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Red 'X' verification for time wasters

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By *ornyAndHung4Fun OP   Man  over a year ago

Lisburn

I've been thinking about this alot, I love the job the admins do on hosting this fantastic fab site, but some users are beginning to ruin the good reputation of fabswingers.com.

Firstly I think everyone should be at least photo verified, this simple action alone would out the vast majority of time wasters.

Secondly if a user has Been reported for abusing other members and failing to turn up for meets etc, then would it not be possible to display a red 'X' mark beside their green verification tick?

The site is excellent as are the hosts, but time wasters and bullies are threatening to ruin it for everyone. Does anyone agree with me?

Is it possible that the site admins could send an email to their users in the form of a survey, just to see how much support this idea would have?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

and maybe fab should spoon feed us?? lol

its too hard to enforce

people should use their own judgement

meeting some decently verified members can help

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By *ornyAndHung4Fun OP   Man  over a year ago

Lisburn

Lol na I'm not campaigning for the spoon feeding just yet lol.

I hear what your saying mate, but it's getting to the point that alot of people are now refusing to meet single guys.

I met someone of here recently and they told me of the abuse and threats that they were receiving from a site member, so I don't blame anyone being scared of meeting guys on their own if we have nutters like that using the site.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I dont think this would work, it would be too easy for them to delete their profile and start a new one without their 'branding' .

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

They would just delete and set up another profile. Fab does have a complaints procedure for reporting 'no-shows/time-wasters' on the Report button on all profiles.

The red X is also open to abuse, i.e one guy refuses to meet me or says yes my bum does look big in that, gets all my friends mailing in to say he's a shit!

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By *ustyBrunette35Couple  over a year ago

birmingham


"

Secondly if a user has Been reported for abusing other members and failing to turn up for meets etc, then would it not be possible to display a red 'X' mark beside their green verification tick?"

Would it be Admin that puts the red X on their profile ? If so, it's paradise for nasty vindictive people who want to play games, how would someone provide proof to Admin that someone failed to turn up to a meet?

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By *ornyAndHung4Fun OP   Man  over a year ago

Lisburn

It could work almost in the same way as the eBay system, where you provide proof of arraging meets such as attaching fab mails that have been swapped through the site. And that way the other user being accused has the option to provide evidence that they actually cancelled the meet.

As for deleting and setting up a new account, that's where the photo verification comes in handy, that would make it extremely hard for users to simply open a new account.

The point about getting all your friends to report a certain member, that would clearly be abuse of the system and then you could be X'd

I'm not saying my proposal is perfect, far from it, but it's an idea that all members could work on and then submit the proposal to the admin providing it has public support

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By *ustyBrunette35Couple  over a year ago

birmingham

I'll be honest, I couldn't support any of the suggestions put forward.

Sorry x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I've been thinking about this alot, I love the job the admins do on hosting this fantastic fab site, but some users are beginning to ruin the good reputation of fabswingers.com.

Firstly I think everyone should be at least photo verified, this simple action alone would out the vast majority of time wasters.

Secondly if a user has Been reported for abusing other members and failing to turn up for meets etc, then would it not be possible to display a red 'X' mark beside their green verification tick?

The site is excellent as are the hosts, but time wasters and bullies are threatening to ruin it for everyone. Does anyone agree with me?

Is it possible that the site admins could send an email to their users in the form of a survey, just to see how much support this idea would have?"

You're suggesting this after not turning up for a car park meet 3 times on the run over the past few weeks ? after all the messages you sent me ?

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By *olton2 4funCouple  over a year ago

BOLTONb

i agree with the photo veri bit with modern tech a new profile with a photo can be scanned against a banned list soon get rid of the peeps who spoil this site for the genuine peeps on here and allso your veri pic is never shown so no excuse not to be photo verified i think it should be compulsery before your profile goes on site live rant over c+p xx

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By *ornyAndHung4Fun OP   Man  over a year ago

Lisburn

Lol I see exactly the point your trying to prove, although the system I suggest wouldn't allow you to make them accussations because you'd have to forward any mail to the admins for any arrangements 'we made'

And plus I live in a different country than you so meeting you in a car park would be slightly hard lol.

But I get the point your trying to make, although I don't think you fully understand my proposal, false accussations like yours could never be proved under the submitting evidence theory.

Maybe I just haven't explained this to well lol

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By *ornyAndHung4Fun OP   Man  over a year ago

Lisburn

Yeah that's the point I was trying to make, although you've explained it better than I clearly have.

