FabSwingers.com > Forums > Scotland > Don't ask don't get

Don't ask don't get

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I have had this reply so many times lately when I've turned down someone who clearly isn't what I'm looking for on my profile and its got me wondering how many take this approach? Do you read profiles and continue to message even if you don't fit someones criteria? Has it worked for you?

Personally it gets my goat, my opinion is either you havent read my profile to see if you fit, or you're arrogant enough to think you are the exception (they never are

)

Whats others thoughts?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Most chicks on here get messages from guys that havnt read their profiles

An aye or no ta usually takes care of it.

Yes iv had the if you dont ask you don't get comeback and to be honest...its right.

You never know on fab.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Most chicks on here get messages from guys that havnt read their profiles

An aye or no ta usually takes care of it.

Yes iv had the if you dont ask you don't get comeback and to be honest...its right.

You never know on fab."

This is very true

Get the OP's point too though...

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

"I have had this reply so many times lately when I've turned down someone who clearly isn't what I'm looking for on my profile and its got me wondering how many take this approach? Do you read profiles and continue to message even if you don't fit someones criteria? Has it worked for you?

Personally it gets my goat, my opinion is either you havent read my profile to see if you fit, or you're arrogant enough to think you are the exception (they never are

)

Whats others thoughts?"
why not block all guys and search for suitors yourself?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Personally it gets my goat, my opinion is either you havent read my profile to see if you fit, or you're arrogant enough to think you are the exception (they never are

)

Whats others thoughts?why not block all guys and search for suitors yourself?"

Now there’s a girl that knows what she wants

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Not everyones profiles are set in stone tho.. At times there can be room to manuveour at times with age, intrests etc.. Depending on how the chat goes

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Not everyones profiles are set in stone tho.. At times there can be room to manuveour at times with age, intrests etc.. Depending on how the chat goes

Can’t beat a bit of manoeuvring

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Personally it gets my goat, my opinion is either you havent read my profile to see if you fit, or you're arrogant enough to think you are the exception (they never are

)

Whats others thoughts?why not block all guys and search for suitors yourself?"

I have no problem messaging anyone that I'm interested in, I'm in no way complaining about all messages from men so I don't know why I would block all men from messaging, in fact there's no mention of men specifically in my original post.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

In my experience ..

Many profiles never reflect on what the profile projects.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"In my experience ..

Many profiles never reflect on what the profile projects.

Thats very true

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It’s better than the “your loss” reply, well sort of is

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"It’s better than the “your loss” reply, well sort of is

That response always strikes me as slightly sour grapes... though of course it might not be.

Of late I have found most guys are great when chatting etc - well done you lot

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Not everyones profiles are set in stone tho.. At times there can be room to manuveour at times with age, intrests etc.. Depending on how the chat goes

Can’t beat a bit of manoeuvring

There certainly is not and im sure no all have on their profiles everything they have tried or would like to try

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By *V-AliceTV/TS over a year ago

Ayr

I've put "If you're a straight man, looking to meet women - message them, not me.

" as my status quite a few times. It's not entirely effective.

I read profiles and don't waste my time contacting people who aren't interested in meeting me.

I don't blame men for chancing their arm, but I'll block them if they contact me again after I've told them I'm not interested.

I've had the "It's your loss" thing plenty of times. It never has been.

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

" in fact there's no mention of men specifically in my original post.

"
Thats true !

So maybe block all and do your own search then it wont be a problem

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By *ola cubesMan over a year ago

coatbridge

"It’s better than the “your loss” reply, well sort of is

"
weird thought this one if i dont want it how can it be my loss

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

" in fact there's no mention of men specifically in my original post.

Thats true !

So maybe block all and do your own search then it wont be a problem

Thats an idea but not one I think I'll follow. Met far too many lovely people who have had profiles that haven't initially interested me that I would have probably passed by.

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By *ripleXrateDWoman over a year ago

Ayrshire

If it says straight but theyre looking for females I will message if I like them just to find out.

