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When men don’t perform

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

This actually happened with a guy we met . So they have been promising all sorts of things in their messages And what do we hope from the meet and we make the effort to book a hotel and dress up . He arrives and finishes in super quick time and spends an hour or so then talking crap . In my opinion I think he’s now a waste of time And effort and I Wouldn’t bother meeting Him

again , I actually feel cheated because he didn’t live up to his Promises . Madhatter thinks I’m being cruel and guys can’t help it at times .... I think I owe no man that’s on a sex site second chances if they fail to live up to their own promises .

So am I cruel or to be crude if you can’t shit get off the pot

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

did you speak to him about your disappointment before posting it on a public forum?

So many factors can play into how a meet goes...

Think its a bit harsh tbh

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think you're being unfair, nerves can kick in and impact a man's performance, it's fair enough if you don't feel the experience was worth repeating, very harsh to suggest there's some performance standard that men have to meet or be slagged off as a waste of your time.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Suppose it’s always the issue for males here on this site.. I think your being a tad harsh though.. especially on a one off meet.. nerves and all..

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

I should state he’s not here any longer as there’s no way I discuss this if he was on here . We had Been messaging for quite a while on WhatsApp . I didn’t tell him I

Was disappointed , I wouldn’t deliberately knock someone’s confidence but the more I think about it the more I think , that wasn’t much fun

.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Personally I would never meet anyone who was talking himself up sexually before ever playing, reeks of insecurity to me.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

definitely insecurities in men who give it the large one before a meet respect first and the rest will be fine i think?

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By *etfuckxMan  over a year ago

Travel around Ireland continously

If you were not satisfied and you don't want to meet this guy again I don't think that's an issue.

However to be blasting it all over a forum is very in mature and yes crude.

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By *ommando4Man  over a year ago

South Co. Dublin

Go with well verified in future

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By *ealitybitesMan  over a year ago

Belfast

It is a bit harsh but at the same time its one of the reasons I always insist on a social meet beforehand. It tells you nothing about how anyone will perform but gives you a better idea of how nervous they are and their general demeanor.

I've had social meets where the woman bore no resemblance to the sexually confident person messaging me.

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By *oghunter33Woman  over a year ago

on the hill NordWest of

Simple rule: the more they promise the less they deliver = Avoid braggers.

It's utterly frustrating when that happens and although it's harsh there's no second chance with me either.

Luckily the success of my selection process improved remarkably over the years and most of the time it's 'smile guaranteed'.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

But does how a meet plays out not depend on both parties? If it wasn't great is the fault solely his? In hindsight, we've had meets that could have been better but we have a part to play in that too. Whether it's containing the pace or ramping up the content or any other aspect, these things are not outwith our own control.

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By *rishman444Man  over a year ago

letterkenny


"This actually happened with a guy we met . So they have been promising all sorts of things in their messages And what do we hope from the meet and we make the effort to book a hotel and dress up . He arrives and finishes in super quick time and spends an hour or so then talking crap . In my opinion I think he’s now a waste of time And effort and I Wouldn’t bother meeting Him

again , I actually feel cheated because he didn’t live up to his Promises . Madhatter thinks I’m being cruel and guys can’t help it at times .... I think I owe no man that’s on a sex site second chances if they fail to live up to their own promises .

So am I cruel or to be crude if you can’t shit get off the pot "

I get where you're coming from you was promised the stars but got nothing that he said he could do so in future watch out for the men that will blow there load on here about what they can do and I hope you get better meets

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"But does how a meet plays out not depend on both parties? If it wasn't great is the fault solely his? In hindsight, we've had meets that could have been better but we have a part to play in that too. Whether it's containing the pace or ramping up the content or any other aspect, these things are not outwith our own control. "

This is very true also

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By *oghunter33Woman  over a year ago

on the hill NordWest of


"But does how a meet plays out not depend on both parties? If it wasn't great is the fault solely his? In hindsight, we've had meets that could have been better but we have a part to play in that too. Whether it's containing the pace or ramping up the content or any other aspect, these things are not outwith our own control. "

Yes I agree it needs two to tango, but there's little you can when he shoots his ammunition in no time.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple  over a year ago

East / North, Cork

It happens. I wouldn't blame him really. I can understand the frustration and disappointment... but I'm sure he is feeling frustrated and disappointed too.

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By *he English OneMan  over a year ago

west

See this is why I don't say what I will or won't do with someone that way I don't disappoint because of what I said

if someone is quick to cum maybe they should mention it before hand because then you know what pace to go with

But like it's been said maybe engage in more social meets to get the jist of the person like I'm pretty good at typing to people but in reality I can be a shy little feck at times lol but then other times I can click with someone as if I've known them for ages that connection and chemistry is key to all meets but hey what do I know lol

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By *oghunter33Woman  over a year ago

on the hill NordWest of


"It happens. I wouldn't blame him really. I can understand the frustration and disappointment... but I'm sure he is feeling frustrated and disappointed too. "

Ya, not sure about the latter. There's a fair amount who simply don't care as long as they got their dick wet.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It happens. I wouldn't blame him really. I can understand the frustration and disappointment... but I'm sure he is feeling frustrated and disappointed too.

