FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Those of you who don't or aren't looking to swing....

Those of you who don't or aren't looking to swing....

By *xstephbxx OP Couple over a year ago

hyde

Errrmmmm...why are you here ?

Noticed there seems to be an increase of people on here, men women and couples who " aren't looking to meet at the mo ".

There is a marvelous function on here called " Hide profile "..

It works absolute wonders and helps the rest of us to trawl through the "wanna be's"...the "i wish ", and the of course, " if only's !",,

I only say this because a certain couple has been messaging us for ages then when we finally got around to arranging something, they told us they didn't actually swing, they just liked the fantasy of it all...

Now i don't mind this, fantasy is 99% of the reason we are all here, some however actually go the other 1% and enter what we know as "swinging !".

I ask only this of those who read this that you state clearly, and yes you can use cap's. To say if you are actually looking to meet !!!

Thankyou Martyn & Steph x-x-x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

At the risk of an onslaught ...

Your profile says you aren't looking to meet - albeit short term.

"2/11/09 Gonna take a few weeks break folks... need to get sorted for xmas and you all just distract us !!..

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By *xstephbxx OP Couple over a year ago

hyde

OH CRAP !!...LOL...ermm...i ...ermm...lol.. well.....ermm...( told that tosser to change it ! )....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm not meeting but see no need to hide my profile... why would I?

My friends would wonder why if I hid as has happened in the past when I have done.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"OH CRAP !!...LOL...ermm...i ...ermm...lol.. well.....ermm...( told that tosser to change it ! )...."

PMSL!!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Just more timewasters, don't let it get you down it's par for the course and we are all just going to have to accept it as part of the internet swinging scene.

We just had a couple mail us wanting to meet tonight, we asked to see pictures of both of them and instead of attaching them to thier mails we had to put them on our friends list to view them, this done we said yes happy to meet tonight which is what they had asked us to do, then - nothing, total timewasters, they obviously wanted to see our private pics (silly cos we dont have any but they either didnt notice that or they just want lots of names on thier friends list.

So are we bovvered, do we look bovvered, nah its just another name for our block list and at least we have made someone happy tonight, now they can look impressive with another "friend"

Sad people and if we can make thier fantasy come true life ain't so bad, and after all it is Christmas

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

We just noticed that...

Do agree tho and it is a busy time for kids,familys ect..

But,can't understand why someone would put a post up like that when they have got the same on their profile when the OP Is obviously saying that everyone who has that on their profiles are timewasters??

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"We just noticed that...

Do agree tho and it is a busy time for kids,familys ect..

Think the OP made a genuine mistake.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

People can hide their profile for a variety of reasons - personally we have it hidden at the mo because we are quite happy just meeting with friends on here and want to stay in contact with them, read the forums and we arent really interested in meeting anyone new at the mo - personally we think its a great feature

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By *atisfy janeWoman over a year ago

Torquay

To be perfectly honest I don't much bother what other people do with their profiles, all this 'outing' of people as timewasters is pointless in my opinion.

All I care about is what fun I have, couldn't give a toss if 75% of the members on here are so called 'timewasters'.....it's the fun that I have or potentially have with the other 25% is all that matters to me.

It can get very bitter on these forums about those amongst us that don't fit in with the 'normal' way of swinging...who sets these swingers standards?....and are they qualified to do so?

Maybe these experts should write a swingers guide?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 06/12/09 23:02:12]

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By *ohjaneCouple over a year ago

south staffs

@ Satisfy Jane

Well said, that lady.

I often wonder at the folks getting down on singles -mostly men, but also women - as not being swingers, or not "being able to swing". How could we greedy girls play if we didn't have the singles on the site ?

Hugs to all

Jane x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

aye but jane we aint SINGLES hun we is SWINGLES sounds better lol. and so many fem of the couples are bi, so FEMALE SWINGLES do come in handy lol. I have never had anyone waste my time, and I believe as long as i and my mates are having fun, who plays, who wants a break, their business not mine lol. lets all have fun

oops course the regular whingers cant have any fun cos they always whinging.

have a good week ppl

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

free country..... just cause your profile active it doesnt mean you not meeting it may be you very selective of who you meeting. as a single fem i can understand why some people dont meet or put not meeting due to the volume of mail you can receive. at the end of the day it it each to their own! there will always be timewasters in every aspect of life sometimes peoples nose gets out of joint when things dont go the way they planned but such is life xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

One of the main attractions of Fab is its social aspect. Hence I am here, even though I have a handful of playmates to keep me busy.

If someone exceptional that tickles my fancy offers me an offer I cannot refuse, I am not going to say no!

Now where is Ahab so that I can bite his pert botty!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

And the reason I do not hide my profile, what's the point, I have nothing to hide, and I kind of like to show off my pics!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"OH CRAP !!...LOL...ermm...i ...ermm...lol.. well.....ermm...( told that tosser to change it ! )...."

lol, egg on face....

Should you not have hidden your profile.

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

"To be perfectly honest I don't much bother what other people do with their profiles, all this 'outing' of people as timewasters is pointless in my opinion.

It can get very bitter on these forums about those amongst us that don't fit in with the 'normal' way of swinging...who sets these swingers standards?....and are they qualified to do so?

Maybe these experts should write a swingers guide?"

Totally agree with your post.

