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To be a better person
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Be honest with yourself when you are not your best you. Those times when anger, ego, prejudice (don’t go thinking you have no prejudice, we are human), stupidity…. get in the way. Then the harder part, be honest with the people it affected. Don’t expect the other person to reciprocate. |
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"Integrity, responsibility, honesty, respect, empathy and compassion and always one of my favourite one, humility. 
It's amazing how we all say this but it doesn't seem to be happening.
"
It’s because it is meaningless. Things in there are contradictory.
You want to be honest and respectful of people’s feelings. Who doesn’t? Your friend asks if her bum looks big in her new dress. It does. It’s huge. Do you tell the truth and hurt her feelings or do you lie and make her feel better?
Honesty v respect falls at the first hurdle. |
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"Integrity, responsibility, honesty, respect, empathy and compassion and always one of my favourite one, humility.
It's amazing how we all say this but it doesn't seem to be happening.
It’s because it is meaningless. Things in there are contradictory.
You want to be honest and respectful of people’s feelings. Who doesn’t? Your friend asks if her bum looks big in her new dress. It does. It’s huge. Do you tell the truth and hurt her feelings or do you lie and make her feel better?
Honesty v respect falls at the first hurdle."
You simply ask “compared to what”,  |
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By (user no longer on site) 20 weeks ago
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"Be honest with yourself when you are not your best you. Those times when anger, ego, prejudice (don’t go thinking you have no prejudice, we are human), stupidity…. get in the way. Then the harder part, be honest with the people it affected. Don’t expect the other person to reciprocate."
Pretty much this. Be honest with yourself, own your shit and take accountability. Accept the consequences with grace.
We all have moments where we’re not entirely honest with ourselves about why we make certain choices. It’s human. But self-respect and compassion make it easier to face up to those things, take the sting out of shame, and, in turn, make honesty, accountability, and respect more natural to extend to others.
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"Integrity, responsibility, honesty, respect, empathy and compassion and always one of my favourite one, humility.
It's amazing how we all say this but it doesn't seem to be happening.
It’s because it is meaningless. Things in there are contradictory.
You want to be honest and respectful of people’s feelings. Who doesn’t? Your friend asks if her bum looks big in her new dress. It does. It’s huge. Do you tell the truth and hurt her feelings or do you lie and make her feel better?
Honesty v respect falls at the first hurdle."
If it were my friend who asked I'd be honest....that's what friends are for  |
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"Integrity, responsibility, honesty, respect, empathy and compassion and always one of my favourite one, humility.
It's amazing how we all say this but it doesn't seem to be happening.
It’s because it is meaningless. Things in there are contradictory.
You want to be honest and respectful of people’s feelings. Who doesn’t? Your friend asks if her bum looks big in her new dress. It does. It’s huge. Do you tell the truth and hurt her feelings or do you lie and make her feel better?
Honesty v respect falls at the first hurdle.
If it were my friend who asked I'd be honest....that's what friends are for "
That’s the point isn’t it? All the things that MB says are good things but they often rely on someone else to be able to to work properly. Being a better person usually requires the other person to be able to emotionally handle them. I genuinely think you can’t be a good person in insolation. |
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By *avie65Man 20 weeks ago
In the west. |
Help someone when they need it and don’t ask for it for whatever reason. In other words be aware of those around you as they may be struggling and either won’t ask for help or they don’t realise that they need help. |
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By (user no longer on site) 20 weeks ago
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Never underestimate the value of knowledge and new perspectives.
Learning to be a better person to other people and learning to understand them is so valuable no amount of money can buy it |
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"Be honest with yourself when you are not your best you. Those times when anger, ego, prejudice (don’t go thinking you have no prejudice, we are human), stupidity…. get in the way. Then the harder part, be honest with the people it affected. Don’t expect the other person to reciprocate.
Pretty much this. Be honest with yourself, own your shit and take accountability. Accept the consequences with grace.
We all have moments where we’re not entirely honest with ourselves about why we make certain choices. It’s human. But self-respect and compassion make it easier to face up to those things, take the sting out of shame, and, in turn, make honesty, accountability, and respect more natural to extend to others.
"
Someone’s beaten me to it! Being honest with yourself and owning your shit is at the heart of everything for me.
Mrs TMN x |
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Stop saying “You made me feel (add emotion here)”. Take yourself away from this reactive state, own your emotions. Start saying “I feel (add emotion here)”. Now start responding instead of reacting. |
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"Forgiveness.
Have you forgiven me for being Zeus and all the hard work you had to do picking your gods yet? "
I don't think the Greek Gods were big on forgiveness but as Leo I'll forgive you everything. |
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"Forgiveness.
Have you forgiven me for being Zeus and all the hard work you had to do picking your gods yet?
