FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Fancy or not?
Fancy or not?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I've been reading the thread about men liking cock but not necessarily fancying the man its attached to. So it made me wonder if people meet people they fancy or just anyone that's available.
I (she) need to fancy a person before I'll meet them. I don't have a 'type'. I like the whole package, personality turns me on as much as looks. There has to be something that attracts me to the person. And that goes for men or women as I fancy them both. 
He loves cock but doesn't fancy the man it's attached to. But he does fancy women.
So my question is, do you usually need to fancy a person you meet... Or do you just meet anyone that's free? (And I don't mean that to be offensive to anyone, I'm genuinely interested. I just can't think of a better way to phrase the question!)  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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For one on one sex, yes I need to have something... Although will confess if its just oral I'm giving, the attraction can be a hard cock... For me to get touched back.. mostly yes I have to find them attractive.
However in group play I don't care... A cock is all they have to have... I think this is why I struggle with girl on girl.. I do not fancy women, and it is rare that women want impersonal sex play...
So I don't have to fancy someone so fuck or suck them.. but I do if I want to kiss them lol
Cali |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have to feel attracted to a person in order to play with them on either a physical or mental level (or both).
Sex starts and ends in the brain - stimulating someone's grey matter can be just as sexy as exciting their pink matter.
Ive never been able to understand the "Any Holes the Goal" mentality for that reason.
Perhaps this is why there can be a distinct separation between someone's defined sexuality and how they play - and why there is a fair few forum posts on being honest about sexual identity on here. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't need to fancy them to have sex, it's usually a one off meet anyway. But it helps if they are nice. In group meets I don't really look at them so doesn't matter. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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some men i just dont like the look of, i have had good fun with men i didnt fancy and the sex was good, even better if you can get someone you do fancy though. if i meet two or three men, i only need to fancy one, it doesnt matter so much about the other one. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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To be fair it depends what I am wanting the meet for.
I do however have people that I wont meet... ie.. I dont really have to fancy them.. but they have to not be those that turn me off..
Facial hair is one for that.. large men, and sometimes I just dont like the look of someone.. ( this all goes out the window for group play, unless We are picking for a gangbang)
Cali |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Normally if its one on one I need to find them attractive or have some chemistry there, otherwise I am just going through the motions.
In a 3some I dont mind too much if I dont fancy the lady, as the situation turns me on etc. However if the 3some is with someone i really like, it is soooo much better. |
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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago
South West London / Surrey |
"
So my question is, do you usually need to fancy a person you meet... Or do you just meet anyone that's free? (And I don't mean that to be offensive to anyone, I'm genuinely interested. I just can't think of a better way to phrase the question!) "
While we both need to be attracted to those we meet physically. It's also equally important that we both like the actual person too.
Not saying that we need to be best friends and know everything about them but we have to like their company, attitude and personality too.
Fussy buggars, we know  |
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Depends ...
women i have to fancy and like as a person, which annoyingly can make me shy around them. There are a few women i have met socially off here but not made a move on cos i have become tongue tied 
Men it varies, in cockslut mode in a club, i dont care, so long as they are hard, i am there to fuck, nothing else.The only thing that matters is they want to fuck me.
In more intimate meets ,couples threesome, then a spark is nesscary, but for me that is more personality than looks, s certain sexy something. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
Not saying that we need to be best friends and know everything about them but we have to like their company, attitude and personality too.
Fussy buggars, we know "
Nowt wrong with fussy!
Interesting mix. I'm still a club virgin so can't comment on that. I'm partly incredibly shy/ petrified of the idea but also really curious and turned on and want to go. Hopefully he'll be taking me to one soon.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The reason we will rarely meet off here is because Kelly doesn't get turned on that much from a pic, we have looked at a profile liked the pics then when we have met we didn't like the people. Thats why we meet in a club, party or social that way we don't feel as awkward (like we have ruined their night) by turning them down.
It's definatly more about the personality for her than the looks, where as im 50/50.
So I would say overall personality is more important than looks but only just.
