FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Regular vs one offs
Regular vs one offs
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Good morning ...given the surprising interest i got from my 'religion & swinging' post last sunday, i thought i would start another.
What are you thoughts on the regular fwb, lover fuck buddy (what do you call them) vs one off meets.
Reason i ask is that i having been seeing a couple for 2.5 yrs now. We met purely by chance on here then they winked me. I have had the honour and fabulous pleasure of meeting her on her own as well....everyone knowing so all wonderful. But for me the idea of being their regular and the fabulous sex we have every time as we know each other buttons just far outweighs any of the one offs i have had in the past. I know you have the 'new' factor but looking back at my one offs i never have hit the heights of what i have now. Hence why i have not had any one off meets for 2.5 years.
Would be great to get yor thoughts.
Ps terrible plug...but having a lunchtime social on 28th in high street kensington. Just drinks and laughs and food. Drop me a ljne if you wish to come. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Very happy for you that you have found a regular couple. It's not easy to find a threeway relationship that works. In 4 years we've had 6 regular single men, 2 of which we are currently seeing, and one of our regulars we have been seeing for 2 years. Regarding our long term playmate, we feel very lucky to have him (not currently on Fab). On the whole we find single men come and go, and with the best will in the world it's actually really hard to find a single man who is available long term for this type of relationship.
Mrs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I had a Fwb on and off for around seven years, he was 15yrs my junior. Had the most amazing sex  . He has found a girl his own age now, but we still keep in touch, we are a little bit flirty too 
Also love to get together with return playmates, soooo much fun....
Also had until very very recently a Fwb fab friend, but alas, it is no longer - our chemistry is mindblowing.
I think what I'm trying to say is, one offs are great, but I love learning how to touch those little spots with someone you see regularly  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Very happy for you that you have found a regular couple. It's not easy to find a threeway relationship that works. In 4 years we've had 6 regular single men, 2 of which we are currently seeing, and one of our regulars we have been seeing for 2 years. Regarding our long term playmate, we feel very lucky to have him (not currently on Fab). On the whole we find single men come and go, and with the best will in the world it's actually really hard to find a single man who is available long term for this type of relationship.
Mrs"
Thank you...not what i was originally looking for but just developed a little further....so much we are reallyvgood friends and respectful of each other.
Realise now that having that 'regular' connection is what is best for me
But yes i suppose both have theor merits. I only play with others with the coiple i see....but thats just me |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I prefer regular is more fun plus if your both open minded even better as you both get over those trust issues x"
Bang on.....total trust between all of us |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Very happy for you that you have found a regular couple. It's not easy to find a threeway relationship that works. In 4 years we've had 6 regular single men, 2 of which we are currently seeing, and one of our regulars we have been seeing for 2 years. Regarding our long term playmate, we feel very lucky to have him (not currently on Fab). On the whole we find single men come and go, and with the best will in the world it's actually really hard to find a single man who is available long term for this type of relationship.
Mrs
Thank you...not what i was originally looking for but just developed a little further....so much we are reallyvgood friends and respectful of each other.
Realise now that having that 'regular' connection is what is best for me
But yes i suppose both have theor merits. I only play with others with the coiple i see....but thats just me"
After 2 years of disappointment in looking for that perfect man to join us to be a special MFM trio, we concluded that didn't really exist, and just decided to swing instead. That's when we became friends with our regular. It's only 2 years later that we concluded he is a regular. These things happen when you don't expect. We do see others though as does he. We won't risk putting all our eggs in one basket again.
Mrs |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Very happy for you that you have found a regular couple. It's not easy to find a threeway relationship that works. In 4 years we've had 6 regular single men, 2 of which we are currently seeing, and one of our regulars we have been seeing for 2 years. Regarding our long term playmate, we feel very lucky to have him (not currently on Fab). On the whole we find single men come and go, and with the best will in the world it's actually really hard to find a single man who is available long term for this type of relationship.
Mrs
Thank you...not what i was originally looking for but just developed a little further....so much we are reallyvgood friends and respectful of each other.
Realise now that having that 'regular' connection is what is best for me
But yes i suppose both have theor merits. I only play with others with the coiple i see....but thats just me
After 2 years of disappointment in looking for that perfect man to join us to be a special MFM trio, we concluded that didn't really exist, and just decided to swing instead. That's when we became friends with our regular. It's only 2 years later that we concluded he is a regular. These things happen when you don't expect. We do see others though as does he. We won't risk putting all our eggs in one basket again.
