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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Banned from Sainsbury's! (didn't like shopping there anyway)
Yesterday I was at my local Sainsbury's buying a large bag of PURINA dog food for my loyal pet, and was in the checkout queue when the woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
What did she think I had- an elephant??
so, since i'm a bit 'mature' and have little to think about, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the PURINA diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't because I landed up in hospital last time, but I had lost 2 stones before I woke up in intensive care with tubes coming out of most of my orifices, and IV's in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet, and that the way it works is to ,load your pockets with PURINA nuggets and simply eat one or two every time u feel hungry. the food is nutritionally complete, so it works well, and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in the queue was enthralled by my story)
Horrified, she asked me if I ended up in hospital because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I had stepped off a curb to sniff a rather attractive Irish setters arse, and a car had hit both of us.
I'm now banned from Sainsbury's (Tesco's welcomed me with open arms)
Better watch what you say to 'mature' people. They have a lot more time and life experiences to think up daft things
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Only u mrs b,, guess what martin will have in his pocket for u, note to self:tescos for some purina before next social "
dinnae go to Sainsbury's!!!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Better watch what you say to 'mature' people. They have a lot more time and life experiences to think up daft things
"
And they've heard more jokes to steal  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
Better watch what you say to 'mature' people. They have a lot more time and life experiences to think up daft things
And they've heard more jokes to steal "
didn't 'steal' it, only resurrected it and passed it on  |
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mfao 
x