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Let down again
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Are we the only people on Fab to experience yet another let down? This is the fourth one over a couple of months. All of them were meet verified, 2 gave the usual excuses but 2 just stopped messaging on the day. Where are all of the genuine guys gone? |
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By (user no longer on site) 12 weeks ago
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"Are we the only people on Fab to experience yet another let down? This is the fourth one over a couple of months. All of them were meet verified, 2 gave the usual excuses but 2 just stopped messaging on the day. Where are all of the genuine guys gone?"
you’d be surprised the few of us that are left are also getting a lot of let downs or time wasters I’ve had multiple in the last two weeks
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By *WANDTGCouple 12 weeks ago
Borough of Greenwich |
We just had this in Spain, chatted 6 weeks before going out ( they live there) then more in depth chatting up to final week before departure. Then spoke Saturday with intentions of meeting on the Sunday, all was ok. Then Sunday before our 6.30 pm arranged date, they messaged at 5.15 pm to say something has came up so they can't do it. By the end of the week they had left the site !!! |
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"Happens all the time. It’s why we deleted our previous account. Only log in now to check for social and club events "
I'm thinking of deleting the profile, what's the point if no one meets anymore |
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"Happens all the time. It’s why we deleted our previous account. Only log in now to check for social and club events
I'm thinking of deleting the profile, what's the point if no one meets anymore "
Looking at your profile, cant believe they let you down, very sexy looking and would be great to have a play with you both |
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We have had this happen three times just recently, all for a meeting and then at the very last moment radio silence.
Up side of this each time we have been let down we have gone to a club and have had a great play with couples we have met on the night. |
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"Are we the only people on Fab to experience yet another let down? This is the fourth one over a couple of months. All of them were meet verified, 2 gave the usual excuses but 2 just stopped messaging on the day. Where are all of the genuine guys gone?"
just wanna volunteer not to be a dissapointment and not turn up |
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By * and BCouple 12 weeks ago
Durham |
We used to be let down time and time again, very rarely we arrange a meet these days. Clubs are the way, it's where we go to meet people these days. We've had let downs with folk saying they'll meet us in a club we are going to, but we have already decided to go to club for us to have a night out, so a let down in this environment doesn't bother us, as we are dressing up to go out anyway (or dressing down)   |
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"Are we the only people on Fab to experience yet another let down? This is the fourth one over a couple of months. All of them were meet verified, 2 gave the usual excuses but 2 just stopped messaging on the day. Where are all of the genuine guys gone?"
I know the feeling of being let down and time wasters OP but genuine guy here |
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"Are we the only people on Fab to experience yet another let down? This is the fourth one over a couple of months. All of them were meet verified, 2 gave the usual excuses but 2 just stopped messaging on the day. Where are all of the genuine guys gone?"
That is ridiculous, you look like everymans dream woman to me. (Hubby). |
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"Are we the only people on Fab to experience yet another let down? This is the fourth one over a couple of months. All of them were meet verified, 2 gave the usual excuses but 2 just stopped messaging on the day. Where are all of the genuine guys gone?"
Unfortunately we've lost track of the number of let downs we've had via Fab which is why we try to ensure all first meets are at clubs now. Even the most 'genuine' looking profiles who state they are 'not like the others' can be capable of disappointment. And we might add, it's not just single guys  |
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Most “ single men” bi or straight seems to be married and we can’t seem to find anyone who actually wants to meet. Most of the wants to have a chat have a wank and be done with it.
Putting any effort in the message seems way beyond most people’s ability 😤 |
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We get it too
This is why we now only meet single males in clubs unless we're in the mood to invite one to ours (and even then we get the oh I can't make it tonight can I come on Wednesday instead 🤦 no if we wanted you to join us then we would have said would you like to meet on Wednesday) |
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"If no shows and let downs are happening to you on a regular occurrence maybe change the way you carry out your due diligence.
Continue with the same pattern you will get the same result."