There are certainly some people who think they decide the standards and rules of what is expected if you are on this site.

We don't fit into the normal swinging situation and from the comments being made on the forums we wouldn't know wether we should call ourselves swingers or not.

But to be honest, when we joined the site, it didn't say on the registration page " you must swing 9 times a month" you must not have cyber" you must not play on cam even if you want to " you must play with a couple and not a single male" it just said register to join.

So we take no notice of the "elite " swingers who say we shouldn't be here because we don't fit into their catergory or do things their way.

To the OP , lots of people, like yourself, have breaks from playing. Some at times ( like us)put a note now and then on the profile when we have enough playmates to sort through before asking for anymore, or just want to play with the meets we have played with before.

There are lots of reasons why.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Just because people are not meeting at the moment doesn't mean they wont be

So maybe that's the reason they choose not to hide their profile

Cant see what the big deal is really anyway

Les had a rather nasty and aggressive email off a single male on her single profile the other day

Calling her all the names under the sun cause she had not meeting at the moment on her profile

Sad isn't it

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Doesn't matter to me, there are all sorts of people on here who are into many a varied interests, live and let live and you can always just stick to your friends, no pun intended well just a little then

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Oh not again, why not start a different topic like “why do some people let swinging take over their lives”

Yes we all agree there’s people out there who has no intensions of ever meeting anyone, but there’s also people new and curious who’ll most probably be put off ever taking it any further due to the pushiness of some, and the attitude of “if your not meeting right now or available 24/7 or ever dare to change your mind” leave the site or hide your profile certainly doesn’t help.

Some people just take what should be a bit of fun and enjoyment far too seriously; maybe we’re just too chilled for our own good, but if we get let down, we just enjoy the free time away from the kids and make a night of it ourselves, it’s a win win situation, obviously that’s not an option for singles, but cannot see why any couple cannot make the best of a bad situation when they have each other, unless of course they’re so hung up on swinging their own partners are forgotten about.

This post is not directed towards the OP, its generally aimed towards what swinging has now become, too many people with the attitude of “our way is the correct way” what ever happened to no means no? yes its still around, but the timewaster tag then gets thrown into the mix if they take a little time to make that decision.

There's just to much pressure put on people to meet nowadays, its supposed to be fun, people will meet when they're ready, and thats the way it should always be.

Feel free to flame

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

very well said risky and frisky.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"very well said risky and frisky.

100% Agree... perfectly said!

If it or someone doesn't suit, move on... So what??

Especially the No means NO bit...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

** applauds frisky n risky** thank you for the voice of reason, like a breath of fresh air sweeping through the forums xxx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Oh not again, why not start a different topic like “why do some people let swinging take over their lives”

There's just to much pressure put on people to meet nowadays, its supposed to be fun, people will meet when they're ready, and thats the way it should always be.

Feel free to flame

big round of applause u just totally summed it up!!!!!xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

There's lots of them,.....talk talk talk talk ..what they want to do and how!!

Boring Boring !!

Get an with it and meet or piss off..lol

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By *i 1 Get 1 FreeCouple (MM) over a year ago

birmingham

"Get an with it and meet or piss off..lol

lol

Although we do agree with you

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By *rouble and strifeCouple over a year ago

Nr Glasgow

is this not friends reunited??????????

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I think before this question is answered we need to know what is a swinger????

Different people will have different interpretations.

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By *uckscouple2007Couple over a year ago

Bucks

was a couple in chat yday trying to chat up a single fem, asking her "do you meet couples" .. yet when you looked at their profile it read "mr has hung up his swinging boots, only mrs playing"

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By *umourCouple over a year ago

Northants

Can fully understand the ethos of "people will meet when they are ready" but we know of at least two couples and some single guys who have absolutely no intention of meeting anyone! Although the profile reads like they are the answer to your swinging prayers, they just want the "buzz" of talking the talk to others!

Now, correct me if I am wrong, but this is a swingers site and by their very nature, swingers meet other swingers! If not, they are NOT swingers! At very least, people who just want to talk about it should be up front about it...

Loads of people on here complain about timewasters, well there they are!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Can fully understand the ethos of "people will meet when they are ready" but we know of at least two couples and some single guys who have absolutely no intention of meeting anyone! Although the profile reads like they are the answer to your swinging prayers, they just want the "buzz" of talking the talk to others!

Loads of people on here complain about timewasters, well there they are!

Yes, don't have a problem with folk who for one reason or another are never going to meet.

My problem is with the plonkers who say all the right things on their profile, but have no intention of ever meeting. Why can't they just be honest and upfront about it?

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By *harpDressed ManMan over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"There's lots of them,.....talk talk talk talk ..what they want to do and how!!

Boring Boring !!

Get an with it and meet or piss off..lol

Come on then, where & when?

(worth a try...!)

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By *umourCouple over a year ago

Northants

"We met on Fab ... We are not looking to Swap .. Maybe swap the odd e-mail ... We go to Libert Elite together ... great club ..

Just found this profile and thought it was a good example of how it should be done if all you want is to talk! I can't figure what they are doing on here but at least they not time wasters.

Do have one thought, they met on Fab so one assumes they were on here to meet others, but now they will not? "Each to their own" is a given, but what do you think about it?

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By *xstephbxx OP Couple over a year ago

hyde

At the end of the day, this site is called fab swingers... Not fab talkers !...

