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Being an introvert sucks…
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…or does it?!
If you are one, how do you find being on Fab?
I couldn’t imagine doing clubs/parties. I suppose Fab caters for all and the advice would be, just do what you’re comfortable with!
What about meets, how did they go for you? |
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By (user no longer on site) 10 weeks ago
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I can't really do busy/loud environments and I've yet to meet anyone for anything not even socially as i would like to get to know someone before there be a potential of intimacy |
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"I can't really do busy/loud environments and I've yet to meet anyone for anything not even socially as i would like to get to know someone before there be a potential of intimacy "
I expect most replies will be similar to yours, Buddy. |
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Introvert here, so group socials are absolute hell for me! Though I am pushing myself outside my comfort zone and have committed to one in July.
Have no problem with them (and clubs) though if I'm with a partner or trusted friend, when actually I feel like - by my standards - I become something of an extravert! 😂 |
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"Introvert here, so group socials are absolute hell for me! Though I am pushing myself outside my comfort zone and have committed to one in July.
Have no problem with them (and clubs) though if I'm with a partner or trusted friend, when actually I feel like - by my standards - I become something of an extravert! 😂"
Weird isn’t it how you can go from one to the other in a really short space of time?!
I bet you’ll have a great time at the social. |
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"I am introverted and the thoughts of going to a social and trying to mingle make me want to get into my pj's and veg.
But I do make the effort. If Im not feeling it, I stay only a while and go. "
I’ve left so many do’s without saying a word to people. Just can’t be there anymore and have to leave as the environment and/or person is too much |
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I have worked in public facing roles all my career, so in a way I don’t *look* like an introvert, but crowds are difficult for me. Add loud music and concerts, for example, are absolute hell for me.
Socials are a good way to start, you could go to a smaller one? I was so lucky at my very first one that I was one of the first to arrive and the lovely hostess introduced me to people as they arrived. That helped ease my nerves. I still need to get a breather for a few minutes so I disappear for a bit and come back.
And there are lots and lots of introverts on here who prefer to chat for quite a while before moving on to meeting in person, just make sure you’re messaging people you like and that you fit in what they’re looking for.  |
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By (user no longer on site) 10 weeks ago
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In written form I come across as a cheeky/chirpy annoying extrovert but in reality I am more of an introvert.
Introvert and Extrovert are blanket terms though...none of us are really completely one or the other.
We can all be different depending on the circumstances...
And us mostly introverts must push against the temptation to wothdraw inwards .. |
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"I have worked in public facing roles all my career, so in a way I don’t *look* like an introvert, but crowds are difficult for me. Add loud music and concerts, for example, are absolute hell for me.
Socials are a good way to start, you could go to a smaller one? I was so lucky at my very first one that I was one of the first to arrive and the lovely hostess introduced me to people as they arrived. That helped ease my nerves. I still need to get a breather for a few minutes so I disappear for a bit and come back.
And there are lots and lots of introverts on here who prefer to chat for quite a while before moving on to meeting in person, just make sure you’re messaging people you like and that you fit in what they’re looking for. "
Thanks, I think that’s great advice. I especially like leaving for a bit (like a time out!!) and returning.
Yeah, I’m not sure I’d enjoy being first at a social!!! |
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"I think socialising is just a muscle that some of us need to build up.
I don't struggle at all with one on one socials but group setting makes me want to break out into hives. "
I agree. You’re definitely not alone there! |
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"In written form I come across as a cheeky/chirpy annoying extrovert but in reality I am more of an introvert.
Introvert and Extrovert are blanket terms though...none of us are really completely one or the other.
We can all be different depending on the circumstances...
And us mostly introverts must push against the temptation to wothdraw inwards .."
You’ve described me well there! |
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By (user no longer on site) 10 weeks ago
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Introvert here. I’m fortunate that I have a friend I can go to clubs with who’s much more social and charismatic than I am. I won’t be doing any solo nights in the future. I also won’t be a regular on the club/party scene either as it’s far too expensive for a single guy.
I 100% prefer private meets. I like getting to know someone over messages first. Then having a social in person and if we have chemistry we go from there. By the time we actually do spend the night together we’ve already built up some rapport and trust.
I know people roll their eyes at this but I’m very picky. For me it’s about how well we get on. Are we compatible? Do we have common ground? If it’s a couple I’m meeting (even solo hot wife play) I need to get on with the husband too. I’m not a spontaneous person when it comes to this and I don’t want to be.
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By *aizyWoman 10 weeks ago
west midlands |
"In written form I come across as a cheeky/chirpy annoying extrovert but in reality I am more of an introvert.
Introvert and Extrovert are blanket terms though...none of us are really completely one or the other.
We can all be different depending on the circumstances...
And us mostly introverts must push against the temptation to wothdraw inwards .."