I don't think the Greek Gods were big on forgiveness but as Leo I'll forgive you everything. "
Sweet  |
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To look at the World through another person's lense
Empathise
Listen
Be kind
Take care of your holistic self...Mind, body, soul
Show compassion
Don't take life or yourself too seriously
Self reflect every day. Assess your words, assess your actions
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By *ags73Man 20 weeks ago
glasgow-ish |
I honestly don’t know.
What I do know is that I was a certain way when younger.
I’m not now and that’s life experience and having been through a few things.
I don’t think I knowingly ever went with malicious or bad thoughts about people but perhaps my attempts at humour and covering shyness when younger went the wrong direction and looking back I sort of cringe but also know that I wasn’t sure of how I fitted in various groups and muddled my way.
Same is true of relationships and other things but it’s how it goes.
Maybe you learn patience with people, maybe you learn a bit of empathy, maybe you understand others have things going on too.
That said, can sometimes still get things wrong by drinking ot unintentionally and have regrets.
I suppose that fallibility is being human and can only think things through and try and do better and be better. |
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"I honestly don’t know.
What I do know is that I was a certain way when younger.
I’m not now and that’s life experience and having been through a few things.
I don’t think I knowingly ever went with malicious or bad thoughts about people but perhaps my attempts at humour and covering shyness when younger went the wrong direction and looking back I sort of cringe but also know that I wasn’t sure of how I fitted in various groups and muddled my way.
Same is true of relationships and other things but it’s how it goes.
Maybe you learn patience with people, maybe you learn a bit of empathy, maybe you understand others have things going on too.
That said, can sometimes still get things wrong by drinking ot unintentionally and have regrets.
I suppose that fallibility is being human and can only think things through and try and do better and be better."
Love that reply. I think additionally we have expectations of everything being "right" every time and modern life seems to demand perfection and not support or tolerate mistakes and second chances. That said the reason for the thread was to think about, accepting we are human and not perfect, what can we do to be better. Individually and I guess also collectively. |
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By (user no longer on site) 20 weeks ago
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"I honestly don’t know.
What I do know is that I was a certain way when younger.
I’m not now and that’s life experience and having been through a few things.
I don’t think I knowingly ever went with malicious or bad thoughts about people but perhaps my attempts at humour and covering shyness when younger went the wrong direction and looking back I sort of cringe but also know that I wasn’t sure of how I fitted in various groups and muddled my way.
Same is true of relationships and other things but it’s how it goes.
Maybe you learn patience with people, maybe you learn a bit of empathy, maybe you understand others have things going on too.
That said, can sometimes still get things wrong by drinking ot unintentionally and have regrets.
I suppose that fallibility is being human and can only think things through and try and do better and be better.
Love that reply. I think additionally we have expectations of everything being "right" every time and modern life seems to demand perfection and not support or tolerate mistakes and second chances. That said the reason for the thread was to think about, accepting we are human and not perfect, what can we do to be better. Individually and I guess also collectively. "
All good answers.
Being quick to judge others is something that has become an increasing issue with the advent and rapid popularity of social media.
Approach all individuals with kindness, consideration and empathy.
In addition, we are perfectly entitled to have opinions and find things offensive, but that doesn't mean that we have to voice those opinions, nor do we have the right to expect that people MUST change their behaviour or opinions if we find those behaviours or opinions challenging.
Sadly emotional intelligence isn’t something that can be taught but required the individual to learn through experience and reflection. Some don’t consider themselves to have the time to do that. |
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"I honestly don’t know.
What I do know is that I was a certain way when younger.
I’m not now and that’s life experience and having been through a few things.
I don’t think I knowingly ever went with malicious or bad thoughts about people but perhaps my attempts at humour and covering shyness when younger went the wrong direction and looking back I sort of cringe but also know that I wasn’t sure of how I fitted in various groups and muddled my way.
Same is true of relationships and other things but it’s how it goes.
Maybe you learn patience with people, maybe you learn a bit of empathy, maybe you understand others have things going on too.
That said, can sometimes still get things wrong by drinking ot unintentionally and have regrets.
I suppose that fallibility is being human and can only think things through and try and do better and be better.
Love that reply. I think additionally we have expectations of everything being "right" every time and modern life seems to demand perfection and not support or tolerate mistakes and second chances. That said the reason for the thread was to think about, accepting we are human and not perfect, what can we do to be better. Individually and I guess also collectively.
All good answers.
Being quick to judge others is something that has become an increasing issue with the advent and rapid popularity of social media.
Approach all individuals with kindness, consideration and empathy.
In addition, we are perfectly entitled to have opinions and find things offensive, but that doesn't mean that we have to voice those opinions, nor do we have the right to expect that people MUST change their behaviour or opinions if we find those behaviours or opinions challenging.
