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Sex Hurts

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By *ab fem OP   Woman 4 weeks ago

Ayrshire

Have you ever hurt yourself during sex, what happened?

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By *ellinever70Woman 4 weeks ago

ayrshire

You're very nosey

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By *ab fem OP   Woman 4 weeks ago

Ayrshire


"You're very nosey "

And you love your one line boring posts but you don't see me going on about it

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By *ellinever70Woman 4 weeks ago

ayrshire


"You're very nosey

And you love your one line boring posts but you don't see me going on about it "

Ouch

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By *luebell888Woman 4 weeks ago

Glasgow


"Have you ever hurt yourself during sex, what happened? "

Nope, im a tough cookie although friction burns can sting like hell and take ages to heal

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By *oggy1970Couple 4 weeks ago

Glasgow

Semen in the eye is the worst so far....thankfully.

Stings like a mammy pumper, doesn't it.

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By *ab fem OP   Woman 4 weeks ago

Ayrshire

I've fallen off the bed straight onto my back before, carried on like a trooper though

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By *abswinger54Man 4 weeks ago

central

Yep done my hamstring it was agony

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By *inderellaWoman 4 weeks ago

Edinburgh

I fell off a bed once but was fine. However I once met someone and apparently I broke his fingers. I think he was just a wimp and a drama queen though

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By *uburban_kinkCouple 4 weeks ago

Motherwell

We had some pretty vigorous sex on a rug which resulted in an uncomfortable, but soon forgotten friction burn on her spine.

When it scabbed over a few days later she completely forgot its origins and ended up asking her mum to take a look as this strange thing on her back ... she now knows her mum knew exactly what it was

Still has a wee scar to this day.

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By *ab fem OP   Woman 4 weeks ago

Ayrshire


"I fell off a bed once but was fine. However I once met someone and apparently I broke his fingers. I think he was just a wimp and a drama queen though "

Finger blasting can be dangerous, take heed guys!

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By *ust for fun 11Woman 4 weeks ago

Glasgow

Carpet burns are a nightmare

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By *ab fem OP   Woman 4 weeks ago

Ayrshire


"We had some pretty vigorous sex on a rug which resulted in an uncomfortable, but soon forgotten friction burn on her spine.

When it scabbed over a few days later she completely forgot its origins and ended up asking her mum to take a look as this strange thing on her back ... she now knows her mum knew exactly what it was

Still has a wee scar to this day."

Oh no

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By *oggy1970Couple 4 weeks ago

Glasgow


"We had some pretty vigorous sex on a rug which resulted in an uncomfortable, but soon forgotten friction burn on her spine.

When it scabbed over a few days later she completely forgot its origins and ended up asking her mum to take a look as this strange thing on her back ... she now knows her mum knew exactly what it was

Still has a wee scar to this day."

You haven't pumped me have you? Pretty much same thing happened to me. Wee Mammy didn't know whether to drown me in Lourdes water or ch*ke me with her Rosary beads

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By *ittleMizzNaughty88Woman 4 weeks ago

Renfrewshire

Smacked my face off a shelf nearly knocked myself out while on all fours trying to explain the black eye to people proved difficult

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By *ortland51Man 4 weeks ago

Glasgow

Not me. I wear full PPE at all times during sex including a harness, hard hat and hi vis vest.

Can't be too careful.

Sometimes I also make the beeping sound when reversing out.

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By *adbury girlWoman 4 weeks ago

Lanarkshire


"I've fallen off the bed straight onto my back before, carried on like a trooper though "

Was it bad of me to laugh at this?

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By *ekked JackMan 4 weeks ago

Glasgow

Nearly tore my pinky toe off catching it on the bed post.. Have the scar to prove it.

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By *inderellaWoman 4 weeks ago

Edinburgh


"Not me. I wear full PPE at all times during sex including a harness, hard hat and hi vis vest.

Can't be too careful.

Sometimes I also make the beeping sound when reversing out. "

Oddly this sounds quite sexy

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By *appygolucky1981Man 4 weeks ago

West Lothian

Younger days my then girlfriend pulled a bit hard.. tore the skin connecting foreskin to the head..

Oh the blood... it was up the walls.

No long lasting effects though.

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By *ortland51Man 4 weeks ago

Glasgow


"Not me. I wear full PPE at all times during sex including a harness, hard hat and hi vis vest.

Can't be too careful.

