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Non Political Prime Minister ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

I know this can't happen , but for a bit of fun

If it could what NON Politicician do you think would make a good Ptime Minister of our Country and Why ?

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By *LCCCouple  over a year ago

Cambridge

Jesus

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

David Attenborough. He'd be like everyone's grandfather. I don't think he could possibly have a bad bone in his body.

War breaks out, he's speeches would sooth your worries away.

Understands the human desire to improve things for ourselves, but understands the need to work with, not exploit the natural world.

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By *LCCCouple  over a year ago

Cambridge


"David Attenborough. He'd be like everyone's grandfather. I don't think he could possibly have a bad bone in his body.

War breaks out, he's speeches would sooth your worries away.

Understands the human desire to improve things for ourselves, but understands the need to work with, not exploit the natural world."

AND he wants to shoot Trump!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"David Attenborough. He'd be like everyone's grandfather. I don't think he could possibly have a bad bone in his body.

War breaks out, he's speeches would sooth your worries away.

Understands the human desire to improve things for ourselves, but understands the need to work with, not exploit the natural world.

AND he wants to shoot Trump! "

Wish you wernt so angry

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"David Attenborough. He'd be like everyone's grandfather. I don't think he could possibly have a bad bone in his body.

War breaks out, he's speeches would sooth your worries away.

Understands the human desire to improve things for ourselves, but understands the need to work with, not exploit the natural world.

AND he wants to shoot Trump! "

I believe in context it was meant to be a joke. Just like Trump's 'second amendment' joke inthe election.

Tbh given the republican's Trump is likely to give positions to, Attenborough will mostly get frustrated at America's environmental policies. :P Tad too far to shoot trump though.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I stand firm, Attenborough would probably be like the grandfather of the nation :P Most likely just wanting to do the most good possible.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Kathy Burke as Linda in Gimme Gimme Gimme!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Somebody... anybody who understands science ffs

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Somebody... anybody who understands science ffs"

Me!

Or Brian Cox...Richard Dawkins mightbe a bit hardline...Attenborough.

If they were all in a political party I'd probs vote for them.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Somebody... anybody who understands science ffs

Me!

Or Brian Cox...Richard Dawkins mightbe a bit hardline...Attenborough.

If they were all in a political party I'd probs vote for them."

.

We'd all vote for them!..... That's why nobody in science ever runs in politics.

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By *LCCCouple  over a year ago

Cambridge

But wouldn't they be considered as experts? We know how people feel about them.

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By *obka3Couple  over a year ago

bournemouth


"But wouldn't they be considered as experts? We know how people feel about them. "

Ah would that be the financial experts that predicted the crash that you named,oh of course you still havent done that have you

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Jeremy Clarkson for Prime Minister

.

there are already 28000 signatures on the petition for this, so fellow fabbers, please please feel free to sign this petition.

.

all the more reason to sign, here are what some would consider reasons to vote for him

.

1 ENCOURAGE GLOBAL WARMING

Britons will be encouraged, through discounts and tax relief, to drive 4x4s, Jaguars and BMWs. Not only will this give a valuable boost to our oil industry, but it will encourage climate change. And what's not to like about global warming? Holland gets flooded and we get California's weather. That's what I call a win/win situation.

.

2 ABOLISH CRICKET

How can we take seriously a sport that stops for afternoon tea and whose followers wear striped blazers and bray like horses? Let's face it, we have been rubbish at cricket for years, so we should put an end to the endless cycle of misery in summer. My Government will bring back proper sports, such as jousting and bear-baiting.

.

3 END THE SPECIAL RELATIONSHIP

*****This will be reconsidered now that Trump is in office*******

The only thing special about our link with the U.S. is the amount of grovelling we do. My Government will stop acting as if Britain is the 51st state of the union. The last time I went across the Atlantic, I found people so stupid I'm convinced their nearest living relative must be a gherkin. They're the sort of people who can't read a road sign without moving their lips. Plus their cars are about as sexy as Ann Widdecombe's armpit.

.

4 BAN HEALTH & SAFETY

The safety bureaucrats are the abominable no-men, constantly dreaming up new reasons to abolish fun and hobble business. With their silly regulations, they have done more damage to British industry than the Luftwaffe. They are the human equivalent of a Lada. But at least you could drive a Lada off a cliff.

.

5 DEAL WITH YOUTH CRIME

It's true that some juvenile oiks come from broken homes where parents have all the child-rearing skills of King Herod. But let's stop making excuses. These delinquents have been creating mayhem for too long. They need to be taught some fear. Looking down the barrel of a sub-machine gun in a prison camp on the Outer Hebrides might do the trick.

.

6 REMOVE SPEED CAMERAS

****************************

Thanks to mass immigration, urban traffic moves at the speed of an arthritic snail. But still motorists are bullied by the rash of speed cameras, which are nothing more than a revenue-raising device. Serious criminals do not have to put up with this level of surveillance. My Government will tear down cameras and raise the motorway speed limit to 150mph.

***************************

.

7 TEACH BRITISH HISTORY

Pupils are taught to feel ashamed of their past, our national flag is treated as an embarrassment, our heritage as a source of shame. My Government would end this cultural cringe. The only problem with the Empire is that it wasn't big enough and didn't last long enough.

.

8 GET OUT OF IRAQ

Our involvement in Iraq has been the most misguided foreign adventure since Napoleon said: "I hear Moscow's nice at this time of year." As Prime Minister, I will bring back every British soldier and let the Iraqis get on with the national pastime of killing each other. And I'll put His Tonyness on trial for crimes against humanity and the Armed Services.

.

9 BRING BACK THE STOCKS

Despite Big Brother, there isn't enough humiliation in public life for those who deserve it. The medieval authorities had the right idea. The Beckhams will be the first in the stocks, followed by the chairman of the Health & Safety Executive.

.

10 END RECYCLING HELL

Putting out the rubbish used to be a simple task. Thanks to the tyrants of green officialdom, it has been turned into a nightmare. Placing the wrong garbage in the wrong bin is regarded as worse than mugging a granny. My Government will restore sanity by providing everyone with a bin the size of Bernard Manning, which will be emptied twice a week.

.

11 BANISHWALES

In my new-look Britain, Wales will be forced to go independent. Any country that has produced Neil Kinnock, Max Boyce and Charlotte Church does not deserve to remain in the UK.

.

12 AND EAST ANGLIA

That boring lump of flatness stretching out into the North Sea will have no place in Clarkson's Britain either. Then all those tiresome luvvies with second homes in Norfolk and Suffolk can have the thrill of going to a foreign country without flying to Tuscany.

.

13 BAN DIESEL CARS (Apart from Toyota Hilux)

A diesel has all the excitement of a vegan dinner party. It might be good for you, but so is cod liver oil. The same goes for lowemission cars such as the Toyota Prius. Feeling self-righteous as you tootle around at 10mph may earn you Brownie points with the knit-your-own-lentil brigade, but to the rest of the world, you look like a sanctimonious idiot.

.

14 END HUMAN RIGHTS

Under my Government, the rights of ordinary British citizens will have a higher priority than those of Islamic terrorists, Somalian gang-leaders and knife-wielding thugs. Homosexual pornography for deranged serial killers will not be regarded as a human right, nor will multi-million pound fees for hypocritical Leftwing lawyers milking the system.

.

15 KICK OUT BUREAUCRATS

The former U.S. President Ronald Reagan once said that the state was like a baby's alimentary canal: endless appetite at one end and utter irresponsibility at the other. My Government will reduce taxes by cracking down on all pen-sucking, paper-pushing jobsworths, outreach counsellors and parking enforcers, equality officers and drugs co-ordinators. Those who resist will be fed very, very slowly into their own office shredders.

.

16 FREEDOM TO SMOKE

In my Britain, smoking will no longer be seen as a crime against humanity. In fact, cigarettes will be encouraged in order to reduce the burden on the NHS and state pensions. After all, smokers perform a valuable public services by paying extortionate taxation, then generally failing to reach old age. The Marlboro Man has done more for our economy than any Chancellor.

.