Sadly emotional intelligence isn’t something that can be taught but required the individual to learn through experience and reflection. Some don’t consider themselves to have the time to do that. "
Learning to learn is a hell of a skill to have. |
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By *ags73Man 20 weeks ago
glasgow-ish |
"I honestly don’t know.
What I do know is that I was a certain way when younger.
I’m not now and that’s life experience and having been through a few things.
I don’t think I knowingly ever went with malicious or bad thoughts about people but perhaps my attempts at humour and covering shyness when younger went the wrong direction and looking back I sort of cringe but also know that I wasn’t sure of how I fitted in various groups and muddled my way.
Same is true of relationships and other things but it’s how it goes.
Maybe you learn patience with people, maybe you learn a bit of empathy, maybe you understand others have things going on too.
That said, can sometimes still get things wrong by drinking ot unintentionally and have regrets.
I suppose that fallibility is being human and can only think things through and try and do better and be better.
Love that reply. I think additionally we have expectations of everything being "right" every time and modern life seems to demand perfection and not support or tolerate mistakes and second chances. That said the reason for the thread was to think about, accepting we are human and not perfect, what can we do to be better. Individually and I guess also collectively. "
As I said I don’t know.
Had a bad start to year. I happened to do something daft that I regret but, there’s not a rewind button on life and I can’t undo it.
Gave me pause for thought and keep trying in terms of being positive
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My experience is that the 'be kind' people's empathy rarely extends beyond those they already like or feel sympathy for. Look at any political thread on here to see the venom directed at those they don't like. |
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By (user no longer on site) 20 weeks ago
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"My experience is that the 'be kind' people's empathy rarely extends beyond those they already like or feel sympathy for. Look at any political thread on here to see the venom directed at those they don't like. "
hate politics been dragged on to a site that should be just used for fun and nonsense!
Nothing good ever comes from dragging politics up in a forum of any kind !
That’s been said Trump is doing a great job thus far   give credit |
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"My experience is that the 'be kind' people's empathy rarely extends beyond those they already like or feel sympathy for. Look at any political thread on here to see the venom directed at those they don't like.
hate politics been dragged on to a site that should be just used for fun and nonsense!
Nothing good ever comes from dragging politics up in a forum of any kind !
That’s been said Trump is doing a great job thus far give credit "
Oh no he isn't.!
Oh yes he is!
He's behind you |
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By (user no longer on site) 20 weeks ago
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"My experience is that the 'be kind' people's empathy rarely extends beyond those they already like or feel sympathy for. Look at any political thread on here to see the venom directed at those they don't like.
hate politics been dragged on to a site that should be just used for fun and nonsense!
Nothing good ever comes from dragging politics up in a forum of any kind !
That’s been said Trump is doing a great job thus far give credit
Oh no he isn't.!
Oh yes he is!
He's behind you"
Op Lucky there ain’t no far right Americans around these threads no doubt they would of taken that seriously which kinda would of been funny |
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Be better than what?
Better than you have been up to this point?
Better than those around us?
Why does anyone feel the need to be better at this point in their life?
If you've been a complete twat all along the chances are you are only offering lip service to tropes like, be better, be nice, be kind and aren't really committed to the idea.
If you've been a decent human being all along you shouldn't have to be any better than you already are and shouldn't have to prove yourself to those who tell you to be better. |
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"Be better than what?
Better than you have been up to this point?
Better than those around us?
Why does anyone feel the need to be better at this point in their life?
If you've been a complete twat all along the chances are you are only offering lip service to tropes like, be better, be nice, be kind and aren't really committed to the idea.
If you've been a decent human being all along you shouldn't have to be any better than you already are and shouldn't have to prove yourself to those who tell you to be better. "
When did you stop growing? That’s a rhetorical question. |
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"Be better than what?
Better than you have been up to this point?
Better than those around us?
Why does anyone feel the need to be better at this point in their life?
If you've been a complete twat all along the chances are you are only offering lip service to tropes like, be better, be nice, be kind and aren't really committed to the idea.
If you've been a decent human being all along you shouldn't have to be any better than you already are and shouldn't have to prove yourself to those who tell you to be better.
When did you stop growing? That’s a rhetorical question."
We tell people that they are enough so that they understand their value.
Does telling them to be better not do the opposite? |
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"Be better than what?
Better than you have been up to this point?
Better than those around us?
Why does anyone feel the need to be better at this point in their life?
If you've been a complete twat all along the chances are you are only offering lip service to tropes like, be better, be nice, be kind and aren't really committed to the idea.
If you've been a decent human being all along you shouldn't have to be any better than you already are and shouldn't have to prove yourself to those who tell you to be better.
When did you stop growing? That’s a rhetorical question.
We tell people that they are enough so that they understand their value.
Does telling them to be better not do the opposite? "
Nobody here is telling anyone else that they are not enough. We are all work in progress. “There is only one corner of the universe you can be certain of improving, and that’s your own self.” Aldous Huxley. |
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