Yes I get what you are saying but the same due diligence has worked for the last 8 years without any problems. Why in the last 6 months or so has all of the time wasting started? |
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"We get it too
This is why we now only meet single males in clubs unless we're in the mood to invite one to ours (and even then we get the oh I can't make it tonight can I come on Wednesday instead 🤦 no if we wanted you to join us then we would have said would you like to meet on Wednesday)"
We don't always want to go to a club, our local one only holds an event to suit us once a month so we want to host occasionally. Why is it so difficult. |
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"Happens all the time. It’s why we deleted our previous account. Only log in now to check for social and club events
I'm thinking of deleting the profile, what's the point if no one meets anymore "
People do meet though.
Maybe it's time to change how you go about things |
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So far this year: thirteen meets arranged, seven no-shows.
People say to go to clubs - we hate clubs, other than the occasional quiet daytime events.
People say to change how we vet - we only meet people with meet verifications (that we thoroughly check back) themselves within the last twelve months and only within an hour as these used to be the common denominators of no-shows. Now it's just nobody thinks how their actions affect others it seems. |
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By *.hrisMan 11 weeks ago
Bath |
"Are we the only people on Fab to experience yet another let down? This is the fourth one over a couple of months. All of them were meet verified, 2 gave the usual excuses but 2 just stopped messaging on the day. Where are all of the genuine guys gone?"
I'm not far from you, you should keep me in mind as back up incase of a no show  |
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People say go to clubs I am a single woman that doesn't drive. It would take me approximately 6 to 8 hours to get to a swinging club by bus and train. I would have got a room as I would have to stay over.
So it would mean taking up 2 days and cost approximately £200 plus expenses as in getting into the club, food and drink. |
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I've had the same thing with a few couples over the last few months. Lengthy chats, plans in place, then the vanishing act!
I like to think I'm upfront re my circumstances and accept that for many they don't want to meet attached guys, but several couples indicate this is not an issue.
Of course we can't insist people meet, and I'm not naive re that, but as with many in this thread, it's frustrating, time wasting. |
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This happens to us, sadly single guys are the Main Culprits and is Happening more often. The site seems Plagued by so called single guys giving it the big one but are in reality just ego trippers and Fantasists. Still keeping the Faith though xx |
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"Are we the only people on Fab to experience yet another let down? This is the fourth one over a couple of months. All of them were meet verified, 2 gave the usual excuses but 2 just stopped messaging on the day. Where are all of the genuine guys gone?"
When the Ex and I started, there was no internet lol and in Africa. We relied on word of mouth and Taxi drivers. When the internet came along we were living here and found it difficult to find anything so we turned our attention to Dogging which was full of fun. The only 2 good swinger sites we had ever found was when I got a long term contract in Oz. Met many fantastic single/married men who didn't let us down. Also met a good few couples that were into the same thing as us over there. |
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By (user no longer on site) 11 weeks ago
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"Are we the only people on Fab to experience yet another let down? This is the fourth one over a couple of months. All of them were meet verified, 2 gave the usual excuses but 2 just stopped messaging on the day. Where are all of the genuine guys gone?"
It happened to me last night.
A couple approached me on here. Swapped photos etc kept asking me to come over. When I agreed, they vanished🤷🏻♂️
I’m not bothered by it and you shouldn’t be. I think some are either attention seeking, not ever planning to meet. They’ve found something “better” or just bottled it.
Don’t worry about it. Be you and enjoy it when it happens 😉 |
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"We get it too
This is why we now only meet single males in clubs unless we're in the mood to invite one to ours (and even then we get the oh I can't make it tonight can I come on Wednesday instead 🤦 no if we wanted you to join us then we would have said would you like to meet on Wednesday)"
Nothing worse than entitled couples who think a guy will come running at the drop of a hat, just because they’re free that evening…. 
After over 13 years in Fab, I’ve never let anyone down for a pre-arranged meet. I have been cancelled on last minute, and ghosted plenty of times though, and even taken the oft-quoted advice of “Just go to a club”……..only to discover what discrimination actually feels like… |
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Happened to me a couple of weeks ago. Went to meet a couple who I’ve been chatting to for a couple of months, got to our meeting place, they kept saying they’re on their way while I was waiting, then they stopped responding. Like… why? |
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By (user no longer on site) 11 weeks ago
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Happened to me couple of times as well it’s nightmare.. but you mentioned they’re meet verified accounts that’s doesn’t mean they’re will attend 100% just time wasters |
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"If no shows and let downs are happening to you on a regular occurrence maybe change the way you carry out your due diligence.
