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Messaging a girl and she uses a different guys name
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Not sure if it's me. But planned to meet a girl and she sent me her number and sent her a message even using part of my user name and she said "is that Dan". She seems to be meeting a guy called Dan a week later. Not sure how to feel had intended to meet but I have to say I feel its a kick in the nuts |
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"Not sure if it's me. But planned to meet a girl and she sent me her number and sent her a message even using part of my user name and she said "is that Dan". She seems to be meeting a guy called Dan a week later. Not sure how to feel had intended to meet but I have to say I feel its a kick in the nuts "
Wow! You don't own her she's allowed to meet who she wants when she wants.
If I was her and read this post I'd certainly not be meeting you. |
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By (user no longer on site) 13 weeks ago
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Did she say she was looking to be exclusive and only meeting you
How do you know this person is just a social or for a meet off here. Maybe a friend
Sounds a tad possessive to me |
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I think in this instance it might be you I’m afraid. Obviously people use this site for different reasons but one of the main ones I imagine is NSA sex. A single woman meeting 2 different men a week apart is perfectly normal as it would be even in the vanilla world |
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By (user no longer on site) 13 weeks ago
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I’m thinking this place isn’t for you OP. You should be thankful that you actually got her number as previous posts suggest and clearly she knows this Dan already. |
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By (user no longer on site) 13 weeks ago
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"Not sure if it's me. But planned to meet a girl and she sent me her number and sent her a message even using part of my user name and she said "is that Dan". She seems to be meeting a guy called Dan a week later. Not sure how to feel had intended to meet but I have to say I feel its a kick in the nuts "
I don’t think swinging is for you chap. You are
Going to get hurt and it’s not going to do your self esteem any good.
Better trying a dating site rather than fab.
I wish you all the luck and happiness in the world ☺️ |
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By *AYENCouple 13 weeks ago
Lincolnshire |
"Not sure if it's me. But planned to meet a girl and she sent me her number and sent her a message even using part of my user name and she said "is that Dan". She seems to be meeting a guy called Dan a week later. Not sure how to feel had intended to meet but I have to say I feel its a kick in the nuts "
As most of the replies above demonstrate, exclusivity is a dirty word on here.
We offer and expect it. If we or he wishes to extend the agreement to another (or others) then it will be discussed and agreed upon, but we clearly state on our profile we're not swingers.
If exclusivity is what you're after, and offer, you need to make it very clear from the start, otherwise don't be surprised when they meet others. K. |
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I'm fairly confident that ths is not a monogamous dating site! 
How many guys she's seeing is not your business and if you're jealous/hurt by her talking to another guy you really need to think about whether you actually want to be here.
Unless you can be relaxed and open about multiple partners maybe a regular vanilla dating site is more your pace?
Blas. |
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By (user no longer on site) 13 weeks ago
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"I'm fairly confident that ths is not a monogamous dating site!
How many guys she's seeing is not your business and if you're jealous/hurt by her talking to another guy you really need to think about whether you actually want to be here.
Unless you can be relaxed and open about multiple partners maybe a regular vanilla dating site is more your pace?
Blas. "
I am of the opinion that your belief is 100% correct |
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"I'm fairly confident that ths is not a monogamous dating site!
How many guys she's seeing is not your business and if you're jealous/hurt by her talking to another guy you really need to think about whether you actually want to be here.
Unless you can be relaxed and open about multiple partners maybe a regular vanilla dating site is more your pace?
Blas.
I am of the opinion that your belief is 100% correct "
Huzzah!! Lovely.. I'm in the right place |
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By (user no longer on site) 13 weeks ago
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"I'd be miffed if someone I planned to meet got me mixed up with someone else "
I agree with this. I get it's a swinging site and people are meeting others, but it really isn't difficult to keep track of who you're chatting to and I would be less inclined to meet someone who mixed me up with someone else. I at least expect them to show an interest in me.
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"Not sure if it's me. But planned to meet a girl and she sent me her number and sent her a message even using part of my user name and she said "is that Dan". She seems to be meeting a guy called Dan a week later. Not sure how to feel had intended to meet but I have to say I feel its a kick in the nuts "
Not sure of the issue is she is meeting someone called Dan or if its that she made a mistake and got your name wrong / confused. Only you know your feelings op. All I'd say is, firstly kudo for getting a reply and a potential meet. it's supposed to be a bit of fun. If it's causing unhappiness... Take a break for a bit. Life's too short for doing shit that makes you unhappy... Or send her a text back and say "is this Wilma? Looking forward to seeing you" but that would be childish. |
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By *agic.MMan 13 weeks ago
Orpington |
My friend you are allowed to feel how ever you feel, your emotions are your emotions...accept them and try to manage them as best you can. Yes this is the sex/swinging site, yes people here are non monogamous and have sex with multiple people...and still some of us are looking for something a bit more meaningful than "just a shag", a bit more connection with the person we have sex with to feel a tiny bit special, and without a doubt you can find that on fab (just takes a bit more time). I too would feel disappointed if I was in your situation, but I would simply see it as not being compatible with that woman, and move on. So please ignore people saying this site is not for you just because you are looking for something a bit more meaningful 🙏. Also to anyone on fab saying a man should feel lucky to get a message from a woman, simply because most men here don't, I raise my middle finger to you 🖕 the same I raise my standards. |
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"You do know this is a swinging site. People meet for sex. They tend to have more than one meet. It seems she's already arranged to meet this guy before you came along.
