FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > What am I doing wrong on here
What am I doing wrong on here
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You start your profile with what I assume is a reference to your star sign- though if this is the case it's spelt wrong. That's two things right there that will put a lot of people off. Those who are into their star signs would expect you to know it is Scorpio not scorpion and those who believe star signs are a load of nonsense would lose interest instantly.
You then say you want a likeminded woman but with no explanation of what bits of your mind they need to be like. I've read your profile several times but know nothing about you apart from the fact that possibly you were born late October/November 40 years ago and believe in star signs.
You're not ugly, face photos are confident - though personally we prefer to see a smile than a pout or scowl.
You can't please everyone and being authentically you is going to get you more interest than pretending to be something you're not. With that in mind, if astrology is important to you, keep it in your profile. If you've only included it because you think it'll increase interest, personally I'd bin it. We wouldn't read past that before moving on.
Good luck.
Mr |
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"You start your profile with what I assume is a reference to your star sign- though if this is the case it's spelt wrong. That's two things right there that will put a lot of people off. Those who are into their star signs would expect you to know it is Scorpio not scorpion and those who believe star signs are a load of nonsense would lose interest instantly.
You then say you want a likeminded woman but with no explanation of what bits of your mind they need to be like. I've read your profile several times but know nothing about you apart from the fact that possibly you were born late October/November 40 years ago and believe in star signs.
You're not ugly, face photos are confident - though personally we prefer to see a smile than a pout or scowl.
You can't please everyone and being authentically you is going to get you more interest than pretending to be something you're not. With that in mind, if astrology is important to you, keep it in your profile. If you've only included it because you think it'll increase interest, personally I'd bin it. We wouldn't read past that before moving on.
Good luck.
Mr"
is that better now Dilly x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Your pictures make you look unfriendly and your bio is too brief and also unfriendly. You have to put way more work into your profile to make it appealing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I know I ain't no Pablo Picasso but why do I find it hard to get a womans attention on here... 
What am I doing wrong? Or is it keep trying ? "
your a man there are zillions of men on fab that far outnumber women thats your number one problem before anything else ..
as for anything else only you know you so write about you and what your looking for rather than end up with a profile that look like others who asked for advice |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There is nothing written in your bio about you which one could refer to or relate to really. Put some heart into it I'd say. It doesn't need to be essay worthy but more substantial
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You start your profile with what I assume is a reference to your star sign- though if this is the case it's spelt wrong. That's two things right there that will put a lot of people off. Those who are into their star signs would expect you to know it is Scorpio not scorpion and those who believe star signs are a load of nonsense would lose interest instantly.
You then say you want a likeminded woman but with no explanation of what bits of your mind they need to be like. I've read your profile several times but know nothing about you apart from the fact that possibly you were born late October/November 40 years ago and believe in star signs.
You're not ugly, face photos are confident - though personally we prefer to see a smile than a pout or scowl.
You can't please everyone and being authentically you is going to get you more interest than pretending to be something you're not. With that in mind, if astrology is important to you, keep it in your profile. If you've only included it because you think it'll increase interest, personally I'd bin it. We wouldn't read past that before moving on.
Good luck.
Mr"
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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago
mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds |
What were your expectations op ? You may wish to lower them.
I've not read your bio, however it should tell the reader your wants desires likes, what you offer in return reflecting your personality.
Hopefully you'll create interest with the words, entice with the pictures you use.
Have fun. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There’s nothing in your profile to make me want to engage with you.
Your pics make you look grumpy, and the text doesn’t give anything away about you, the remark about grunting and putting the work in is a bit  , and slightly dismissive. |
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Mistake 1 is thinking fabs = sex
Men outnumber woman 1000 to 1, and even if the numbers weren’t so stacked against you, women hold all the cards here
Messaging is a little pointless and a waste of time compared to going to clubs/socials
Also if you could be taller that’s a great start |
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By *ost SockMan
over a year ago
West Wales and Cardiff |
Hello, fellow Cardiffian .
In my opinion, your profile is really awful. Sorry, I’m saying that in a blunt way, but I couldn’t put it any other way. Cruel to be kind, I guess!
It’s great you have face pics - you’re way braver than me! I think the women I know on here wouldn’t be to keen because you don’t look happy. There’s nothing in the text that gives any insight into your character either, beyond sounding a bit, well, “caveman-like”, really!
Fab isn’t “rubbish” - it can be great for guys. It’s been a good experience for me, and I’m older.
It needs effort and buying in to the overall community. Get known as a decent, interesting guy with things to say on all sorts, and unexpected things can and do develop. Honest .
