FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > november jokes....join in

november jokes....join in

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Joe wanted to buy a motorbike. He doesn't have much luck until, one day he comes across a Harley with a 'For Sale' sign on it. The bike seems even better than a new one, although it is 10 years old.

It is shiny and in absolute mint condition. He immediately buys it, and asks the seller how he kept it in such great condition for 10 years.

"Well, it's quite simple, really," says the seller, "whenever the

bike is outside and it's going to rain, rub Vaseline on the chrome. It protects it from the rain." And he

hands Joe a jar of Vaseline.

That night, his girlfriend, Sandra, invites him over to meet her parents. Naturally, they take the bike there.

But just before they enter the house, Sandra stops him and says, "I have to tell you something about my family before we go in."

"When we eat dinner, we don't talk. In fact, the first person who says anything during dinner has to do the dishes."

"No problem," he says. And in they go.

Joe is shocked. Right smack in the middle of the living room is a huge stack of dirty dishes. In the kitchen is another huge stack of dishes. Piled up on the stairs, in the corridor, everywhere he looks, dirty dishes.

They sit down to dinner and, sure enough, no one says a word.

As dinner progresses, Joe decides to take advantage of the situation. So he leans over and kisses Sandra. No one says a word. So he reaches over and fondles her breasts. Still, nobody says a word. So he stands up, grabs her, rips her clothes off, throws her on the table, and screws her right there, in front of her parents. His girlfriend is a little flustered, her dad is obviously livid, and her mom horrified when he sits back down, but no one says a word.

He looks at her mom. "She's got a great body," he thinks. So he grabs the mom, bends her over the dinner table, and has his way with her every which way right there on the dinner table. Now his girlfriend is furious and her dad is boiling, but still, total silence.

All of a sudden there is a loud clap of thunder, and it starts to rain. Joe remembers his bike, so he pulls the jar of Vaseline from his pocket.

Suddenly the father backs away from the table and shouts, "All right, that's enough, I'll do the f*cking dishes!"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

oh my god where did you get that one it is brill can i tell a few friends lol

thats the best i have ever read thanks really

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Here's a truly heartwarming story about the bond formed between a little 5-year-old girl and some construction workers that will make you believe that we all can make a difference when we give a child the gift of our time.

A young family moved into a house, next to a vacant lot. One day, a Construction crew turned up to start building a house on the empty lot.

The young family's 5-year-old daughter naturally took an interest in all the activity going on next door and spent much of each day observing the workers.

Eventually the construction crew, all of them "gems-in-the-rough," more or less, adopted her as a kind of project mascot. They chatted with her, let her sit with them while they had tea and lunch breaks, and gave her little jobs to do here and there to make her feel important.

At the end of the first week, they even presented her with a pay envelope containing ten dollars. The little girl took this home to her mother who suggested that she take her ten dollars "pay" she'd received to the bank the next day to start a savings account.

When the girl and her mum got to the bank, the teller was equally impressed and asked the little girl how she had come by her very own pay envelope at such a young age. The little girl proudly replied, "I worked last week with a real construction crew building the new house next door to us."

"Oh my goodness gracious," said the teller, "and will you be working on the house again this week, too?"

The little girl replied, "I will, if those c..ts at Bunnings ever deliver the feckin' gyprock..."

Kind of brings a tear to the eye - doesn't it?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

An older couple were lying in bed one night.

The husband was falling asleep but the wife was in a romantic mood and wanted to talk.

She said: "You used to hold my hand when we were courting."

Wearily he reached across, held her hand for a second and tried to get back to sleep.

A few moments later she said: "Then you used to kiss me."!

Mildly irritated, he reached across, gave her a peck on the cheek and settled down to sleep.

Thirty seconds later she said: "Then you used to bite my neck." Angrily, he threw back the bed clothes and got out of bed.

"Where are you going?" she asked.

"To get my teeth!"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

So, there's this yellow toad wandering around in the forest kinda pissed off because he doesn't want to be yellow.

Life would be easier if he were brown like the other toads... He'd sure be less visible to predators for one thing.

Anyway... This yellow toad bumps into a fairy godmother. "Fairy godmother, please make me brown like the other toads," he begs her. "I'm hacked off being so visible to predators. The stress is like, killing me, you know?"

"Okay" says the fairy godmother, who whips out her magic wand and goes:

"Abracapokus! You're brown!"

The toad looks down and sees that he is brown ! Except..... for his weenie, which is still yellow.

"Hang about lady," he says to the fairy godmother, "My pecker's still yellow!"

"Yeah, well I don't do weenies," she says, "You'll have to go see the Wizard of Oz for that." So the toad thanks her and hops off on his way.

