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Sexual Orientaion Change?
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Good Day everyone. I was having a discussion last evening with my wife as to whether a persons sexual orientation can change?
There are many many couples on this site who have a Bi or Bi curious female or male for that matter, or both.
My question is; Did these people initially enter the swinging scene as what they would consider as "straight", then change there attitude and preference and became a bisexual?
Any input or experiences much appreciated Guy |
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Change of orientation ? i'd say no . having permission to freely explore a side of you that was already there is more likely .also dont forget many use the Bi or Bi curious label as a marketing tool as it attracts more _iews and therefore more eventual meets. ive met enough couples who fess up and admit the bi thing isnt really there but they dont mind being touched up a bit if it means they can have good night with a couple they fancy . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'd say in the true sense your orientation cannot change. You will always be attracted to whomever, ie heterosexual, homosexual. However sex is just lust and its just to a sexual act.
I am heterosexual - but I've had sexual experiences with women, I am not attracted to women at all, in a play situation I am enjoying it.
That's why when people on the forum say to a guy, you've sucked a man, ooo your bisexual now, that's it forever, start wearing velvet pantaloons and frilly shirts and make sure you change your profile, I don't agree.
Sex is just a moment in time, your sexuality is not.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" start wearing velvet pantaloons and frilly shirts "
is that what gay and bi people are wearing these days ?
fkin 'ell i'd better bin these rugby shirts and jeans if i want some quality cock   |
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No i'd say not. I've known i was bi from a very young age and had my first bi experience at 15. My husband is straight and that will never change it's the way he is.
I have seen people's profiles change their orientation but i am guessing that this is to please someone else or to have a better chance of more meets. |
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"Good Day everyone. I was having a discussion last evening with my wife as to whether a persons sexual orientation can change?
There are many many couples on this site who have a Bi or Bi curious female or male for that matter, or both.
My question is; Did these people initially enter the swinging scene as what they would consider as "straight", then change there attitude and preference and became a bisexual?
Any input or experiences much appreciated Guy"
In my opinion it can yes. Experimentation can lead to realisation (accepting that you may have had fantasies etc before) as you have not experienced bisexual fun then you cant have previously been aware whether this is something you enjoy or whether it was just a fantasy.
Mistress x |
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By *TUNNAWoman
over a year ago
glasgow |
mines has changed from bi
to Straight as when i join
i wanted 2 try my bi side out
tryed but i like boaby
to much tho bi wasnt bad but u know
its like ive tryed now im not curious
anymore xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" start wearing velvet pantaloons and frilly shirts
is that what gay and bi people are wearing these days ?
fkin 'ell i'd better bin these rugby shirts and jeans if i want some quality cock "
Yes you're doing it all wrong lol. Gays men are always the best dressed, knock spots off the hetero guys (disclaimer - I'm not in the least homophobic and no offence was meant to any straight pantaloon wearers or gay rugger shirted guys) |
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No,what can change is peoples willingness to try new things.
i personally get annoyed by women who say they are bi but only in a play context,i'd call that openminded.
Basically there is not a great deal of differnce in mouths,wether it is a man sucking a man or a woman going down on a woman,it does not feel that different.
Bi to me means findng both sexes attractive,reguardless of wether you are having sex.i am far more likely to perve a pretty woman on the street than a bloke.i have upon occasion described myself as pan sexual because it is people i find attractive and their gender is not really that important.
Or maybe i'm just a slut |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Good Day everyone. I was having a discussion last evening with my wife as to whether a persons sexual orientation can change?
There are many many couples on this site who have a Bi or Bi curious female or male for that matter, or both.
My question is; Did these people initially enter the swinging scene as what they would consider as "straight", then change there attitude and preference and became a bisexual?
Any input or experiences much appreciated Guy
In my opinion it can yes. Experimentation can lead to realisation (accepting that you may have had fantasies etc before) as you have not experienced bisexual fun then you cant have previously been aware whether this is something you enjoy or whether it was just a fantasy.