Good luck |
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Think of your profile as a shop window (we all know women love to shop)
Does it draw their attention and make them want to see more? In my opinion..no (but that's just my opinion. I think its quite bland, says next to nothing about you and your pics don't really show you in a good light. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I know I ain't no Pablo Picasso but why do I find it hard to get a womans attention on here...
What am I doing wrong? Or is it keep trying ? "
For me it’s keep trying mate!!
Everyone on this thread has hit the nail on the head surrounding profile and pics (not that mine are great) but I also think jumping into the forum is a good way to express your personality also and another way of potentially finding someone who is the right fit for you and you for them!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You are called caveman and you like loud grunting during sex. I think that may narrow your appeal. "
but don't change that, as that is you ! Fab isn't about appealing to everyone as then you appeal to noone. Find your niche and market there
Imo, you need to have fun with that. Rather than the negative status have Fred looking for his Wilma (and Betty). Show that you get what primal caveman sex looks like, and what the dynamic really is.
And get a pic with a dinosaur. If you can't find a real one, maybe a toy.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Everyone will have different opinions on what to change on your profile. For me though if you are confident enough to put a face pic up maybe smile abit, I'm sure you're not a moody so and so but it kinda looks like you are. And if u are a moody git, eh, cheer up it's Christmas .  |
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"I know I ain't no Pablo Picasso but why do I find it hard to get a womans attention on here...
What am I doing wrong? Or is it keep trying ? "
I don't know if you are doing anything wrong for others....... but for me ...... your profile is utter shite. Very self defensive and dismissive wording...
You don't mention one thing you offer for a meet. You seem very blase,as if you think telling people you won't be putting yourself out and they need to accept you as you are and jump on the very little you offer - smacks of a lack of confidence.
So maybe you rely on your face ..... I's not the worse face i've seen but I don't fancy you. You look very scowly in it but TOP MARKS for showing your full face.
Your tag line is very negative.
Well there MUST be some women on here who have on their profile.... Looking for a scowly bloke in Wales who says like it or lump it and doesn't like the site much....
There MUST be loads. If you stay here, they will come.
Good luck xx |
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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago
Hull |
OP.
You joined this site a year ago in the midst of a pandemic when few people were meeting or were being very cautious.
What did you expect? This is NOT Instant Shag! In effect, you are up against 100's, if not 1000's of other guys Ll wanting the same thing!
Your profile has to be like a Job CV. You have to say what YOU can contribute to any meet, whilst saying what you EXPECT from it too
You effectively have to SELL yourself to make an impression. YOU have to get noticed, so....
Put up a friendly facial pic. People when meeting you will go for a smiling face!
Don't include any negativity anywhere in your profile. EG, to say "this site is useless, or I'm pig ugly" is just negative and others will move on to a more positive profile.
Expand your profile to include the suggestions I mentioned above and those from others.
Get to Socials in your area & become involved in the Forum Pages. It's all about being NOTICED!!!
You will need Patience, and Perseverance by the bucket load, along with a thick skin as rejections will occur.
Have you read the Site Advice that a No Reply to any messages you send out, means the recipient isn't interested!
This site DOES work, but you have to put in the effort to stand out against the rest.
Good luck. |
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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago
Stoke area |
I didn't see your profile originally, but there is no star sign reference, so you must have acted on advice given earlier. So that's a good start.
You have an age range that's not 18 to 99, another positive.
Now add some smiling friendly looking face pics, and let people know why they should be interested in you, and what you offer, rather than saying what you want and your profile will be much improved.
Send out individual messages to people that are written specifically for them and maybe attend socials or a club near you and that will improve your chances further.
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Grumpy looking, abrupt and a v can't be arsed bio. I wouldn't be keen to find out more.
Why do men find it so hard to put some effort in?
I absolutely hate whiney tag lines about the site and the lack of action. It screams petulant child.
Have a look at other guys profiles and see where you're going wrong.
Effort=results it's not rocket science. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Op,
1st mistake is asking anyone on forums.. A significant number on here have never met anyone either..
Keyboard warriors, idiots and ppl up thier own arse make up the majority of the rest!
(there are some superb, experienced, lovely folk as well!)
Be yourself, be honest be open be friendly..
Have fun and stay relaxed.. It'll happen
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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago
mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds |
"what are you doing wrong?
You are one of thousands of men who out number women 100-1
therefore women cn be picky, if you arent very special then you have no chance.
plus its not insta shag"
Numbers.. not all about numbers, if the numbers were evenly split if you weren't what the other person was looking for makes no difference.