Mrs"
Great stuff....and congrats..nice tonget what you look for. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Very happy for you that you have found a regular couple. It's not easy to find a threeway relationship that works. In 4 years we've had 6 regular single men, 2 of which we are currently seeing, and one of our regulars we have been seeing for 2 years. Regarding our long term playmate, we feel very lucky to have him (not currently on Fab). On the whole we find single men come and go, and with the best will in the world it's actually really hard to find a single man who is available long term for this type of relationship.
Mrs
Thank you...not what i was originally looking for but just developed a little further....so much we are reallyvgood friends and respectful of each other.
Realise now that having that 'regular' connection is what is best for me
But yes i suppose both have theor merits. I only play with others with the coiple i see....but thats just me
After 2 years of disappointment in looking for that perfect man to join us to be a special MFM trio, we concluded that didn't really exist, and just decided to swing instead. That's when we became friends with our regular. It's only 2 years later that we concluded he is a regular. These things happen when you don't expect. We do see others though as does he. We won't risk putting all our eggs in one basket again.
Mrs"
Classy can you measage me.... |
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I prefer a regular playmate, or couple, to one-offs, not least because sex does get better and more fulfilling with people you know, but also it's more reliable and discreet than arranging meets with strangers who either don't show up, or are not who they purport to be. That being said, we were all strangers until we met that first time  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Very happy for you that you have found a regular couple. It's not easy to find a threeway relationship that works. In 4 years we've had 6 regular single men, 2 of which we are currently seeing, and one of our regulars we have been seeing for 2 years. Regarding our long term playmate, we feel very lucky to have him (not currently on Fab). On the whole we find single men come and go, and with the best will in the world it's actually really hard to find a single man who is available long term for this type of relationship.
Mrs
Thank you...not what i was originally looking for but just developed a little further....so much we are reallyvgood friends and respectful of each other.
Realise now that having that 'regular' connection is what is best for me
But yes i suppose both have theor merits. I only play with others with the coiple i see....but thats just me
After 2 years of disappointment in looking for that perfect man to join us to be a special MFM trio, we concluded that didn't really exist, and just decided to swing instead. That's when we became friends with our regular. It's only 2 years later that we concluded he is a regular. These things happen when you don't expect. We do see others though as does he. We won't risk putting all our eggs in one basket again.
Mrs
Classy can you measage me...."
Great being a regular as i get to escort the gorgeous lady to the social on28th....thats where the trust exists.
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By *yldstyleWoman
over a year ago
A world of my own |
Sex gets better the more you know someone, however there's also a risk of developing feelings.
For that reason if I was ever to start meeting I think I'd stick to one offs or infrequent encounters |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Fwb or fb are all well and good but often feelings become involved."
Think thats inevitable but if you are all adult and respectful then i think it can work. I even play golf with the hubby, its all about knowing the boundaries and where the trust comes in. |
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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago
Northampton Somewhere |
I absolutely prefer regular lovers. For me it's all about trusting someone enough to let them 'push your boundaries' and therefore being able to relax enough to enjoy each other. I mean I'd never let a one off blindfold me for example!!!!   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I prefer to have a few regular hot lovers as the sex gets better. However, I'm a swinger and like group sex at clubs and parties too and that's normally with people I don't know |
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By *epaWoman
over a year ago
Northampton |
"I absolutely prefer regular lovers. For me it's all about trusting someone enough to let them 'push your boundaries' and therefore being able to relax enough to enjoy each other. I mean I'd never let a one off blindfold me for example!!!! "
That's why I'm letting him push my boundaries. He wants to watch me with another guy and then join in.
Trust |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I absolutely prefer regular lovers. For me it's all about trusting someone enough to let them 'push your boundaries' and therefore being able to relax enough to enjoy each other. I mean I'd never let a one off blindfold me for example!!!!
That's why I'm letting him push my boundaries. He wants to watch me with another guy and then join in.
Trust"
Totally agree....and mine have been stretched beyond belief.....i believe i have plenty more boundary pushing to come with my couple as well .
but because there is TRUST there it is all amazing. I have become more uninhibited for sure. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Good morning ...given the surprising interest i got from my 'religion & swinging' post last sunday, i thought i would start another.
What are you thoughts on the regular fwb, lover fuck buddy (what do you call them) vs one off meets.
