FabSwingers.com > Forums > Wales > What would men prefer??
What would men prefer??
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If I'm honest with regards to this.. it depends on my frame of mind.. if I have received loads of shite and rudeness then I just can't be arsed to be polite, read or ignore.. I normally log off and do Hitt circuits.. |
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When we first set up the profile, we always tried to answer back anyone who messaged, but quickly found a lot of people were not very good with rejection, thus we put a note on the profile about if not responding then take it as a polite no. Unfortunately, this doesn't deter some, who can get extremely persistent or personal. So we just ignore messages from a lot of people who have ignored reading our profile now, and those who persist we end up blocking as a last resort.
Hence why we tend to stick to people we either have known socially for a while, or meet at events. We know they are genuine (and generally will turn up), so a big tip from us, if you are single blokes get yourself to a local event and get yourself verified by people socially, it makes a huge difference on whether an initial message will also be answered too.
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As for a response to a single man. Del used to like a polite no thank you if someone isn't interested, but now understands fully why women/couples ignore, due to some people spoiling it for others. |
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Not sure there is a one size fits all approach here
If no effort has been put into the message, then why bother in return
If it's clear that someone has read the profile, sent a polite message etc, then I think it at least warrants a "thanks but no thanks" reply.
I've had those and always appreciate it, and it will get a "best wishes etc" response and that draws a nice line under everything |
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'thanks for your message but we're not going to meet' *block*.
Any kind of reply is always nice. This shows you've read the message, given it at least a second of consideration and then shutsdown any further chat.
You could go further and have a copy paste response that summarises your profile and says that their message failed to meet one or more of the points. If nothing else this should encourage them to read profiles in future  |
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Personally a no thanks is preferable as a response, certainly if the message was responding genuinely to preference and desire and sent with the intention of a connection. It is actually quite hard to craft messages to start a conversation even if you feel you meet anothers likes, as fickle as it is, they fancy you or they dont, although i find it hard to comprehend how in a single text you assess whether someone is unsuitable or not. This said given the raft of shit people seem to message i.e. come fuck me, look at my dick, etc. and the entitled behaviour of many who think a message equates to a right to response or more, I would say either option is probably acceptable behaviour and I would favour the delete and block!! |
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"If a man sends a message and it doesn’t interest me, (read my profile) I am quite specific, would men prefer it to be deleted or a reply to say “no thanks” and blocked to stop repeat messages?? "
I'd prefer just a delete. Sends quite a clear message in itself |
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"If I'm honest with regards to this.. it depends on my frame of mind.. if I have received loads of shite and rudeness then I just can't be arsed to be polite, read or ignore.. I normally log off and do Hitt circuits.. "
I really do feel for the ladies as I myself get some vile messages despite clearly stating I'm straight - can only imagine the sheer crap you have to sift through |
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I just assume that no reply means it’s a no and I leave it at that.
I don’t expect anybody to message me to let me know or to justify themselves. Of course a reply is nice but I’m very aware of how many messages couples and single women get on here and to keep up with replying to every single message would be a full time job.
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I know how bombarded single ladies and couples get with messages so I don’t mind if any message I send is either deleted, left unread, read and not replied to or read with a courteous ‘no thanks’ as a reply . Unless it is to attach a face pic which I forgot to do with my initial message I won’t send further messages without a reply as I prefer to make a note for future reference without being blocked so I can at least enjoy their photos/vids |
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"When we first set up the profile, we always tried to answer back anyone who messaged, but quickly found a lot of people were not very good with rejection, thus we put a note on the profile about if not responding then take it as a polite no. Unfortunately, this doesn't deter some, who can get extremely persistent or personal. So we just ignore messages from a lot of people who have ignored reading our profile now, and those who persist we end up blocking as a last resort.
Hence why we tend to stick to people we either have known socially for a while, or meet at events. We know they are genuine (and generally will turn up), so a big tip from us, if you are single blokes get yourself to a local event and get yourself verified by people socially, it makes a huge difference on whether an initial message will also be answered too.
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100% agree with your reply regarding message saying about no answer means no sorry. Though a no thanks would be nice. We men should appreciate and understand why couples dont reply much due to large numbers of mail. |
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"If a man sends a message and it doesn’t interest me, (read my profile) I am quite specific, would men prefer it to be deleted or a reply to say “no thanks” and blocked to stop repeat messages?? "
Well I'm out of your age range so I wouldn't message on that basis alone. However If I did then a simple thanks but not for reply is sufficient and a block would be more plausible. But to straight block I think is harsh especially if the message had context. |
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The guys who are saying they like to have X Y Z so they know where they stand....why would you consider anything other than a reply as potential interest? If I messaged anyone on here, I wouldn't give it a second thought unless they replied, for those of you saying you would prefer a reply so to not message them again, it will show if you have previously messaged etc when you view their profile . |
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"The guys who are saying they like to have X Y Z so they know where they stand....why would you consider anything other than a reply as potential interest? If I messaged anyone on here, I wouldn't give it a second thought unless they replied, for those of you saying you would prefer a reply so to not message them again, it will show if you have previously messaged etc when you view their profile . "
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I'm still not quite clear on what you're saying here or the point you're making (probably my shortcoming).
I mentioned higher up that, for me personally, I don't expect a reply of regret (i.e. a "no thank you" or something similar) and that my message being deleted is sufficient enough. It's all academic really**: I rarely send a first message and if I do I immediately delete it from my Sent Folder. I don't need to know about its fate.
**Most of my engagements, socials, dates etc have been on the back of receiving an introductory message from women. |
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Personally I’d prefer a thanks but no thanks reply but completely understand why most don’t respond due to volumes of messages I guess. I think as a newbie I’m just trying to find where I’m going wrong but again completely understand it’s not up to the people I’m messaging to educate me  |
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Just a "No thank you" does it for me!
Deleting the message is more abrupt, but I understand if you've got hundreds of men messaging you that it's much quicker.
Blocking does hurt sometimes, even though you shouldn't take it personally. Always hits harder if a block happens after sharing a face pic 🥺 |
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"Just a "No thank you" does it for me!
Deleting the message is more abrupt, but I understand if you've got hundreds of men messaging you that it's much quicker.
Blocking does hurt sometimes, even though you shouldn't take it personally. Always hits harder if a block happens after sharing a face pic 🥺"
Yeah I've had that a few times must be my ugly mug ha |
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