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how are u? RANT!

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By *nttake2 OP   Couple  over a year ago

South

why do folks send lame messages? this isnt a gp's surgery! if the profile has enough info in it, just ask what u want to ask! its a swing site, does anyone who asks 'how are u?' have any imagination? oh unless they are all timewasters. if in doubt, block em!

rant over.

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By *inaTitzTV/TS  over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

I like a balance between, 'how are you?' messages that go on for too long and the 'fancy a shag?' messages that are a bit too direct for my liking.

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By *issHottieBottieWoman  over a year ago

Kent


"I like a balance between, 'how are you?' messages that go on for too long and the 'fancy a shag?' messages that are a bit too direct for my liking. "

Agree ! X

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

So, how are you?

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By *issHottieBottieWoman  over a year ago

Kent


"So, how are you? "

Better now I've had my daily dose of your bottom

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"So, how are you? "

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By *nttake2 OP   Couple  over a year ago

South

no argument there as too direct/obvious are equally dull, bt please how rubbish is how are u? nobody cares! inane chat = facebook.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

How are you ....or what you into...two most annoying msgs

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

To be fair though. A lot us guys do spend time composing a nice opening message just to see it get deleted out of hand. So some maybe think "fuck it" why bother!

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By *ohnjones3210Man  over a year ago

Chester

Lol.... Well I know its a swinging site but people really don't want to hear "fancy a fuck" do they?

However, what I usually do it pick something abstract to talk about... Either make it up or base it on their profile.

For example, I might say... "Wow, winter is here. What did you think of this year's summer?" Or "interesting profile, I also like *whatever*... I think *blah blah*.

Doing this is usually successful but time consuming.

Obviously, "how are you" is a quick catch technique!

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By *ohnjones3210Man  over a year ago

Chester


"To be fair though. A lot us guys do spend time composing a nice opening message just to see it get deleted out of hand. So some maybe think "fuck it" why bother!"

That is also bang on. This has happened to many times in the past so I've changed my strategy a lot now.

I may send a sentence or two to someone who is online... If there's a reply... I'll then communicate properly. Elaborate, etc. Quality messages. I simply don't have time to send amazing messages to everyone but by all means, ill send good messages to those who reply.

X

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"To be fair though. A lot us guys do spend time composing a nice opening message just to see it get deleted out of hand. So some maybe think "fuck it" why bother!"

Exactly. Sometimes what works for one person will fail horribly with another. There's no such thing as a perfect message. In fact, what they write holds little significance if you're not attracted to them because it won't go any further.

Hands up those who played with someone they are not at all attracted to because they wrote a kick-ass message.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I am not a how are messenger, but what's the problem with it? a lot of people have seriously dull profiles u can't get anything off , so how are you is a way of letting someone know you find them interesting. Winks are frowned upon, fancy a fuck is disastrous. So how are you? Give a polite response and take it from there.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I am not a how are messenger, but what's the problem with it? a lot of people have seriously dull profiles u can't get anything off , so how are you is a way of letting someone know you find them interesting. Winks are frowned upon, fancy a fuck is disastrous. So how are you? Give a polite response and take it from there. "

There you go. A harmless "how are you" could be the beginning of one of the best sex sessions ever.

You never know. Strange things have happened...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

u can never really win with a first message if u message saying u wanna meet can get deleted for being to up front and if u try and make conversation are deemed lacking in imagination i have also spent 10 mins composing a nice long story/scenario in which i have gone into great detail and imagination as to what i would like to do only to have it deleted so tell u what shall everyone just message "i wanna fuck u" and see what reply u get coz lets be honest thats why were here,were not here looking for forever maybe a cpl of good sessions of sex

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

i have almost given up sending messages on here...you are caught between the devil and the deep blue see..whatever you type will largely get ignored

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By *odareyouMan  over a year ago

not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds)

I doubt the messager cares either,,

To me it shows a lack of imagination and originality ,,, its akin to the ' do you come here often, ' from the clubs and bars

To those who show a degree of originality you re far more likely to get a response,,,,.. it doesn t have to be a long message, original engaging and imaginitive,

Works for me,,;-)

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By *.nottsbloke..Man  over a year ago

1nottsbloke

asl ?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 28/10/13 16:17:45]

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By *arnaclebillMan  over a year ago

Robin Hood County


"So, how are you? "

Well, actually I fancy a shag Lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"asl ?"