Mistress x"
Yes I can see it from this _iewpoint too. Your orientation can be homosexual even if you've never had sex with a guy. I don't class what happens in the swinging world as being truly representative of your sexual orientation. Swinging is a surreal fantasy for me. If I wasn't a swinger, I would never have sex with women |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" start wearing velvet pantaloons and frilly shirts
is that what gay and bi people are wearing these days ?
fkin 'ell i'd better bin these rugby shirts and jeans if i want some quality cock
Yes you're doing it all wrong lol. Gays men are always the best dressed, knock spots off the hetero guys (disclaimer - I'm not in the least homophobic and no offence was meant to any straight pantaloon wearers or gay rugger shirted guys)"
maybe i should mix 'n' match ? |
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"Good Day everyone. I was having a discussion last evening with my wife as to whether a persons sexual orientation can change?
There are many many couples on this site who have a Bi or Bi curious female or male for that matter, or both.
My question is; Did these people initially enter the swinging scene as what they would consider as "straight", then change there attitude and preference and became a bisexual?
Any input or experiences much appreciated Guy
In my opinion it can yes. Experimentation can lead to realisation (accepting that you may have had fantasies etc before) as you have not experienced bisexual fun then you cant have previously been aware whether this is something you enjoy or whether it was just a fantasy.
Mistress x
Yes I can see it from this _iewpoint too. Your orientation can be homosexual even if you've never had sex with a guy. I don't class what happens in the swinging world as being truly representative of your sexual orientation. Swinging is a surreal fantasy for me. If I wasn't a swinger, I would never have sex with women "
That is true for me too which is why I dont consider myself bisexual. I have no interest in a romantic relationship with another woman, just a little cheeky fun.
Mistress x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
That is true for me too which is why I dont consider myself bisexual. I have no interest in a romantic relationship with another woman, just a little cheeky fun.
Mistress x"
My curiosity started from an early age but other than a couple of fumbles with lads as a teenager, I didn't go near another bloke til I was in my early 30's
I am bi / cock curious. I often look at a bloke and wonder what his cock is like.
Even now, meeting a guy for sex is 1 thing, actually having emotional feelings for a bloke is a whole different matter.
So I deffo do fancy men but I don't think I could ever fall in love with a bloke.
Not sure what it makes me, but I just know my (our) current situation works for me (us). |
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"Good Day everyone. I was having a discussion last evening with my wife as to whether a persons sexual orientation can change?
There are many many couples on this site who have a Bi or Bi curious female or male for that matter, or both.
My question is; Did these people initially enter the swinging scene as what they would consider as "straight", then change there attitude and preference and became a bisexual?
Any input or experiences much appreciated Guy
In my opinion it can yes. Experimentation can lead to realisation (accepting that you may have had fantasies etc before) as you have not experienced bisexual fun then you cant have previously been aware whether this is something you enjoy or whether it was just a fantasy.
Mistress x
Yes I can see it from this _iewpoint too. Your orientation can be homosexual even if you've never had sex with a guy. I don't class what happens in the swinging world as being truly representative of your sexual orientation. Swinging is a surreal fantasy for me. If I wasn't a swinger, I would never have sex with women "
You see i wish more women would be open about that,there almost seems to be an obligation to tick the bi curious box,just cos u arent going to have a fit of the vapours if a woman goes near you.For me sex with a woman is best if it involves kissing,touching and mutual exploration,which is rarely the case with someone who is "situationally bi" |
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"Sex is just a moment in time, your sexuality is not.
"
What a great line, I can see that becoming one of my favourite quotes in the future
My only sexual interest in another guy is during a session within the swinging hobby provided the interest is mutual. Outside of the hobby I'm 100% heterosexual, never 'fancied' a bloke ever and don't expect to in the future.
Bi-Curious... of course I was at one time and now I'm not having been there a few times. The result of that is the prospect of it is less exciting than it used to be when it was unknown territory. So for a bit of self-analysing I'd say I'm a hell of a long way short of homosexual and not a true bi-sexual for that matter. So I wouldn't see myself as changing sexual orientation but I can take it or leave it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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well myself miss p, i,ve known i was bi along time.. i do love playing with men and women. i enjoy both. mr p well before meeting me he had only played with men orally with a female there too. were as now he definatey say's fully bi as he does actually have sex with men since meeting me. but then he would not have sex with a man alone where as i would a woman.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'd say in the true sense your orientation cannot change. You will always be attracted to whomever, ie heterosexual, homosexual. However sex is just lust and its just to a sexual act.
I am heterosexual - but I've had sexual experiences with women, I am not attracted to women at all, in a play situation I am enjoying it.
That's why when people on the forum say to a guy, you've sucked a man, ooo your bisexual now, that's it forever, start wearing velvet pantaloons and frilly shirts and make sure you change your profile, I don't agree.