Sometimes I also make the beeping sound when reversing out.

Oddly this sounds quite sexy "

It's the beeping, isn't it.

The beeping gets them all.

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By *ok StarrMan 4 weeks ago

Glasgow

Driving and receiving BJ at same time.

Swerved to avoid sheep on road and hit a fence

Teeth marks on penis for weeks

My mate was in the back with lady’s friend and broke his pelvis

Funny thinking about it now, his missus didn’t see the funny side though

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By *oShrinkingVioletWoman 4 weeks ago

fairyland


"Have you ever hurt yourself during sex, what happened? "

Yep more than once, guys being too big and too keen been torn and bruised before, nothing worse you’re having fun then ooh that’s a bit sore and again nope nope we gotta stop that’s just not working and it puts me right off even attempting on going near the more endowed men

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By *D40Man 4 weeks ago

Glasgow


"You're very nosey

And you love your one line boring posts but you don't see me going on about it "

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By *oanne_MacTV/TS 4 weeks ago

Central, Scotland..

Banjo string

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By *oShrinkingVioletWoman 4 weeks ago

fairyland


"Banjo string "

Few folk I know have had this happen and doesn’t sound good ouch

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By *oanne_MacTV/TS 4 weeks ago

Central, Scotland..


"Banjo string

Few folk I know have had this happen and doesn’t sound good ouch "

The worsts the fear of peeing for weeks while it heals

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By *ortland51Man 4 weeks ago

Glasgow


"Banjo string "

You'd be better off being hit with a banjo during sex. Repeatedly.

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By *ancexxxMan 4 weeks ago

Ayr

Bloody cramp can be brutal oh and sex on a stairway surprisingly hazardous

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By *ompip3Couple 4 weeks ago

Paisley

Pip and I were having some fun with Fem/Fem couple in a campervan in France.... Pip was having a push pull play with the more girly partner, when their hands slipped and Pips face and the other fems knee connected!!

Travelling home the next day was embarrassing going through customs with a huge black eye!

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By *otnewtothis75Man 4 weeks ago

Borders

When I was 17 I had a frenulum tear which was absolute agony

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By *ellinever70Woman 4 weeks ago

ayrshire

Does nobody ever just have good sex without incident?

Is that just too normal, not dramatic enough?

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By *oggy1970Couple 4 weeks ago

Glasgow


"Does nobody ever just have good sex without incident?

Is that just too normal, not dramatic enough?"

Yeah. Want to start a thread on it?

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By *ab fem OP   Woman 4 weeks ago

Ayrshire


"

Sometimes I also make the beeping sound when reversing out. "

Is that you pretending to be a bin lorry?

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By *ab fem OP   Woman 4 weeks ago

Ayrshire


"Semen in the eye is the worst so far....thankfully.

Stings like a mammy pumper, doesn't it."

You need jizz goggles. You'll never get pink eye again with those bad boys

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By *ekked JackMan 4 weeks ago

Glasgow


"Does nobody ever just have good sex without incident?

Is that just too normal, not dramatic enough?"

The OP isn't about good sex.. It's about hurting yourself during sex... Face palm

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By *ellinever70Woman 4 weeks ago

ayrshire


"Does nobody ever just have good sex without incident?

Is that just too normal, not dramatic enough?

Yeah. Want to start a thread on it?"

And risk getting no replies?

My ego couldn't withstand that

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By *ellinever70Woman 4 weeks ago

ayrshire


"Does nobody ever just have good sex without incident?

Is that just too normal, not dramatic enough?

The OP isn't about good sex.. It's about hurting yourself during sex... Face palm

"

Ok boss

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By *oggy1970Couple 4 weeks ago

Glasgow

[Removed by poster at 21/03/19 10:28:30]

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By *oggy1970Couple 4 weeks ago

Glasgow

[Removed by poster at 21/03/19 10:29:10]

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By *oggy1970Couple 4 weeks ago

Glasgow

[Removed by poster at 21/03/19 10:30:02]

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By *ekked JackMan 4 weeks ago

Glasgow

[Removed by poster at 21/03/19 10:30:25]

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By *oggy1970Couple 4 weeks ago

Glasgow

[Removed by poster at 21/03/19 10:31:02]

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By *ldie but goodyWoman 4 weeks ago

lanarkshire

Ffs spit it out!!!