17 BRITISH INDEPENDENCE

We fought the last war for our independence, and now we're under the heel of the unelected eurocrats of Brussels. Under my rule, Britain will withdraw from the EU, so we will no longer be governed by a bunch of sausage-eating Germans, French cheese-eating surrender monkeys and kebab-swallowing Greeks.

.

18 NO MORE COOL BRITANNIA

Cool is just a fancy word for pretentious or unpopular. The Clarkson Downing Street will not be interested in appearing "cool". Instead, my team will be encouraged to listen to Seventies rock music and wear figure-hugging blue jeans, no matter what their age.

.

19 CRACKDOWN ON CYCLISTS

Cycling is just as dreary as recycling and twice as pointless. My Government will come down heavily on this sanctimonious activity by introducing new taxes on Lycra, plastic helmets and the bicycles themselves. Altogether now: "Four wheels good, two wheels bad."

.

20 PUBLIC EXECUTIONS

Only those without any romantic sense of the richness of British history could pretend not to miss the public hangings at Newgate. The restoration of judicial killings before a cheering crowd would not only bring back some muchneeded colour to British life, but would also give the doomed prisoner the satisfaction of a brief burst of celebrity

.

MY CABINET

CHANCELLOR: Ken Dodd - very sound on taxation.

MINISTER OF TRANSPORT: Richard Hammond - a man with the right sense of priorities when it comes to modes of travel.

HOME SECRETARY: Henry Cooper - a knockout for criminals.

CABINET SECRETARY: Heidi Klum - no Cabinet meeting would ever be boring with the presence of the supermodel.

MINISTER FOR FOOD & DRINK: Keith Floyd - no more puritan lectures about alcohol units.

FOREIGN SECRETARY: Boris Johnson - diplomacy is his middle name

You can also support Clarkson for PM on facebook or again sign his online petition

.

come on fabbers, you know you want too, whats your favourite points on his manifesto???

.

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By *entaur_UKMan  over a year ago

Cannock

Watched Press preview on sky news last night and it appears Aaron Banks the millionaire Ukip donor will run a campaign at the next general election where he is going to put ordinary people with ordinary jobs up for election in around 200 constituency seats against the career politicians. These arrogant distant career politicians had better watch out the people are coming for you.

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple  over a year ago

in Lancashire


"Watched Press preview on sky news last night and it appears Aaron Banks the millionaire Ukip donor will run a campaign at the next general election where he is going to put ordinary people with ordinary jobs up for election in around 200 constituency seats against the career politicians. These arrogant distant career politicians had better watch out the people are coming for you. "

I get the general reasoning behind the idea however a multi millionaire funding these 'ordinary people' is no different than someone chosen off the main parties short lists they have..

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By *LCCCouple  over a year ago

Cambridge


"But wouldn't they be considered as experts? We know how people feel about them.

Ah would that be the financial experts that predicted the crash that you named,oh of course you still havent done that have you "

I have. I don't know why you are so enthralled by my contributions to the forum that missing one of my posts throws you into such a state of dispair.

I also don't know why keep on about the economic experts that you ignored, forgetting of course the experts in higher education that you ignored, the experts in science that you ignored, the business experts that you ignored, the experts in defence that you ignored, the experts in the environment that you ignored, he experts in security that you ignored etc etc etc.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Martin Clunes

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Martin Clunes

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By *LCCCouple  over a year ago

Cambridge


"Watched Press preview on sky news last night and it appears Aaron Banks the millionaire Ukip donor will run a campaign at the next general election where he is going to put ordinary people with ordinary jobs up for election in around 200 constituency seats against the career politicians. These arrogant distant career politicians had better watch out the people are coming for you. "

My local MP is new to this parliament, before that she was educated as a scientist and ran the family business. Is she the kind of person that he wants to replace?

Or what about me, I'm not a politician, I'm an ordinary guy with an ordinary background and an ordinary job, would you want me as your MP?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Jeremy Clarkson for Prime Minister

.

there are already 28000 signatures on the petition for this, so fellow fabbers, please please feel free to sign this petition.

.

all the more reason to sign, here are what some would consider reasons to vote for him

.

1 ENCOURAGE GLOBAL WARMING

Britons will be encouraged, through discounts and tax relief, to drive 4x4s, Jaguars and BMWs. Not only will this give a valuable boost to our oil industry, but it will encourage climate change. And what's not to like about global warming? Holland gets flooded and we get California's weather. That's what I call a win/win situation.

.

2 ABOLISH CRICKET

How can we take seriously a sport that stops for afternoon tea and whose followers wear striped blazers and bray like horses? Let's face it, we have been rubbish at cricket for years, so we should put an end to the endless cycle of misery in summer. My Government will bring back proper sports, such as jousting and bear-baiting.

.

3 END THE SPECIAL RELATIONSHIP

*****This will be reconsidered now that Trump is in office*******

The only thing special about our link with the U.S. is the amount of grovelling we do. My Government will stop acting as if Britain is the 51st state of the union. The last time I went across the Atlantic, I found people so stupid I'm convinced their nearest living relative must be a gherkin. They're the sort of people who can't read a road sign without moving their lips. Plus their cars are about as sexy as Ann Widdecombe's armpit.

.

4 BAN HEALTH & SAFETY

The safety bureaucrats are the abominable no-men, constantly dreaming up new reasons to abolish fun and hobble business. With their silly regulations, they have done more damage to British industry than the Luftwaffe. They are the human equivalent of a Lada. But at least you could drive a Lada off a cliff.

.

5 DEAL WITH YOUTH CRIME

It's true that some juvenile oiks come from broken homes where parents have all the child-rearing skills of King Herod. But let's stop making excuses. These delinquents have been creating mayhem for too long. They need to be taught some fear. Looking down the barrel of a sub-machine gun in a prison camp on the Outer Hebrides might do the trick.

.

6 REMOVE SPEED CAMERAS

****************************

Thanks to mass immigration, urban traffic moves at the speed of an arthritic snail. But still motorists are bullied by the rash of speed cameras, which are nothing more than a revenue-raising device. Serious criminals do not have to put up with this level of surveillance. My Government will tear down cameras and raise the motorway speed limit to 150mph.

***************************

.

7 TEACH BRITISH HISTORY

Pupils are taught to feel ashamed of their past, our national flag is treated as an embarrassment, our heritage as a source of shame. My Government would end this cultural cringe. The only problem with the Empire is that it wasn't big enough and didn't last long enough.

.

8 GET OUT OF IRAQ

Our involvement in Iraq has been the most misguided foreign adventure since Napoleon said: "I hear Moscow's nice at this time of year." As Prime Minister, I will bring back every British soldier and let the Iraqis get on with the national pastime of killing each other. And I'll put His Tonyness on trial for crimes against humanity and the Armed Services.

.

9 BRING BACK THE STOCKS

Despite Big Brother, there isn't enough humiliation in public life for those who deserve it. The medieval authorities had the right idea. The Beckhams will be the first in the stocks, followed by the chairman of the Health & Safety Executive.

.

10 END RECYCLING HELL

Putting out the rubbish used to be a simple task. Thanks to the tyrants of green officialdom, it has been turned into a nightmare. Placing the wrong garbage in the wrong bin is regarded as worse than mugging a granny. My Government will restore sanity by providing everyone with a bin the size of Bernard Manning, which will be emptied twice a week.

.

11 BANISHWALES

In my new-look Britain, Wales will be forced to go independent. Any country that has produced Neil Kinnock, Max Boyce and Charlotte Church does not deserve to remain in the UK.

.

12 AND EAST ANGLIA

That boring lump of flatness stretching out into the North Sea will have no place in Clarkson's Britain either. Then all those tiresome luvvies with second homes in Norfolk and Suffolk can have the thrill of going to a foreign country without flying to Tuscany.

.

13 BAN DIESEL CARS (Apart from Toyota Hilux)

A diesel has all the excitement of a vegan dinner party. It might be good for you, but so is cod liver oil. The same goes for lowemission cars such as the Toyota Prius. Feeling self-righteous as you tootle around at 10mph may earn you Brownie points with the knit-your-own-lentil brigade, but to the rest of the world, you look like a sanctimonious idiot.

