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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Seeing as it's St George's Day, I'll have the full English please with extra gammon.
However, if the gravy boat turns up at my table then I shall be sending it straight back. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Seeing as it's St George's Day, I'll have the full English please with extra gammon.
However, if the gravy boat turns up at my table then I shall be sending it straight back."
Rest assured we do not serve gravy with breakfast  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Is now open for your breakfast needs, what can I get you? 
Plenty of coffee and a avocado poached eggs on toast please darling  x"
As you asked so nicely |
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By *IG G77Man
over a year ago
GATLEY |
"Is now open for your breakfast needs, what can I get you?
Plenty of coffee and a avocado poached eggs on toast please darling x
As you asked so nicely "
I always ask nicely and thankyou and can I do something in return for you ? x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Is now open for your breakfast needs, what can I get you?
Plenty of coffee and a avocado poached eggs on toast please darling x
As you asked so nicely
I always ask nicely and thankyou and can I do something in return for you ? x"
Yes, can you pop that toaster please  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Two hash browns. One croissant but it has to be freshly baked.
And seeing as it's a fictional café and seasons don't apply, a pumpkin spice latte."
All of our menu items are cooked and baked fresh, of course coming right up |
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By *IG G77Man
over a year ago
GATLEY |
"Is now open for your breakfast needs, what can I get you?
Plenty of coffee and a avocado poached eggs on toast please darling x
As you asked so nicely
I always ask nicely and thankyou and can I do something in return for you ? x
Yes, can you pop that toaster please "
Certainly this could be the best breakfast I ever have x |
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By *TG3Man
over a year ago
Swanage |
"Can i have a five egg omelette with cheese and onion and a well done sausage bap please all with brown sauce
Of course a breakfast for champions "
I had that yesterday.... Was gorgeous |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Bacon sausage egg barm cake please.
Cup of builders tea to go with it please. X
Of course, a barm cake is just a bap right?
Nooooooo boobs are baps.
"
Oh. Eh?
Bacon, sausage and egg on some sort of bread type thingamajig |
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"Bacon sausage egg barm cake please.
Cup of builders tea to go with it please. X
Of course, a barm cake is just a bap right?
Nooooooo boobs are baps.
Oh. Eh?
Bacon, sausage and egg on some sort of bread type thingamajig "
 |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Morning, just a big bowl of Ready Brek and a huge vat of Yorkshire tea please. Any chance of some syrup on the ready brek though ?
Many thanks "
It is a crime to serve ready brek without syrup here |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Strong Yorkshire tea not to much milk no sugar and well done bacon on brown toast please
Has to be well done bacon. Of course
Crispy plenty best butter on the toast "
Done and done |
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"I'd love a bacon and egg Sarni, but holiday in 3 weeks means just coffee for me...
A calorie-less bacon and egg sarnie coming right up "
That was an option!? You may just be the perfect woman!
In that case I'll have some crumpets, Eggs Benedict and a tunnocks teacake to finish. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'd love a bacon and egg Sarni, but holiday in 3 weeks means just coffee for me...
A calorie-less bacon and egg sarnie coming right up
That was an option!? You may just be the perfect woman!
In that case I'll have some crumpets, Eggs Benedict and a tunnocks teacake to finish. "
We aim to please, all of our menu items have calorieless options |
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"I'd love a bacon and egg Sarni, but holiday in 3 weeks means just coffee for me...
A calorie-less bacon and egg sarnie coming right up
That was an option!? You may just be the perfect woman!
In that case I'll have some crumpets, Eggs Benedict and a tunnocks teacake to finish.
We aim to please, all of our menu items have calorieless options "
Well in that case I'll take you too! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Please may I have a Cappuccino with a chocolate sprinkle design of some boobies on top?
This will fill my heart with much joy "
We actively encourage naughty chocolate sprinkle designs, you should see our stencils |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Is now open for your breakfast needs, what can I get you?
Is it too inappropriate to ask the waitress for a date? "
Of course not, my shift finishes at 12 |
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"Seeing as it's St George's Day, I'll have the full English please... "
I will have whatever my erstwhile lookalike, Shakespeare, would have had on his birthday.
Accompanied, of course, by Nell Gwyn's juicy oranges. |
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"Is now open for your breakfast needs, what can I get you?
Good morning beautiful Bella 
Can I please have a snog followed by a gallon of black coffee and a mound of McDs hash browns?
Thank you "
Bella, if you want to sub contract this one out, then I’m available, or better still we will deliver this together. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Is now open for your breakfast needs, what can I get you?
I need a drink healthy one to get rid of my nausea.
I think plain hot buttered toast."
Coming right up hope that sorts you |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Seeing as it's St George's Day, I'll have the full English please...
I will have whatever my erstwhile lookalike, Shakespeare, would have had on his birthday.
Accompanied, of course, by Nell Gwyn's juicy oranges."
Of course |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Is now open for your breakfast needs, what can I get you?
Good morning beautiful Bella
Can I please have a snog followed by a gallon of black coffee and a mound of McDs hash browns?
Thank you "
Good morning gorgeous
Of course, plus another snog.. all part of the service  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Is now open for your breakfast needs, what can I get you?
Good morning beautiful Bella
Can I please have a snog followed by a gallon of black coffee and a mound of McDs hash browns?
Thank you
Bella, if you want to sub contract this one out, then I’m available, or better still we will deliver this together. "
Oi fiddles, I'm not sharing this one |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Poached eggs on sourdough with some finely chopped chives and some cracked sea salt please and a caramel latte
Your too kind !"
Sounds good, coming right up |
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"Is now open for your breakfast needs, what can I get you?
Good morning beautiful Bella
Can I please have a snog followed by a gallon of black coffee and a mound of McDs hash browns?
Thank you
Bella, if you want to sub contract this one out, then I’m available, or better still we will deliver this together.
Oi fiddles, I'm not sharing this one "
That’s a lot of hash browns for just the two of you. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Strong back coffee, yoghurt and granola.
Need to get beach body ready 
All of our menu items are calorie free, full English coming right up
In that case can I have a side of Welsh please "
Oh you |
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By *del 1Man
over a year ago
London |
"Right sexy people that's me clocked off. My tip jar is full thank you  but who put the buttons in there  
Have a lovely day and may your cups be ever full "
Great shift today Bella! I am sure everyone definitely enjoyed their breakfast xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Right sexy people that's me clocked off. My tip jar is full thank you but who put the buttons in there
Have a lovely day and may your cups be ever full
Great shift today Bella! I am sure everyone definitely enjoyed their breakfast xx"
Wait, people got food?!?? |
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