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A little less conversation
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A little more action, please….
Does this work? Talk less and you’ll get more action, or, are you more likely be sexually attracted to someone you’ll get along with.
*Because if it’s the former, there must be a lot of getting there leg over because its awfully quite here to strike up a decent back and forth.
So, who’d like some action, or a decent flirt at least and see where it goes?
Would anyone like to join in? |
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I can't imagine myself being sexually attracted to someone I don't get along with. Therefore for me it's all about the long and protracted chat. A "decent back and forth" is my default setting, my happy place.
However if this thread serves to strike up that initial conversation, wherever it may lead, then yes I'll join in.
I like bonking but I'm not into expedited bonking. |
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Hmmm depends on the scenario.
Some of the best sex I ever had was a meet where she had requested no talking, no small talk, just the physical primal stuff.
Won't always work but fuck me that was great sex |
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Conversation AND action please! For me if the former isn’t there, the latter is very unlikely to occur.
Finding those who possess the ability to not only engage in stimulating conversation but also maintain it is a whole different ball game. |
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By *ora777Woman 3 weeks ago
Daventry |
I'm really into the conversation , I'm turned on by people who are funny and original , yes I know it's leading to sex talk and asking for pics etc ....but it's nice to have a pretty journey before the destination |
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As my profile bio says..
"You need to excite my mind before you excite anything else, and chemistry is extremely important."
I couldn't have sex with someone without having spoken to them and establishing a mental attraction as well as physical. Even in a club environment. |
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"Oh I’m only here at the moment for chats and socials, more conversation and less asking for action please "
This leads an interesting conversation.
I get group socials, however one on one socials with the opposite sex, from a sex site.. surely there’s more inference than just a social.. it’s bound to send signals of other things! 🙈 |
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"How long to chat before meeting. If say messaging nearly every day several messages . Days, weeks, months ? "
Daily messaging is a huge turn off for me. How long you chat for before meeting this up to the two of you there’s no formula it can be days, usually weeks / months or in a couple of cases years on here for me before we get round to meeting, I think it’s important that both of you are going at the same pace that works for you both |
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Situational 🤔 on fab yeah I like the conversation as it’s more about compatibility so happy to spend time learning about someone.
On a night out it’s a different vibe sexual chemistry can be enough for me, nothing wrong with falling in love for a few hours based on pure attraction 🥵 |
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"Oh I’m only here at the moment for chats and socials, more conversation and less asking for action please
This leads an interesting conversation.
I get group socials, however one on one socials with the opposite sex, from a sex site.. surely there’s more inference than just a social.. it’s bound to send signals of other things! 🙈"
I guess the one-on-one socials do send signals, but I like to meet someone before any action. Helps understand what each other is looking for and discuss boundaries etc.. if your not compatible you can always walk away before getting in too deep (pun intended) |
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As was said further up, if you don't excite the mind you don't excite the body.
Times can vary. There's been times I met someone the day after their first message, there's been time it's been years of on and off back and forth before the opportunity arose.
Messaging every day over prolonged periods is exhausting. I like things quite transient. If there's nothing interesting or exciting to discuss then leave me in peace until there is rather than fluff with small talk.
Of my current partners most were the months or years of knowing each other before it progressed to more, one was just one of those next day deals, but that one's been a thing for two decades now.
Generally I like to exist to someone as an entire person rather than as a convenient place to put their penis 💜 |
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By *aizyWoman 3 weeks ago
west midlands |
"How long to chat before meeting. If say messaging nearly every day several messages . Days, weeks, months ?
Daily messaging is a huge turn off for me. How long you chat for before meeting this up to the two of you there’s no formula it can be days, usually weeks / months or in a couple of cases years on here for me before we get round to meeting, I think it’s important that both of you are going at the same pace that works for you both"
This is the same for me too, I don't think you can put a time limit on it. |
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I don't start conversations on here. The last time I did was January 2020.
Every conversation since has been started by someone else but I haven't met anyone new in those 5½ years either and that's by choice.
When I was meeting I always insisted on long chats before any mention of meeting and even then it would always be a social.
All that is explained clearly on my profile so there is no room for negotiation.
Some chats fizzle out but I have gone weeks or even months before agreeing to meet some people.
It has never once failed because in 9 years I've never had a no show or been one and never been catfished or engaged with a fake profile.
That works for me but probably not for everyone.
Some people just don't have the patience. |
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"I'm really into the conversation , I'm turned on by people who are funny and original , yes I know it's leading to sex talk and asking for pics etc ....but it's nice to have a pretty journey before the destination "
I imagine a very pretty journey with you…😏 |
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"I need my mind stimulating a little before my body 🤷♀️"
And I suppose that’s why so many on here leave when they don’t get to chat.
This was always my issue with online things like here, you send a message and it goes into the oblivion. And who knows if you’ll get a reply. 🤷♂️
How do you get excited when nobody talks back to you? |
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"I need my mind stimulating a little before my body 🤷♀️
And I suppose that’s why so many on here leave when they don’t get to chat.
This was always my issue with online things like here, you send a message and it goes into the oblivion. And who knows if you’ll get a reply. 🤷♂️
How do you get excited when nobody talks back to you? "
Yeah i get that it is frustrating when you try and feel your getting nothing back.
But i think when you finally do and get that convo flowing its worth it! 😘 |
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By *vaRoseWoman 3 weeks ago
Ankh-Morpork |
"Oh I’m only here at the moment for chats and socials, more conversation and less asking for action please
This leads an interesting conversation.
I get group socials, however one on one socials with the opposite sex, from a sex site.. surely there’s more inference than just a social.. it’s bound to send signals of other things! 🙈"
Oh fuck no
My profile and messages leave no room for misinterpretation. Right now I’m here solely for genuine flirty conversation and cordial socials. A coffee is just a coffee, not a subtext for something else.
