Morons Need Not Apply

Couple in Holmdel, New Jersey, USA

Joined: over a year ago
Last on: over a year ago

Clean and classy people who can hold a conversation as well as having a sense of humor and desire to have good friends with steamy erotic benefits. WE REALLY WANT FRIENDS first, not just bed buddies. We throughly enjoy intelligent conversation, just as much as erotic fun. A stimulated mind can stimulate a body. We only seek those special COMPATIBLE few, that can enjoy those qualities. Getting to know your friends is just as much fun as playing with them. What we do offer is an awesome fun time with great conversation, laughs, and erotic pleasure. IT IS ALL ABOUT HAVING FUN, not a competition. FWB is the key.

We seek compatible couples, but also open to possible single ladies or men. Soft but possibly Full swap with the right people. We are strictly SAME ROOM.

We have made some great friends here, enjoyed our times with them, but sadly had to weed through the time wasters to find them. So this list will save alot of time up front.

We are definitely NOT seeking

Bed Notching Certification Hounds, Party Animals or the occasional thin-skinned sensitive wimps (easily offended by everything types) OR mental cases.

To better clarify Preferences (As this was needed to be said, ugh):

- Must jump into every couples bed loaded to the hilt with certs.

- Feel you MUST drink, bong-it, puke and pass out to enjoy lifestyle. We're NOT 420 friendly, keep the doobage for yourself with pleasure.

- Are easily offended by HUMOR OR a different opinion than YOURS, Seek Mental Help.

- Afflicted with brain damage, or in some cases, dain bramage.

ALSO:

- So hung up on yourselves that everyone else is below you, there is ALWAYS SOMEONE BETTER.

- No Biker/Gangster/Thugs Please, SHE is not into them. (Christian Gray/James Bond more of her type)

(Latin: quae nullo hominum, desine quaeso ut persuaderent mutare volenti non fit. Etiam loquimur Romana lingua latina et spanish sed nolo ad)

- No BBW, HE is not into them.

- HWP with limits. (If your car shocks sink when you sit in it, you're NOT for us.)

- Cannot speak/read English.

- Local only please, due to our limited free schedule. No Out-of-State.

- If any of the above apply, we DO NOT want to hear from you.

No means No, Nein, Nicht, Nyet, BU, Nope.

Picky because we want QUALITY and compatible matches vs. Quantity.

Why you ask? Because we are here seeking MUTUAL fun, NOT ONLY YOUR FUN.

MADE THE CUT? Continue Reading:

We value our privacy and discreetly only share with a select few.

Description :

We are VERY, VERY Discreet, Both young looking and highly intelligent. She is an extremely attractive natural jaw dropper and fashionably stylish, he is also boyishly attractive and in-shape. Both professionals and cannot host (We have young children).

Married 17 years with children and very happy together. We are seeking to spice up our fun with more, with the right people. We are not newbies in the lifestyle. Open to new experiences and seeking compatible people.

She is a very tall Asian woman with a rocking body, a sense of style and flair and eager to catch up on what she has missed out on. Shy at first but a tigress in disguise. Eager to fulfill her fantasies comfy with the ladies and loves being watched.

He is tall, white, Euro Crunch descent, babyface, in shape and well endowed who has been in and out of lifestyle since the early 90's. Twisted sense of humor (thin-skinned be VERY warned) and wits. Has been there, done that, in the lifestyle and enjoying watching the wife evolve into it.

We expect people to take the time to look their best, we do not seek Ken and Barbie, but we do not want Elmer J. Fudd and Ethel Merman either.

We are not Hairaphobics like alot are lately, but we expect you to be trim and neat and have that shower fresh feeling. No one likes Fumunda cheese, if you do, you have issues and should seek help.

We are NOT about drama, but seeking fun and friendship. Not one-night stands. We seek spicers, not replacers.

We see this as being an enhancing experience beyond what toys and places could achieve. He enjoys seeing her discover all new pleasures and experiences.

Our fantasies and/or real experiences:

We tend to prefer small party's where we can meet more people and have a good time with laughs, not just play Bed Olympics. Sometimes we play at party's, sometimes we just go to watch and socialize. Catch us if you can )).

We definitely like to watch and play some, though ONLY with the right people, do we ever go further. We are quite picky and seek HWP people who take care in their looks and are hygenic people. D/D free of course. Again, we seek Quality NOT Quantity.

We both prefer slow and gentle easy times versus Rock-em Sock-em Robots.

She can always use a Sybian for a hydraullic pounding. So young, male, jack-hammers, go to bottom of her choices. We both enjoy soft and sensual more. She is not a very big squirter, but can if done right.

SAFE SEX ONLY, condoms only beyond oral.

We don't want to raise YOUR kids nor catch the things you witheld telling us about (Keep that baggage for yourself, with pleasure).

What else we'd like to say, do, see, hear about and/or learn:

We are not party hardy animals anymore. Though we do like to go out occasionally. If given a choice between candle light, wine and soft music vs. Saturday Night Fever Disco, We'll take the first choice.

What we do offer is an awesome fun time with great conversation, laughs, jokes and erotic pleasure. IT IS ALL ABOUT HAVING FUN, not a competition. FWB is the key.

We are looking for real people. We are serious, and ask that you be too. We'd prefer to exchange numbers, and go from there. We have kids which REQUIRES ADVANCED PLANNING.

No one likes a bad experience, getting to know your new friends, is JUST AS MUCH FUN as playing with them and the rewards even greater if all agree and have fun.

Please be patient. WE ALWAYS REPLY, unless single male. But if we can't, it's not that we are ignoring you, sometimes we are AFK, away on business, or caught up in life's other issues. Please do not take it personal, we read emails almost daily if possible and try to reply accordingly and promptly.

***WARNING: Any institutions or individuals using this site or any of its associated sites for studies or projects - You DO NOT have permission to use any of my profile or pictures in any form or forum both current and future. Got It? GOOD!

55 years old, Straight

6'1" 185cm
Average
Non smoker
Social drinker
No tattoos
No piercings

54 years old, Bisexual

5'10" 178cm
Slim
Non smoker
Social drinker
No tattoos
No piercings

Looking For

Couples (MF) Women
Aged from 30 to 50
Will meet smokers

Meeting

Cannot accommodate
Can travel

Interests

Threesomes, Same Room Swapping, Safe Sex, Rimming, Oral, Group Sex, Gangbangs, DP, Anal, Adult Parties

Verified Genuine Profile