Not sure what the problem is"
Ha ha ha , very true !!
Maybe some men are looking for more …..
not us we just like SEX  |
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By (user no longer on site) 13 weeks ago
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I'd feel a tad deflated in that situation, tbh. Even if I'm one of a few upcoming meets, I'd hope that they were interested enough in me to remember my name. |
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"My friend you are allowed to feel how ever you feel, your emotions are your emotions...accept them and try to manage them as best you can. Yes this is the sex/swinging site, yes people here are non monogamous and have sex with multiple people...and still some of us are looking for something a bit more meaningful than "just a shag", a bit more connection with the person we have sex with to feel a tiny bit special, and without a doubt you can find that on fab (just takes a bit more time). I too would feel disappointed if I was in your situation, but I would simply see it as not being compatible with that woman, and move on. So please ignore people saying this site is not for you just because you are looking for something a bit more meaningful 🙏. Also to anyone on fab saying a man should feel lucky to get a message from a woman, simply because most men here don't, I raise my middle finger to you 🖕 the same I raise my standards."
I would agree with this, you can be whoever you want to be on this site, it's not just exclusive to 'swingers'. I would feel annoyed, pissed off or whatever too. You do you. |
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"My friend you are allowed to feel how ever you feel, your emotions are your emotions...accept them and try to manage them as best you can. Yes this is the sex/swinging site, yes people here are non monogamous and have sex with multiple people...and still some of us are looking for something a bit more meaningful than "just a shag", a bit more connection with the person we have sex with to feel a tiny bit special, and without a doubt you can find that on fab (just takes a bit more time). I too would feel disappointed if I was in your situation, but I would simply see it as not being compatible with that woman, and move on. So please ignore people saying this site is not for you just because you are looking for something a bit more meaningful 🙏. Also to anyone on fab saying a man should feel lucky to get a message from a woman, simply because most men here don't, I raise my middle finger to you 🖕 the same I raise my standards."
 well said |
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The amount of posts saying swinging might not be for you over this is eye opening. You havent claimed to ‘own’ anyone, not said you expected her to be exclusive so not sure why people are going in on you.
There may be reasons though for her mix up, people here arrange and back out a lot so the lady in question may be keeping her options open and intend to meet you both (or not). I’d find it funny initially if the names were mixed up but it can certainly be seen as disrespectful or demoralising to receive it.
You need a thick skin to be on here and you’ll find out yourself if it’s for you or not, but on this occasion if it doesn’t feel right, don’t meet with her. |
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By *elloWoman 13 weeks ago
alpha centauri |
If you're messaging someone for the first time or even someone you've messaged loads but it's now a new number then isn't it normal to include your name?
You've assumed they'd know who you are and then get a bit miffed that they accidentally get you mixed up with someone else 
I personally don't believe that exclusivity should be assumed, you want exclusivity then that's absolutely fine, but you have to tell the person , not everyone automatically things that arranging to meet for the first time means you should shut up shop, us unattached people like to keep our options open. |
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OP, have you never got someone's name mixed up in your entire life?
I'd just reply with a haha no it's X. People make mistakes all the time, I'm more inclined to think this is a simple mix up rather than anything negative on her part. |
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By *ornycougaWoman 13 weeks ago
WHEREVER I LAY MY HAT |
"OP texted her his number but not his name. She had presumably been exchanging numbers with Dan too. Seems quite easy to make the mistake when OP didn't add his name to the message. "
Yeah I have done this many times when guys just message Hi or Hey as an opener and I have asked who it is. That's on them.
I was once chatting to two guys simultaneously and got them mixed up and messaged the wrong one about a meet. I did feel bad about that and was apologetic but the guy took it on the chin. As everyone else has said - no expectation of exclusivity on here (or indeed on any vanilla dating sites if you haven't even met). |
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By *elloWoman 13 weeks ago
alpha centauri |
If I had accidentally done this I would have loved it if the guys response was a light-hearted 'No it's not Dan, and it's not tom, dick , Harry, or even the English rugby team, it's .....' I would have laughed my tits off, and bumped you up the list |
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"My friend you are allowed to feel how ever you feel, your emotions are your emotions...accept them and try to manage them as best you can. Yes this is the sex/swinging site, yes people here are non monogamous and have sex with multiple people...and still some of us are looking for something a bit more meaningful than "just a shag", a bit more connection with the person we have sex with to feel a tiny bit special, and without a doubt you can find that on fab (just takes a bit more time). I too would feel disappointed if I was in your situation, but I would simply see it as not being compatible with that woman, and move on. So please ignore people saying this site is not for you just because you are looking for something a bit more meaningful 🙏. Also to anyone on fab saying a man should feel lucky to get a message from a woman, simply because most men here don't, I raise my middle finger to you 🖕 the same I raise my standards."
Agreed. |
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Not knowing who you are from the first message on another platform doesn't seem like a big deal.
And on a swinging site, unless there's been an outright discussion on exclusivity then it's pretty expected that people will keep doing their thing.