***News flash ****
Unless any holes ya goal anyone and everyone can say no thanks, picky ain't the preserve of just ladies,
I'm nothing special and I do ok. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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First of all, don’t ask what your doing wrong. Your admitting that your doing something wrong.
I like to imagine it’s everyone else that doesn’t know the correct rules. |
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By *host63Man
over a year ago
Bedfont Feltham |
It dosnt matter what yiu put or pics on your profile.
The fact is as a single guy you are outnumbered. There are very few women ot couples that want men and those that do are extremely fussy and specific in what they actually want.
So unless yiu look like a Greek god with a dick the size of a large cucumber and swing both ways and have the stamina of a marathon runner and cum like a fire extinguisher with 200 million and a house in the Costa Blanca as well as a small mansion in the UK I am afraid reality is you ain't gonna get anywhere or mYbe once in 10 years.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It dosnt matter what yiu put or pics on your profile.
The fact is as a single guy you are outnumbered. There are very few women ot couples that want men and those that do are extremely fussy and specific in what they actually want.
So unless yiu look like a Greek god with a dick the size of a large cucumber and swing both ways and have the stamina of a marathon runner and cum like a fire extinguisher with 200 million and a house in the Costa Blanca as well as a small mansion in the UK I am afraid reality is you ain't gonna get anywhere or mYbe once in 10 years.
"
I have told you ten million times to stop exaggerating? |
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Well I ain't a woman but if I was I reckon reading your most recent status would put me right off.
"This suite is useless .. or i must be pig ugly lol"
C'mon man, stop the self pity. You're looking for a lady to spend some intimate time with. Not after a hug from your mum! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just had a look fella, your pics aren't very welcoming and honestly if in your profile you think that being dismissive and telling people bye bye is going to endure anyone to want to meet you then I can only see you either giving up, or not meeting at all. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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even though some have said it's not that effective..I'd def try putting a range of pictures though..
A bit more in the bio.(.my bio itself is sparse & i think i need to add to it.) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm always wary of giving advice on these issues but anyway here goes. Studies have shown most dating sites people swipe right or show their interest based initially on attraction. Now this dating site (and it is one) is structured a bit difficult, but the same fundamental rules apply, hence everyone asks for face pics on initial messages (some ask for cock pics as well) so my humble suggestion is, take a break from the site, work on yourself a bit. It could be something small like growing a beard, changing your hair cut and as I'm sure you'll notice lots of women like guys who are athletic or gym fit bodies, so you can also do that as well (btw I got in the best shape of my life earlier this year using a dip and pull up station and a weighted vest).
These sites are mostly based on physical attraction, tap into that and you're in, everything else is on the periphery.
Hope my honest advice helps and that I'm not attacked to heavily for this.
Disclaimer of course you also need to be respectful and don't send dick pics unless asked for etc. |
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My advice would be add some nicer photos,
add some more interesting things to read on your bio,
and be more flattering in stating what it is that you are looking for,
the ladies here have so so many gorgeous men to choose from, ask yourself why would they choose YOU given how poorly your profile represents you?????
Good luck. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My advice would be add some nicer photos,
add some more interesting things to read on your bio,
and be more flattering in stating what it is that you are looking for,
the ladies here have so so many gorgeous men to choose from, ask yourself why would they choose YOU given how poorly your profile represents you?????
Good luck. "
This is good advice |
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By *ost SockMan
over a year ago
West Wales and Cardiff |
"It dosnt matter what yiu put or pics on your profile.
The fact is as a single guy you are outnumbered. There are very few women ot couples that want men and those that do are extremely fussy and specific in what they actually want.
So unless yiu look like a Greek god with a dick the size of a large cucumber and swing both ways and have the stamina of a marathon runner and cum like a fire extinguisher with 200 million and a house in the Costa Blanca as well as a small mansion in the UK I am afraid reality is you ain't gonna get anywhere or mYbe once in 10 years.
"
OP, the above isn’t true. I have none of the things on the above list, but have managed to have some lovely experiences on here. I’m far from a Fab legend and a far from the only one.
It can be done . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm always wary of giving advice on these issues but anyway here goes. Studies have shown most dating sites people swipe right or show their interest based initially on attraction. Now this dating site (and it is one) is structured a bit difficult, but the same fundamental rules apply, hence everyone asks for face pics on initial messages (some ask for cock pics as well) so my humble suggestion is, take a break from the site, work on yourself a bit. It could be something small like growing a beard, changing your hair cut and as I'm sure you'll notice lots of women like guys who are athletic or gym fit bodies, so you can also do that as well (btw I got in the best shape of my life earlier this year using a dip and pull up station and a weighted vest).
