FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Giving your partner the hall pass.
Giving your partner the hall pass.
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By *hagTonight OP Man 9 weeks ago
From the land of haribos. |
Before I ask the question. I will set the scene. I watched a fun movie called the hall pass with owen wilson, have you also seen it?
I didnt know what they meant with the title of the movie, so I looked it up in the urban dictionary and apparently it about to give your partner a vacation in the relationship to sleep, flirt or have sex with anyone you can with in a specific time period.
In the movie one of the couples the guy, he wasnt so sure about it, he tried the lifestyle but he told the other woman he met that he couldnt have sex with her, she understood and said to him you are a good guy.
That got me thinking, first of all, doesnt this sound like a bit of swinging to you too? I guess this is seen from a vanilla couples view point so abit different, than a swinging couple.
What is your view of it, could you do the same thing and give your partner the hall pass, have you done it, does it cause a lot of jealousy?
I dont have a partner. I think I would do it, it sound like a way to spice up your relationship too 
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Husband here...As we are swingers it obviously goes with the territory. But we are confident enough in our relationship that we can and have both played alone.
Very happy for wife to play alone with whoever she wants, whenever she wants. She's even fucked my vanilla best friend and there was no jealousy at all, It comes down to honesty and communication. We all have urges and desires, so why ignore them when you can encourage them. |
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I watched the film along time ago.
Swinging means different things for everyone depending on the people's dynamics.
Personally i wouldn't class it as swinging but other people probably would.
We don't do separate meets as it does nothing for us sexually so it's definitely not something we would be interested in.  |
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By *hagTonight OP Man 9 weeks ago
From the land of haribos. |
"My partner and I, both have each others full permission to meet alone, if we want to.
He's met couples and women by himself & it's never been an issue for us. Maybe because we met here. "
Hi _issmorgan, that is good you both have each others full permission to meet alone, yes, it could be because you met here too |
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We meet separately as well as together so no need. I know some couples do it but if it's not a regular thing then there must be a reason, and I assume it's a jealousy issue. So why would you have a hall pass if you aren't comfortable with a partner being with someone else???
Seems like a recipe for disaster |
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By *hagTonight OP Man 9 weeks ago
From the land of haribos. |
"Husband here...As we are swingers it obviously goes with the territory. But we are confident enough in our relationship that we can and have both played alone.
Very happy for wife to play alone with whoever she wants, whenever she wants. She's even fucked my vanilla best friend and there was no jealousy at all, It comes down to honesty and communication. We all have urges and desires, so why ignore them when you can encourage them."
Hi _orgetmeknot, yes, you are right there, it goes with the territory, that is good you are happy for the wife to play alone, yes, it comes down to honesty and communication too |
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By *aizyWoman 9 weeks ago
west midlands |
"We meet separately as well as together so no need. I know some couples do it but if it's not a regular thing then there must be a reason, and I assume it's a jealousy issue. So why would you have a hall pass if you aren't comfortable with a partner being with someone else???
Seems like a recipe for disaster"
Yeah this is the same with me and my partner, the whole hall pass thing I've never heard of it till reading this thread. |
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The hall pass to me is for non-swingers to have a one-time run at a singular person rather than a lifestyle of regular swaps.
I'm not a swinger so neither holds any interest for me. If a partner wanted to pursue others I'd not get in their way. They choose, I choose.
Sometimes the best choice is to part ways and you can seek/get what you need and want the most.
We're all free to choose for ourselves 😎 |
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By *hagTonight OP Man 9 weeks ago
From the land of haribos. |
"I watched the film along time ago.
Swinging means different things for everyone depending on the people's dynamics.
Personally i wouldn't class it as swinging but other people probably would.
We don't do separate meets as it does nothing for us sexually so it's definitely not something we would be interested in. "
Hi jandrcpl, that is good you have seen it too, it is very fun lol, yes, you are right there, swinging means different things for everyone, that is also good you dont do separate meets as well |
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By *hagTonight OP Man 9 weeks ago
From the land of haribos. |
"We meet separately as well as together so no need. I know some couples do it but if it's not a regular thing then there must be a reason, and I assume it's a jealousy issue. So why would you have a hall pass if you aren't comfortable with a partner being with someone else???
Seems like a recipe for disaster"
Hi _exyscientists, that is good you meet separately as well as together, yes, you are right there, they wouldnt need a hall pass if you arent comfortable with a partner being with someone else too |
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"Before I ask the question. I will set the scene. I watched a fun movie called the hall pass with owen wilson, have you also seen it?
I didnt know what they meant with the title of the movie, so I looked it up in the urban dictionary and apparently it about to give your partner a vacation in the relationship to sleep, flirt or have sex with anyone you can with in a specific time period.
In the movie one of the couples the guy, he wasnt so sure about it, he tried the lifestyle but he told the other woman he met that he couldnt have sex with her, she understood and said to him you are a good guy.
That got me thinking, first of all, doesnt this sound like a bit of swinging to you too? I guess this is seen from a vanilla couples view point so abit different, than a swinging couple.
What is your view of it, could you do the same thing and give your partner the hall pass, have you done it, does it cause a lot of jealousy?