There is also a purple bear wandering about the very same woods. As luck would have it, he encounters the very same fairy godmother (yes okay it's a coincidence, but it's true).

"Fairy Godmother! You're just the person I need!" says the purple bear, "I can't pull any bearesses cos they don't want to be seen with me on account of the hunters. They can spot me from a mile off."

Being a fairly nice fairy godmother, she takes out her magic wand. "Oh for goodness sake, what is the matter with you lot round here." she says. And with that, she yells: "Pokuscadabra! You're brown!"

The bear looks down and sees that he is, in fact, brown. Except for his goolies, which remain purple.

"Hold up sweetheart!", he says to the fairy godmother, "My goolies are still purple!"

"Yeah, well I don't do those goolie things," she replies, "You'll have to go see the Wizard of Oz for that."

"Well that's just dandy, innit?" the bear replies, "How the hell do I find the Wizard of Oz?"

"Easy," says the fairy godmother as she flew off...........

you know what's coming don't you ?

you'll be sorry you ever gave me your email address

after this....

she flew off, saying.......

"Just follow the yellow-dick toad !! "

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

A husband and wife were sitting watching a TV program about psychology when he turned to his wife and said, “Honey, I bet you can’t tell me something that will make me happy and sad at the same time.”

She said, “You have the biggest penis of all your friends.”

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Lmfao..... Classic xxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

There are essentially four kinds of sex …

HOUSE SEX – When you are newly married and have sex all over the house in every room.

BEDROOM SEX – After you have been married for a while, you only have sex in the bedroom.

HALL SEX – After you’ve been married for many, many years you just pass each other in the hall and say “FUCK YOU”.

COURTROOM SEX – When your wife and her lawyer fuck you in the divorce court in front of many people for every penny you’ve got.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Lmfao..... Classic xxx"

yet one level,i wish she knew,lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Little Red Riding Hood was on her way to see her grandmother in the forest. Her mother warned her "Don't walk through the forest, take the path, or else the Big Bad Wolf will catch you and suck your tits dry!" Little Red started towards her grandmother's house but decided to take the shortcut through the forest anyway. The turtle stopped Little Red and warned her "Turn back and use the path, because if the Big Bad Wolf finds you, he'll suck your tits dry!" Little Red was almost there, so she kept going through the forest. Sure enough, the Big Bad Wolf jumps out of nowhere and tells her "Take off your shirt Little Red Riding Hood - I'm gonna suck your tits dry!!". "Oh no you don't", yells Little Red, as she pulls up her skirt, "You're gonna eat me just like the story says!"

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Brenda O'Malley is home making dinner, as usual, when Tim Finnegan arrives at her door.

"Brenda, may I come in?" he asks. "I've somethin' to tell ya".

"Of course you can come in, you're always welcome, Tim. But where's my husband?"

"That's what I'm here to be telling ya, Brenda."

There was an accident down at the Guinness brewery..."

"Oh, God no!" cries Brenda. "Please don't tell me."

"I must, Brenda. Your husband Shamus is dead and gone. I'm sorry.

Finally, she looked up at Tim. "How did it happen, Tim?"

"It was terrible, Brenda. He fell into a vat of Guinness Stout and drowned."

"Oh my dear Jesus! But you must tell me true, Tim. Did he at least go quickly?"

"Well, Brenda... no. In fact, he got out three times to take a piss."

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Grass sandwich

At a local college dance, a guy from America asked the girl from Sweden to dance.

While they were dancing, he gives her a little squeeze, and says, "In America, we call this a hug".

She replies, "Yaah, in Sveden, we call it a hug too."

A little later, he gives her a peck on the cheek, and says, "In America, we call this a kiss".

She replies, "Yaah, in Sveden, we call it a kiss too."

Towards the end of the night, and a lot of drinks later, he takes her out on the campus lawn, and proceeds to have sex with her, and says, "In America, we call this a grass sandwich".

She says, "Yaaah in Sveden, we call it a grass sandwich too, but we usually put more meat in it."

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

A newly wed Jamaican fireman came home from work one day and said to his wife Y'know sumptin, honey, we have a wonderful system at de fire station.

Bell 1 rings - we put on de jackets.

Bell 2 rings - we slide down de pole.

Bell 3 rings - we jump on de ingine and we's ready to go.

From now on, when I says 'Bell one' I want you to strip naked.

When I says 'Bell two', you jump on de bed.

When I says 'Bell tree' we's gonna mek love all tru de night."

The next night he came home and shouted 'Bell One' and she stripped naked.