I get that it sucks. I would find a 'is this X' almost an indication that they were hoping it was X rather than me. But I can be an oversensitive overthinker, and it likely just means they were just in the middle of setting things up with X.
You can feel how you feel OP. Maybe examine why you're having the reaction you are in case you can reason it out rather than throw it in the bin or go through with something you're not actually into any more 💜 |
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"If you're messaging someone for the first time or even someone you've messaged loads but it's now a new number then isn't it normal to include your name?
You've assumed they'd know who you are and then get a bit miffed that they accidentally get you mixed up with someone else
I personally don't believe that exclusivity should be assumed, you want exclusivity then that's absolutely fine, but you have to tell the person , not everyone automatically things that arranging to meet for the first time means you should shut up shop, us unattached people like to keep our options open."
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"Not sure if it's me. But planned to meet a girl and she sent me her number and sent her a message even using part of my user name and she said "is that Dan". She seems to be meeting a guy called Dan a week later. Not sure how to feel had intended to meet but I have to say I feel its a kick in the nuts "
Why do you care who a stranger meets You need to learn to not use your emotional head in this game if you want to play properly my man |
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By (user no longer on site) 13 weeks ago
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Don't you know only women can get miffed with these things on here?
It can be tricky moving from here to another platform. Often people don't have a profile picture or its not of themselves.
I'll be honest I'm not good at remembering real names, especially when you've spoken on here for a while and gotten used to their usernames. If you mentioned your real name once, a while ago please don't assume I'll remember it. Perhaps this is the case with the lady in question.
I can see why your disappointed, but try and get past it if you can. You never know where it might lead.
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"Not sure if it's me. But planned to meet a girl and she sent me her number and sent her a message even using part of my user name and she said "is that Dan". She seems to be meeting a guy called Dan a week later. Not sure how to feel had intended to meet but I have to say I feel its a kick in the nuts "
We have sometimes received a message from a person we've been talking to for a while and they suddenly use someone else's name. We're not bothered that they're meeting other people but we are bothered that they don't care enough to keep up with who's who. Itakes us feel as if we're not particularly important to them. Of course we know the reality of swinging and that we're all disposable fucks at the end of the day but at least make the effort to treat people as individuals in the moment.
You deserve to be treated as an individual. Considering the number of people who say they like a 'connection' and to get to know a person etc I'm surprised by some of the replies here and wonder if a woman would have had the same reaction 🤔 |
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"You can't put the blame on the women if he didn't sign with his name. How would she know who it is. If he had signed with his name there wouldn't of been this problem. She's not a mind reader"
Oh 🤔 I didn't get that. Was it a first message?
I'm going to back track then. How was she supposed to know who he was? |
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By *ripfillMan 13 weeks ago
Paris, New York, Hong Kong and Havant |
Yesterday I sent a message after a meet of thanks and in the message, relived moments of pleasurable bliss … together
However
I only to sent to another fab friend ! Embarrassing! 😳 |
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"You can't put the blame on the women if he didn't sign with his name. How would she know who it is. If he had signed with his name there wouldn't of been this problem. She's not a mind reader
Oh 🤔 I didn't get that. Was it a first message?
I'm going to back track then. How was she supposed to know who he was? "
Yes, it was a first message and he just used part of his user name |
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"You can't put the blame on the women if he didn't sign with his name. How would she know who it is. If he had signed with his name there wouldn't of been this problem. She's not a mind reader
Oh 🤔 I didn't get that. Was it a first message?
I'm going to back track then. How was she supposed to know who he was? Yes, it was a first message and he just used part of his user name"
Ok. It's a bit dismissive though isn't it. The equivalent of receiving a
'who's this?' response to a message.
I can see why he feels miffed but can also see how she made the mistake. |
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No one wants to feel like they’ve just taken a ticket, so can understand your feeling.
It can feel like a kick in the gut if you feel the chat is going well and you’re moving on to the next stage.
Swinging has different levels - we very like the fact that we still have a foot in vanilla world as well as swinging.
K |
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The responses (plus added sycophancy) would be marginally different if a woman had posted this.
Of course we are all in the milieu of swinging, but if you have an imminent meet lined up, established sufficient chemistry with chatting and then someone forgets your name it's totally understandable to feel disconcerted. It's called being "human"...and men also have "feelings".
And for those who say this is a swinging site. No, it isn't. It was, once upon a time, but •not exclusively so•. I'm not a swinger and this place gives me all the aspects associated with dates, socials and romance. |
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"Not sure if it's me. But planned to meet a girl and she sent me her number and sent her a message even using part of my user name and she said "is that Dan". She seems to be meeting a guy called Dan a week later. Not sure how to feel had intended to meet but I have to say I feel its a kick in the nuts "
You think you're exclusive on here? 🤣 🤦♂️ |
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"Not sure if it's me. But planned to meet a girl and she sent me her number and sent her a message even using part of my user name and she said "is that Dan". She seems to be meeting a guy called Dan a week later. Not sure how to feel had intended to meet but I have to say I feel its a kick in the nuts "
Its a swinging site, jealousy is not good esp if u have no connection rn |
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"No one wants to feel like they’ve just taken a ticket, so can understand your feeling.
It can feel like a kick in the gut if you feel the chat is going well and you’re moving on to the next stage.
