Premenopausal, mentally unstable, touch of the tism

Woman in No, North West, UK

Joined: 3 weeks ago
Last on: 1 hour ago

Looking for something a little different? Yeah, you won't find that here. Middle aged, slightly overweight, averagely boring with far too high standards for my ugly mug.

I really should know better at my age than to join a sex site. But my therapist said I needed more hobbies and I got kicked out the Womens Institute, and fuck me if I can get the hang of crochet, so here we are...

I'm not particularly fussed about sex, so I really will not meet you now. No, not even you with the sore looking penis, loosen the grip guys eh. And I can guarantee, if I'm online, I am never horny. But as the saying goes if you don't use it you lose it... one can but hope.

Cock worship? Erm, no. Have you ever really looked at one of those things? And they dribble...yuck. Sexual goddess? Eugh. You're about 20yrs too late. I'm in my 40's. It's sex. I get tired easy and I ache everywhere. Can we just have 5-10mins of the intercourse without all the dramatics. Honestly, it's like sitting though the crappy trailers at the cinema waiting for the thing you actually came for.

I come hairy, sometimes with the added bonus of toe and or nipple hair. Don't like that? Oh well.

Verifications. I have none and will never leave you one. Why? Because I'm a grown up that's why. Plus I'm pretty sure I've convinced a few on here I'm actually a male trucker and I'm not ready to let that go just yet.

You - taller than me, yes I really am that tall, low standards, at least half a personality , ruggedly good looking, and have sex on a regular basis, no simps please. I don't want no desperado horny teenager that hasn't seen a real life naked woman in years type. And if you get excited for Tuesdays, exits can be found to your left and right. Married? Girlfriend? Loved up? Yeah I don't really care, if I find you hot i'd still do you. If you don't tell her I won't.

Me - tall. I think we covered that bit. Slightly chubby, pretty hairy and the kinda face you go ewwwwwwww at. But sssshhh it's ok, have a rum and we'll talk.

Still interested ? Then hit me up. I'll probably still ignore you but it gives me something to read before bedtime. Plus it boosts my ego getting messages of adoration (insert annoying flirting emoji).

If by some miracle we happen to meet I can guarantee you will not fall in love with me. You will not want to meet me again and you may have to visit the 24hr pharmacy. Here's to potentially good times!

* None rum drinkers need not apply.

Raven

44 years old, Straight

5'11" 180cm
Average
Non smoker
Don't drink
No tattoos
No piercings

Looking For

Men
Aged from 30 to 56
Won't meet smokers

Meeting

Cannot accommodate
Can travel

Interests

Blindfolds, Group Sex, Making Videos, Oral, Same Room Swapping, Spanking, Swingers Clubs, Taking Photos, Threesomes