This is me to a T! It is the main reason why I have never gone to a lounge social, I am quite shy irl when I first meet someone, the thought of meeting a group of strangers 😱 |
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By (user no longer on site) 10 weeks ago
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"In written form I come across as a cheeky/chirpy annoying extrovert but in reality I am more of an introvert.
Introvert and Extrovert are blanket terms though...none of us are really completely one or the other.
We can all be different depending on the circumstances...
And us mostly introverts must push against the temptation to wothdraw inwards ..
This is me to a T! It is the main reason why I have never gone to a lounge social, I am quite shy irl when I first meet someone, the thought of meeting a group of strangers 😱"
Yep, totally get...the social anxiety is real....even organised meets seem a bit too "real"  |
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I have social anxiety. You'd think that concerts and group socials would be a living Hell for me, but they're quite the opposite. Everyone is there for the same reason. I can blend in, or slip out (if needs be). One-to-one socials sound like Hell to me!  |
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By (user no longer on site) 10 weeks ago
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I'm very much introverted and socially awkward however it's not hindered my fab experience, people are aware of this prior to meeting, I've attended socials with my husband and a club on my own for ladies night which I was terrified about but the lovely ladies made me feel at ease.
I try and push myself a little otherwise I'd never leave the house 😂 |
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I am an introvert and have social anxiety/ general awkwardness.
Group events would be hell and even a solo meet has me anxious at times but I generally feel like those meets go well.
On the flip side, I find it easier to communicate via written word and show myself in pics rather than showing myself in public |
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I am an introvert but Fab actually helped me be more outgoing. I still find busy clubs or socials a huge challenge, due to the fact that I struggle to hear in noisy environments and can't stand for too long. I am also not a drinker, so no "Dutch courage". But I am more than happy to lie on the bed in a club, naked, and have my partner, or my FWB, play with me or use the gloves on me, for all to see. |
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Full of confidence at work, with colleagues and the public. Social situations I can be quiet until I get to know someone. I don't want to be the centre of attention, like people watching. I come out of my shell the more I meet the same people.
Fab is great for pushing me and I need it  |
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By (user no longer on site) 10 weeks ago
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I wouldn't say I'm necessarily introverted.
But what I do definitely requires that 'turtle under the shell' time, otherwise the creativity goes.
I like the feeling of going a hike with no-one around, in the middle of nowhere too.
But I like meeting new people too.
& I also actually like speaking to an audience, whereas I think most people don't.
(I don't think this generally effects how I use fab) |
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"I have social anxiety. You'd think that concerts and group socials would be a living Hell for me, but they're quite the opposite. Everyone is there for the same reason. I can blend in, or slip out (if needs be). One-to-one socials sound like Hell to me! "
I understand this thought process. If it works for you, then all good  |
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"I'm very much introverted and socially awkward however it's not hindered my fab experience, people are aware of this prior to meeting, I've attended socials with my husband and a club on my own for ladies night which I was terrified about but the lovely ladies made me feel at ease.
I try and push myself a little otherwise I'd never leave the house 😂"
I think pushing yourself out of your comfort zone is the bit most people struggle with. Probably through not the best experience before?! |
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"I am an introvert and have social anxiety/ general awkwardness.
Group events would be hell and even a solo meet has me anxious at times but I generally feel like those meets go well.
On the flip side, I find it easier to communicate via written word and show myself in pics rather than showing myself in public "
Yep, writing for me is not an issue too. |
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"Full of confidence at work, with colleagues and the public. Social situations I can be quiet until I get to know someone. I don't want to be the centre of attention, like people watching. I come out of my shell the more I meet the same people.
Fab is great for pushing me and I need it "
Really strange how we can convince ourselves to be different outwardly in different environments isn’t it. Loads of seemingly confident people struggle with imposter syndrome apparently and I totally see why! |
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"I wouldn't say I'm necessarily introverted.
But what I do definitely requires that 'turtle under the shell' time, otherwise the creativity goes.
I like the feeling of going a hike with no-one around, in the middle of nowhere too.
But I like meeting new people too.
& I also actually like speaking to an audience, whereas I think most people don't.
(I don't think this generally effects how I use fab)"
Public speaking scares the hell out of me. I see others doing it with ease and it just makes me want to curl up in a ball and hide!! |
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I love an introverted man who's shy.
I like men who are genuine and kind and know how to take care of you. In my limited experience that's what introverted men do.
If the introverted men can find a ambivert or extrovert female to get to know and go to some small socials with it can work really work well.
I for one am ambivert who would love to go to some clubs and socials but can't find someone I can go with who gets me and makes me feel comfortable and I do them.
I think there are more females like me out there. Perhaps that sort of friendship/partnership could work for you?
Just a thought.
Jx |
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By (user no longer on site) 10 weeks ago
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"I'm very much introverted and socially awkward however it's not hindered my fab experience, people are aware of this prior to meeting, I've attended socials with my husband and a club on my own for ladies night which I was terrified about but the lovely ladies made me feel at ease.
