Back after a prolonged hiatus....

Couple in South Wales, Wales, UK

Joined: over a year ago
Last on: 1 month ago

After Children, chaos, and existential dread, we’ve resurfaced slightly more jaded, highly efficient, and very much in the mood to make up for lost time. We're not here to collect digital pen pals or audition for beige coffee dates.

We’re only interested in people who are exceptional, unfiltered, and just the right amount of unhinged.

The Hit List: Who We're (Seriously) Seeking

In order of preference because life’s too short to pretend we don’t have favourites:

Single Women (25–55): Sensual, self-aware, and able to string a sentence together without emojis doing the heavy lifting. Bonus points if you can be both filthy and philosophical in the same breath.

Couples (F&F or F&M in that order): We love sexual alchemy with partners who aren't afraid to explore, laugh mid thrust, and can survive a four way debrief with dignity intact.

Please note: If your idea of foreplay is a one-word message or a wink... you've misunderstood the assignment. We're not a vending machine; effort is required!

Let Yourself In....

We’re particularly intrigued by women who like the idea of arriving mid-session voyeur first, then participant. If that excites you, we should talk. If you’d rather have a polite chat over a lukewarm latte... we probably shouldn’t.

We believe in chemistry over chit-chat. If you need 63 back-and-forths before suggesting a meet, this will be a short-lived story.

Meet Your Hosts

M (33): Blonde, sharp-tongued, deliciously curious. Size 12 with 34B breasts and a growing fascination with women especially those with curves, confidence, and a touch of danger. Also enjoys watching J explore while sipping wine like a passive-aggressive dominatrix.

J (39): Athletic build, short hair, and blessed below the belt,allegedly. Strong, silent(ish), and increasingly open to FFM dynamics and group exploration. Can hold a conversation and your hips at the same time.

?? Read This Before You Send Anything

Subject line must read: “2 Fingers” if nothing else, it shows you can follow instructions.

Tell us your fantasy. Not your breakfast !

A face pic is appreciated. Genitals at this stage? No thanks we like suspense, not crime scenes.

Unsolicited friend requests = block + vanish. We’re not desperate, and we’re not blind.

Final Thoughts

We’re sapiosexual sinners with high standards. If you’re dead behind the eyes, allergic to sarcasm, or think "fun" starts and ends with a hot tub and no conversation — we’re not your people.

But if you’ve ever rolled your eyes at a swingers’ profile, muttered “Christ, not another one,” and secretly hoped to find something smarter, filthier, and funnier?

You just might’ve found us.

J & M

30 years old, Bi-curious

5'3" 160cm
Average
Non smoker
Social drinker
No tattoos
No piercings

46 years old, Bi-curious

6'0" 183cm
Athletic
Non smoker
Social drinker
No tattoos
1 or 2 piercings

Looking For

Not looking for single guys
Couples (MF) Couples (FF) Men Women
Aged from 18 to 45
Will meet smokers

Meeting

Can accommodate
Cannot travel

Interests

Webcams, Voyeurism, Toys, Threesomes, Taking Photos, Soft Swing, Separate Room Swapping, Same Room Swapping, Safe Sex, Oral, Making Videos, Group Sex, DP, Dogging, Cuckolding, Blindfolds

Verified Genuine Profile

Friends

d (45) & r (46), Couple
Cuck (45) & Mistress (44), Couple