FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Implausible no show excuses
Implausible no show excuses
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Having just received the most implausible reason for not showing up for a meet it occurred to me to wonder what is the most implausible reasons other members have received? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Broke the zipper on my trousers can't get them off.
I'm pregnant.
Sorry lost my signal.
I think you are married.
The car won't start.
Gotta do the washing.
I've been arrested.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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From single guy
Got a girl pregnant and she told me just before our meet.
We met that single guy again a few years later and he did now have a kid so maybe just bad timing.
Although after that , a year later, he cancelled another meet so we had our suspicions that he was a sperm donor 
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Having just received the most implausible reason for not showing up for a meet it occurred to me to wonder what is the most implausible reasons other members have received?"
OP what was the reason you were given? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Having just received the most implausible reason for not showing up for a meet it occurred to me to wonder what is the most implausible reasons other members have received?
OP what was the reason you were given?"
nosey |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Having just received the most implausible reason for not showing up for a meet it occurred to me to wonder what is the most implausible reasons other members have received?
OP what was the reason you were given?"
A family member had unexpectedly arrived from the USA lol |
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I broke my phone
I broke my leg/hand
My car won't start (But managed to get verified by someone else that night)
I'm worried my cock is too small!!
I got arrested.
I had a car accident.
My car broke down.
All better than not just turning up
  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Having just received the most implausible reason for not showing up for a meet it occurred to me to wonder what is the most implausible reasons other members have received?
OP what was the reason you were given?
A family member had unexpectedly arrived from the USA lol"
that seems plausible |
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By *inkySeeKinkyDoWoman
over a year ago
'tween PontyCarlo & CasVegas in West Yorks |
Car accidents on the way are prevalent for fabsters...perhaps it's all the motorway flashing and dogging in laybys that makes fabsters higher risk 
Also every bugger has a dog that needs emergency treatment and sometimes its not even their own, its their Exes/Aunties/Grandmas...id rather not think about that link to fabsters though  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Oh yes forgot the dying or sick relative.
And ..I didn't wake up!"
yes the klein-Levin syndrome I had a work colleague who had that ....got sacked in the end |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Least you got an excuse, mine was a no show and it was bloody freezing! He'd sent me a message at the time we were supposed to be meeting saying that i should've given him my number and surely i hadn't gone! No reason though! Oh and he took me off his friends list  which is ok as i would've done the same |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Having just received the most implausible reason for not showing up for a meet it occurred to me to wonder what is the most implausible reasons other members have received?
OP what was the reason you were given?
A family member had unexpectedly arrived from the USA lolthat seems plausible "
true perhaps I am being too judgemental |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes fabbers appear to be extremely prone to car problems "
Some can't recall which car they own...Either that or its 3 and the choice was to distressing to make |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We’ve cancelled plenty of times
The gearbox blew up on the car whilst driving there - it was a Peugeot so perfectly feasible.
Our puppy was really not well one night so no way was we leaving him.
Unexpected family shenanigans
Believe it or not people....real life does still happen outside of swinging |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Having just received the most implausible reason for not showing up for a meet it occurred to me to wonder what is the most implausible reasons other members have received?
OP what was the reason you were given?
A family member had unexpectedly arrived from the USA lolthat seems plausible
true perhaps I am being too judgemental "
maybe and the thing is if you show compassion she may Dane to meet you again but turn up |
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A couple mentioned that they were very enthusiastic about licking pussy. We mentioned that we'd being having a lot of sex recently, so whilst they are welcome to try - they shouldn't be surprised if there's some cum up in there. When the day of the meet came they said they didn't expect such crude language from us and won't be coming. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’ve actually had to cancel a meet before due to my back pain. I need to take painkillers for it (and physiotherapy!) and my tablets knock me out. They must have thought I was having it on!
Thankfully, I’ve never had anyone cancel on me. Yet. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I,'ve had
I left my phone at my dad's 50 miles away, I have to go and get it
And
My aunty is in hospital dying back home, it's my last chance to see her I have to go (she was better the next day)
And
My dad is ill I have to go and fetch him I can't do tomorrow, however the next day the man got angry with me when I said I could no longer come as I made other plans!!
These were all different men
XXX |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Having just received the most implausible reason for not showing up for a meet it occurred to me to wonder what is the most implausible reasons other members have received?
OP what was the reason you were given?
A family member had unexpectedly arrived from the USA lol"
maybe they borrowed trumps jet and got here ultra quick
that one could be true you know !! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A couple mentioned that they were very enthusiastic about licking pussy. We mentioned that we'd being having a lot of sex recently, so whilst they are welcome to try - they shouldn't be surprised if there's some cum up in there. When the day of the meet came they said they didn't expect such crude language from us and won't be coming. "
you should shower the cum out ?? |
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"Stuck in supermarket. There's an armed raid happening....