I'm not saying that everyone are talkers, cause they certainly aren't !!. Just seems there are few people on here who are here just to chat about sex, which is fine, probably the best place to do it actually, just would be a lot easier if right at the top of their profile ( perhaps in the heading ) "Here just to chat for now thanks". Stops al the confusion and wasted messages etc.

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By *obbytupperMan over a year ago

Menston near Ilkley

"At the end of the day, this site is called fab swingers... Not fab talkers !...

Oh bugger! I thought it was Fabsingers, just been practising too!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

had a few guys thats looking to meet one on one but not looking to party or married men into quick fumbles and to sneek around not into that am here to party with genuine people.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Some people shouldn't believe everything they think.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

i work full time, have non swinging friends to socialise with swinging comes when I want to. No pressure, just now and then, i pays me money and enjoy the site, the chat, the socials, and my meets are my business I dont advertise sex meets he he. A lot of us are so busy with our normal lives swinging is a relaxing past time. And that is it a pastime a hobby not a way of life for all of us, we are all different.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Some people shouldn't believe everything they think."

I certainly agree with that, so many times I see opinion passed off as actual fact, it can be quite laughable at times.

talking in general, not aimed particularly at anything on this thread.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

To me the problem isnt people who dont meet.

Its people who say they are active and going to meet and then dont.

Every other thread on here is about no shows/bull5hitters and fantasists either not turning up or letting folks down.

Agree with Steph that having a clear message would help.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Just more timewasters, don't let it get you down it's par for the course and we are all just going to have to accept it as part of the internet swinging scene.

"
ask them to send the friend invite...

add them as friends when they go off line...

that way if you dont like them you can delete them and they dont get to see your pics even if you did have some...lol...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

add them as friends when they go off line...

that way if you dont like them you can delete them and they dont get to see your pics even if you did have some...lol...

We've been bombarded with Friends Invites from people who are either too stupid to read or just too lazy to write anything for ages. The past fortnight we've had literally dozens, many from single fems oddly enough.

The other day I re-wrote part of our profile to say that anyone who sent us a Friends Invite without an introduction first would get the above treatment... It's kinda working but there's still a few morons.

Thinking of changing it again to something along the lines of "We will accept when you go offline, save your photos then assemble them into a slideshow and post it on Youporn.com, THEN delete you before you see ours".

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

always worth a try...lol

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By *aucy3Couple over a year ago

glasgow

no matter how often you swing.once a year,once a month,once a week,whatever.swinging means you have sex with other people.everybody will probably take a break,now and again.it is not feasable to fancy everyone,but if sooner, or later, you dont have some kind of sex, with other people.you are not a swinger.why join a swingers site.

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By *obblybitsCouple over a year ago

huddersfield

the only people I view as time wasters are people who are not realy or people who lead you on and then nothing even this can be circumstancial to the indevidual. everyone is after difrent things. I have come across people who don't want to swing but actuly like people viewing there profile as they like people to see there pictures or see them on cam.

everyone is difrent, thats why I wouldnt judge because there not meeting

michelle

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Well I must admit I am no gladiator or george clooney lookalike so can guarantee I only swing with the minority here though often feel the peeps I do want to meet and want to meet me live miles away!!!!!Does not help either the fact I have to work on saturday till 6pm and really am shattered that night.

GET THE BLACKPOOL SWINGING SCENE UP AND RUNNING IS MY MOTTO FOR 2010!!!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Was on here as a 'swingle' for quite a while, had some amazing times, met some fabulous people and made some great friends.

Then fate took a hand and I met 'the one', (yes on here !!!) at the moment we are a new 'couple' we have decided not to play for the time being as we learn about eachother and build what I hope will be a strong relationship between US. Should we decide in the future to play as a couple we will re-write our profile but for now it clearly says WE ARE ONLY HERE TO CHAT ON THE FORUMS - WE ARE NOT MEETING. I don't want to hide the profile as I like my pictures and I like using my status neither of which I could do without the profile being 'live'.

As I said we both have many very very good friends on the forums and this is a great way to keep in touch, share thoughts, have a laugh and get support - just because my situation has changed and I am not meeting for now, I don't think I should be made to feel like I don't belong here any more.

One of the great things about this site in particular is the social side of it and I'm not prepared to walk away from that just because I only want to talk.

So whether people like it or not Furry and Boots are here to chat and we'll catch you in the forums............. xxx

xxx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Well said Raz, the fact is that this site is used by different people for different reasons, and as long as no rules are broken, the site management are obviously happy for the status quo to continue.

As has been said a load of times, there isn't even a definitive meaning for 'swinging', so it's simply peoples' opinions which are fine as long as they are kept as opinions. The problems come when some folk get on their high horses and think their opinion is the correct and only one, which of course it seldom is!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Perhaps its reverse phycology that if they say they dont want to meet they gets loads of requests to meet ..rather than saying they want to meet and get nothing but timewasters...!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Perhaps its reverse phycology that if they say they dont want to meet they gets loads of requests to meet ..rather than saying they want to meet and get nothing but timewasters...!!

"
well if you look at our profile i really dont think it could be any clearer lol but if you saw our in box ! Lol x

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By *aucy3Couple over a year ago

glasgow

"Well said Raz, the fact is that this site is used by different people for different reasons, and as long as no rules are broken, the site management are obviously happy for the status quo to continue.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"can i ask ,when you thought of joining a swingers site.what did you think swinging involved. a wee bit of carpentry perhaps.