.

14 END HUMAN RIGHTS

Under my Government, the rights of ordinary British citizens will have a higher priority than those of Islamic terrorists, Somalian gang-leaders and knife-wielding thugs. Homosexual pornography for deranged serial killers will not be regarded as a human right, nor will multi-million pound fees for hypocritical Leftwing lawyers milking the system.

.

15 KICK OUT BUREAUCRATS

The former U.S. President Ronald Reagan once said that the state was like a baby's alimentary canal: endless appetite at one end and utter irresponsibility at the other. My Government will reduce taxes by cracking down on all pen-sucking, paper-pushing jobsworths, outreach counsellors and parking enforcers, equality officers and drugs co-ordinators. Those who resist will be fed very, very slowly into their own office shredders.

.

16 FREEDOM TO SMOKE

In my Britain, smoking will no longer be seen as a crime against humanity. In fact, cigarettes will be encouraged in order to reduce the burden on the NHS and state pensions. After all, smokers perform a valuable public services by paying extortionate taxation, then generally failing to reach old age. The Marlboro Man has done more for our economy than any Chancellor.

.

17 BRITISH INDEPENDENCE

We fought the last war for our independence, and now we're under the heel of the unelected eurocrats of Brussels. Under my rule, Britain will withdraw from the EU, so we will no longer be governed by a bunch of sausage-eating Germans, French cheese-eating surrender monkeys and kebab-swallowing Greeks.

.

18 NO MORE COOL BRITANNIA

Cool is just a fancy word for pretentious or unpopular. The Clarkson Downing Street will not be interested in appearing "cool". Instead, my team will be encouraged to listen to Seventies rock music and wear figure-hugging blue jeans, no matter what their age.

.

19 CRACKDOWN ON CYCLISTS

Cycling is just as dreary as recycling and twice as pointless. My Government will come down heavily on this sanctimonious activity by introducing new taxes on Lycra, plastic helmets and the bicycles themselves. Altogether now: "Four wheels good, two wheels bad."

.

20 PUBLIC EXECUTIONS

Only those without any romantic sense of the richness of British history could pretend not to miss the public hangings at Newgate. The restoration of judicial killings before a cheering crowd would not only bring back some muchneeded colour to British life, but would also give the doomed prisoner the satisfaction of a brief burst of celebrity

.

MY CABINET

CHANCELLOR: Ken Dodd - very sound on taxation.

MINISTER OF TRANSPORT: Richard Hammond - a man with the right sense of priorities when it comes to modes of travel.

HOME SECRETARY: Henry Cooper - a knockout for criminals.

CABINET SECRETARY: Heidi Klum - no Cabinet meeting would ever be boring with the presence of the supermodel.

MINISTER FOR FOOD & DRINK: Keith Floyd - no more puritan lectures about alcohol units.

FOREIGN SECRETARY: Boris Johnson - diplomacy is his middle name

You can also support Clarkson for PM on facebook or again sign his online petition

.

come on fabbers, you know you want too, whats your favourite points on his manifesto???

.

"

I second Jezza, but think our Enery has been dead for about 4 or 5 years now, so sadly can't be a part of his cabinet.

Not only is Jezza non political he is non PC.

Would get my vote, and I'm not even saying that tongue in cheek.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Watched Press preview on sky news last night and it appears Aaron Banks the millionaire Ukip donor will run a campaign at the next general election where he is going to put ordinary people with ordinary jobs up for election in around 200 constituency seats against the career politicians. These arrogant distant career politicians had better watch out the people are coming for you.

I get the general reasoning behind the idea however a multi millionaire funding these 'ordinary people' is no different than someone chosen off the main parties short lists they have..

"

Agreed, the money would be better spent positioning 'ordinary people' to go into the main parties or to give them some training about how british law and how the councils can be used more effectively. Banks seems to have a different idea of normal people in some cases, to the rest of us. The risk with a millionaire bankroller is that then his ordinary people will most likely have a vested interest to support his policies. Just like the major parties of the right and left have. What im saying is, what happens if ukip just ends up look like the establishment more just with one bank roller.

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By *entaur_UKMan  over a year ago

Cannock


"Watched Press preview on sky news last night and it appears Aaron Banks the millionaire Ukip donor will run a campaign at the next general election where he is going to put ordinary people with ordinary jobs up for election in around 200 constituency seats against the career politicians. These arrogant distant career politicians had better watch out the people are coming for you.

My local MP is new to this parliament, before that she was educated as a scientist and ran the family business. Is she the kind of person that he wants to replace?

Or what about me, I'm not a politician, I'm an ordinary guy with an ordinary background and an ordinary job, would you want me as your MP? "

No the career politicians that will be targeted are the likes of Ed Miliband, Nick Clegg and George Osborne who have never had a proper job outside of politics.

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By *LCCCouple  over a year ago

Cambridge


"Watched Press preview on sky news last night and it appears Aaron Banks the millionaire Ukip donor will run a campaign at the next general election where he is going to put ordinary people with ordinary jobs up for election in around 200 constituency seats against the career politicians. These arrogant distant career politicians had better watch out the people are coming for you.

My local MP is new to this parliament, before that she was educated as a scientist and ran the family business. Is she the kind of person that he wants to replace?

Or what about me, I'm not a politician, I'm an ordinary guy with an ordinary background and an ordinary job, would you want me as your MP?

No the career politicians that will be targeted are the likes of Ed Miliband, Nick Clegg and George Osborne who have never had a proper job outside of politics. "

What about May, or Boris, or David Davis then? Should we get rid of them too? How about Farage, not an MP, but certainly a career politician isn't he?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

David Davis I know was born on a council estate got a degree and worked for Tate and Lyle!....I don't think that qualifies him as an expert in politics but definitely not as a career politican

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By *LCCCouple  over a year ago

Cambridge


"David Davis I know was born on a council estate got a degree and worked for Tate and Lyle!....I don't think that qualifies him as an expert in politics but definitely not as a career politican

"

He has been an MP for 29 years. I would say that 29 years qualifies as quite a career.

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By *unandbuckCouple  over a year ago

Sheffield

I would ban anyone from high office who hasn't had significant experience outside of politics.

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By *LCCCouple  over a year ago

Cambridge


"I would ban anyone from high office who hasn't had significant experience outside of politics."

What about banning people from high office who haven't had any experience inside politics?

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By *unandbuckCouple  over a year ago

Sheffield


"I would ban anyone from high office who hasn't had significant experience outside of politics.

What about banning people from high office who haven't had any experience inside politics? "

I would be more accepting if it that way round. I.e someone who has well managed an organisation could be well placed to do a high level govt job as a technocrat.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"David Davis I know was born on a council estate got a degree and worked for Tate and Lyle!....I don't think that qualifies him as an expert in politics but definitely not as a career politican

He has been an MP for 29 years. I would say that 29 years qualifies as quite a career.

"

.

I've gut a childhood friend who's been bus driving for about that length of time but he didn't set out to do that....

A "career" politican is what would be described as a ppe at uni and straight into politics from their.... Like balls and copper or Cameron and Osborne.... Actually come to think of it I think they were all at Oxford together

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By *LCCCouple  over a year ago

Cambridge


"David Davis I know was born on a council estate got a degree and worked for Tate and Lyle!....I don't think that qualifies him as an expert in politics but definitely not as a career politican

He has been an MP for 29 years. I would say that 29 years qualifies as quite a career.

.

I've gut a childhood friend who's been bus driving for about that length of time but he didn't set out to do that....

A "career" politican is what would be described as a ppe at uni and straight into politics from their.... Like balls and copper or Cameron and Osborne.... Actually come to think of it I think they were all at Oxford together "

I think we will have to just have to agree to disagree about the meaning of a career politician then if you dont think that 29 years counts as a career.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"David Davis I know was born on a council estate got a degree and worked for Tate and Lyle!....I don't think that qualifies him as an expert in politics but definitely not as a career politican

He has been an MP for 29 years. I would say that 29 years qualifies as quite a career.

.

I've gut a childhood friend who's been bus driving for about that length of time but he didn't set out to do that....