These sites are mostly based on physical attraction, tap into that and you're in, everything else is on the periphery.
Hope my honest advice helps and that I'm not attacked to heavily for this.
Disclaimer of course you also need to be respectful and don't send dick pics unless asked for etc. "
It’s really interesting that you view Fab as a dating site, other refer to it as a sex site and each to their own to call it want you want and use it how you please.
For me and many others it is a social media site for likeminded people.
The way you approach it and your expectations will give you a sense of success or failure |
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"It dosnt matter what yiu put or pics on your profile.
The fact is as a single guy you are outnumbered. There are very few women ot couples that want men and those that do are extremely fussy and specific in what they actually want.
So unless yiu look like a Greek god with a dick the size of a large cucumber and swing both ways and have the stamina of a marathon runner and cum like a fire extinguisher with 200 million and a house in the Costa Blanca as well as a small mansion in the UK I am afraid reality is you ain't gonna get anywhere or mYbe once in 10 years.
OP, the above isn’t true. I have none of the things on the above list, but have managed to have some lovely experiences on here. I’m far from a Fab legend and a far from the only one.
It can be done ."
Yep, absolutely not true and to blame a stereotype for lack of success shows clearly why there's lack of success.
You want to get laid? Then be the best version of yourself. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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1. You're outnumbered massively. Even 2s and 3s in the street are a solid 8 on here and aren't short of offers. If you're not careful, you'll end up in an auction trying to outbid 10/20 other people for an old banger because the numbers are stacked against you. Don't do it, you'll feel dirty afterwards haha.
2. Looks are important on here. People who say otherwise aren't being truthful. If they don't like what they see, they won't even bother striking up a conversation to find out more. So try message people who are in the same league as you. I've not seen your pics, but be honest with yourself.
3. Your profile isn't as important as people make out either. Obviously put something in it that's relevant. It doesn't have to be Shakespeare, but make sure the spelling is correct. Apparently that's really important and correlates directly to how good you are with your dick haha.
4. It's really cliquey on here and in the clubs, so not being in the cliques or knowing someone who knows someone goes against you too.
My advice, don't take it seriously, don't get offended by the lack of replies and go on PoF if all else fails. You'll definitely get a shag from there haha.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"1. You're outnumbered massively. Even 2s and 3s in the street are a solid 8 on here and aren't short of offers. If you're not careful, you'll end up in an auction trying to outbid 10/20 other people for an old banger because the numbers are stacked against you. Don't do it, you'll feel dirty afterwards haha.
2. Looks are important on here. People who say otherwise aren't being truthful. If they don't like what they see, they won't even bother striking up a conversation to find out more. So try message people who are in the same league as you. I've not seen your pics, but be honest with yourself.
3. Your profile isn't as important as people make out either. Obviously put something in it that's relevant. It doesn't have to be Shakespeare, but make sure the spelling is correct. Apparently that's really important and correlates directly to how good you are with your dick haha.
4. It's really cliquey on here and in the clubs, so not being in the cliques or knowing someone who knows someone goes against you too.
My advice, don't take it seriously, don't get offended by the lack of replies and go on PoF if all else fails. You'll definitely get a shag from there haha.
"
It's actually 50 or 60 men per old banger. 
Apart from that it's all true. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm always wary of giving advice on these issues but anyway here goes. Studies have shown most dating sites people swipe right or show their interest based initially on attraction. Now this dating site (and it is one) is structured a bit difficult, but the same fundamental rules apply, hence everyone asks for face pics on initial messages (some ask for cock pics as well) so my humble suggestion is, take a break from the site, work on yourself a bit. It could be something small like growing a beard, changing your hair cut and as I'm sure you'll notice lots of women like guys who are athletic or gym fit bodies, so you can also do that as well (btw I got in the best shape of my life earlier this year using a dip and pull up station and a weighted vest).
These sites are mostly based on physical attraction, tap into that and you're in, everything else is on the periphery.
Hope my honest advice helps and that I'm not attacked to heavily for this.
Disclaimer of course you also need to be respectful and don't send dick pics unless asked for etc.
It’s really interesting that you view Fab as a dating site, other refer to it as a sex site and each to their own to call it want you want and use it how you please.
For me and many others it is a social media site for likeminded people.
The way you approach it and your expectations will give you a sense of success or failure"
It’s a recreational sex site but some try to paint it as a social meeting site.
It’s like clubs having themed evenings which seem to me to be utterly ridiculous. OnHalloween I saw one person exiting a play room after what appeared to be a boisterous social interaction session. The make up had run and it look the said person had been ( badly) embalmed.