It's about keeping this site fun, I bet everyone knows numerous genuine people who have left the site because of what I mentioned in my original post.

And the more genuine people leave then the more time wasters begin to out number us.

I'm worried that like bebo, spammers and time wasters will eventually ruin this fab site if rules are tightened at some stage

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Or......

....... you use the time old more accurate system whereby you arrange to meet in a neutral place for a quick coffee or a drink to suss each other out before any play meets are arranged.

It's always worked for me.

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By *olton2 4funCouple  over a year ago

BOLTONb

thats all very well if whoever u are meeting turns up as a couple me an carole dont get much free time so we think our time is more important spent meeting gen people than wasting our time on no shows

c+p xx

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By *ornyAndHung4Fun OP   Man  over a year ago

Lisburn

But time wasters would also stand you up at coffee meets also pet.

My theory isn't perfect, it's only an idea that's open for an educational debate really. It might go somewhere or it might not.

It's about getting more imput from the sites members about how to improve their experiences of the site, and to rid it of time wasters. I personally think photo verification should be a must, as another member pointed out, there's no excuse of not being photo verified, as it's a private pic never to be seen

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Lol I see exactly the point your trying to prove, although the system I suggest wouldn't allow you to make them accussations because you'd have to forward any mail to the admins for any arrangements 'we made'

And plus I live in a different country than you so meeting you in a car park would be slightly hard lol.

But I get the point your trying to make, although I don't think you fully understand my proposal, false accussations like yours could never be proved under the submitting evidence theory.

Maybe I just haven't explained this to well lol"

OK, you sent me a message begging me to suck your cock, I said yes I would, meet arranged, done and dusted.... that's the bit admin would see as proof yeah ?

You arrived at secluded toilet in dingy car park, I never turn up.... you report me to admin saying I didn't attend so red X me..... I say I did turn up and your cock smelt of cheesey sweaty crotch and wouldn't do the deed and it's infact you that deserves the big red X ....

How can any of this be proven ?

I understand where you're comong from with the timewaster thing but it's simply something that could never work.

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By *ornyAndHung4Fun OP   Man  over a year ago

Lisburn

Yeah maybe so mate you could be right and it may not work, but I believe it can under the right guide lines.

I'm not suggesting for one minute that if someone reports you that you should instantly get a red 'x'

I believe it should depend on your history of successful meets and only be subjected to a red x if a number of genuine reports are filed against you, each one backed up by the necessary evidence. Almost like the eBay feed back system, I'd never order anything from someone on eBay with a 80% feedback.

Get where I'm going with this? Lol

Maybe it could work maybe it won't, but at least the issues have been raised and people are having a civilised debate about it. Maybe someone has an even better idea that I could end up supporting even more than my own lol.

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By *ustyBrunette35Couple  over a year ago

birmingham

OP - You mentioned you think photo verification is a must... Why ?

I'm not photo verified, would I be treated or looked at any differently if I was ?

xx

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By *ornyAndHung4Fun OP   Man  over a year ago

Lisburn

Wrong, I said people should be photo verified at least!!!

You have been verified by other members which is better than photo verification obviously.

But unless some people actually attend meets with bags over their heads I see no problem with photo verification.

There's guys on here pretending to be women or couples, therefore wasting the time of anyone who has arranged a meet, swapped mails, sent winks or even spent the time to read their fake profiles.

It can only make the website stronger and more reliable and fun to use, if u know that the person your talking to is verified, I think admin even realised this as they removed the option of verify by phone

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By *ustyBrunette35Couple  over a year ago

birmingham

You said this, which is why I asked the question.

"I personally think photo verification should be a must, as another member pointed out"

xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"OP - You mentioned you think photo verification is a must... Why ?

I'm not photo verified, would I be treated or looked at any differently if I was ?

xx"

if u had no verification of any sort I'd be seeking something more than just the pics on ur profile.I was asked for a meet a few days ago...she had one verify that i didnt really trust to be honest.I'd asked for some sort of phonecall before I even thought about going to meet.nothing came...

apparently that was me timewasting and attaching strings lol

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By *ornyAndHung4Fun OP   Man  over a year ago

Lisburn

My original post clearly stated I think people should be photo verified at least, unless you want me to include the original post with every post I reply to.

So if I've confused you then I apologise, I'll reiterate that I think people should be photo verified at least!

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By *ustyBrunette35Couple  over a year ago

birmingham

"apparently that was me timewasting and attaching strings lol"

Be carefull, you could get a red X

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By *ustyBrunette35Couple  over a year ago

birmingham


"My original post clearly stated I think people should be photo verified at least, unless you want me to include the original post with every post I reply to.

