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Instant judgement
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"Would you instantly judge someone for the style of their hair or type of clothes they wear. I personally reserve judgement until we've spoken.
What's the context?"
When you look at someone say with a Monica tattoos piercings and dark clothing and think they are trouble. Or would you reserve judgement until you had spoken |
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"Would you instantly judge someone for the style of their hair or type of clothes they wear. I personally reserve judgement until we've spoken.
What's the context?
When you look at someone say with a Monica tattoos piercings and dark clothing and think they are trouble. Or would you reserve judgement until you had spoken "
That's mohican |
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"Would you instantly judge someone for the style of their hair or type of clothes they wear. I personally reserve judgement until we've spoken.
What's the context?
When you look at someone say with a Monica tattoos piercings and dark clothing and think they are trouble. Or would you reserve judgement until you had spoken "
There are a lot of people in my family who look like that. I'd probably judge them to be ok and nice to be around. |
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"Would you instantly judge someone for the style of their hair or type of clothes they wear. I personally reserve judgement until we've spoken.
What's the context?
When you look at someone say with a Monica tattoos piercings and dark clothing and think they are trouble. Or would you reserve judgement until you had spoken
There are a lot of people in my family who look like that. I'd probably judge them to be ok and nice to be around. "
I instantly get judged on my appearance but the people that talk to me always say I'm such a gentleman and softy. |
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"Would you instantly judge someone for the style of their hair or type of clothes they wear. I personally reserve judgement until we've spoken.
What's the context?
When you look at someone say with a Monica tattoos piercings and dark clothing and think they are trouble. Or would you reserve judgement until you had spoken
There are a lot of people in my family who look like that. I'd probably judge them to be ok and nice to be around.
I instantly get judged on my appearance but the people that talk to me always say I'm such a gentleman and softy."
I instantly get judged on my appearance too. People judge me to be posh and rich. I'm neither. |
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I try to never judge. I just make an informed decision on whether we would get on or not based on based on my personality and theirs, which would be from speaking with them and knowing a bit more about them and their general views on life. |
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"Would you instantly judge someone for the style of their hair or type of clothes they wear. I personally reserve judgement until we've spoken.
What's the context?
When you look at someone say with a Monica tattoos piercings and dark clothing and think they are trouble. Or would you reserve judgement until you had spoken
There are a lot of people in my family who look like that. I'd probably judge them to be ok and nice to be around.
I instantly get judged on my appearance but the people that talk to me always say I'm such a gentleman and softy.
I instantly get judged on my appearance too. People judge me to be posh and rich. I'm neither. "
The funny thing is the older ladies always ask me for help if they need it. I've spoken to people off here and I'm now their unofficial confidant |
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"Would you instantly judge someone for the style of their hair or type of clothes they wear. I personally reserve judgement until we've spoken.
What's the context?
When you look at someone say with a Monica tattoos piercings and dark clothing and think they are trouble. Or would you reserve judgement until you had spoken
There are a lot of people in my family who look like that. I'd probably judge them to be ok and nice to be around.
I instantly get judged on my appearance but the people that talk to me always say I'm such a gentleman and softy.
I instantly get judged on my appearance too. People judge me to be posh and rich. I'm neither.
The funny thing is the older ladies always ask me for help if they need it. I've spoken to people off here and I'm now their unofficial confidant "
I attract the bus stop chatters. |
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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago
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"Would you instantly judge someone for the style of their hair or type of clothes they wear. I personally reserve judgement until we've spoken.
What's the context?
When you look at someone say with a Monica tattoos piercings and dark clothing and think they are trouble. Or would you reserve judgement until you had spoken "
I would absolutely judge someone with a Monica tattoo
Phoebe was the best |
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"Would you instantly judge someone for the style of their hair or type of clothes they wear. I personally reserve judgement until we've spoken.
What's the context?
When you look at someone say with a Monica tattoos piercings and dark clothing and think they are trouble. Or would you reserve judgement until you had spoken
I would absolutely judge someone with a Monica tattoo
Phoebe was the best "
Stupid auto correct didn't like Mohican |
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"Not at all! Being a metal head with facial piercings and a wardrobe that’s alternative and mostly black I’ve encountered it myself. Never judge a book by the cover "
That's me except I have a mohican my clothes are dark lots of skulls etc |
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As a big weirdo myself I don't think poorly of people who choose to present themselves as something other than the norm.
If someone gives off dickhead vibes I'll think they're a dickhead. Doesn't mean I won't give them the opportunity to prove me wrong if the context is relevant. But part of the survival instinct is to recognise threats. Ignoring that for the sake of being inclusive and not judgemental seems dumb 💜 |
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"Not at all! Being a metal head with facial piercings and a wardrobe that’s alternative and mostly black I’ve encountered it myself. Never judge a book by the cover
That's me except I have a mohican my clothes are dark lots of skulls etc"
We do get some funny looks |
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I might form an initial opinion on them until I had actually spoken to them.
I judge people on their actions rather than their appearance.
I have worked with lots of people over the years who were big into the punk scene or heavy metal.
