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Perfect Message Length

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By *amesRobs1987 OP   Man  over a year ago

Brighton

I've been trying to determine what the best length is for that first message and wondered what the consensus on the forum was about this.

Some basic assumptions I think we can all agree are important:

1. No one liners.

2. Be respectful however long a message it is.

3. Make it personal to the individual you're messaging.

I guess what I'm unsure on is how much to pack into that first message. Is anything beyond three paragraphs overkill?

I'm presuming most decisions on whether to message back are still made relatively quickly, and no matter how much of an essay you write you're not going to get a reply if a) there's no attraction from the other person, b) you come across like a dick or c) something about your circumstances / what you're looking for puts them off.

Interested to hear people's thoughts on this. I'm sure there's been dozens of threads on this subject before.

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By *isa2018Couple  over a year ago

East Northamptonshire

The important thing is to read the target profile for any clues on how they like to be contacted. Generally I think 2 or 3 paragraphs is enough start. A brief introduction to yourself, something personal that shows you've read the profile and what your preferences are in regards to what you like or what your boundaries are. We get lots of one liners from people who make the effort to attach a photo and catch S eye, and then get some much better quality messages from some who don't. Each message gives an insight into the senders personality and goes together with a picture to determine whether there might be any attraction to warrant further chat with a view to meeting.

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By *amesRobs1987 OP   Man  over a year ago

Brighton


"The important thing is to read the target profile for any clues on how they like to be contacted. Generally I think 2 or 3 paragraphs is enough start. A brief introduction to yourself, something personal that shows you've read the profile and what your preferences are in regards to what you like or what your boundaries are. We get lots of one liners from people who make the effort to attach a photo and catch S eye, and then get some much better quality messages from some who don't. Each message gives an insight into the senders personality and goes together with a picture to determine whether there might be any attraction to warrant further chat with a view to meeting."

Yeah I guess, without wanting to answer my own question, is that the answer is always going to be 'it depends on who you're messaging'

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