags73 OP Man 27 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"A rub

Rough and tumble

Making sweet music together "

‘Sweet, sweet music’ 🤮

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By *rHotNottsMan 27 weeks ago

Dubai & Nottingham

Uphill planting & early morning harvesting are two of my faves.

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By (user no longer on site) 27 weeks ago

"A rub

Rough and tumble

Making sweet music together

‘Sweet, sweet music’ 🤮 "

Well considering my other euphemisms i had to show my softer gentler side 😂

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By *afkaMan 27 weeks ago

Nottingham

"Bonking.... Never actually heard anyone saying it in real life"

⬆️ I guess you're not quite old enough, "bonking" was all the rage in the eighties along with another one that I hate-

"doing it"

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By (user no longer on site) 27 weeks ago

Busting nuts in sugar walls. 🥜

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By *estructionDollyWoman 27 weeks ago

Manchester

I think if anyone asked me if I fancied some rumpy pumpy in a non-ironic way I'd die laughing 😂

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By *estructionDollyWoman 27 weeks ago

Manchester

I actually find "making love" really hokey and over sentimental 🤢

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By *ickeyblueeyes7Man 27 weeks ago

newport

Getting your dick wet

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By *eoBloomsMan 27 weeks ago

Springfield

Putting sauce on the kebab.

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By *rchitectMan 27 weeks ago

Dorchester

A poke in the whiskers.

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By *estructionDollyWoman 27 weeks ago

Manchester

"Putting sauce on the kebab."

🤢🤢🤢

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By *ags73 OP Man 26 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"Putting sauce on the kebab."

That is bad.

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By *eoBloomsMan 26 weeks ago

Springfield

"Putting sauce on the kebab.

That is bad."

You did ask OP !

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By *zeroMan 26 weeks ago

Glasgow

The hunka chunka. Which I've only ever heard in Demolition Man from Sylvester Stallone.

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By *ags73 OP Man 26 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"Putting sauce on the kebab.

That is bad.

You did ask OP !

I know.. I know.. 🤦‍♂️

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By *ags73 OP Man 26 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"The hunka chunka. Which I've only ever heard in Demolition Man from Sylvester Stallone."

That’s a strange one

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By *ophieslutTV/TS 26 weeks ago

Central

"Hiding the purple headed womb ferret "

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By *ild_oatsMan 26 weeks ago

the land of saints & sinners

Put a parting in her hair….

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By (user no longer on site) 26 weeks ago

Taking a ride in the tuna canoe

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By *orny PTMan 26 weeks ago

Peterborough

Burying the sausage

Whitewashing the womb

Knobbing

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By *ripfillMan 26 weeks ago

Paris, New York, Hong Kong and Havant

Havin’ a shag … ( that’s so awful !)

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By *ayo81966Man 26 weeks ago

barnstaple

Making babies

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By *ags73 OP Man 26 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"Taking a ride in the tuna canoe "

😂

‘Pink canoe ride’ I’ve heard.

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By *ags73 OP Man 26 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"Havin’ a shag … ( that’s so awful !) "

So awful 😂

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