Aye well I wish I could remember what gem you sent that got you into my knickers

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"So, how are you?

Better now I've had my daily dose of your bottom "

Right back at ya!

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By *oxy_minxWoman  over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

I wouldn't mind so much, if the mailer actually has a profile to read!

Otherwise, what a great conversation:

Hi, How are you?

Good thanks!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

block them boring old farts.

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By *ENDAROOSCouple  over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

We don't reply to how are you type messages. It does state that we won't in our profile, so we don't feel guilty about hitting the delete button.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

damn monday was going well on here no rants all morning, , thought we were going to have a full day

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By *lare GTV/TS  over a year ago

South of Sleaford

"Hi how r u?" does nothing to engage my interest. How do I reply?

A compliment about my pictures or profile is far more interesting.

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By *istress v in yorksCouple  over a year ago

south Yorkshire

I don't mind a simple 'hi, how are you message' it's exactly what you would get if you were chatting to someone in the 'real' world or in clubs. To me, it expresses initial interest, from it I can have a nosey a their profile, if they aren't what I'm looking for I say so then. Why waste time writing unique messages etc. Bit of a waste of time. Why should people jump through hoops to message me?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Personally I don't see what the issue is ....what is wrong with someone asking how you are, isn't it a fairly polite way of instigating further conversation?

Sometimes feel sorry for guys on here ....the expectations on then and the hoops some expect them to jump through gets a bit much at times. We are ALL here for pleasure not one side for the benefit of another surely. If people don't like a message then delete and block if they must....simple.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Personally I don't see what the issue is ....what is wrong with someone asking how you are, isn't it a fairly polite way of instigating further conversation?

Sometimes feel sorry for guys on here ....the expectations on then and the hoops some expect them to jump through gets a bit much at times. We are ALL here for pleasure not one side for the benefit of another surely. If people don't like a message then delete and block if they must....simple."

well said me dear

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


""Hi how r u?" does nothing to engage my interest. How do I reply?

A compliment about my pictures or profile is far more interesting."

You reply ... Fine thanks, how are you? ... And thus a conversation has been started

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


""Hi how r u?" does nothing to engage my interest. How do I reply?

A compliment about my pictures or profile is far more interesting.

You reply ... Fine thanks, how are you? ... And thus a conversation has been started

"

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By *am123Man  over a year ago

essex chelmsford


"why do folks send lame messages? this isnt a gp's surgery! if the profile has enough info in it, just ask what u want to ask! its a swing site, does anyone who asks 'how are u?' have any imagination? oh unless they are all timewasters. if in doubt, block em!

rant over. "

there are so many do's and dont's on here, and now how are you is frowned upon, so what would u find interesting

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By *lare GTV/TS  over a year ago

South of Sleaford

"You reply ... Fine thanks, how are you? ... And thus a conversation has been started"

Well thanks for the advice. I will give it a try.

But, I find that guys at clubs seem to have great difficulty communicating even speaking so there is no engagement or connection.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


""Hi how r u?" does nothing to engage my interest. How do I reply?

A compliment about my pictures or profile is far more interesting."

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"To be fair though. A lot us guys do spend time composing a nice opening message just to see it get deleted out of hand. So some maybe think "fuck it" why bother!"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Personally I don't see what the issue is ....what is wrong with someone asking how you are, isn't it a fairly polite way of instigating further conversation?

Sometimes feel sorry for guys on here ....the expectations on then and the hoops some expect them to jump through gets a bit much at times. We are ALL here for pleasure not one side for the benefit of another surely. If people don't like a message then delete and block if they must....simple."