Continue with the same pattern you will get the same result.
Yes I get what you are saying but the same due diligence has worked for the last 8 years without any problems. Why in the last 6 months or so has all of the time wasting started? "
Maybe the advice this poster is giving couples to better their chances is how the folk arranging meets are managing their meets.
'Arrange 4X more than you need then if you have too many, it’s a better problem than none and a waste of time haha'
For every meet there will be 3 let downs.... you (not personally) become the timewaster. Ergo this is shit advice🤷♀️🙄
This place is like everywhere, peaks n troughs of meets n dry spells. Nature of the game 🥰 |
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"Are we the only people on Fab to experience yet another let down? This is the fourth one over a couple of months. All of them were meet verified, 2 gave the usual excuses but 2 just stopped messaging on the day. Where are all of the genuine guys gone?"
Genuine from Bath here x |
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"Are we the only people on Fab to experience yet another let down? This is the fourth one over a couple of months. All of them were meet verified, 2 gave the usual excuses but 2 just stopped messaging on the day. Where are all of the genuine guys gone?"
I will not confirm a meet until certain if making time/place/date....
Recently been chatting to a few couples/ladies... All seems fine then suddenly no longer there!!
Annoying especially on one where I had set off to meet train journey... Luckily checked phone at station!!! |
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"Are we the only people on Fab to experience yet another let down? This is the fourth one over a couple of months. All of them were meet verified, 2 gave the usual excuses but 2 just stopped messaging on the day. Where are all of the genuine guys gone?
I'm not far from you, you should keep me in mind as back up incase of a no show "
I had a guy that I could have messaged and he would have arrived within minutes (he lives a 2 minute walk away) but I just cba, it's so disheartening. But thank you for the offer |
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"Are we the only people on Fab to experience yet another let down? This is the fourth one over a couple of months. All of them were meet verified, 2 gave the usual excuses but 2 just stopped messaging on the day. Where are all of the genuine guys gone?
The is a well known dogging site not far from us. It's not something that we've ever been tempted to try. What if we make the effort to go and there's no one that I would want to have sex with, another wasted night.
When the Ex and I started, there was no internet lol and in Africa. We relied on word of mouth and Taxi drivers. When the internet came along we were living here and found it difficult to find anything so we turned our attention to Dogging which was full of fun. The only 2 good swinger sites we had ever found was when I got a long term contract in Oz. Met many fantastic single/married men who didn't let us down. Also met a good few couples that were into the same thing as us over there."
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"Are we the only people on Fab to experience yet another let down? This is the fourth one over a couple of months. All of them were meet verified, 2 gave the usual excuses but 2 just stopped messaging on the day. Where are all of the genuine guys gone?
I will not confirm a meet until certain if making time/place/date....
Recently been chatting to a few couples/ladies... All seems fine then suddenly no longer there!!
Annoying especially on one where I had set off to meet train journey... Luckily checked phone at station!!!"
Date and time was confirmed, I had given him our postcode but not house number. I messaged him 2 hours before he was due to arrive and radio silence and not heard from him since. |
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Been let down before many times even meeting someone in the first place. I have learned by my mistakes too.
But need a bit of advice on this.
I been seeing someone off and on for some years and at varied times, when we meet it is good and both enjoy.
But recently been let down twice by them not turning up at a specified place and an agreed time beforehand they don't message to let me know until I message them first.
What would you do?