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By *ab fem OP   Woman 4 weeks ago

Ayrshire

You two gliching

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By *oggy1970Couple 4 weeks ago

Glasgow

[Removed by poster at 21/03/19 10:32:23]

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By *oShrinkingVioletWoman 4 weeks ago

fairyland

[Removed by poster at 21/03/19 10:32:10]

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By *appygolucky1981Man 4 weeks ago

West Lothian


"Ffs spit it out!!!"

Think that was another question on another forum..

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By *oggy1970Couple 4 weeks ago

Glasgow

Awwwww...got it. I'm trying to say a word that isn't allowed.

Epic blonde moment.

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By *adbury girlWoman 4 weeks ago

Lanarkshire


"Ffs spit it out!!!

Think that was another question on another forum.."

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By *ellinever70Woman 4 weeks ago

ayrshire


"

You two gliching "

They're choosing their words carefully

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By *ekked JackMan 4 weeks ago

Glasgow


"Awwwww...got it. I'm trying to say a word that isn't allowed.

Epic blonde moment."

Yeah but wee was good too.. Pissing all over the thread.

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By *ab fem OP   Woman 4 weeks ago

Ayrshire


"Awwwww...got it. I'm trying to say a word that isn't allowed.

Epic blonde moment.

Yeah but wee was good too.. Pissing all over the thread. "

Think you should be on the golden shower thread

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By *ade and VanessaCouple 4 weeks ago

Central Scotland


"Does nobody ever just have good sex without incident?

Is that just too normal, not dramatic enough?"

99.9999% of the time. Accidents do happen though.

V x

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By *all with TattoosMan 4 weeks ago

Glasgow

Snapped my Banjo string

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By *ldie but goodyWoman 4 weeks ago

lanarkshire


"Ffs spit it out!!!

Think that was another question on another forum.."

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By *earded blossomCouple 4 weeks ago

Glasgow


"Snapped my Banjo string "

Yup not good happened to me twice now

John

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By *oggy1970Couple 4 weeks ago

Glasgow


"Snapped my Banjo string

Yup not good happened to me twice now

John "

You have 2 banjo strings?

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By *ellinever70Woman 4 weeks ago

ayrshire


"Awwwww...got it. I'm trying to say a word that isn't allowed.

Epic blonde moment.

Yeah but wee was good too.. Pissing all over the thread. "

Calm down

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By *imbobalishMan 4 weeks ago

Glasgow


"Younger days my then girlfriend pulled a bit hard.. tore the skin connecting foreskin to the head..

Oh the blood... it was up the walls.

No long lasting effects though.

"

This.

Didn’t like it. Careful of proper lubrication ever since (the right kind, not blood )

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By *ekked JackMan 4 weeks ago

Glasgow


"Awwwww...got it. I'm trying to say a word that isn't allowed.

Epic blonde moment.

Yeah but wee was good too.. Pissing all over the thread.

Calm down "

You should know by now I'm always calm.

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By (user no longer on site) 4 weeks ago


"Not me. I wear full PPE at all times during sex including a harness, hard hat and hi vis vest.

Can't be too careful.

Sometimes I also make the beeping sound when reversing out.

Oddly this sounds quite sexy

It's the beeping, isn't it.

The beeping gets them all.

"

Caution this vehicle is cumming! PPE is very important especially safety glasses. Could have saved wee doggy a lot of pain!

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By *rewdog6.5Man 4 weeks ago

glasgow

Never hurt my self but I did crack someones ribs having sex

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By *ekked JackMan 4 weeks ago

Glasgow


"Never hurt my self but I did crack someones ribs having sex "

CPR isn't sex.

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By *oggy1970Couple 4 weeks ago

Glasgow


"Semen in the eye is the worst so far....thankfully.

Stings like a mammy pumper, doesn't it.

You need jizz goggles. You'll never get pink eye again with those bad boys "

Is this another item in your basic blow job kit....along with your gobble bobble? . I like a woman who's prepared!

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By *tew008Man 4 weeks ago

edinburgh


"Have you ever hurt yourself during sex, what happened? "

You ran out of ideas

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By *appygolucky1981Man 4 weeks ago

West Lothian


"Younger days my then girlfriend pulled a bit hard.. tore the skin connecting foreskin to the head..

Oh the blood... it was up the walls.

No long lasting effects though.

This.

Didn’t like it. Careful of proper lubrication ever since (the right kind, not blood )"

Aye..hard lesson learned.

