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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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thinking of making my first visit to Chams next week at some point, never been in my life (i know, i know) but going to ask what maybe a realy stupid question, i've had a look at the site, and can see the nights that interest me, but...... this is going to be soooo stupid, i have no idea on the eqiqute side of things how it all workks, anyone give me some pointers, please dont laugh, you were all staring out once up on time |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm with you...i was also wondering what the etiquette was at one of these places for a single man since i have never been before and looking to go (not chams but one more local to me) |
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"thinking of making my first visit to Chams next week at some point, never been in my life (i know, i know) but going to ask what maybe a realy stupid question, i've had a look at the site, and can see the nights that interest me, but...... this is going to be soooo stupid, i have no idea on the eqiqute side of things how it all workks, anyone give me some pointers, please dont laugh, you were all staring out once up on time"
on your own or part of a cpl and what night or day are you thinking of going |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Relax, be polite, TALK to folk, DO NOT follow couples around in the vain hope that something might happen, have a shower so your nice and fresh.. oh and Relax! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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you will also need to be a member of chams so dont just turn up if you aint as you wont get in and theres a very long waiting list for single guy membership |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Probably prudent to telephone before turning up, as you may not gain entry on the night, we have met a lot of guys there who say they have had to wait for a while prior to gaining admission. But the wait is no doubt worth waiting for.
We are intending to visit Thursday during the day, which may be the best time to try and visit as it is a bit quieter.
Hope you enjoy when you do visit.
Elizabeth. |
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By *ibrosMan
over a year ago
harrow |
"Socialise is my advice.. wait to be asked.. and remember you wont be forever one..
Katie.x"
My limited experience tells me that regular clubgoers are as nervous as newbies. Remember that and you are on a more equal footing.
As Katie says, socialise. Say 'hi' and chat. Treat people as you would in any social setting.
Behaving as if you can't wait to jump their bones is unlikely to get you into a decent conversation. |
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Club Etiquette:
Always go to a club with the attitude of “I am only paying to use the facilities”
Always go to a club with the expectation of only using the facilities.
In social areas treat everyone just the same as you would treat fully clothed people in a regular pub.
In open play areas either wait to be invited, be polite and ask or learn to read body language really well… may be it’s best to see how other people’s actions are welcomed or dismissed first.
‘NO’ always means ‘NO’
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"Club Etiquette:
Always go to a club with the attitude of “I am only paying to use the facilities”
Always go to a club with the expectation of only using the facilities.
In social areas treat everyone just the same as you would treat fully clothed people in a regular pub.
In open play areas either wait to be invited, be polite and ask or learn to read body language really well… may be it’s best to see how other people’s actions are welcomed or dismissed first.
‘NO’ always means ‘NO’
"
And to add always come prepared and if go in the main plays areas such as the round room/ cinema always ask is ok to join in dont just push your way in show respect  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Silly things like cost of entry and such like, any info that will help calm my nerves lol"
Ring them, they will calm your nerves, they will tell you everything you need to know, a few guys i know have been and walked out after half an hour or less the first time due to nerves so remember that everyone feels the same, my first visit i was shaking like a leaf but it feels very liberating, although I as a single guy thing' s will be harder (no pun intended) chat to people, be polite, if someone says no thanks, take it on the chin and move on, dont join in without being invited and make sure you have condoms for if you are invited, a lot of single guys are un prepared and end up missing out  If you can, go with a female as a couple, maybe takes the pressure of a little |
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"
And to add always come prepared and if go in the main plays areas such as the round room/ cinema always ask is ok to join in dont just push your way in show respect "
In all honesty... I hate people asking me if it's OK in open play rooms. But it's a personal choice thing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You should keep an eye out for parties organised by members on here, that way it would be cheaper for you plus there are often single ladies looking for a partner |
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you will need to take id ,and pay a joining fee.then pay to get in each time you go .sat is couples only after 6pm.you can park outside where theres a car park attendant. fridays are busiest for single men .you wear a towel or shorts.everyone is really welcoming the staff are really friendly too. |
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I was lucky when I joined, I just asked at the desk if there were any memberships available for single men. The lady asked if I had been to clubs before, which I had and after showing some I.D and paying the joining fee she gave me my membership card. The rules of the club were explained and through the door I went. Going through the door that first time was daunting but everyone inside has been there so don't worry about that.
The people there are friendly, at least those. Who I have met. The rules are common sense really, don't expect to play, be friendly and polite and never pushy, the ladies don't appreciate being followed round!