But I would never just try my luck xxxx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Personally it gets my goat, my opinion is either you havent read my profile to see if you fit, or you're arrogant enough to think you are the exception (they never are

)

Whats others thoughts?"

I think it may be your expectations of others that is getting your goat.

Why not adopt the expectation that no one will read your profile before messaging, and on the occasions where someone clearly has, and messaged, take it as an indication of intent.

Hey presto - problem solved.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Personally it gets my goat, my opinion is either you havent read my profile to see if you fit, or you're arrogant enough to think you are the exception (they never are

)

Whats others thoughts?

I think it may be your expectations of others that is getting your goat.

Why not adopt the expectation that no one will read your profile before messaging, and on the occasions where someone clearly has, and messaged, take it as an indication of intent.

Hey presto - problem solved. "

Lol love it

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

Personally it gets my goat, my opinion is either you havent read my profile to see if you fit, or you're arrogant enough to think you are the exception (they never are

)

Whats others thoughts?why not block all guys and search for suitors yourself?

Now there’s a girl that knows what she wants "
of course and not afraid to ask for it lol

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By *rP_TickleMan over a year ago

Glasgow

Surely a decent guy should get credit for reading a profile and being polite.

I hear so much on hear about guys messaging wanna shag etc etc im surprised any guy gets a reply.

I can take a couple of hours and send 20 individually crafted emails with a bitbof with and flirt and im.happy if I get one reply that might lead to a chat.

Knobheads just ruin it for the rest of us.

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By *rP_TickleMan over a year ago

Glasgow

Personally it gets my goat, my opinion is either you havent read my profile to see if you fit, or you're arrogant enough to think you are the exception (they never are

)

Whats others thoughts?

I think it may be your expectations of others that is getting your goat.

Why not adopt the expectation that no one will read your profile before messaging, and on the occasions where someone clearly has, and messaged, take it as an indication of intent.

Hey presto - problem solved. "

Ditto

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Surely a decent guy should get credit for reading a profile and being polite.

I hear so much on hear about guys messaging wanna shag etc etc im surprised any guy gets a reply.

I can take a couple of hours and send 20 individually crafted emails with a bitbof with and flirt and im.happy if I get one reply that might lead to a chat.

Knobheads just ruin it for the rest of us."

The only person that will ruin things for you...is you

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By *imbobaMan over a year ago

Glasgow

"Surely a decent guy should get credit for reading a profile and being polite.

I hear so much on hear about guys messaging wanna shag etc etc im surprised any guy gets a reply.

I can take a couple of hours and send 20 individually crafted emails with a bitbof with and flirt and im.happy if I get one reply that might lead to a chat.

Knobheads just ruin it for the rest of us."

Knobheads seem to be so prolific that they've set the tone and mindset of the ladies here. Totally understandable. And clearly reflected in many female's profiles.

Newish here so only an early day observation. stopping now.

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By *e DevilMan over a year ago

Blantyre

Personally it gets my goat, my opinion is either you havent read my profile to see if you fit, or you're arrogant enough to think you are the exception (they never are

)

Whats others thoughts?

I think it may be your expectations of others that is getting your goat.

Why not adopt the expectation that no one will read your profile before messaging, and on the occasions where someone clearly has, and messaged, take it as an indication of intent.

Hey presto - problem solved. "

Rubbish. If you adopt the expectation that nobody will read your profile then why would you write one in the first place.

Just put up some pictures and if you get a message saying i fancy you then theres your intent that the person is interested.

Hey presto . Problem just increased 10 fold

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By *uzzy-LogicMan over a year ago

Aberdeen

"Surely a decent guy should get credit for reading a profile and being polite.

I hear so much on hear about guys messaging wanna shag etc etc im surprised any guy gets a reply.

I can take a couple of hours and send 20 individually crafted emails with a bitbof with and flirt and im.happy if I get one reply that might lead to a chat.

Knobheads just ruin it for the rest of us."

They can't ruin it for you, only you can.