I remember being so embarrassed I just went to sleep and hoped I didn't bleed to death..haha

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By *ellinever70Woman 4 weeks ago

ayrshire


"Younger days my then girlfriend pulled a bit hard.. tore the skin connecting foreskin to the head..

Oh the blood... it was up the walls.

No long lasting effects though.

This.

Didn’t like it. Careful of proper lubrication ever since (the right kind, not blood )

Aye..hard lesson learned.

I remember being so embarrassed I just went to sleep and hoped I didn't bleed to death..haha"

Wait til she's turned on in future

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By *appygolucky1981Man 4 weeks ago

West Lothian


"Wait til she's turned on in future "

Haha..fine advice.. though the instrument of pain was in fact her hand. Not sure sweatier hands would have had me quite as aroused..but may have avoided the pain.

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By *ab fem OP   Woman 4 weeks ago

Ayrshire


"Semen in the eye is the worst so far....thankfully.

Stings like a mammy pumper, doesn't it.

You need jizz goggles. You'll never get pink eye again with those bad boys

Is this another item in your basic blow job kit....along with your gobble bobble? . I like a woman who's prepared!"

Fail to prepare, prepare to fail.

That's my expert cock handler kit. I've got gobble bobbles, jizz goggles, family sized tub of vaseline, cock rings, vibrating cock rings, cock cages, penis beakers and polo mints. Not forgetting the condoms of many sizes of course

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By *ellinever70Woman 4 weeks ago

ayrshire


"Semen in the eye is the worst so far....thankfully.

Stings like a mammy pumper, doesn't it.

You need jizz goggles. You'll never get pink eye again with those bad boys

Is this another item in your basic blow job kit....along with your gobble bobble? . I like a woman who's prepared!

Fail to prepare, prepare to fail.

That's my expert cock handler kit. I've got gobble bobbles, jizz goggles, family sized tub of vaseline, cock rings, vibrating cock rings, cock cages, penis beakers and polo mints. Not forgetting the condoms of many sizes of course "

But do you have a suitcase?

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By *ab fem OP   Woman 4 weeks ago

Ayrshire


"Wait til she's turned on in future

Haha..fine advice.. though the instrument of pain was in fact her hand. Not sure sweatier hands would have had me quite as aroused..but may have avoided the pain."

sweaty hands

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By *ab fem OP   Woman 4 weeks ago

Ayrshire


"Semen in the eye is the worst so far....thankfully.

Stings like a mammy pumper, doesn't it.

You need jizz goggles. You'll never get pink eye again with those bad boys

Is this another item in your basic blow job kit....along with your gobble bobble? . I like a woman who's prepared!

Fail to prepare, prepare to fail.

That's my expert cock handler kit. I've got gobble bobbles, jizz goggles, family sized tub of vaseline, cock rings, vibrating cock rings, cock cages, penis beakers and polo mints. Not forgetting the condoms of many sizes of course

But do you have a suitcase?"

Why you wanting to climb in it? I'll look out the padlock

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By *ekked JackMan 4 weeks ago

Glasgow


"Semen in the eye is the worst so far....thankfully.

Stings like a mammy pumper, doesn't it.

You need jizz goggles. You'll never get pink eye again with those bad boys

Is this another item in your basic blow job kit....along with your gobble bobble? . I like a woman who's prepared!

Fail to prepare, prepare to fail.

That's my expert cock handler kit. I've got gobble bobbles, jizz goggles, family sized tub of vaseline, cock rings, vibrating cock rings, cock cages, penis beakers and polo mints. Not forgetting the condoms of many sizes of course "

No chance of a "quickie" with you then.

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By *ellinever70Woman 4 weeks ago

ayrshire


"Semen in the eye is the worst so far....thankfully.

Stings like a mammy pumper, doesn't it.

You need jizz goggles. You'll never get pink eye again with those bad boys

Is this another item in your basic blow job kit....along with your gobble bobble? . I like a woman who's prepared!

Fail to prepare, prepare to fail.

That's my expert cock handler kit. I've got gobble bobbles, jizz goggles, family sized tub of vaseline, cock rings, vibrating cock rings, cock cages, penis beakers and polo mints. Not forgetting the condoms of many sizes of course

But do you have a suitcase?

Why you wanting to climb in it? I'll look out the padlock "

No silly...for your sex kit of course

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By *ickandDomMan 4 weeks ago

West central Scotland

I almost drowned today.