Swinging has different levels - we very like the fact that we still have a foot in vanilla world as well as swinging.
K"
We couldn’t care less if people we chat to meet others as long as their focus was on us when chatting or leading up to meeting.
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By *elloWoman 13 weeks ago
alpha centauri |
"No one wants to feel like they’ve just taken a ticket, so can understand your feeling.
It can feel like a kick in the gut if you feel the chat is going well and you’re moving on to the next stage.
Swinging has different levels - we very like the fact that we still have a foot in vanilla world as well as swinging.
K"
Even away from the site, in the vanilla world I wouldn't assume we were exclusive unless we had a talk about it and decided yes we want this to be something meaningful and both agree to exclusivity.
I had a discussion like this with my parents and they said it was childish as if you're children saying 'will you be my boyfriend' so I asked them if they really thought that arranging a first date with someone you've just met so don't know if you're compatible means that you should dismiss someone else be because you saw the other person first.
What happens if you go on the date realise you've made a terrible mistake and the best one slipped by.
I think having an outright discussion about how you both see the relationship going and that neither person should see anyone is is sensible and grown up. My parents think it's childish.
Everyone will have and is entitled to their own opinion, but without communication straight away about how you see things like this then unfortunately incidences like this will occur.
And that relevant to both the swinging and vanilla world.
Don't let people say this isn't the place for you, everyone is welcome here, just remember communicating is the key. |
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I think we all agree we all do things our own way on here
For all we know she could of been organising a gangbang at the same time.
I would be miffed if I sent someone my number a d signed my name to get mixed up with someone else. But this isn't the case because he DIDNT sign his name.
When I used to start talking to guys I would automatically assume they where talking to others it would never enter my head I was the only one.
The only thing I cared about was when we met they completely gave me their all and made me feel special.
We need to find people we are compatible with and you only do that with clear communication. It just seems like the op and this girl arnt compatable |
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This site is largely, although not exclusively, about people having no strings sex. Some may be in relationships and others join them but sexual exclusivity isn't the norm.
It's reasonable to engage with multiple people, as many of them will not lead to even meeting, due to most people not being mutually compatible.
Unless you have a relationship with someone that has monogamy at its core, you can't reasonably expect someone from here to not engage with others.
Perhaps this woman sensed something wasn't quite right and created this notional other guy, to test the OP and the situation. |
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"Not sure if it's me. But planned to meet a girl and she sent me her number and sent her a message even using part of my user name and she said "is that Dan". She seems to be meeting a guy called Dan a week later. Not sure how to feel had intended to meet but I have to say I feel its a kick in the nuts "
So she sent her number and you didn't reply back to say it's me - xxxx name and now you are cross that she's called you a different name?!
Its so easy to get confused with usernames on here that I'm not surprised she didn't know who it was
If you are that sensitive just delete her number |
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"My friend you are allowed to feel how ever you feel, your emotions are your emotions...accept them and try to manage them as best you can. Yes this is the sex/swinging site, yes people here are non monogamous and have sex with multiple people...and still some of us are looking for something a bit more meaningful than "just a shag", a bit more connection with the person we have sex with to feel a tiny bit special, and without a doubt you can find that on fab (just takes a bit more time). I too would feel disappointed if I was in your situation, but I would simply see it as not being compatible with that woman, and move on. So please ignore people saying this site is not for you just because you are looking for something a bit more meaningful 🙏. Also to anyone on fab saying a man should feel lucky to get a message from a woman, simply because most men here don't, I raise my middle finger to you 🖕 the same I raise my standards."
Couldn’t have put it better
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What did you do op?
I do get it though, nobody wants to feel like they're just another number to someone, even on here.
On the other hand, people do often chat to several people at once on this site.
If I'm chatting and may want to take it further, noting someones name in private notes is something I always do. |
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By (user no longer on site) 13 weeks ago
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Kind of odd seeing some of these comments about people not being exclusive and this site not being for the OP.
I can't tell you how many women I've seen saying they're exclusive to FWB.
Not to mention it's still respectful not to be telling other people there are other meets or making it obvious that you're just another person.
I know for a fact a lot of women on fab who don't want to be with guys who sleep around a lot.
OP, I get it, you don't like the idea of being treated like an option or just another dick for her to masturbate with. My advice, walk away if it makes you feel uncomfortable. Know your worth dude. The fact you got a meet among the hoarder of single men on fab is a good start. There will be others you will have a better time with and I hope you find them ✌️ |
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"Her inbox is probably more than busy. Just be thankful you're one of the ones she chose to speak to."
There’s so much of this mindset. Why should he be thankful? So many men think they should be thankful for what they get. No wonder I rarely find anyone I like on here 😩 |
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By *elloWoman 13 weeks ago
alpha centauri |
"Her inbox is probably more than busy. Just be thankful you're one of the ones she chose to speak to.
There’s so much of this mindset. Why should he be thankful? So many men think they should be thankful for what they get. No wonder I rarely find anyone I like on here 😩"
Agree.
I hope the men I chat with don't think 'oh well I'll keep chatting to her because there's noone else' I don't want to be the person under the bottom of the barrel that's been scrapped clean , wouldn't that mean that if a women they deem to be better than me started messaging them I'd be instantly ignored and blocked  |
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"Her inbox is probably more than busy. Just be thankful you're one of the ones she chose to speak to."