I try and push myself a little otherwise I'd never leave the house 😂
I think pushing yourself out of your comfort zone is the bit most people struggle with. Probably through not the best experience before?! "
It is & it's very difficult for me too, however if we don't move forward we just stand still.
You have to go get what you want out of life, yes it's scary, yes I may sit on a corner and hide & it may take me several visits before I speak but still, I do it, I'll continue to do it otherwise I wouldn't be here, it would be absolutely pointless.
I haven't played at a club because my awkwardness always gets the better of me, but I have met so many amazing people I've had dates with away from the club one on one. |
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"I love an introverted man who's shy.
I like men who are genuine and kind and know how to take care of you. In my limited experience that's what introverted men do.
If the introverted men can find a ambivert or extrovert female to get to know and go to some small socials with it can work really work well.
I for one am ambivert who would love to go to some clubs and socials but can't find someone I can go with who gets me and makes me feel comfortable and I do them.
I think there are more females like me out there. Perhaps that sort of friendship/partnership could work for you?
Just a thought.
Jx"
What’s the old say, opposites attract. I think you’re right, it would work well for me. The difficulty is finding the right combination/match as always though x |
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"I'm very much introverted and socially awkward however it's not hindered my fab experience, people are aware of this prior to meeting, I've attended socials with my husband and a club on my own for ladies night which I was terrified about but the lovely ladies made me feel at ease.
I try and push myself a little otherwise I'd never leave the house 😂
I think pushing yourself out of your comfort zone is the bit most people struggle with. Probably through not the best experience before?!
It is & it's very difficult for me too, however if we don't move forward we just stand still.
You have to go get what you want out of life, yes it's scary, yes I may sit on a corner and hide & it may take me several visits before I speak but still, I do it, I'll continue to do it otherwise I wouldn't be here, it would be absolutely pointless.
I haven't played at a club because my awkwardness always gets the better of me, but I have met so many amazing people I've had dates with away from the club one on one."
I love your attitude!
I appreciate your kind intentions x |
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"I love an introverted man who's shy.
I like men who are genuine and kind and know how to take care of you. In my limited experience that's what introverted men do.
If the introverted men can find a ambivert or extrovert female to get to know and go to some small socials with it can work really work well.
I for one am ambivert who would love to go to some clubs and socials but can't find someone I can go with who gets me and makes me feel comfortable and I do them.
I think there are more females like me out there. Perhaps that sort of friendship/partnership could work for you?
Just a thought.
Jx
What’s the old say, opposites attract. I think you’re right, it would work well for me. The difficulty is finding the right combination/match as always though x "
Persevere as I think it's out there for both of us! 😊 |
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"…or does it?!
If you are one, how do you find being on Fab?
I couldn’t imagine doing clubs/parties. I suppose Fab caters for all and the advice would be, just do what you’re comfortable with!
What about meets, how did they go for you? "
What is an introvert to you ?
Sometimes people work from different definitions.
I'd consider myself an introvert and I have no problem with meeting people or being in groups etc .....
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I've been trying to break out of being an introvert. It's not been easy but not as difficult I thought it would be. I haven't had any meets but then I don't send messages all that much. I have done a social event and been to a club though. Once you bite the bullet, it's not so bad. |
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"…or does it?!
If you are one, how do you find being on Fab?
I couldn’t imagine doing clubs/parties. I suppose Fab caters for all and the advice would be, just do what you’re comfortable with!
What about meets, how did they go for you? "
We are all both sides the philosophical coin. Its just people have a tendency to behave introverted or extroverted because they simply haven't exercised the opposite side of the coin enough.
Perhaps you are here to explore your extroverted being? It might be an idea for you to attend a club or party just once, to simply experience it and push the boundaries of your comfort zone.
Some say life begins at the edge of your comfort zone after all |
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By (user no longer on site) 10 weeks ago
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"I wouldn't say I'm necessarily introverted.
But what I do definitely requires that 'turtle under the shell' time, otherwise the creativity goes.
I like the feeling of going a hike with no-one around, in the middle of nowhere too.
But I like meeting new people too.
& I also actually like speaking to an audience, whereas I think most people don't.
(I don't think this generally effects how I use fab)
Public speaking scares the hell out of me. I see others doing it with ease and it just makes me want to curl up in a ball and hide!! "
Yes, I didn't enjoy those presentations you have to do at school/ college, in a subject you're not really interested in..
But..
I think if you can find something you love/ have a passion for, that's a better foundation...you can then maybe ease yourself into it..🙂 |
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I like being an introvert. I like my own company, but I also like people, going to socials, even the occasional club event (despite sensory difficulties). I enjoy all of that, and I love getting home and having a couple of days of doing bugger all in my own space.
Mrs |
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