Does that count? :-/

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By *tew008Man 4 weeks ago

edinburgh


"I almost drowned today.

Does that count? :-/ "

Only if you were getting off on it.

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By *ab fem OP   Woman 4 weeks ago

Ayrshire


"I almost drowned today.

Does that count? :-/ "

What happened?

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By *ickandDomMan 4 weeks ago

West central Scotland


"I almost drowned today.

Does that count? :-/

What happened? "

She gushes a lot. And a lot. And a lot

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By *ason Todd100Man 4 weeks ago

Gotham City

[Removed by poster at 21/03/19 15:39:24]

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By *nicorn on wheelsWoman 4 weeks ago

scotland

I dislocated my shoulder once when I was at a ‘party’ while I was only fours, pushed too hard and my shoulder just came straight out. Try to come up with a reason for my attire and shoulder out at a&e was interesting to say the least

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By *oggy1970Couple 4 weeks ago

Glasgow


"Semen in the eye is the worst so far....thankfully.

Stings like a mammy pumper, doesn't it.

You need jizz goggles. You'll never get pink eye again with those bad boys

Is this another item in your basic blow job kit....along with your gobble bobble? . I like a woman who's prepared!

Fail to prepare, prepare to fail.

That's my expert cock handler kit. I've got gobble bobbles, jizz goggles, family sized tub of vaseline, cock rings, vibrating cock rings, cock cages, penis beakers and polo mints. Not forgetting the condoms of many sizes of course "

Penis beaker!

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By *oanne_MacTV/TS 4 weeks ago

Central, Scotland..


"Semen in the eye is the worst so far....thankfully.

Stings like a mammy pumper, doesn't it.

You need jizz goggles. You'll never get pink eye again with those bad boys

Is this another item in your basic blow job kit....along with your gobble bobble? . I like a woman who's prepared!

Fail to prepare, prepare to fail.

That's my expert cock handler kit. I've got gobble bobbles, jizz goggles, family sized tub of vaseline, cock rings, vibrating cock rings, cock cages, penis beakers and polo mints. Not forgetting the condoms of many sizes of course

Penis beaker! "

Gobble bobbles made me

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By *ason Todd100Man 4 weeks ago

Gotham City

Woman took a chunk out my knob while giving me head blood everywhere

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By *ab fem OP   Woman 4 weeks ago

Ayrshire


"Woman took a chunk out my knob while giving me head blood everywhere "

Ahh is that why everyone calls you half tadger todd

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By *ason Todd100Man 4 weeks ago

Gotham City


"Woman took a chunk out my knob while giving me head blood everywhere

Ahh is that why everyone calls you half tadger todd"

That my excuse for its size

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By *ab fem OP   Woman 4 weeks ago

Ayrshire


"Woman took a chunk out my knob while giving me head blood everywhere

Ahh is that why everyone calls you half tadger todd

That my excuse for its size "

Oh must be even smaller now then

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By *addys Fairy PrincessWoman 4 weeks ago

aberdeen


"Banjo string "

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By *luebell888Woman 4 weeks ago

Glasgow

Its not painful but a couple of times i have burst a blood vessel under my tongue which turns it black. Got a fright the first time i saw it but soon realised how it happened.

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By *ab fem OP   Woman 4 weeks ago

Ayrshire


"Its not painful but a couple of times i have burst a blood vessel under my tongue which turns it black. Got a fright the first time i saw it but soon realised how it happened."

Jeez how did you do that?

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By *ason Todd100Man 4 weeks ago

Gotham City


"Woman took a chunk out my knob while giving me head blood everywhere

Ahh is that why everyone calls you half tadger todd

That my excuse for its size

Comes with a magnifying glass

Oh must be even smaller now then "

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By *ldie but goodyWoman 4 weeks ago

lanarkshire


"Woman took a chunk out my knob while giving me head blood everywhere "
where there's blame there's a claim...just saying

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By *oggy1970Couple 4 weeks ago

Glasgow


"Its not painful but a couple of times i have burst a blood vessel under my tongue which turns it black. Got a fright the first time i saw it but soon realised how it happened.

Jeez how did you do that? "

Mind blowing suction I imagine!

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By *ab fem OP   Woman 4 weeks ago

Ayrshire


"Its not painful but a couple of times i have burst a blood vessel under my tongue which turns it black. Got a fright the first time i saw it but soon realised how it happened.

