FabSwingers.com > Forums > Introductions > Tiered off writing well thought out messages...
Tiered off writing well thought out messages...
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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It's actually quite degrading for a man who actually takes the time to write a well thought message to a woman here on fab...you read her profile and demonstrate that by the content off your message...and instead of responding saying sorry your not my type or what I'm looking for just deletes it...and women on here wonder why most guys just say hi...this is not a site for single men...  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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And how much better are you going to feel if they respond,"sorry you're not my type or what I'm looking for"?
They still aren't going to meet.
Site rules says no reply means not interested.if that's not good enough for you then perhaps this is not the site for you. |
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By *ost SockMan
over a year ago
West Wales and Cardiff |
She'll have received plenty of other well-thought out messages that demonstrate they've read the profile and another big pile of others that don't.
Would you copy and paste "sorry, no thanks" into 20/30 or more messages by way of reply every day? I think we'd all grow pretty tired of doing that, especially when there's a follow up message going "why?" or much worse.
Lots of women would need a secretary to keep up properly.
The profile could be better too tbh.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I'd actually feel a lot better with a woman responding and just having that courtesy, I understand what your saying about site rules...but in the same instance it's like a double edged blade.
To the question of what's a thirsty nigga, well just a man that is desperate for a fuck that he looses all respect for himself to get it like the guy who said "just send a dick pic and ask too fuck" that's a thirsty nigga...why do I need to change my profile content? And what would you recommend I change it too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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In my opinion it is a wasted effort putting so much into a first message. A simple message is all that's required. Nothing long and rambling. Most will make a decision based on whether they like your profile/pictures....if you start off jumping through hoops that's what the recipient will expect of you. That's my advice anyway. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Ok let's do an experiment because a lot of women who have said something have said if they read my profile they would delete the message...so may I ask personally what is wrong and what I could do to improve it... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'd actually feel a lot better with a woman responding and just having that courtesy, I understand what your saying about site rules...but in the same instance it's like a double edged blade.
To the question of what's a thirsty nigga, well just a man that is desperate for a fuck that he looses all respect for himself to get it like the guy who said "just send a dick pic and ask too fuck" that's a thirsty nigga...why do I need to change my profile content? And what would you recommend I change it too."
I'm not thirsty, nor do I moan about not getting replies back.. I get sex in the real world  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ok let's do an experiment because a lot of women who have said something have said if they read my profile they would delete the message...so may I ask personally what is wrong and what I could do to improve it..."
A big one for me....no pics would mean i wouldn't even consider you. |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"Ok let's do an experiment because a lot of women who have said something have said if they read my profile they would delete the message...so may I ask personally what is wrong and what I could do to improve it..."
Use less slang maybe. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You need pictures and I'm not talking about cock pics either. Take out the words thirsty nigga it's sounds awful and not a lot of people know what it means. There isn't a lot on your txt either about yourself, what your looking for, what fantasies you wish to fulfil. Your not really selling yourself |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thing is tho the only slang I used was one word ?? and seduction i hear what your saying, but I saw a couple pictures off people that are on here on Google...like yeah I've got pictures and happy to send but all it takes is for someone to right click your pic copy image and start taking the piss, you see where I'm coming from? And further more who was moaning? At not getting replies this is a forum I thought I'd just speak about how I felt.. is there a problem with that? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thing is tho the only slang I used was one word ?? and seduction i hear what your saying, but I saw a couple pictures off people that are on here on Google...like yeah I've got pictures and happy to send but all it takes is for someone to right click your pic copy image and start taking the piss, you see where I'm coming from? And further more who was moaning? At not getting replies this is a forum I thought I'd just speak about how I felt.. is there a problem with that?"