What the lady said

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By *opping_candyWoman  over a year ago

West Yorkshire

Bores the tits off me. But it's the 'how are you what you up to got any plans for the week had a good weekend' messages that really bug me. I don't even go into that much detail about my life with my mother.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"i have almost given up sending messages on here...you are caught between the devil and the deep blue see..whatever you type will largely get ignored "

Yep

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Personally I don't see what the issue is ....what is wrong with someone asking how you are, isn't it a fairly polite way of instigating further conversation?

Sometimes feel sorry for guys on here ....the expectations on then and the hoops some expect them to jump through gets a bit much at times. We are ALL here for pleasure not one side for the benefit of another surely. If people don't like a message then delete and block if they must....simple."

Finally, a bit of reason!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

There are only a few ways to open a conversation. Someone just say that, and it is to short other go on for pages. But is better than fancy a fuck then love.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Not everyone is blunt and direct, if you was at a club and a guy came over and asked, so tell me do you take it up the arse? I'm sure he's get nowhere, in clubs people are polite and ask how you are to break the ice so why not on here?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"why do folks send lame messages? this isnt a gp's surgery! if the profile has enough info in it, just ask what u want to ask! its a swing site, does anyone who asks 'how are u?' have any imagination? oh unless they are all timewasters. if in doubt, block em!

rant over. "

Just out of interest, what kind of messages do you send out?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"why do folks send lame messages? this isnt a gp's surgery! if the profile has enough info in it, just ask what u want to ask! its a swing site, does anyone who asks 'how are u?' have any imagination? oh unless they are all timewasters. if in doubt, block em!

rant over.

Just out of interest, what kind of messages do you send out?"

Good question!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"To be fair though. A lot us guys do spend time composing a nice opening message just to see it get deleted out of hand. So some maybe think "fuck it" why bother!"

Like most of my messages

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Personally I can't see the problem with 'how are you messages.' Isn't the whole point of messaging finding out whether you have enough in common to take things further I.e.meet. I'd rather have that than a 'can I fuck u up the arse' message any day.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

A compliment/how are you? is a nice way to start, followed with, have a look at my profile...let me know if your interested...Some pics attached? Those sweethearts that make a lil effort, NOT an essay, stand a much better chance. 'Fancy a shag' will just get deleted.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"How are you ....or what you into...two most annoying msgs"

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By *lare GTV/TS  over a year ago

South of Sleaford

If someone sends me a "Hi how r u" message, I look at their profile. If it is merely one line which says little and they have no picture, my interest is not engaged. Judgmental of me I know but that happens all too often on here. If I do reply then often the subsequent messages are also very short and merely ask a series of questions pumping me for information. It is not a 'conversation'.

This is my experience over 3 years. However, I always try to be polite but get bored with going round the same loop where the other person reveals nothing about themselves - at all.

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By *hyllyphyllyMan  over a year ago

Bradford

What are you meant to say.

"Well my name is Phyl, and I want get into your pants"?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"What are you meant to say.

"Well my name is Phyl, and I want get into your pants"? "

That will work with some!

You cannot please all of the people all of the time, you can only hope to please some of the people some of the time!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"why do folks send lame messages? this isnt a gp's surgery! if the profile has enough info in it, just ask what u want to ask! its a swing site, does anyone who asks 'how are u?' have any imagination? oh unless they are all timewasters. if in doubt, block em!

rant over. "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I don't mind a simple 'hi, how are you message' it's exactly what you would get if you were chatting to someone in the 'real' world or in clubs. To me, it expresses initial interest, from it I can have a nosey a their profile, if they aren't what I'm looking for I say so then. Why waste time writing unique messages etc. Bit of a waste of time. Why should people jump through hoops to message me?"

I agree, it's just a conversation starter, much like a wink would be.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"A compliment/how are you? is a nice way to start, followed with, have a look at my profile...let me know if your interested...Some pics attached? Those sweethearts that make a lil effort, NOT an essay, stand a much better chance. 'Fancy a shag' will just get deleted. "

Sadly not many people on here share your view

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By *extoysareusCouple  over a year ago

kinky heaven

We always start with a wink then a how are you.

Do get confused sometimes when a wink is mistaken for a fancy a fuck.