So if I've confused you then I apologise, I'll reiterate that I think people should be photo verified at least!"

It was the post I quoted that I was wondering about, not your original one, the conversation had moved on xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

The thing with e-bay is that you can ONLY leave feedback once a transaction HAS been made between two people, so that's the proof that someone has bought something from another person, THEN they are able to leave comments where as people meeting on here, how would you prove you met or didn't meet to start with, that's the main flaw in this idea, an idea that's been brought up many many times already.

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By *ornyAndHung4Fun OP   Man  over a year ago

Lisburn

Lol

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By *ugby 123Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

Here is an explanation from Admin from another thread on how they deal with reports.

******Just a quick note. If people report others and we can verify that they have broken site rules, we always take action (either a first and final warning, partially suspended account, fully suspended, mixture of the above).

Every single report sent via the REPORT link is reviewed. Clearly it's not in our interests to have people on here who are bad for the site. Equally we need to verify what has been reported and be fair to those who have been reported.

Admin

PS. we never provide feedback on what has happened. It's just not practical given that we get 100s of reports a day.

Here is what the page says after a report has been submitted:

--

Your feedback has been saved.

A website admin will shortly review your feedback and take the necessary action. After reviewing the evidence available to us, we may disable an account, remove a user, disable certain aspects of that user's account or issue a warning.

By leaving feedback you help improve the site for everyone who uses it. Thank you.******

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By *ornyAndHung4Fun OP   Man  over a year ago

Lisburn

Good post

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By *ugby 123Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

I know it doesn't answer what you are after, but shows how Admin deal with things. I think sometimes people assume as they don't hear anything that nothing gets done.

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By *ornyAndHung4Fun OP   Man  over a year ago

Lisburn

Yeah I understand what you mean, and I have no doubts that the admins on this site do a fantastic job, my idea was really only an open debate to see if members fell the same way, so far it doesn't look to have full support, so maybe my idea is flawed, but at least it's got everyone debating lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It's an issue that's brought up very often though nothing ever happens because there is no way of it been applied correctly.

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By *ugby 123Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

I think it is open to abuse , and to be honest, I am guessing by the way Admin have said they deal with reports that if people continue to break rules a red cross on a profile wouldn't be needed as they would have been disabled.

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By *ornyAndHung4Fun OP   Man  over a year ago

Lisburn

Ok so the red x idea maybe wasn't the best, and some very valid points have been raised.

So what's peoples views on standard profile verification then?

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By *ugby 123Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo


"

So what's peoples views on standard profile verification then?"

You really want to know? lol

I still think that should be by choice of wether people want to do it or not, just as it is peoples choice wether to get in touch with unverified people.

The site gives you lots of options to cut down on timewasters and you also have an option to report anyone who you think is fake....Admin welcome reports even if unfounded and appreciate people who do report to make the site work better.

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By *ornyAndHung4Fun OP   Man  over a year ago

Lisburn

It's just I've seen good genuine people leave the site because they feel there's to many time wasters using it, and the more genuine people who leave then the less fun it becomes

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By *ugby 123Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

I think then maybe the site isn't for them, or any other site really , as all sites get timewasters.

I don't know what the answer is or wether timewasters can be stopped 100%, but I do know Admin are doing all they can to get rid of any fake profiles, they just need everyones help in reporting.

PS...we have never encountered a timewaster yet on this site....we could be just lucky.....or maybe we are just have a good BS detector

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


" Firstly I think everyone should be at least photo verified, this simple action alone would out the vast majority of time wasters."

No way on God's green earth will there ever be a picture of either of us with a piece of paper with the site name on it. Kind of hard to pass off if anyone ever found it on the laptop or if someone sent our profile to friends/family.

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By *ornyAndHung4Fun OP   Man  over a year ago

Lisburn


" Firstly I think everyone should be at least photo verified, this simple action alone would out the vast majority of time wasters.

No way on God's green earth will there ever be a picture of either of us with a piece of paper with the site name on it. Kind of hard to pass off if anyone ever found it on the laptop or if someone sent our profile to friends/family. "

The photo verification pic is never showed on ur profile and after you upload it to the site you can easily remove it from your laptop.

