FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Verifications
Verifications
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Old subject new slant.
I just saw a single fem profile with 2 verifications.
The first is from a guy asking the person he is verified if she will add him to his msn or mail him 
Her second verification is from a guy who says "he thinks he knows her from another site"
Surely that is using the verification system to gain an unfair advantage, for a start the person will now show up on searches people make who choose to only search for verified members.
Worse still what if she decides to hide her verifications, a single fem who may or may not be 100% genuine is going to appear to be verified when neither person doing the verifications have met her, spoken to her on the phone or cammed with her
Your thoughts ? ..... |
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I'm not personally that bothered by the verification system - perhaps because I'm not verified - but I think that some of the methods of verification are a bit bizarre. The verified by webcam and by phone both stick out to me as being strange.
I understand that "verified" means someone is supposed to be genuine (whatever that's supposed to mean) but how do you verify someone on webcam is genuine? They're genuinely a person and they genuinely have a webcam?
Same for verified by phone... it just verifies that they are able to make a phone call. Nothing more than that really.
If the person displays their verifications then that can help, but as you rightly point out, Jed, a dishonest and hidden verification appears just the same as a 'true' verification.
I think a better system would be to have a checkbox for each type of verification, instead of having the global verification... So each profile would have
Verified by phone? [Y/N]
Verified by webcam? [Y/N]
Verified in person? [Y/N]
Each time a person/couple received at least one of each type then the word 'Yes' could become bold, or the word 'No' would be greyed out, etc... Doesn't need to be a count of the number of verifications, in my opinion, as it shouldn't be seen as a popularity contest.
If the person chooses to hide their verifications then the text of their verifications would disappear but it's still possible to see if someone has only been verified by phone or by webcam and not in person. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I would agree to something along those lines.
Personally we set no store by webcam or phone verifications or for that matter hidden verifications since they coule be for the above categories.
Phone and Webcam don't give any indication to true personality, phone certainly won't confirm thier pics aren't 10 years old, cam may not confirm that "slim" or "athletic" were not classifications 500 pies ago.
They don't show true personality or much else. |
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On the subject of verifications, do you think there's any value in adding an option to see all of the verifications a user has left for other people?
The reason I ask is because sometimes when I've read a verification there's been a niggling doubt in the back of my mind about it; maybe that I've read the same thing word-for-word for another profile or that a meeting in person for someone who joined a couple of hours ago sounds suspicious.
Perhaps being able to see verifications that a user has left for others (assuming the others have published them) would allow you to gauge whether that person was a good judge of character or was just firing off verifications nilly willy.
Although I guess it could also be used in the wrong way, to stalk somebody's past meets, etc...
Any thoughts, anyone? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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no system is perfect, but the one on here is very good, aslong as you are aware that they only really say that the people are who they say they are, the single profile you mentioned does sound a bit sus, so as you often say to others, block and move on  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Don't know why people put such store in what others think to be honest.
I don't know any of you - why should I take your word for it that so and so is a good shag?!!  |
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
"Don't know why people put such store in what others think to be honest.
I don't know any of you - why should I take your word for it that so and so is a good shag?!! "
I agree
We make our own mind up..going on from cam veris though, we actually cam to show face, body shape etc, then have a chat to see if we get on......every person we have met we have picked well...so cam can pick out what the person is like. |
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By *-and-KCouple
over a year ago
Back of Beyond |
I think the only type of verification that should be allowed is the 'in peson' one. Webcam or especially phone can be staged by anyone.
Meeting in person, whether that is just socially or for play is entirely different, it shows commitment by both parties. |
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If someone wants to meet me, and they have their Verifications hidden, i ask them to show their verifications, saying they can hide them again as soon as ive seen them ..i only meet ppl verified by meets in person ..The verification system is the main reason i started using this site..all systems will be abused by some tho  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Don't know why people put such store in what others think to be honest.