Ya, not sure about the latter. There's a fair amount who simply don't care as long as they got their dick wet. "

They don't tend to stay around for a following hour chatting to be fair

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By *og-ManMan  over a year ago

somewhere

Surely instead of chatting for an hour it would have made more sense to go for round two.

How do women feel about that

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By *hilaboutMan  over a year ago

kilkenny

Always try to discuss likes an turn ons before a meet ..leads to a more relaxed an enjoyable experience then when everyone knows abit more sexually about each other..

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By *rxmrsCouple  over a year ago

Dublin westmeath galway

Maybe u should have given him a second chance probably just a little nervous meeting a couple

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By *ashy85Man  over a year ago

Waterford

What a shit topic hahaha

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Yes it can happen the best of us , but what if the arousal wasn’t there for him like he expected!!!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Surely instead of chatting for an hour it would have made more sense to go for round two.

How do women feel about that "

I like your thinking

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By *hilaboutMan  over a year ago

kilkenny

Shit or not ..it happens ..

.

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By *hris 1000200Man  over a year ago

kells

Can understand about the nerves,excitement,,but to stick around chatting for a hour afterwards.would it not of been better to spend that hour or so in readiness to continue on ,,strange

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By *ustBoWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

He could have just been nervous it happens.

It's also one of the reasons I don't tend to meet guys who are all talk about how they can be the one to satisfy me and how amazing they are in bed etc.

If you don't want to meet him again then don't just tell him you're not interested in a second meet. No need to knock his confidence and say why.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Ok maybe he was nervoues or just think to much in his mind, that is a killer in my opinion.

And yes of course when he say text doing this and this and go for hours you expect somne like this and not the 1min fast exploding and ..after the talking.. I understand you feel waste time etc even because you have a image in your mind. Just breath and tick the box for this experience there way more out there Madhatter

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By *og-ManMan  over a year ago

somewhere

I'll tell ya one thing the next man you meet is one lucky man...I mean he already doesn't have a lot to live up to

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By *easingTimMan  over a year ago

Loughlinstown


"This actually happened with a guy we met . So they have been promising all sorts of things in their messages And what do we hope from the meet and we make the effort to book a hotel and dress up . He arrives and finishes in super quick time and spends an hour or so then talking crap . In my opinion I think he’s now a waste of time And effort and I Wouldn’t bother meeting Him

again , I actually feel cheated because he didn’t live up to his Promises . Madhatter thinks I’m being cruel and guys can’t help it at times .... I think I owe no man that’s on a sex site second chances if they fail to live up to their own promises .

So am I cruel or to be crude if you can’t shit get off the pot "

-------------------

Thing is if the guy says afterwards "That was amazing!" and harps on about how great the sex was, then no second chance, gone, GOOD LUCK!

...BUT If the guy fessed up and said "Listen, that was one of my shorter meets and could have been so much better" then you might say "Okay, we're all allowed one off night once in a while"

...how he talks about the meet afterwards will tell you how the next one will most likely be

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By *orguyMan  over a year ago

Tuam

You should have made him do the hoovering to make up for it

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By *aid backMan  over a year ago

by a lake with my rod out

Being a single guy is pretty tough. There is a lot of pressure on guys to perform etc. A lot of couples don't understand that while you have each other for support the single guy is there alone. Everyone has had a bad day at the office at some point even seasoned swingers.

But saying that single guys should not over sell themselves either. I firmly believe that you should undersell and over deliver.

You said he finished quickly and sat around talking for an hour. Did you try to start playing again ? Maybe he kept talking because he was embarrassed and he didn't want to initiate play because he thought you didn't want to play again. The fact he hung around afterwards says to me he wasn't just a fuck and go type lad.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Sadly have found it difficult to perform occasionally - just feel disappointed that I have left other part/parties down

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It works both ways. Women can also talk the talk about how wet they are, yet I've never been to a party where a bottle of lube wasn't whipped out.

Should fellas also feel cheated that women cannot perform in a party situation? That they need to cheat by adding lube because they cant control their own bodily functions when it comes down to it?

Honestly, I'd say ive seen women not able to get wet enough and needing lube more often than a man not being able to get hard enough.

Obviously it's a stupid comparison, but I'm just pointing out how neither man nor women can control their bodily functions in nervous situations and you shouldn't take it personally.

If however they just didnt bother their arse with everything else that they can control... foreplay etc., then that's a different story.

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By *rmrspumpCouple  over a year ago

narnia

I think it's being unfair, I think girls sometime don't fully appreciate the pressure a guy is under, especially when meeting a couple, as evidenced by the number of guys that don't bother to even turn up! The lad turned up, did his best and wasn't a dick.. He might well have been more relaxed if given a return visit

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By *ommando4Man  over a year ago

South Co. Dublin

All of these problems are easily solved by a double shot of whiskey 20mins before the meet or jerking off 90 mins before. Why do some people not prepare properly for their meets and head off half cocked !

