FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Deleting messages etiquette
Deleting messages etiquette
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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We often chat with people with lots of messages flying back and forth. Then when we've met or played we find most or all of the messages we sent have been deleted.
What would you make of it? We're paranoid about not deleting messages in case people think we've lost interest.
Are we reading too much into it? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We often chat with people with lots of messages flying back and forth. Then when we've met or played we find most or all of the messages we sent have been deleted.
What would you make of it? We're paranoid about not deleting messages in case people think we've lost interest.
Are we reading too much into it?"
Yes you are over thinking things. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We often chat with people with lots of messages flying back and forth. Then when we've met or played we find most or all of the messages we sent have been deleted.
What would you make of it? We're paranoid about not deleting messages in case people think we've lost interest.
Are we reading too much into it?"
If you dont delete some it takes ages to sort back through  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I read and delete every message once I've read it. I don't think there is a specific etiquette to it all, but as I never look in my sent mail, I wouldn't know if someone has read, not read or deleted anything I've sent. |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"I delete a message as soon as I've replied to it."
I delete most of mine without reading them at all
To the OP, as I don't usually meet more than once I find deleting messages the best thing to do. No point in them hanging around when there's more people to meet. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I tend to save messages then get rid of them from my in box so it may look like it's deleted but it's still there.
I have to admit I delete my sent messages quite often so I have no idea if the recipient keeps or deletes them.
Best not to worry too much about it! |
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By *hortieWoman
over a year ago
Northampton |
"I delete a message as soon as I've replied to it.
I delete most of mine without reading them at all
To the OP, as I don't usually meet more than once I find deleting messages the best thing to do. No point in them hanging around when there's more people to meet. "
I keep messages for a while if i think there is something there. messages are also the best way for me to find their profile, cause i'm horrendous at remembering their username  so i just go down the messages looking for their profile pic :P
i can see the message chain history from any message in that chain, so useless having more than one bit for every message.
If I were on the ball I'd put some messages as saved lol, but always tend to keep the important ones like meet times / contact details
yes - you're worrying too much about it  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We often chat with people with lots of messages flying back and forth. Then when we've met or played we find most or all of the messages we sent have been deleted.
What would you make of it? We're paranoid about not deleting messages in case people think we've lost interest.
Are we reading too much into it?"
Yes you are,some people delete all messages as soon as they're read or sent
Others like me have a mass clear out everynow and then,its not a personal thing at all so don't worry,when they stop replying is when they have lost interest |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We're paranoid about not deleting messages in case people think we've lost interest."
Oh my goodness! Is that what you think when you see your messages deleted? I hope not! People are not their messages, the messages are just a tool.
Personally I hate deleting messages but the way the inbox is set up on this site I have to regularly cull convos in order to get to the ones that have scrolled off. I've yet to find a way that works for me. I sometimes glance to see what others do (with mine) and have seen those that delete immediately, those that delete some keep some, and those that don't delete at all. So I know there's no extra meaning in keeping or deleting, it's just communications management |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We often chat with people with lots of messages flying back and forth. Then when we've met or played we find most or all of the messages we sent have been deleted.
What would you make of it? We're paranoid about not deleting messages in case people think we've lost interest.
Are we reading too much into it?"
Probably reading too much into it if people have issues over you deleting then they are probably a bit over sensitive. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I delete them as soon as I've replied. The supporters feed shows message history and anything with a phone number or face pic I save then delete from my inbox. I like a nice tidy inbox |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We often chat with people with lots of messages flying back and forth. Then when we've met or played we find most or all of the messages we sent have been deleted.
What would you make of it? We're paranoid about not deleting messages in case people think we've lost interest.
Are we reading too much into it?"
Save one so the Convo history is saved delete the rest is a good option if it still works.
Fabs does have the most outdated and appealing message system though.
Having to delete messages just so you can see older ones is just silly |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If someone I was chatting to deleted my messages I'd think he was either not interested or was married or had a partner and was scared old messages would link him to someone in other words a slimy cheating bugger I expect my messages to be kept for eternity !!! And if deleted I'd not bother sending any more !!
I'm not just after a bit of fun though . |
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We save messages with photos that we want to keep and other important details.
Otherwise we delete all messages as soon as we have both read them. Never considered that this may offend people, but maybe they are looking for more than we are in that case.
We rarely check whether our messages have been read and /or deleted. If people want to reply to our last message they will. If not we wouldn't push for a reply so tend not to keep sent messages either. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I have a string of messages I normally delete all except the most recent.
With friends I will often delete all fairly quickly...I can easily message again..or in many cases just text em as I have swapped numbers with most.
No real etiquette tbh. Some people just save space. Once it's read it's read or dealt with.
Delete without reading May be seen as ignorant - but really it often just a lazy way of saying "no thanks"? |
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By *umourCouple
over a year ago
Northants |
We don't always use the Site Supporters thing, just when we think about it. If we delete messages, they are gone for good!
Like the OP, we also think about why people have deleted our messages just after we sent them, surely people want to be able to refer to what they said? We do! There have been quite a few times when we have just not typed again, because we thought that either they didn't like our pictures or they had decided not to to pursue it any further for another reason. 
All those people who we may have been able to meet, some really nice ones too.. Oh the shame of it..  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We delete all but the last message in a thread so that each other can see the conversation
I have to say, we do use deleting messages with people we're not interested in as a way of drawing the communication to a close... |
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"We often chat with people with lots of messages flying back and forth. Then when we've met or played we find most or all of the messages we sent have been deleted.
What would you make of it? We're paranoid about not deleting messages in case people think we've lost interest.
Are we reading too much into it?"
yes you are we delete messages to keep things tidy lol  |
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