Sex is just a moment in time, your sexuality is not.
"
going to knick that quote above and so true, i have found many couples on here say they are straight then i get contacted by them to play mm or mmf where all are bi, also alot of women on here are pillow princesses just doing it to please their blokes, not my words but other couples i have met complain about it as alot are not truly bi women just playing to appease.
you cant change you are what you are, all ive seen this site do is give people the chance to explore their fantasys and see if they really would like to play with the opposite sex.
Im greedy not bi lol but dont have a tab for that!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Bi to me means findng both sexes attractive,reguardless of wether you are having sex.i am far more likely to perve a pretty woman on the street than a bloke.
"
That's what it means to me too and i totally agree  |
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"
Bi to me means findng both sexes attractive,reguardless of wether you are having sex.i am far more likely to perve a pretty woman on the street than a bloke.
That's what it means to me too and i totally agree "
And that is the problem with the 'label' Bi-sexual, its a term that is used very loosely, by some more so than others.
As has been mentioned, we have often found that so-called bi-fems are nothing of the sort really, as all it means is 'I might touch another fems tit' or the like.
Seems to me a lot of profiles carry the 'bi-fem' label because its the fashion rather than a fact, like 'non-smoking' and 'safe-sex only' |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It irritates me when I say that a woman has had oral sex with me and that my guy has had oral sex with another guy, too many people on here are then saying, "you've got straight on my profile"!. you must be in denial!!
No neither of us are in denial at all, our sexual orientation is heterosexual. Outside of swinging neither of us have had romantic liaisons with members of the same sex and neither would we. We are just open minded about sex.
People can seem to grasp the concept that you really can be straight but have been in an orgy situation and had a sexual experience with members of the same sex. In an orgy situation its all a bundle of arms and legs, to me its just sex, its not how I define myself in real life.
Both of us are very clear about where our sexual and romantic interests lie in the main and dont define it by what happened for a brief 10 minutes at a party |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hi, I have always been straight but over the last few years have become more open and now would consider myself orally bi curious - though yet to be tested. I would like to experience oral from a couple at the same time - a little fantasy of mine oh and being taken by a lady with a strap on strangely appeals......Well thats let the cat out of the bag !! |
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By *waymanMan
over a year ago
newcastle |
Is your orientation fixed, like the compass points around a weather vane, or free to move in the wind like the weather vane's pointer? That's the real question, to me.
I like Jem's concept of pan sexuality. I suppose the first question is 'Do I fancy you?' not 'What's your gender?' For me, the first question is qualified - 'Do I fancy you and would it work?' I might fancy Jem, but if she was a domme it wouldn't work.... |
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
People are encouraged to read profiles, match yourself to compatible people and take it from there....
Sexual orientation is a major factor in that...
Then bi guys are flamed for writing to straight folks...
Dammed if you do... Dammed if you don't quite get it right as the profile might be wrong.
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We are both Bi on our profile but neither of us finds the same sex attractive, but in a swinginging situation we are happy to go with the flow... been there done that so to speak, would I meet a Bi/Gay guy 1 on 1? No but in a group situation then I dont have a problem with it. MrsH admitts to being a bit of a pillow princess, enjoys the touching, kissing, recieving with another female more than the giving, although she is pretty good with a strap on. We are also more than happy to play it straight with people we meet, because we are bi does not mean we are going to jump on anyone who is straight. Often see it on many profiles.. straight guys only no bi or gay. Having said that we still get lots of messages off couples whos profile says that but ours says we are both bi.. too many lables in swinging unfortunatly. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks Ladies and Gents for some very informative and enlightening _iews.
Guy & Suzie x"
Agreed. This has been the most sensible, informative and constructive thread I have read on these Forums. Well done all. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't think your true preferences change, but with experience you do broaden your horizons for a fuller picture and a more inclusive and enjoyable experience. It's all about respect for the people you are with, respecting them and their boundaries, as you would have them respect you and yours. And also as you mature and your experiences increase you do lose some of your inhibitions. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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im the same i enjoy playing with other men but im not attracted to men, i would not want a relationship with a guy, i must be hetrosexual, but you dont get that option on the profile |
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Interesting topic! With some interesting answers...
