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Single Lady at a Club
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So, I have been to Chams ‘alone’ as a single female a few times. But always knowing that there are couples who are there that I know. So if I just want to sit and chill I have someone to chat with. I sometimes find the bit where you are just sat in the bar area drinking a drink by yourself a little awkward. Let’s face it, in these situations most people have a swipe through their phone to look less ‘I am sat here alone’ - but of course that is not going to happen. I have been really looking forward to my visit this Friday and still want to go, especially as I am hoping to ‘push my current rules and boundaries.’
How do other singles navigate around this? I really really want to be at Chams on Friday evening. I am so gutted the single lady I was going with can no longer make it!  |
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As a single guy, this happens a lot!
I’ve always found bar/host staff are friendly though and will spot someone looking to be a bit busier. There’s always good old fashioned people watching too, others have their guard down and it’s interesting seeing life swill round you.
Also; don’t think you’ll have my problem of attracting attention! |
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By *anky_PankyWoman
over a year ago
Filthy Fuckeryville |
I have been to a club alone many many times but I do remember the nervousness I felt on a fair few of those occasions to start with....
However I was always fine, never short of anyone to talk to and generally wondered what the fuss was about afterwards!!
Between staff and other customers you'll be fine op, of that I'm sure. I'd say pull on your big girl knickers and get gone there, but that may not be your best pulling gear there 
Have a cracking night xx |
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"As a single guy, this happens a lot!
I’ve always found bar/host staff are friendly though and will spot someone looking to be a bit busier. There’s always good old fashioned people watching too, others have their guard down and it’s interesting seeing life swill round you.
Also; don’t think you’ll have my problem of attracting attention!"
Thank you so much. Do you know what, people think that single females must have a lot of attention in clubs - and to be honest I am not sure that is really the case  Maybe it’s just me?!
I am definitely going to go - I have been too excited not to show up now! |
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"I have been to a club alone many many times but I do remember the nervousness I felt on a fair few of those occasions to start with....
However I was always fine, never short of anyone to talk to and generally wondered what the fuss was about afterwards!!
Between staff and other customers you'll be fine op, of that I'm sure. I'd say pull on your big girl knickers and get gone there, but that may not be your best pulling gear there
Have a cracking night xx"
Thank you so much, I will definitely putting ‘my pretty pants on’ and getting involved  |
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By *Craig-Man
over a year ago
Bolton |
There's a few of us going to Chams on Friday and a number of us will be single.
I always feels awkward being by yourself, but i have learnt just to say hi and smile and hope they'll be nice back !
That said, I'll probably be just sat at the bar ! |
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"There's a few of us going to Chams on Friday and a number of us will be single.
I always feels awkward being by yourself, but i have learnt just to say hi and smile and hope they'll be nice back !
That said, I'll probably be just sat at the bar !"
Well if you see an awkward lonely blonde female sat at the bar - please do say hello!  |
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"A couple of drinks and I will talk to anyone but seriously I’m in that position too and have had some of the best nights "
Thank you so much, you have given me a little confidence boost I am generally a very chatty person so I am hoping I will be ok. If not it seems there will be others there in this thread that might take pity on me lol |
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"So, I have been to Chams ‘alone’ as a single female a few times. But always knowing that there are couples who are there that I know. So if I just want to sit and chill I have someone to chat with. I sometimes find the bit where you are just sat in the bar area drinking a drink by yourself a little awkward. Let’s face it, in these situations most people have a swipe through their phone to look less ‘I am sat here alone’ - but of course that is not going to happen. I have been really looking forward to my visit this Friday and still want to go, especially as I am hoping to ‘push my current rules and boundaries.’
How do other singles navigate around this? I really really want to be at Chams on Friday evening. I am so gutted the single lady I was going with can no longer make it! "
I go to certain clubs on a Friday night (Rios/Ab Fabs) which are full of single men, and as a single woman, it’s what I like. I’m not interested in couples at all. I do have other single female friends of mine who also come out. It’s far more fun than going as a couple. However, my friends and I are into gang bangs rather than one to ones. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm going on my own this Friday!
I'm excited and nervous.
My plan is to suss out the venue first, then have a drink at the bar so I can observe.
Hope you have a lovely time! Remember to smile, as that's the best thing you could wear! x
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"Just be yourself. I say this as someone who has been lucky enough to meet you numerous times there and it is always a pleasure"
Thank you so much, you and A are one of the reasons I love going to Chams. It attracts the best kind of people |
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"I'm going on my own this Friday!
I'm excited and nervous.
My plan is to suss out the venue first, then have a drink at the bar so I can observe.
Hope you have a lovely time! Remember to smile, as that's the best thing you could wear! x
"
How amazing! Quite a few single ladies going! I will be sure to say hi if I see you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm going on my own this Friday!
I'm excited and nervous.
My plan is to suss out the venue first, then have a drink at the bar so I can observe.