I don't know any of you - why should I take your word for it that so and so is a good shag?!! "
some truth in that. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I would report it Jed, see what Admin say."
Did that straight away, I always report anything I believe may be to the detriment of the site or the members and trust Admin on past experience to make the descision.
I guess the main reason for my post was to highlight to others what "hidden verifications" could contain.
This person has been either very honest in displaying the verifications because she has nothing to hide or very stupid in thinking that they would mean anything since a wise fake would have hidden them straight away. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've got to agree with Sassy. Do you really believe all the stuff you read here? Why would you take a recommendation from someone you don't know?
Just because a member has turned up to meet someone, it doesn't guarantee that they will turn up to meet you.
We have never been let down by anyone without a verification, but have been by so called genuine members.
But I would go along with a few of the previous posters here who say only face to face verifications should be considered true.
All of our verifications are from face to face meets. Ours are hidden, but we would allow access to see them if any of our prospective friends wanted to see them.
As most of our new friends are made at clubs and parties, our veri's are more or less redundant  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Old subject new slant.
I just saw a single fem profile with 2 verifications.
The first is from a guy asking the person he is verified if she will add him to his msn or mail him
Her second verification is from a guy who says "he thinks he knows her from another site"
Surely that is using the verification system to gain an unfair advantage, for a start the person will now show up on searches people make who choose to only search for verified members.
Worse still what if she decides to hide her verifications, a single fem who may or may not be 100% genuine is going to appear to be verified when neither person doing the verifications have met her, spoken to her on the phone or cammed with her
Your thoughts ? ....."
does it matter , you read what the verie says and then decide if they are worth persuing anyway?
if the veries are all cam or we spoke to this lovely woman on the blower veries we never bother |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"we only ever veri peolpe by meeting in person"
we have met everyone we have veried .
we think its the way forward, there is no fun in cam or phone but its great meeting others |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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It's ok for the old timers like us, and the regulars to say verifications don't make a difference or that you make your own mind up, that is totally correct.
But the point of discussing these kind of things or highlighting flaws in any system is to help or enlighten the newbies that perhaps think that a verification is the be all and end all of things.
Discussing the issue shows that some people pay attention to them some don't and perhaps that alone is good for the newbies to know.
Hundreds of people join this site everyday, some will read the forums some will not, if one person learns one thing from a subject discussed here then I think it is a good thing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’s ok saying web cam verifications are useless, but if it weren’t for them nobody would be verified to leave any verifications in the first place, if it wasn’t for admin verifying people via phone or cam when the site started out then only about 2% of the site would have any meet verifications unless they travelled to the area the owners lived to meet them, while nobody takes much notice of verifications by web cam it’s a good start for people new to the scene, however I do think that phone and cam verifications should be restricted to just one per profile.
Personally speaking, we’ve met people who weren’t verified and would be happy doing so again, we don’t rely on others to do the work for us, and gut instinct is a wonderful thing.
What’s even worse is there are people out there who’d turn down even the thought of communicating with someone newish to the scene because they haven’t been verified but would then jump to meet the same people a few months down the line when others have met them and given them verifications.
Stick with gut instinct here thanks, we can still remember when we were new here ourselves and it was our 3rd meet before we had verification because the previous 2 meets weren’t verified either, these days after two meets and no verifications you’d be branded fake or someone to be avoided.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've had a meet with glowing verifications - he was a fantastic personality and wonderful lover - turn out to be monosyllabic, with a filthy house and the worst technique I have ever encountered. So frankly, I won't be bothering with verifications any more. |
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By *ipstickCouple
over a year ago
swansea |
Had the "veris" discussion at a social a couple of months ago . Lots of us thought that maybe a colour coded system would be a good idea ( i.e. red tick for phone , amber for cam and green for in person ) . You can then see at a glance what the veris consist of even if they are hidden as the ticks would appear on the profile .  |
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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago
Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else |
"Don't know why people put such store in what others think to be honest.