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By *tevecabra7Man  over a year ago

cabra

[Removed by poster at 16/09/20 14:52:16]

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By *tevecabra7Man  over a year ago

cabra


"This actually happened with a guy we met . So they have been promising all sorts of things in their messages And what do we hope from the meet and we make the effort to book a hotel and dress up . He arrives and finishes in super quick time and spends an hour or so then talking crap . In my opinion I think he’s now a waste of time And effort and I Wouldn’t bother meeting Him

again , I actually feel cheated because he didn’t live up to his Promises . Madhatter thinks I’m being cruel and guys can’t help it at times .... I think I owe no man that’s on a sex site second chances if they fail to live up to their own promises .

So am I cruel or to be crude if you can’t shit get off the pot "

99 % of men talk shit just to get into a girls knickers saying I can fuck u for hours make u squirt give u the best lick out ever but in fact the ones who say that just jump on and off and finished in 10 mins me been q man saying that about me wow. But in fact if they just taught about the buzx ya get from pleasing a woman kissing her for agew touching her feeling her the fucking smell of her is just the best so all the big cock talk is bolox personally loads kissing foreplay and the nice long sex pleasing her with ya tongue ur mouth your hanes qnd then when its time to take the hard cock out to give her a nice bit loving is the best so my advice is loads kissing and then the magic will happen. What turns me on is turning the girl on best ever. We be fucked without women x

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By *tevecabra7Man  over a year ago

cabra


"I think it's being unfair, I think girls sometime don't fully appreciate the pressure a guy is under, especially when meeting a couple, as evidenced by the number of guys that don't bother to even turn up! The lad turned up, did his best and wasn't a dick.. He might well have been more o if given a return visit "
is no pressure the minute a guy walks into a room and sees Thqt girl he should get an instant hard on and min he kisses her he should get harder pressure is only for car tyres. X

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By *rmrspumpCouple  over a year ago

narnia


"I think it's being unfair, I think girls sometime don't fully appreciate the pressure a guy is under, especially when meeting a couple, as evidenced by the number of guys that don't bother to even turn up! The lad turned up, did his best and wasn't a dick.. He might well have been more o if given a return visit is no pressure the minute a guy walks into a room and sees Thqt girl he should get an instant hard on and min he kisses her he should get harder pressure is only for car tyres. X"

Snore...

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By *antra MassageMan  over a year ago

Carrick


"But does how a meet plays out not depend on both parties? If it wasn't great is the fault solely his? In hindsight, we've had meets that could have been better but we have a part to play in that too. Whether it's containing the pace or ramping up the content or any other aspect, these things are not outwith our own control. "

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By *ornyfireCouple  over a year ago

Middle Earth

Did he think he lived up to his promises? He hung around chatting for an hour afterwards so doesn't sound like he taught he under preformed or he didn't want to be in their company because Mrs did not live up to his expectations.

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By *antra MassageMan  over a year ago

Carrick

It's crude to air this so publicly.. What the purpose of your post, sharing info or revenge?. It takes two to play,

did you ask him for what you want..?

Did you fancy each other?

Did you ask him to slow down,?

And the hour long conversation after wasn't a monologue, did you tell him how you felt?

I can understand your frustration, and regret,.. Lesson learned. But to humiliate him for his sexual "performance" so publicly.. Nope, not good. I wonder what he thought of your "performance". OK, both of you had high hopes of a great time together, but even with a regular lover there are off days. Forgive him.

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By *nquisitive ladyWoman  over a year ago

meath


"This actually happened with a guy we met . So they have been promising all sorts of things in their messages And what do we hope from the meet and we make the effort to book a hotel and dress up . He arrives and finishes in super quick time and spends an hour or so then talking crap . In my opinion I think he’s now a waste of time And effort and I Wouldn’t bother meeting Him

again , I actually feel cheated because he didn’t live up to his Promises . Madhatter thinks I’m being cruel and guys can’t help it at times .... I think I owe no man that’s on a sex site second chances if they fail to live up to their own promises .

So am I cruel or to be crude if you can’t shit get off the pot "

To be honest I find this to be harsh. Does it not take both parties to make a meet a good experience. After reading this post I'm sure a lot will be a little wary of meeting you now for fear that they will be spoken about in the forums. As you say your partner thinks you're being a cruel. I have to say I agree.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Is no pressure the minute a guy walks into a room and sees Thqt girl he should get an instant hard on and min he kisses her he should get harder pressure is only for car tyres. X"

Of course there's pressure; be it psychosomatic or through expectations.

The Ohpee has by no means inferred this but in general there is often an assumption with sex that it can come down to the needs of the man vs the needs of the woman. Whereas in reality, no matter what your gender, the needs of your sexual partner is something everyone must discuss.

Especially when you consider the pressure that befalls men with the general interpretation of male orgasm; that it's 'final' and signals the culmination of any sexual encounter.