Hope you have a lovely time! Remember to smile, as that's the best thing you could wear! x
How amazing! Quite a few single ladies going! I will be sure to say hi if I see you "
I'm sadly going to a club in London! Would have been nice to have met you though x |
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By *iraelWoman
over a year ago
Wolverhampton |
"So, I have been to Chams ‘alone’ as a single female a few times. But always knowing that there are couples who are there that I know. So if I just want to sit and chill I have someone to chat with. I sometimes find the bit where you are just sat in the bar area drinking a drink by yourself a little awkward. Let’s face it, in these situations most people have a swipe through their phone to look less ‘I am sat here alone’ - but of course that is not going to happen. I have been really looking forward to my visit this Friday and still want to go, especially as I am hoping to ‘push my current rules and boundaries.’
How do other singles navigate around this? I really really want to be at Chams on Friday evening. I am so gutted the single lady I was going with can no longer make it! "
I go as a single female, but have never yet managed an evening when someone I already know isn’t about to say hello to. There’s been a couple of times I’ve mostly lurked at the bar, luckily the bar staff are so chatty it hasn’t felt too awkward.
Unfortunately because I’m not interested in playing with women I tend not to end up saying hello to many of the single women there because almost every time it comes across as a chat up when I do actually really mean that I like their shoes/outfit!  |
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By *intyGWoman
over a year ago
Bedford |
I attend most clubs as a single lady; it depends on what mood I’m in but I find that if you’re warm people will naturally gravitate towards you and you are set to make many wonderful friends
As a straight woman my personal preference is the greedy girls events more than couples nights; people do tend to assume you’re bi and can get a little thirsty. But as another poster said - I never feel alone as it’s a fairly small scene where I live so there’s usually someone I’ve met before I can chat to first x
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I like Chams and have no probs being there alone. But I recently went to Xtasia for the first time and had planned to just watch,not play ....I was enjoying myself exploring the venue, watching people play, watching women dance, watching people interact with each other, and speaking to people I wanted to speak to (not many, but all that I wanted!). However TWO different men came up to me and specifically said they came to speak to me because I looked "awkward"  I was shocked at the time and brushed it off, but now I'm pissed off about it- how fucking rude - I wasn't feeling awkward, I was quite happily doing my own thing, until they made me feel uncomfortable and out of place. Hopefully it was just unlucky, but it put me off the place a bit. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m contemplating a solo visit to Chams this Friday but not sure if I have got the bottle to go alone.
Are there more single guys on a Friday as I’m not really interested in couples. |
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By *ittleMissCaliWoman
over a year ago
trouble most likely, or creating it :) |
"So, I have been to Chams ‘alone’ as a single female a few times. But always knowing that there are couples who are there that I know. So if I just want to sit and chill I have someone to chat with. I sometimes find the bit where you are just sat in the bar area drinking a drink by yourself a little awkward. Let’s face it, in these situations most people have a swipe through their phone to look less ‘I am sat here alone’ - but of course that is not going to happen. I have been really looking forward to my visit this Friday and still want to go, especially as I am hoping to ‘push my current rules and boundaries.’
How do other singles navigate around this? I really really want to be at Chams on Friday evening. I am so gutted the single lady I was going with can no longer make it! "
I'm going.... come along. It's been ages since I've seen you |
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By *jonesMan
over a year ago
Totnes |
"I’m contemplating a solo visit to Chams this Friday but not sure if I have got the bottle to go alone.
Are there more single guys on a Friday as I’m not really interested in couples."
Yes ..and it's a friendly pleasant bunch.. |
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By *mids21Man
over a year ago
Birmingham |
I have been to chams a few times as a couple and now as a single male.
I was absolutely bricking it the first time I went alone but Mark and the bar staff put me right at ease and made me feel very comfortable!
I may be going Friday so keep a look out x
Have a fun night x
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By *iraelWoman
over a year ago
Wolverhampton |
"I like Chams and have no probs being there alone. But I recently went to Xtasia for the first time and had planned to just watch,not play ....I was enjoying myself exploring the venue, watching people play, watching women dance, watching people interact with each other, and speaking to people I wanted to speak to (not many, but all that I wanted!). However TWO different men came up to me and specifically said they came to speak to me because I looked "awkward" I was shocked at the time and brushed it off, but now I'm pissed off about it- how fucking rude - I wasn't feeling awkward, I was quite happily doing my own thing, until they made me feel uncomfortable and out of place. Hopefully it was just unlucky, but it put me off the place a bit. "
Ugh, the "awkward" thing, I don't see how that's supposed to be a good icebreaker!
Sorry this happened when you were happily chilling, I hope they turn out to be the exception if you go again. |
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By *iraelWoman
over a year ago
Wolverhampton |
"
I attend most clubs as a single lady; it depends on what mood I’m in but I find that if you’re warm people will naturally gravitate towards you and you are set to make many wonderful friends
As a straight woman my personal preference is the greedy girls events more than couples nights; people do tend to assume you’re bi and can get a little thirsty. But as another poster said - I never feel alone as it’s a fairly small scene where I live so there’s usually someone I’ve met before I can chat to first x
"
This is exactly why I go on my own on a Friday, and even the nights my partner can come out we much prefer Fridays. The general woman=bi thing is a little exhausting. |
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