I don't know any of you - why should I take your word for it that so and so is a good shag?!! "
I've no idea if I'm a good shag, and I know myself very well indeed!
(I give a good handjob though) |
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One solution to the flaws in the verification system is to just scrap it. Then no one would rely on it, cheat it, abuse it, read into it.... and people would need to find ways to make their own mind up about people. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I dont think the verification system should be used in the way the OP suggested, it should only be used to actually verify that the couple, singles involved are genuine (in as much as we can tell).
Im not keen on all this rating how good we were at sex malarky - id rather people just say, they were a really nice and genuine couple, im not keen on being promoted as "a good shag - make sure you dont miss out" or that kind of thing, even though I have those kind of verifications on my own profile - you cant really tell people what to write about you can you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
Forum Mod |
"One solution to the flaws in the verification system is to just scrap it. Then no one would rely on it, cheat it, abuse it, read into it.... and people would need to find ways to make their own mind up about people."
I agree.....I can see the tidal wave of discontent rolling towards the forums if it ever happened though |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Verifications are only supposed to be a guide just like profile details, pictures and picture verifications. Surely you then chat on the phone or over the cam before deciding to proceed? Well we do anyway. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Had the "veris" discussion at a social a couple of months ago . Lots of us thought that maybe a colour coded system would be a good idea ( i.e. red tick for phone , amber for cam and green for in person ) . You can then see at a glance what the veris consist of even if they are hidden as the ticks would appear on the profile . "
Yes and we could put two ticks in pink if we spoke to them twice. Three ticks in taupe for seeing five people on cam and six ticks in orange if we met them in person. Eight ticks in turquoise if they looked like they did in a pic. Nine if they sound the same and Fifteen ticks in Indigo if you have sex. Finally twenty ticks in Violet if the sex was good.
Don't ever say I don't try. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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im still not sure about veris to be honest.
how often does someone email a person who left a veris on your profile to find out what your like?
what if that person has an axe to grind for some reason (jealously etc) gives them perfect opportunity to lie or warn others off doesnt it. |
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By *acreadCouple
over a year ago
central scotland |
We only verify cpls we have actually met
and we do take notice of verifications as they can be a good indicator if cpls are gen or not.
A web cam or phone verification cant realy tell you a cpl will actualy meet in person it can only let you know that it is a cpl. |
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By *woBiTwoCouple
over a year ago
north manchester |
veris will only tell you so much - you can take a cautious approach and only contact people with a good mix of meet-veris over many months, or use common sense and speak to newbies on the phone, before meeting socially to chat before arranging a play session. Works for us. |
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"The new Beta browse function enables you to search specifically for members who have had a "meet in person" verification.
http://www.fabswingers.com/browse/advanced"
Well there's progress! "in person" meets are the only ones I pay any heed to.
Going right back to the OP, this thing about "knowing her from another site" is interesting.
In the big wide world you take your credit rating from one bank to another. If you're good or bad with money, all the banks will know about you for you you are because they pool their information.
With swingers also usually belonging to more than one site, I wonder if the owners of the "main" sites wouldn't benefit from pooling their verifications info? That way if you've been as good as gold on xyz.com and are well liked and respected, and you come onto this site, you can get instant recognition instead of having to start from scratch again. Just a thought. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The new Beta browse function enables you to search specifically for members who have had a "meet in person" verification.
http://www.fabswingers.com/browse/advanced
Well there's progress! "in person" meets are the only ones I pay any heed to.
Going right back to the OP, this thing about "knowing her from another site" is interesting.
In the big wide world you take your credit rating from one bank to another. If you're good or bad with money, all the banks will know about you for you you are because they pool their information.
With swingers also usually belonging to more than one site, I wonder if the owners of the "main" sites wouldn't benefit from pooling their verifications info? That way if you've been as good as gold on xyz.com and are well liked and respected, and you come onto this site, you can get instant recognition instead of having to start from scratch again. Just a thought."