The emphasis on male ejaculation is problematic. As you've described previously, to expect of one person to give pleasure, take pleasure, initiate and finalise sex, can be far too great. Sensuality is fluid and no person's body is a machine; they don’t always behave as we expect or would like to.

Communication and giving your partner an opportunity to express themselves is important rather than expectations dealing with absolutes and grounded in stereotypes.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Is no pressure the minute a guy walks into a room and sees Thqt girl he should get an instant hard on and min he kisses her he should get harder pressure is only for car tyres. X

Of course there's pressure; be it psychosomatic or through expectations.

The Ohpee has by no means inferred this but in general there is often an assumption with sex that it can come down to the needs of the man vs the needs of the woman. Whereas in reality, no matter what your gender, the needs of your sexual partner is something everyone must discuss.

Especially when you consider the pressure that befalls men with the general interpretation of male orgasm; that it's 'final' and signals the culmination of any sexual encounter.

The emphasis on male ejaculation is problematic. As you've described previously, to expect of one person to give pleasure, take pleasure, initiate and finalise sex, can be far too great. Sensuality is fluid and no person's body is a machine; they don’t always behave as we expect or would like to.

Communication and giving your partner an opportunity to express themselves is important rather than expectations dealing with absolutes and grounded in stereotypes. "

You've definitely lived a life before this one.....

Well said.

Lee

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I think it's being unfair, I think girls sometime don't fully appreciate the pressure a guy is under, especially when meeting a couple, as evidenced by the number of guys that don't bother to even turn up! The lad turned up, did his best and wasn't a dick.. He might well have been more o if given a return visit is no pressure the minute a guy walks into a room and sees Thqt girl he should get an instant hard on and min he kisses her he should get harder pressure is only for car tyres. X

Snore... "

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By *hilaboutMan  over a year ago

kilkenny

Yes I'm afraid I wont be meeting you either if this is how you talk about it afterwards

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Is no pressure the minute a guy walks into a room and sees Thqt girl he should get an instant hard on and min he kisses her he should get harder pressure is only for car tyres. X

Of course there's pressure; be it psychosomatic or through expectations.

The Ohpee has by no means inferred this but in general there is often an assumption with sex that it can come down to the needs of the man vs the needs of the woman. Whereas in reality, no matter what your gender, the needs of your sexual partner is something everyone must discuss.

Especially when you consider the pressure that befalls men with the general interpretation of male orgasm; that it's 'final' and signals the culmination of any sexual encounter.

The emphasis on male ejaculation is problematic. As you've described previously, to expect of one person to give pleasure, take pleasure, initiate and finalise sex, can be far too great. Sensuality is fluid and no person's body is a machine; they don’t always behave as we expect or would like to.

Communication and giving your partner an opportunity to express themselves is important rather than expectations dealing with absolutes and grounded in stereotypes. "

Well done, brilliant explaination.

.........................

Its very hard to know what way a person will react to the situation. Maybe in his own mind he thought he could do all the things he mentioned to you, possibly has done it to others before and thought the same would happen with you. You obviously brought him right to the edge of no return and he couldnt help himself .

I have experienced similar to this with others before ( in and out of relatio ships) one night you might only last for 5 mins and cant/dont want to stop yourself from cumming. Next night you might not be able to cum. Different situations brings different results

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By *osmicGateMan  over a year ago

louth


"This actually happened with a guy we met . So they have been promising all sorts of things in their messages And what do we hope from the meet and we make the effort to book a hotel and dress up . He arrives and finishes in super quick time and spends an hour or so then talking crap . In my opinion I think he’s now a waste of time And effort and I Wouldn’t bother meeting Him

again , I actually feel cheated because he didn’t live up to his Promises . Madhatter thinks I’m being cruel and guys can’t help it at times .... I think I owe no man that’s on a sex site second chances if they fail to live up to their own promises .

So am I cruel or to be crude if you can’t shit get off the pot "

Yea I agree he needs to put on a bit of a show not just a few minutes then blow the load.. Any man who does that should be ashamed of himself

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By *omoxfordMan  over a year ago

leeds

It could be down to many things

Was drink involved?

I once did a mfm the photos on the site (not this one), must have been at least ten years old I didn't fancy her in person then when she sucked me whilst being bent over the harder the guy pounded her the more I got her teeth to the point where I had to tell the guy to do it slower

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By *og-ManMan  over a year ago

somewhere

Some really interesting comments on here as to why the man didnt perform to the ops satisfaction.

Some of it straight over my head to be honest but thats fine . I'll read them again later

In the ops favour she did say she wouldnt post it on here if he was still on the site

But what if the guy was just one of those men that would say absolutely anything to get the meet and didnt give a toss whether op was happy or not ...and then left the site ....job done.

Some women seem to have had the same type of experience that have posted in the thread and blocked the men

If the man has left the site...blocking is not an option but venting her frustration is fine isn't it

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Some really interesting comments on here as to why the man didnt perform to the ops satisfaction.