Said it was Sainsburys... I was in Sainsbury's lol.
We're you robbing it? "
I love you, Pumpkin.
I love you, Honey Bunny.
Everybody be cool this is a robbery! |
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By *hingy2Woman
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
"We’ve cancelled plenty of times
The gearbox blew up on the car whilst driving there - it was a Peugeot so perfectly feasible.
Our puppy was really not well one night so no way was we leaving him.
Unexpected family shenanigans
Believe it or not people....real life does still happen outside of swinging "
I agree .... I've had the same ...car trouble.... flat tyres ( I'm always getting them does my head in!!!!!) my teenage daughter or myself are unwell...at least I say when I can't make it!!
I've been stood up a few times with no message/text to let me know |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wish I had been given a reason, I just get people go quiet on me
One guy was really up for a meet and told me to get to his as soon as I could, when I asked where his was I got no reply |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Stuck in supermarket. There's an armed raid happening....
Said it was Sainsburys... I was in Sainsbury's lol.
We're you robbing it? "
I should have just to make her story more believable.. |
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By *adyJayneWoman
over a year ago
Burnleyish (She/They) |
As someone else has said. Real life happens.
I've genuinely broken my hand and my foot in recent years.
Cars break down.
And yes I have had family turn up who live in America, they have loads of friends and family across the world and work internationally so don't always tell us when they are coming. |
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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago
harrow |
I actually had a car accident on he way to a meet before. Still went to the meet. Then the car got written off 3 days later 
I think the last time I pulled out of a meet, was actually I had to work late. I did apologise and made up for it.
For me I tend to meet at clubs so that means that I know I am going to be there. |
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I had a social cancelled on me on Tuesday of this week; I messaged her to say I was good to go for our meet the next day, but she replied that 'her washing machine had just broken on her, and she would have to wait in for a new one to arrive, sorry'. That's the best one I've had to date  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Best reason thus far
I’m at the end of your road but I don’t feel safe leaving the car... don’t trust the area !
Pmsl I apparently live in Beirut  "
lots of arabs in your area ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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One loser said his nephew had been taken into hospital and he was looking after his sister's other children. Now this could have been true so I gave him the benefit of the doubt and a month or so later tried again, however he must have forgotten he'd already used the hospital excuse because he used it again, this time his son.
I'd never wish hospital on anyone, let alone use my family as an excuse in such a way, disgusting to be honest. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wish I had been given a reason, I just get people go quiet on me
One guy was really up for a meet and told me to get to his as soon as I could, when I asked where his was I got no reply "
I was going to say fake profile probably a woman but then that wouldn't fit with going quiet...so you must be right. It was a guy |
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"I wish I had been given a reason, I just get people go quiet on me
One guy was really up for a meet and told me to get to his as soon as I could, when I asked where his was I got no reply "
If I had told you to get to mine as quickly as possible, I would have come and collected ya x |
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We had arranged a meet and I had been cleaning the bathroom earlier in the day and put Limescale stuff in it and forgotten......I then had a shower and it got in my eyes and looked a state, they wouldn’t stop stinging !!
So I cancelled saying got Viakal in my eyes.....it sounded like bullshit but really wasn’t!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Best reason thus far
I’m at the end of your road but I don’t feel safe leaving the car... don’t trust the area !
Pmsl I apparently live in Beirut "
I'm actually howling at this hahaha x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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From a couple- they were 'dying to meet me' even before I put any pics up, shortly after I joined. On the day of the meet, couple hours before- male fell off a ladder and broke some bones, female doesn't drive. They kept checking my profile though until I blocked them. It may have been true, but... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Drove all the way to Sale from London.... booked hotel ..... text to see what time she was coming and she told me she'd fell on her heels and broken her ankle..... no proof though.
But put a diary entry up for someone to join me in the hotel..... and that was the first time i had sex with my then fwb..... happy ending |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This blokes wife did not realize i had a short back and sides on my head so will have too cancel After sending pics 3 days previous?
On the day of meeting yours wifes tits are to big on the other hand my wifes not fussed about size of tits she likes all sizes.
Computer stopped working and finding it hard to read on phone so have to cancel tonight then been blocked us. After days of talking and getting on really well
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"As someone else has said. Real life happens.
I've genuinely broken my hand and my foot in recent years.
Cars break down.
And yes I have had family turn up who live in America, they have loads of friends and family across the world and work internationally so don't always tell us when they are coming. "
What would they do if you weren't in? |
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"A relative dying is always a favourite. Makes it difficult to have a go...