No not at all... Just don't call me thirsty... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Reason why I used that term, was because majority of the women I message are mixed race so, like, they would more than likely understand what I meant but ive noted it and removed it...ok so wants, fantasies and pretty much selling myself?? Okay can you give me an example...I'm going to end up getting a note pad and a pen soon ?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thing is tho the only slang I used was one word ?? and seduction i hear what your saying, but I saw a couple pictures off people that are on here on Google...like yeah I've got pictures and happy to send but all it takes is for someone to right click your pic copy image and start taking the piss, you see where I'm coming from? And further more who was moaning? At not getting replies this is a forum I thought I'd just speak about how I felt.. is there a problem with that?"
That's why i have pics where i don't care what happens to them. But it's your profile and your choice. I'm just saying what would put me off....and i haven't even read your profile because there were no pictures. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ok let's do an experiment because a lot of women who have said something have said if they read my profile they would delete the message...so may I ask personally what is wrong and what I could do to improve it..."
No pics and your thirsty nigga comment |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Thing is tho the only slang I used was one word ?? and seduction i hear what your saying, but I saw a couple pictures off people that are on here on Google...like yeah I've got pictures and happy to send but all it takes is for someone to right click your pic copy image and start taking the piss, you see where I'm coming from? And further more who was moaning? At not getting replies this is a forum I thought I'd just speak about how I felt.. is there a problem with that?
That's why i have pics where i don't care what happens to them. But it's your profile and your choice. I'm just saying what would put me off....and i haven't even read your profile because there were no pictures."
Yeah I appreciate where you are coming from, possibly need to find a few pictures where I feel the same I e don't give a fuck.
Can I just say as well thank you too every one, for this pleasant conversation |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Everyone has different ways of dealing with their inbox. If it's a polite message but I'm not interested I reply saying so in a nice, inoffensive manner. I often get shitty replies back. Is it any wonder the delete button is more tempting? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Everyone has different ways of dealing with their inbox. If it's a polite massage but I'm not interested I reply saying so in a nice, inoffensive manner. I often get shitty replies back. Is it any wonder the delete button is more tempting?"
I can appreciate where your coming from. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Reason why I used that term, was because majority of the women I message are mixed race so, like, they would more than likely understand what I meant but ive noted it and removed it...ok so wants, fantasies and pretty much selling myself?? Okay can you give me an example...I'm going to end up getting a note pad and a pen soon ??"
Can't really give you examples as we want different things but you can say what ever, your selling your personality as well as your body
I really wanna try x,y and z
My biggest fantasy is (insert what ever here)
I really enjoy doing (insert what ever here)
I rearly love when a girl does (insert whatever here)
My turn ons are ........
My turn offs are .... ...
My fave part of a woman is .....
My favourite thing about my self is
My sense of humour is ( most of us like a sense of humour)
As a person I am (charming, fun, flirty, witty ect ect)
You get the general idea
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Reason why I used that term, was because majority of the women I message are mixed race so, like, they would more than likely understand what I meant but ive noted it and removed it...ok so wants, fantasies and pretty much selling myself?? Okay can you give me an example...I'm going to end up getting a note pad and a pen soon ??
Can't really give you examples as we want different things but you can say what ever, your selling your personality as well as your body
I really wanna try x,y and z
My biggest fantasy is (insert what ever here)
I really enjoy doing (insert what ever here)
I rearly love when a girl does (insert whatever here)
My turn ons are ........
My turn offs are .... ...
My fave part of a woman is .....
My favourite thing about my self is
My sense of humour is ( most of us like a sense of humour)
As a person I am (charming, fun, flirty, witty ect ect)
You get the general idea
"
While you are on the subject...would you mind giving my profile a review as well please??  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's actually quite degrading for a man who actually takes the time to write a well thought message to a woman here on fab...you read her profile and demonstrate that by the content off your message...and instead of responding saying sorry your not my type or what I'm looking for just deletes it...and women on here wonder why most guys just say hi...this is not a site for single men... "
And I feel degraded by the number of people with crap profiles who expect replies when they have clearly got nothing to offer me.
Can I join the "I feel degraded" club?