Ehhhh.......... and your point is??

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By *aucy3Couple over a year ago

glasgow

"can i ask ,when you thought of joining a swingers site.what did you think swinging involved. a wee bit of carpentry perhaps.

Ehhhh.......... and your point is??

"
was that to hard.its a question.i asked the question,see above.you give the answer.

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By *umourCouple over a year ago

Northants

The long and the short of it is this.. If you do not intend to meet others for some kind of sexual encounter, you are not a swinger and are perhaps in the wrong place!

There are so many people on here who don't want to meet, I wonder if they would be here if they had to pay for the privilege? I think not and that to me is the measure of whether people are on the right site. So come on, shoot me down if you can, but the facts are this!

1. This is a swingers site!

2. Swingers meet other for sex!

3. To be a swinger you need to participate!

4. To participate, you need to meet people.

But I suppose with that old chestnut "Each to their own" Someone is bound to say that it is OK for non swingers to dilute the pool! Makes it harder to find genuine people though...

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By *atisfy janeWoman over a year ago

Torquay

How profound was that last post?

So glad that I am now aware of who the swinging experts are on the site....

Can sleep well tonight knowing I am in the company of such wisdom

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple over a year ago

Bolton

"The long and the short of it is this.. If you do not intend to meet others for some kind of sexual encounter, you are not a swinger and are perhaps in the wrong place!

1. This is a swingers site!

2. Swingers meet other for sex!

3. To be a swinger you need to participate!

4. To participate, you need to meet people.

But I suppose with that old chestnut "Each to their own" Someone is bound to say that it is OK for non swingers to dilute the pool! Makes it harder to find genuine people though...

In what way do the people who aren't meeting at the moment dilute the pool? There are several, they make it known usualy on their profiles, they contribute in the forums, perhaps go to socials, i have to admit some don't intend to ever meet but we've never had a major problem - just move on! Z

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

i still think as a previous post said there should be a bit for just couples seeking couples who have been verified for other couples then maybe the"pool diluters" could get bloody peace and not moaned about!!

some do have lives outwith this some dont get verified after every meet for whatever reason and some just like to be private and dont feel need to advertise!

maybe a bit for newbies too to get an idea if they want to meet or just curious x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How profound was that last post?

So glad that I am now aware of who the swinging experts are on the site....

Can sleep well tonight knowing I am in the company of such wisdom"

Amen to that lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

God its getting so bitchy around here these days!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If it says on a profile " not looking to meet " bypass it and move on, just like u do any profile that doesnt interest you. who cares if people are on here to just chat .

The main chatters are in the forums, so if they dont wanna meet or they do wanna meet, it'l probably say on their profiles.....

Hence why people have profiles.

simples

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

gotta say tho, it makes a refreshing change to have a good post with a good debate instead of seeing some of the drivel being posted lately

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"gotta say tho, it makes a refreshing change to have a good post with a good debate instead of seeing some of the drivel being posted lately

"
I have to agree with you. Also lots of threads get spoilt by people hijacking it by turning it into their own personal chat between friends, instead of IMing. Back on topic...I joined the site to meet people and I do. People message me and I look at profiles. If I dont want to meet or I'm not what someone is looking for I move on. If everyone on the site was here to meet I still wouldn't appeal to everyone or they to me. It's a tad presumptuous to assume that if everyone was meeting you'd have a bigger pool to pick from. We're here to find fun in all its guises to suit our individual tastes: how others play or dont play is of little concern to me as I'm getting my groove on!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

No matter if your taking a break,not meeting at the moment or whatever, we can't see the point in hiding a profile.

Why not let people have a look if they wish and who knows, maybe put you in their Hotlist for future reference and to contact you when your swinging again.

Makes much more sense than hiding it, sort of like "We ain't looking for no one, so no ones looking at us!".

XXXX

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

i thought i would put my 2 pennys worth in as a married man playing alone and as a member with my profile hidden at the moment - i have hidden mine as i wanna slow down after a few mad months of meets and when i put on my profile no more meets it seems to be like a red rag to a bull i end up with more messages then when i'm looking for meets and as i dont like to be rude and not answer my messages so i hide my profile to stop the messages. I agree that people have different opinions, but do think there is a certain group of people on here who think they own the site and they make the rules, if theres someone playing on here u dont agree with then dont talk to them!!! we all here for different things mostly a laugh and fun.

i think the biggest problem on here is not the time wasters its men setting up profiles and pretending their couples or females!!! its sick and makes me wonder if one day a single female is going to be in danger if she falls for it

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

and there is the message of hope for single guys!! he's gettin loads of meets ask him what his secret is!! xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"and there is the message of hope for single guys!! he's gettin loads of meets ask him what his secret is!! xx"

Being polite, sensible, non-pushy, and able to string words together to form proper sentances undoubtedly helps!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

To the OP ...

There is also a 'marvellous function' called freedom of choice !!!

We didn't look for any meets for about 3 months following a health issue but we didn't hide our profile - why should we ? There are forums and the chat rooms on this site as well and I think we were well within our rights to still use them even though we wern't meeting !!!!!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"To the OP ...