·
Typical non-solidarity response from a 'man' who doesn't know any better.
Why should he be thankful? |
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"Her inbox is probably more than busy. Just be thankful you're one of the ones she chose to speak to.
There’s so much of this mindset. Why should he be thankful? So many men think they should be thankful for what they get. No wonder I rarely find anyone I like on here 😩
Agree.
I hope the men I chat with don't think 'oh well I'll keep chatting to her because there's noone else' I don't want to be the person under the bottom of the barrel that's been scrapped clean , wouldn't that mean that if a women they deem to be better than me started messaging them I'd be instantly ignored and blocked "
Not quite what meant but fare cop. I didn't communicate that very well. Apologies to anyone I may have offended. I could have done better and will be sure to correct my mistake
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"Don't you know only women can get miffed with these things on here?
It can be tricky moving from here to another platform. Often people don't have a profile picture or its not of themselves.
I'll be honest I'm not good at remembering real names, especially when you've spoken on here for a while and gotten used to their usernames. If you mentioned your real name once, a while ago please don't assume I'll remember it. Perhaps this is the case with the lady in question.
I can see why your disappointed, but try and get past it if you can. You never know where it might lead.
"
I'm very Frank and Earnest when it comes to women, in Reading I'm Frank in London I'm Earnest  |
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"Not sure if it's me. But planned to meet a girl and she sent me her number and sent her a message even using part of my user name and she said "is that Dan". She seems to be meeting a guy called Dan a week later. Not sure how to feel had intended to meet but I have to say I feel its a kick in the nuts "
It's you. Who else can it be?
Your reaction , your expectations, your assumptions , your disappointment.
You
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Its not about exclusive it's about just being organized. I have exes and weirdnisnt how you all think getting the name wrong is cool as we all know people have history and current people but call your exes name is a massive no no
I have more than one friend and I would annoy them if I mixed them up. They all know I have more than one friend but it's a matter of simple courtesy not to mix names of friends up in no matter how many you have. |
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By *elloWoman 13 weeks ago
alpha centauri |
"Its not about exclusive it's about just being organized. I have exes and weirdnisnt how you all think getting the name wrong is cool as we all know people have history and current people but call your exes name is a massive no no
I have more than one friend and I would annoy them if I mixed them up. They all know I have more than one friend but it's a matter of simple courtesy not to mix names of friends up in no matter how many you have."
I have children, they get called billions of names before I remember what theirs are, I even called them the cats names by mistake, this is very common when interacting with people, courtesy goes out the window when you're trying to deal with people , urgh people |
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By *bi HaiveMan 13 weeks ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
It's not expensive to change your name via deedpoll.
Just change it to Dan and hey, presto....problem solved.
*also works if you want to save money on a private number plate as long as you don't mind having to sign your name A393 UGO for ever more. 😉 |
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"Its not about exclusive it's about just being organized. I have exes and weirdnisnt how you all think getting the name wrong is cool as we all know people have history and current people but call your exes name is a massive no no
I have more than one friend and I would annoy them if I mixed them up. They all know I have more than one friend but it's a matter of simple courtesy not to mix names of friends up in no matter how many you have."
I didn’t think you’d told her your name? |
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"Not sure if it's me. But planned to meet a girl and she sent me her number and sent her a message even using part of my user name and she said "is that Dan". She seems to be meeting a guy called Dan a week later. Not sure how to feel had intended to meet but I have to say I feel its a kick in the nuts
It's you. Who else can it be?
Your reaction , your expectations, your assumptions , your disappointment.
You
"
Clearly people feel the same though, so not ‘just him’ who feels this way. |
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By *avinaTVTV/TS 13 weeks ago
Transsexual Transylvania |
"Its not about exclusive it's about just being organized. I have exes and weirdnisnt how you all think getting the name wrong is cool as we all know people have history and current people but call your exes name is a massive no no
I have more than one friend and I would annoy them if I mixed them up. They all know I have more than one friend but it's a matter of simple courtesy not to mix names of friends up in no matter how many you have.
I have children, they get called billions of names before I remember what theirs are, I even called them the cats names by mistake, this is very common when interacting with people, courtesy goes out the window when you're trying to deal with people , urgh people "
When calling me, my mum often used to recite the names of the entire family, (including the dogs!) before she got to me! (4 siblings, 2 dogs!). 🤣 |
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"Its not about exclusive it's about just being organized. I have exes and weirdnisnt how you all think getting the name wrong is cool as we all know people have history and current people but call your exes name is a massive no no
I have more than one friend and I would annoy them if I mixed them up. They all know I have more than one friend but it's a matter of simple courtesy not to mix names of friends up in no matter how many you have."
But she didn't know your name |
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By *riel13Woman 13 weeks ago
Northampton |
So you're assuming that because she is talking to someone else she is fucking them and wants to fuck you? People are allowed to talk to multiple people for many different reasons, on here or not... Grow up |
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"Think you might be in the wrong place if it bothers you that a lady you haven't even met yet has arranged to meet another guy.
