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I'm really d*unk
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I've had too much wine and I'm lying on the sofa unable to go to bed because I'm too shitfaced...I've tried completing the top hot videos of 2024 to try and sober myself up, but I'm still a bit buzzy. Anyone got any sobering solutions? |
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By *tr8MrEMan 14 weeks ago
somewhere near Sheffield |
"I've had too much wine and I'm lying on the sofa unable to go to bed because I'm too shitfaced...I've tried completing the top hot videos of 2024 to try and sober myself up, but I'm still a bit buzzy. Anyone got any sobering solutions?"
Scientifically it is possible to drink yourself sober...or try black coffee |
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By *olo180Man 14 weeks ago
West London |
"I've had too much wine and I'm lying on the sofa unable to go to bed because I'm too shitfaced...I've tried completing the top hot videos of 2024 to try and sober myself up, but I'm still a bit buzzy. Anyone got any sobering solutions?"
Head under the cold tap! |
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I've always been a coherent d*unk typer, it's one of my superpowers!
I think maybe a drinking game is a good idea. Who's in? Is it possible to play cyber strip poker? Someone take my phone away from me...I'm shitfaced, remember |
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"I've always been a coherent d*unk typer, it's one of my superpowers!
I think maybe a drinking game is a good idea. Who's in? Is it possible to play cyber strip poker? Someone take my phone away from me...I'm shitfaced, remember "
Oh dear.
I have a royal flush.
Now get ya kit off.  |
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By *elloWoman 13 weeks ago
alpha centauri |
"I've always been a coherent d*unk typer, it's one of my superpowers!
I think maybe a drinking game is a good idea. Who's in? Is it possible to play cyber strip poker? Someone take my phone away from me...I'm shitfaced, remember
Oh dear.
I have a royal flush.
Now get ya kit off. "
 I only got 1 card and it's the joker,  who was the cheating dealer |
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"I've always been a coherent d*unk typer, it's one of my superpowers!
I think maybe a drinking game is a good idea. Who's in? Is it possible to play cyber strip poker? Someone take my phone away from me...I'm shitfaced, remember
Oh dear.
I have a royal flush.
Now get ya kit off.
I only got 1 card and it's the joker, who was the cheating dealer "
(Whistles innocently).  |
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By *orny PTMan 13 weeks ago
Peterborough |
"I've had too much wine and I'm lying on the sofa unable to go to bed because I'm too shitfaced...I've tried completing the top hot videos of 2024 to try and sober myself up, but I'm still a bit buzzy. Anyone got any sobering solutions?"
Find out what you future pensions will be like, now that is sobering.
As Peter Gabriel once said...
The wine's all d*unk and so am I
Here with the hoi-poloi, don't ask me why' |
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By *tr8MrEMan 13 weeks ago
somewhere near Sheffield |
"After 5 everyone say the name of a card and whoever matches has to take off their pants.
1
2
3
4
5
Tad difficult, I'm naked already
Phwoar   "
I'm crap at cards, so thought if get head start and just let you all catch up🤣🤣 |
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"Talking of Mrs Bun the Baker..
Who was the sexiest Cluedo character?
I always thought Professor Plum was fitAF
True story - the lead pipe was actually a dildo. "
Knew it! And the rope was to incapacitate during the dildoing? |
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"Talking of Mrs Bun the Baker..
Who was the sexiest Cluedo character?
I always thought Professor Plum was fitAF
Mrs Scarlett, but she had a femme fatale thing going on"
I'd forgotten her..I reckon she was fucking Col.Mustard |
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By *tr8MrEMan 13 weeks ago
somewhere near Sheffield |
"Talking of Mrs Bun the Baker..
Who was the sexiest Cluedo character?
I always thought Professor Plum was fitAF
True story - the lead pipe was actually a dildo.
Knew it! And the rope was to incapacitate during the dildoing?"
Nooo, that was so the game would relate to bondage players too |
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"Talking of Mrs Bun the Baker..
Who was the sexiest Cluedo character?
I always thought Professor Plum was fitAF
True story - the lead pipe was actually a dildo.
Knew it! And the rope was to incapacitate during the dildoing?"
And the candlestick is a buttplug. |
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By (user no longer on site) 13 weeks ago
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"Talking of Mrs Bun the Baker..
Who was the sexiest Cluedo character?
I always thought Professor Plum was fitAF
Mrs Scarlett, but she had a femme fatale thing going on
I'd forgotten her..I reckon she was fucking Col.Mustard"
Defo had him tied up in the library with the rope. |
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"Talking of Mrs Bun the Baker..
Who was the sexiest Cluedo character?
I always thought Professor Plum was fitAF
Mrs Scarlett, but she had a femme fatale thing going on
I'd forgotten her..I reckon she was fucking Col.Mustard"
Their son would be 'Master Orange' |
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By *tr8MrEMan 13 weeks ago
somewhere near Sheffield |
"Professor Plum and miss scarlett, in the drawing room with the lead pipe, some rope, a pinwheel, lube and a fist.
Oooft  I'm going to show my innocence...what's a pin wheel?!"
It's exactly what it says it is |
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"Professor Plum and miss scarlett, in the drawing room with the lead pipe, some rope, a pinwheel, lube and a fist.
Oooft I'm going to show my innocence...what's a pin wheel?!"
Well...........
Ermmmmmmm.........  |
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"Professor Plum and miss scarlett, in the drawing room with the lead pipe, some rope, a pinwheel, lube and a fist.
Oooft I'm going to show my innocence...what's a pin wheel?!
It's exactly what it says it is "
Thanks for clearing that up  |
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"Professor Plum and miss scarlett, in the drawing room with the lead pipe, some rope, a pinwheel, lube and a fist.
Oooft I'm going to show my innocence...what's a pin wheel?!"
It's a small metal tool with a wheel that has points. Imagine lying naked and blindfolded with someone running it gently over your skin.
It feels really quite nice.
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"I can't remember the other pieces. Was there a scotty dog and a boot or am I imagining it?
Now we've gone from cluedo to Monopoly
Ha oh yeah. Wait for when I do the swerve to Mousetrap"
Kinky.... |
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By *tr8MrEMan 13 weeks ago
somewhere near Sheffield |
"I can't remember the other pieces. Was there a scotty dog and a boot or am I imagining it?
Now we've gone from cluedo to Monopoly
Ha oh yeah. Wait for when I do the swerve to Mousetrap"
Can I be the naked dude on the diving board?? |
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Yeah but I like to wait at the end till the funs over.
Well this has done the trick, I'm sober and ready for bed. Thanks for keeping me company.
If someone could put a blackcurrant squash with ice by my bed for when I wake that would be lovely. Night night love you all xxxxbyeeeeee |
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"Yeah but I like to wait at the end till the funs over.
Well this has done the trick, I'm sober and ready for bed. Thanks for keeping me company.
If someone could put a blackcurrant squash with ice by my bed for when I wake that would be lovely. Night night love you all xxxxbyeeeeee"
Sleep well, hope your head is OK in the morning.
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