There is also a 'marvellous function' called freedom of choice !!!

well said

we said in another thread how we joined looking to meet folk but haven't come across anyone who we like enough yet to jump into our first meet and to be honest haven't had much response but we enjoy browsing and talking to who we do talk to!

now all of a sudden the emphasis is on why are people here after a few months and not verified and then were treated like lepers!

why shoudl we hide our profile? that would defeat the purpose of what we are here for, an eventual meet when we meet someone we can click with.

sorry but like a lot of newbies were not just gonna jump into bed with the first verified member that comes along so we can get that magic lil tick

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

and thats the way it should be! no one should be forced. very offputting for people to think that they must meet with x amount of time! there are no hard and fast excuse the pun, rules that i am aware of??

who is to say that people arent swinging outside of the site and not adverstisin the fact on their profile cause it their private business!!

yes there are time wasters, voyeurs, thrill seekers, cyber lifers and so forth but the genuine ones shine through!!

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By *aucy3Couple over a year ago

glasgow

"The long and the short of it is this.. If you do not intend to meet others for some kind of sexual encounter, you are not a swinger and are perhaps in the wrong place!

1. This is a swingers site!

2. Swingers meet other for sex!

3. To be a swinger you need to participate!

4. To participate, you need to meet people.

But I suppose with that old chestnut "Each to their own" Someone is bound to say that it is OK for non swingers to dilute the pool! Makes it harder to find genuine people though...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"No matter if your taking a break,not meeting at the moment or whatever, we can't see the point in hiding a profile.

Why not let people have a look if they wish and who knows, maybe put you in their Hotlist for future reference and to contact you when your swinging again.

Makes much more sense than hiding it, sort of like "We ain't looking for no one, so no ones looking at us!".

XXXX"

Have to disagree with you there, its all down to personal choice, we have our profile hidden at the moment as we have enough of our regular playmates to meet and however much you put on your profile not meeting new people at the moment, you still get messages, winks and friends invites. We find it easier just to hide it until we feel ready to meet again. Less chance of offending someone when you have to reply to a message with no thanks at the moment

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The long and the short of it is this.. If you do not intend to meet others for some kind of sexual encounter, you are not a swinger and are perhaps in the wrong place!

1. This is a swingers site!

2. Swingers meet other for sex!

3. To be a swinger you need to participate!

4. To participate, you need to meet people.

But I suppose with that old chestnut "Each to their own" Someone is bound to say that it is OK for non swingers to dilute the pool! Makes it harder to find genuine people though...

I really must disagree with, and to a point am offended by your 1st paragraph. Firstly we were on a site before this one which we did pay for, but due to my wife being diagnosed with breast cancer, we didn't meet for 6 months while she had her treatment, so because of that we wern't swingers were we not ? and maybe we were also not on the right site either ?

I think,as you requested, I have shot you down to be honest and will argue the point no further although I could do so, but I'm pretty certain many others will do the job for me.

Oh btw, sorry if we 'diluted the pool' but you need to remember my friend that there are many many reasons why people 'don't want' or are otherwise unable to meet, lets hope one day you are not in that position yourselves.......

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"can i ask ,when you thought of joining a swingers site.what did you think swinging involved. a wee bit of carpentry perhaps.

Ehhhh.......... and your point is??

was that to hard.its a question.i asked the question,see above.you give the answer."

Ehhhh, pardon me for apparently being a little thick, but if I understood the question then maybe I could provide an answer!

What on earth has carpentry to do with swinging? And exactly what does it have to do with the OP??

And please refrain from hijacking the thread!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

How very bizarre !

Say something that OP doesn't like and they block you

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By *aucy3Couple over a year ago

glasgow

"can i ask ,when you thought of joining a swingers site.what did you think swinging involved. a wee bit of carpentry perhaps.

Ehhhh.......... and your point is??

was that to hard.its a question.i asked the question,see above.you give the answer.

Ehhhh, pardon me for apparently being a little thick, but if I understood the question then maybe I could provide an answer!

What on earth has carpentry to do with swinging? And exactly what does it have to do with the OP??

And please refrain from hijacking the thread!"
at least you own up to being a little thick.i wont ask anymore questions,as you seem to have real problems in that area.plus youve never heard of the carpentry position,come on.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Googling carpentry position

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By *aucy3Couple over a year ago

glasgow

"Googling carpentry position

"
let the glaswegian know.he seems to be having problems.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Googling carpentry position

Its where you do it doggy style over the saw bench. Surely you knew that ?

Make sure you don't go against the grain, plane and simple ..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"can i ask ,when you thought of joining a swingers site.what did you think swinging involved. a wee bit of carpentry perhaps.

Ehhhh.......... and your point is??

was that to hard.its a question.i asked the question,see above.you give the answer.

Ehhhh, pardon me for apparently being a little thick, but if I understood the question then maybe I could provide an answer!

What on earth has carpentry to do with swinging? And exactly what does it have to do with the OP??

And please refrain from hijacking the thread!at least you own up to being a little thick.i wont ask anymore questions,as you seem to have real problems in that area.plus youve never heard of the carpentry position,come on."

The man is right. You are no authority on anything and your failure to understand that other people have different motives, drivers and reasonings to you is your inadequacy, not theirs.