'Bell Two' and she jumped on the bed.

'Bell Tree', and they started to make love.

After a few minutes the wife yelled out "Bell Four".

"What de hell is 'Bell Four', woman?"

She replied: "Roll out more hose, man, you ain't nowhere near de fire".

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Two men are out drinking one night when one turns to the other and says, "You know, I don't know what else to do. Whenever I go home after we've been out drinking, I turn the headlights off before I get to the driveway. I shut off the engine and coast into the garage. I take my shoes off before I go into the house, I sneak up the stairs, I get undressed in the bathroom. I ease into bed and my wife STILL wakes up and yells at me for staying out so late!"

His friend looks at him and says, "Well, you're obviously taking the wrong approach. I screech into the driveway, slam the door, storm up the steps, throw my shoes into the closet, jump into bed, rub my hands on my wife's bum and say, 'How about a blowjob?' ... and she's always sound asleep

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By *ouple1234Couple over a year ago

BELFAST UK

...Father O'Conner keeps chickens behind the church in a coop. One sunday he goes to feed them and finds the cock's gone missing. He knows there is cock fighting in the village so at mass he questions the congregation, Has anybody got a cock?

All the men stand up, No, no I meant has anybody seen a cock? All the women stand up, No, no, no, that's not what I meant either, Has anybody seen my cock?

16 altar boys, two priests and a goat stood up

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

a man goes to confession for the fist time in years and is amazed to walk into the confession box and find guinness on tap,a selection of fine cigars and pictures of beautiful naked women on the walls.he asks the priest when these changes took place.the priest says " your in the wrong side of the box my child ".

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

How many swingers does it take to screw in a light bulb ?

None. Swingers screw in hot tubs.

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By *oantrimcpl2010Couple over a year ago

Lisburn

“I read in my local newspaper, they had this advert, ‘Please look after your neighbours in the cold weather’, and shall I tell you something about that? I live next door to this 84-year-old woman, do you know, not once has she come round to see if I’m all right. Lazy cow hasn’t even taken her milk in for a fortnight!”

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By *uckscouple2007Couple over a year ago

Bucks

Here's a solution to all the controversy over full-body scanners at the airports.

All we need to do is develop a booth that you can step into that will not X-ray you, but will detonate any explosive device you may have hidden on or in your body. The explosion would be contained within the sealed booth.

This would be a win-win situation for everyone. There'd be none of this **** about racial profiling and the device would eliminate long and expensive trials.

And talk about a deterrent!

This is so simple that it's truly brilliant. I can see it now: You're in the airport terminal and you hear a muffled explosion. Shortly after an announcement comes over the PA system, "Attention standby passengers, we now have a seat available on flight number...!"

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Tony had just finished reading a new book entitled, 'You Can Be The Man of Your House.'

He stormed to his wife in the kitchen and announced, 'From now on, you need to know that I am the man of this house and my word is Law. You will prepare me a gourmet meal tonight, and when I'm finished eating my meal, you will serve me a sumptuous dessert.

After dinner, you are going to go upstairs with me and we will have the kind of sex that I want. Afterwards, you are going to draw me a bath so I can relax. You will wash my back and towel me dry and bring me my robe.

Then, you will massage my feet and hands. Then tomorrow, guess who's going to dress me and comb my hair?'

His Sicilian wife Gina replied, "The fucking funeral director would be my first guess."

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By *uckscouple2007Couple over a year ago

Bucks

A man is dining in a fancy restaurant and there is a gorgeous womansitting at the next table. He has been noticing her since he sat down, but lacks the nerve to talk with her.

Suddenly she sneezes, and her glass eye comes flying out of its socket toward the man. He reflexively reaches out, grabs it out of the air, and hands it back.

'Oh my, I am so sorry,' the woman says as she pops her eye back in place.

'Let me buy your dinner to make it up to you,' she says.

They enjoy a wonderful dinner together, and afterwards they go to the theatre followed by drinks. They talk, they laugh, she shares her deepest dreams and He shares his. She listens.

After paying for everything, she asks him if he would like to come to her place for a nightcap and stay for breakfast. They had a wonderful, wonderful time.

The next morning, she cooks a gourmet meal with all the trimmings. The guy is amazed. Everything had been SO incredible!

'You know,' he said, 'you are the perfect woman. Are you this nice to every guy you meet?'

'No,' she replies. . .

'You just happened to catch my eye.'