On the other hand, I could just ignore them and get on with those that do interest me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's actually quite degrading for a man who actually takes the time to write a well thought message to a woman here on fab...you read her profile and demonstrate that by the content off your message...and instead of responding saying sorry your not my type or what I'm looking for just deletes it...and women on here wonder why most guys just say hi...this is not a site for single men... "
I have found that too. Most women and couples get 100's of messages a day so although it's annoying you can't really blame them. That said you're better off getting on here as a couple!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's actually quite degrading for a man who actually takes the time to write a well thought message to a woman here on fab...you read her profile and demonstrate that by the content off your message...and instead of responding saying sorry your not my type or what I'm looking for just deletes it...and women on here wonder why most guys just say hi...this is not a site for single men... "
This is not a site for single guys looking for sex. This is a swinging site and there is a difference but let's not go in to that right now.
Your profile txt seems to be shaped by your experiences on here in a negative way. If you walked up to a girl in a bar and she ignored you what would you do? Have a go at her because you've said hello she should speak to you?!
We all reserve the right to talk to who we want to and to 'ignore' the ones we don't.
No photos on your profile is a mistake too as your profile is your shop window. I have private photos that my friends list can see and I can send out to anyone I want to meet. I think you need to read through other people's profiles and see what makes them 'successful'. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Speaking to a woman in a club is completely different then speaking to someone on a website in the sense that if I walk up woman in a club majority of the time that woman has given me some sort of inclination That she would like me to approach her and most commonly I've not been in a situation in a long time where a woman has ignored, but if it where to happen yeah I'd shrug it off...But you can't necessarily say that this site isn't for single people considering there are plenty of single people there on here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Speaking to a woman in a club is completely different then speaking to someone on a website in the sense that if I walk up woman in a club majority of the time that woman has given me some sort of inclination That she would like me to approach her and most commonly I've not been in a situation in a long time where a woman has ignored, but if it where to happen yeah I'd shrug it off...But you can't necessarily say that this site isn't for single people considering there are plenty of single people there on here"
When you are speaking to a woman in a club, you both have a sense of physicality and mentality. This is no different. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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but having heard what everyone had to say I feel that the best thing for me to do it's probably to shape my profile around my personality a bit more probably add a few more pictures I wasn't Slate in the women on here by the way And I think the use of the word degrading yeah I'm more than likely should have used the word demoralizing so my apologies |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Speaking to a woman in a club is completely different then speaking to someone on a website in the sense that if I walk up woman in a club majority of the time that woman has given me some sort of inclination That she would like me to approach her and most commonly I've not been in a situation in a long time where a woman has ignored, but if it where to happen yeah I'd shrug it off...But you can't necessarily say that this site isn't for single people considering there are plenty of single people there on here
When you are speaking to a woman in a club, you both have a sense of physicality and mentality. This is no different."
I would agree with that but in the same instance when you're face to face with someone they are able to get a better understanding of your personality they're able to hear your voice terrible to hear you charm they're able to see you alot clearer than in a photo picture or and a description you've written aS a biography. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Speaking to a woman in a club is completely different then speaking to someone on a website in the sense that if I walk up woman in a club majority of the time that woman has given me some sort of inclination That she would like me to approach her and most commonly I've not been in a situation in a long time where a woman has ignored, but if it where to happen yeah I'd shrug it off...But you can't necessarily say that this site isn't for single people considering there are plenty of single people there on here
When you are speaking to a woman in a club, you both have a sense of physicality and mentality. This is no different.
I would agree with that but in the same instance when you're face to face with someone they are able to get a better understanding of your personality they're able to hear your voice terrible to hear you charm they're able to see you alot clearer than in a photo picture or and a description you've written aS a biography."
If you prefer a club environment, go for it.
If you want to catch attention here, sieve through the advice and do whatever you consider to be appropriate. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Speaking to a woman in a club is completely different then speaking to someone on a website in the sense that if I walk up woman in a club majority of the time that woman has given me some sort of inclination That she would like me to approach her and most commonly I've not been in a situation in a long time where a woman has ignored, but if it where to happen yeah I'd shrug it off...But you can't necessarily say that this site isn't for single people considering there are plenty of single people there on here
When you are speaking to a woman in a club, you both have a sense of physicality and mentality. This is no different.