Just saying, "
it's not that I am jealous I can just imagine how it would be round the other way. I'm a true equal rights kind of guy and weirdly calling a woman by another woman's name seems to hit a nerve, no matter the situation |
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"So you're assuming that because she is talking to someone else she is fucking them and wants to fuck you? People are allowed to talk to multiple people for many different reasons, on here or not... Grow up"
you miss understans I know she is. But it's pretty simple not to mistake who is who
|
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"Not sure if it's me. But planned to meet a girl and she sent me her number and sent her a message even using part of my user name and she said "is that Dan". She seems to be meeting a guy called Dan a week later. Not sure how to feel had intended to meet but I have to say I feel its a kick in the nuts "
First gentley tell her who you are and check that she is still up for meeting you.
Then go and enjoy the meet, if you make a good impression she will probably ask you back.
If you want a isomorphic relationship don't hang around on a swinging site.
....we're you intending on more than one woman, if so why should she be restricted! |
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"So you're assuming that because she is talking to someone else she is fucking them and wants to fuck you? People are allowed to talk to multiple people for many different reasons, on here or not... Grow up you miss understans I know she is. But it's pretty simple not to mistake who is who "
But you still haven't said how she was supposed to know it was you as you hadn't given her your name
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By *elloWoman 13 weeks ago
alpha centauri |
"Imagine if you did this to a woman.....it would be a different story lol. "
Don't think it would a different story.
Some people saying this place not for you
Some people saying you right to feel like that.
Some people saying what's the harm.
That's what would be said to a woman too , |
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By *irsSubCouple 13 weeks ago
Darlington |
"So you're assuming that because she is talking to someone else she is fucking them and wants to fuck you? People are allowed to talk to multiple people for many different reasons, on here or not... Grow up you miss understans I know she is. But it's pretty simple not to mistake who is who "
If it wasn't for the private note section we would make this mistake a lot. I'm crap with names, and when you're talking to multiple it's really easy to get mistaken. Single ladies just have so much choice that I can relate to her mistake. |
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"Imagine if you did this to a woman.....it would be a different story lol.
I honestly don’t think I’d care especially if I hadn’t actually given him my name and only part of my username "
Someone else who gets it |
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"She is not your girlfriend.
It's not a dating site
•
It is a dating site. 🌿"
It's a swingers site that some use for dating. Can use this site for what you like but it's still a swingers site. Otherwise it wouldn't be called fabswingers |
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I can guarantee she probably feels as mortified as you do.....
I speak from experience.
It depends entirely on the nature of the conversation you have had thus far.
But, this a swinging site, one shouldn't presume exclusivity if it hasn't been discussed before
|
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"She is not your girlfriend.
It's not a dating site
•
It is a dating site. 🌿It's a swingers site that some use for dating. Can use this site for what you like but it's still a swingers site. Otherwise it wouldn't be called fabswingers"
•
Perhaps it's (still) called Fabswingers because that's the name from its genesis. It's evolved since then.
Carphone Warehouse™ hasn't sold carphones for years, let alone from a warehouse. 🙂 |
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"She is not your girlfriend.
It's not a dating site
•
It is a dating site. 🌿It's a swingers site that some use for dating. Can use this site for what you like but it's still a swingers site. Otherwise it wouldn't be called fabswingers
•
Perhaps it's (still) called Fabswingers because that's the name from its genesis. It's evolved since then.
Carphone Warehouse™ hasn't sold carphones for years, let alone from a warehouse. 🙂"
|
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"She is not your girlfriend.
It's not a dating site
•
It is a dating site. 🌿It's a swingers site that some use for dating. Can use this site for what you like but it's still a swingers site. Otherwise it wouldn't be called fabswingers
•
Perhaps it's (still) called Fabswingers because that's the name from its genesis. It's evolved since then.
Carphone Warehouse™ hasn't sold carphones for years, let alone from a warehouse. 🙂"
we will have to beg to differ. It's a big old site and from what I see the majority of people here are still swingera |
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By *ags73Man 13 weeks ago
glasgow-ish |
"Not sure if it's me. But planned to meet a girl and she sent me her number and sent her a message even using part of my user name and she said "is that Dan". She seems to be meeting a guy called Dan a week later. Not sure how to feel had intended to meet but I have to say I feel its a kick in the nuts "
I’m going to give her the benefit of the doubt and say unintended.
We all make mistakes and tempering fan names and real names and everything else can be a bit much on the head, especially if you’ve real life stuff too going on.
Keep chatting to her, I’m sure she didn’t mean it |
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"Not sure if it's me. But planned to meet a girl and she sent me her number and sent her a message even using part of my user name and she said "is that Dan". She seems to be meeting a guy called Dan a week later. Not sure how to feel had intended to meet but I have to say I feel its a kick in the nuts "
I like to be glass half full on these things... after a lot of considered thoughts ... i have come to a conclusion
I think she is into roleplay go forth and sew those wild oats ... shag... |
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By (user no longer on site) 13 weeks ago
|
I can feel your pain here but, I haven’t had such experience before haha
I can only liked your disappointment to a lady calling some other guy’s name while both of you were having passionate time in bed |
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"She is not your girlfriend.