Actually the bit about credit ratings is a valid one. Sadly because swinging and other sexually related activities are frowned on people keep their identities private. It would be good to have an online swinging passport similar to the MSN one but even that would be abused by some. So with reflection you just have to read other peoples opinions and make your own judgements when meeting people. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Verifications can speak volumes when they don't have one ...... more than a year on site, no verifications for real meets, friends list as long as your arm.
Be afraid, be very afraid .... giggles |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Verifications can speak volumes when they don't have one ...... more than a year on site, no verifications for real meets, friends list as long as your arm.
Be afraid, be very afraid .... giggles "
I totally agree, avoid them like the plague  |
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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago
near kings lynn |
"The new Beta browse function enables you to search specifically for members who have had a "meet in person" verification.
http://www.fabswingers.com/browse/advanced
Well there's progress! "in person" meets are the only ones I pay any heed to.
Going right back to the OP, this thing about "knowing her from another site" is interesting.
In the big wide world you take your credit rating from one bank to another. If you're good or bad with money, all the banks will know about you for you you are because they pool their information.
With swingers also usually belonging to more than one site, I wonder if the owners of the "main" sites wouldn't benefit from pooling their verifications info? That way if you've been as good as gold on xyz.com and are well liked and respected, and you come onto this site, you can get instant recognition instead of having to start from scratch again. Just a thought."
I see that as a good idea but am sure it could still be abused in some way.
My verfication list would be miles long if I added all those from my previous site!!! Embarrasing  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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well some have singles profiles here meet and cant show there verificaitons and tell you after thay have Fuck buddies and would kill them if thay found out ..... makes you think. lol whos the mug here.  jo xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Verifications can speak volumes when they don't have one ...... more than a year on site, no verifications for real meets, friends list as long as your arm.
Be afraid, be very afraid .... giggles
I totally agree, avoid them like the plague "
I dont agree,we met a guy on here a while ago,no veri's no pics,he emailed us a pic and we arranged to meet the guy turned up on time and was one of the nicest guys you could meet..
When i asked him why he had not met anyone of here he said because the longer you are on here with no veri's the more people doubt you are genuine as people are too hung up on veri's.. Which is true.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm not personally that bothered by the verification system - perhaps because I'm not verified - but I think that some of the methods of verification are a bit bizarre. The verified by webcam and by phone both stick out to me as being strange.
I understand that "verified" means someone is supposed to be genuine (whatever that's supposed to mean) but how do you verify someone on webcam is genuine? They're genuinely a person and they genuinely have a webcam?
Same for verified by phone... it just verifies that they are able to make a phone call. Nothing more than that really.
If the person displays their verifications then that can help, but as you rightly point out, Jed, a dishonest and hidden verification appears just the same as a 'true' verification.
I think a better system would be to have a checkbox for each type of verification, instead of having the global verification... So each profile would have
Verified by phone? [Y/N]
Verified by webcam? [Y/N]
Verified in person? [Y/N]
Each time a person/couple received at least one of each type then the word 'Yes' could become bold, or the word 'No' would be greyed out, etc... Doesn't need to be a count of the number of verifications, in my opinion, as it shouldn't be seen as a popularity contest.
If the person chooses to hide their verifications then the text of their verifications would disappear but it's still possible to see if someone has only been verified by phone or by webcam and not in person."
I suggested a similar thing sometime bace, I suggested that the Veri symbol should have a M for meeting, C for Cam or P for Phone, that way Veri's could be hidden but People would still know what type of Veri you had, very simple and easy to use. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Verifications can speak volumes when they don't have one ...... more than a year on site, no verifications for real meets, friends list as long as your arm.
Be afraid, be very afraid .... giggles
I totally agree, avoid them like the plague
I dont agree,we met a guy on here a while ago,no veri's no pics,he emailed us a pic and we arranged to meet the guy turned up on time and was one of the nicest guys you could meet..