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"The reason we will rarely meet off here is because Kelly doesn't get turned on that much from a pic, we have looked at a profile liked the pics then when we have met we didn't like the people. Thats why we meet in a club, party or social that way we don't feel as awkward (like we have ruined their night) by turning them down.
It's definatly more about the personality for her than the looks, where as im 50/50.
So I would say overall personality is more important than looks but only just.
"
kev feels the same, he has to like the person as person, and a pic doesnt tell him that, so much prefers to get to know people socially first. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i could find someone attractive at first sight but as for fancying them i would have to chat too them and check out there personality first.
if there just dull there will be no tention
but thats just me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Depends ...
women i have to fancy and like as a person, which annoyingly can make me shy around them. There are a few women i have met socially off here but not made a move on cos i have become tongue tied
Men it varies, in cockslut mode in a club, i dont care, so long as they are hard, i am there to fuck, nothing else.The only thing that matters is they want to fuck me.
In more intimate meets ,couples threesome, then a spark is nesscary, but for me that is more personality than looks, s certain sexy something."
Exactly this! Am a bit tongue tied around guys i fancy too tho, not just the sexy ladies..........soooooo stupid really! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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have enjoyed a spit fuck with a women i didnt like good fuck but that was it 4 true arousel attraction both physical and mental is the key thats why long term partners are the best well so i think |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There are some people that I can look at and they physically turn me off. I can see a pic or see them in a club and know I couldn't have them near me.
But as for having to be smitten with someones looks or have them fulfil a strict criteria is not the case. This sounds incredibly corny but no guy is as attractive as my gorgeous 50yr old, soft tummied, thinning haired man, so therefore fancying other men doesn't really come into it.
Yes of course I've played with beautiful looking men and that's great for my ego, but as long as both of us find the guys or the couples pleasant and they share a similar sense of humour to us and similar ideals in relation to swinging, then that's all we require |
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Too true a sense of humour is a must, my hubbie to be is 10 yrs older than me and to me the most gorgeous man in the world, but in other guys there has to be that special something, can't really describe it I don't have a type ect |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There are some people that I can look at and they physically turn me off. I can see a pic or see them in a club and know I couldn't have them near me.
But as for having to be smitten with someones looks or have them fulfil a strict criteria is not the case. This sounds incredibly corny but no guy is as attractive as my gorgeous 50yr old, soft tummied, thinning haired man, so therefore fancying other men doesn't really come into it.
Yes of course I've played with beautiful looking men and that's great for my ego, but as long as both of us find the guys or the couples pleasant and they share a similar sense of humour to us and similar ideals in relation to swinging, then that's all we require "
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To arrange a meet for 1-2-1 sex or a 3sum I need to at least like something about the way they look........ there are different levels of 'fancy' for me, so it is more that I don't find them unappealling.
However, there are some situations which are not planned or arranged...... and in some of these situations I really don't care who it is... the thrill, the buzz is the situation and what is physically happening, not who is doing it. |
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By *LBishCouple
over a year ago
near bury st edmunds |
I love the thought of a gang bang, but it's hard for me to find a group of guys where I fancy them all. I just can't seem to do it with any guy who has a hard cock, even though in my mind I would love to, in reality I just. Can't. So yes I need to fancy them and get on with them.
Most of our best meets be it with a couple or a single guy have been with people we have known a while first x most of the one off plays or spur of the Monet plays, have not been great really. Bar the odd few I have to add. X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To arrange a meet for 1-2-1 sex or a 3sum I need to at least like something about the way they look........ there are different levels of 'fancy' for me, so it is more that I don't find them unappealling.
However, there are some situations which are not planned or arranged...... and in some of these situations I really don't care who it is... the thrill, the buzz is the situation and what is physically happening, not who is doing it."