I have cancelled 2 meets due to relatives dying. Not really that implausible "
You have 241 meets on here though, so that's less than 1% of your meets. I bet the % of people with no verifications having a 'relative die' around the time they are due to get their first meet / verification is a lot more than 1%!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My big toe fell off and I had no cotton to sew it back on so had to go to Asda for some cotton. Asda was shut so had to go to an all night garage and bled to death on the way. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My big toe fell off and I had no cotton to sew it back on so had to go to Asda for some cotton. Asda was shut so had to go to an all night garage and bled to death on the way. "
What a hero for letting you know while he was dead. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Has anyone ever been honest and just said, 'I’ve changed my mind; I don’t feel like meeting you anymore'?
And is there anything whatsoever wrong with this?
Maybe less people would make up implausible excuses if they thought they wouldn’t be bitched about for being truthful? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Has anyone ever been honest and just said, 'I’ve changed my mind; I don’t feel like meeting you anymore'?
And is there anything whatsoever wrong with this?
Maybe less people would make up implausible excuses if they thought they wouldn’t be bitched about for being truthful?"
We did this though not so bluntly. Had agreed to a social but wasn’t really feeling it. For one reason or another the couple weren’t what we were ideally looking for. We’d not had a meet in a few years and just wanted to ease our way back.
Needless to say, they threw a strop and told us never to contact them again...
Fair enough I guess. It does mean that we won’t meet anyone if we are not 100% sure now. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Has anyone ever been honest and just said, 'I’ve changed my mind; I don’t feel like meeting you anymore'?
And is there anything whatsoever wrong with this?
Maybe less people would make up implausible excuses if they thought they wouldn’t be bitched about for being truthful?"
Would be much easier for sure.
And then if you really did have car trouble or an ailing relative you wouldn't feel like it was an excuse then. |
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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago
Northampton Somewhere |
"Has anyone ever been honest and just said, 'I’ve changed my mind; I don’t feel like meeting you anymore'?
And is there anything whatsoever wrong with this?
Maybe less people would make up implausible excuses if they thought they wouldn’t be bitched about for being truthful?"
I have!! Then I was called a timewaster and a thinly veiled snidey thread was started which told me everything I needed to know anyway. Wouldn't stop me from doing it again either!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I know, right?
You know the scenario: Things are looking great with an imminent meet, then unsavoury things start cropping up: a hitherto unseen photo showing dirty fingernails or a swastika tattoo, an inadvertently disclosed fondness for death metal, a just-visible Last of The Summer Wine Box Set....you name it, there are things that make us less comfortable with meeting people.
The right to change one's mind is sacrosanct. It doesn’t make one a time waster, a fake, or an arse. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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After a meet one night I heard the phone ping. I thought it was going to be the customary “thank you for a lovely evening” text message from the woman I’d just had sex with.... nope it was a “sorry I couldn’t come to meet you tonight as my dog went into labour” message from her!!! Ooops not only did she have a plan b but she fucked up the dear John message she planned to send to him as she sent it to me!! I never did find out if she sent my message to him... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I know, right?
You know the scenario: Things are looking great with an imminent meet, then unsavoury things start cropping up: a hitherto unseen photo showing dirty fingernails or a swastika tattoo, an inadvertently disclosed fondness for death metal, a just-visible Last of The Summer Wine Box Set....you name it, there are things that make us less comfortable with meeting people.
The right to change one's mind is sacrosanct. It doesn’t make one a time waster, a fake, or an arse."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Many moons ago I was kinda planning to meet someone who strangely had his car impounded the day before. No idea if it was the truth or not. I couldn't be bothered to find out. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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'I got lost'... Twice! He got blocked after the second time. Didn't even let me know until the day after. While I spent the night, waiting for him, like a right tool. |
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"Having just received the most implausible reason for not showing up for a meet it occurred to me to wonder what is the most implausible reasons other members have received?
OP what was the reason you were given?
A family member had unexpectedly arrived from the USA lol"
I had relative travel 300 miles arrive on my doorstep wanting to stay for a week, total surprise, so yes it’s plausible. It’s called real life OP. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Got to within a mile of meet, having travelled 20 miles, and 16 yr old daughter rang up to say she felt I'll so we went home...." we sat in a bloody pub garden for an hour as they didn't contact us until the next day.! |
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By *adyJayneWoman
over a year ago
Burnleyish (She/They) |
"
And yes I have had family turn up who live in America, they have loads of friends and family across the world and work internationally so don't always tell us when they are coming.