We started playing so Mrs P could explore her bi feelings originally, she very much enjoys exploring everything that is bi fem play. However this is not really a change as she has always been attracted to other girls, aswell as having some fumbling experiences as a teenager. It did come as abit of a shock when we discovered the whole 'pillow princess' issue! She was under the impression anyone with bi against their name would enjoy all things bi not just the receiving bit!
How naive were we!? Lol
I don't get the theory of 'a mouth is a mouth so what does it matter'. I am straight, for me to play with someone I have to be attracted to them. If someone is sucking me, I look at them and it's a fella then I'm not going to be attracted to them! Which means my erection is going to disappear! For us you have to have sexual attraction to play surely? Ok if it's an orgy and you don't see the person doing the sucking I can see that working but then orgies aren't our thing lol.
Here's one for someone to explain!
Female family friend, married 6 years, 4 kids. Sexually adventurous prior to that with only men.
Confesses to never having fantasised about women, no experiences with women.
6 months ago, announced she was leaving as she's realised she's a lesbian!?
She now pretends to vomit every time someone mentions cock.
That's all fine, her life, her choice. However.... We don't get it? How can you go from one extreme to the other? With nothing in-between?
Please don't miss interpret my post it's not a criticism it's a quandary is all, just trying to understand.
Mr has a theory just interested in what others think.
As an aside the girl mentioned is not a swinger as far as we know. Shame really lol.
*Him* |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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What's a pillow princess? Is it a woman who just enjoys receiving from another woman.
If it is then that's me.
If I'm in a play situation and the other woman has asked to lick me and if I'm in a club and a woman has asked if she can lick me (which strangely I've had on quite a few occasions) then if they are friendly and I find them attractive then ill probably let them. I enjoy it because I love oral, it doesn't give me a burning desire to do it back - that's how I know I'm not bisexual, I'm just sexually adventurous at times |
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"What's a pillow princess? Is it a woman who just enjoys receiving from another woman.
If it is then that's me.
If I'm in a play situation and the other woman has asked to lick me and if I'm in a club and a woman has asked if she can lick me (which strangely I've had on quite a few occasions) then if they are friendly and I find them attractive then ill probably let them. I enjoy it because I love oral, it doesn't give me a burning desire to do it back - that's how I know I'm not bisexual, I'm just sexually adventurous at times "
We would call that sexually adventurous aswell. Lol
But you are not claiming to be bi. Our take on it is if you claim to be bi then at least sexually you enjoy both sexes equally.
It is frustrating for Mrs P when another woman has claimed to be bi and then will only receive and not return the gesture. Not just with oral but it can be in any way.
If it's known beforehand then that's fine I think the issue is when people deceive others. |
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Thinking about it, the club situation you mentioned adds another dimension to it. I think what I said above applies much more to private meets.
In a club asking to lick someone would surely mean that you don't neccesarily expect anything in return. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm one of those that don't get this "fluid sexuality". Perhaps it's because I find group sex unappealing. I can't imagine any situation where I'd want to be touched or touch another woman.
What has been apparent from reading this thread is a kind of "smugness" if that's the right word in being "cool, adventurous and open/broad minded" and those that don't want same sex interaction of any kind are narrow minded!
I've lost count of the number of threads I've come across slagging of bi/bi-curious guys that have straight as their sexual orientation and people are taken to task for not reading profiles: how are they to know who to contact if people change the goal posts after every meet?!!
People are of course allowed to describe themselves as they wish without ridicule and that includes those of us happy and unashamed to state 100% straight with no ambiguity at all!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I am gay. I was born gay and gay is the way that I will be for the rest of my life. However, if the opportunity arose for me to play with a guy while his gf or wife watched then that would be ok...infact it would be a turn on. If she wanted to join in then thats ok too but I have never tried it yet so I'm not sure whether I would like it or not. I have to find a woman really attractive to want to be with her. I have not found that woman yet!!
I believe that some people wish to explore their sexuality, so they may watch some gay porn and like it. And then maybe start chatting to some men and then maybe meet. It is only after that meet when they decide to be straight or bi. I don't think that anyone, after a bi experience, can become gay because it is something that you know you and no matter how hard you try it cannot be taken away.
If you're straight, you're straight. If you're gay, you're gay. And if you're bi, you're bi....it's as simple at that!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I know I am straight ever since I was 13. I adore the male form, and the female form does nothing for me.
Lesbo porn does nothing for me, however, I can get very hot and bothered watching gay porn!  |
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