Jeez how did you do that?

Mind blowing suction I imagine!"

I have a vision of a wee shrivelled up ball sack now

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By *ason Todd100Man 4 weeks ago

Gotham City


"Woman took a chunk out my knob while giving me head blood everywhere where there's blame there's a claim...just saying "

Do you think the injury lawyers for you off the telly would take the case or should I ask the lawyers on the job thread for advice

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By *utdooryoneMan 4 weeks ago

stirling

Cramp has intervened before. Ow.

Quick way of 'deflating' too...

I've also stung myself on nettles once.

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By *luebell888Woman 4 weeks ago

Glasgow


"Its not painful but a couple of times i have burst a blood vessel under my tongue which turns it black. Got a fright the first time i saw it but soon realised how it happened.

Jeez how did you do that?

Mind blowing suction I imagine!

I have a vision of a wee shrivelled up ball sack now "

Not so much suction more wriggling my tongue around at funny angles very fast.

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By *hortyscotWoman 4 weeks ago

glasgow

A particularly erm, vigorous session ended abruptly when I got a sharp pain in my cervix and started bleeding profusely. Nothing serious, thankfully!

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By *eef-talkingMan 4 weeks ago

fife

Have had the banjo string cut for obvious reasons

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By *oolsGoldxWoman 4 weeks ago

Glasgow

I have a few wee bruises just now.. I bruise easily tho and it was worth it x

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By *ortland51Man 4 weeks ago

Glasgow


"I have a few wee bruises just now.. I bruise easily tho and it was worth it x"

I get that look sometimes after just a night out! I'm sure someone beats me in my sleep when I get home!

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By *r Costa xxMan 4 weeks ago

stirling

I once had my ego bruised, does that count?

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By *stonDB11Man 4 weeks ago

Kirkcaldy

skin scraped off my nose from base of hard edged basque. Not drawing a picture of how thats poss, lol

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By *r Luva LuvaMan 4 weeks ago

Ayrshire/Glasgow

Channel 5 now that hurts !!!!

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By *rMrsWTFCouple 4 weeks ago

Arbroath

I once smashed my face of the bedside table not only did I I have a cut and a black eye the glass top slid off and smashed

This was in a hotel room where I worked so I had to come up with an excuse for my face whilst being shocked that customer had broke their bedside table

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By *ab fem OP   Woman 4 weeks ago

Ayrshire


"I once had my ego bruised, does that count? "

Yep that will do. It can hurt just as much

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By *ab fem OP   Woman 4 weeks ago

Ayrshire


"I once smashed my face of the bedside table not only did I I have a cut and a black eye the glass top slid off and smashed

This was in a hotel room where I worked so I had to come up with an excuse for my face whilst being shocked that customer had broke their bedside table"

Did they believe you when you were standing there with your face all battered?

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By *timewasterMan 4 weeks ago

greenock

Can't think of anything that's led to any injuries, but I did have a nosebleed once when I was 'downtown' one day.

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By *ameraguy73Man 4 weeks ago

Paisley

Foreskin caught in zip of zippy PVC briefs as partner quickly unzipped them with gusto!

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By *rMrsWTFCouple 4 weeks ago

Arbroath


"I once smashed my face of the bedside table not only did I I have a cut and a black eye the glass top slid off and smashed

This was in a hotel room where I worked so I had to come up with an excuse for my face whilst being shocked that customer had broke their bedside table

Did they believe you when you were standing there with your face all battered? "

I think so they must have done I would've been sacked otherwise

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By *rewMacMan 4 weeks ago

glasgow


"Have you ever hurt yourself during sex, what happened? "

No but in 1997 I almost died during sex. Her husband came home early but I was faster than the big slug.

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By *ab fem OP   Woman 4 weeks ago

Ayrshire


"Have you ever hurt yourself during sex, what happened?

No but in 1997 I almost died during sex. Her husband came home early but I was faster than the big slug. "

I have visions of you jumping out a window in your boxers

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By *rewMacMan 4 weeks ago

glasgow


"Have you ever hurt yourself during sex, what happened?

No but in 1997 I almost died during sex. Her husband came home early but I was faster than the big slug.

I have visions of you jumping out a window in your boxers "

Almost. It was out the patio doors and over onto Bothwell Castle golf course. It’s hard doing the walk of shame in a suit ON A GOLF COURSE.