What would they do if you weren't in? "
Probably visit my parents. My siblings and my grandparents. Some of which may or may not have known that they were coming. My family are not known for communicating amongst each other, nothing malicious we just constantly assume other people already know things. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"One loser said his nephew had been taken into hospital and he was looking after his sister's other children. Now this could have been true so I gave him the benefit of the doubt and a month or so later tried again, however he must have forgotten he'd already used the hospital excuse because he used it again, this time his son.
I'd never wish hospital on anyone, let alone use my family as an excuse in such a way, disgusting to be honest."
I have never used this as an excuse, but my (now fixed!) son had an undiagnosed heart condition for years, which made him collapse for no apparent reason. He could be well and tearing the place up one minute and unconscious the next. So it can happen...(he had SVT). |
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"One loser said his nephew had been taken into hospital and he was looking after his sister's other children. Now this could have been true so I gave him the benefit of the doubt and a month or so later tried again, however he must have forgotten he'd already used the hospital excuse because he used it again, this time his son.
I'd never wish hospital on anyone, let alone use my family as an excuse in such a way, disgusting to be honest.
I have never used this as an excuse, but my (now fixed!) son had an undiagnosed heart condition for years, which made him collapse for no apparent reason. He could be well and tearing the place up one minute and unconscious the next. So it can happen...(he had SVT). "
Gosh how worrying |
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"IBS sorry can't make it "
I had a massive flare-up on V Day, would have cancelled a casual meet- cramps and bloating are no fun! But wanted to see my FWB, just curled up having a cuddle, bless him |
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"I broke my phone
I broke my leg/hand
My car won't start (But managed to get verified by someone else that night)
I'm worried my cock is too small!!
I got arrested.
I had a car accident.
My car broke down.
All better than not just turning up
"
I did actually get knocked of my motorbike on way to a meet. Even sent photos of my leathers and damaged bike but still got a round of abuse |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Has anyone ever been honest and just said, 'I’ve changed my mind; I don’t feel like meeting you anymore'?
And is there anything whatsoever wrong with this?
Maybe less people would make up implausible excuses if they thought they wouldn’t be bitched about for being truthful?"
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I know, right?
You know the scenario: Things are looking great with an imminent meet, then unsavoury things start cropping up: a hitherto unseen photo showing dirty fingernails or a swastika tattoo, an inadvertently disclosed fondness for death metal, a just-visible Last of The Summer Wine Box Set....you name it, there are things that make us less comfortable with meeting people.
The right to change one's mind is sacrosanct. It doesn’t make one a time waster, a fake, or an arse."
|
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By *olarfoxMan
over a year ago
North Cambs |
"Broke the zipper on my trousers can't get them off.
I'm pregnant.
Sorry lost my signal.
I think you are married.
The car won't start.
Gotta do the washing.
I've been arrested. "
...re the last one...I actually was arrested once... managed to use one of my phone calls from the police custody suite to forewarn the couple I was due to meet... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"One loser said his nephew had been taken into hospital and he was looking after his sister's other children. Now this could have been true so I gave him the benefit of the doubt and a month or so later tried again, however he must have forgotten he'd already used the hospital excuse because he used it again, this time his son.
I'd never wish hospital on anyone, let alone use my family as an excuse in such a way, disgusting to be honest.
I have never used this as an excuse, but my (now fixed!) son had an undiagnosed heart condition for years, which made him collapse for no apparent reason. He could be well and tearing the place up one minute and unconscious the next. So it can happen...(he had SVT).
Gosh how worrying "
Yes, it was, he would regain consciousness, throw up and pass out again. He still does that now, but I think alcohol is involved! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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from a guy I sometimes met. he said his wife had found out about him playing away so it could be/was genuine. I moved house, maybe 18months or so later, arrange a meet. This guy I'm chatting to says he knows the area and when I open the door to him, IT'S HIM lol. So much for his wife finding out |
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Guy turns up when it was meant to be a couple "she's not feeling great but will come next time"
Can't meet because my ex lives on your road.
I'm sat in A&E.
Desperate to meet, day and time agreed but no address given despite asking.
"Oh I didn't hear you knocking, or the text, or the call" and didn't think to check online after 30min past agreed meeting.
Unusual but potentially harmful was, "Sorry but caught myself shaving" OUCH...
The worst is the absolute no show |
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I have two swinging friends with IBS... Believe me it's a valid reason to cancel and not often predictable.
Cars do break down but when the same person cancels three times due to their car.... It is time to move on. |
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"Having just received the most implausible reason for not showing up for a meet it occurred to me to wonder what is the most implausible reasons other members have received?
OP what was the reason you were given?
A family member had unexpectedly arrived from the USA lol"
I had a similar one, but this one was from Australia. Just turned up on the doorstep with no hint of coming. Good job the bloke was in eh? And not out having a life or anything. |
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