A "career" politican is what would be described as a ppe at uni and straight into politics from their.... Like balls and copper or Cameron and Osborne.... Actually come to think of it I think they were all at Oxford together

I think we will have to just have to agree to disagree about the meaning of a career politician then if you dont think that 29 years counts as a career. "

.

No I know it's a career that's what I just said....I was saying people define "career politican" by what i wrote about intending to go into politics from the get go

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Jeremy Clarkson for Prime Minister

.

there are already 28000 signatures on the petition for this, so fellow fabbers, please please feel free to sign this petition.

.

all the more reason to sign, here are what some would consider reasons to vote for him

.

1 ENCOURAGE GLOBAL WARMING

Britons will be encouraged, through discounts and tax relief, to drive 4x4s, Jaguars and BMWs. Not only will this give a valuable boost to our oil industry, but it will encourage climate change. And what's not to like about global warming? Holland gets flooded and we get California's weather. That's what I call a win/win situation.

.

2 ABOLISH CRICKET

How can we take seriously a sport that stops for afternoon tea and whose followers wear striped blazers and bray like horses? Let's face it, we have been rubbish at cricket for years, so we should put an end to the endless cycle of misery in summer. My Government will bring back proper sports, such as jousting and bear-baiting.

.

3 END THE SPECIAL RELATIONSHIP

*****This will be reconsidered now that Trump is in office*******

The only thing special about our link with the U.S. is the amount of grovelling we do. My Government will stop acting as if Britain is the 51st state of the union. The last time I went across the Atlantic, I found people so stupid I'm convinced their nearest living relative must be a gherkin. They're the sort of people who can't read a road sign without moving their lips. Plus their cars are about as sexy as Ann Widdecombe's armpit.

.

4 BAN HEALTH & SAFETY

The safety bureaucrats are the abominable no-men, constantly dreaming up new reasons to abolish fun and hobble business. With their silly regulations, they have done more damage to British industry than the Luftwaffe. They are the human equivalent of a Lada. But at least you could drive a Lada off a cliff.

.

5 DEAL WITH YOUTH CRIME

It's true that some juvenile oiks come from broken homes where parents have all the child-rearing skills of King Herod. But let's stop making excuses. These delinquents have been creating mayhem for too long. They need to be taught some fear. Looking down the barrel of a sub-machine gun in a prison camp on the Outer Hebrides might do the trick.

.

6 REMOVE SPEED CAMERAS

****************************

Thanks to mass immigration, urban traffic moves at the speed of an arthritic snail. But still motorists are bullied by the rash of speed cameras, which are nothing more than a revenue-raising device. Serious criminals do not have to put up with this level of surveillance. My Government will tear down cameras and raise the motorway speed limit to 150mph.

***************************

.

7 TEACH BRITISH HISTORY

Pupils are taught to feel ashamed of their past, our national flag is treated as an embarrassment, our heritage as a source of shame. My Government would end this cultural cringe. The only problem with the Empire is that it wasn't big enough and didn't last long enough.

.

8 GET OUT OF IRAQ

Our involvement in Iraq has been the most misguided foreign adventure since Napoleon said: "I hear Moscow's nice at this time of year." As Prime Minister, I will bring back every British soldier and let the Iraqis get on with the national pastime of killing each other. And I'll put His Tonyness on trial for crimes against humanity and the Armed Services.

.

9 BRING BACK THE STOCKS

Despite Big Brother, there isn't enough humiliation in public life for those who deserve it. The medieval authorities had the right idea. The Beckhams will be the first in the stocks, followed by the chairman of the Health & Safety Executive.

.

10 END RECYCLING HELL

Putting out the rubbish used to be a simple task. Thanks to the tyrants of green officialdom, it has been turned into a nightmare. Placing the wrong garbage in the wrong bin is regarded as worse than mugging a granny. My Government will restore sanity by providing everyone with a bin the size of Bernard Manning, which will be emptied twice a week.

.

11 BANISHWALES

In my new-look Britain, Wales will be forced to go independent. Any country that has produced Neil Kinnock, Max Boyce and Charlotte Church does not deserve to remain in the UK.

.

12 AND EAST ANGLIA

That boring lump of flatness stretching out into the North Sea will have no place in Clarkson's Britain either. Then all those tiresome luvvies with second homes in Norfolk and Suffolk can have the thrill of going to a foreign country without flying to Tuscany.

.

13 BAN DIESEL CARS (Apart from Toyota Hilux)

A diesel has all the excitement of a vegan dinner party. It might be good for you, but so is cod liver oil. The same goes for lowemission cars such as the Toyota Prius. Feeling self-righteous as you tootle around at 10mph may earn you Brownie points with the knit-your-own-lentil brigade, but to the rest of the world, you look like a sanctimonious idiot.

.

14 END HUMAN RIGHTS

Under my Government, the rights of ordinary British citizens will have a higher priority than those of Islamic terrorists, Somalian gang-leaders and knife-wielding thugs. Homosexual pornography for deranged serial killers will not be regarded as a human right, nor will multi-million pound fees for hypocritical Leftwing lawyers milking the system.

.

15 KICK OUT BUREAUCRATS

The former U.S. President Ronald Reagan once said that the state was like a baby's alimentary canal: endless appetite at one end and utter irresponsibility at the other. My Government will reduce taxes by cracking down on all pen-sucking, paper-pushing jobsworths, outreach counsellors and parking enforcers, equality officers and drugs co-ordinators. Those who resist will be fed very, very slowly into their own office shredders.

.

16 FREEDOM TO SMOKE

In my Britain, smoking will no longer be seen as a crime against humanity. In fact, cigarettes will be encouraged in order to reduce the burden on the NHS and state pensions. After all, smokers perform a valuable public services by paying extortionate taxation, then generally failing to reach old age. The Marlboro Man has done more for our economy than any Chancellor.

.

17 BRITISH INDEPENDENCE

We fought the last war for our independence, and now we're under the heel of the unelected eurocrats of Brussels. Under my rule, Britain will withdraw from the EU, so we will no longer be governed by a bunch of sausage-eating Germans, French cheese-eating surrender monkeys and kebab-swallowing Greeks.

.

18 NO MORE COOL BRITANNIA

Cool is just a fancy word for pretentious or unpopular. The Clarkson Downing Street will not be interested in appearing "cool". Instead, my team will be encouraged to listen to Seventies rock music and wear figure-hugging blue jeans, no matter what their age.

.

19 CRACKDOWN ON CYCLISTS

Cycling is just as dreary as recycling and twice as pointless. My Government will come down heavily on this sanctimonious activity by introducing new taxes on Lycra, plastic helmets and the bicycles themselves. Altogether now: "Four wheels good, two wheels bad."

.

20 PUBLIC EXECUTIONS

Only those without any romantic sense of the richness of British history could pretend not to miss the public hangings at Newgate. The restoration of judicial killings before a cheering crowd would not only bring back some muchneeded colour to British life, but would also give the doomed prisoner the satisfaction of a brief burst of celebrity

.

MY CABINET

CHANCELLOR: Ken Dodd - very sound on taxation.

MINISTER OF TRANSPORT: Richard Hammond - a man with the right sense of priorities when it comes to modes of travel.

HOME SECRETARY: Henry Cooper - a knockout for criminals.

CABINET SECRETARY: Heidi Klum - no Cabinet meeting would ever be boring with the presence of the supermodel.

MINISTER FOR FOOD & DRINK: Keith Floyd - no more puritan lectures about alcohol units.

FOREIGN SECRETARY: Boris Johnson - diplomacy is his middle name

You can also support Clarkson for PM on facebook or again sign his online petition

.

come on fabbers, you know you want too, whats your favourite points on his manifesto???

.

I second Jezza, but think our Enery has been dead for about 4 or 5 years now, so sadly can't be a part of his cabinet.

Not only is Jezza non political he is non PC.

Would get my vote, and I'm not even saying that tongue in cheek."

But surely someone who is "dead" will do a much better job than most MP's and PM right now!!!!!!!!