I like a little bit if dialogue and how are you starts it off

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By *igellahestonCouple  over a year ago

Darleston

I am tempted to reply with the truth sometimes. 'the cats died, I'm skint, the kids are doing my nut, and I,m having such a heavy period I need to shove a sheep up my foof'.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I am tempted to reply with the truth sometimes. 'the cats died, I'm skint, the kids are doing my nut, and I,m having such a heavy period I need to shove a sheep up my foof'."

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I don't mind a simple 'hi, how are you message' it's exactly what you would get if you were chatting to someone in the 'real' world or in clubs. To me, it expresses initial interest, from it I can have a nosey a their profile, if they aren't what I'm looking for I say so then. Why waste time writing unique messages etc. Bit of a waste of time. Why should people jump through hoops to message me?"

Pretty much what I was going to type...I have no issue with that kind of message at all, it's an opener to express an interest and bring their profile to my attention. If the profile doesn't say much more then I'm unlikely to reply, but if the profile fits what I'm looking for then I'll reply and open up a conversation. Honestly not sure what kind of messages some people expect...if a guy is too complimentary he's treated with suspicion; too forward he's looking to shag anything that moves; sends a cut and paste he's lazy...most real life conversations start with a 'hi, you ok?' so why can't online ones be the same?!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It's a minefield approaching anyone here. I think people just need to chill out and relax. Both when sending and receiving messages!

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By *imiUKMan  over a year ago

Newbury

I couldn't care less what the topic is, as long as its interesting.

Although this is a swingers site, I find myself capable of conversing on a wide range of other topics not directly related to our sex organs/mutual gratification, and if you can't then I'd rather not hear from you.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I dont mind even a " hey" I look at the pics n profile and if I reply and the guy knows I am interested - then he can draft a bit better second message. I hate painful long first messages and when I look at the pics I think " no" I feel bad at deleting xx

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By *nttake2 OP   Couple  over a year ago

South


"why do folks send lame messages? this isnt a gp's surgery! if the profile has enough info in it, just ask what u want to ask! its a swing site, does anyone who asks 'how are u?' have any imagination? oh unless they are all timewasters. if in doubt, block em!

rant over.

Just out of interest, what kind of messages do you send out?"

polite, and to the point, but then we think we have a profile and set of pics that make our pitch clear. but never 'how are u!'

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's a minefield approaching anyone here. I think people just need to chill out and relax. Both when sending and receiving messages!

"

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By *octor DeleriumMan  over a year ago

Bristol


" 'how are u?' "

Personally, I much prefer people who are able to compose sentences rather than send me some kind of text message hybrid.

'How are u?' would, as my profile states, head straight into the trash. It's lazy and shows no imagination, whatsoever; quite like 'cock' shots, really.

Doctor Nasty

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Seems a decent message always gets deleted so why waste time composing one. Fuck it be direct

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By *iceguy25Man  over a year ago

tongbridge

I can never think what to say unless their profile gives me a topic so I keep it simple polite and when (if) they write then I get more to talk about

Also there are those that want a direct "i want to fuck " and thoughs that want a conversation first, both are fine how ever its rare to pick that out from their profile so I play safe.

Dont like that sorry for treating you as a person and not a fuck hole lol

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By *iceguy25Man  over a year ago

tongbridge


"It's a minefield approaching anyone here. I think people just need to chill out and relax. Both when sending and receiving messages!

"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

So being polite isn't required or wanted anymore then I would imagine that if you get messages just saying fancy a fuck then you complain about them too, asking how someone is, is a polite way of breaking the ice so the hostility surrounding this is just stupid

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"To be fair though. A lot us guys do spend time composing a nice opening message just to see it get deleted out of hand. So some maybe think "fuck it" why bother!"

That's exactly the reason I start with how are you. The hours I have wasted reading profiles,along sure I match what the people want and then composing a message to then see it's been deleted without even a polite no thanks, if I say how are you then the other person can look at my profile and if they want to carry on can reply and them we get down to proper messages, no inane Facebook chat.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"To be fair though. A lot us guys do spend time composing a nice opening message just to see it get deleted out of hand. So some maybe think "fuck it" why bother!