When i asked him why he had not met anyone of here he said because the longer you are on here with no veri's the more people doubt you are genuine as people are too hung up on veri's.. Which is true.."
Agree 100% with you!
I've met several men from here without verifications: their initial message to me was spot on. Telephone calls and social meets followed and a good time continues to be had by all.
I didn't ask about verifications, as to be honest I could care less. I've got to the ripe old age of 50 making my own decisions and choosing friends and playmates without needing a verification system.
If others need confirmation from others before they play - that's their choice - me? I trust my own judgement! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Verifications can speak volumes when they don't have one ...... more than a year on site, no verifications for real meets, friends list as long as your arm.
Be afraid, be very afraid .... giggles
I totally agree, avoid them like the plague
I dont agree,we met a guy on here a while ago,no veri's no pics,he emailed us a pic and we arranged to meet the guy turned up on time and was one of the nicest guys you could meet..
When i asked him why he had not met anyone of here he said because the longer you are on here with no veri's the more people doubt you are genuine as people are too hung up on veri's.. Which is true..
Agree 100% with you!
I've met several men from here without verifications: their initial message to me was spot on. Telephone calls and social meets followed and a good time continues to be had by all.
I didn't ask about verifications, as to be honest I could care less. I've got to the ripe old age of 50 making my own decisions and choosing friends and playmates without needing a verification system.
If others need confirmation from others before they play - that's their choice - me? I trust my own judgement!"
The verification system is not 100% perfect, however from my point of view its one of the est aspects of this site and its a good indicator on how genuine a person is or not. |
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
"Verifications can speak volumes when they don't have one ...... more than a year on site, no verifications for real meets, friends list as long as your arm.
Be afraid, be very afraid .... giggles
I totally agree, avoid them like the plague
I dont agree,we met a guy on here a while ago,no veri's no pics,he emailed us a pic and we arranged to meet the guy turned up on time and was one of the nicest guys you could meet..
When i asked him why he had not met anyone of here he said because the longer you are on here with no veri's the more people doubt you are genuine as people are too hung up on veri's.. Which is true.."
Ah I am with you on this one, we have met people without veri's too and had great meets.
Everyone has to start somewhere.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"well some have singles profiles here meet and cant show there verificaitons and tell you after thay have Fuck buddies and would kill them if thay found out ..... makes you think. lol whos the mug here. jo xx"
now i can understand that. some people do get jealous of who you see even if you are single yourself  |
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By *emjoCouple
over a year ago
Reading |
We met a couple recently who were unfriendly and downright rude at a party. So rude in fact we had to leave. There verification for the same party by another couple said how wonderful they were. The moral,.. don't believe everything you read. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"well some have singles profiles here meet and cant show there verificaitons and tell you after thay have Fuck buddies and would kill them if thay found out ..... makes you think. lol whos the mug here. jo xx
now i can understand that. some people do get jealous of who you see even if you are single yourself "
it hurts me to think thay have me as a friends like to see me and wish to do all sorts but hide me here. cant show my feedback as up set old play mates. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i dont mind cam but not the phone verfiy that should be got rid of anybody can go on and say its them "
They can on cam too...unless you ask for relevant forms of ID??? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"well some have singles profiles here meet and cant show there verificaitons and tell you after thay have Fuck buddies and would kill them if thay found out ..... makes you think. lol whos the mug here. jo xx
now i can understand that. some people do get jealous of who you see even if you are single yourself "
I'm single and I show all my verifications. This is a swinging site...I'm swinging. If someone gets jealous over it then they can go elsewhere. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"well some have singles profiles here meet and cant show there verificaitons and tell you after thay have Fuck buddies and would kill them if thay found out ..... makes you think. lol whos the mug here. jo xx
now i can understand that. some people do get jealous of who you see even if you are single yourself
I'm single and I show all my verifications. This is a swinging site...I'm swinging. If someone gets jealous over it then they can go elsewhere. "
I feel like you its a swing site there friends know this thats why all here to have fun. |
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