They were no different to anyone else I worked with or knew.
Some were and are amazing human beings while others were cunts but that has nothing to do with their haircut or tatts. |
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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago
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I think we all do it to an extent, without even realising. I have blue hair and have noticed a lot of people looking and judging me without speaking to me first. |
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I try not to… having funky hair colours that change every few months and a fair amount of tattoos…. I try to reserve judgement.. but sometimes it’s just instinctive and you can’t really control it 🤷🏻♀️ |
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Yes we do, especially on the scene. If for example, we arranged a social meet and they turned up in jogging bottoms we would be disappointed. First impressions do count.
Our first impressions can of course turn out to be wrong but it's what we go off. |
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"I think most people form an initial impression. It's whether people are willing to overcome it that's the question "
This for me. Initially judge because that's human instinct, then happy to be convinced otherwise, better or worse. |
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"I try not to… having funky hair colours that change every few months and a fair amount of tattoos…. I try to reserve judgement.. but sometimes it’s just instinctive and you can’t really control it 🤷🏻♀️"
My old FWB had a chest piece, slightly similar to you, Amy Winehouse -type tattoos and bright hair and piercings.
She would attract quite a few stares (more likely looks of disapproval) but was actually a very kind person who dedicated her life in her job and outside of it helping so many people. |
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"I judge people on first impressions, but I continue to evaluate that judgement as I learn more about them, sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse.
"
This.
Inwardly though. I’ll admit I’m very judgemental. In my own head though 🙂😇 |
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No. And an extra no to solidify my answer 
In fact the more outlandish you appear the more I’d probably like you. My admiration for those who literally walk their own path helps me gain the confidence to do the same.  |
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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago
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"People judge and people that say they don't lie and judge hahahah
Fab is all about judgment!!!!
You beat me to it "
Don't you be agreeing with me now hahahaha
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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago
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"As somebody who had a lot of tattoos before it became the ‘in thing’ I was judged a lot, most people would say, ‘god I was shit scared of you until you spoke to me’
Maybe I liked it that way  "
Where are these tattoos at i feel like some judgment hahaha |
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By *mmaleiaWoman 25 weeks ago
Trowbridge |
"As somebody who had a lot of tattoos before it became the ‘in thing’ I was judged a lot, most people would say, ‘god I was shit scared of you until you spoke to me’
Maybe I liked it that way
Where are these tattoos at i feel like some judgment hahaha"
Hidden away, done late 80’s early 90’s! |
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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago
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"As somebody who had a lot of tattoos before it became the ‘in thing’ I was judged a lot, most people would say, ‘god I was shit scared of you until you spoke to me’
Maybe I liked it that way
Where are these tattoos at i feel like some judgment hahaha
Hidden away, done late 80’s early 90’s! "
Hidden whyy??? |
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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago
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"Would you instantly judge someone for the style of their hair or type of clothes they wear. I personally reserve judgement until we've spoken.
What's the context?
When you look at someone say with a Monica tattoos piercings and dark clothing and think they are trouble. Or would you reserve judgement until you had spoken "
I would say that's my perfect women  |
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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago
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"People judge and people that say they don't lie and judge hahahah
Fab is all about judgment!!!!
You beat me to it
Don't you be agreeing with me now hahahaha
I do sometimes agree with men  "
Just not on other things hahaha |
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Such narrow mindedness on here. I personally don't judge anyone unless they've given me a very good reason to.
This is a case of "never judge a book by its cover" but there's a hell of a lot of judgement on this thread which says a lot more about the poster than the subject. Arrogant bigotry. I mean, some of these comments are disgraceful.
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"Such narrow mindedness on here. I personally don't judge anyone unless they've given me a very good reason to.
This is a case of "never judge a book by its cover" but there's a hell of a lot of judgement on this thread which says a lot more about the poster than the subject. Arrogant bigotry. I mean, some of these comments are disgraceful.
"
You're judging people right there on what you've just said. |
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"Such narrow mindedness on here. I personally don't judge anyone unless they've given me a very good reason to.
This is a case of "never judge a book by its cover" but there's a hell of a lot of judgement on this thread which says a lot more about the poster than the subject. Arrogant bigotry. I mean, some of these comments are disgraceful.
"
You must be reading a different thread? I don't see any arrogance or bigotry on this one. |
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"Such narrow mindedness on here. I personally don't judge anyone unless they've given me a very good reason to.
This is a case of "never judge a book by its cover" but there's a hell of a lot of judgement on this thread which says a lot more about the poster than the subject. Arrogant bigotry. I mean, some of these comments are disgraceful.
"
I think a certain level of initial judgment is pretty useful, probably evolved as a defence mechanism to be wary of anything we consider different or outside the norm. |
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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago
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"Would you instantly judge someone for the style of their hair or type of clothes they wear. I personally reserve judgement until we've spoken. "
definitely wouldn’t judge a person’s personality based on looks but we 💯 could be turned off by how someone looks. We’re both are involved in another hobby that attracts all sorts of people some are way out there regarding how they look and some are pretty average Joe but the vast majority are amazing people
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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago
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Yes. People make snap judgments all the time about people they’ve just met. Sometimes the judgments are good, sometimes they’re bad. Sometimes those judgments can be changed almost instantly, others can change over time and sometimes we’re right first time.