I dont have a partner. I think I would do it, it sound like a way to spice up your relationship too
"
My situation.... Hubby has given me his consent to find someone extra (I have found someone extra and happy with how it's going)
I do not give my consent for hubby to do anything with anyone
So I guess I have an unlimited hall pass
🎫
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"Before I ask the question. I will set the scene. I watched a fun movie called the hall pass with owen wilson, have you also seen it?
I didnt know what they meant with the title of the movie, so I looked it up in the urban dictionary and apparently it about to give your partner a vacation in the relationship to sleep, flirt or have sex with anyone you can with in a specific time period.
In the movie one of the couples the guy, he wasnt so sure about it, he tried the lifestyle but he told the other woman he met that he couldnt have sex with her, she understood and said to him you are a good guy.
That got me thinking, first of all, doesnt this sound like a bit of swinging to you too? I guess this is seen from a vanilla couples view point so abit different, than a swinging couple.
What is your view of it, could you do the same thing and give your partner the hall pass, have you done it, does it cause a lot of jealousy?
I dont have a partner. I think I would do it, it sound like a way to spice up your relationship too
"
We discuss all things before but the hallpass thing is just a bit of fun and excitement 😈 |
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It essentially sounds like a time-limited CNM situation. Never having seen the film in question, I cannot comment on whether it went in to detail about the ethics, rules and boundaries of such arrangements. There are several books out there which do cover all aspects of ENM/CNM.
.
Mrs DS and I are CNM/ENM. I wouldn't say "Poly" as such. But with the self-autonomy to make decisions about our needs and desires as we see fit.
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By *hagTonight OP Man 9 weeks ago
From the land of haribos. |
"Before I ask the question. I will set the scene. I watched a fun movie called the hall pass with owen wilson, have you also seen it?
I didnt know what they meant with the title of the movie, so I looked it up in the urban dictionary and apparently it about to give your partner a vacation in the relationship to sleep, flirt or have sex with anyone you can with in a specific time period.
In the movie one of the couples the guy, he wasnt so sure about it, he tried the lifestyle but he told the other woman he met that he couldnt have sex with her, she understood and said to him you are a good guy.
That got me thinking, first of all, doesnt this sound like a bit of swinging to you too? I guess this is seen from a vanilla couples view point so abit different, than a swinging couple.
What is your view of it, could you do the same thing and give your partner the hall pass, have you done it, does it cause a lot of jealousy?
I dont have a partner. I think I would do it, it sound like a way to spice up your relationship too
My situation.... Hubby has given me his consent to find someone extra (I have found someone extra and happy with how it's going)
I do not give my consent for hubby to do anything with anyone
So I guess I have an unlimited hall pass
🎫
"
Hi nandt, that is good your hubby have given you his consent to find someone extra, that is good you have found one and are happy how it is going, do you also tell him what you are doing with them? Yes, you do have an unlimited hall pass too |
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I take citalopram and it often effects my sex drive, when I was really low (we had already been on here for years) I told Sean he had my blessing to meet and sleet with other women because despise my being low, I still recognised his needs and wants.
He chose to not meet anyone but I honestly wouldn’t have blamed him if he did
Donna |
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Swinging is a label, lots of people who are not in the swinging scene have sexually none monogamous sex in their relationships. It's fairly common amongst younger people who wouldn't label them self's swingers and engage in different circles and Internet sites/apps.
I think the key thing about sexual non-monogamy in a relationship is freedom. Being able to unapologetically be you and chase your desires without judgment from eachother or risk. Obviously people have different boundaries which you discuss and set (which are different for everyone). But it's accepting that we desire different sexual experiences and that we can have them with the trust and security in a relationship and each other that this is no threat. And that is both a beautiful freedom and security to have in a relationship. A cornerstone of strength IMO. When you love someone and have that security you want them to be able to experience and enjoy all life has to offer. Obviously it's a bonus if that's also something you both find really hot. But the main thing is you're both doing it for the right reasons and you have the core love, trust and communication in your relationship first as a foundation. And of course if the motives are wrong and/or you lack those foundations it'll quickly expose weaknesses and end a relationship.
Mr |
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I think the bias on a swinging website for a question like this would be off the charts.
I think for those with a monogamous mindset, it's usually a bad idea.
As it stands I'm happy for my partners to fuck and develop new connections with other people. They're whole humans and I enjoy knowing they're happy.
In monogamous relationships around me where a hall pass has been offered it's generally lead to a relationship implosion 💜 |
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Hannah is free to see any woman she wants and I wouldn't be involved at all. It's unlikely to happen though because she doesn't feel comfortable making the first move.
There are a small number of trusted people she would be OK with me seeing on my own if she's working abroad as often happens.
Other than that, we only meet together.
Luke |
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By *hagTonight OP Man 9 weeks ago
From the land of haribos. |
"Whatever relational boundaries we mutually agree as partners I keep to.
It's not really about a pass or permission, it's about trust and respect for each other."
Yes, it is also about trust and respect too  |
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By *hagTonight OP Man 9 weeks ago
From the land of haribos. |
"I have a permanent hall pass which I tend to use if I get chatted up on nights out.
It's good fun! 😁"
Hi mrsspicy, that is good you have a permanent hall pass and how you use it if you get chatted up on nights out too |
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