Some of it straight over my head to be honest but thats fine . I'll read them again later

In the ops favour she did say she wouldnt post it on here if he was still on the site

But what if the guy was just one of those men that would say absolutely anything to get the meet and didnt give a toss whether op was happy or not ...and then left the site ....job done.

Some women seem to have had the same type of experience that have posted in the thread and blocked the men

If the man has left the site...blocking is not an option but venting her frustration is fine isn't it

"

Firstly people leave and come back all the time.

Also the OP said he stayed for an hour talking after does that sound like the usual fuck and go MO?

Besides you can vent without giving so many specifics that the person will be pretty sure it's them in the scenario

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By *ealitybitesMan  over a year ago

Belfast


"Some really interesting comments on here as to why the man didnt perform to the ops satisfaction.

Some of it straight over my head to be honest but thats fine . I'll read them again later

In the ops favour she did say she wouldnt post it on here if he was still on the site

But what if the guy was just one of those men that would say absolutely anything to get the meet and didnt give a toss whether op was happy or not ...and then left the site ....job done.

Some women seem to have had the same type of experience that have posted in the thread and blocked the men

If the man has left the site...blocking is not an option but venting her frustration is fine isn't it

"

Sorry BM but can't agree with you on this.

On any meet regardless if it's a one on one situation or a threesome there shouldn't be any pressure on one person alone to perform.

If it's truly to be a mutual experience then the same onus is on everyone to make an effort.

As others have already said, the fact he didn't get up and leave immediately after shows he wasn't there just for his own pleasure regardless of whether the conversation was crap or not.

Frustration is one thing but better communication before during and after can make an enormous difference.

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By *ustBoWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down


"Some really interesting comments on here as to why the man didnt perform to the ops satisfaction.

Some of it straight over my head to be honest but thats fine . I'll read them again later

In the ops favour she did say she wouldnt post it on here if he was still on the site

But what if the guy was just one of those men that would say absolutely anything to get the meet and didnt give a toss whether op was happy or not ...and then left the site ....job done.

Some women seem to have had the same type of experience that have posted in the thread and blocked the men

If the man has left the site...blocking is not an option but venting her frustration is fine isn't it

"

But if he just wanted a shag and didn't care he wouldn't have stayed around and chatted after he would have fucked and gone without hanging around.

Why vent it happens sometimes.

You cannot expect mind blowing sex all the time. And it takes two to tango to be fair.

I wonder if a guy wrote the same thing the reaction he would get. Bet he'd have gotten his ass handed to him on a plate.

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By *nquisitive ladyWoman  over a year ago

meath


"Some really interesting comments on here as to why the man didnt perform to the ops satisfaction.

Some of it straight over my head to be honest but thats fine . I'll read them again later

In the ops favour she did say she wouldnt post it on here if he was still on the site

But what if the guy was just one of those men that would say absolutely anything to get the meet and didnt give a toss whether op was happy or not ...and then left the site ....job done.

Some women seem to have had the same type of experience that have posted in the thread and blocked the men

If the man has left the site...blocking is not an option but venting her frustration is fine isn't it

But if he just wanted a shag and didn't care he wouldn't have stayed around and chatted after he would have fucked and gone without hanging around.

Why vent it happens sometimes.

You cannot expect mind blowing sex all the time. And it takes two to tango to be fair.

I wonder if a guy wrote the same thing the reaction he would get. Bet he'd have gotten his ass handed to him on a plate."

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By *ed just RedWoman  over a year ago

Dublin City

Wow. Classy. I hope he doesn’t come back on here under a different name.

Imagine if a man said this about a woman? Or even a woman was this rude about a man? They’d be savaged. The self-perceived hierarchy of couples on here stinks.

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By *ickheadcuntCouple  over a year ago

Cork Ireland

We all have off days to be fair

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By *rmrspumpCouple  over a year ago

narnia

Have you considered that the hours of shite small talk was him waiting for round 2..? We've had meets were round one lasts a few minutes, and then the meet continued for 3 or 4 very fun hours

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

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By *og-ManMan  over a year ago

somewhere


" "

I take it that it wasnt you

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

I take it that it wasnt you "

I don't think so

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By *ugs BunnyCouple  over a year ago

south Dublin


"This actually happened with a guy we met . So they have been promising all sorts of things in their messages And what do we hope from the meet and we make the effort to book a hotel and dress up . He arrives and finishes in super quick time and spends an hour or so then talking crap . In my opinion I think he’s now a waste of time And effort and I Wouldn’t bother meeting Him

again , I actually feel cheated because he didn’t live up to his Promises . Madhatter thinks I’m being cruel and guys can’t help it at times .... I think I owe no man that’s on a sex site second chances if they fail to live up to their own promises .