But again this is only a debate, and I don't necessary mean it has to be photo verified, just a standard verification. I was on a site before as a couple with an ex and we were verified by the admins ringing and speaking to us both. I'm sure there is other ways of verification, maybe a friend on the site recommends you etc. The vast majority of people will submit a pic, that's what I done originally, but each to their own I suppose

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Just feel you are trying to help and nearly everyone shooting you down perhaps if some of the ladys spent a month as a single man they would know how hard it is due to lots of timewasting men

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 07/06/12 10:38:04]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I am not photo verified, but do meet people at socials etc. Does that make me a time waster or a bad person? No.

Verifications of the photo type are an easy way for single men to appear genuine in my opinion, doesnt mean they are not a time waster, just means they can operate a camera timer and hold a bit of paper.

I will stick to getting my verifications in the flesh thank you.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Also to above post - include all sexes and profiles in photo verification - dont want to discriminate!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Just feel you are trying to help and nearly everyone shooting you down perhaps if some of the ladys spent a month as a single man they would know how hard it is due to lots of timewasting men"

no one stops anyone from getting meets,

if they wernt guys on the site who were timewasters then you would get even less sex/meets because they would be far more suitable comptition to choose from

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By *ophieslutTV/TS  over a year ago

Central

Maybe a traffic lights system could work well, as a variation on that suggestion.

A red X would just mean the profile doesn't get used, and none of us would likely meet them.

A traffic light system would allow users to know how far they're getting to suspension etc, if green is visible to everyone, the default setting, but once someone infringes some aspect of site rules, they get a light amber warning light, which only they could see at first. As the amber light increases intensity, it could then become public, assuming the user has continued to infringe rules.

Obviously this would not replace immmediate cancelation of membership, where serious rule breaking has occured, but would serve firstly as a personal warning system to a user, and later on, a public warning system. There could always be a countdown timer too, showing how long before amber goes to green, if they've been acting appropriately.

This might help prevent multiple accounts being created, where users repeatedly break rules.

Feedback is important for people to help shape their behaviour, and the quicker it's given, the more it's taken on board, according to psychological studies. Admin do a hard job as it is, as some members are just antisocial and blatantly disregard/disrespect others and Fab's rules.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I don't think that's fare as I'm a retain fireman and I've had to cancel a meet before because I had been called out! It happens sometimes and it's not my fault if there's a fire 'so am I a timewaster'. I would like to add it seems people are meeting with there friends on here, I don't mean people they've met on here, I mean only people they know outside the site and getting verified that way!..

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

As a relative newbie I nearly had all my fun spoilt by a guy who became very very possessive with me and sent me a torrent of abuse when I cancelled a meet. I'd cancelled it because I had my monthly friend visiting, when I explained that to him his reply was, "I don't mind a bit of red!" and when I told him that I wasn't going to be exclusive with him he turned nasty, calling me a slag, slut and all the other names you can think of. I wasn't sure whether this counted as "abuse" as it happened via text after exchanging numbers. I now am very wary of letting people have my number and always insist on a social meet first.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

a reputation meter would be good i think

it keeps track of a reputation score based on conduct on the site,

every verification gives postitive scores which help keep your reputation in the green,

but you could have a system where the blocks in the last 3 months take effect and take points off the reputation,

now so many blcoks is to be expected as some people do use them to stop people contacting again after not interested, but if someones getting blocked everyday by someone new etc then it could take away repuation points and the logo would go from green to yellow to red.

you could then apply a filter for people with certain colour reputation only allowed to message.

not only would it help show someones a good member, but would also give the potential for better conduct from people who dont really care about being blocked.

as lets face it, if your a twat and for what ever reason get blocked off that other person then you have only blown it with them, no one has a clue you been blocked so other people can still be contacted and they might think your a great memeber when really your not.

if you had the reputation icon/bar then it would show if someones account recieves alot of negative attention. people would have incentive to conduct themselves better as a poor repuation could cost them meets

other things like chat bans or being reported for something and the case being upheld and dealth with also could detract from someones repuation, where other stuff such as verifications etc would add to it.

would give a decent way of seeing if someones a good member or not based on their conduct with other members

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I like the idea of a grading system for verifications etc but I personally use the block button if someone messages me and asks for something I'm not into so that might make people lose their grading.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We love our new hobbie but we have major commitments that at the last Minet might mean we have to cancel - though we would do everything in our power to avoid it - and we never have cancelled in any one but there is always that our commitments would make us cancel because they are our priorty - so to get and X because I put my priortys first would leave a very bad taste in my mouth - I think if you get to know someone quite well before u arrange a meet u shud hav gained a mutual trust

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By *ess von teaseWoman  over a year ago

perth


"I'll be honest, I couldn't support any of the suggestions put forward.