Reason i ask is that i having been seeing a couple for 2.5 yrs now. We met purely by chance on here then they winked me. I have had the honour and fabulous pleasure of meeting her on her own as well....everyone knowing so all wonderful. But for me the idea of being their regular and the fabulous sex we have every time as we know each other buttons just far outweighs any of the one offs i have had in the past. I know you have the 'new' factor but looking back at my one offs i never have hit the heights of what i have now. Hence why i have not had any one off meets for 2.5 years.
Would be great to get yor thoughts.
Ps terrible plug...but having a lunchtime social on 28th in high street kensington. Just drinks and laughs and food. Drop me a ljne if you wish to come."
Thought I'd weigh in on this as it's quite applicable to us. We have actually found another couple on fab that we really really like. They've fast become great friends, and we do regularly meet up for more than just hanging out  as well as vanilla social stuff. Whilst they're amazing however, we both still like to meet new people and experience what's out there. They feel the same way too. We're not trying to fuck the whole of fab, but we're enjoying looking for others we get on with, even if we are getting regular sex.
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"I prefer a regular playmate, or couple, to one-offs, not least because sex does get better and more fulfilling with people you know, but also it's more reliable and discreet than arranging meets with strangers who either don't show up, or are not who they purport to be. That being said, we were all strangers until we met that first time "
Totally |
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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago
on the hill NordWest of |
I prefer meets with regular(s) every time gets better and you never come home disappointed.
I like to spice things up some fresh meat now and then however it becomes rarer and rarer because of some non experiences. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"both - club meets are more often than not a one off but then again if we hit it off well we arrange to meet up again - love my regular "
Very very lucky regular!! |
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Morning all....
I have a fb but unfortunately we don't get to see each other much... I prefer a regular meet as its more mutually satisfying as you know each other....
Would Love to have your set up with a single guy OP but alas as yet have not found the elusive guy..... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Good morning ...given the surprising interest i got from my 'religion & swinging' post last sunday, i thought i would start another.
What are you thoughts on the regular fwb, lover fuck buddy (what do you call them) vs one off meets.
Reason i ask is that i having been seeing a couple for 2.5 yrs now. We met purely by chance on here then they winked me. I have had the honour and fabulous pleasure of meeting her on her own as well....everyone knowing so all wonderful. But for me the idea of being their regular and the fabulous sex we have every time as we know each other buttons just far outweighs any of the one offs i have had in the past. I know you have the 'new' factor but looking back at my one offs i never have hit the heights of what i have now. Hence why i have not had any one off meets for 2.5 years.
Would be great to get yor thoughts.
Ps terrible plug...but having a lunchtime social on 28th in high street kensington. Just drinks and laughs and food. Drop me a ljne if you wish to come.
Thought I'd weigh in on this as it's quite applicable to us. We have actually found another couple on fab that we really really like. They've fast become great friends, and we do regularly meet up for more than just hanging out as well as vanilla social stuff. Whilst they're amazing however, we both still like to meet new people and experience what's out there. They feel the same way too. We're not trying to fuck the whole of fab, but we're enjoying looking for others we get on with, even if we are getting regular sex.
"
Its great when you can easily slip between vanilla and deviant with your regular....what i do regular....comes back to trust and respect as well as knowing the boundaries.
Thanks for the input...wholeheartedly agree....
great to see some sane people on today
|
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"I had a Fwb on and off for around seven years, he was 15yrs my junior. Had the most amazing sex . He has found a girl his own age now, but we still keep in touch, we are a little bit flirty too
Also love to get together with return playmates, soooo much fun....
Also had until very very recently a Fwb fab friend, but alas, it is no longer - our chemistry is mindblowing.
I think what I'm trying to say is, one offs are great, but I love learning how to touch those little spots with someone you see regularly "
ooo a toy boy in his early 20s! U lucky lady lol(really he's the lucky one) |
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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago
Northampton Somewhere |
"I absolutely prefer regular lovers. For me it's all about trusting someone enough to let them 'push your boundaries' and therefore being able to relax enough to enjoy each other. I mean I'd never let a one off blindfold me for example!!!!
That's why I'm letting him push my boundaries. He wants to watch me with another guy and then join in.
