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New-ish. Profile improvements? Too blunt?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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As it says on the tin really. Should I be trying to 'sell myself' more in a roundabout way or is honesty the best policy on here since I get the odd 'w**ker' message from people I say no thanks to? Be brutal, I can handle it  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I only put that in because people were asking the same things all the time and it was stuff that was already answered in what I'd wrote. Worth removing then? |
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I don't think you should put anything in because other people do. If its valuable for you to put it in, then do so; otherwise, why bother. Your profile should reflect the uniqueness of you, surely? |
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It's very negative in many aspects. It even starts off with a negative. It implies that loads of people are reLly really keen to see more photos of you, but from the cock pics I can see, it would be stretching the limits of my cynicism to suggest otherwise. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I suppose so yeah. I never looked at it like that, maybe I should have. I think the replying to the same messages over and over got the better of me and I saw that as a possible way of avoiding them. Obviously it hasn't worked since only two people have used the word and everyone else has ignored it lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I just made a comment on another post re 'code words' as I find them unnecessary, especially if it's towards the end of the profile... It also doesn't mean people have read it, they may have read the first and last bit... Which is what I did so not always a good indicator |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's very negative in many aspects. It even starts off with a negative. It implies that loads of people are reLly really keen to see more photos of you, but from the cock pics I can see, it would be stretching the limits of my cynicism to suggest otherwise. "
This is what I needed, some brutal honesty! I don't want to come across as negative or anything like that because that couldn't be further from who I really am. I could do with someone else writing my profile really lol |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I just made a comment on another post re 'code words' as I find them unnecessary, especially if it's towards the end of the profile... It also doesn't mean people have read it, they may have read the first and last bit... Which is what I did so not always a good indicator "
I'm gonna have to remove the code word thing, it's never actually helped (well it did twice) and it's getting me a right hammering now thanks though, help is always appreciated |
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"It's very negative in many aspects. It even starts off with a negative. It implies that loads of people are reLly really keen to see more photos of you, but from the cock pics I can see, it would be stretching the limits of my cynicism to suggest otherwise.
This is what I needed, some brutal honesty! I don't want to come across as negative or anything like that because that couldn't be further from who I really am. I could do with someone else writing my profile really lol"
You have a good attitude, just reply this to the loser men who contact you "thank you for your message. It has not been deemed interesting enough to warrant a reply" then block.
Just make it all positive.  show what a happy pleasant guy you are. And lose the code word, although believe me it's grand having a message with the title "I'm in awe of your cock" when that's your code...phrase  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Ahahhahaaaa! There's no more code words from me now, I've changed it and decided to give advice in that bit now  I tried with the humour and sarcasm but that went down like my ex in a Turkish barbers so I changed it all to stop getting abused. I can't win lol |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Just be yourself and join in on the forums chatrooms socials and clubs. Go to the lounge right now and join in. "
The socials seem like a good idea until I remember half the people that go to the one that's local to me have sent the shitty messages to me and I can just see myself being on the wrong end of a glass bottle or someone's nails, and my face just isn't made for that kind of punishment. I'll have to just start speaking to people off my own back instead of just the people who message me first and see where it goes. Hopefully I'll find some decent people that way |
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"Just be yourself and join in on the forums chatrooms socials and clubs. Go to the lounge right now and join in.