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By *entaur_UKMan  over a year ago

Cannock


"Watched Press preview on sky news last night and it appears Aaron Banks the millionaire Ukip donor will run a campaign at the next general election where he is going to put ordinary people with ordinary jobs up for election in around 200 constituency seats against the career politicians. These arrogant distant career politicians had better watch out the people are coming for you.

My local MP is new to this parliament, before that she was educated as a scientist and ran the family business. Is she the kind of person that he wants to replace?

Or what about me, I'm not a politician, I'm an ordinary guy with an ordinary background and an ordinary job, would you want me as your MP?

No the career politicians that will be targeted are the likes of Ed Miliband, Nick Clegg and George Osborne who have never had a proper job outside of politics.

What about May, or Boris, or David Davis then? Should we get rid of them too? How about Farage, not an MP, but certainly a career politician isn't he? "

Theresa May could be fair game as I'm not aware that she has had a job outside of politics.

Boris Johnson has had a job outside of politics as a newspaper columnist. David Davis had a job outside of politics at Tate and Lyle as explained in a post earlier by The doors. Nigel Farage had a job outside of politics as a trader in London.

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By *entaur_UKMan  over a year ago

Cannock


"David Davis I know was born on a council estate got a degree and worked for Tate and Lyle!....I don't think that qualifies him as an expert in politics but definitely not as a career politican

He has been an MP for 29 years. I would say that 29 years qualifies as quite a career.

.

I've gut a childhood friend who's been bus driving for about that length of time but he didn't set out to do that....

A "career" politican is what would be described as a ppe at uni and straight into politics from their.... Like balls and copper or Cameron and Osborne.... Actually come to think of it I think they were all at Oxford together

I think we will have to just have to agree to disagree about the meaning of a career politician then if you dont think that 29 years counts as a career. .

No I know it's a career that's what I just said....I was saying people define "career politican" by what i wrote about intending to go into politics from the get go"

That to me is exactly what a career politician is, someone who studies politics at university and then comes straight out of university straight into a cosy job in politics. These people have no experience of how the real world works, no experience of ever having a proper job outside of politics and no idea how ordinary folk live and work from day to day.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Josiah Bartlet!

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple  over a year ago

in Lancashire


"David Davis I know was born on a council estate got a degree and worked for Tate and Lyle!....I don't think that qualifies him as an expert in politics but definitely not as a career politican

He has been an MP for 29 years. I would say that 29 years qualifies as quite a career.

.

I've gut a childhood friend who's been bus driving for about that length of time but he didn't set out to do that....

A "career" politican is what would be described as a ppe at uni and straight into politics from their.... Like balls and copper or Cameron and Osborne.... Actually come to think of it I think they were all at Oxford together

I think we will have to just have to agree to disagree about the meaning of a career politician then if you dont think that 29 years counts as a career. .

No I know it's a career that's what I just said....I was saying people define "career politican" by what i wrote about intending to go into politics from the get go

That to me is exactly what a career politician is, someone who studies politics at university and then comes straight out of university straight into a cosy job in politics. These people have no experience of how the real world works, no experience of ever having a proper job outside of politics and no idea how ordinary folk live and work from day to day. "

I agree that the system where someone does Philosophy, Politics and Economics then the internship through someone their parents know and a safe seat is very much in need of reform and rightly so..

It just switches people off but choosing 'ordinary people' to represent a party may only result in a number of nodding dogs doing as they're told..

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

This is all a bit like Clancy's "Executive Orders"!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

right folks, enjoy your whinging, if off to the local for a drink, fun and laughter

keep on whinging, I will check up when I get back home

(some of us need to have fun and laughter)

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Jeremy Clarkson for Prime Minister

.

there are already 28000 signatures on the petition for this, so fellow fabbers, please please feel free to sign this petition.

.

all the more reason to sign, here are what some would consider reasons to vote for him

.

1 ENCOURAGE GLOBAL WARMING

Britons will be encouraged, through discounts and tax relief, to drive 4x4s, Jaguars and BMWs. Not only will this give a valuable boost to our oil industry, but it will encourage climate change. And what's not to like about global warming? Holland gets flooded and we get California's weather. That's what I call a win/win situation.

.

2 ABOLISH CRICKET

How can we take seriously a sport that stops for afternoon tea and whose followers wear striped blazers and bray like horses? Let's face it, we have been rubbish at cricket for years, so we should put an end to the endless cycle of misery in summer. My Government will bring back proper sports, such as jousting and bear-baiting.

.

3 END THE SPECIAL RELATIONSHIP

*****This will be reconsidered now that Trump is in office*******

The only thing special about our link with the U.S. is the amount of grovelling we do. My Government will stop acting as if Britain is the 51st state of the union. The last time I went across the Atlantic, I found people so stupid I'm convinced their nearest living relative must be a gherkin. They're the sort of people who can't read a road sign without moving their lips. Plus their cars are about as sexy as Ann Widdecombe's armpit.

.

4 BAN HEALTH & SAFETY

The safety bureaucrats are the abominable no-men, constantly dreaming up new reasons to abolish fun and hobble business. With their silly regulations, they have done more damage to British industry than the Luftwaffe. They are the human equivalent of a Lada. But at least you could drive a Lada off a cliff.

.

5 DEAL WITH YOUTH CRIME

It's true that some juvenile oiks come from broken homes where parents have all the child-rearing skills of King Herod. But let's stop making excuses. These delinquents have been creating mayhem for too long. They need to be taught some fear. Looking down the barrel of a sub-machine gun in a prison camp on the Outer Hebrides might do the trick.

.

6 REMOVE SPEED CAMERAS

****************************

Thanks to mass immigration, urban traffic moves at the speed of an arthritic snail. But still motorists are bullied by the rash of speed cameras, which are nothing more than a revenue-raising device. Serious criminals do not have to put up with this level of surveillance. My Government will tear down cameras and raise the motorway speed limit to 150mph.

***************************

.

7 TEACH BRITISH HISTORY

Pupils are taught to feel ashamed of their past, our national flag is treated as an embarrassment, our heritage as a source of shame. My Government would end this cultural cringe. The only problem with the Empire is that it wasn't big enough and didn't last long enough.

.

8 GET OUT OF IRAQ

Our involvement in Iraq has been the most misguided foreign adventure since Napoleon said: "I hear Moscow's nice at this time of year." As Prime Minister, I will bring back every British soldier and let the Iraqis get on with the national pastime of killing each other. And I'll put His Tonyness on trial for crimes against humanity and the Armed Services.

.

9 BRING BACK THE STOCKS

Despite Big Brother, there isn't enough humiliation in public life for those who deserve it. The medieval authorities had the right idea. The Beckhams will be the first in the stocks, followed by the chairman of the Health & Safety Executive.

.

10 END RECYCLING HELL

Putting out the rubbish used to be a simple task. Thanks to the tyrants of green officialdom, it has been turned into a nightmare. Placing the wrong garbage in the wrong bin is regarded as worse than mugging a granny. My Government will restore sanity by providing everyone with a bin the size of Bernard Manning, which will be emptied twice a week.

.

11 BANISHWALES

In my new-look Britain, Wales will be forced to go independent. Any country that has produced Neil Kinnock, Max Boyce and Charlotte Church does not deserve to remain in the UK.

.

12 AND EAST ANGLIA

That boring lump of flatness stretching out into the North Sea will have no place in Clarkson's Britain either. Then all those tiresome luvvies with second homes in Norfolk and Suffolk can have the thrill of going to a foreign country without flying to Tuscany.

.

13 BAN DIESEL CARS (Apart from Toyota Hilux)

A diesel has all the excitement of a vegan dinner party. It might be good for you, but so is cod liver oil. The same goes for lowemission cars such as the Toyota Prius. Feeling self-righteous as you tootle around at 10mph may earn you Brownie points with the knit-your-own-lentil brigade, but to the rest of the world, you look like a sanctimonious idiot.

.

14 END HUMAN RIGHTS

Under my Government, the rights of ordinary British citizens will have a higher priority than those of Islamic terrorists, Somalian gang-leaders and knife-wielding thugs. Homosexual pornography for deranged serial killers will not be regarded as a human right, nor will multi-million pound fees for hypocritical Leftwing lawyers milking the system.