I would agree with that but in the same instance when you're face to face with someone they are able to get a better understanding of your personality they're able to hear your voice terrible to hear you charm they're able to see you alot clearer than in a photo picture or and a description you've written aS a biography.
If you prefer a club environment, go for it.
If you want to catch attention here, sieve through the advice and do whatever you consider to be appropriate."
I consider what you have said to be very useful and will take your advice on bard thank you for time to share your views |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's actually quite degrading for a man who actually takes the time to write a well thought message to a woman here on fab...you read her profile and demonstrate that by the content off your message...and instead of responding saying sorry your not my type or what I'm looking for just deletes it...and women on here wonder why most guys just say hi...this is not a site for single men... "
And I get tired of writing well-thought out "thanks, but no thanks" messages to guys to try and spare their egos at being knocked back again. And then having to field the messages that come back after that...in the end, I have to delete the messages and on a lot of occasions, use the "block" button, then get snidey remarks on posts that I make on the forum by guys who pestered and got the delete-block combo. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's actually quite degrading for a man who actually takes the time to write a well thought message to a woman here on fab...you read her profile and demonstrate that by the content off your message...and instead of responding saying sorry your not my type or what I'm looking for just deletes it...and women on here wonder why most guys just say hi...this is not a site for single men...
And I get tired of writing well-thought out "thanks, but no thanks" messages to guys to try and spare their egos at being knocked back again. And then having to field the messages that come back after that...in the end, I have to delete the messages and on a lot of occasions, use the "block" button, then get snidey remarks on posts that I make on the forum by guys who pestered and got the delete-block combo."
Us too. It is not a one way street.
Boring, uninformative profiles, cock pictures, unimaginative messages ... We do make contact now and again. Sometimes, we even meet. But there has to be a spark and that only comes around now and again.
See, even couples can moan ... but then again, our expectations are grounded and realistic. Hence no disappointment. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Reason why I used that term, was because majority of the women I message are mixed race so, like, they would more than likely understand what I meant but ive noted it and removed it...ok so wants, fantasies and pretty much selling myself?? Okay can you give me an example...I'm going to end up getting a note pad and a pen soon ??
Can't really give you examples as we want different things but you can say what ever, your selling your personality as well as your body
I really wanna try x,y and z
My biggest fantasy is (insert what ever here)
I really enjoy doing (insert what ever here)
I rearly love when a girl does (insert whatever here)
My turn ons are ........
My turn offs are .... ...
My fave part of a woman is .....
My favourite thing about my self is
My sense of humour is ( most of us like a sense of humour)
As a person I am (charming, fun, flirty, witty ect ect)
You get the general idea
While you are on the subject...would you mind giving my profile a review as well please?? "
Yours isn't that bad |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's actually quite degrading for a man who actually takes the time to write a well thought message to a woman here on fab...you read her profile and demonstrate that by the content off your message...and instead of responding saying sorry your not my type or what I'm looking for just deletes it...and women on here wonder why most guys just say hi...this is not a site for single men...
And I get tired of writing well-thought out "thanks, but no thanks" messages to guys to try and spare their egos at being knocked back again. And then having to field the messages that come back after that...in the end, I have to delete the messages and on a lot of occasions, use the "block" button, then get snidey remarks on posts that I make on the forum by guys who pestered and got the delete-block combo."
See I'm not one of those guys I'd likely message you back saying well thanks for your honesty happy swinging. But your starting to make me realise...I never knew men where acting like that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's actually quite degrading for a man who actually takes the time to write a well thought message to a woman here on fab...you read her profile and demonstrate that by the content off your message...and instead of responding saying sorry your not my type or what I'm looking for just deletes it...and women on here wonder why most guys just say hi...this is not a site for single men...
And I get tired of writing well-thought out "thanks, but no thanks" messages to guys to try and spare their egos at being knocked back again. And then having to field the messages that come back after that...in the end, I have to delete the messages and on a lot of occasions, use the "block" button, then get snidey remarks on posts that I make on the forum by guys who pestered and got the delete-block combo.