Leather and lace, red or dead, and other spurious names seem to be redundant to the main intention? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"1. You're outnumbered massively. Even 2s and 3s in the street are a solid 8 on here and aren't short of offers. If you're not careful, you'll end up in an auction trying to outbid 10/20 other people for an old banger because the numbers are stacked against you. Don't do it, you'll feel dirty afterwards haha.
2. Looks are important on here. People who say otherwise aren't being truthful. If they don't like what they see, they won't even bother striking up a conversation to find out more. So try message people who are in the same league as you. I've not seen your pics, but be honest with yourself.
3. Your profile isn't as important as people make out either. Obviously put something in it that's relevant. It doesn't have to be Shakespeare, but make sure the spelling is correct. Apparently that's really important and correlates directly to how good you are with your dick haha.
4. It's really cliquey on here and in the clubs, so not being in the cliques or knowing someone who knows someone goes against you too.
My advice, don't take it seriously, don't get offended by the lack of replies and go on PoF if all else fails. You'll definitely get a shag from there haha.
"
Now I kinda made myself promise that I would stop being all ranty about things so I’m going to try and take this comment as a joke (as I really hope it was) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Get your cock out OP and you’ll be beating them off with a big shitty stick
Any correlation?
Yes, more cock = more attention "
I meant the big shitty stick part  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Get your cock out OP and you’ll be beating them off with a big shitty stick
Any correlation?
Yes, more cock = more attention
I meant the big shitty stick part "
So did I |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"1. You're outnumbered massively. Even 2s and 3s in the street are a solid 8 on here and aren't short of offers. If you're not careful, you'll end up in an auction trying to outbid 10/20 other people for an old banger because the numbers are stacked against you. Don't do it, you'll feel dirty afterwards haha.
2. Looks are important on here. People who say otherwise aren't being truthful. If they don't like what they see, they won't even bother striking up a conversation to find out more. So try message people who are in the same league as you. I've not seen your pics, but be honest with yourself.
3. Your profile isn't as important as people make out either. Obviously put something in it that's relevant. It doesn't have to be Shakespeare, but make sure the spelling is correct. Apparently that's really important and correlates directly to how good you are with your dick haha.
4. It's really cliquey on here and in the clubs, so not being in the cliques or knowing someone who knows someone goes against you too.
My advice, don't take it seriously, don't get offended by the lack of replies and go on PoF if all else fails. You'll definitely get a shag from there haha.
It's actually 50 or 60 men per old banger.
Apart from that it's all true. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"1. You're outnumbered massively. Even 2s and 3s in the street are a solid 8 on here and aren't short of offers. If you're not careful, you'll end up in an auction trying to outbid 10/20 other people for an old banger because the numbers are stacked against you. Don't do it, you'll feel dirty afterwards haha.
2. Looks are important on here. People who say otherwise aren't being truthful. If they don't like what they see, they won't even bother striking up a conversation to find out more. So try message people who are in the same league as you. I've not seen your pics, but be honest with yourself.
3. Your profile isn't as important as people make out either. Obviously put something in it that's relevant. It doesn't have to be Shakespeare, but make sure the spelling is correct. Apparently that's really important and correlates directly to how good you are with your dick haha.
4. It's really cliquey on here and in the clubs, so not being in the cliques or knowing someone who knows someone goes against you too.
My advice, don't take it seriously, don't get offended by the lack of replies and go on PoF if all else fails. You'll definitely get a shag from there haha.
Now I kinda made myself promise that I would stop being all ranty about things so I’m going to try and take this comment as a joke (as I really hope it was)"
Why, what's up? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Get your cock out OP and you’ll be beating them off with a big shitty stick
Any correlation?
Ooh get you
Correlation
 just say
Connected "
But my Eton professor would never forgive me  |
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"You are called caveman and you like loud grunting during sex. I think that may narrow your appeal. "
Definitely this.
The mention of squirters also would put me off.
The second face pic is good
You really need some body shots |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You don't have to alter your body to fit in. There's someone for everyone.
My suggestion would be to take some time to look at other single guys' profiles. See what grabs your attention and what doesn't. Same with the photos. Then apply that to your own profile. Looking at what photos get the most fabs on a profile tells you a lot about what people like to see on here. |
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By *atty39Man
over a year ago
Manchester |
Iv seen very good looking dudes complain about never get messages on these forums too so it's definitely nothing to do with looks it's just the way off the Internet theres thousands of guys to every one woman and that one woman will most likely get dozens of messages every day from different men, its very difficult for all blokes on any type of online just all about patience one day you'll get a hi |
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