.

15 KICK OUT BUREAUCRATS

The former U.S. President Ronald Reagan once said that the state was like a baby's alimentary canal: endless appetite at one end and utter irresponsibility at the other. My Government will reduce taxes by cracking down on all pen-sucking, paper-pushing jobsworths, outreach counsellors and parking enforcers, equality officers and drugs co-ordinators. Those who resist will be fed very, very slowly into their own office shredders.

.

16 FREEDOM TO SMOKE

In my Britain, smoking will no longer be seen as a crime against humanity. In fact, cigarettes will be encouraged in order to reduce the burden on the NHS and state pensions. After all, smokers perform a valuable public services by paying extortionate taxation, then generally failing to reach old age. The Marlboro Man has done more for our economy than any Chancellor.

.

17 BRITISH INDEPENDENCE

We fought the last war for our independence, and now we're under the heel of the unelected eurocrats of Brussels. Under my rule, Britain will withdraw from the EU, so we will no longer be governed by a bunch of sausage-eating Germans, French cheese-eating surrender monkeys and kebab-swallowing Greeks.

.

18 NO MORE COOL BRITANNIA

Cool is just a fancy word for pretentious or unpopular. The Clarkson Downing Street will not be interested in appearing "cool". Instead, my team will be encouraged to listen to Seventies rock music and wear figure-hugging blue jeans, no matter what their age.

.

19 CRACKDOWN ON CYCLISTS

Cycling is just as dreary as recycling and twice as pointless. My Government will come down heavily on this sanctimonious activity by introducing new taxes on Lycra, plastic helmets and the bicycles themselves. Altogether now: "Four wheels good, two wheels bad."

.

20 PUBLIC EXECUTIONS

Only those without any romantic sense of the richness of British history could pretend not to miss the public hangings at Newgate. The restoration of judicial killings before a cheering crowd would not only bring back some muchneeded colour to British life, but would also give the doomed prisoner the satisfaction of a brief burst of celebrity

.

MY CABINET

CHANCELLOR: Ken Dodd - very sound on taxation.

MINISTER OF TRANSPORT: Richard Hammond - a man with the right sense of priorities when it comes to modes of travel.

HOME SECRETARY: Henry Cooper - a knockout for criminals.

CABINET SECRETARY: Heidi Klum - no Cabinet meeting would ever be boring with the presence of the supermodel.

MINISTER FOR FOOD & DRINK: Keith Floyd - no more puritan lectures about alcohol units.

FOREIGN SECRETARY: Boris Johnson - diplomacy is his middle name

You can also support Clarkson for PM on facebook or again sign his online petition

.

come on fabbers, you know you want too, whats your favourite points on his manifesto???

.

"

Haha! Mine are 5,14,15 and 17. He'd get my vote

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Jeremy Clarkson for Prime Minister

.

there are already 28000 signatures on the petition for this, so fellow fabbers, please please feel free to sign this petition.

.

all the more reason to sign, here are what some would consider reasons to vote for him

.

1 ENCOURAGE GLOBAL WARMING

Britons will be encouraged, through discounts and tax relief, to drive 4x4s, Jaguars and BMWs. Not only will this give a valuable boost to our oil industry, but it will encourage climate change. And what's not to like about global warming? Holland gets flooded and we get California's weather. That's what I call a win/win situation.

.

2 ABOLISH CRICKET

How can we take seriously a sport that stops for afternoon tea and whose followers wear striped blazers and bray like horses? Let's face it, we have been rubbish at cricket for years, so we should put an end to the endless cycle of misery in summer. My Government will bring back proper sports, such as jousting and bear-baiting.

.

3 END THE SPECIAL RELATIONSHIP

*****This will be reconsidered now that Trump is in office*******

The only thing special about our link with the U.S. is the amount of grovelling we do. My Government will stop acting as if Britain is the 51st state of the union. The last time I went across the Atlantic, I found people so stupid I'm convinced their nearest living relative must be a gherkin. They're the sort of people who can't read a road sign without moving their lips. Plus their cars are about as sexy as Ann Widdecombe's armpit.

.

4 BAN HEALTH & SAFETY

The safety bureaucrats are the abominable no-men, constantly dreaming up new reasons to abolish fun and hobble business. With their silly regulations, they have done more damage to British industry than the Luftwaffe. They are the human equivalent of a Lada. But at least you could drive a Lada off a cliff.

.

5 DEAL WITH YOUTH CRIME

It's true that some juvenile oiks come from broken homes where parents have all the child-rearing skills of King Herod. But let's stop making excuses. These delinquents have been creating mayhem for too long. They need to be taught some fear. Looking down the barrel of a sub-machine gun in a prison camp on the Outer Hebrides might do the trick.

.

6 REMOVE SPEED CAMERAS

****************************

Thanks to mass immigration, urban traffic moves at the speed of an arthritic snail. But still motorists are bullied by the rash of speed cameras, which are nothing more than a revenue-raising device. Serious criminals do not have to put up with this level of surveillance. My Government will tear down cameras and raise the motorway speed limit to 150mph.

***************************

.

7 TEACH BRITISH HISTORY

Pupils are taught to feel ashamed of their past, our national flag is treated as an embarrassment, our heritage as a source of shame. My Government would end this cultural cringe. The only problem with the Empire is that it wasn't big enough and didn't last long enough.

.

8 GET OUT OF IRAQ

Our involvement in Iraq has been the most misguided foreign adventure since Napoleon said: "I hear Moscow's nice at this time of year." As Prime Minister, I will bring back every British soldier and let the Iraqis get on with the national pastime of killing each other. And I'll put His Tonyness on trial for crimes against humanity and the Armed Services.

.

9 BRING BACK THE STOCKS

Despite Big Brother, there isn't enough humiliation in public life for those who deserve it. The medieval authorities had the right idea. The Beckhams will be the first in the stocks, followed by the chairman of the Health & Safety Executive.

.

10 END RECYCLING HELL

Putting out the rubbish used to be a simple task. Thanks to the tyrants of green officialdom, it has been turned into a nightmare. Placing the wrong garbage in the wrong bin is regarded as worse than mugging a granny. My Government will restore sanity by providing everyone with a bin the size of Bernard Manning, which will be emptied twice a week.

.

11 BANISHWALES

In my new-look Britain, Wales will be forced to go independent. Any country that has produced Neil Kinnock, Max Boyce and Charlotte Church does not deserve to remain in the UK.

.

12 AND EAST ANGLIA

That boring lump of flatness stretching out into the North Sea will have no place in Clarkson's Britain either. Then all those tiresome luvvies with second homes in Norfolk and Suffolk can have the thrill of going to a foreign country without flying to Tuscany.

.

13 BAN DIESEL CARS (Apart from Toyota Hilux)

A diesel has all the excitement of a vegan dinner party. It might be good for you, but so is cod liver oil. The same goes for lowemission cars such as the Toyota Prius. Feeling self-righteous as you tootle around at 10mph may earn you Brownie points with the knit-your-own-lentil brigade, but to the rest of the world, you look like a sanctimonious idiot.

.

14 END HUMAN RIGHTS

Under my Government, the rights of ordinary British citizens will have a higher priority than those of Islamic terrorists, Somalian gang-leaders and knife-wielding thugs. Homosexual pornography for deranged serial killers will not be regarded as a human right, nor will multi-million pound fees for hypocritical Leftwing lawyers milking the system.

.

15 KICK OUT BUREAUCRATS

The former U.S. President Ronald Reagan once said that the state was like a baby's alimentary canal: endless appetite at one end and utter irresponsibility at the other. My Government will reduce taxes by cracking down on all pen-sucking, paper-pushing jobsworths, outreach counsellors and parking enforcers, equality officers and drugs co-ordinators. Those who resist will be fed very, very slowly into their own office shredders.

.

16 FREEDOM TO SMOKE

In my Britain, smoking will no longer be seen as a crime against humanity. In fact, cigarettes will be encouraged in order to reduce the burden on the NHS and state pensions. After all, smokers perform a valuable public services by paying extortionate taxation, then generally failing to reach old age. The Marlboro Man has done more for our economy than any Chancellor.