Sorry x "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

not a good idea. Ppl Will just abuse it...

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By *ikeC81Man  over a year ago

harrow

Interesting points....for me I would suggest that people take the chance to think...

Like others I have been turned down at last min, as,well as having to,turn,others down due to,work commitments.

Remember there are a lot of people with children on here that sometimes family comes first

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Just feel you are trying to help and nearly everyone shooting you down perhaps if some of the ladys spent a month as a single man they would know how hard it is due to lots of timewasting men"

Try a day as a single female .... just saying

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Why dont you go the whole hog and just have admin pair us all up lol....come on life is full of disappointments and you just gotta accept that nothing ...even Fab...is perfect. Your not gonna have fireworks at every meet, your not gonna have every arrangement work out perfectly and people will let someone, somewhere down at some point whether it's because of cold feet, something coming up or even because they get a kick out of it who knows....we are all adults and surely don't need all this carry on ...the site is what it is and people will be who they are....use your judgement and if its a no show, get pissed about it if you want then move on....

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By *z ThongzWoman  over a year ago

Lanarkshire


"Why dont you go the whole hog and just have admin pair us all up lol....come on life is full of disappointments and you just gotta accept that nothing ...even Fab...is perfect. Your not gonna have fireworks at every meet, your not gonna have every arrangement work out perfectly and people will let someone, somewhere down at some point whether it's because of cold feet, something coming up or even because they get a kick out of it who knows....we are all adults and surely don't need all this carry on ...the site is what it is and people will be who they are....use your judgement and if its a no show, get pissed about it if you want then move on.... "

A+

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Amen to that mate stop on ......

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By *z ThongzWoman  over a year ago

Lanarkshire

Another thought about this ,,,,,,,,, having been on the site over 2 and a half years in total , i have seen many times folks asking in rooms for someone to verify them or saying i cant pm coz i aint verified then next thing u see someone saying ok done , now if people are gonna give verifications on such a willy nilly basis are others surpised that verified users turn out to be timewasters , so take responsibility on ur own behalf and only ever verify someone u meet , forget cam veris coz they only prove the person is male or female they dont prove someone is genuinely gonna meet , if people only verified folks who really met then perhaps the verified tick on someones profile would hold a little more clout , just a thought

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Great idea o recently travelled and paid for hotel and she never showed up and she is still on line

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Having read plenty of similar threads - there's no fool proof solution!

Common sense should always be the driving force - and if you're ever in doubt - back off til you're sure! And if that means only arranging to meet following phone calls, web camming or socials - that's your choice. Likewise - you can choose to contact and be contacted only by meet verified people.

Someone has to give newbies the benefit of the doubt - we were all new and unverified once - but it's always your responsibility - not the site or admins to manage your own activities!!

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By *j_markCouple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Totteridge/Whetstone


"Great idea o recently travelled and paid for hotel and she never showed up and she is still on line "

Don't ever do this because you just set yourself up to be disappointed. From www.fabswingers.com/faq

Do you have any tips for safe meeting?

Don't forget that the only person responsible for your safety is you, so don't put yourself in a situation where a stranger can let you down. These are some tips to help:

* Don't give strangers your home phone number, your usual mobile number or your address or let them know where you work. Buy a spare PAYG SIM for your mobile and use it for initial contacts.

* Don't rely on strangers for transport, so don't agree to go somewhere in a car with someone you don't know.

* Don't turn up to strange addresses without having met the people you're expecting, first, beforehand.

* Always meet first somewhere safe and public (a cafe) first.

* Always tell someone you trust who you're going to meet, and where.

* Don't arrange meets without having spoken to the people you're expecting to meet first on phone OR on seen on cam.

* Don't invite strangers into your home.

* Don't put yourself in a situation where if someone doesn't turn up, you'll be upset. So don't travel 100s of miles and book into a hotel in the expectation of meeting someone unless you've met them beforehand.

Attending an organised social or a swinging club meet is a good place to start.

Admin x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Why dont you go the whole hog and just have admin pair us all up lol....come on life is full of disappointments and you just gotta accept that nothing ...even Fab...is perfect. Your not gonna have fireworks at every meet, your not gonna have every arrangement work out perfectly and people will let someone, somewhere down at some point whether it's because of cold feet, something coming up or even because they get a kick out of it who knows....we are all adults and surely don't need all this carry on ...the site is what it is and people will be who they are....use your judgement and if its a no show, get pissed about it if you want then move on.... "

admin says we're a 100% match......