Trust"
It's different for couples though, you already have him to look out for you and keep you safe |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I had an FWB for 3 years, then he buggered off with a vanilla female, I we very fond of him. From now on I,m only doing one offs.x"
Don't give up on a FWB there are loads of guys who would love to have a FWB
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By *iss.RedWoman
over a year ago
somewhere |
I prefer regular meets as I think the sex gets better and I'm more willing to push boundaries with someone I trust. That said, it's not too easy to find and there's still a time and a place for one off meets. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Regular. Sex get better and better with time
Agreed. Threesomes we've had with a regular playmate have got better each time."
totally agree with that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was lucky enough to have the same with a coyple I met. I always felt it was more fun with a regular friend than a one off. But saying that I have some really fun times on a one off basis too. I just like the more intimate feel of a regular meet
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I prefer regular meets as I think the sex gets better and I'm more willing to push boundaries with someone I trust. That said, it's not too easy to find and there's still a time and a place for one off meets."
I agree really miss having a person to meet and explore regularly
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By *ik MMan
over a year ago
Lancashire |
"I prefer regular meets as I think the sex gets better and I'm more willing to push boundaries with someone I trust. That said, it's not too easy to find and there's still a time and a place for one off meets."
This |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Regular, for me. No question.
So much so that I couldn't ever go back to one-offs.
With a known lover, you leave with something they've given you, and vice verses.
Whereas one-offs have only ever made me feel as though I've carved a piece of myself off and given it away.
Hard to explain. Just my personal take. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Regular, for me. No question.
So much so that I couldn't ever go back to one-offs.
With a known lover, you leave with something they've given you, and vice verses.
Whereas one-offs have only ever made me feel as though I've carved a piece of myself off and given it away.
Hard to explain. Just my personal take."
wow....thats a great answer....like that a lot.
Thanks Cleo |
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I am quite primal and so sex is usually better for me with the lovely guys I meet regularly, I can let go more. It takes someone very special to achieve that with me first time, though it has been done.... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I am quite primal and so sex is usually better for me with the lovely guys I meet regularly, I can let go more. It takes someone very special to achieve that with me first time, though it has been done.... "
agreed - letting go is a big thing indeed....have definitely seen that side more from the lovely lady in question as time has past. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Regular, for me. No question.
So much so that I couldn't ever go back to one-offs.
With a known lover, you leave with something they've given you, and vice verses.
Whereas one-offs have only ever made me feel as though I've carved a piece of myself off and given it away.
Hard to explain. Just my personal take."
Although I'm more on the side of one offs, that's a great answer.
I think I do get what you mean. |
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"I had an FWB for 3 years, then he buggered off with a vanilla female, I we very fond of him. From now on I,m only doing one offs.x"
Same. I get attached very quickly so once, twice max. Its better for both parties. |
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By *arry247Couple
over a year ago
Wakefield |
Both, sex with a regular partner can lead to more intense feelings but so can the freedom of knowing no matter what happens you will not meet again.
That allows you to give yourself fully to the moment it also allows you to experiment with things you may not want to repeat.
We are not looking for relationships in meets but the raw passion and excitement of raw sex or carnal lust to be taken and used without a thought of future meets.
Regular partners must by definition think of their partner and by doing so are thereby restrained in their actions as if they don’t they may quickly become past partners rather than regular meets
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Both, sex with a regular partner can lead to more intense feelings but so can the freedom of knowing no matter what happens you will not meet again.
That allows you to give yourself fully to the moment it also allows you to experiment with things you may not want to repeat.
We are not looking for relationships in meets but the raw passion and excitement of raw sex or carnal lust to be taken and used without a thought of future meets.
Regular partners must by definition think of their partner and by doing so are thereby restrained in their actions as if they don’t they may quickly become past partners rather than regular meets
"
Fair point.....and i agree with that too |
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We prefer regulars to one offs. We like to know those we play with well, and usually that leads to great fun for all involved.
For us this isn't about how many different people we can fuck, but more how much more fun we can all have together. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think i like repeat meets because it gives you both a chance to learn what eachother like.
Saying that one offs are good too though. Everyone i meet is with the intention of being a one off. If it was great and i liked them i would absolutely meet again but would be cool if they didnt want to.
The first guy i met from here we met quite a few times quite quickly and to be honest it got a bit userish. I dont want to be in constant communication but i equally dont want to be completly blanked until the next time they are horny |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I like one offs. But would dearly love one or two fb/fwbs and couples for regular meetings. I did have an fwb for 5 years, and really miss that dynamic. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I spent time last year organising group fun for single women and couples and it was all rather shallow, lots of socials and messaging in the build up to the event, then post event no continuation.