There’s no harm in quiet and internal judgments as long as you’re openminded enough to realise you’re judging with no evidence.
I’d never voice those judgements or treat someone badly because of how they look. It’s up to me to challenge my own thoughts |
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"Would you instantly judge someone for the style of their hair or type of clothes they wear. I personally reserve judgement until we've spoken. definitely wouldn’t judge a person’s personality based on looks but we 💯 could be turned off by how someone looks. We’re both are involved in another hobby that attracts all sorts of people some are way out there regarding how they look and some are pretty average Joe but the vast majority are amazing people "
Finally, someone else that plays Dungeons and Dragons!  |
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"Such narrow mindedness on here. I personally don't judge anyone unless they've given me a very good reason to.
This is a case of "never judge a book by its cover" but there's a hell of a lot of judgement on this thread which says a lot more about the poster than the subject. Arrogant bigotry. I mean, some of these comments are disgraceful."
·
I think you're confusing judgement with damnation. |
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Yes I would.
I'll use an analogy i once heard as a young man.
"If someone served you a plate of what looked like dog poo, would you take a bite to find out in the hope its choclate"?
It was acctually about cooking and presentation but there's a social aspect to it.
First impressions matter is all I'm saying.
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There’s some ten out of tens with absolutely diabolical personalities, there’s also some four out of tens with the same, looks are way down the list, yes it depends on the circumstances but if it’s on here there needs to be an attraction but in non fab life, personality and attitude are all important |
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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago
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OP I get you about reserving judgement BUT, and I won’t be elaborating, just because everyone can get dreads doesn’t mean they should 
And I’m 100% judging some of the people that make that decision |
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Even if we're unaware that we're doing it we instinctively judge on first sight. It's what kept our ancestors relatively safe. Our conscious minds might kick in and tell us that we need to get to know a person to find out if that initial judgement is correct. |
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"Would you instantly judge someone for the style of their hair or type of clothes they wear. I personally reserve judgement until we've spoken. "
I only judge people by their actions, anything else is discrimination  |
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"Would you instantly judge someone for the style of their hair or type of clothes they wear. I personally reserve judgement until we've spoken.
I only judge people by their actions, anything else is discrimination "
I would say its my stereotyping over discrimination , I judge people initially by markers I can see , we all have our own world views on things and this is part of it .
its always interesting finding out if the pre thought is the same after dealing with someone .. |
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"Would you instantly judge someone for the style of their hair or type of clothes they wear. I personally reserve judgement until we've spoken. "
It's human nature to judge/have bias. Then hopefully we are mature enough to challenge our own judgements and biases in our heads. |
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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago
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"If someone looks like a homeless i dont want to speak to them"
I truly hope you never end up in a position of being homeless or potentially homeless or even at a point where the way you look is less important than food or water
Then you may regret this when you become part of the “great unseen and unwanted” |
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I think in this environment physical attraction is a big part of it surely for everyone ? but it would be wrong to assume everyone is judging you the same, everyone likes what they like and what one person finds attractive another won’t, it’s just all part of the game |
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By *orefun1Man 25 weeks ago
Durham/H'pool |
We are all judging everything around us, all of the time. It's in-built, Part of our self-preservation and survival instincts.
What I think we shouldn't do is to arrive at a conclusion about someone or something, until we have a more/enough information. Our first impression could be correct, but also it could change as we get to know someone. |
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We are all judging people's profiles to determine whether we meet or not, so I guess some judgement when you meet is inevitable. I wouldn't let any judgements that I make predetermine whether I might see the person again until I've had a conversation with them. I like to assess all the available information before making that decision. |
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"Would you instantly judge someone for the style of their hair or type of clothes they wear. I personally reserve judgement until we've spoken. "
the fact that you decided to reserve judjement until you've spoken to them shows you've already made a judgement based on their appearance. |
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"Would you instantly judge someone for the style of their hair or type of clothes they wear. I personally reserve judgement until we've spoken.
What's the context?
When you look at someone say with a Monica tattoos piercings and dark clothing and think they are trouble. Or would you reserve judgement until you had spoken "
Not trouble no. People I've met who dress like that are generally pretty chill. Like everyone, I've developed my own stereotypes that I'll use until a person demonstrates they don't fit them. Mohicans, tattoos and dark clothing don't have a trouble stereotype for me.
We all make judgements within seconds of seeing someone. Anyone who claims they don't is lying to themselves. I believe the trick isn't pretending we don't make such judgements but acknowledging it and ensuring that, where necessary, we judge a person on their behaviour not our preconceived ideas.
It's perfectly reasonable to make unquestioned judgements about random strangers with whom we are not going to interact. On the other hand, in an interview for example, it is important to question our stereotypes and be aware of our biases and actively work to ensure they are not clouding our judgement.
P |
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