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Why dont you go the whole hog and just have admin pair us all up lol....come on life is full of disappointments and you just gotta accept that nothing ...even Fab...is perfect. Your not gonna have fireworks at every meet, your not gonna have every arrangement work out perfectly and people will let someone, somewhere down at some point whether it's because of cold feet, something coming up or even because they get a kick out of it who knows....we are all adults and surely don't need all this carry on ...the site is what it is and people will be who they are....use your judgement and if its a no show, get pissed about it if you want then move on....

admin says we're a 100% match......"

You behave! lolol

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By *ardrod991Man  over a year ago

city

Hi I must agree that there has to be something done about messers and fake users, I as a single guy feels at a disadvantage, I really think that people should only verified only throught being met in person no other way, also if these people are messing around 1 person they are doing the same to other people and more than 1 complaint about the same user should be investigated, and then there should be action taken, However nobody is going to like everyone that they meet but as long as there is respect shown to both parties thats all that is required, in the case of couples please let use know if you are interested in guys or not but its is nice that at least you read our messages but it would be nice to at least reply and let us know that you are interested its just a yes or no answer, we are all here for mutal respect and enjoyment and a bit of fun,

this is what think.

Regards

Martin

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

naming and shaming in other words..which isn't allowed

as for the photo verification we don't have one as we don't feel we have to justify ourselves to anyone. It's easier to just pass us by if you don't trust our profile. we don't display our meet veris for the same reason. they're nobody else's business

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By *exyswingersCouple  over a year ago

nottingham


"Great idea o recently travelled and paid for hotel and she never showed up and she is still on line

Don't ever do this because you just set yourself up to be disappointed. From www.fabswingers.com/faq

Do you have any tips for safe meeting?

Don't forget that the only person responsible for your safety is you, so don't put yourself in a situation where a stranger can let you down. These are some tips to help:

* Don't give strangers your home phone number, your usual mobile number or your address or let them know where you work. Buy a spare PAYG SIM for your mobile and use it for initial contacts.

* Don't rely on strangers for transport, so don't agree to go somewhere in a car with someone you don't know.

* Don't turn up to strange addresses without having met the people you're expecting, first, beforehand.

* Always meet first somewhere safe and public (a cafe) first.

* Always tell someone you trust who you're going to meet, and where.

* Don't arrange meets without having spoken to the people you're expecting to meet first on phone OR on seen on cam.

* Don't invite strangers into your home.

* Don't put yourself in a situation where if someone doesn't turn up, you'll be upset. So don't travel 100s of miles and book into a hotel in the expectation of meeting someone unless you've met them beforehand.

Attending an organised social or a swinging club meet is a good place to start.

Admin x"

100 percent spot on xxxx

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By *l coupleCouple  over a year ago

Glasgow

How bout this?

You haven't arranged to meet us, but we tell fab you did and you get a red x. No-one will ever meet you again.

People lie. Fab can't always take everyone's word for stuff really.

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By *reenonionsMan  over a year ago

Nr Exeter

Crikey people,

All good and interesting discussion and as a guy I find it hard to find a non skank and then get her to chat so I see value in some kind of red X type warning.

The problem is that it's always going to be subjective and therefore possible to be misrepresentative. And, why would admin want to get mixed up in a bitchout?

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By *njamesMan  over a year ago

Swindon

I think the easiest way is to just block that person and have done with it. The proposal is a good idea in theory, but impossible to control or manage.

I tend to stick to verified users with user meet verification's, never failed me yet...simple's....

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By *ardrod991Man  over a year ago

city

well if a couple or single are interested in each other they should at least speak on the phone first wherther its a Mobile phone that is dedicated to fun or whatever, A meeting between people should be in a public palce first before going into a private situation,but people that a relly genuine should have nothing to fear by this because it would be better for eveyone and the good name of the site, I am other sites that have turned into nothing more than a talking shop because a place that single guys are not welcome its not nice, all I look for honesty and respect,

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It could work almost in the same way as the eBay system, where you provide proof of arraging meets such as attaching fab mails that have been swapped through the site. And that way the other user being accused has the option to provide evidence that they actually cancelled the meet.

As for deleting and setting up a new account, that's where the photo verification comes in handy, that would make it extremely hard for users to simply open a new account.