You're doing a good job of advertising how pig headed you can be. It might save someone meeting up with you to discover that

It certainly won't be us...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Googling carpentry position

Its where you do it doggy style over the saw bench. Surely you knew that ?

Make sure you don't go against the grain, plane and simple .. "

I thought it was a woman who was as flat as a board and easily nailed!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

We are both members of a few bike forums but I haven't had a bike since my 900r in 2005 and Gary hasnt had one since 2006.

Doesnt mean we wont ever get another. So why should we should feel like frauds on the sites We just enjoy the banter from folk with a similar attitude to life.

Cant see any diff here as long as people are not led up the garden path about it.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Googling carpentry position

Its where you do it doggy style over the saw bench. Surely you knew that ?

Make sure you don't go against the grain, plane and simple ..

I thought it was a woman who was as flat as a board and easily nailed!

Would that be a floorboard - Tongue in Groove ? I prefer to screw it, not nail it - much more secure

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Googling carpentry position

Its where you do it doggy style over the saw bench. Surely you knew that ?

Make sure you don't go against the grain, plane and simple ..

I thought it was a woman who was as flat as a board and easily nailed!

Would that be a floorboard - Tongue in Groove ? I prefer to screw it, not nail it - much more secure

I just assumed it meant hammering in with a large tool, but the tongue in grove sound fun too

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Googling carpentry position

Its where you do it doggy style over the saw bench. Surely you knew that ?

Make sure you don't go against the grain, plane and simple ..

I thought it was a woman who was as flat as a board and easily nailed!

Would that be a floorboard - Tongue in Groove ? I prefer to screw it, not nail it - much more secure

I just assumed it meant hammering in with a large tool, but the tongue in grove sound fun too

the "groove" would be in the grove ^^^

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

I googled and found it to be something to do with wood as you would expect..... but not sex....what am I missing?

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By *i 1 Get 1 FreeCouple (MM) over a year ago

birmingham

"what am I missing?"

Us!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I googled and found it to be something to do with wood as you would expect..... but not sex....what am I missing?"

Its much too complicated to explain, I'd need to show you

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

"what am I missing?

Us!!

lol is that a clue?

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

"I googled and found it to be something to do with wood as you would expect..... but not sex....what am I missing?

Its much too complicated to explain, I'd need to show you

Np I like demonstrations

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I thought a carpenter was someone well used to handling tools

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

J.C was a carpenter in Nazareth ....

Naaaaaah don't say it, he wasn't, was he ?

Jeeeeez, never thought swinging went back so many years

Then again Chippy Minton was also a carpenter, then there was 'The Carpenters' who were singers.

Imagine Jesus Christ, Chippy Minton and the carpenters all in the same room - now that would be one Mother Fu**er of a social

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By *aucy3Couple over a year ago

glasgow

"can i ask ,when you thought of joining a swingers site.what did you think swinging involved. a wee bit of carpentry perhaps.

Ehhhh.......... and your point is??

was that to hard.its a question.i asked the question,see above.you give the answer.

Ehhhh, pardon me for apparently being a little thick, but if I understood the question then maybe I could provide an answer!

What on earth has carpentry to do with swinging? And exactly what does it have to do with the OP??

The man is right. You are no authority on anything and your failure to understand that other people have different motives, drivers and reasonings to you is your inadequacy, not theirs.

You're doing a good job of advertising how pig headed you can be. It might save someone meeting up with you to discover that

It certainly won't be us..."
well thats a relief

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By *aucy3Couple over a year ago

glasgow

"Googling carpentry position

"
to late but i meant to say keep it simple.

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By *umourCouple over a year ago

Northants

Zoe, I didn't aim that at those who don't want to meet at the moment! It was aimed at those who never want to meet anyone and just sit in the chat room or forums! Whether they like it or not, they are not swingers and as this is a site for swingers, I can't understand what they are doing here!

I also know all of the arguments about them not hurting, but they also have nothing to lose and may not be a discrete as those of us who do play. One of the couples who were on here last year was a couple local to us. They just wanted to nose and had no intention of playing at all. They did however cause us a few problems before they left! One guy worked with Mrs R and lucky for us everyone at work already knew! (another story!)

I know they will always be on the site, but doesn't mean we have to like it!

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By *umourCouple over a year ago

Northants

"God its getting so bitchy around here these days!"

Yep! The same people who are defending the rights of Non Swingers to be on a Swingers site are the very ones who are decrying my right to put my point of view!!

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By *ickmealloverWoman over a year ago

a very plush appartment off junt 7 M5

facebook is for people who dont meet

Thats why I'm not on there

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

Sounds like this has run its course and people are not really debating but scoring points now.

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By *umourCouple over a year ago

Northants

OK, this is my last post on this topic because people seem unable to grasp the basics!!!

I am not talking about people who have been swingers and for whatever reason have to stop! I am not talking about people who want to swing and are nervous newbies. I am not even talking about all those single guys who are Hopeful! lol

I am talking about those few couples/singles who just want a nose for a while and will certainly never meet and can (and have) caused trouble, certainly for us! But anyway Swinging is a mainstream thing now so we have to expect it to happen, but like I said earlier, we don't have to like it!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"They did however cause us a few problems before they left! One guy worked with Mrs R and lucky for us everyone at work already knew! (another story!"

Have you not thought maybe that because everyone at work knew, one of them came and found you on the site as a result?