See I'm not one of those guys I'd likely message you back saying well thanks for your honesty happy swinging. But your starting to make me realise...I never knew men where acting like that."
You have no idea.....How about the guy I had a phone chat with and decided 25 minutes into listening about him, him and more about him, that I wasn't going to meet him. Then when he messaged me afterwards to ask me how much I like chatting to him and when were we going to meet for real and I politely declined? Then he got nasty, I got text messages night and day, dozens of them and then he threatened to post my phone number of every sex site he could as well as phone boxes, toilet walls and anywhere else he could think of so that I would have to dump that number and get a new one. Go figure, single guys have to compete against knobs like that! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's actually quite degrading for a man who actually takes the time to write a well thought message to a woman here on fab...you read her profile and demonstrate that by the content off your message...and instead of responding saying sorry your not my type or what I'm looking for just deletes it...and women on here wonder why most guys just say hi...this is not a site for single men...
And I get tired of writing well-thought out "thanks, but no thanks" messages to guys to try and spare their egos at being knocked back again. And then having to field the messages that come back after that...in the end, I have to delete the messages and on a lot of occasions, use the "block" button, then get snidey remarks on posts that I make on the forum by guys who pestered and got the delete-block combo.
See I'm not one of those guys I'd likely message you back saying well thanks for your honesty happy swinging. But your starting to make me realise...I never knew men where acting like that.
You have no idea.....How about the guy I had a phone chat with and decided 25 minutes into listening about him, him and more about him, that I wasn't going to meet him. Then when he messaged me afterwards to ask me how much I like chatting to him and when were we going to meet for real and I politely declined? Then he got nasty, I got text messages night and day, dozens of them and then he threatened to post my phone number of every sex site he could as well as phone boxes, toilet walls and anywhere else he could think of so that I would have to dump that number and get a new one. Go figure, single guys have to compete against knobs like that! "
That is so fucked up, you should have had him prosecuted, sorry to hear about your terrible experience x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's actually quite degrading for a man who actually takes the time to write a well thought message to a woman here on fab...you read her profile and demonstrate that by the content off your message...and instead of responding saying sorry your not my type or what I'm looking for just deletes it...and women on here wonder why most guys just say hi...this is not a site for single men...
And I get tired of writing well-thought out "thanks, but no thanks" messages to guys to try and spare their egos at being knocked back again. And then having to field the messages that come back after that...in the end, I have to delete the messages and on a lot of occasions, use the "block" button, then get snidey remarks on posts that I make on the forum by guys who pestered and got the delete-block combo.
See I'm not one of those guys I'd likely message you back saying well thanks for your honesty happy swinging. But your starting to make me realise...I never knew men where acting like that.
You have no idea.....How about the guy I had a phone chat with and decided 25 minutes into listening about him, him and more about him, that I wasn't going to meet him. Then when he messaged me afterwards to ask me how much I like chatting to him and when were we going to meet for real and I politely declined? Then he got nasty, I got text messages night and day, dozens of them and then he threatened to post my phone number of every sex site he could as well as phone boxes, toilet walls and anywhere else he could think of so that I would have to dump that number and get a new one. Go figure, single guys have to compete against knobs like that!
That is so fucked up, you should have had him prosecuted, sorry to hear about your terrible experience x"
Apologising for other people's behaviour does not in any way help you, OP. Just be the best that you can be. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's actually quite degrading for a man who actually takes the time to write a well thought message to a woman here on fab...you read her profile and demonstrate that by the content off your message...and instead of responding saying sorry your not my type or what I'm looking for just deletes it...and women on here wonder why most guys just say hi...this is not a site for single men...
And I get tired of writing well-thought out "thanks, but no thanks" messages to guys to try and spare their egos at being knocked back again. And then having to field the messages that come back after that...in the end, I have to delete the messages and on a lot of occasions, use the "block" button, then get snidey remarks on posts that I make on the forum by guys who pestered and got the delete-block combo.