So am I cruel or to be crude if you can’t shit get off the pot "

Before a meet we like to do an expectations check i.e. make sure we don't have any. That way when meets do go well it's really amazing rather than being disappointed when things don't go as expected. You feel cheated out of a good time because you were expecting so much after all the promises he made. If you have no expectations you would be happy out with a night in a hotel, dressed up, with your partner rather than feeling cheated out of good sex with a stranger. I reckon it is best to take promises with a massive pinch of salt and keep expectation real low. That's not to say you should give him a second chance, put it down to experience, learn from it and move on to the next where hopefully you'll have better luck. Xxx Mrs Bugs

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By *-4pleasureCouple  over a year ago

Belfast


"Personally I would never meet anyone who was talking himself up sexually before ever playing, reeks of insecurity to me."

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By *omoxfordMan  over a year ago

leeds

On the other hand from a female point of view how long should a guy last

An how long is too long

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By *oejoxxxMan  over a year ago

anywhere

Really good response Mrs Bugs. High expectations can be a bit of a let down. Nothing worse the setting the bar to high.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Wow. Classy. I hope he doesn’t come back on here under a different name.

Imagine if a man said this about a woman? Or even a woman was this rude about a man? They’d be savaged. The self-perceived hierarchy of couples on here stinks."

Hit the nail on the head.

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By *onny17Man  over a year ago

irishtown


"This actually happened with a guy we met . So they have been promising all sorts of things in their messages And what do we hope from the meet and we make the effort to book a hotel and dress up . He arrives and finishes in super quick time and spends an hour or so then talking crap . In my opinion I think he’s now a waste of time And effort and I Wouldn’t bother meeting Him

again , I actually feel cheated because he didn’t live up to his Promises . Madhatter thinks I’m being cruel and guys can’t help it at times .... I think I owe no man that’s on a sex site second chances if they fail to live up to their own promises .

So am I cruel or to be crude if you can’t shit get off the pot "

Not really in agreement with this on any level. I myself can hold my hands up and say my first fab meet went a similar way nerves got the better of me and I finished fairly quick.

To this day im still embarrassed about it so much planning goes into meets and i respect the time it takes to set up however I would say that I'd be hurt to think someone would go onto a forum to have a go at me over a meet that didn't satisfy them. If we all worked like robots nobody would ever buy toys. Happy fabbing

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"This actually happened with a guy we met . So they have been promising all sorts of things in their messages And what do we hope from the meet and we make the effort to book a hotel and dress up . He arrives and finishes in super quick time and spends an hour or so then talking crap . In my opinion I think he’s now a waste of time And effort and I Wouldn’t bother meeting Him

again , I actually feel cheated because he didn’t live up to his Promises . Madhatter thinks I’m being cruel and guys can’t help it at times .... I think I owe no man that’s on a sex site second chances if they fail to live up to their own promises .

So am I cruel or to be crude if you can’t shit get off the pot "

Love to no more and not let ya down

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"This actually happened with a guy we met . So they have been promising all sorts of things in their messages And what do we hope from the meet and we make the effort to book a hotel and dress up . He arrives and finishes in super quick time and spends an hour or so then talking crap . In my opinion I think he’s now a waste of time And effort and I Wouldn’t bother meeting Him

again , I actually feel cheated because he didn’t live up to his Promises . Madhatter thinks I’m being cruel and guys can’t help it at times .... I think I owe no man that’s on a sex site second chances if they fail to live up to their own promises .

So am I cruel or to be crude if you can’t shit get off the pot "

I would say you basic attitude about male performance is not great and might need some education. It's the equivalent to giving out to a woman for not cumming.

But that guy is either an idiot or useless. If you cum quick that is fine. But for me and I think it should be the answer to it always...take a min or 5...but continue and go down on your partner make her cum two or 3 times until you are ready to go. If you can get ready again go talk to Doc Shwarts and get some dick pills. If you take the time out and spend money on a hotel yeah...it must be disappointing to have that lad just sitting there chatting away.

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By *ornyxbbwCouple  over a year ago

Monaghan

I remember my (Steve) first meet with a couple, it was years ago and on another site, I was as nervous as hell, we chatted for awhile it was like a job interview,then the female gave the thumbs up and we moved into the bedroom, when I went for a kiss I was pushed away and told we don’t do that, ok, pity they hadn’t told me first, then the female nearly needed the heimlich maneuver trying to put the condom on with her mouth, with all that I started to go soft lol she sat on the edge of the bed looking up at me with a wtf expression. Got the wee man awake and we started to enjoy ourselves when I noticed the husband recording the action on a camcorder which completely put me off stroke, it was a complete disaster. Since then I communicate better about wants, likes and dislikes before a meet

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Speak low, speak slow and don't ever say anything you don't mean.

Pity that it was a disappointment of a meeting but some guys are just so fulla shite.