Can't see the harm in people being on here to chat on the forums or with past friends, even if they will never play... there's even a cybersex option on our profiles, so people are well withing their rights to be here for just that.

These people you speak of are just as innocuous as the next person who just doesn't want to play with you because you are a couple, or because they don't fancy you. They can be just a dangerous too.

Anyone can come on this site, it is free to sign up so if you have security issues why not address that by making your profile more secure?

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By *aucy3Couple over a year ago

glasgow

swingers:a person who indulges in promiscuous sex;a person who engages in the exchanging of partners for sexual activities.i would doubt anybodys honesty.if they joined a swingers site,and didnt have a vague idea, this is what swinging meant.everybody does this at thier own pace.you cant fancy everyone.everybody is nervous.everybody takes a break now and again.but sooner or later,if you are not having sex, with other people.you are on a swingers site,and you are not a swinger.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

swingers....

A person who actively seeks excitement and moves with the latest trends...

a person regarded as being modern and lively...

someone who swings sports implements...

so not always about sex, maybe they joined for the above reason, i know i did...lol...

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By *habsMan over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

Swinger(s):

Person(s) with above average "awareness" of their own sexuality and appetites looking to "explore" and share with others like-minded.

Note the words:

1) "Persons" - never said guy/girl/couple/bi/gay/straight.

2)"awareness" - not the same as prowess

3) "explore" - means "participation. A single guy that has gone to socials and parties and "shares" with others will ALWAYS be more of a swinger than a couple who merely use the chatrooms but don't meet and have done this for the last 5 years.

Just my opinion - shoot me.

Now, where's Pearl Necklace... those beads of yours need replacing of my own.

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

I always thought swingers would have more tolerance of what other people want sexually

As long as people are honest about what they are after, be that swinging /cyber/ camfun/chat..then what difference does it make? People can just avoid the people who are not after the same things as them.

If you find someone pretending to want something to get what they want, block and forget about them and move onto the next person

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By *yber pimpMan over a year ago

durham area

"Was on here as a 'swingle' for quite a while, had some amazing times, met some fabulous people and made some great friends.

One of the great things about this site in particular is the social side of it and I'm not prepared to walk away from that just because I only want to talk.

So whether people like it or not Furry and Boots are here to chat and we'll catch you in the forums............. xxx

xxx"
you be getting a dawn visit from the SWING POLICE lol on a swing site and not meeting how dare you lmao

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By *arandjasCouple over a year ago

glasgow

hubby and i are new to this, and as yet have not had any meets, but only because we are taking our time and looking for a female that seems right for us, we have every intention of meeting, but are not jumping into it

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By *thwalescplCouple over a year ago

brecon

"The long and the short of it is this.. If you do not intend to meet others for some kind of sexual encounter, you are not a swinger and are perhaps in the wrong place!

1. This is a swingers site!

2. Swingers meet other for sex!

3. To be a swinger you need to participate!

4. To participate, you need to meet people.

But I suppose with that old chestnut "Each to their own" Someone is bound to say that it is OK for non swingers to dilute the pool! Makes it harder to find genuine people though...

Two posters who demonstrate a complete lack of understanding about the phrase "personal choice".

There are a plethora of reasons why different people join a site like this.

Yes, there will be those who just come to be nosy, some that never intend to play, some who even come on here with the intention of causing mischief.......

then there will be, at the other end of the spectrum, those who are "hardcore" swingers, for whom a week without a meet is a wasted week. The point here is that we are all different.

As far as the above "spectrum" goes, I would guess (going by our verifs) we are somewhere about 2/3 of the way along it, but at the moment we are not meeting. We havent put it on our profile, because its no-ones business but ours.

As for the above posters assertion that seemingly theirs is the only opinion that matters, I say this.... if someone tried to tell you how to live YOUR life, you would probbaly tell them to sling their hook wouldnt you?

...... so, get heaving!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"A rose by any other name would smell as sweet"....it seems that what peeps define as a "swinger" is as personal and indivdual as the person applying that "label" to themself.

Hey if you dont intend to meet now or ever...thats your business...it would just be fair on the peeps that do.... to make it clear on your profile...so everybody clearly knows what your stance is.....clarity and honesty...is appreciated by all.

The semantics of the word swinger is getting irrelevant...it is meaning whatever peeps want it to mean now.

I could call myself a"pole vaulter" or a "marathon runner"..and join sites for athletes..talk about athletics...mail other athletes...contritue to the forums etc...but my friends would laugh their blooming heads off..but if i choose to label myself as an "athlete"...thats my choice...but in the real world others may not agree...and say you talk the talk...but you dont walk the walk...

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By *habsMan over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

""A rose by any other name would smell as sweet"....it seems that what peeps define as a "swinger" is as personal and indivdual as the person applying that "label" to themself.

The semantics of the word swinger is getting irrelevant...it is meaning whatever peeps want it to mean now.

Pole vaulter - and MY you vault poles well!

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By *aucy3Couple over a year ago

glasgow

"swingers....

A person who actively seeks excitement and moves with the latest trends...

a person regarded as being modern and lively...

someone who swings sports implements...

so not always about sex, maybe they joined for the above reason, i know i did...lol...