Consent and clear boundaries aren’t suggestions; they’re non-negotiable. Consent isn’t a riddle, and it’s not up for reinterpretation over coffee. If someone chooses to ignore that in the hope they’ll be the ‘exception’, they won’t be meeting me at all.
Reading into what isn’t there, projecting intent where none was given, and then dressing it up as innocent ‘conversation’… that’s not insight, it’s manipulation. |
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"I need my mind stimulating a little before my body 🤷♀️
And I suppose that’s why so many on here leave when they don’t get to chat.
This was always my issue with online things like here, you send a message and it goes into the oblivion. And who knows if you’ll get a reply. 🤷♂️
How do you get excited when nobody talks back to you?
Yeah i get that it is frustrating when you try and feel your getting nothing back.
But i think when you finally do and get that convo flowing its worth it! 😘"
We think so 😉 |
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"Oh I’m only here at the moment for chats and socials, more conversation and less asking for action please
This leads an interesting conversation.
I get group socials, however one on one socials with the opposite sex, from a sex site.. surely there’s more inference than just a social.. it’s bound to send signals of other things! 🙈"
Absolutely not. A social is just that whether it’s with someone from Fab or Pete off the bus. If a person thinks differently I wouldn’t be having a social with them. Simples |
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"Oh I’m only here at the moment for chats and socials, more conversation and less asking for action please
This leads an interesting conversation.
I get group socials, however one on one socials with the opposite sex, from a sex site.. surely there’s more inference than just a social.. it’s bound to send signals of other things! 🙈
Absolutely not. A social is just that whether it’s with someone from Fab or Pete off the bus. If a person thinks differently I wouldn’t be having a social with them. Simples "
That’s fair enough, I was speaking from personal experience I suppose! I haven’t been clear enough in my boundaries in the past ( although I thought I was) and the other party was definitely expecting more than a social!🙈 so I have a narrow minded perspective, which is why I wanted outside opinions x |
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"Oh I’m only here at the moment for chats and socials, more conversation and less asking for action please
This leads an interesting conversation.
I get group socials, however one on one socials with the opposite sex, from a sex site.. surely there’s more inference than just a social.. it’s bound to send signals of other things! 🙈
Oh fuck no
My profile and messages leave no room for misinterpretation. Right now I’m here solely for genuine flirty conversation and cordial socials. A coffee is just a coffee, not a subtext for something else.
Consent and clear boundaries aren’t suggestions; they’re non-negotiable. Consent isn’t a riddle, and it’s not up for reinterpretation over coffee. If someone chooses to ignore that in the hope they’ll be the ‘exception’, they won’t be meeting me at all.
Reading into what isn’t there, projecting intent where none was given, and then dressing it up as innocent ‘conversation’… that’s not insight, it’s manipulation. "
This is more or less where I'm coming from and it's interesting to note that it's not just men who believe they are the exception to the rule.
I've lost count of the number of messages I've had when I was meeting who insisted that I couldn't set boundaries on fab because if I was honest with myself, men don't have options here and should be grateful for any attention.
Since I've stopped meeting, those type of messages have continued, with suggestions that I'm just holding out for the right offer and that surely I shouldn't be here if the first line of my bio was correct.
I've always had options on fab, not because I'm anything special, but because I've maintained my self respect and have turned down at least twice as many offers as I've accepted.
I've met 60+ people in 9 years and half of those were at group socials.
Of the 30 or so I've met one on one, only one of those was without a social and only 10 percent of the total meets have gone beyond that initial social.
My choice every single time and I have no regrets. As I said above, my method works for me. |
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By *vaRoseWoman 3 weeks ago
Ankh-Morpork |
"Oh I’m only here at the moment for chats and socials, more conversation and less asking for action please
This leads an interesting conversation.
I get group socials, however one on one socials with the opposite sex, from a sex site.. surely there’s more inference than just a social.. it’s bound to send signals of other things! 🙈
Oh fuck no
My profile and messages leave no room for misinterpretation. Right now I’m here solely for genuine flirty conversation and cordial socials. A coffee is just a coffee, not a subtext for something else.
Consent and clear boundaries aren’t suggestions; they’re non-negotiable. Consent isn’t a riddle, and it’s not up for reinterpretation over coffee. If someone chooses to ignore that in the hope they’ll be the ‘exception’, they won’t be meeting me at all.
Reading into what isn’t there, projecting intent where none was given, and then dressing it up as innocent ‘conversation’… that’s not insight, it’s manipulation.
This is more or less where I'm coming from and it's interesting to note that it's not just men who believe they are the exception to the rule.
I've lost count of the number of messages I've had when I was meeting who insisted that I couldn't set boundaries on fab because if I was honest with myself, men don't have options here and should be grateful for any attention.
Since I've stopped meeting, those type of messages have continued, with suggestions that I'm just holding out for the right offer and that surely I shouldn't be here if the first line of my bio was correct.
I've always had options on fab, not because I'm anything special, but because I've maintained my self respect and have turned down at least twice as many offers as I've accepted.
I've met 60+ people in 9 years and half of those were at group socials.
Of the 30 or so I've met one on one, only one of those was without a social and only 10 percent of the total meets have gone beyond that initial social.
My choice every single time and I have no regrets. As I said above, my method works for me."
Absolutely I didn’t mean to imply this was purely a male issue, I’m certain that this sort of behaviour has no gender boundaries.
In fact there’s definitely some ladies and couples who have messaged me for bi play (I’m straight), who clearly haven’t been told no before. A huge sense of entitlement resides in them I believe.
Rejection happens to us all and to be here you need a level head and emotional maturity to handle it with grace.
It sounds like you have your head screwed on xxx |
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