Stagefright and nerves are a bollix sometimes, which is why instead of chatting rubbish he should have been putting his tongue to good use..... just saying

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Shiver me timbers

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I've met all sorts and some couples can be as bad. I remember years ago sitting in this couple's living room listening to the wife prattle on about how crap her life was for almost 3 hours. Husband juts fell asleep. Then she suddenly whips her knickers off and says I'd better be quick because we'd run out of time and her son would be home from football practice. Quick one from behind and I was shoved out the door. Didn't go back in spite of being asked a few times lol.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Take note for future reference

"Those who talk about it the most, get it the least"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"This actually happened with a guy we met . So they have been promising all sorts of things in their messages And what do we hope from the meet and we make the effort to book a hotel and dress up . He arrives and finishes in super quick time and spends an hour or so then talking crap . In my opinion I think he’s now a waste of time And effort and I Wouldn’t bother meeting Him

again , I actually feel cheated because he didn’t live up to his Promises . Madhatter thinks I’m being cruel and guys can’t help it at times .... I think I owe no man that’s on a sex site second chances if they fail to live up to their own promises .

So am I cruel or to be crude if you can’t shit get off the pot "

Thing here is he was promising all kinds of things in his messages ..and tbh ..even in everyday life ,work ..sport ..whatever ..you're always gonna meet those that talk the talk but when it arrives..can't walk the walk ..like lets be honest here ..how many people here know people in their own personal lives that love the sound of their own voice and think they're the best thing since the slice pan ,the world is full of them ...you see ..the bottom line here is ,what some people would think is great sex is may be only crap to others..like the guy that says he'd love to meet a lady who loves to fuck ..until he meets a lady that loves to fuck ....but just getting back to the OP's point ,..the guy didn't seem to mind that twas over like that if he then started to talk crap for an hour..as you said OP he was all promises to you ..his words .... so you put your trust in him and the result wasn't what you'd hoped twould be...wether you'd meet him again would be totally up to yourself but as l've always said ..it's ladies that have the final decision if they meet/play or not this jungle..l just hope it wouldn't put you off having fun the way you want to have it or dilute your interest in it .

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"This actually happened with a guy we met . So they have been promising all sorts of things in their messages And what do we hope from the meet and we make the effort to book a hotel and dress up . He arrives and finishes in super quick time and spends an hour or so then talking crap . In my opinion I think he’s now a waste of time And effort and I Wouldn’t bother meeting Him

again , I actually feel cheated because he didn’t live up to his Promises . Madhatter thinks I’m being cruel and guys can’t help it at times .... I think I owe no man that’s on a sex site second chances if they fail to live up to their own promises .

So am I cruel or to be crude if you can’t shit get off the pot "

Fucker wants ‘putting down’ you were kind to him and he was disingenuous

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By *oserMan  over a year ago

where the wild roses grow


"This actually happened with a guy we met . So they have been promising all sorts of things in their messages And what do we hope from the meet and we make the effort to book a hotel and dress up . He arrives and finishes in super quick time and spends an hour or so then talking crap . In my opinion I think he’s now a waste of time And effort and I Wouldn’t bother meeting Him

again , I actually feel cheated because he didn’t live up to his Promises . Madhatter thinks I’m being cruel and guys can’t help it at times .... I think I owe no man that’s on a sex site second chances if they fail to live up to their own promises .

So am I cruel or to be crude if you can’t shit get off the pot

Fucker wants ‘putting down’ you were kind to him and he was disingenuous "

I weep

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"did you speak to him about your disappointment before posting it on a public forum?

So many factors can play into how a meet goes...

Think its a bit harsh tbh"

Oh the politically correct angle, how laudable; no wonder an uncaring, selfish and it has to be said, totally honest and real but of stray DNA is dominating and threatening ever aspect of society right now

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By *j47Man  over a year ago

limerick

How about i tell u i have a small dick look hideous and am probably the worst ride ull ever have

With that as a starting point it can only improve

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By *j47Man  over a year ago

limerick


"Simple rule: the more they promise the less they deliver = Avoid braggers.

It's utterly frustrating when that happens and although it's harsh there's no second chance with me either.

Luckily the success of my selection process improved remarkably over the years and most of the time it's 'smile guaranteed'."

Only a smile

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It happens - could stand here and say oh my God what a loser bla blah blah but it’s happened to us all and any man who says otherwise is full of shit - can get excited and just not control

It but if On a site like this and into all sorts

Of kinky sex which most are, surely In that instance you’re gonna regroup and be back for round two In 5 mins no?!

I mean your in a room specifically for hot sex-all dressed up - sexy woman stockings the works - obviously you go again and that won’t last a short while....nor for the matter will round 3, 4 or 5.....did he just fuck for a minute, talk for an hour and piss off?! That’s bizarre now

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By *he James gangCouple  over a year ago

NEWTOWNABBEY


"This actually happened with a guy we met . So they have been promising all sorts of things in their messages And what do we hope from the meet and we make the effort to book a hotel and dress up . He arrives and finishes in super quick time and spends an hour or so then talking crap . In my opinion I think he’s now a waste of time And effort and I Wouldn’t bother meeting Him

again , I actually feel cheated because he didn’t live up to his Promises . Madhatter thinks I’m being cruel and guys can’t help it at times .... I think I owe no man that’s on a sex site second chances if they fail to live up to their own promises .