The point about getting all your friends to report a certain member, that would clearly be abuse of the system and then you could be X'd

I'm not saying my proposal is perfect, far from it, but it's an idea that all members could work on and then submit the proposal to the admin providing it has public support"

But we have verifications to say what they are like, how good the service was

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By *atisfy janeWoman  over a year ago

Torquay


"naming and shaming in other words..which isn't allowed

as for the photo verification we don't have one as we don't feel we have to justify ourselves to anyone. It's easier to just pass us by if you don't trust our profile. we don't display our meet veris for the same reason. they're nobody else's business"

Totally agree with you....I haven't ever been photo verified either, see no need to as I get all the meets I want from the site....

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Hi I must agree that there has to be something done about messers and fake users, I as a single guy feels at a disadvantage, I really think that people should only verified only throught being met in person no other way, also if these people are messing around 1 person they are doing the same to other people and more than 1 complaint about the same user should be investigated, and then there should be action taken, However nobody is going to like everyone that they meet but as long as there is respect shown to both parties thats all that is required, in the case of couples please let use know if you are interested in guys or not but its is nice that at least you read our messages but it would be nice to at least reply and let us know that you are interested its just a yes or no answer, we are all here for mutal respect and enjoyment and a bit of fun,

this is what think.

Regards

Martin"

people shouldnt be forced to reply, and messers and fake users are not to blame to you not getting as many meets as you want out of the site

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I think it is open to abuse , and to be honest, I am guessing by the way Admin have said they deal with reports that if people continue to break rules a red cross on a profile wouldn't be needed as they would have been disabled.

"

Pokes Mrs Rugger (evil wink) fully agree, had meets which were nice long steamy and others left after 3 minutes. Does that mean we are time wasters ? Such a system would be open to misuse and then again for example a group of "friends with benefits" you say or do something wrong to one and guess the whole group has a go at you... Think Rugger is right (mutters 1 day will get mrs rugger) .. and by the way think this topic has been written on about 2 billion times H. xxx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Will Never work, will be full of single disgruntled guys red xing everyone who choose not to meet them, hell we had one yesterday who even had a go at us for just looking at his profile and didnt ask to meet him!!!!

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By *ood girl Bad GirlTV/TS  over a year ago

Huntingdon,Cambridgeshire


"I've been thinking about this alot, I love the job the admins do on hosting this fantastic fab site, but some users are beginning to ruin the good reputation of fabswingers.com.

Firstly I think everyone should be at least photo verified, this simple action alone would out the vast majority of time wasters.

Hi.

Very well said,coudnt agree more.

Secondly if a user has Been reported for abusing other members and failing to turn up for meets etc, then would it not be possible to display a red 'X' mark beside their green verification tick?

The site is excellent as are the hosts, but time wasters and bullies are threatening to ruin it for everyone. Does anyone agree with me?

Is it possible that the site admins could send an email to their users in the form of a survey, just to see how much support this idea would have?"

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By *ood girl Bad GirlTV/TS  over a year ago

Huntingdon,Cambridgeshire


"I've been thinking about this alot, I love the job the admins do on hosting this fantastic fab site, but some users are beginning to ruin the good reputation of fabswingers.com.

Firstly I think everyone should be at least photo verified, this simple action alone would out the vast majority of time wasters.

Hi.

Very well said,coudnt agree more.

Secondly if a user has Been reported for abusing other members and failing to turn up for meets etc, then would it not be possible to display a red 'X' mark beside their green verification tick?

The site is excellent as are the hosts, but time wasters and bullies are threatening to ruin it for everyone. Does anyone agree with me?

Is it possible that the site admins could send an email to their users in the form of a survey, just to see how much support this idea would have?"

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By *ounghornycouple1988Couple  over a year ago

bathgate

I noticed someone above mentioning about cam veris cannot be trusted please explain how as we have not had meet but been verified via cam as at least 1 of us one each nite on chat some how this onli proves we couple then

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think admin have said in the past all it would do, is encourage people to start a new profile and carry on the same regardless.

Use the current tools to help you filter out undesirables and use your own common sense (if you have any) to out even more.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I noticed someone above mentioning about cam veris cannot be trusted please explain how as we have not had meet but been verified via cam as at least 1 of us one each nite on chat some how this onli proves we couple then

"

cam verify???

I can record anything I see on my screen...this could be someone elses cam.

a cam verification doesnt show u went through with a meet- so nobody has indeed met u in person

special filters on cams can make ugly people look hot..I should know as I apply 25 filters

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I noticed someone above mentioning about cam veris cannot be trusted please explain how as we have not had meet but been verified via cam as at least 1 of us one each nite on chat some how this onli proves we couple then

Aww your just too damn clever lol x

cam verify???