Exactly. Sometimes what works for one person will fail horribly with another. There's no such thing as a perfect message. In fact, what they write holds little significance if you're not attracted to them because it won't go any further.

Hands up those who played with someone they are not at all attracted to because they wrote a kick-ass message. "

I agree, I admit that I just copy and paste my opening messages, sometimes it works, often it doesn't but I can't be arsed tailoring every message to suit every profile

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By *risky_MareWoman  over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"Personally I don't see what the issue is ....what is wrong with someone asking how you are, isn't it a fairly polite way of instigating further conversation?

"

Exactly - they are not just saying 'How are you' they are saying, 'Hey I like the look of you if you like the look of me too could we talk some and see if we get on?' I would suggest a *minor* compliment makes it more likely to get an answer - like 'Hey, I like your mask - how are you?' (not some sycophantic drivel that is obviously bull anyway!)

Then I will look at their profile, and might thank them for the compliment and say no thanks if they seem nice people but not for me, or launch into some frivolous spiel if I want to get acquainted or even if I'm just having a rough day and feel like 'sharing' haha!!!

I still reserve the right to delete if they are totally unsuitable, 300 miles away and obviously not what I am asking for.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"why do folks send lame messages? this isnt a gp's surgery! if the profile has enough info in it, just ask what u want to ask! its a swing site, does anyone who asks 'how are u?' have any imagination? oh unless they are all timewasters. if in doubt, block em!

rant over.

Just out of interest, what kind of messages do you send out?

polite, and to the point, but then we think we have a profile and set of pics that make our pitch clear. but never 'how are u!' "

Fair point. So what would be an ideal message to yourselves?

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By *RYBBWCouple  over a year ago

Leeds.


"How are you ....or what you into...two most annoying msgs"

Or when the first message is "got any more pics ?"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"why do folks send lame messages? this isnt a gp's surgery! if the profile has enough info in it, just ask what u want to ask! its a swing site, does anyone who asks 'how are u?' have any imagination? oh unless they are all timewasters. if in doubt, block em!

rant over.

Just out of interest, what kind of messages do you send out?

polite, and to the point, but then we think we have a profile and set of pics that make our pitch clear. but never 'how are u!' "

Boring. Block!

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By *ee VianteWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

Part of attraction to me is intelligence and the ability to engage my mind. I'll not be interested in the most physically gorgeous man if he sends me a message in txtspk or poor English. I may be interested in a more 'average' man if he captures my interest with his message and profile.

It doesn't have to be a long message but "how are u?" won't inspire me.

The second message could have been the most fabulously eloquent, entertaining piece of writing ever sent but I am unlikely to find that out if the first message says "how are u?".

For one, it sends the message that they think I look ok but not worth any more than a few seconds of their time. It doesn't show if they've read my profile.

Writing a couple of lines about how they fit what I am looking for and asking if I'd like to know more is far more likely to get a positive response from me.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Part of attraction to me is intelligence and the ability to engage my mind. I'll not be interested in the most physically gorgeous man if he sends me a message in txtspk or poor English. I may be interested in a more 'average' man if he captures my interest with his message and profile.

It doesn't have to be a long message but "how are u?" won't inspire me.

The second message could have been the most fabulously eloquent, entertaining piece of writing ever sent but I am unlikely to find that out if the first message says "how are u?".

For one, it sends the message that they think I look ok but not worth any more than a few seconds of their time. It doesn't show if they've read my profile.

Writing a couple of lines about how they fit what I am looking for and asking if I'd like to know more is far more likely to get a positive response from me."

Hehe! Liar!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Just send the message you want to send, if its how are you the so be it it's up to you what you say there is no magic sentence that will garentee a meet but if there is something you don't want people to put on a message then put it on your profile, near the bottom, that way you will know if people are reading it at least

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By *ee VianteWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk


"Part of attraction to me is intelligence and the ability to engage my mind. I'll not be interested in the most physically gorgeous man if he sends me a message in txtspk or poor English. I may be interested in a more 'average' man if he captures my interest with his message and profile.

It doesn't have to be a long message but "how are u?" won't inspire me.

