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Can you ever go back?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Should an ex always stay an ex, no exceptions?
Do you have that certain person for who it always felt like it shouldn’t have ended?
The one where circumstances were the thing that got in the way?
Met them too soon? |
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I made that mistake once Rachel and never ever again.
There is a very long and nasty story to it all but it has made me vow never ever to go near an ex again, I like my life and being alive too much  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I made that mistake once Rachel and never ever again.
There is a very long and nasty story to it all but it has made me vow never ever to go near an ex again, I like my life and being alive too much "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It can be the luck of the draw I suppose. I know a couple of separate couples who broke up a long time ago then after quite some time, got back together again and they are both together all those years later - whether or not they are happy or just putting up with each other, only they know. 5 years ago I left my wife, not for anyone else or anything shady, and we were apart for almost a year then got back together - it worked ok for just over a year but we broke up again after that time. Nobody was to blame, we simply did not get along together anymore, which was a shame because August gone would have been our 16th wedding anniversary. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I had 3 years with a FWB which ended badly. It was a very serious relationship in the end. But had to end. We also work together and my managers now have said cut all ties with her. |
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I met a girl on here 3 years ago and we both feel in love and came off fab to be together sadly it ended earlier this year and cut me up badly and would welcome get back in a heartbeat. I would never say never in life but you also do have to let go other wise it eats up up inside |
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I think there is always a reason that they became an ex. That reason won’t go away, it may hide for a while, but it’ll come back in the end and they’ll be an ex again with all the heartache that entails repeated. |
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I think it depends on the nature of the relationship. Some will work a second time round (I can think of good examples of this being the case), other not (I can think of equally good examples).
Depends on the people and circumstances in my opinion.
Statistics I would imagine would be against you, however. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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They should stay an ex. I took one back after 15 years. It lasted 5 years. He left me for someone else. Stole money from me. During the 5 years he beat me several times.
Ex's are Ex's for a reason |
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I'm a firm believer that relationships have a shelf life. Relationships change as they mature or as the individuals in them have different experiences on their journey.
I think that Baz Luhrmann says it best:
"Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't.
Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't.
Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the 'Funky Chicken' on your 75th wedding anniversary.
Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either.
Your choices are half chance, so are everybody else's." |
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I couldn’t never go back to my ex, one of my ex’s cheated on me and if I ever went back they would probably cheat on me again.
I did date one of my ex’s once, let’s just say never again I regret it so bad |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was always told never to go back. I did once and it was a huge mistake. I should of listened but thought I knew best and got my heart broken in the process. Learnt my lesson and wouldn't dream of doing it again, once it's done, it's done. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I had an ex of mine come down and stay with me for a few days through the summer. She is the mother of my eldest son and she cheated on me 20 years ago which caused the relationship to end. We always stayed in touch as after all we have a child together. So anyway we were chatting and I agreed for her to come spend some time at mine as she was having a rough time of it. She lives 70 miles away so not like popping round for a cuppa and seeing if I could help out. Over the course of that weekend it became apparent from our conversations that she hadn't changed one bit from the cheat she was 20 years ago, so in my opinion in circumstances like that then yes an ex should remain an ex. |
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Technically Mrs Crazy is an ex. We tried when we were in our early 20’s but I (mr) was away in the army a lot.
Fast forward a few years and we made another go of it. Been happily married seven years now. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There's a reason there an ex I saw my ex a few days ago in Tesco and went to the next isle hoping he didn't see me lol there's only one I regret being a ex and wish I worked harder on the relationship but I was young |
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By *killsMan
over a year ago
Never Never Land |
We are all to quick to forget the bad times and just remember the good. No matter how hard or painful it was, we split for a reason. To forget all that had passed is to forget a valuable life lesson. You will never move forward if you are always looking backwards. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I suppose it all depends on the circumstances for splitting up I guess. If it was an amicable split because of circumstances and there was never any bad blood etc then I can’t see why not |
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I am on good terms with my exes and socialise with several. What was special about them often remains, a relationship running it's course doesn't always negate that.
I've played with one ex a few times at clubs, and gone on holidays with another. I wouldn't pursue a full on relationship with any exes, but several remain important parts of my life, and I of theirs. |
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"Should an ex always stay an ex, no exceptions?
Do you have that certain person for who it always felt like it shouldn’t have ended?
The one where circumstances were the thing that got in the way?
Met them too soon? "
i know exactly what you mean,split with mine 2yrs ago nobody else involved and yet we were both totally in love??..love is a strange thing! lol  |
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I have two that I'd happily revisit. They're exes because of circumstances, not because there were any issues between us.
The rest of them I wouldn't want to go back to as there were good reasons why things ended. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think people make a valid case in terms of it depends on circumstances.
Me and my ex (mother of my 2 children) gave it another go for a couple of months in the summer, after 18 months apart. But we slipped back into old ways within the first couple of weeks and it didn’t last.
I always think of Einstein’s quote when getting back with an ex now.
“Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I probably given mine more chance than I should of expecting to be better but it never does & it just leaves you heartbroken all over again Saturday being the last chance so now yes a ex should remain an ex I can’t do it anymore to myself |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I probably given mine more chance than I should of expecting to be better but it never does & it just leaves you heartbroken all over again Saturday being the last chance so now yes a ex should remain an ex I can’t do it anymore to myself "
I am guilty of this, 1 chance is certainly 1 chance too many yet with my ex-wife i foolishly tried 3 times  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I probably given mine more chance than I should of expecting to be better but it never does & it just leaves you heartbroken all over again Saturday being the last chance so now yes a ex should remain an ex I can’t do it anymore to myself
I am guilty of this, 1 chance is certainly 1 chance too many yet with my ex-wife i foolishly tried 3 times "
onwards and up now  |
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I think it depends on the relationship. My ex wife is an absolute flat no because she tried to ruin my life.
There are a couple of women we parted with on good terms and had a fling with afterwards and were good experiences. Luke |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes... circumstances got in the way with a gorgeous guy I was once in a relationship with...he was gorgeous in every way...but distance became an obstacle unfortunately due to his work location...we lost total contact with each other too as I moved address & it was in a time before mobile phones or internet...yup he was the one that got away...I often reminise & I've searched for him online to no avail unfortunately... |
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"They are an ex for a reason.
If you split you are more likely to split again in the future.
I honestly only know 1 couple who split that ended up back together. "
Depends why you broke up. If someone "cheated" or betrayed you then no. If your loves drifted apart they can come back together if the circumstances are right |
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Never go back, but i didn't always think like that. Have some very fond memories of 4 exes when i was a serial monogamist in my teens and 20s, and can still recall the strong sexual feelings and emotions at the time as if they were yesterday. Do wonder "what if" from time to time and remember the great sex, but oddly enough only with the ones i broke up with, not the ones that broke up with me!! But wouldn't go back; new memories with new people still to be made! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Split with my ex over 12mths ago now totally due to situations outside our control we've tried 3 times to rekindle it but everytime things that happened to cause us to split gets dragged back up and we end up splitting so no I don't think it does work |
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After a holiday romance we spent 25 years separated by the Pennines and circumstances,but when we reconnected it was was like we had never been apart , married now and living our best lives ,older ,wiser and definitely happier .
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