See I'm not one of those guys I'd likely message you back saying well thanks for your honesty happy swinging. But your starting to make me realise...I never knew men where acting like that.
You have no idea.....How about the guy I had a phone chat with and decided 25 minutes into listening about him, him and more about him, that I wasn't going to meet him. Then when he messaged me afterwards to ask me how much I like chatting to him and when were we going to meet for real and I politely declined? Then he got nasty, I got text messages night and day, dozens of them and then he threatened to post my phone number of every sex site he could as well as phone boxes, toilet walls and anywhere else he could think of so that I would have to dump that number and get a new one. Go figure, single guys have to compete against knobs like that!
That is so fucked up, you should have had him prosecuted, sorry to hear about your terrible experience x"
It's ok, I learned and moved on. But you see, we all do things differently, I was just trying to show why some people just delete and occasionally block at the same time....it saves potential hassle. If you just carry on writing to people, if they write back, all well and good. If they don't, accept and move on. |
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"It's ok, I learned and moved on. But you see, we all do things differently, I was just trying to show why some people just delete and occasionally block at the same time....it saves potential hassle. If you just carry on writing to people, if they write back, all well and good. If they don't, accept and move on."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think what the OP is trying to say is that he has read more than a few profiles that expect more than a one-liner message from the off. I reckon he feels somewhat seen-off that he has to spend a long time thinking of funny, imaginative or original messages, only for them to be completely ignored and deleted.
To compare it to a club scenario, if you went up to a woman and said "Hello" and politely introduced yourself. Even if she made some bullshit excuse about needing to go speak to her friend, so long as she was polite about it, most normal people would not feel overly annoyed. Rejection in any form always sucks, but it's an occupational hazard. HOWEVER, if you politely introduced yourself and she literally ignored you, turned around and walked off without even acknowledgement, you'd get understandably annoyed. I believe this is what the OP is saying it feels like.
As advice to the OP, more profile text and some pics would help you out. Your body is listed as athletic, so prove it. Body pics will see your success rate will dramatically increase. As the old saying goes, if you've got it flaunt it! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I haven't got time to say sorry not for me to every message I get! You should take a deleted message as a no thanks and move the hell on! "
I would say maybe he doesn't have time to write War & Peace to everyone he likes the look of, so it's kind of a 2-way street there... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think what the OP is trying to say is that he has read more than a few profiles that expect more than a one-liner message from the off. I reckon he feels somewhat seen-off that he has to spend a long time thinking of funny, imaginative or original messages, only for them to be completely ignored and deleted.
To compare it to a club scenario, if you went up to a woman and said "Hello" and politely introduced yourself. Even if she made some bullshit excuse about needing to go speak to her friend, so long as she was polite about it, most normal people would not feel overly annoyed. Rejection in any form always sucks, but it's an occupational hazard. HOWEVER, if you politely introduced yourself and she literally ignored you, turned around and walked off without even acknowledgement, you'd get understandably annoyed. I believe this is what the OP is saying it feels like.
As advice to the OP, more profile text and some pics would help you out. Your body is listed as athletic, so prove it. Body pics will see your success rate will dramatically increase. As the old saying goes, if you've got it flaunt it!"
Yes all well and good, but this is FAB. Things will not change. So long as people don't read profiles and send messages to people when they don't fit their preferences, messages will be deleted and ignored. The site owners themselves recognise this, and have put it in FAQ's.No reply is no interest.
The sheer volume of messages that some ladies receive is ridiculous. That's not the sites fault, but the people who are messaging. If the sites so bad no one is forced to stay. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I haven't got time to say sorry not for me to every message I get! You should take a deleted message as a no thanks and move the hell on!
I would say maybe he doesn't have time to write War & Peace to everyone he likes the look of, so it's kind of a 2-way street there..."
No one is forcing him to send messages,yet be is somewhat demanding a response.not a 2way street I recognise. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
No one is forcing him to send messages,yet be is somewhat demanding a response.not a 2way street I recognise."