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For one on one meets I have to find them physically attractive and feel that spark.
sometimes in group situations in clubs I'm so busy enjoying sensations that when I do look I can be very surprised by who's causing them! But I wouldn't join in with s group unless someone appealed to me in the first place. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I love the thought of a gang bang, but it's hard for me to find a group of guys where I fancy them all. I just can't seem to do it with any guy who has a hard cock, even though in my mind I would love to, in reality I just. Can't. So yes I need to fancy them and get on with them.
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Here's a thought for couples - if you have to fancy a sexual partner physically and mentally before playing with them - and please don't take this the wrong way but doesn't that mess with your feelings toward your partner ?
Sometimes we see folk who want to get to know playmates first - wine dine night out etc........ Then if all feel it works then play - that just seems more like vanilla life to us !!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Here's a thought for couples - if you have to fancy a sexual partner physically and mentally before playing with them - and please don't take this the wrong way but doesn't that mess with your feelings toward your partner ?
Sometimes we see folk who want to get to know playmates first - wine dine night out etc........ Then if all feel it works then play - that just seems more like vanilla life to us !!!"
My Master encourages me to find one person that I can be emotional with too.. As yet not really found someone that it worked with.. but it doesnt affect anything between Master and myself except to intensify.
for a regular playmate I will see them more than I will see my Master he is away... but it doesnt take away from what we have.. just adds to it.
Oh but I tend to meet for a drink in a cafe first.. then try them sexually.. as doesnt matter how well I like someone if they arent what I need in the bedroom.
cali |
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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago
South West London / Surrey |
"Here's a thought for couples - if you have to fancy a sexual partner physically and mentally before playing with them - and please don't take this the wrong way but doesn't that mess with your feelings toward your partner ?
"
No not at all.....why would it?
There is a big difference between liking someone and loving them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Here's a thought for couples - if you have to fancy a sexual partner physically and mentally before playing with them - and please don't take this the wrong way but doesn't that mess with your feelings toward your partner ?
No not at all.....why would it?
ya liking someone for sex, (or I call it sexually compatible partner) need not replace someone you love. they are two entirely different platforms.
There is a big difference between liking someone and loving them. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Here's a thought for couples - if you have to fancy a sexual partner physically and mentally before playing with them - and please don't take this the wrong way but doesn't that mess with your feelings toward your partner ?
Sometimes we see folk who want to get to know playmates first - wine dine night out etc........ Then if all feel it works then play - that just seems more like vanilla life to us !!!
My Master encourages me to find one person that I can be emotional with too.. As yet not really found someone that it worked with.. but it doesnt affect anything between Master and myself except to intensify.
for a regular playmate I will see them more than I will see my Master he is away... but it doesnt take away from what we have.. just adds to it.
Oh but I tend to meet for a drink in a cafe first.. then try them sexually.. as doesnt matter how well I like someone if they arent what I need in the bedroom.
cali "
I read a lot of your posts in forums, I love them there always very good answers! And you seem great, good pics and great personality! Often thought this so thought why not post it and hopefully make you smile xx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Here's a thought for couples - if you have to fancy a sexual partner physically and mentally before playing with them - and please don't take this the wrong way but doesn't that mess with your feelings toward your partner ?
Sometimes we see folk who want to get to know playmates first - wine dine night out etc........ Then if all feel it works then play - that just seems more like vanilla life to us !!!
My Master encourages me to find one person that I can be emotional with too.. As yet not really found someone that it worked with.. but it doesnt affect anything between Master and myself except to intensify.
for a regular playmate I will see them more than I will see my Master he is away... but it doesnt take away from what we have.. just adds to it.
Oh but I tend to meet for a drink in a cafe first.. then try them sexually.. as doesnt matter how well I like someone if they arent what I need in the bedroom.
cali
I read a lot of your posts in forums, I love them there always very good answers! And you seem great, good pics and great personality! Often thought this so thought why not post it and hopefully make you smile xx"
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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago
North of The Wall - youll need your vest |
"I have to fancy someone physically and mentally (in that order) in order to play with them.....maybe that's why I've been so unsuccessful in clubs  "
Well hello sexy gal!
Have you wandered into the forums by mistake?  |
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