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By *adbury girlWoman 4 weeks ago

Lanarkshire


"Have you ever hurt yourself during sex, what happened?

No but in 1997 I almost died during sex. Her husband came home early but I was faster than the big slug.

I have visions of you jumping out a window in your boxers

Almost. It was out the patio doors and over onto Bothwell Castle golf course. It’s hard doing the walk of shame in a suit ON A GOLF COURSE. "

Was it worth it though

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By *luebell888Woman 4 weeks ago

Glasgow


"Have you ever hurt yourself during sex, what happened?

No but in 1997 I almost died during sex. Her husband came home early but I was faster than the big slug.

I have visions of you jumping out a window in your boxers

Almost. It was out the patio doors and over onto Bothwell Castle golf course. It’s hard doing the walk of shame in a suit ON A GOLF COURSE. "

Birthday suit?

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By *ittyrougeWoman 4 weeks ago

Fife


"Semen in the eye is the worst so far....thankfully.

Stings like a mammy pumper, doesn't it.

You need jizz goggles. You'll never get pink eye again with those bad boys

Is this another item in your basic blow job kit....along with your gobble bobble? . I like a woman who's prepared!"

I’ve not heard gobble bobble for ages! Thanks for this, made me proper belly laugh x

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By *ndyEdinMan 4 weeks ago

Edinburgh

Lots but thats cause I has doing it after major abdominal surgery and would be broken for 3/4 days after but totally worth it.

Did also cum so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye.

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By *timewasterMan 4 weeks ago

greenock


"Lots but thats cause I has doing it after major abdominal surgery and would be broken for 3/4 days after but totally worth it.

Did also cum so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. "

Japs?

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By *ndyEdinMan 4 weeks ago

Edinburgh


"Lots but thats cause I has doing it after major abdominal surgery and would be broken for 3/4 days after but totally worth it.

Did also cum so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye.

Japs?

Nope optical

"

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By *rewMacMan 3 weeks ago

glasgow


"Have you ever hurt yourself during sex, what happened?

No but in 1997 I almost died during sex. Her husband came home early but I was faster than the big slug.

I have visions of you jumping out a window in your boxers

Almost. It was out the patio doors and over onto Bothwell Castle golf course. It’s hard doing the walk of shame in a suit ON A GOLF COURSE.

Birthday suit?"

No, thankfully it was just a two piece

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By *oggy1970Couple 3 weeks ago

Glasgow


"Lots but thats cause I has doing it after major abdominal surgery and would be broken for 3/4 days after but totally worth it.

Did also cum so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. "

Jesus, Mary and Joseph.....that one must have blown your socks off too!

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By *esssDanMan 3 weeks ago

Dundee

Glad I am not the only one who is admitting to cramp - backs of the legs tightening right up during shifting positions. Especially if it's cold in the room also...

;(

Doesn't happen often, but it's an embarrassing bugger.

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By *ldie but goodyWoman 3 weeks ago

lanarkshire

Oh hell cramp in your legs is a buggar To get

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By *low HandsMan 3 weeks ago

Dundee

Was at a house party for this grannys 80th, met the 18 year old grand daughter in the bathroom, i was 18 too at the time...

The sex was great, but her old man took a disliking to me when the door opened and he was in the queue. The burst nose healed well, hahaha

It was worth it tho, hahaha

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By *rettyflowerCouple 3 weeks ago

Glasgow

Mrs Prettyflower was enjoying herself a bit to much while ‘on top’. Nearly snapped Mr _rettyflower’s cock. Was a very large bruise for a couple of weeks. The lols!

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By (user no longer on site) 3 weeks ago

Snap my banjo string not good was so painful

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By *olly90Woman 3 weeks ago

Arbroath

Aye guys who are too big and don't ease me in... hurts like hell and extremely off putting

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By *ucyfur77Woman 3 weeks ago

G.U.Y


"Semen in the eye is the worst so far....thankfully.

Stings like a mammy pumper, doesn't it.

You need jizz goggles. You'll never get pink eye again with those bad boys

Is this another item in your basic blow job kit....along with your gobble bobble? . I like a woman who's prepared!

Fail to prepare, prepare to fail.

That's my expert cock handler kit. I've got gobble bobbles, jizz goggles, family sized tub of vaseline, cock rings, vibrating cock rings, cock cages, penis beakers and polo mints. Not forgetting the condoms of many sizes of course

Penis beaker! "

I thought it said breaker

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