.

17 BRITISH INDEPENDENCE

We fought the last war for our independence, and now we're under the heel of the unelected eurocrats of Brussels. Under my rule, Britain will withdraw from the EU, so we will no longer be governed by a bunch of sausage-eating Germans, French cheese-eating surrender monkeys and kebab-swallowing Greeks.

.

18 NO MORE COOL BRITANNIA

Cool is just a fancy word for pretentious or unpopular. The Clarkson Downing Street will not be interested in appearing "cool". Instead, my team will be encouraged to listen to Seventies rock music and wear figure-hugging blue jeans, no matter what their age.

.

19 CRACKDOWN ON CYCLISTS

Cycling is just as dreary as recycling and twice as pointless. My Government will come down heavily on this sanctimonious activity by introducing new taxes on Lycra, plastic helmets and the bicycles themselves. Altogether now: "Four wheels good, two wheels bad."

.

20 PUBLIC EXECUTIONS

Only those without any romantic sense of the richness of British history could pretend not to miss the public hangings at Newgate. The restoration of judicial killings before a cheering crowd would not only bring back some muchneeded colour to British life, but would also give the doomed prisoner the satisfaction of a brief burst of celebrity

.

MY CABINET

CHANCELLOR: Ken Dodd - very sound on taxation.

MINISTER OF TRANSPORT: Richard Hammond - a man with the right sense of priorities when it comes to modes of travel.

HOME SECRETARY: Henry Cooper - a knockout for criminals.

CABINET SECRETARY: Heidi Klum - no Cabinet meeting would ever be boring with the presence of the supermodel.

MINISTER FOR FOOD & DRINK: Keith Floyd - no more puritan lectures about alcohol units.

FOREIGN SECRETARY: Boris Johnson - diplomacy is his middle name

You can also support Clarkson for PM on facebook or again sign his online petition

.

come on fabbers, you know you want too, whats your favourite points on his manifesto???

.

Haha! Mine are 5,14,15 and 17. He'd get my vote "

all except 2. You can't ban cricket

Thats just...well, its just not cricket

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By *LCCCouple  over a year ago

Cambridge


"Watched Press preview on sky news last night and it appears Aaron Banks the millionaire Ukip donor will run a campaign at the next general election where he is going to put ordinary people with ordinary jobs up for election in around 200 constituency seats against the career politicians. These arrogant distant career politicians had better watch out the people are coming for you.

My local MP is new to this parliament, before that she was educated as a scientist and ran the family business. Is she the kind of person that he wants to replace?

Or what about me, I'm not a politician, I'm an ordinary guy with an ordinary background and an ordinary job, would you want me as your MP?

No the career politicians that will be targeted are the likes of Ed Miliband, Nick Clegg and George Osborne who have never had a proper job outside of politics.

What about May, or Boris, or David Davis then? Should we get rid of them too? How about Farage, not an MP, but certainly a career politician isn't he?

Theresa May could be fair game as I'm not aware that she has had a job outside of politics.

Boris Johnson has had a job outside of politics as a newspaper columnist. David Davis had a job outside of politics at Tate and Lyle as explained in a post earlier by The doors. Nigel Farage had a job outside of politics as a trader in London. "

Ok well Ed Miliband was a journalist and a visiting scholar at Harvard before becoming an MP so I guess he can stay after all.

Nick Clegg was a journalist and author before he was an MEP so I guess he can stay too.

And George Osbourne was also a journalist before he got into politics so I guess he can stay too huh?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Watched Press preview on sky news last night and it appears Aaron Banks the millionaire Ukip donor will run a campaign at the next general election where he is going to put ordinary people with ordinary jobs up for election in around 200 constituency seats against the career politicians. These arrogant distant career politicians had better watch out the people are coming for you.

My local MP is new to this parliament, before that she was educated as a scientist and ran the family business. Is she the kind of person that he wants to replace?

Or what about me, I'm not a politician, I'm an ordinary guy with an ordinary background and an ordinary job, would you want me as your MP?

No the career politicians that will be targeted are the likes of Ed Miliband, Nick Clegg and George Osborne who have never had a proper job outside of politics.

What about May, or Boris, or David Davis then? Should we get rid of them too? How about Farage, not an MP, but certainly a career politician isn't he?

Theresa May could be fair game as I'm not aware that she has had a job outside of politics.

Boris Johnson has had a job outside of politics as a newspaper columnist. David Davis had a job outside of politics at Tate and Lyle as explained in a post earlier by The doors. Nigel Farage had a job outside of politics as a trader in London.

Ok well Ed Miliband was a journalist and a visiting scholar at Harvard before becoming an MP so I guess he can stay after all.

Nick Clegg was a journalist and author before he was an MEP so I guess he can stay too.

And George Osbourne was also a journalist before he got into politics so I guess he can stay too huh?

"

journalist

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By *unandbuckCouple  over a year ago

Sheffield


"

Ok well Ed Miliband was a journalist and a visiting scholar at Harvard before becoming an MP so I guess he can stay after all.

Nick Clegg was a journalist and author before he was an MEP so I guess he can stay too.

And George Osbourne was also a journalist before he got into politics so I guess he can stay too huh?

"

Hmmm journalist is too borderline to count as a 'proper' job outside of politics, they'd all have to go , I'm afraid

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By *LCCCouple  over a year ago

Cambridge


"

Ok well Ed Miliband was a journalist and a visiting scholar at Harvard before becoming an MP so I guess he can stay after all.

Nick Clegg was a journalist and author before he was an MEP so I guess he can stay too.

And George Osbourne was also a journalist before he got into politics so I guess he can stay too huh?

Hmmm journalist is too borderline to count as a 'proper' job outside of politics, they'd all have to go , I'm afraid "

So we shouldn't have had Churchill then? So we should get rid of other former journalists like Boris and Gove?

Obviously not a British politician, but Gandhi was a journalist, should that have barred him from politics?

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By *unandbuckCouple  over a year ago

Sheffield


"

Ok well Ed Miliband was a journalist and a visiting scholar at Harvard before becoming an MP so I guess he can stay after all.

Nick Clegg was a journalist and author before he was an MEP so I guess he can stay too.

And George Osbourne was also a journalist before he got into politics so I guess he can stay too huh?

Hmmm journalist is too borderline to count as a 'proper' job outside of politics, they'd all have to go , I'm afraid

So we shouldn't have had Churchill then? So we should get rid of other former journalists like Boris and Gove?

Obviously not a British politician, but Gandhi was a journalist, should that have barred him from politics? "

Don't really put Ghandi and Churchill in the same class as Gove and Boris.

It's the general principle that is important to me.

People who imagine they can run a goverment department but who have no experience of managing a large team, managing an organisational budget or extensive experience in the field of that department should not be given control over it.

The exact rules as how to implement that can be wrangled out.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Can we have an American Prime Minister??

would be nice to have a female Prime Minister, so I nominate:-

Jennifer Aniston

anyone agree?

second choice would be:

Jennifer Aniston

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Watched Press preview on sky news last night and it appears Aaron Banks the millionaire Ukip donor will run a campaign at the next general election where he is going to put ordinary people with ordinary jobs up for election in around 200 constituency seats against the career politicians. These arrogant distant career politicians had better watch out the people are coming for you. "

I've said for years that this should happen, they will get my vote.

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By *entaur_UKMan  over a year ago

Cannock


"Watched Press preview on sky news last night and it appears Aaron Banks the millionaire Ukip donor will run a campaign at the next general election where he is going to put ordinary people with ordinary jobs up for election in around 200 constituency seats against the career politicians. These arrogant distant career politicians had better watch out the people are coming for you.

My local MP is new to this parliament, before that she was educated as a scientist and ran the family business. Is she the kind of person that he wants to replace?

Or what about me, I'm not a politician, I'm an ordinary guy with an ordinary background and an ordinary job, would you want me as your MP?

No the career politicians that will be targeted are the likes of Ed Miliband, Nick Clegg and George Osborne who have never had a proper job outside of politics.