Above all, relax, its a fantastic club. Good lick.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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jesus christ, so bloody much to take in lol, gona feel like a right knob (excuse pun) walking in with my insturction book, detailed map and so on RATFL x  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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oh i do intend to go, just need to work out if i need my American Excuse card lol, i've no idea how much it will be, that said i've just been mailed by a regular who has offered to take/escort me, but as a lot of you have said, it makes sense to ring first, get all the info i need  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Theres no right and wrong everyone like different
I know some women who go who just go to get on a bed and f**k, they dont want conversation or men to ask...please may i, they just want sex
Where as other woman would like some conversational contact before they play and to be asked to a room
You jusy have to read the signs and decide what kind of a woman they are
Just one rule.....no means no.....not come back in 10 mins and try again then lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Apart from no means no, I have this thing about being touched without asking first - it is an instant turn off for me.
Just because I am sitting naked next to a gent in the jacuzzi does not mean I am fair game!   |
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By *umpkinMan
over a year ago
near the sounds of the wimborne quarter jack! |
You`ve been given some pretty good advice here! The main thing is to ring up before you go and ask if there`s any single male memberships available. Beware that you have a better chance of getting a membership for Monday nights only. This is, however, Bi-Night and supposedly for Bi people only but as long as you`re "Bi friendly" ....
Polo also gave some good advice too about what to expect ... paying for the facilities and not a right to a shag.
And also have a look through the Meets and Events section for the Pussy Possee parties where as long as you`re on the organiser`s list you can get in without membership so you can try before you buy! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Well, I'm just going to go in, get s drink and change, and wonder around a little, try to socialise a little, have a laugh and joke and hopefully out some names to faces I've chatted to, from there,, just tske things real easy and see what happens, in under no illusions that anything el happen, if it does, then good, if not, then good too, I'm not looking at going in there and getting a shag as some would say, it would be nice to strike up a conversation with a few people, and just take it from there, and re what someone else had out about the by nights, its not my scene to be honest, so ill just take things in a laid back manner, I'm in no rush |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Get there early if you can if you are planning to join us at one of the organised parties.
There are more chances to play when the place is not heaving with people - the lockable rooms are more likely to be available, room in the jacuzzi etc. etc...
Hope you to see you there soon! |
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One other point, if you take drink in with you the staff will label it with your locker number and keep it in the fridge behind the bar for you till you want it. If you buy drinks at the bar they put the cost on your tab and you pay when you leave. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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They do not have a license, so the highest strength of alcohol-containing drink is a shandy!
Therefore, if you would like to drink alcohol, bring your own, and hand it over to the staff who will label them up with your key number, to be kept behind the bar as and when you need it.
You would need to buy the mixers to go with your spirits.
The prices they charge are silly IMHO, as they could easily charge a whole lot more and make a mint out of the captive audience.
Hence I love that place - I spend under a tenner normally for soft drinks and a plate of lovely cheesy chips! BARGAIN IMHO!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I went to Chams for my 1st time 2 weeks ago as a couple on a sat night as I'd heard so many good things about it.
I was sooooo nervous! but it's true the people are just so friendly and the staff are too. I never felt any pressure and I said no and the guy backed off without any rude comments.
A guy gave me a good tip, if you do get problem with someone not understanding that no means no, look at his key number and this should warn him off as in he could lose his membership,something a single guy does not want to happen!
Going this Sat 2nd April and I can't wait |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The staff do not keep a register of who got which locker as far as I am aware.
In the event of the need to report someone, telling the staff their locker number would help to identify the person for sure.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I find myself being bothered by a pest who does not take no for an answer, I would not hesitate to go to the bar and report him right away, and to help ID'ing him if required.
Luckily, the way I say no must be effective in getting the message across, as I have yet to report anyone.
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By *umpkinMan
over a year ago
near the sounds of the wimborne quarter jack! |
"Another thing to rem, so much lol"
It does sound daunting I`ll admit, but the biggest hurdle I found was the making the final descision to go!
Once you make that move it`ll be plain sailing, it really will and you`ll wonder what all the fuss was about!  |
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By *umpkinMan
over a year ago
near the sounds of the wimborne quarter jack! |
The only other thing I`ll say is be a Gentleman, well perhaps not too much of a gentleman but you know what I mean. If you`re speaking to a couple, speak to both of them!
And it IS OK to look! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Hoping to go soon, now, towel, shorts (nah), a drink or two, condoms, a given, a towel, credit card (for entry), Oo quick question, if your going with another woman, is the same cost? Anything.I've missed? |
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"Hoping to go soon, now, towel, shorts (nah), a drink or two, condoms, a given, a towel, credit card (for entry), Oo quick question, if your going with another woman, is the same cost? Anything.I've missed?"
The entry fee for a single male is higher than it is for a couple. It's £30 (iirc) for a couple. |
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