It's not a dating site
•
It is a dating site. 🌿It's a swingers site that some use for dating. Can use this site for what you like but it's still a swingers site. Otherwise it wouldn't be called fabswingers"
An interesting observation match interestingly enough is a dating site but doesn't sell matches. And tinder also a dating site but... Still what's in a brand name.? |
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"She is not your girlfriend.
It's not a dating site
•
It is a dating site. 🌿It's a swingers site that some use for dating. Can use this site for what you like but it's still a swingers site. Otherwise it wouldn't be called fabswingers
An interesting observation match interestingly enough is a dating site but doesn't sell matches. And tinder also a dating site but... Still what's in a brand name.? "
As I said to Nero we will have to beg to differ |
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"You do know this is a swinging site. People meet for sex. They tend to have more than one meet. It seems she's already arranged to meet this guy before you came along.
Not sure what the problem is"
This, "in our opinion" is one of the issues with Fab pepople think its a dating site, which it is not, its a swingers site.
The two are very very diffrent.
|
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"She is not your girlfriend.
It's not a dating site
•
It is a dating site. 🌿It's a swingers site that some use for dating. Can use this site for what you like but it's still a swingers site. Otherwise it wouldn't be called fabswingers
•
Perhaps it's (still) called Fabswingers because that's the name from its genesis. It's evolved since then.
Carphone Warehouse™ hasn't sold carphones for years, let alone from a warehouse. 🙂"
The difference is there are no carphones now. There are swingers trying to find swingers. It's very difficult when on a swinging site where people don't swing. |
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minute!
worcester
You lot really have made my day. I do love how you either seem to think I expect a girl to be exclusive. The fact a girl isn't and has experience and loves sex is the best thing about meeting girls off here.
I am not looking for a wife. I just mean getting your name wrong when you spoke seconds before revealed part of my user name and yet she called me by another guys name it was the best antidote for the horn since thinking about Maggie Thatcher naked.
She was super apologetic. And all the feminist ladies who seem to love to post things outx yet I bet you if one of your female friends said guess what that guy I was seeing called another girl's name you would be on her like a rash saying get rid.
You all take this far to seriously. but really if you want to kill the horn this is an amazing way
Delete message text (delete only available to you for the next couple of minutes |
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"You do know this is a swinging site. People meet for sex. They tend to have more than one meet. It seems she's already arranged to meet this guy before you came along.
Not sure what the problem is
This, "in our opinion" is one of the issues with Fab pepople think its a dating site, which it is not, its a swingers site.
The two are very very diffrent.
Oh I didnt relise that forgetting who you are talking to is the in thing in swingers. My bad.
"
|
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"Maybe if you feel that way then it’s not for you as I guess some people who use a site like this will sleep with many people. I don’t myself, but then I’m a boring sod. "
I meet about 13 clients a day and never misname them. Maybe I just expect a higher level of cognitive function. I suppose there are incredibly thick people in swinging as well |
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By *bi HaiveMan 13 weeks ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"That's forgivablem.i am not even upset it was funny. Waste of time as it massively killed the mood. I don't expect to find a wife here I just expect common decency "
Define 'common decency' though. 🤷♂️
*and finding a wife here is definitely possible. Either your own, or someone else's....... |
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"Maybe if you feel that way then it’s not for you as I guess some people who use a site like this will sleep with many people. I don’t myself, but then I’m a boring sod.
I meet about 13 clients a day and never misname them. Maybe I just expect a higher level of cognitive function. I suppose there are incredibly thick people in swinging as well "
Forgetting names isn't an indicator of intelligence.
I call my children and grandchildren by each others' names and I'm not "thick". |
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"I can feel your pain here but, I haven’t had such experience before haha
I can only liked your disappointment to a lady calling some other guy’s name while both of you were having passionate time in bed"
I did that once called an girl my ex's name. We had a lovely white fan that suddenly turned almost poo coloured brown instantly.
|
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" minute!
worcester
You lot really have made my day. I do love how you either seem to think I expect a girl to be exclusive. The fact a girl isn't and has experience and loves sex is the best thing about meeting girls off here.
I am not looking for a wife. I just mean getting your name wrong when you spoke seconds before revealed part of my user name and yet she called me by another guys name it was the best antidote for the horn since thinking about Maggie Thatcher naked.
She was super apologetic. And all the feminist ladies who seem to love to post things outx yet I bet you if one of your female friends said guess what that guy I was seeing called another girl's name you would be on her like a rash saying get rid.
You all take this far to seriously. but really if you want to kill the horn this is an amazing way
Delete message text (delete only available to you for the next couple of minutes"
So had you told her your actual name? Seeing someone implies having met and a certain level of exclusivity in which case it would be a big deal to use the wrong name but as I’ve read it you haven’t met yet? You are entitled to feel however you want about the situation though without being made to feel your feelings aren’t valid |
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"Its not about exclusive it's about just being organized. I have exes and weirdnisnt how you all think getting the name wrong is cool as we all know people have history and current people but call your exes name is a massive no no
I have more than one friend and I would annoy them if I mixed them up. They all know I have more than one friend but it's a matter of simple courtesy not to mix names of friends up in no matter how many you have.
I have children, they get called billions of names before I remember what theirs are, I even called them the cats names by mistake, this is very common when interacting with people, courtesy goes out the window when you're trying to deal with people , urgh people "
I don't have children or cats and I forget people's names all the time.....Which is why I don't talk to multiple people on the site at once.