How would you feel? |
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Yup. It's endemic across all online dating / hookup / swinging sites unfortunately. The reality is that people get cold feet, change their minds, get better offers, whatever. In an anonymous world it's generally easier to ghost or lie that it is to have an awkward conversation. |
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By (user no longer on site) 7 weeks ago
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Are you actually telling me that there's single men out there lucky enough to organize a meet on this site with a woman when the odds are so heavily stacked against them, and they don't show? Like do you know the level of effort this shit takes? Wow dude. They're the reason my messages aren't going through. Because a woman's inbox is cluttered as fuck and I'm competing with them. Nice |
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"Are you actually telling me that there's single men out there lucky enough to organize a meet on this site with a woman when the odds are so heavily stacked against them, and they don't show? Like do you know the level of effort this shit takes? Wow dude. They're the reason my messages aren't going through. Because a woman's inbox is cluttered as fuck and I'm competing with them. Nice"
Exactly  |
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I just do not understand why at all.
If I arrange or agree to meet ,either social or anything more, then I show up.
I keep contact if I'm delayed and warm in advance that I'm a rubbish timekeeper pretty often.
It amazes me that couples would mess others around
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"Are you actually telling me that there's single men out there lucky enough to organize a meet on this site with a woman when the odds are so heavily stacked against them, and they don't show? Like do you know the level of effort this shit takes? Wow dude. They're the reason my messages aren't going through. Because a woman's inbox is cluttered as fuck and I'm competing with them. Nice"
Dude, you've only been here for two weeks. The effort hasn't even begun yet. It's really not unusual to go months without anything - and that applies to both sides. |
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Yeah we did. Had a good meet. Turns out he's hubbies friend. Doesn't even have a profile here I've looked. But I have met 2 good men for long term. So I wouldn't give up but I admit most of it is rubbish xxx |
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"Fair but the thing is, it's still absolutely ridiculous for men to at least get their foot in the door by being noticed, let alone have a conversation going"
From our experience, about 5% of guys understand how this site works and have multiple meets under their belts. The other 95% are clueless, have nothing and will get nothing. Don't be the 95% |
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By (user no longer on site) 7 weeks ago
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I'm not discrediting or delegitimizing the struggle that women have on this site to meet a proper man. What I'm trying to get through is that for us single guys, we have trouble even making contact because we're the majority on the site and because women have flooded inboxes which makes it hard to stand out and maintain a conversation. Sure there's different issues present for couples and women but not communication |
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By (user no longer on site) 7 weeks ago
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I've had a quite a few No Shows and a few Timewasters..
But, I've also had a great couple of Play Meets, an Organised Social and made a Friend (No Benefits)..
Regretfully, No-Shows and Ghosters are everywhere, as someone stated above, it's not just here! Keep your Filters tight, keep to Your preferences and Accept You'll get twits..
But us Genuine Ones are Out there (or buried under 300 messages in Your Inbox lol) |
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Only yesterday I was messsaged by a lady on here who made all the running. About 3 hours of what seemed like positive back and forth messaging and then all of a sudden silence. I just thought she was busy with something and she'd reply a bit later but no. Checked a few times today and she'd been logged in several times but didn't respond.
I don't mind a no response or a no thank you I've changed my mind but why go to all the trouble of contacting me and the 3 hours of messaging. It just doesn't make any sense.
Sadly, this happens a lot, not just this example. Almost a daily thing.
Also, getting a lot of arranging a meet only to be asked for money at the last moment.
Find it funny how people are saying that theres no genuine guys on here. Well, theres one right here! This one never lets anyone down and would never dream of messing anyone around.
I have met some really nice and lovely people on here too but my God, my sanity is being sorely tested to the point where I'm thinking of just giving up. Only so much timewasting one can take.
I just don't understand what anyone gets out of it.
Even noticed it in clubs, used to be a lot of fun, but since Covid I've noticed that they seem to be a lot more cliquey and focused on just getting the money in, so kind of stopped going. |
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Also recently had a few meets arranged, where I've shown up only to have my 'I've arrived and outside' message completly ignored and never heard from them again.