Correct, no-one is forcing him to send messages. But if you send zero messages you will definitely get no replies. I personally didn't think he was demanding a response, so much as asking a question. Such is often the problem with the written word... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Yes all well and good, but this is FAB. Things will not change. So long as people don't read profiles and send messages to people when they don't fit their preferences, messages will be deleted and ignored. The site owners themselves recognise this, and have put it in FAQ's.No reply is no interest.
The sheer volume of messages that some ladies receive is ridiculous. That's not the sites fault, but the people who are messaging. If the sites so bad no one is forced to stay."
From what the OP was saying, he DOES read their profiles.
It's fine saying no reply is no interest, so long as you don't mind a brief first message. I'm pretty sure that's what the purpose of the wink is. You wink to say you're interested. No wink back, no interest. Get a wink back, some interest, then you write out the long, well-thought out and intelligent message. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Yes all well and good, but this is FAB. Things will not change. So long as people don't read profiles and send messages to people when they don't fit their preferences, messages will be deleted and ignored. The site owners themselves recognise this, and have put it in FAQ's.No reply is no interest.
The sheer volume of messages that some ladies receive is ridiculous. That's not the sites fault, but the people who are messaging. If the sites so bad no one is forced to stay.
From what the OP was saying, he DOES read their profiles.
It's fine saying no reply is no interest, so long as you don't mind a brief first message. I'm pretty sure that's what the purpose of the wink is. You wink to say you're interested. No wink back, no interest. Get a wink back, some interest, then you write out the long, well-thought out and intelligent message. "
I wait until my winks get to 500 and then delete the lot. Never even look at them. I'm sure I'm not the only one who ignores winks. Before I discovered filters I had enough crap one word/one liner messages it really didn't matter if there was a 'well thought out message' in there. They got bulk deleted too.
Seriously nothing will change unless admin restricts the number of single men on here (and that's not going to happen).
People run their profiles to suit them. Nobody else. Others need to understand and respect that. |
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"I'd actually feel a lot better with a woman responding and just having that courtesy, I understand what your saying about site rules...but in the same instance it's like a double edged blade.
To the question of what's a thirsty nigga, well just a man that is desperate for a fuck that he looses all respect for himself to get it like the guy who said "just send a dick pic and ask too fuck" that's a thirsty nigga...why do I need to change my profile content? And what would you recommend I change it too.
I'm not thirsty, nor do I moan about not getting replies back.. I get sex in the real world "
Grounded response |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I wait until my winks get to 500 and then delete the lot. Never even look at them. I'm sure I'm not the only one who ignores winks. Before I discovered filters I had enough crap one word/one liner messages it really didn't matter if there was a 'well thought out message' in there. They got bulk deleted too.
Seriously nothing will change unless admin restricts the number of single men on here (and that's not going to happen).
People run their profiles to suit them. Nobody else. Others need to understand and respect that. "
So what we can deduce is too many single men are on here. What if they changed the site so that single men couldn't wink and could only speak when spoken to? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why do you need rejection in written form?"
Thinking about this, there is a good point here.....but....I would argue that a non response rejection is marginally worse. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'd actually feel a lot better with a woman responding and just having that courtesy, I understand what your saying about site rules...but in the same instance it's like a double edged blade.
To the question of what's a thirsty nigga, well just a man that is desperate for a fuck that he looses all respect for himself to get it like the guy who said "just send a dick pic and ask too fuck" that's a thirsty nigga...why do I need to change my profile content? And what would you recommend I change it too."
Dude, you have no pics ffs...dont even bother if u have no pics |
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By *manda63Woman
over a year ago
Southampton |
"It's actually quite degrading for a man who actually takes the time to write a well thought message to a woman here on fab...you read her profile and demonstrate that by the content off your message...and instead of responding saying sorry your not my type or what I'm looking for just deletes it...and women on here wonder why most guys just say hi...this is not a site for single men... "
You have no pictures on your profile and no written text about yourself and you have been here five weeks. I wouldn't respond to a message once I'd looked at your profile. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
No one is forcing him to send messages,yet be is somewhat demanding a response.not a 2way street I recognise.