"
so when you joined a swingers site, thats what you thought it meant.nothing to do with sex mmmmm.to be honest we were the same,but ive not even had a game of golf

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Thanks Mr A..hehe...now I have my verification as a bonefide pole vaulter...I am off to bigblkpolestovault.com to chat about it...

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By *habsMan over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

"Thanks Mr A..hehe...now I have my verification as a bonefide pole vaulter...I am off to bigblkpolestovault.com to chat about it...

*Ahem - the home server for that site is in London

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

have to have a say in this we meet and it like an addiction to be on this site when not in postion to meet as have family pressures but I certainly walk and talk the walk.

when do meet up in is incredible and cant wait for next one. but something goes wrong like recently had a chest infection and did not feel in the least bit sexy so turned down meets.

but now am all better am in hunting mode again but I see it as fun. I chat a lot in the chat rooms as see alot of the same people on line as me. The chat room is my social meeting place as when we meet we play as it our way. We have usualy broken the ice in the chat room and know weither we want to play with someone or not.

Does all this chat room socialiseing make us non swingers or talkers I not

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"have to have a say in this we meet and it like an addiction to be on this site when not in postion to meet as have family pressures but I certainly walk and talk the walk.

when do meet up in is incredible and cant wait for next one. but something goes wrong like recently had a chest infection and did not feel in the least bit sexy so turned down meets.

Does all this chat room socialiseing make us non swingers or talkers I not"

Yay..great verifications..you certainly do walk the walk...

I am not playing at the moment as my man has broken his leg....this is clearly posted on single and couple profile...when he is better we will be like dogs on heat again...

my point ..and it is purely my own personal opinion....is being on a swingers site...not playing and not having the intention to ever play...well you can call yourself a swinger...but other peeps may not agree that you are one...but as others have said...no judgement and each to their own

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"swingers....

A person who actively seeks excitement and moves with the latest trends...

a person regarded as being modern and lively...

someone who swings sports implements...

so not always about sex, maybe they joined for the above reason, i know i did...lol...

so when you joined a swingers site, thats what you thought it meant.nothing to do with sex mmmmm.to be honest we were the same,but ive not even had a game of golf"
i joined the site as a recommendation from someone i was chatting to on a paid site...hence chatting...and single at the time...

they said the chatrooms better on here...

i wanted to gain my confidence before thinking bout anything else...

even tho its a sex site, the flirting, banter and attraction had to be there, not gonna just have sex with anyone even if it was available...

im now a couple, someone i met on the site...

people will meet people but when their ready not when people expect....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"swingers....

A person who actively seeks excitement and moves with the latest trends...

a person regarded as being modern and lively...

someone who swings sports implements...

so not always about sex, maybe they joined for the above reason, i know i did...lol...

so when you joined a swingers site, thats what you thought it meant.nothing to do with sex mmmmm.to be honest we were the same,but ive not even had a game of golfi joined the site as a recommendation from someone i was chatting to on a paid site...hence chatting...and single at the time...

they said the chatrooms better on here...

i wanted to gain my confidence before thinking bout anything else...

even tho its a sex site, the flirting, banter and attraction had to be there, not gonna just have sex with anyone even if it was available...

im now a couple, someone i met on the site...

people will meet people but when their ready not when people expect...."

well said u

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

We haven't read all the thread, but to answer the OP's question....

We're not looking to meet at the mo because Andy has broken his ankle. We have some nice pics on our profile for people to look at (which we enjoy knowing people are looking), so why hide our profile.

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By *habsMan over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

"We haven't read all the thread, but to answer the OP's question....

To be fair, I think "Not lookign to meet at the moment" due to a temporary occurence is different from people who aren't lookign to meet/play "at all".

Each to their own and all that but I find it a little odd if all some peopel want to do is use sites for "only" socialising (forums / chat rooms / at most mybe a social or two). Makes me wonder - do they consider themselves swingers?

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By *inge61Couple over a year ago

n/wales

what has it got to do with anyone if you do or dont get a life lol

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By *leasureDomeMan over a year ago

all over the place

Swinging is a lifestyle ,a mental freedom to throw off societies petty victorian conventions.What people do or dont do is part of that freedom of expression and long may it last.

The most basic premise of swinging to me is NO means NO and also no pressure ....

leave your profiles on if you want and have a good perve

pd x

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By *habsMan over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

"what has it got to do with anyone if you do or dont get a life lol "

I have a like thanks

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By *inge61Couple over a year ago

n/wales

well all stop bitchin then

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By *habsMan over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

"well all stop bitchin then

Well, forums are about debate and points of view (no one ever said points had to be agreed on), to however then drop "Get a life" on someone is metaphorically throwing a punch as its quite insulting in such few words. Might as well have said "fuck off". That's not debate.

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By *nfluencer2Man over a year ago

manchester

[Removed by poster at 13/12/09 17:11:25]

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By *nfluencer2Man over a year ago

manchester

"well all stop bitchin then

Its also the sign of someone very intellectually restricted or perhaps not that skilled at communication.

Is this due to a poor education or perhaps that they are too lazy to utilise their time improving such skills- perhaps spending too much time on forums and not enough time enhancing their wider capabilities.

Me thinks it reflects badly on the stereo-type of the typical swinger that is being built by certain sections of the media.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"what has it got to do with anyone if you do or dont get a life lol "

Nice to see the art of witty and meaningful retort is alive and well.

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