If anything guys sending short, rude messages without having read a profile would surely make your well written and thoughtout message look better by comparison.

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By *ink-KameraMan over a year ago

Livingston

"Surely a decent guy should get credit for reading a profile and being polite.

I hear so much on hear about guys messaging wanna shag etc etc im surprised any guy gets a reply.

I can take a couple of hours and send 20 individually crafted emails with a bitbof with and flirt and im.happy if I get one reply that might lead to a chat.

Knobheads just ruin it for the rest of us."
I mostly agree with this as unless the recipient is happy to read the one or two decent messages after trawling through the hundreds of "lets fuck" ones your more respectful approach will most likely be deleted unread. I always read the profile but rarely message unless I really believe I am what the person or people are looking for. Respect for the other person seems sadly missing on this site.

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By *acmanmonsterMan over a year ago

inverness

Personally it gets my goat, my opinion is either you havent read my profile to see if you fit, or you're arrogant enough to think you are the exception (they never are

)

Whats others thoughts?"

Personally I check profile before messaging anyone, firstly age group you want to meet, and gender, then the profile information is important. If you don’t want to meet attached, then who am I to try and change your mind, and waste your time. Best bet is to block those who have not read anything. Must admit that this approach so far has brought me no luck whatsoever lol, but I keep hoping something will turn up that suits me and someone else.

Don’t give up, just block the ignorant ones lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Personally it gets my goat, my opinion is either you havent read my profile to see if you fit, or you're arrogant enough to think you are the exception (they never are

)

Whats others thoughts?

Don’t give up, just block the ignorant ones lol "

I agree, isn’t that why fab is set up the way it is. No point firing of 10 one liners/copy and paste job, need to take the time to read the profile and make sure you match the majority before crafting an individual message, better chance of a reply. If no reply, then that’s a clear indication that the recipient is not interested. The search continues, so to speak

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By *ighland gentlemanMan over a year ago

Tain

Interestingly enough, some of my best fab meets have been with hidden profile.

Have to compose the first message very carefully!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Interestingly enough, some of my best fab meets have been with hidden profile.

Have to compose the first message very carefully!

That's not quite true. A hello can kick off some pleasant chat

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Interestingly enough, some of my best fab meets have been with hidden profile.

Have to compose the first message very carefully!

That's not quite true. A hello can kick off some pleasant chat

Absolutely ....with the right people

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Interestingly enough, some of my best fab meets have been with hidden profile.

Have to compose the first message very carefully!

That's not quite true. A hello can kick off some pleasant chat

Absolutely ....with the right people

Well folk are hardly likely to find it pleasant with the wrong ones

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Interestingly enough, some of my best fab meets have been with hidden profile.

Have to compose the first message very carefully!

That's not quite true. A hello can kick off some pleasant chat

Absolutely ....with the right people

Well folk are hardly likely to find it pleasant with the wrong ones

Think most unpleasant ones just put their "names" in lights therefore decent people just giggle at their behaviour.

Dont you think ..?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Interestingly enough, some of my best fab meets have been with hidden profile.

Have to compose the first message very carefully!

That's not quite true. A hello can kick off some pleasant chat

Absolutely ....with the right people

Well folk are hardly likely to find it pleasant with the wrong ones

Think most unpleasant ones just put their "names" in lights therefore decent people just giggle at their behaviour.

Dont you think ..?

Well I certainly get a lot of giggles on here

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By *e DevilMan over a year ago

Blantyre

"Interestingly enough, some of my best fab meets have been with hidden profile.

Have to compose the first message very carefully!

That's not quite true. A hello can kick off some pleasant chat

I agree . If the recipient of the hello likes what they see then its definitely a good start. Unless the profile asks for more than just a hello, which some do.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Interestingly enough, some of my best fab meets have been with hidden profile.

Have to compose the first message very carefully!

That's not quite true. A hello can kick off some pleasant chat

I agree . If the recipient of the hello likes what they see then its definitely a good start. Unless the profile asks for more than just a hello, which some do. "

I agree

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