A guy who likes the feeling of his dick swinging around unrestrained

Man in Newcastle Upon Tyne, North East, UK

Joined: over a year ago
Last on: 6 months ago

Hi there,

Because of premature ejaculation I decided to go to the doctor. When I arrived I flopped out my penis and said "Dr I think I'm premature." After slapping me in the face she said "Damn right you are I'm the receptionist."

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I am an occasionally a hard working guy. Unfortunately I only work on the odd occasion and even then, I tend to call in sick...or to phrase it in a slightly different, yet in a much more accurate, way, I am unemployed & I do not bother calling in sick.

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I get really nervous when women first see me naked for the first time, because usually they run from the park, church or hospital screaming. ..................................................

Gay sex had a always been wrong in my eyes, and one day somebody mentioned that it's supposed to take place in the ass not in the eyes. I now have a different view on the subject.

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I've joined a group not because I'm particular into it I just wanted a widen the circle of my friends.

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The 1st rule of club is: Don't talk about club.

The 2nd rule of club is: Make sure you clip your nails.

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My last girlfriend left me. Her dog died so I went straight out and bought her an identical one. She was livid when I gave it to her, yelling WTF am I supposed to do with two dead dogs? .

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I am a very laid back, easy going kinda guy. Sometimes so laid back I fall over. But I learned early in life how to get back up when I fall over. Thanks Mum and Dad. .

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My family could not decide whether to have mum buried or cremated, so with it being a voting deadlock, we had to let her live.

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I watched porn films backwards when I was little, so naturally I thought it normal to vacuum cum off a girls face, break her washing machine and then leave wearing a tool belt. I should have realised my mistake just from the look on her husbands face as I stood waiting next to their bed holding a vacuum cleaner. .

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I have a memory of an elephant. I remember once I went to the zoo where I saw an elephant.

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I also have a memory-foam mattress, which is now trying to black mail me.

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If you have read to here, firstly why? Secondly, you would have undoubtedly noticed that I am indeed quite the catch. Someone to take home and show off to Mum & Dad...

David

41 years old, Bisexual

6'1" 185cm
Athletic
Non smoker
Social drinker
Some tattoos
No piercings

Looking For

Couples (MF) Couples (MM) Couples (FF) Men Women TV/TS
Aged from 18 to 81
Will meet smokers

Meeting

Can accommodate
Can travel

Interests

Threesomes, Toys, Voyeurism, Watersports, Webcams, Taking Photos, Swingers Clubs, Spanking, Soft Swing, SM, Separate Room Swapping, Same Room Swapping, Role Play, Rimming, Oral, Making Videos, Group Sex, Gangbangs, DP, Dogging, Cybersex, Cuckolding, Cross-dressing, Blindfolds, Anal, Adult Parties

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