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Dry humour

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By *agic.M OP Man 11 weeks ago

Orpington

Share some of your driest jokes below 👇

I'll start...

"I haven't spoken to my wife in 3 years...I don't want to interrupt her"

"To the person that invented the number zero...thanks for nothing"

"I sympathise with batteries...I'm also not included anywhere"

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By (user no longer on site) 11 weeks ago

I didn’t want to believe it when my Dad got sacked for stealing from his job working on the roads.

But when i went round to his house, all the signs were there.

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By *adbod2godbodMan 11 weeks ago

Manchester

Im the youngest of a family of 3.

My parents are both older

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By (user no longer on site) 11 weeks ago

I fainted in the curry house when i heard REM had split up.

That’s me in the korma

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By *estructionDollyWoman 11 weeks ago

Manchester

I hate Russian dolls... they're just so full of themselves.

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By *dventuresWithEveWoman 11 weeks ago

SW Birmingham outskirts

What's the leading cause for dry skin? Towels.

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By *agic.M OP Man 11 weeks ago

Orpington

I have two unwritten rules when it comes to fab...

and

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By *adbod2godbodMan 11 weeks ago

Manchester

Rice is great if you're hungry and want a thousand of something

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By *olyGlamorousWoman 11 weeks ago

Altrincham

"Share some of your driest jokes below 👇

I'll start...

"I haven't spoken to my wife in 3 years...I don't want to interrupt her"

"To the person that invented the number zero...thanks for nothing"

"I sympathise with batteries...I'm also not included anywhere""

The batteries one took me far too long 🫣

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By *dventuresWithEveWoman 11 weeks ago

SW Birmingham outskirts

"I have two unwritten rules when it comes to fab...

and

2."

Good one! 🤣

I have a joke about chemistry, but I don’t think it will get a reaction.

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By *dventuresWithEveWoman 11 weeks ago

SW Birmingham outskirts

What's the difference between 'Oooh!' and 'Aaah!'?

About three inches.

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By *dventuresWithEveWoman 11 weeks ago

SW Birmingham outskirts

What is Peter Pan’s favorite place to eat out?

Wendy’s.

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By *agic.M OP Man 11 weeks ago

Orpington

What do you call a lazy doctor? .... Dr. Do Little

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By *aizyWoman 11 weeks ago

west midlands

Why don't cannibals eat clowns? Because they taste funny.

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By *agic.M OP Man 11 weeks ago

Orpington

What is brown and sticky? 👀... a stick 🪠

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By *arrenhertsmanMan 11 weeks ago

Hatfield

"Why don't cannibals eat clowns? Because they taste funny."

I’m defo using this one

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By *ddie1966Man 11 weeks ago

Paper Town Central, Essex.

My mate said I must be gay, I said no, I can't be arsed

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By *ddie1966Man 11 weeks ago

Paper Town Central, Essex.

[Removed by poster at 29/04/25 23:17:52]

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By *ddie1966Man 11 weeks ago

Paper Town Central, Essex.

Whilst visiting the gents, I said to the guy next to me "these waterless urinals are just taking the piss now"

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By *r.EdibleMan 11 weeks ago

Fraserburgh

Geordie lady goes to the doctor - Doctor, Me man says me fanny tastes of coconut....

Oh says the doctor, well it's bound ti.

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By *enk15Man 11 weeks ago

Evesham

So the Dalai Lama walks into a pizza shop and says, ‘Can you make me one with everything?’

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By *spenfallsMan 11 weeks ago

Northamptonshire

What have an orange and a parrot got in common?

Neither of them can drive a tractor.

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By *VANDYMan 11 weeks ago

Dawlish

Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman walk into a bar. Barman says, is this a joke?

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By *litterbabeWoman 11 weeks ago

hiding from cock pics

These are great!

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By *penbook1 2 at timesMan 11 weeks ago

Fareham

What do you call bugs bunny with a bent willy??

Fucks funny lol x

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By *carlettsWoman 11 weeks ago

Harpenden

What’s the one thing in life you can actually always count on?

A calculator

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By *carlettsWoman 11 weeks ago

Harpenden

Why did the old man fall into the well?Because he couldn’t see that well

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By *issolvedOrdersMan 11 weeks ago

Bristol

What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?

A carrot

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By *ai Hard 2 - Dai HarderMan 11 weeks ago

Manchester / Cardiff

I accidentally hit a kid with my car the other day, but it wasn't too bad; ...nobody saw.

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By *agic.M OP Man 11 weeks ago

Orpington

Why do gynecologists only treat women?...because they are GUY-NO-cologists

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By *VineMan 11 weeks ago

Just north of Bristol

Towels - the number one cause for dry skin

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By *VineMan 11 weeks ago

Just north of Bristol

I have the world's worst thesaurus.

Not only is it terrible, it's also terrible.

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By *ou345Woman 11 weeks ago

somewhere out there

I only sing when reversing the car.......

I’m a back up singer

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By *enk15Man 11 weeks ago

Evesham

There was a fire in a yodelling school. Everyone had to exit in an orderly orderly orderly queueeeee

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By *enk15Man 11 weeks ago

Evesham

Have you noticed that jokes about white sugar are quite rare? But jokes about brown sugar... demerara.

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By (user no longer on site) 11 weeks ago

What’s the difference between ooh and ahh?

About two inches

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By *ools and the brainCouple 11 weeks ago

couple, us we him her.

Me.

"I've been eating loads of those chickpea ball snack things,I think I've eaten too many"

Mate

" Falafel?"

Me" yeah I feel terrible"

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By *aron Van WinkleMan 11 weeks ago

The Velvet Den of Desire

You know your sex life is getting older when

foreplay is talking about who’s too tired to bother.

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