The socials seem like a good idea until I remember half the people that go to the one that's local to me have sent the shitty messages to me and I can just see myself being on the wrong end of a glass bottle or someone's nails, and my face just isn't made for that kind of punishment. I'll have to just start speaking to people off my own back instead of just the people who message me first and see where it goes. Hopefully I'll find some decent people that way "
Honestly, at socials people wont remember if they have sent you a message or not. Only a very few people on the forums remember who has written what and I would suspect if there were a few messages that went nowhere flying between and you or they come across differently in real life, then the messages or posts on threads would be the furthest thing from anyone's head. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"think you need to decide where you live, York or Hull
be good to say why you can not accommodate as well"
Good point, I'm in a little village between the two so I just put that. I'll address the accommodate part now lol |
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I can see you have made the changes, but I think you have gone too far giving people information about your son ... I know plenty of people who have kids at home, but don't have to advertise the fact on their profile. There are still some hidden assumptions that could be seen as negative ... and a dig at others, quality versus quantity and married men .... I didn't see the negativity in your profile as it was, until someone pointed it out. I would say now, just leave it and let it be ... in my opinion you can't write your profile for everyone else because you aren't going to please everyone. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I can see you have made the changes, but I think you have gone too far giving people information about your son ... I know plenty of people who have kids at home, but don't have to advertise the fact on their profile. There are still some hidden assumptions that could be seen as negative ... and a dig at others, quality versus quantity and married men .... I didn't see the negativity in your profile as it was, until someone pointed it out. I would say now, just leave it and let it be ... in my opinion you can't write your profile for everyone else because you aren't going to please everyone. "
I put the reasoning behind why I couldn't accommodate, if I'd of put "can't accommodate due to family reasons" people would assume I'm a cheat since my profile states I'm single. It would look dodgy, unless I'm just a suspicious person but thanks for the help/advice, if people don't like it or make a judgement on me from what I've wrote then that's their choice and I'm cool with that |
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"I can see you have made the changes, but I think you have gone too far giving people information about your son ... I know plenty of people who have kids at home, but don't have to advertise the fact on their profile. There are still some hidden assumptions that could be seen as negative ... and a dig at others, quality versus quantity and married men .... I didn't see the negativity in your profile as it was, until someone pointed it out. I would say now, just leave it and let it be ... in my opinion you can't write your profile for everyone else because you aren't going to please everyone.
I put the reasoning behind why I couldn't accommodate, if I'd of put "can't accommodate due to family reasons" people would assume I'm a cheat since my profile states I'm single. It would look dodgy, unless I'm just a suspicious person but thanks for the help/advice, if people don't like it or make a judgement on me from what I've wrote then that's their choice and I'm cool with that "
I think lots of single females and couples don't accommodate for the same reasons lots of men don't. Children. I just dont like it that men have to explain themselves. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I can see you have made the changes, but I think you have gone too far giving people information about your son ... I know plenty of people who have kids at home, but don't have to advertise the fact on their profile. There are still some hidden assumptions that could be seen as negative ... and a dig at others, quality versus quantity and married men .... I didn't see the negativity in your profile as it was, until someone pointed it out. I would say now, just leave it and let it be ... in my opinion you can't write your profile for everyone else because you aren't going to please everyone.
I put the reasoning behind why I couldn't accommodate, if I'd of put "can't accommodate due to family reasons" people would assume I'm a cheat since my profile states I'm single. It would look dodgy, unless I'm just a suspicious person but thanks for the help/advice, if people don't like it or make a judgement on me from what I've wrote then that's their choice and I'm cool with that
I think lots of single females and couples don't accommodate for the same reasons lots of men don't. Children. I just dont like it that men have to explain themselves. "
I know what you mean, I was thinking it as I wrote it but I'd rather put the truth out there than have people assuming I'm not who I say I am. It is only a male thing though, funny how we have to explain ourselves even though I've had plenty of women messaging me on here openly admitting they're cheating on their fellas but nobody questions why theirs says can't accommodate  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I put the reasoning behind why I couldn't accommodate, if I'd of put "can't accommodate due to family reasons" people would assume I'm a cheat since my profile states I'm single. It would look dodgy, unless I'm just a suspicious person but thanks for the help/advice, if people don't like it or make a judgement on me from what I've wrote then that's their choice and I'm cool with that
I think lots of single females and couples don't accommodate for the same reasons lots of men don't. Children. I just dont like it that men have to explain themselves. "
From my point of view I only meet guys who can accommodate, any first play meet would be at there's, far too many who say they can accom, but are married and hope that i will just meet at my place, as the OP says his son is only mostly there, he can accomm, but choses for what ever reason not too |
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"I put the reasoning behind why I couldn't accommodate, if I'd of put "can't accommodate due to family reasons" people would assume I'm a cheat since my profile states I'm single. It would look dodgy, unless I'm just a suspicious person but thanks for the help/advice, if people don't like it or make a judgement on me from what I've wrote then that's their choice and I'm cool with that
I think lots of single females and couples don't accommodate for the same reasons lots of men don't. Children. I just dont like it that men have to explain themselves.