I can record anything I see on my screen...this could be someone elses cam.

a cam verification doesnt show u went through with a meet- so nobody has indeed met u in person

special filters on cams can make ugly people look hot..I should know as I apply 25 filters "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

if your sick of rude people / time wasters then really you need to look at your selection process

no ones going to have a timewaster stamp on their profile,

but you can certintally raise your standards to meet which should help cut it down, if you want someone to have a timewaster mark, then why dont you set your own criteria of what you need to avoid them

maybe a set number of verifications, public photos, other stuff like this, after all you want a profile to have a timewaster mark, that wont stop you getting people wasting your time, as even with this system you would have new people wasting your time too!

so why not look at verifications etc, you decide the criteria, but for example you could be like: ok they have ten verifications, they have passed my timewaster test and i'll message them/reply

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By *ounghornycouple1988Couple  over a year ago

bathgate

Some of us aren't not 'cam wise' enough to be able to apply filter all I do is connect n go on chat so your saying tht basically fake thn???????

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Some of us aren't not 'cam wise' enough to be able to apply filter all I do is connect n go on chat so your saying tht basically fake thn??????? "

If I'm searching for males(straight or bi..just to help me out to a party)...and I see cam verifies..they dont encourage me at all

Ive sat talking to some and I get 20 questions then they back out

I'm selective and really only contact those I know are ready to meet.I'm not saying they are fake or timewasters..just that they are not ready to get out of the fantasy of swinging.

same goes for some cpls

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman  over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!


"I noticed someone above mentioning about cam veris cannot be trusted please explain how as we have not had meet but been verified via cam as at least 1 of us one each nite on chat some how this onli proves we couple then

"

All cam verifications prove is that the person on cam is either male female or a couple it does not prove that you are a genuine meeter or swinger so for that fact i do believe that cam verifications should be withdrawn the same as phone ones

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

so much potential for misuse of such a system.. ie - other members with vendetta toward a particular member could maliciously and inaccurately rate other users who're honest. also meets fall through for a number of different and often legitimate reasons beyond control.

Best to excercise good judgement and avoid those you believe to be "time wasters".

do agree with having minimal ONE public photo though.. too many on here without pics.

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By *r mrs pCouple  over a year ago

taunton


"Wrong, I said people should be photo verified at least!!!

You have been verified by other members which is better than photo verification obviously.

But unless some people actually attend meets with bags over their heads I see no problem with photo verification.

There's guys on here pretending to be women or couples, therefore wasting the time of anyone who has arranged a meet, swapped mails, sent winks or even spent the time to read their fake profiles.

It can only make the website stronger and more reliable and fun to use, if u know that the person your talking to is verified, I think admin even realised this as they removed the option of verify by phone"

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By *ounghornycouple1988Couple  over a year ago

bathgate

So basically we not ready for meeting because we not had already meet but what if like us we arranged several and these havnt happen due to No fault of own ?????

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"So basically we not ready for meeting because we not had already meet but what if like us we arranged several and these havnt happen due to No fault of own ?????"

pklease dont take my post personally, its basically a general response..I've been here about 5years, and in general...from a camchatroom wise angle...everything looks great on camera, the fun u can have is great...but when it gets down to off-cam fun as in meeting the vast majority(single males being the highest offenders lol-thats just maths though)fail to 'cum' through with the goods.

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By *ugby 123Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

Use your gut instinct to filter out your meets whichever way you see fit, and you probably won't go far wrong

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Use your gut instinct to filter out your meets whichever way you see fit, and you probably won't go far wrong "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

timewaisters money spends just like genuine peoples money - major flaw

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"if your sick of rude people / time wasters then really you need to look at your selection process

no ones going to have a timewaster stamp on their profile,

but you can certintally raise your standards to meet which should help cut it down, if you want someone to have a timewaster mark, then why dont you set your own criteria of what you need to avoid them

maybe a set number of verifications, public photos, other stuff like this, after all you want a profile to have a timewaster mark, that wont stop you getting people wasting your time, as even with this system you would have new people wasting your time too!

so why not look at verifications etc, you decide the criteria, but for example you could be like: ok they have ten verifications, they have passed my timewaster test and i'll message them/reply

"

However, how does one get past being labelled as one if they are a parent and the guy they are exchanging messages with is thinking with his cock and not what is between his ears? Or the couple who cannot manage to text that they are on their way to meet you and find they are waiting a long time in a pub for you? (I have had too many wasted journeys to meet someone only to find they are not there so I expect someone to text me when they are on their way; if I don't get a text, I assume they are not coming so I don't leave my house)

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