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

A woman went into a bar in Texas and saw a cowboy with his feet propped up on a table. He had the biggest feet she’d ever seen. The woman asked the cowboy if it’s true what they say about men with big feet. The cowboy grinned and said, “Sure is, little lady! Why don’t you come on out to the bunk house and let me prove it to you!” The woman wanted to find out for herself, so she spent the night with him. The next morning she handed him a $100 bill. Blushing, he said, “Well, thank ya Ma’am. I’m real flattered. Aitn’t nobody ever paid me fer mah services before. The woman replied, “Don’t be flattered. Take the money and buy yourself some boots that fit.”

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

A woman was at her hairdresser's getting her hair styled for a trip to

Rome with her husband.. She mentioned the trip to the hairdresser, who responded:

" Rome ? Why would anyone want to go there? It's crowded and dirty..

You're crazy to go to Rome . So, how are you getting there?"

"We're taking Continental," was the reply. "We got a great rate!"

"Continental?" exclaimed the hairdresser. " That's a terrible airline.

Their planes are old, their flight attendants are ugly, and they're always

late. So, where are you staying in Rome ?"

"We'll be at this exclusive little place over on Rome's Tiber River called Teste."

"Don't go any further. I know that place. Everybody thinks its gonna be

something special and exclusive, but it's really a dump."

"We're going to go to see the Vatican and maybe get to see the Pope."

"That's rich," laughed the hairdresser. You and a million other people

trying to see him. He'll look the size of an ant.

Boy, good luck on this lousy trip of yours. You're going to need it."

A month later, the woman again came in for a hairdo. The hairdresser

asked her about her trip to Rome.

"It was wonderful," explained the woman, "not only were we on time in one

of Continental's brand new planes, but it was overbooked, and they bumped

us up to first class. The food and wine were wonderful, and I had a

handsome 28-year-old steward who waited on me hand and foot.

And the hotel was great! They'd just finished a €5 million remodeling

job, and now it's a jewel, the finest hotel in the city. They, too, were

overbooked, so they apologized and gave us their owner's suite at no extra charge!"

"Well," muttered the hairdresser, "that's all well and good, but I know

you didn't get to see the Pope."

"Actually, we were quite lucky, because as we toured the Vatican, a Swiss

Guard tapped me on the shoulder, and explained that the Pope likes to meet

some of the visitors, and if I'd be so kind as to step into his private

room and wait, the Pope would personally greet me.

Sure enough, five minutes later, the Pope walked through the door and

shook my hand! I knelt down and he spoke a few words to me."

"Oh, really! What'd he say?"

He said: "Who fucked up your hair ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

This 80 year old woman was arrested for shoplifting in a supermarket.

When she went before the judge he asked her, 'What did you steal?'

She replied, 'A can of peaches.'

The judge then asked her why she had stolen the can of peaches, and she replied that she was hungry.

The judge asked her how many peaches were in the can.

She replied that there were six.

The judge said, 'Then I will give you six days in jail.'

Before the judge could actually pronounce the punishment, the woman's husband stood up, and asked the judge if he could say something.

The judge said, 'What is it?'

The husband said, ‘She also stole a can of peas.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest.

After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly and said; "I'm sorry, your duck (Cuddles) has passed away."

The distressed woman wailed; "Are you sure?"

"Yes, I am sure. The duck is dead." replied the vet.

"How can you be so sure?" she protested. "I mean you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."

The vet rolled his eyes, turned around, and left the room.

He returned a few minutes later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table, and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked up at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.

The vet patted the dog on the head and took it out of the room.

A few minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and also delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly, and strolled out of the room.

The vet looked at the woman and said; "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."

The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman. The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$150!" she cried; "$150 just to tell me my duck is dead!?"

The vet shrugged; "I'm sorry. If you had just taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20, but... with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it's now $150."

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

One day, three men were hiking and unexpectedly came upon a large raging, violent river. They needed to get to the other side, but had no idea of how to do so.

The first man prayed to God, saying, "Please God, give me the strength to cross this river." *Poof!* God gave him big arms and strong legs, and he was able to swim across the river in about two hours, after almost drowning a couple of times.

Seeing this, the second man prayed to God, saying, "Please God, give me the strength ..and the tools to cross this river." *Poof!*

God gave him a rowboat and he was able to row across the river in about an hour, after almost capsizing the boat a couple of times.

The third man had seen how this worked out for the other two, so he also prayed to God saying, "Please God, give me the strength and the tools...And the intelligence... To cross this river." And *Poof!* God turned him into a woman. She looked at the map, hiked upstream a couple of hundred yards, then walked across the bridge.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

man having sex with his wife stops half way through

whats wrong she says???

i cant think of anyone he says lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

The Irish SAS have just stormed Dublin Zoo-they killed three gorillas and have released all the ostriches!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Three men with speech impediments are in therapy. The therapist is blonde, petite and fit as fuck. She says "if you can tell me where I live without stuttering I'll suck your cock and you can cum in my mouth."