From my point of view I only meet guys who can accommodate, any first play meet would be at there's, far too many who say they can accom, but are married and hope that i will just meet at my place, as the OP says his son is only mostly there, he can accomm, but choses for what ever reason not too"
I think that is fair enough from anyone who can and does accommodate, but perhaps some men want to keep their fab life separate from their real life, just like some women and couples do. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I put the reasoning behind why I couldn't accommodate, if I'd of put "can't accommodate due to family reasons" people would assume I'm a cheat since my profile states I'm single. It would look dodgy, unless I'm just a suspicious person but thanks for the help/advice, if people don't like it or make a judgement on me from what I've wrote then that's their choice and I'm cool with that
I think lots of single females and couples don't accommodate for the same reasons lots of men don't. Children. I just dont like it that men have to explain themselves.
From my point of view I only meet guys who can accommodate, any first play meet would be at there's, far too many who say they can accom, but are married and hope that i will just meet at my place, as the OP says his son is only mostly there, he can accomm, but choses for what ever reason not too"
Not sure if there was a dig in there or not to be honest lol. If my boy isn't here then obviously I'd say so to whoever I was speaking to and then my place would be available. I'm not gonna write a timetable on my profile covering my shift patterns and everything else, if my place is child free it'll be fine, if he's here I'm not comfortable with it |
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"I put the reasoning behind why I couldn't accommodate, if I'd of put "can't accommodate due to family reasons" people would assume I'm a cheat since my profile states I'm single. It would look dodgy, unless I'm just a suspicious person but thanks for the help/advice, if people don't like it or make a judgement on me from what I've wrote then that's their choice and I'm cool with that
I think lots of single females and couples don't accommodate for the same reasons lots of men don't. Children. I just dont like it that men have to explain themselves.
From my point of view I only meet guys who can accommodate, any first play meet would be at there's, far too many who say they can accom, but are married and hope that i will just meet at my place, as the OP says his son is only mostly there, he can accomm, but choses for what ever reason not too
Not sure if there was a dig in there or not to be honest lol. If my boy isn't here then obviously I'd say so to whoever I was speaking to and then my place would be available. I'm not gonna write a timetable on my profile covering my shift patterns and everything else, if my place is child free it'll be fine, if he's here I'm not comfortable with it"
Part of the problem is that you get yourself into having to explain too much if you begin the explain a little. You have the right not to accommodate and not to have to justify it. Perhaps you wouldn't want strangers who you meet for sex around your place because your child goes there sometimes. Who knows if someone you invite round wont randomly turn up another time .... that's why I don't every accommodate. |
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"May I say that to me it comes across as quite a demanding profile with negativity although the lighthearted pictures with lots of smilies i find a too immature. "
Yes, it's now a much different profile from when I commented before..you asked for profile advice and took it.
I like it!
x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"May I say that to me it comes across as quite a demanding profile with negativity although the lighthearted pictures with lots of smilies i find a too immature.
Yes, it's now a much different profile from when I commented before..you asked for profile advice and took it.
I like it!
x"
Thank you, yeah there's no point asking for advice and not taking it or sitting here crying about it (I did consider that one to be honest) so I guess I'll just have to wait and see whether it was worth changing it all for. Hopefully it will reduce the amount of spam I get off people lol  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The comment about the dog costume is remarkably specific.  "
Some of the messages I've recieved have been a lot more specific, and yes a dog costume and acting like a dog have been mentioned. I don't want to read those things again |
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