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Friendship 1st, sex later?
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By (user no longer on site) OP 28 weeks ago
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Anyone else feel the same? Building a rapport with an emphasis more on friendship, especially as benefits are so much nicer (in our opinion) with people we know and like. |
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I'm conflicted because people I wouldn't gel with have said this site isn't for that.
(this site is what you make it I think but anyway)
I don't feel sexual attraction to someone I'm nervious of.
Someone I don't know enough to have established a normal.
I don't get off on the fear/excitment of what a stranger might do.
I think it means Demi or Asexual spectrum for me.
To experiance the highs of amazing sex I want to feel safe in the lull prior, in between and afterwards. Be able to feel at ease with the person. Not feel like a performing sex worker who's on a time limit 😂 |
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"Good to know we’re not alone. We had the same guy for 20+ years for MMF fun but it started and continued as a great friendship"
Sounds like the ideal on here for many couples I think.
Awesome to hear such arrangements and friendships do happen 😁 |
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By (user no longer on site) 28 weeks ago
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100% agree with this. I personally, couldn’t have sex with someone I don’t have a friendship with.
If I can’t laugh and joke with them, I want nothing to do with seeing them naked
Char |
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"There is a danger that the longer you take to become friends the less likely that sex will happen but in general I used to like to meet someone socially a couple of times "
Is that a danger or is that choosing your play partners to be suited to who you are, who they are and the experiences you want to share? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 28 weeks ago
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It seems we are not on our own. There are other men, women and couples who feel the same. In our book, building a closer relationship is so much nicer and truly intimate than just sex for the sake of instant gratification. Why not look forward to seeing people you know well, enjoy their company and look forward to taking to bed? Why not develop an emotional bond with people you genuinely care about? It’s not a danger that you won’t have sex. It’s just respect. |
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A sexually encounter is a mutual partnership. Where you are working together to ensure you are both experiencing pleasure. There is a scientific reason why sex is better with friendship. It's due to the neurotransmitters in your brain. An orgasm produces dopamine. Which is a quick hit, like a sugar rush.
Satisfaction though, which is gained through friendship, releases oxytocine, which is related more to live. And it's like a slow burn high.
I only know this due to the ADHD rabbit hole I go down about my own condition. I am starved of dopamine and crave dopamine highs. |
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