The worst thing is at the regular club, there's two Matts, two Deans....4 Andrew, Andy, Andrea and Andie... and about 3 Tony's.... Lol!
with the perimenopuase, the autistic brain likes for some reason to forget the names of people I've known for years....
Personally I get call all sort because I go by three different names in the swinging community. Lol! And for some reason people can't pronounce my 2 syllable real first name....I give up.
Yeah some of us do not have that organised part of our brain especially for people that we have just met.
I remember people more when I've met them in person multiple times and had a long conversation with them.
Also people on Fab do have some of the most unimaginative usernames...so just type "kink""sex""couple""big""black" into the search and we get like 5000 men. Lol! |
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"Not sure if it's me. But planned to meet a girl and she sent me her number and sent her a message even using part of my user name and she said "is that Dan". She seems to be meeting a guy called Dan a week later. Not sure how to feel had intended to meet but I have to say I feel its a kick in the nuts "
So you change message platforms, do not tell her who you are and are upset that she does not know who you are. Why are you surprised? |
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By *eliWoman 13 weeks ago
. |
If you're uncomfortable with it OP? You're uncomfortable with it.
Yes, it's you. It could easily be any number of other people though - how you're feeling is how you feel. Decide what you want to do and go from. Sometimes you're not compatible with another person from the site. It doesn't mean either is wrong with their approach, it does mean it wouldn't work. |
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"Not sure if it's me. But planned to meet a girl and she sent me her number and sent her a message even using part of my user name and she said "is that Dan". She seems to be meeting a guy called Dan a week later. Not sure how to feel had intended to meet but I have to say I feel its a kick in the nuts "
Okies; I’ve read through the whole thread, but come back to your original post.
Wasn’t it interesting the way the thread started out with women and (presumably) the female half of couples jumping on the bandwagon of “it’s a swinger site, people meet lots of people, nobody discussed exclusivity!” ?
Then followed a few “Oh, count yourself lucky mate” posts….. 
In all fairness OP; the lady COULD have phrased the message “I’m terrible with names, remind me please?” but you COULD have been more forthcoming with your name in the first place too…
If she was planning to meet this guy Dan the week after you, I would be doing my best to make her forget Dan after I’d met her this week….  |
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"She is not your girlfriend.
It's not a dating site
•
It is a dating site. 🌿It's a swingers site that some use for dating. Can use this site for what you like but it's still a swingers site. Otherwise it wouldn't be called fabswingers
•
Perhaps it's (still) called Fabswingers because that's the name from its genesis. It's evolved since then.
Carphone Warehouse™ hasn't sold carphones for years, let alone from a warehouse. 🙂"
I have Never once thought that I was coming here to find dates.
Yes, I've met some people a number if times but I would never think I'm dating them unless we had that conversation.
I'd assume that they are here to have swinging meets until we discuss anything else.
Even dating you have no rights over someone else.
It's their choice. |
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I have forgotten the names of some of the people that I have put my penis in.
It may be that there are some whose names I never knew, and some who definitely didn't tell me their real name. One of which had her actual name on a necklace. She giggled when I noticed and paused for a moment whilst fucking her. I can't remember the name on the chain either.
I am feeling all biblical because I have had a hot cross bun. Let he without sin cast the first stone. |
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"I have forgotten the names of some of the people that I have put my penis in.
It may be that there are some whose names I never knew, and some who definitely didn't tell me their real name. One of which had her actual name on a necklace. She giggled when I noticed and paused for a moment whilst fucking her. I can't remember the name on the chain either.
I am feeling all biblical because I have had a hot cross bun. Let he without sin cast the first stone."
 |
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"Forgot this was still going
I kind of hoped it wasn’t 😂It's been entertaining
It has, ended up a good thread but think it ran its course..wonder if OP carried on texting her?"
Maybe he will come back and tell us |
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"Should we keep commenting until he does?op, op come back wherever you are, where curious(nosey)to find out the outcome
Just clicked on his account to see if he’s active and I’m blocked..?😂"
ha ha and guess what so am I |
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"Should we keep commenting until he does?op, op come back wherever you are, where curious(nosey)to find out the outcome
Just clicked on his account to see if he’s active and I’m blocked..?😂ha ha and guess what so am I "
Unless he’s banned?!😂
High fiving you in solidarity haha |
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"Should we keep commenting until he does?op, op come back wherever you are, where curious(nosey)to find out the outcome
Just clicked on his account to see if he’s active and I’m blocked..?😂ha ha and guess what so am I
Unless he’s banned?!😂
High fiving you in solidarity haha"
ha, guess it will be one of life's mysteries |
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"Should we keep commenting until he does?op, op come back wherever you are, where curious(nosey)to find out the outcome
Just clicked on his account to see if he’s active and I’m blocked..?😂ha ha and guess what so am I "
Me too 🫢 |
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By (user no longer on site) 13 weeks ago
|
"Not sure if it's me. But planned to meet a girl and she sent me her number and sent her a message even using part of my user name and she said "is that Dan". She seems to be meeting a guy called Dan a week later. Not sure how to feel had intended to meet but I have to say I feel its a kick in the nuts "
Sounds like you fell in love 😂😂 |
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