The first one stutters Bbbbbbirmingham, the next one Mmmmmmmanchester, the third one Paddy, stands up, composes himself and says "London."

The therapist gets his cock out and gives him the best blow job he's had in his life. As he cums he sighs..."dddddderry!"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

A wife asks her husband to go out shopping and buy her something that would make her look sexy and seductive you should have seen her face when the husband arrived home with 12 Cans of Beer

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By *uckscouple2007Couple over a year ago

Bucks

In Lebanon , men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death.

(Like THAT makes sense.)

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

In Bahrain , a male doctor may legally examine a woman's genitals, but is prohibited from looking directly at them during the examination. He may only see their reflection in a mirror.

(Do they look different reversed?)

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse. This also applies to undertakers. The sex organs of the deceased must be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all times.

(A brick?)

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the privilege of having sex for the first time

Reason: under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to marry.

(Let's just think for a minute; is there any job anywhere else in the world that even comes close to this?)

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

In Cali , Colombia , a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the act.

(Makes one shudder at the thought.)

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

In Santa Cruz , Bolivia , it is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time.

(I presume this was a big enough problem that they had to pass this law?)

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

In Maryland , it is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one exception: Prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only 'in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the premises.'

(Is this a great country or what?

Well, not as great as Guam !)

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

(I know some people like that.)

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Starfish don't have brains.

(I know some people like that, too.)

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

And, the best for last?

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Turtles can breathe through their butts.

(And I thought I had bad breath in the morning!)

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Thank you all for reading this, if you need to reach me in the future I will be in Guam

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Louie walsh, cheryl cole and simom cowel were walking down the street one day when cheryl suddenly breaks a heel,fall head first and jams her head in between some railing,quick as a flash simon drops his jeans, ripps down her thong an proceeds to shag the life out of her, with a final grunt,he slaps her tight arse and pulls out, turning to Louie he says, go on ur turn next, suddently louie bursts into tears,what's wrong louie,simon asks, louie still sobbing replys. I can't, my head won't fit into the railings ........

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Louie walsh, cheryl cole and simom cowel were walking down the street one day when cheryl suddenly breaks a heel,fall head first and jams her head in between some railing,quick as a flash simon drops his jeans, ripps down her thong an proceeds to shag the life out of her, with a final grunt,he slaps her tight arse and pulls out, turning to Louie he says, go on ur turn next, suddently louie bursts into tears,what's wrong louie,simon asks, louie still sobbing replys. I can't, my head won't fit into the railings ........ "

love it

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

THE LIE DETECTOR

John was a salesman's delight when it came to any kind

of unusual gimmicks. His wife Marsha had long ago given

up trying to get him to change.

One day John came home with another one of his unusual

purchases. It was a robot that John claimed was actually a

lie detector.

It was about 5:30 that afternoon when Tommy, their 11 year

old son, returned home from school. Tommy was over 2

hours late. "Where have you been? Why are you over 2 hours

late getting home?" asked John.

"Several of us went to the library to work on an extra credit project," said Tommy.

The robot walked around the table and slapped Tommy,

knocking him completely out of his chair.

"Son," said John, "this robot is a lie detector. Now tell

us where you really were after school."

"We went to Bobby's house and watched a movie." said Tommy.

"What did you watch?" asked Marsha.

"The Ten Commandments." answered Tommy.

The robot went around to Tommy and once again slapped him, knocking him off his chair. With his lip quivering, Tommy got up, sat down and said, "I am sorry I lied.

We really watched a tape called Sex Queen."

"I am ashamed of you son," said John. "When I was

your age, I never lied to my parents."

The robot walked around to John and delivered a whack

that nearly knocked him out of his chair.

Marsha doubled over in laughter, almost in tears and said, "Boy, did you ever ask for that one! You can't be too mad with Tommy. After all, he is your son!"

The robot walked around to Marsha and knocked her out of her chair…

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Have you noticed when you see geese flying and they're in a V pattern, often one side will be longer than the other?

Do you know why that is?

There are more geese on that side.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Pinocchio talks to Gepetto:

- Daddy my dick is all jagged and crooked so I have no success with girls.

- You know, my son, I didn’t care too much about that detail, but that should not be a problem. Go to the shop, take a sandpaper and fix it.

After some time, Gepetto asks Pinocchio:

- Well, did you resolve the problem with the girls?

- Daddy, since I got the sandpaper who needs the girls anymore

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