I felt like I was totally losing myself in that setup so tried to turn the quality of my meets around and tried to form better lasting friendships with some of the women I was meeting, not just meeting for sex but to hang out too away from the bedroom. I ended up falling head over heels for a couple of women, it wasn't reciprocated and I got burnt quite badly in both instances.
So I reverted to more shallow level one offs, but found them very unsatisfactory and nearly quit Fab and swinging all together.
Since my last round of getting burnt I've been trying to keep things a bit clearer with the people I meet. I realised I wasn't looking for the one, and neither am I looking for a bunch of notches on my bed post.
At the moment I know a couple of women I see fairly regularly and we have a great time. Time in one another's company is for sex, when we're not together we fill our times with filthy messaging and mischief, but all parties are clear, we're fuck buddies and that's where the line ends.
But it's tough to be so intimate with someone and emotion not be drawn in. I'd say FB with a regular playmate is the best thing, so long as all the other factors that go with casual sex don't get in the way.
T |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I spent time last year organising group fun for single women and couples and it was all rather shallow, lots of socials and messaging in the build up to the event, then post event no continuation.
I felt like I was totally losing myself in that setup so tried to turn the quality of my meets around and tried to form better lasting friendships with some of the women I was meeting, not just meeting for sex but to hang out too away from the bedroom. I ended up falling head over heels for a couple of women, it wasn't reciprocated and I got burnt quite badly in both instances.
So I reverted to more shallow level one offs, but found them very unsatisfactory and nearly quit Fab and swinging all together.
Since my last round of getting burnt I've been trying to keep things a bit clearer with the people I meet. I realised I wasn't looking for the one, and neither am I looking for a bunch of notches on my bed post.
At the moment I know a couple of women I see fairly regularly and we have a great time. Time in one another's company is for sex, when we're not together we fill our times with filthy messaging and mischief, but all parties are clear, we're fuck buddies and that's where the line ends.
But it's tough to be so intimate with someone and emotion not be drawn in. I'd say FB with a regular playmate is the best thing, so long as all the other factors that go with casual sex don't get in the way.
T"
Totally agree....one offs leave me feeling rather empty....and find them boring...love the regular scenario as inevitably leads to discussing next time and what can happen |
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"One offs are futile
Explain? "
I don't find them fulfilling I love the intimacy of knowing someone, being able to turn them on by doing almost nothing. My mind has to be on board before I truly enjoy being with someone. Otherwise it's just an orgasm may as well get my rabbit out |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I do prefer regular meets but not so regular it becomes less exciting ! "
Depends how 'regular' you see them dont you think.
Every 3-4 months keeps the anticipation and excitement 
Her x |
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I myself (mrs) quite like one offs, I'm happy with a temporary connection, although mr Tink wouldn't mind repeats...we have discussed it and think it would be cool to have a bunch of couples, about 4 to 8 couples...all totally hot obvs...and mix and match...less risk of catching nasty things if we all stick to each other...it would be impossible to organise that though, we would meet up in turn and every now again all at the same time, we can dream |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The thrill of the chase is a big turn on and a chance to find a hidden gem. So I do like one offs, but regular playmates are generally always going to be more fulfilling in my opinion. As you both clearly turned on by each other. The trust builds so you can be more adventurous and also learn which buttons to press for each other. I had a regular female half of a couple I'd play with. Wed originally started by videoing the meets for her true partner, but that stopped and we just spend time playing. He often drop her off and collect her the following day. Defo a great arrangement |
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"I myself (mrs) quite like one offs, I'm happy with a temporary connection, although mr Tink wouldn't mind repeats...we have discussed it and think it would be cool to have a bunch of couples, about 4 to 8 couples...all totally hot obvs...and mix and match...less risk of catching nasty things if we all stick to each other...it would be impossible to organise that though, we would meet up in turn and every now again all at the same time, we can dream "
we do dreaming..lol.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We prefer the regular ones had one for 6 months and looking for same again..or longer...1 offs OK for clubs but outside clubs only someone we've met and trust.. |
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I was looking for a new fuck buddy and gained a friend with benefits instead which is even better
The sex just gets more and more amazing and I've gained a real friend whom I can talk about anything with
We enjoy couples together too so we get the excitement of one offs as well
The best of both worlds  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I was looking for a new fuck buddy and gained a friend with benefits instead which is even better
The sex just gets more and more amazing and I've gained a real friend whom I can talk about anything with
We enjoy couples together too so we get the excitement of one offs as well
The best of both worlds "
May you live happily ever after. |
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