The second message could have been the most fabulously eloquent, entertaining piece of writing ever sent but I am unlikely to find that out if the first message says "how are u?".

For one, it sends the message that they think I look ok but not worth any more than a few seconds of their time. It doesn't show if they've read my profile.

Writing a couple of lines about how they fit what I am looking for and asking if I'd like to know more is far more likely to get a positive response from me.

Hehe! Liar!

"

Which part and on what are you basing your claim?

I think I probably know what I like better than you do.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Part of attraction to me is intelligence and the ability to engage my mind. I'll not be interested in the most physically gorgeous man if he sends me a message in txtspk or poor English. I may be interested in a more 'average' man if he captures my interest with his message and profile.

It doesn't have to be a long message but "how are u?" won't inspire me.

The second message could have been the most fabulously eloquent, entertaining piece of writing ever sent but I am unlikely to find that out if the first message says "how are u?".

For one, it sends the message that they think I look ok but not worth any more than a few seconds of their time. It doesn't show if they've read my profile.

Writing a couple of lines about how they fit what I am looking for and asking if I'd like to know more is far more likely to get a positive response from me.

Hehe! Liar!

Which part and on what are you basing your claim?

I think I probably know what I like better than you do. "

I don't...but I did know you'd take the bait!

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By *ee VianteWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk


"Part of attraction to me is intelligence and the ability to engage my mind. I'll not be interested in the most physically gorgeous man if he sends me a message in txtspk or poor English. I may be interested in a more 'average' man if he captures my interest with his message and profile.

It doesn't have to be a long message but "how are u?" won't inspire me.

The second message could have been the most fabulously eloquent, entertaining piece of writing ever sent but I am unlikely to find that out if the first message says "how are u?".

For one, it sends the message that they think I look ok but not worth any more than a few seconds of their time. It doesn't show if they've read my profile.

Writing a couple of lines about how they fit what I am looking for and asking if I'd like to know more is far more likely to get a positive response from me.

Hehe! Liar!

Which part and on what are you basing your claim?

I think I probably know what I like better than you do.

I don't...but I did know you'd take the bait! "

Bait? Accusing me of being untruthful is bait? For what? To get me to reply asking what you're on about? Oh yes, a big victory to you there. I replied! Yay! You are the champion!

*cue cheerleaders*

Do you really have nothing better to do than "bait" people with false allegations to get them to reply to you?

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By *ilthygorgeous1Couple  over a year ago

Oxford


"I am not a how are messenger, but what's the problem with it? a lot of people have seriously dull profiles u can't get anything off , so how are you is a way of letting someone know you find them interesting. Winks are frowned upon, fancy a fuck is disastrous. So how are you? Give a polite response and take it from there. "

In agreement here. Fancy a fuck is a bit much but If after opening and reading the short "How are you" msg you check the profile and you find its a hottie responsible for composing it, who cares how long it is, surely it's only an Ice breaker?

Just always try to reply even if it's a simple no as someone has plucked up the courage, taken the time,sent and is now waiting for a reply or rejection..

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I had one. Said "amazing cleavage" guess what I did? Deleted.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Just send the message you want to send, if its how are you the so be it it's up to you what you say there is no magic sentence that will garentee a meet but if there is something you don't want people to put on a message then put it on your profile, near the bottom, that way you will know if people are reading it at least"
the bit I wanted in any messages was at the bottom of my profile, didn't always appear, so I moved it, made no difference

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Just had one now......

'I'd love to fuck you while your husband watches'

Oooo.. Knickers off quick!!!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Totally agree if you have spent time reading a profile and try and open up appropriately....and it just gets deleted. ...why bother

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"why do folks send lame messages? this isnt a gp's surgery! if the profile has enough info in it, just ask what u want to ask! its a swing site, does anyone who asks 'how are u?' have any imagination? oh unless they are all timewasters. if in doubt, block em!

rant over. "

Or maybe people are using it as an once breaker. its generally how people greet each when they see them in the flesh isn't it?