I mean, why make someone travel, if you are not serious? Wasted time, cab fares etc. It's really frustrating. |
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Ok I'm a wife. And I took page off hubby. Do you not think it's the husbands just getting jollies. Do you message the wives? I'm not being funny but that's why I did this and changed passwords etc. And it's better now I'm in control of who I meet xxxxxx |
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By (user no longer on site) 7 weeks ago
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"Ok I'm a wife. And I took page off hubby. Do you not think it's the husbands just getting jollies. Do you message the wives? I'm not being funny but that's why I did this and changed passwords etc. And it's better now I'm in control of who I meet xxxxxx"
When I message a Couples Profile, I always address the Messages to Both as Both should be in Control. But if it suits you better to be in charge then fair play |
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Pretty standard carry on for on here now I've found. Couples and women or more likely sad attention seeking men. If they aren't willing to prove they are genuine pretty early on i just move on. Sad reality is for men on here the competition is endless and you just get lost in the sea of time wasters,ego trippers and men pretending to be women / couples. Take it all with a pinch of salt. |
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"I'm not discrediting or delegitimizing the struggle that women have on this site to meet a proper man. What I'm trying to get through is that for us single guys, we have trouble even making contact because we're the majority on the site and because women have flooded inboxes which makes it hard to stand out and maintain a conversation. Sure there's different issues present for couples and women but not communication"
...and that top 5% have figured out the best ways to stand out and make contact. Our inbox is flooded with guys who make little to no effort. It really doesn't take much to not be like them |
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"Are we the only people on Fab to experience yet another let down? This is the fourth one over a couple of months. All of them were meet verified, 2 gave the usual excuses but 2 just stopped messaging on the day. Where are all of the genuine guys gone?"
Sorry to hear about your experiences OP. It would seem like it's becoming more common lately on here.
Like you guys, I've been on Fab for many years and it's only happened once to me but then I only get one or two meets a year. I'm not sure how it can be avoided, especially as the people you're meeting seem (from their profiles) to be reliable.
By the way OP, there is at least one very reliable man in your area 😉👋 |
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By *i versMan 7 weeks ago
Kirkcaldy |
"Are we the only people on Fab to experience yet another let down? This is the fourth one over a couple of months. All of them were meet verified, 2 gave the usual excuses but 2 just stopped messaging on the day. Where are all of the genuine guys gone?"
I'm up for meeting and won't disappoint ans would love to meet but I feel that you won't as I get this all the time so I feel your pain
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By *annyFoxCouple 7 weeks ago
Hagley / Halesowen |
"Are we the only people on Fab to experience yet another let down? This is the fourth one over a couple of months. All of them were meet verified, 2 gave the usual excuses but 2 just stopped messaging on the day. Where are all of the genuine guys gone?"
Happens to us regularly.
It's not us, and it's not you.
It's just a lot of profiles on here really aren't genuine |
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"Simply fantasists. Through various research I’ve deduced that over 75% of women here, are in fact just men and almost 60% of couples here, are also, in fact just men!!"
I would have gone with 25% and 40% fakes here |
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By *uck69xMan 7 weeks ago
cramlington |
"Simply fantasists. Through various research I’ve deduced that over 75% of women here, are in fact just men and almost 60% of couples here, are also, in fact just men!!"
I've had the same from females who we chat get along everything is great we both forefill each other's wants and desires then comes to meet their a no show . I had one female apologies the next day saying she fell asleep after a long day at work and would make it up to me . The next meeting was arranged again never turned up reported to admin but nothing was done about it and she wasn't removed
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"Through various research I’ve deduced that over 75% of women here, are in fact just men and almost 60% of couples here, are also, in fact just men!!
Impressive research. What did it entail ?"
I'm guessing that they work for Sydney University 😱 |
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nope every meet ive arranged via this account or our joint account has been spot on but i put the effort in to make sure they are real and i do it all via fab no other apps no phone no email just fab ...ive not been lrt down for years ... and i meet very often
the real problem is so many of our ladies and couples are ideed men faking it |
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By (user no longer on site) 7 weeks ago
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We seem to be on a good run at the moment! We always meet for a social only first & although we've had one cancel on the day, every other has gone ahead. I think part of the reason for this is even socials are arranged days in advance & I make sure in the interim, we keep chatting so the fantasists & married guys tend to get bored and disappear.
When we used to meet last minute/no prior social we'd get alot of no shows.
Alot of people don't want a social, I know and that's fine for them, but it works for us & any meets arranged go ahead.