Correct, no-one is forcing him to send messages. But if you send zero messages you will definitely get no replies. I personally didn't think he was demanding a response, so much as asking a question. Such is often the problem with the written word..."
You will get no replies....as a reply must be to an initial message. It does NOT mean you will get no messages. Women look at profiles too....if it's good enough they ay message you first. Often the best way to start a conversation etc.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
You will get no replies....as a reply must be to an initial message. It does NOT mean you will get no messages. Women look at profiles too....if it's good enough they ay message you first. Often the best way to start a conversation etc...."
I need to move to Worcester... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi it happens alot people can be so rude and hurtful "
I've had some lovely people come back to me and say how they like getting polite messages. Even if I'm unsuccessful in making new friends (which I mostly am!) there's no excuse for being rude. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I've had some lovely people come back to me and say how they like getting polite messages. Even if I'm unsuccessful in making new friends (which I mostly am!) there's no excuse for being rude. "
The excuse, apparently, is they gey too many messages to reply to. Or so I've read... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I've had some lovely people come back to me and say how they like getting polite messages. Even if I'm unsuccessful in making new friends (which I mostly am!) there's no excuse for being rude.
The excuse, apparently, is they gey too many messages to reply to. Or so I've read..."
In defence for most of the women on here yes we do get bombarded with loads of messages and it's impossible to reply to every single one of em..
Also you can't win on here as if you don't reply you're branded rude and if you reply with a polite no thank you then you get abuse from men that can't handle rejection 
And I'm not referring that all men are like this before anyone wants to jump on the bandwagon  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Also you can't win on here as if you don't reply you're branded rude and if you reply with a polite no thank you then you get abuse from men that can't handle rejection
And I'm not referring that all men are like this before anyone wants to jump on the bandwagon "
I've never understood abusing someone who politely declines you. Like it will make a difference to their opinion. But the ones that do that are likely to also likely to abuse you if you ignore and delete.
More filters could help here. Ie block messages from smokers or non-athletic guys for example. However from what has been said before, the site will never change...
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I reckon there should be a "thanks but no thanks" button. Simply tick off the messages which don't interest you, press one button and boom it deletes and sends a polite no thank you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yeah juggerphil I understand what you're saying and it's a shame that some people just spoil it for the good ones on here"
I'd have to say I could understand why people would be upset if you rejected them... |
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"I reckon there should be a "thanks but no thanks" button. Simply tick off the messages which don't interest you, press one button and boom it deletes and sends a polite no thank you. "
And I then bet that people would moan that that approach is too impersonal and still requires no real effort than a simple delete anyway, the site can't please everyone |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When people don't reply to my well researched and carefully draughted masterpiece of a message, I assume the were intimidated by my obvious gorgeousness.
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Your profile doesn't make me want to know you.
Think of it as your shop window.
That's prob why no replies.
More effort needed."
Are you flirting with me juggerphil  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I reckon there should be a "thanks but no thanks" button. Simply tick off the messages which don't interest you, press one button and boom it deletes and sends a polite no thank you. "
Totally agree there ?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I reckon there should be a "thanks but no thanks" button. Simply tick off the messages which don't interest you, press one button and boom it deletes and sends a polite no thank you. "
Totally agree there. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" And I then bet that people would moan that that approach is too impersonal and still requires no real effort than a simple delete anyway, the site can't please everyone "
Fair point. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Are you flirting with me juggerphil "
Could be... Although it's very hard to pick up on body language on here. Guess you'll have to try and figure it out... |
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"I gave up ages ago trying to figure people out on here haha"
Like wise; very rarely message anyone new these days, just here to enjoy the banter and if I should catch someone's attentions then that's a bonus. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I gave up ages ago trying to figure people out on here haha"
Fair point, but have you tried the tantrum, block and rant approach? I guess it must work as it seems very popular... ha ha |
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