So am I cruel or to be crude if you can’t shit get off the pot

Fucker wants ‘putting down’ you were kind to him and he was disingenuous

I weep"

Me too. When we meet with others their desires are as important as our’s. I honestly don’t understand how couples can treat the men who join then as breathing sex toys. I honestly think that attitude and sense of entitlement never works x Jessy

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"This actually happened with a guy we met . So they have been promising all sorts of things in their messages And what do we hope from the meet and we make the effort to book a hotel and dress up . He arrives and finishes in super quick time and spends an hour or so then talking crap . In my opinion I think he’s now a waste of time And effort and I Wouldn’t bother meeting Him

again , I actually feel cheated because he didn’t live up to his Promises . Madhatter thinks I’m being cruel and guys can’t help it at times .... I think I owe no man that’s on a sex site second chances if they fail to live up to their own promises .

So am I cruel or to be crude if you can’t shit get off the pot "

You should first talked with this guy. It was probably nerves and thats why he disappointed you.

It happens.

Few people are right in this thread: talk and judge then not opposite.

It could be any reason he didn't satisfy you.

I am sorry but what you have done in public instead of talking in private is unacceptable.

I hope you learnt lesson and gown up. Its not about you This guy is a living creature not a sex toy.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"This actually happened with a guy we met . So they have been promising all sorts of things in their messages And what do we hope from the meet and we make the effort to book a hotel and dress up . He arrives and finishes in super quick time and spends an hour or so then talking crap . In my opinion I think he’s now a waste of time And effort and I Wouldn’t bother meeting Him

again , I actually feel cheated because he didn’t live up to his Promises . Madhatter thinks I’m being cruel and guys can’t help it at times .... I think I owe no man that’s on a sex site second chances if they fail to live up to their own promises .

So am I cruel or to be crude if you can’t shit get off the pot

You should first talked with this guy. It was probably nerves and thats why he disappointed you.

It happens.

Few people are right in this thread: talk and judge then not opposite.

It could be any reason he didn't satisfy you.

I am sorry but what you have done in public instead of talking in private is unacceptable.

I hope you learnt lesson and gown up. Its not about you This guy is a living creature not a sex toy.

"

Well...to a certain degree it is about her ..the meet was arranged ,hotel booked and on all his promises,( l would say it wasn't this guys first meet ) ,the lady gave the permission for the go ahead of the meet probably based on the promises of the guys sexual ability ,she wanted to be sexually satisfied ,the guy promised it would happen ..it didn't...but regardless of anything ,in my humble opinion ,if a lady gives the go ahead for a meet it's because she wants it ,she wants to be sexually satisfied which to me means in her point of view and in her opinion the meet is for her satisfaction first and foremost which to me means the meet is about her ..,the guy gets his own satisfaction from her being satisfied by him .

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By *ugby 123Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo


"This actually happened with a guy we met . So they have been promising all sorts of things in their messages And what do we hope from the meet and we make the effort to book a hotel and dress up . He arrives and finishes in super quick time and spends an hour or so then talking crap . In my opinion I think he’s now a waste of time And effort and I Wouldn’t bother meeting Him

again , I actually feel cheated because he didn’t live up to his Promises . Madhatter thinks I’m being cruel and guys can’t help it at times .... I think I owe no man that’s on a sex site second chances if they fail to live up to their own promises .

So am I cruel or to be crude if you can’t shit get off the pot

Fucker wants ‘putting down’ you were kind to him and he was disingenuous "

Blimey, I hope that is sarcasm

To the quoted post, pressure to perform sometimes means men can't. When we had this we just stopped, had a chat about anything and everything until the man had relaxed enough for us to play, we then had a great meet.

Maybe a bit of mutual respect on a meet should be applied

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"did you speak to him about your disappointment before posting it on a public forum?

So many factors can play into how a meet goes...

Think its a bit harsh tbh"

This

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By *oghunter33Woman  over a year ago

on the hill NordWest of


"Simple rule: the more they promise the less they deliver = Avoid braggers.

It's utterly frustrating when that happens and although it's harsh there's no second chance with me either.

Luckily the success of my selection process improved remarkably over the years and most of the time it's 'smile guaranteed'.

Only a smile "

A week long lasting one.

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By *undubguy100Man  over a year ago

Dublin

Maybe.....just maybe....you didnt live up to expectations and he wanted it over and done with..very harsh on the poor guy...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"This actually happened with a guy we met . So they have been promising all sorts of things in their messages And what do we hope from the meet and we make the effort to book a hotel and dress up . He arrives and finishes in super quick time and spends an hour or so then talking crap . In my opinion I think he’s now a waste of time And effort and I Wouldn’t bother meeting Him

again , I actually feel cheated because he didn’t live up to his Promises . Madhatter thinks I’m being cruel and guys can’t help it at times .... I think I owe no man that’s on a sex site second chances if they fail to live up to their own promises .

So am I cruel or to be crude if you can’t shit get off the pot "

I dont think ur cruel.if a guy is bragging and promising what he can do and dosent do half of it.

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By *ontbesillywrapyourwillyMan  over a year ago

Tipperary

I'm happy to get my willy wet in the right vagina.

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