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By *incs-cpl1Couple  over a year ago

Peterborough


"why do folks send lame messages? this isnt a gp's surgery! if the profile has enough info in it, just ask what u want to ask! its a swing site, does anyone who asks 'how are u?' have any imagination? oh unless they are all timewasters. if in doubt, block em!

rant over. "

Will fill in later

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"why do folks send lame messages? this isnt a gp's surgery! if the profile has enough info in it, just ask what u want to ask! its a swing site, does anyone who asks 'how are u?' have any imagination? oh unless they are all timewasters. if in doubt, block em!

rant over.

Will fill in later "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Part of attraction to me is intelligence and the ability to engage my mind. I'll not be interested in the most physically gorgeous man if he sends me a message in txtspk or poor English. I may be interested in a more 'average' man if he captures my interest with his message and profile.

It doesn't have to be a long message but "how are u?" won't inspire me.

The second message could have been the most fabulously eloquent, entertaining piece of writing ever sent but I am unlikely to find that out if the first message says "how are u?".

For one, it sends the message that they think I look ok but not worth any more than a few seconds of their time. It doesn't show if they've read my profile.

Writing a couple of lines about how they fit what I am looking for and asking if I'd like to know more is far more likely to get a positive response from me.

Hehe! Liar!

Which part and on what are you basing your claim?

I think I probably know what I like better than you do.

I don't...but I did know you'd take the bait!

Bait? Accusing me of being untruthful is bait? For what? To get me to reply asking what you're on about? Oh yes, a big victory to you there. I replied! Yay! You are the champion!

*cue cheerleaders*

Do you really have nothing better to do than "bait" people with false allegations to get them to reply to you? "

It was a joke. Never mind!

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By *ee VianteWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk


"Part of attraction to me is intelligence and the ability to engage my mind. I'll not be interested in the most physically gorgeous man if he sends me a message in txtspk or poor English. I may be interested in a more 'average' man if he captures my interest with his message and profile.

It doesn't have to be a long message but "how are u?" won't inspire me.

The second message could have been the most fabulously eloquent, entertaining piece of writing ever sent but I am unlikely to find that out if the first message says "how are u?".

For one, it sends the message that they think I look ok but not worth any more than a few seconds of their time. It doesn't show if they've read my profile.

Writing a couple of lines about how they fit what I am looking for and asking if I'd like to know more is far more likely to get a positive response from me.

Hehe! Liar!

Which part and on what are you basing your claim?

I think I probably know what I like better than you do.

I don't...but I did know you'd take the bait!

Bait? Accusing me of being untruthful is bait? For what? To get me to reply asking what you're on about? Oh yes, a big victory to you there. I replied! Yay! You are the champion!

*cue cheerleaders*

Do you really have nothing better to do than "bait" people with false allegations to get them to reply to you?

It was a joke. Never mind! "

Jokes are usually funny.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Part of attraction to me is intelligence and the ability to engage my mind. I'll not be interested in the most physically gorgeous man if he sends me a message in txtspk or poor English. I may be interested in a more 'average' man if he captures my interest with his message and profile.

It doesn't have to be a long message but "how are u?" won't inspire me.

The second message could have been the most fabulously eloquent, entertaining piece of writing ever sent but I am unlikely to find that out if the first message says "how are u?".

For one, it sends the message that they think I look ok but not worth any more than a few seconds of their time. It doesn't show if they've read my profile.

Writing a couple of lines about how they fit what I am looking for and asking if I'd like to know more is far more likely to get a positive response from me.

Hehe! Liar!

Which part and on what are you basing your claim?

I think I probably know what I like better than you do.

I don't...but I did know you'd take the bait!

Bait? Accusing me of being untruthful is bait? For what? To get me to reply asking what you're on about? Oh yes, a big victory to you there. I replied! Yay! You are the champion!

*cue cheerleaders*

Do you really have nothing better to do than "bait" people with false allegations to get them to reply to you?

It was a joke. Never mind!

Jokes are usually funny. "

Yeah, guess you're not a fan of being teased. Noted!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"asl ?

Aye well I wish I could remember what gem you sent that got you into my knickers "

"How much" lol.

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