What about May, or Boris, or David Davis then? Should we get rid of them too? How about Farage, not an MP, but certainly a career politician isn't he?

Theresa May could be fair game as I'm not aware that she has had a job outside of politics.

Boris Johnson has had a job outside of politics as a newspaper columnist. David Davis had a job outside of politics at Tate and Lyle as explained in a post earlier by The doors. Nigel Farage had a job outside of politics as a trader in London.

Ok well Ed Miliband was a journalist and a visiting scholar at Harvard before becoming an MP so I guess he can stay after all.

Nick Clegg was a journalist and author before he was an MEP so I guess he can stay too.

And George Osbourne was also a journalist before he got into politics so I guess he can stay too huh?

journalist "

The visiting scholar at Harvard made me laugh.

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By *LCCCouple  over a year ago

Cambridge


"Watched Press preview on sky news last night and it appears Aaron Banks the millionaire Ukip donor will run a campaign at the next general election where he is going to put ordinary people with ordinary jobs up for election in around 200 constituency seats against the career politicians. These arrogant distant career politicians had better watch out the people are coming for you.

My local MP is new to this parliament, before that she was educated as a scientist and ran the family business. Is she the kind of person that he wants to replace?

Or what about me, I'm not a politician, I'm an ordinary guy with an ordinary background and an ordinary job, would you want me as your MP?

No the career politicians that will be targeted are the likes of Ed Miliband, Nick Clegg and George Osborne who have never had a proper job outside of politics.

What about May, or Boris, or David Davis then? Should we get rid of them too? How about Farage, not an MP, but certainly a career politician isn't he?

Theresa May could be fair game as I'm not aware that she has had a job outside of politics.

Boris Johnson has had a job outside of politics as a newspaper columnist. David Davis had a job outside of politics at Tate and Lyle as explained in a post earlier by The doors. Nigel Farage had a job outside of politics as a trader in London.

Ok well Ed Miliband was a journalist and a visiting scholar at Harvard before becoming an MP so I guess he can stay after all.

Nick Clegg was a journalist and author before he was an MEP so I guess he can stay too.

And George Osbourne was also a journalist before he got into politics so I guess he can stay too huh?

journalist

The visiting scholar at Harvard made me laugh. "

Do you think you'll ever be asked to be a Harvard scholar?

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By *unandbuckCouple  over a year ago

Sheffield


"W

The visiting scholar at Harvard made me laugh.

Do you think you'll ever be asked to be a Harvard scholar? "

None of us will. Does that make our opinions less valid?

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By *LCCCouple  over a year ago

Cambridge


"W

The visiting scholar at Harvard made me laugh.

Do you think you'll ever be asked to be a Harvard scholar?

None of us will. Does that make our opinions less valid?"

Why is it being a scholar at one of the best universities in the world something to be laughed at though?

And to be fair, you don't know the backgrounds of everyone here, and who has been a visiting scholar where.

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By *unandbuckCouple  over a year ago

Sheffield


"W

The visiting scholar at Harvard made me laugh.

Do you think you'll ever be asked to be a Harvard scholar?

None of us will. Does that make our opinions less valid?

Why is it being a scholar at one of the best universities in the world something to be laughed at though?

And to be fair, you don't know the backgrounds of everyone here, and who has been a visiting scholar where. "

That wasn't my comment. But a reasonable assumption might be that most of us aren't going to be invited to Harvard. I apologise to you CLCC if you have been or might be.

My point was aimed at your comment which I took to be purposely belittling.

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By *LCCCouple  over a year ago

Cambridge


"W

The visiting scholar at Harvard made me laugh.

Do you think you'll ever be asked to be a Harvard scholar?

None of us will. Does that make our opinions less valid?

Why is it being a scholar at one of the best universities in the world something to be laughed at though?

And to be fair, you don't know the backgrounds of everyone here, and who has been a visiting scholar where.

That wasn't my comment. But a reasonable assumption might be that most of us aren't going to be invited to Harvard. I apologise to you CLCC if you have been or might be.

My point was aimed at your comment which I took to be purposely belittling."

Don't you think he was purposely belittling Miliband's achievement?

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By *unandbuckCouple  over a year ago

Sheffield


"W

My point was aimed at your comment which I took to be purposely belittling.

Don't you think he was purposely belittling Miliband's achievement? "

Yes I do. But well done for sticking up for Ed , can't have a forumite bringing down a politician.

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By *anes HubbyCouple  over a year ago

Babbacombe Torquay

Ed fell foul of the modernist thirst for charisma in a political leader

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By *entaur_UKMan  over a year ago

Cannock


"Watched Press preview on sky news last night and it appears Aaron Banks the millionaire Ukip donor will run a campaign at the next general election where he is going to put ordinary people with ordinary jobs up for election in around 200 constituency seats against the career politicians. These arrogant distant career politicians had better watch out the people are coming for you.

My local MP is new to this parliament, before that she was educated as a scientist and ran the family business. Is she the kind of person that he wants to replace?

Or what about me, I'm not a politician, I'm an ordinary guy with an ordinary background and an ordinary job, would you want me as your MP?

No the career politicians that will be targeted are the likes of Ed Miliband, Nick Clegg and George Osborne who have never had a proper job outside of politics.

What about May, or Boris, or David Davis then? Should we get rid of them too? How about Farage, not an MP, but certainly a career politician isn't he?

Theresa May could be fair game as I'm not aware that she has had a job outside of politics.

Boris Johnson has had a job outside of politics as a newspaper columnist. David Davis had a job outside of politics at Tate and Lyle as explained in a post earlier by The doors. Nigel Farage had a job outside of politics as a trader in London.

Ok well Ed Miliband was a journalist and a visiting scholar at Harvard before becoming an MP so I guess he can stay after all.

Nick Clegg was a journalist and author before he was an MEP so I guess he can stay too.

And George Osbourne was also a journalist before he got into politics so I guess he can stay too huh?

journalist

The visiting scholar at Harvard made me laugh.

Do you think you'll ever be asked to be a Harvard scholar? "

No and I really wouldn't want to. At least I can eat a bacon sandwich properly.

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple  over a year ago

in Lancashire

So in essence the party that thrives itself of not being part of the establishment is going to do what the other parties they denigrate as being part of the establishment do..

welcome UKIP to the Westminster bubble..

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By *unandbuckCouple  over a year ago

Sheffield


"Ed fell foul of the modernist thirst for charisma in a political leader"

A leader in any aspect of life should have charisma and ability.

Someone pushing for the top job in the country should have both of them in abundance.

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By *LCCCouple  over a year ago

Cambridge


"W

My point was aimed at your comment which I took to be purposely belittling.

Don't you think he was purposely belittling Miliband's achievement?

Yes I do. But well done for sticking up for Ed , can't have a forumite bringing down a politician."

I didn't do it for Miliband, I would have asked centaur if he could run the 100m in under 10 seconds if he had belittled Bolt.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Not sure if this is what I meant when I started the thread lol but glad it got some interest

Karen Brady would Probbally get my vote

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By *LCCCouple  over a year ago

Cambridge

I think Jim Al-Khalili would be good.

What about Stephen Fry?

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By *unandbuckCouple  over a year ago

Sheffield


"W

My point was aimed at your comment which I took to be purposely belittling.

Don't you think he was purposely belittling Miliband's achievement?

Yes I do. But well done for sticking up for Ed , can't have a forumite bringing down a politician.

I didn't do it for Miliband, I would have asked centaur if he could run the 100m in under 10 seconds if he had belittled Bolt."

Ie bring anyone down who doesn't agree with you.

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By *LCCCouple  over a year ago

Cambridge


"W

My point was aimed at your comment which I took to be purposely belittling.

Don't you think he was purposely belittling Miliband's achievement?

Yes I do. But well done for sticking up for Ed , can't have a forumite bringing down a politician.

I didn't do it for Miliband, I would have asked centaur if he could run the 100m in under 10 seconds if he had belittled Bolt.

Ie bring anyone down who doesn't agree with you."

Fine, I would challenge anyone, of any politcal persuasion, if they laughed at the incredible achievement of other people, when they couldn't achieve the subject of the mockery. Happy now?

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