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High sex drive low self esteem.

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By *umpingJackFlash OP   Man  over a year ago

Anywhere

Just a topic for discussion really.

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By *ealitybitesMan  over a year ago

Belfast

I can relate to the low self esteem as that was my state of mind for the best part of 30 years until I was nearly 50 so in my case there was no quick fix. It took a number of things to trigger a change but those were personal to me and won't apply to anyone else.

I can't relate to the high sex drive as I've never had one so I can't advise on the link between the two things.

However based on similar threads and advice from others, you can't rely on this site and the people in it to improve your self esteem. It has helped some obviously but everyone is unique so what works for one might not work for others.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It's not ideal to connect your self-esteem to the willingness of people to have sex with you.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I can relate to what OP is saying. When I divorced my self esteem and sex drive were very low. Took a good year for me to get back to where I wanted to be.

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By *ustBoWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

I think that sometimes when other things take over in your life your sex drive tends to lessen .I know it does with me I enjoy sex always have but I went years without any and it was only after a friend suggested this site that I found my drive again as such. Good sex makes me want more but it's not essential to my day to day life I can easily function without it as well if it's not happening .And there are always toys that help anyhow even tho I would pick real sex over them any day.

I've always had pretty low esteem tho even when looking back I shouldn't have had really.But that is a work in progress now and something that has been improving in recent years.

This site of you pay too much heed to it can make or break your esteem and even when it builds you up people normally end up crashing back down at some point I've seen it happen so many times with people on here.. It's why I take here with a pinch of salt and don't let it affect me either way .

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By *onjuan234Man  over a year ago

Limerick

Yes a break up leaves you questioning yourself, what did I do wrong or why did they leave? It leaves self esteem st a very low point but what worked for me after feeling sorry for myself just hit the gym and concentrated looking after myself and this got me back to my old self.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple  over a year ago

East / North, Cork


"It's not ideal to connect your self-esteem to the willingness of people to have sex with you. "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Work on your self - esteem. Its critical for you.

How you do it? Everyone comes at it differently, the gym seems to work for a lot of people,

I took personal development courses, worked on other skills I enjoyed, and *so corny* used positive affirmations and power poses lol!

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By *upermanslovechildMan  over a year ago

Glasnevin

I find working out usually helps for both, I have low self esteem due to my current body type the last few years and if my sex drive ever dips slightly I find after a workout it's back up high again. Could just be from the testosterone pumping.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Work on your self - esteem. Its critical for you.

How you do it? Everyone comes at it differently, the gym seems to work for a lot of people,

I took personal development courses, worked on other skills I enjoyed, and *so corny* used positive affirmations and power poses lol!

"

Self esteem and respect for one’s self is critical, as the mind becomes more positive, we have a better ability to enjoy what is in our lives,

That can be family, work and relationships, sexual or otherwise.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I can relate to this post. My sex drive, up to a few months ago, was very high. All consuming. Probably the reason I logged back in here. My self esteem was brutal and I was suffering from severe discontentment. I was put on new meds for anxiety to help with my insomnia and my head has definitely settled. I’m sleeping better, but find it harder to workout. I feel it’s taken an edge of me but I probably needed that.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I had very low self esteem and zero sex drive when I separated from my husband. After having kids I was so insecure about my body I avoided meeting people never went out and hated meeting new people. I would go months without sex. So I actually have Fab to thank for my now healthy sex drive and my confidence. I had to push myself to go to parties or even a coffee meet as I was so nervous that people wouldn't like me. But eventually it gets easier and now I can walk into any room be it for a fab meet or a job interview and hold my head up high and not be nervous. If people like me great but if they don't I'm OK with that too

I also did a boudoir shoot which changed my life. I really didn't like what I saw in the mirror but after seeing the photos I embraced my imperfections and learnt to love what I see not one person is perfect so we shouldn't obsess about it. I still have those same lumps and wobbly bits but I don't see them anymore. I used to get horrible messages calling me fat or flabby and be so hurt and insecure but now I just feel sorry for the person.

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By *oghunter33Woman  over a year ago

on the hill NordWest of

Dunno but would have thought it works the other way around as in low self esteem results in a lower sex drive cos if you aren't feeling good about yourself, you're less likely to have sex on your mind.

Anyhow as others said I don't think fab is the best place to boost self esteem as this place is rather volatile. Also low self esteem isn't normally perceived as attractive trait by others, so it might make it harder to find meets, and exposure to repeated rejection could easily result in a downward spiral experience.

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By *ilverfox74Man  over a year ago

dublin offaly

I get what the op is saying. Low self esteem for as long as I can remember. Working on it now … slow long road but getting there.

Also had the high sex drive and maybe that was there to make myself feel better… didn’t work much but I guess it’s all a learning curve.

It’s is nice to hear good things about one’s self

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By *osmicGateMan  over a year ago

louth


"Just a topic for discussion really. "

Not necessarily a high sex drive but a low self esteem would correlate with being more promiscuous and having multiple sexual partners...imo of course..

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By *razySexyCoolCorkWoman  over a year ago

Cork

I've always had very high sex drive but at times my self esteem/confidence would have held me back. I really don't like feeling negative about my body but it's hard to push the negative feelings aside.

As I'm getting older it definitely helps though. I'm less bothered about what others opinions are of me

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

My tuppence worth is that if there's ever a joint that can blow the crap outta your self esteem it's this place, for either male or female , in different ways , not just because of physical hang ups about a person's body but also a mental hang up regards their sexual performance ability ,a lady l met once here ,who absolutely loved to fuck ,was ,in my eyes beautiful and great craic and sex with her was off the radar but she told me that there was another guy mad to fuck her but when she saw pictures of another lady he sent her that he had fucked she refused simply because she felt the other lady was way hotter and younger than her and after he had fucked the hotter lady ,that if he had sex with her it wouldn't be as good for him ,so even though , believe me , this lady had an unbelievable sex drive, her self esteem dipped when she herself was comparing herself to pictures of another lady.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Just a topic for discussion really.

Not necessarily a high sex drive but a low self esteem would correlate with being more promiscuous and having multiple sexual partners...imo of course.. "

It can do for some, sex provides an ego boost and a brief euphoria which can easily become addictive to someone who is struggling with self-image and/or feeling low.

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