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By (user no longer on site) 7 weeks ago
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"I'm not discrediting or delegitimizing the struggle that women have on this site to meet a proper man. What I'm trying to get through is that for us single guys, we have trouble even making contact because we're the majority on the site and because women have flooded inboxes which makes it hard to stand out and maintain a conversation. Sure there's different issues present for couples and women but not communication
...and that top 5% have figured out the best ways to stand out and make contact. Our inbox is flooded with guys who make little to no effort. It really doesn't take much to not be like them"
You're saying that fab has an esoteric kind of logic and best practices for making contact etc. and that there's a few good ways to present yourself/message to gain some woman's attention or interest? |
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By *TWboyMan 7 weeks ago
kings Lynn |
If I agree to meet then I’m there.
It’s actually on my profile.
There do appear to be a large number of both single men and couples time wasters in east Anglia though
The south West and North West seems better…. |
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It's such a shame there isn't a way of dealing with this... 2 parties agree to meet (they both confirm) press a button saying yes to confirm... Then if it goes ahead then press option yes all was good... If it was cancelled then leave feed back how & when or no message... I get everyone has lives away from swinging but just don't be knobs
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By *uck69xMan 7 weeks ago
cramlington |
"Earlier in the thread. Someone suggested arranging 4X meet same day. My thought . If all four were genuine. 3X let downs. Is that good , practice and manners. ? "
might be better that the site bans no shows for life . The no shows spoil it for the genuine members
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As I can't accommodate I'm happy to travel within reason. So far been let down by 1 couple and 3 single women. The couple waited till I had travelled to the meeting point to say not coming so did one of the singles. The other 2 just stopped chatting. All within the last 6 months. Only local meets now. |
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Until they actually turn up I never believe it will happen .... Don't travel if I can help it anymore as they have a habit of either blocking you,not responding or that magic fab trick 'User left site' ....
It's like Disneyland without the rides ! |
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The guy that generated this thread by letting us down by stopping messaging a few hours before the meet then got in touch a week later apologising and want wanting to meet that night. He said that he got cold feet and expected a second chance. I don't think so. |
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"Until they actually turn up I never believe it will happen .... Don't travel if I can help it anymore as they have a habit of either blocking you,not responding or that magic fab trick 'User left site' ....
It's like Disneyland without the rides ! "
This is how we feel now, it spoils the experience as I don't get excited then theres no disappointment. |
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"Are we the only people on Fab to experience yet another let down? This is the fourth one over a couple of months. All of them were meet verified, 2 gave the usual excuses but 2 just stopped messaging on the day. Where are all of the genuine guys gone?
Sorry to hear about your experiences OP. It would seem like it's becoming more common lately on here.
Like you guys, I've been on Fab for many years and it's only happened once to me but then I only get one or two meets a year. I'm not sure how it can be avoided, especially as the people you're meeting seem (from their profiles) to be reliable.
By the way OP, there is at least one very reliable man in your area 😉👋"
It seems that we are blocked |
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By *host63Man 7 weeks ago
Bedfont Feltham |
"Are we the only people on Fab to experience yet another let down? This is the fourth one over a couple of months. All of them were meet verified, 2 gave the usual excuses but 2 just stopped messaging on the day. Where are all of the genuine guys gone?"
Unfortunately the amount of times I have been stood up i have lost count of.
What's even worse is when they arrange a date and on the day yiur going say they are broke and need money because of a sick relative or as recently asking for money for a computer game to keep their 12yr old nephew who they are lollingbafyer because his aunt died to keep him occupied while she went out with me.
I mean I wonder how successful she was with that one?
I did give her 10 points for bullshit |
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"It's the norm on here now.
Let down mid week. Yet ANOTHER single guy changed his mind about 3hours ago after giving it the Big one. No doubt his Wife or GF suddenly changed their plans!!"
This. The site is rife with cheats. It must be gutting for them when their wife/girlfriend ruins their plans.
Always busier during the day when they're out at work. Gives the cheaters more opportunity to put in a poor performance (should be their partners on here looking for a decent shag 😆). |
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but if you’re ever in my area please look me up 