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Weird excuses for not having sex?

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I'm curious, what is the weirdest excuse you have been given to NOT have sex? Mine was- Not tonight because it makes me too awake, so I can't sleep afterwards.

Yes I'm married

Yes it was my husband who said it

shame....lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Not tonight I cant be arsed to change the bed covers

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By *eliz NelsonMan over a year ago

The Tantric Tea Shop

Your husband saw the bulge in my dress, 'crotch area' and texted me i.e. 'you lying b....rd.

Hence my excuse...

'I have two days to live and local club has promised to strap me to the Glory Hole, with every blowjob resulting in £40 going to a local charity'

My apologies, I am sure we would have had a fab time

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By *anejohnkent6263Couple over a year ago

canterbury

britex...as we seem to blame everything on it nowdays

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Not sure I've ever been turned down!

Ruby

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By *harpDressed ManMan over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"britex...as we seem to blame everything on it nowdays"

Seatbelts getting the blame is a new one...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Poor excuse from my wife last night, something about 4000 miles and 8 hour time zone difference... I remember the days she would crawl over broken glass just for a kiss